The Lucy Show-S6E8: Lucy And Robert Goulet
30min | Comedy | TV Series (1962–1968)
When a handsome truck driver is turned down for a loan, she convinces him to enter a Robert Goulet look alike contest in order to win the needed cash.
Creators: Bob Carroll Jr., Madelyn Davis, Bob Schiller
Stars: Lucille Ball, Gale Gordon, Vivian Vance
30min | Comedy | TV Series (1962–1968)
When a handsome truck driver is turned down for a loan, she convinces him to enter a Robert Goulet look alike contest in order to win the needed cash.
Creators: Bob Carroll Jr., Madelyn Davis, Bob Schiller
Stars: Lucille Ball, Gale Gordon, Vivian Vance
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00The Lucy Show Starring Lucille Ball
00:16Co-starring Gail Gordon
00:30Co-starring Mary Jane
00:39Are you ready to order?
00:52Oh, not yet.
00:53I'm waiting for some friends.
00:54Okay.
00:55Oh, Daddy.
00:56Hi, Lucy.
00:57Where's Mary Jane?
00:58Oh, I don't know.
01:00Oh, she couldn't make it.
01:01Things are very hectic at the studio.
01:02Oh, you know, we've been very busy at the bank.
01:03What'll it be, girls?
01:04Oh, what'll you have, Daddy?
01:05Oh, gee, I don't know.
01:06I'm on a diet.
01:07Me, too.
01:08Lucy, you don't have to lose weight.
01:09I'm not dieting to lose weight.
01:10I'm dieting to save money.
01:11I thought you were going to ask Mr. Mooney for a five-dollar raise.
01:12I did ask him, but I didn't get it.
01:13You know that he turned me down for a measly five-dollar raise?
01:14Oh, I don't know.
01:15Oh, I don't know.
01:16Oh, I don't know.
01:17Oh, I don't know.
01:18Oh, I don't know.
01:19Oh, I don't know.
01:20I thought you were going to ask Mr. Mooney for a five-dollar raise.
01:23I did ask him, but I didn't get it.
01:25You know that he turned me down for a measly five-dollar raise?
01:29But it's all right for him to squander 75 dollars on film for his camera.
01:34Gee, this is fascinating.
01:36Maybe somebody went to order something.
01:43Well, I'll have a cup of tea.
01:45And?
01:46That's it.
01:49And I'll have a bowl of hot water.
01:53A bowl of hot water?
01:56Did you come here to eat or take a bath?
02:01And, Dottie, you'd like some extra lemon with your tea, wouldn't you?
02:05Oh, some extra lemon with my tea.
02:09One tea, extra lemon, a bowl of hot water.
02:15Anything else? Diamond Jane Brady?
02:20No, that'll be all.
02:23Boy, I don't like her attitude.
02:26If she keeps that up, I'm not coming in here to eat anymore.
02:31What are those?
02:33What do you got there?
02:34Pictures of entries in the contest.
02:36What contest?
02:37The Robert Goulet look-alike contest.
02:39Robert Goulet look-alike contest?
02:41Yeah, the studio's having a contest to promote his new picture,
02:44The Long Ride of Marshall Burke.
02:46And they're giving $5,000 to the man who looks most like Robert Goulet.
02:51Oh, boy, $5,000.
02:54Here we are.
02:56Tea, extra lemon, a bowl of hot water.
03:04Eat hearty.
03:07Oh, she's too much, isn't she?
03:11Oh!
03:26Sorry, Dotty, I'm sorry, forgive me.
03:29I forget to cover it.
03:32There we are.
03:38Congratulations.
03:40You're winning the war on poverty.
03:43Well, we all have to do our bit.
03:49Listen, Dotty,
03:52those look-alike contests, are they ever on the level?
03:55Of course, what makes you think they're not?
03:58Well, I once entered an Elizabeth Taylor look-alike contest
04:02and I never even heard from them.
04:06You expected to win an Elizabeth Taylor look-alike contest?
04:10Oh, of course not, I'm too tall.
04:29Hi, Mr. Mooney, I'm back.
04:32Mrs. Carmichael, you take longer to eat lunch than Henry VIII.
04:38I had to do a little shopping and I...
04:40Please, please, no excuses.
04:42When you get to work, we have a lot to do.
04:44Yes, sir.
04:45Please, please.
04:58Ma'am, I wonder if you could help me.
05:01Oh, I certainly hope so.
05:04I'd like to apply for a loan. My name is Chuck Willis and...
05:08Oh, I thought you were...
05:11Your name is Chuck Willis?
05:14Something wrong with that name?
05:16Oh, no, sir. No, sir, I love it, I love it.
05:18You want to apply for a loan, right over here.
05:21See this gentleman right here.
05:23Mr. Mooney, this gentleman would like to apply for a loan.
05:26This is Mr. Willis.
05:27Mr. Willis?
05:29I have a small trucking business.
05:31Very small, just got one truck, which needs some work.
05:34I take about 200 bucks to fix it up and I'd like to borrow the money.
05:38Well, do you have any collateral, Mr. Willis?
05:41Well, only my truck.
05:43Here's the registration slip.
05:45Uh-huh.
05:47Mr. Willis, this truck is 21 years old.
05:52Well, that's why it needs fixing.
05:56I'm very sorry, Mr. Willis.
05:58I'm sorry.
06:07Mr. Willis.
06:11Mr. Willis, do you really need money?
06:13Oh, no, no, no, I'm really an eccentric millionaire.
06:16Of course I need money.
06:18I've got to get that truck fixed.
06:20Yeah, I know. Well, I know how you can get a brand new truck
06:23just by having your picture taken.
06:26My picture taken?
06:27Yeah, and you'll get $5,000,
06:30which you will split with me because I will arrange everything.
06:35You know, you're a little nuts.
06:39Well, now, that may be, but you know something?
06:41You look just like Robert Goulet.
06:45Who?
06:47Robert Goulet.
06:50I never heard of him.
06:52Well, anyway, you look like him.
06:53The man in the studio is giving $5,000
06:55to the man who looks the most like him.
06:57Now, what have you got to lose?
06:59My mind.
07:00Now, look. Now, listen to me.
07:02You just be at this address tonight.
07:04I'll take your picture and your troubles will be over.
07:07You just look at the birdie and pow, instant money.
07:10You know something?
07:11What?
07:12We don't need no birdie. You'll do.
07:15Now, what do you mean by that?
07:16You're a cuckoo.
07:18Will you stop it? I'm just trying to help you.
07:20Okay, okay, like you say.
07:22What have I got to lose, right?
07:23Good.
07:24Don't lose the address.
07:26And be there at 8 o'clock, okay?
07:27Oh, I'll be there.
07:28All right. You won't regret it.
07:29Okay.
07:33Mr. Mooney.
07:34Mr. Mooney, I have wonderful news.
07:36Good. When are you quitting?
07:39I'm not quitting.
07:40Mamma's Studio is running a Robert Goulet look-alike contest.
07:44Robert Goo-who?
07:47Robert Goulet.
07:49He's a big star.
07:50And I have the winner of that look-alike contest.
07:53Well, bully, I hope you'll both be very happy.
07:56Mr. Mooney, that man, that Mr. Willis that was just in here,
08:00he's a cinch to win the contest.
08:01He'll get first prize.
08:03And all you have to do is take his picture.
08:06Who? Take what?
08:08Well, I can't afford a professional photographer.
08:11And even if I could, he wouldn't be as good as you are.
08:13Why, you just take wonderful, wonderful pictures.
08:16This picture of Mrs. Mooney is just fantastic.
08:20That is a picture of the Grand Canyon.
08:27You know, it does look like Irma with her mouth open.
08:31Yeah, well, anyway, it's a marvelous picture.
08:34Why, it's like a Da Vinci.
08:36Da Vinci was a painter.
08:38Oh.
08:39And I am a banker and I have work to do.
08:41And so do you.
08:42Will you please get at it?
08:44Go, go, go, go, go, go.
08:48Well, there goes all that money.
08:50Oh, dear.
08:53All what money?
08:55Well, that's what I'm trying to tell you.
08:57The winner of the contest gets $5,000.
09:00And Mr. Willis is giving me half for arranging everything.
09:04Now, do you realize what my half comes to?
09:06Certainly. $1,250.
09:10$1,250?
09:12Half of $5,000 is $2,500.
09:15Yes, and half of your $2,500 is my $1,250.
09:20You're joking.
09:22Then why aren't you laughing?
09:26Well, why should you give half of my half?
09:28I'll give you 10%.
09:30Mrs. Carmichael, you do not bargain with Leonardo Da Vinci.
09:43Oh, come on in, Mr. Mooney.
09:49Good heavens, do you need all that junk?
09:52This junk happens to be some of the most expensive photographic equipment money can buy.
09:58Is Willis here yet?
10:00Yes, he's inside getting into his costume.
10:02Costume?
10:04Yeah, I borrowed a wig from him.
10:06Oh, I see.
10:08He's inside getting into his costume.
10:10Costume?
10:11Yeah, I borrowed a western outfit for him.
10:14Just to take a picture?
10:15Yes, now all the other contestants are sending in plain head shots, you know.
10:19But Robert Goulet is playing a marshal in the picture.
10:22So we photographed Chuck as a western marshal.
10:25Now that is showmanship.
10:28I must admit, Mrs. Carmichael, you are thinking.
10:33Which is more than you do in the band.
10:36Why do you always have to add that?
10:38True.
10:39Good heavens.
10:40Look at this.
10:41What?
10:42Who's that?
10:43It's Robert Goulet.
10:45He's in his western outfit for the picture, see.
10:47Now when I get through with Chuck, he's going to look exactly like that.
10:51I have all the makeup right here.
10:53See?
10:54Grease paint, rouge, eye shadow, eyebrow pencil, mascara, everything.
10:59Wouldn't plastic surgery be simpler?
11:03Well, here's our marshal now.
11:22Oh, you must give me the name of your tailor.
11:29Gee, it does look a little snug.
11:31I got a tattoo that's looser.
11:35Well, I can't understand it.
11:37I got a size 38.
11:39I'm a size 42.
11:41Oh, well, I'm sorry.
11:42Sit down, Chuck.
11:47Sitting in these pants?
11:48You've got to be kidding me.
11:50Well, come on now.
11:51You've got to sit down while I put the makeup on you.
11:53Makeup?
11:54Oh, no.
11:55You're not putting any of that guck on me.
11:57Now I have to.
11:58I have to make you up to look like Robert Goulet in the picture now.
12:01If you want to win the $5,000, sit down.
12:07Well, okay.
12:08But I never figured I'd have to put on makeup to get my truck fixed.
12:15Now then.
12:17Take off your hat.
12:22I can't.
12:23My arms don't bend.
12:25Oh, all right.
12:27There.
12:29Now.
12:31Now I'm going to have to give you some real bushy eyebrows.
12:34Because Mr. Goulet is wearing very bushy eyebrows in this picture.
12:38And all western marshals, you know, always have those big bushy eyebrows.
12:49Is it always this painful?
12:51Oh, no.
12:52But hold still.
12:54There.
12:55Now.
12:56Now I'm going to put some eye shadow up here because I want you to look...
12:59Close your eyes.
13:00And relax your face.
13:03I want you to look real weather people.
13:11I could have done...
13:16What's that?
13:18Haven't you ever seen a horse before?
13:20Haven't you ever seen a horse before?
13:35That's a horse?
13:38Now what did you expect for three dollars?
13:40Man of war?
13:43Come on, Chuck.
13:45What's taking him so long?
13:46You sure you got the right flashback?
13:48Well, of course.
13:49Come on, Chuck.
13:50Hurry up.
13:51Hurrying in this outfit would be suicide.
14:02What's that?
14:04That is a horse.
14:05You are a marshal.
14:06You got to have a horse.
14:08Now come on.
14:09Leap into the saddle.
14:12Not with these pants on.
14:14Come on now, Chuck.
14:16We got to have you up there so we can take the picture.
14:18Come on.
14:32Forget it.
14:33There's no way to get up in that hammock.
14:35All right, Mr. Mooney.
14:36Don't just stand there.
14:37Come on.
14:38Help him up.
14:39Oh.
14:40All right.
14:41Well, now, let's see.
14:44Grab my leg.
14:45Grab my leg.
14:46Your leg.
14:47Leg up.
14:48Here we go.
14:49Are you ready?
14:50Up and over.
14:58Forget it.
14:59Told you it's impossible.
15:00Now, Chuck, nothing is impossible now.
15:02You got to get up there so we can take the picture.
15:05Now, come on.
15:07Let's see.
15:08If I...
15:09Well, maybe...
15:10No.
15:11Do the same way.
15:13Come here.
15:14Do you have this much trouble making gone with the wind?
15:23Oh, good, good, good.
15:24Oh, yeah.
15:25You're doing fine.
15:26You're doing fine.
15:27Get your legs over there.
15:40Okay, how's that?
15:41How could anything stuffed with hay be this hard?
15:44All right, Mr. Mooney.
15:45Are you ready?
15:46Come on.
15:47I'm ready.
15:48I'm all set.
15:49Make sure you got the right flash bulb and everything.
15:50Now, Chuck.
15:51Chuck, I want you to sit up straight
15:52and look off into the sunset.
15:55Stop it, Chuck.
15:56The sunsets over there don't look like an Indian.
15:59Sit back there.
16:00Look off there
16:01and get that special look
16:02that Western Marshall did.
16:06All right.
16:07All right now, Chuck, smile.
16:08Smile?
16:09About what?
16:11Smile.
16:14I got it.
16:15I got it.
16:16Oh, that was a good one.
16:17That was a beauty.
16:18Are you sure?
16:19Yes, yes.
16:20Everything's...
16:21All right, all right.
16:22Now you can get down, Chuck.
16:23Yeah.
16:24That's what you think.
16:26Help him down.
16:27Give me the camera.
16:28Be careful.
16:29I will.
16:30Be careful.
16:31Oh, come on.
16:32Okay.
16:33There we go.
16:37Oh.
16:38Yeah, you sure you got a good one, Mr. Mooney?
16:40Oh, it was perfect.
16:41Oh, I want to tell you, Chuck,
16:42that's $5,000 in the bag.
16:44Isn't that great?
16:45You'll be able to get rid of
16:46your old broken-down truck.
16:48Well, right now,
16:49that old broken-down truck
16:50is in better shape than I am.
17:02Oh, boy.
17:03$5,000.
17:05I sure hope we won.
17:07Well, I do say so myself,
17:08that was one of the best pictures
17:10I've ever taken.
17:11Yeah?
17:12Yeah.
17:13I hope you had the right lens
17:14for tight pants.
17:17Well, you know,
17:18the contest is over
17:19at 6 o'clock today,
17:20and Dorothy promised
17:21to come right over here
17:22and tell us who won.
17:23Well, whatever happens,
17:24I sure appreciate
17:25all the trouble you went to for me.
17:27Well, it was a pleasure, Chuck.
17:29Oh, I hope that's Dorothy.
17:32$5,000.
17:34Hi, Dotty.
17:35Hi, Lucy.
17:36Oh, boy,
17:37have we been waiting for you.
17:38Yeah, well, I got here
17:39since I could.
17:40Hello, Mr. Mooney.
17:41Hello.
17:42Mr. Goulet,
17:43what are you doing here?
17:44Ah, hi.
17:45You see, what did I tell you?
17:47That is not Mr. Goulet.
17:49It isn't?
17:50No, it isn't.
17:51Then who is it?
17:52Oh, I think you probably
17:54know his name.
17:55How would I know his name?
17:57Well, now, who won the contest?
17:59Arthur Finster.
18:01Arthur Finster?
18:02Arthur Finster?
18:04Who's Arthur Finster?
18:06Well, he won first prize.
18:08Melvin Copple was second
18:09and Irving Schwartz third.
18:11Oh, but it's too bad
18:12he didn't enter the contest.
18:14Oh, I'm sure Mr. Goulet
18:15would have picked him as the winner.
18:17But he did enter.
18:19He did?
18:20Yes, he did.
18:21I told you those contests were fake.
18:24You know, Chuck,
18:25tomorrow we're going over there
18:26and see that Mr. Robert Goulet.
18:27What for?
18:28Because I'm not gonna
18:29let him get away with this.
18:30I let Elizabeth Taylor
18:31get away with it,
18:32but never again.
18:35How did Elizabeth Taylor
18:37get into that?
18:38Yeah, well...
18:43There's nothing wrong
18:44in being sentimental
18:49If the one you love
18:51is sweet and strong
18:54and gentle
18:58Put pride aside
19:03And tell me that you love me
19:08And maybe a tear
19:12will show
19:15that I love you
19:29You know,
19:30that's really very catchy.
19:31I'm glad you like it.
19:32You really read it yourself,
19:33Mr. Goulet?
19:34Yes, I wrote it myself.
19:35Wonderful.
19:37Mr. Goulet's office.
19:39Oh, okay.
19:40They want you on the set
19:41in 30 minutes.
19:43Okay.
19:44I'll go in and change.
19:46Mr. Goulet,
19:48the photo lab sent this over.
20:02You had it enlarged?
20:04Oh, yeah.
20:05If things get really grim around here,
20:07I can always get a good laugh from this.
20:09Can you imagine some nut
20:11sending this into the contest?
20:14You know,
20:15it does look a little like you.
20:18Oh, I wish you hadn't said that.
20:22That's the worst thing
20:23that's been said about me
20:25since I forgot the words
20:26to the Star Spangled Banner.
20:30Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Goulet,
20:32but ever since we had that contest,
20:34everybody looks like you.
20:36Don't forget,
20:37I had to look at thousands of goulets.
20:39I had to look at tall goulets,
20:41short goulets,
20:42fat goulets,
20:43thin goulets,
20:44brunette goulets,
20:45blonde goulets,
20:46bald goulets,
20:47French goulets,
20:48Italian goulets,
20:49German goulets,
20:50Hungarian goulets,
20:51and German goulets.
20:53They're all over the place.
20:56Take it easy.
20:58You're gonna be all right.
21:01I've only got two more visits
21:03to my psychiatrist's lab.
21:05Just relax.
21:06Take it easy and sit down.
21:09I've got to have quiet.
21:19I'm glad you like it.
21:21May I help you?
21:24Chuck, come in here.
21:30There it is.
21:32Chuck?
21:33Now, that proves that you entered the contest.
21:37Oh, it's a little.
21:39No wonder I never won.
21:40Never mind that.
21:41There's something crooked going on around here,
21:43and we're going to get to the bottom of it.
21:45Alec, Mrs. Carmichael,
21:46I've had enough,
21:47and I don't want any more trouble.
21:49But we've got trouble,
21:50and they gave it to us,
21:51and we're gonna give it back.
21:52No, no, you give it back.
21:53I'll wait for you outside in the hall.
21:55Oh, Chuck.
22:01I would like to see Mr. Goulet, please.
22:04So would I.
22:06So would I.
22:08Yes, miss Ellen?
22:10Is that you, Mr. Goulet?
22:12Well, now, of course it's me.
22:13Who are you expecting, Arthur Finster?
22:16Ah-ha!
22:17So they know each other.
22:18Then it was fixed.
22:19Whoever you are, you better come out here.
22:23Now, what's going on, Miss Erlo?
22:25That is what I would like to know, Mr. Goulet.
22:29And who are you?
22:30Never mind who I am.
22:32Come with me.
22:34Come, come.
22:40What have you got to say about him?
22:53I must be hitting too many high notes.
23:00Mr. Goulet?
23:02I wouldn't bet on it.
23:09Chuck.
23:10Yeah?
23:11Come on in here.
23:15Now, we're going into Mr. Goulet's office,
23:17and we're gonna find out about this.
23:18Now, go on. Get in there.
23:21Don't leave me.
23:26You better not crack me up.
23:27I don't want to be out here alone.
23:29What's the matter with you?
23:30I'm sick.
23:34Mr. Goulet?
23:36No, I'm Chuck.
23:37Come on.
23:38What happened?
23:39What happened?
23:40It's wonderful.
23:42What? What's wonderful?
23:43Mr. Goulet just hired me as his double.
23:46What?
23:47And I'm getting a salary
23:49I never heard of in my whole life.
23:51Hey, you know, that Goulet's sure a nice guy.
23:53He's a lousy actor, but a nice guy.
23:57You'll like him.
23:58I'll like him?
23:59Oh, yeah.
24:00He wants to have you out for lunch tomorrow
24:01to thank you for getting us together.
24:02Me? Lunch with Mr. Goulet?
24:04Yeah.
24:05When?
24:06Tomorrow.
24:07Tomorrow?
24:08How about that?
24:10I'm in show business.
24:13Oh, gee.
24:15Oh, gee, did you hear that?
24:16I'm gonna have lunch with Robert Goulet.
24:18Oh, oh, my hair.
24:20I gotta do my hair.
24:21And what'll I wear?
24:22Where will we go?
24:23What'll we have?
24:24Champagne, I bet.
24:26Champagne caviar.
24:27Champagne...
24:31Mr. Goulet?
24:32Chuck?
24:34No, I'm Arthur Finster.
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25:18© BF-WATCH TV 2021