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Junior Taskmaster Season 1 Episode 2

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00:00Right let's go
00:11Can you take this to my head?
00:15Cool plus cool
00:20That was quite pathetic, don't you think?
00:30Hello and welcome to Junior Taskmaster, my name is Rose Matafeo.
00:38Some of you might recognise me from that other Taskmaster show.
00:42Boring.
00:43Some of you may be more familiar with my 30 year long career as a professional golfer,
00:48but most of you probably know me as a compulsive liar.
00:51Now over the series, 25 children will be battling it out through five heats and two semis
00:57in the hope of reaching the grand final and winning the thing that every child dreams of.
01:02This right here.
01:03Yes, no, it is not the head of Weird Al Yankovic.
01:07Tonight's winner will be taking home all of the prize tasks you see this evening.
01:11However, the contestants who come first and second will both win an illustrious spot in the semi-finals.
01:18Right, let's meet tonight's contestants.
01:19Please welcome Saira.
01:23Quinn.
01:24Maisie.
01:28Ollie.
01:30Anza.
01:34Right, so now, a lot of people told me I was making a big mistake when I decided to hire this man, right?
01:40He's a weird guy, they said.
01:42What's he hiding behind that moustache, they screamed.
01:45I once saw him walk past a mirror and he didn't have a reflection.
01:48They garbled.
01:49Well, all I can say is this.
01:51He was available and he was very cheap.
01:54It's Mike.
01:55What's the end?
01:59Thank you, Rose.
02:01Ultimately, this is a show about the dangers of playing with matches.
02:05In 2009, David Reynolds of Southampton earned a Guinness World Record for making a model North Sea oil rig using 14 million matches.
02:13It took him 15 years, during which he could have qualified as an optometrist five times.
02:17So don't play with matches, kids.
02:19It's not just your time you're wasting, it's that of people waiting for eye tests, potentially.
02:26To reiterate, he was available and very cheap, yeah?
02:30OK, I think it's time for Mike to reveal tonight's prize task.
02:33This week, our contestants have been asked to bring in the most glamorous object ever.
02:39Rose will give five points to the most glamorous object ever.
02:43And at the end of this episode, the overall winner will have five extraordinarily glamorous objects to take home with them.
02:49But let's see what our contestants have got for us.
02:52All right, Saira, I would love to start with you. How are you doing?
02:55I'm doing fine, thank you.
02:56I want you to tell me all about the most glamorous object ever that you've brought in tonight.
03:00OK, so the most glamorous object ever that I've brought in tonight is silk napkins.
03:09Ooh! The height of luxury!
03:13First of all, normal people would just, like, get tissue or whatever's close to them to wipe their mouth.
03:19But people who can afford napkins like these reusable silk napkins must be really rich.
03:27Is rich the same as being glamorous?
03:28I mean, if you're having fancy dinner parties with those and origami swans on plates, then yes.
03:35Yeah? I like that.
03:37All righty, Gwyn, what have you brought in for your prize task this evening?
03:40Right, brace yourselves.
03:42A dual toilet seat.
03:47Glamorous?
03:48Yeah!
03:49Would you say, comfortable?
03:50Ah!
03:51Hey, hey!
03:52I see people wearing high heels.
03:53They don't look comfortable, but they're glamorous.
03:55People have to suffer for glamour.
03:57Oh!
03:59How do you clean that, Gwyn?
04:01Well, I would advise some very glamorous wet wipes.
04:05Silk napkins, or...?
04:06LAUGHTER
04:07OK, lovely such, Ben. Thank you so much.
04:11All righty.
04:12Welcome to the show, Maisie.
04:13How are you?
04:14Quite well.
04:15I would love to know what glamorous object you brought in for us tonight.
04:19I brought in a gemstone.
04:22OK.
04:23Why are you so into gemstones, Maisie?
04:24No idea, but I think...
04:27But I think it's got something to do with the fact that they are glamorous.
04:32I brought in a Liverpool shop for £5.
04:34OK.
04:35Do you think it might have any magic in it?
04:38Are you into that kind of thing at all?
04:40Yeah.
04:41Erm...
04:42I have an...
04:43a coven that I started.
04:47Does that make you like a witch or a warlock or something?
04:49Yeah.
04:50What?
04:52How many people are in the coven?
04:54Four.
04:55Not including myself.
04:57Do you do good in the coven, or you...?
04:59It depends.
05:00LAUGHTER
05:03OK.
05:04Well, keep an eye on you, Maisie.
05:06Erm...
05:07Throughout the show.
05:08Now, Oli, how are you doing?
05:09Good.
05:10What is your most glamorous object you brought in?
05:12I was thinking that a top hat is very glamorous.
05:15Oh, yes.
05:16I tried to make it even more glamorous.
05:19How so?
05:20Stick some gems on it.
05:23LAUGHTER
05:24Oh, no!
05:25APPLAUSE
05:28Well, Hobbycraft are making a real mint this week
05:30with the, er...
05:31with all the gems flying out the door.
05:34Would you wear this out yourself, Oli?
05:36No.
05:37LAUGHTER
05:38Why not?
05:39Mike, you could really rock that.
05:40I could pull that off.
05:41You're a drummer, aren't you?
05:42Yeah.
05:43Would you consider wearing that in a...
05:45in a gig?
05:46Probably a singer would.
05:47It's a very Slash look, actually.
05:48It's quite, yeah.
05:49Yeah.
05:50If I put that on, I'd look like Slash, unfortunately.
05:52LAUGHTER
05:55Zach, welcome to the show.
05:56What glamorous object are you bringing to the table?
05:59I have brought in golden Greg sausage rolls.
06:03LAUGHTER
06:04APPLAUSE
06:06OK.
06:09Zach, you're going to have to talk me through this one.
06:14OK.
06:15Since Greg's is, like, the fanciest British food chain.
06:20LAUGHTER
06:21Is that right?
06:22Is that right?
06:23Would you guys agree with that?
06:24Greg's is the fanciest British food chain?
06:25No.
06:26No.
06:27Yes.
06:28Especially the doughnuts.
06:29I know it's doughnuts.
06:30No.
06:31I don't even think it's a food chain.
06:32Well, as you can see, it has a top pack,
06:33cos top packs are fancy.
06:35It's been proven by Oli.
06:37LAUGHTER
06:38And it has googly eyes cos nothing's better.
06:41That's the only thing you miss.
06:43LAUGHTER
06:44Fair enough.
06:47APPLAUSE
06:48OK.
06:49I'm going to go with one point for Maisie,
06:51for the gemstone.
06:52Saira, two points for the silk napkins.
06:54I know there was technically more gemstones on it,
06:57but Oli, I'm going to give you three points,
06:59but because I love the juxtaposition of a toilet seat
07:01and jewels, it's four points to Gwen.
07:04But it's got to be the millionaire's buffet there.
07:06I've got to, yeah, it's five points a day.
07:08We've got to finish the day.
07:09We've got to finish the day.
07:10APPLAUSE
07:14OK, it is time for the first task of the night.
07:17Or, as they like to say in France,
07:19le task premier.
07:21Oh, comme dit bonsoir.
07:24Task?
07:25Task.
07:26Task.
07:27So, lots of people assume middle-aged men like me
07:29are unable to nurture friendships
07:31and don't have any proper chums.
07:33So, just to prove them wrong,
07:34I got my mate Mark involved with this next coffee-based task,
07:37so those people can just froth off.
07:40LAUGHTER
07:54Hi.
07:56Hello, Zac.
07:57Hello, Mike.
07:58Hello, Maisie.
07:59How are you?
08:00Good, thanks.
08:01Hello.
08:02Hello, Oli.
08:03Raring to go?
08:04Yeah.
08:05Shall we do it?
08:06Hello, Colonel Wozniak.
08:07Hello, Gwen.
08:08I like this Colonel Wozniak thing.
08:10What makes you think of me as a colonel?
08:12Because colonels have mustaches.
08:14OK.
08:15And because of my gravitas, perhaps, as well?
08:18No.
08:19No.
08:20Hello, Cyra.
08:21Oh.
08:22What do you make of all this?
08:23What do you make of all this?
08:24This...
08:25I don't like coffee.
08:26May I trade the toss?
08:27Certainly.
08:28Safely deliver Mike's mate Mark, a medium mocker.
08:33You cannot walk on the grass, the fullest delivered cup wins.
08:37You have 15 minutes, your time starts now.
08:39Right, so I'm thinking that guy over there's Mark.
08:41That's Mark, all right.
08:42Some people say he's, um, something of a snappy dresser.
08:49Hmm.
08:50Agree to disagree.
08:53What's a medium mocker?
08:55Well, it's in between a small mocker and a large mocker.
08:58What's a mocker?
08:59What's a mocker?
09:00A mocker is a type of coffee.
09:01How do I make it?
09:02All the information's in the task.
09:03APPLAUSE
09:04So, uh, none of you, uh, none of you done any part-time work at a cafe, eh?
09:14Nah.
09:15I've done window cleaning.
09:16Have you?
09:17I'm cleaning barrels.
09:18Really?
09:19Yeah, I'm really good.
09:20I've made, like, some pretty good money off it.
09:21Oh!
09:22Quinn?
09:23Yes?
09:24I guess you could have said, my home is like a cafe.
09:26I'm always making tea for my parents.
09:28Always.
09:29Really?
09:30OK, how do they take the tea?
09:31Medium bro.
09:33Is this paid work?
09:34Are you getting anything back for this?
09:36Sadly, no.
09:37It's child labour.
09:38LAUGHTER
09:39I'm ready for a caffeine hit.
09:41Mike, who have we got?
09:42OK, first up we have Gwen and Maisie.
09:46Made a mocker before?
09:48No.
09:50Why does Mark want a coffee?
09:52Does he just want a coffee?
09:53He didn't get much sleep last night.
09:55He's had quite an intense life.
09:57OK.
09:58I'm not going to ask.
10:02Oh!
10:03Right, there we go.
10:05Is it optional to bring one of those to Mark?
10:08All the information's in the task.
10:10I hate the way you keep saying that.
10:12Is that what you've been paid to do?
10:16Right.
10:17Can I have a look in the shed, please?
10:22Gonna need this and this, just in case.
10:26It says I can't walk on the grass.
10:28Does not say I cannot walk on rolls of paper over the grass.
10:33I'm making a path, so I don't have to walk on the grass.
10:36Wait a minute.
10:39Does it not say I can't hop on the grass?
10:49Ha, ha, ha.
10:51How's it going?
10:52I just felt cold coffee all over my hands.
10:54Cold coffee?
10:55Oh, poor Mark.
10:56What does he expect?
11:05Hey, it's a mocker.
11:06He never said it had to be hot.
11:10OK, do I have to get back?
11:12So, you've got seven minutes left.
11:14Ooh, OK.
11:15Oh!
11:16Oh!
11:17You cannot walk on the grass.
11:19No.
11:20Can I run on the grass?
11:21Ha, ha!
11:22Yeah!
11:24Is that running, is it?
11:25Yes, it's running!
11:26Woo-hoo!
11:27Woo-hoo!
11:28Woo-hoo!
11:29Woo-hoo!
11:35There you go, Mark.
11:43Are you going to leave him the biscuit?
11:45I've left him that biscuit and I'm going to eat this one.
11:48Could you get me a biscuit?
11:50Do you want a biscuit?
11:51I'd just like to be offered a biscuit.
11:53I'll offer you a biscuit, then.
11:54Just...
11:57Hopping all the way back.
12:02Would you like a biscuit, Mike?
12:03No, thank you.
12:04LAUGHTER
12:11Amazing!
12:12You really look like you enjoyed that biscuit.
12:14Yeah, it was a good biscuit.
12:16Did you just come on Junior to ask myself for the free food?
12:18I prefer not to be asked that question.
12:20LAUGHTER
12:22You both had very similar ideas at the beginning, right?
12:24You were straight to the shed, straight with the wrapping paper.
12:27Gwen, it didn't work out for you, though, did it?
12:29No.
12:31How quickly did you give up on that one?
12:32After they blew away in the wind.
12:35Yeah, not great.
12:37Gwen was the only person I think could make eye contact with Mark
12:39and gave him a smile.
12:40So, service-wise...
12:41But, equally, she did also smash a glass cafeteria on his right foot.
12:44LAUGHTER
12:45So, it very much swings and roundabouts.
12:48There's the whole debate over the hop versus...
12:50Was that a mini-walk?
12:51Was that a tiny hop that we saw?
12:53I would say it was a mini-hop.
12:55LAUGHTER
12:56You said walk on the grass.
12:57Some people might argue that I was standing still on the grass.
13:01Some people might argue that I was mini-hopping.
13:03Wow.
13:04A very compelling tone of voice.
13:05I don't know if it ever made sense.
13:06LAUGHTER
13:07Yeah.
13:08But you've got to be careful when negotiating these points
13:10with a member of a coven, haven't you?
13:13LAUGHTER
13:14Yeah.
13:15Yeah, right.
13:16Did you just say, yeah, right?
13:17Oh, wow.
13:18Yeah.
13:19I'm getting a stare down as well.
13:21Yeah.
13:22OK.
13:24I think it is time for a break.
13:25We have a break, and as part of your Junior Taskmaster subscription,
13:28each week we include a hand-picked selection box of
13:31artisanal, organic, gourmet advertisements
13:33for your viewing pleasure.
13:34So, enjoy.
13:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
13:50Welcome back to Junior Taskmaster.
13:51Michael, I would like to see more children
13:54taking mockers to mark immediately, please.
13:57Here you are.
13:59I want to know what disc does.
14:01Mm-hm.
14:02Oh, no, don't do that.
14:04Oh.
14:05Recipes.
14:06Expresso, hot chocolate and frosty milk.
14:09So, what's the mocha?
14:11Probably coffee, I'm assuming.
14:13Oh, that looks nice.
14:15I think that's cocoa.
14:17I'm pretty sure it's edible, though.
14:19That's the main thing.
14:21Well, you don't want a poison mark, do you?
14:23Oh, gosh, this isn't working, is it?
14:25It's leaking everywhere.
14:26Have you heard that in a cafe?
14:27Yeah.
14:28OK.
14:29I mean, I would drink it.
14:30Where do I have to deliver it's toast?
14:31To my mate Mark.
14:32It's not Mark.
14:33Of course that's Mark.
14:34It looks like he needs a coffee.
14:35Yeah.
14:36Let's go to the shed.
14:37He doesn't look like a good man, maybe a criminal.
14:38That's my best friend Mark you're talking about.
14:39Get him these bricks.
14:40What are you going to do with them?
14:41Those little platforms.
14:42I'm just going to use this and this.
14:43I'm using them my stepping stone.
14:45Did I ever tell you the story of how Mark and I met?
14:46How would you just.
14:47To possa be with his hands?
14:49I thought it was love.
14:50Peter and
15:09Huh?
15:11How?
15:12We were both backing dancers for Shakira's 2009 She-Wolf tour.
15:16Shakira?
15:17Yeah, yeah, yeah.
15:18So, basically, he and I were working together on a sort of haddock trollership.
15:21Yeah.
15:22I was a bosun.
15:23He was just a figurehead back then.
15:24He saved my life.
15:25Did he?
15:26Yeah.
15:27Mer-monkey tried to drag me under.
15:29Did it?
15:30I got snagged on his left elbow, started from drowning.
15:35Long story short, he saved my life in Vegas.
15:38How?
15:39I'm not sure I can tell you until you're 18.
15:42Oh.
15:43You've got 38 seconds left.
15:48Oh, God!
15:49Just look at the eyes.
15:51It makes him look desperate.
15:53Sad.
15:54Sad.
15:55He has no-one to love him.
15:57He's got me.
15:58Here you are, Mark.
15:59Is it go time?
16:05It's time.
16:07Yeah.
16:21You go.
16:23Hey, Zach.
16:26Thank you!
16:26Thank you!
16:27Wow.
16:29Bold as brass.
16:32Zach, how does it feel?
16:34I'm pretty sure my IQ just dropped.
16:37And the drink that you got to Mark in the end
16:41looked a tiny bit more appetising, I suppose,
16:44than what Zyra put together.
16:46You said in there you would drink it yourself.
16:49Looking back, I think, no.
16:54Not at all. No, put off by the mocha.
16:56You were kind of really laying into Mark there.
16:59Yep, sad, desperate eyes.
17:02Can you read a lot from a person's eyes?
17:05But what can you read from my eyes?
17:08Not Mark.
17:11What's going on?
17:13Not in your life.
17:15It's actually quite a good skill.
17:19Alrighty, from my calculations, we've got one person to see now
17:23and it is Ollie and I'm excited.
17:25As you should be, Rose. Let's take a look at this.
17:28Big coffee guy?
17:30No.
17:32Espresso hot chocolate and frothy milk.
17:35How much sugar do you want?
17:38Shed.
17:40I've got a lot of roll here, some roll there.
17:45I've got so much roll!
17:47A bit windy, isn't it?
17:48Yes.
17:49Stay on there.
17:50Stay there.
17:51Stay on there.
17:52Stay there.
17:53Oh no, I forgot the mocha.
17:54No.
17:55No.
17:56Ah!
17:57Ah!
17:58Ah!
17:59Bit windy, isn't it?
18:00Yes.
18:01Stay on there.
18:02Stay there.
18:03Oh no, I forgot the mocha.
18:04No!
18:05Ah!
18:06Come in!
18:07Back to the shed.
18:08I'm going to put this on there.
18:12Yeah.
18:13Oh!
18:14Oh no, I forgot the mocha.
18:15No!
18:16Ah!
18:17Come in!
18:18Back to the shed.
18:19I'm going to put this on there.
18:21Yeah.
18:22Oh!
18:23I guess not.
18:24There.
18:25There.
18:26There.
18:27There.
18:28There.
18:29There.
18:30There.
18:31There.
18:32Oh!
18:33Oh!
18:34Oh!
18:35Oh!
18:36Oh!
18:37Oh!
18:38Oh!
18:39Oh!
18:40Oh!
18:41Oh!
18:42Oh!
18:43Oh!
18:44Oh!
18:45Oh!
18:46Oh!
18:47Oh!
18:48Oh!
18:49Oh!
18:50Crunch time, probably.
18:51Last 30 seconds or so, Ollie.
18:52Oh!
18:53Oh!
18:54Oh!
18:55Oh!
18:56Oh!
18:57Oh!
18:58Oh!
18:59Oh!
19:00Oh!
19:01Oh!
19:02Oh!
19:03Oh!
19:04Oh!
19:05Oh!
19:06Oh!
19:07Oh!
19:09Oh!
19:10Oh!
19:11Oh!
19:12Oh!
19:13Interesting!
19:17Here you go!
19:18WHISTLE WHISTLE
19:19I have to say, that was some of the most stressful television I have ever watched, Oli.
19:36I think that I did well and didn't.
19:45How was it to watch, Mike?
19:46He, I think you came up with roughly 8,000 different ideas.
19:53Half of them didn't work.
19:55What were you doing, Maisie? You just, you had a great idea there.
19:58No, I was just breathing neatly because I was stressed by what just happened.
20:05Honestly, a stressful watch for every one of you for that.
20:08This task is all about the fullest cup, isn't it, Mike?
20:10Yes, yes, and Mark did get five mockers.
20:13Zack managed 80 mils, Maisie, 110.
20:16Oli got 150 mils in the end.
20:18Syrah, 160.
20:20Gwen, just 10 mils shy of the maximum, with 227 millilitres.
20:24Oh.
20:25Fantastic.
20:26Right, points-wise.
20:27Yeah, points-wise.
20:28I mean, it's up to you how you deal with the grass-based infractions.
20:30The grass-based infractions, right.
20:31Well, I know, Zack and Oli, there was very clear infringement.
20:32You were on the grass.
20:33So, you both get one point for that.
20:34Three points for Maisie, because I don't want you to hex me.
20:37Syrah, I'm going to give you four points, but obviously Gwen, I'm going to give you the full five points for that task.
20:52Well done.
20:53APPLAUSE
20:56All righty.
20:57I want to see how that all affected the scoreboard.
20:59Okey-dokey.
21:00Well, it is tight.
21:01At the back of the pack, we've got Oli and Maisie, both on four, then Zack and Syrah, both on six.
21:05In the lead currently is Gwen with nine points.
21:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:12OK.
21:13Mike, what weird and wonderful place are you taking us next?
21:16Bessie Coleman, Patti Wagstaff, Aylmer of Malmesbury, all examples of...
21:23Aviation pioneers. Thank you, children.
21:26LAUGHTER
21:27But their time has been and gone.
21:29Now is the time for these five contestants to show us who is the new conqueror of the skies.
21:34MUSIC PLAYS
21:46Hello, Zack.
21:47Hi.
21:48Holly.
21:49Hello.
21:50Hello, Gwen.
21:51Hello.
21:52Syrah.
21:53Hello.
21:54Hello, Maisie.
21:55Hello.
21:56How are you?
21:57Good, thanks.
21:58Why...
22:00Intriguing.
22:01Yeah.
22:02Let's get straight to business.
22:05Make a paper aeroplane out of one of these things.
22:08You must use the paper you touch first.
22:10You may not cut or tear a piece of paper.
22:13Your paper aeroplane must look like a paper aeroplane.
22:16Once your paper aeroplane is complete...
22:18You have one attempt to launch it from the departure window.
22:21Furthest flight wins. You have ten minutes.
22:23Your time starts now.
22:25It says that I must use the piece of paper I touch first.
22:30So that's the one, is it?
22:33LAUGHTER
22:34Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
22:37APPLAUSE
22:39Oh, wow.
22:44The old toilet roll hole in the piece of paper trick, eh?
22:48I've never heard of that trick.
22:50LAUGHTER
22:51Come on, it's a classic.
22:53LAUGHTER
22:54Uh, yeah, have I got this right?
22:56This is all about making a paper aeroplane.
22:58First piece of paper you touch.
22:59Mm-hm.
23:00And that's the thing you need to make it out of.
23:02I would love to see how everyone gone on with this.
23:04I'll show you.
23:05Here we go.
23:08What's going on in that head of yours?
23:10I've already touched it, so...
23:11You've gone for it.
23:12You've made the choice.
23:13This is the paper I touch first.
23:15Is that a mistake?
23:17All the information's in the task.
23:19You must use the paper you touch first.
23:21Well, that's annoying.
23:22And, yes, I'm using the tiny one.
23:25I have no idea how to make a paper aeroplane.
23:28Oh, no.
23:31Oh.
23:33Great.
23:35You've got to suck your hole or cut in it.
23:38Is that useful or not useful?
23:40Actually, it could be useful.
23:42What are you thinking?
23:44I think this is going to be a very bad paper aeroplane.
23:47How's it going?
23:49Terribly.
23:50Mm-hm.
23:51If you didn't notice.
23:52Are you good at making paper aeroplanes?
23:53No.
23:54I always seem to do the wings wrong.
23:56Are the wings important?
23:58Without wings, would a plane fly?
24:00Would a bird fly?
24:02What do you think?
24:04No.
24:13That's bad.
24:14It's very much more than the stealth fighter.
24:18Is it, Gwen?
24:19Sure.
24:20Yeah.
24:21Done?
24:22Yeah.
24:23Happy?
24:24No, I'm not happy.
24:25I think it's done.
24:26Actually, no.
24:27Not yet.
24:28What does it need?
24:29Nothing.
24:30I just thought it was a bit too quick to say it's done.
24:32OK.
24:33Got my paper aeroplane.
24:35Let's go yeet it from the window.
24:37To the departure window.
24:38Let's go!
24:39Mmm.
24:41I hate this door.
24:45That's nice.
24:47Now, Saira, you seemed a little disappointed at the start.
24:50Where you were like, oh, no, it's the first piece of paper I touched.
24:53But now you're kind of thinking, maybe it was kind of a good idea.
24:56Yeah.
24:57Yeah.
24:58How do you feel watching that back now?
24:59Um, smart.
25:00And so you should!
25:01And so you should!
25:02So, at one point, let's go yeet it from the window.
25:03Yeah!
25:04I would love it if that's how pilots spoke.
25:05Let's yeet this plane to 33,000 feet.
25:06I mean, you guys did well.
25:07You know, using a piece of paper with a hole in it.
25:08I'd say they seemed to spawn to the times, but, I mean, Maisie, what does it say on your shirt tonight?
25:09It says, we can do anything.
25:10There we go.
25:11Including making a paper aeroplane with a hole-e piece of paper, right?
25:12Um, it depends on if you watch the next clip or not.
25:26Okay, including making a paper airplane with a whole e piece of paper, right?
25:32If you watch the next clip or not
25:41Fancy a lovely little advert break. There's nothing quite like it. See you soon
25:56That is a different shot and this show everything is meticulously planned and the points matter a heck of a lot
26:10Speaking of meticulous planning. Can we see how these paper airplanes went down or or up? Maybe
26:18Down straight down
26:26Holly are you ready? Yes, Zach. Yes, Sarah. Yeah, have you secured the buffet trolley? Yeah, when?
26:36Check the oil and water. Yeah, amazing. I like your lightsaber toys
26:43Thank you. You look very fetching in your jacket
26:47Really appreciate that Maisie means a lot to me
26:51Prepare for launch on my mark
26:56Three
26:58Two
27:00One
27:02Shots away!
27:04Shots away!
27:06One
27:16One
27:18One
27:20One
27:22One
27:24One
27:26Two
27:27One
27:28One
27:29Oh
27:49Thanks Gwen
27:59And you know what as well, Ollie, I don't think you did as terribly as you probably felt in that moment after watching that back. What do you feel now?
28:11I would have probably chose the small one. Ah, you would have chosen a different piece of paper. Yeah, it was very varied results
28:18I think was a bit of overkill to dress as a air traffic controller there, Mike
28:22But you get an outfit for your birthday, and you find it hard to work out when you can deploy it and it was my time
28:29Who got that for you? No, I won't go into that
28:33Now Gwen, how do you feel watching that back? It was it was you did a good throw there traumatizing
28:41Everyone got out the window and that is I'm saying nothing flew back in. No, I
28:47Only have one thing. Uh-huh. The task did not look like paper when we were doing it. It was card
28:53Okay, interesting since you said since in the task it said the first piece of paper
28:57Mm-hmm. Technically since the task is card that wouldn't count. Yes, but also technically a holy piece of paper wouldn't count either
29:06so I
29:08Uh, I can't believe I'm arguing with a child right now
29:12All right, so this is the question on everyone's lips. How far did those planes go Mike? I do have the measurements here
29:18So I'm afraid
29:19languishing the bottom was Gwen with her microplane which went
29:21uh, eighty two point five centimeters
29:24Syra'd make two meters and forty three centimeters Zach three meters fifty two centimeters
29:29Maisie a whopping four meters and twenty seven centimeters and Ollie despite being very down on himself
29:35Six meters and thirty one ten
29:37I
29:39I
29:41Okay, so one point to Queen for the microplane two points to Syra three points to Zach four points to Maisie, but the full five points goes to Ollie
29:50Oh
30:00I would be honored if you did another task. Thanks. Well the next task involves arguably humanity's greatest invention and presumably
30:08The object which inspired the wheel. I mean, of course the humble digestive biscuit
30:13Oh
30:27Hello, hello, Sarah. Hello, Ollie
30:29Hello, Gwen. Hello. How are you? I'm good. Thank you. How are you? I'm very well. Thank you. Hello, Maisie
30:36Hello, Zach. Hi. Take a seat
30:38Would you like to do a bit of small talk before we kick off or do you just want to crack on with the task?
30:45Oh, let's just get on with the task. I'm gonna take the task. Okay. I can't open it. Oh
30:50Do I just feel still? I think it's all about brute strength at this stage, Gwen
30:55Get the most digestive biscuits through a sieve. You have two minutes to plan and six minutes to complete the task. Your time starts now. Crush the biscuits
31:05What's your plan? I feel like crumbling it. Okay. I guess I'll just crush it. I'm assuming
31:14I could take them outside and drop a rock on them. They're all digestives. Okay
31:19Um
31:24It's gonna take forever, isn't it? It might do
31:33None of you seem to want to make small talk with Mike
31:36Why is that? Who can blame us?
31:38It might be rather suspicious of you, aren't they? It's lingering stuff, isn't it?
31:45A rock. Talk us through that, Zach. What are you thinking? Well, the first thing that came into my head was like pressure
31:51So just drop thing on thing, weaker thing, go boom
31:58Are there other problems that can be solved by dropping a rock on them?
32:01Uh, yeah
32:04enemies
32:06I think at the very end Maisie did say this is going to take forever
32:11Isn't it? I would love to see if it did Mike. Well, let's find out. Here is Syrah and here is Maisie
32:20How many do you think there are?
32:23About 127. How many are you going to try and get through, do you think?
32:2627
32:29Oh my gosh. These are harder to crush than I thought. Oh gosh.
32:33What's your target? What are you aiming for?
32:35Two
32:36Two?
32:37I don't know. Is that a lot?
32:39The vaulting ambition of youth
32:43How many do you think you've crushed through so far?
32:45Less than one
32:49Oh, I do like digestives
32:52Is that your favourite kind of biscuit?
32:53I don't think they're dead
32:56It's quite sinister
32:59Well, let's just say if you eat it, it's dead
33:03Right, it's okay
33:09You know what? I'm going to try a different
33:12Crushing several biscuits with my fist at the same time
33:15I do do a martial arts class
33:18Do you?
33:19Yes
33:19What do you do?
33:21Uh, Jiu Jitsu
33:22It's Japanese
33:23How far could you throw me, do you think?
33:25Um, 30, 40 centimetres
33:30Okay, that's quite good, I think
33:32Nine seconds left
33:33Oh gosh, it's all spilling out the sieve
33:35This is part of the sieve, can I just do that?
33:39Get it through the sieve
33:41Thank you, Maisie
33:45Do you know where I can wash my hands?
33:47I do, yes
33:48Yes, okay
33:50There's a lot of biscuits that are not quite dead yet
33:54A haunting idea to finish with
33:56Did any of the biscuits scream on the way through?
33:58Yeah, I guess
34:08You put your expectations low, both of you
34:10Zyra, you only wanted to get two biscuits through there?
34:13Right at the end, you had a different idea
34:15Well, I was noticing that they were all falling out of the sieve
34:18Which was just annoying me
34:19But I was like, well, you can't even tell what fell out
34:22And then it tipped through the little bit in the handle
34:26And I was like, oh, actually, that's still through the sieve
34:29It was a beautiful little idea
34:31But there was just simply no time
34:32No, no time
34:33You keep referring to the biscuits being dead?
34:36Um, well, if you are still in one piece, then I guess you're alive
34:41Ah, right
34:42So a biscuit in one piece is an alive biscuit
34:45That's terrifying
34:45Enough
34:47Either way, the biscuits, as far as you were concerned, were dead
34:51Very philosophical, Sire
34:53Amazing
34:53I understand that you're something of a philosopher as well, haven't you?
34:56Ah, yeah
34:57So imagine that there's this overlord being called, say, Bob
35:06Can Bob create a stone that he can't lift?
35:08If he can create the stone and he can't lift it, that's something Bob can't do
35:12If he can't create the stone, then that's another thing he can't do
35:16So it's impossible for people to actually be able to do anything
35:21Oh, so that's a sarcastic T-shirt
35:23And you've just been hit with a god paradox from a witch
35:28Who is this?
35:36Okay, well, here are Zach and Ollie
35:38Mmm
35:38To go to the shed
35:42Yeah
35:42What's that?
35:48Hamel
35:49Possibly a steak tenderiser?
35:51Yeah, it looks like a tenderiser
35:52Yeah
35:53This could work
35:54Yeah
35:55It's a blender
35:57A blender, we're blending, are we?
35:58Shall I operate it so you don't chop your hands off?
36:00Yes
36:01Can you get out of this for me?
36:03Certainly
36:03Right, where do you want this, Zach?
36:06There
36:08Okay, tell me what you're doing
36:10I'm going to break those biscuits
36:17Well, as many digesters as we can in there
36:19Yep
36:32A few more digesters put in there
36:36So you're tenderising the biscuits
36:38Yeah, it's a powder
36:41Yeah
36:42I'll put those in there
36:50Ten seconds left
36:52Yeah, put that in there
36:57I stopped
36:58Thank you, Ollie
37:00Thank you, Zach
37:01Okay
37:02Shall I tidy that up?
37:04If you want to
37:07Bye
37:08Bye
37:09Bye
37:09Bye
37:10APPLAUSE
37:11APPLAUSE
37:11Very impressive
37:16Okay
37:17Very similar ideas
37:18But different execution
37:20Why immediately the shed
37:21For both of you?
37:22Well
37:23Probably because it has useful tools
37:25I was looking more for like a sledgehammer
37:27Right
37:28Or
37:28Chainsaw
37:30It's strange that they aren't stocked, isn't it?
37:32On June and Castmaster
37:34Think about that for next time
37:35Thank you
37:36Ollie
37:36The blender did work
37:37I think making a dry smoothie out of digesters
37:39I think that would be a nightmare to be honest
37:41It could be hard to
37:43Digest
37:44Absolutely
37:45Even though it's called a digestive
37:46Very good point
37:47I'm an anti-digestive prank
37:49I think you both did very well there
37:53I'm excited to see the results
37:54But it is time for a short break now
37:57But what are you doing?
37:59Just having a little bit of me time
38:03We'll be right back
38:05Wow
38:18Welcome back to the final part of the show
38:20Look, we're nearly there
38:21So behave
38:21I said behave
38:23Leave your little sister alone
38:24Or so help me
38:25I'll turn the show around
38:26And drive us right back to the start
38:28Where do we leave off, Mike?
38:30Well, we've got one person left to see on this task
38:33And it is
38:34Gwen
38:35Right, so
38:37The obvious choice is to mush up the biscuits
38:42Get the most types of biscuits to the sieve
38:45Can I go to the shed?
38:46Certainly
38:49So what are we hoping to find in the shed, Gwen?
38:51I think I'm going to need
38:53this
38:54and this
38:56Elastic bands and scissors
38:57Yes
38:59That's interesting
39:02Okay, what's your plan, Gwen?
39:04My plan?
39:04Yes
39:05We don't need these elastic bands
39:06Oh
39:08I am going to label this sieve
39:11and push the biscuits through
39:13Creating a new sieve
39:16How many biscuits do you reckon you could get?
39:17Two stacks, maybe
39:21I'm not competitive in sport
39:23but maybe in other things
39:25I like to find loopholes
39:31Biscuit after biscuit after biscuit
39:33Biscuit after biscuit
39:39Thank you, Gwen
39:41Bye
39:42Bye
39:42Bye
39:51Very, very clever
39:53Now I could be very mean
39:54I mean it's hard to decide whether or not this is just ingenuity or a very cowardly loophole
39:59It didn't necessarily say it couldn't be a plastic bag labelled sieve
40:03It just said a sieve
40:05It could be that plastic bag's name is sieve
40:08Yeah
40:09It could have been a man called andrew sieve for example
40:12Yeah
40:13It doesn't have a birth certificate but i call it sieve
40:16It's quite a strong argument
40:17It is quite a strong argument
40:18If you label something something else it's not that thing
40:25She labelled a piece of tape sieve
40:28And put it through an elastic band wrapper thing
40:32That's not a sieve that's an elastic band wrapper thing
40:36I would argue that the tape that she actually wrote it on would be the sieve
40:40And she didn't fit through the tape
40:42Oh okay now we're getting into semantics now
40:44This is just getting honestly
40:46No you guys you honestly you sound like reddit
40:48Um so i'm not gonna i'm not gonna get into that
40:52I would love to just hear from mike how many biscuits they did all get through the sieve
40:56Okay calculated by weight maizey got 0.44 biscuits
41:01sarah got 4.44 yeah ollie managed 5.5 gzak 8.3 when a fairly whopping 85 biscuits
41:12right okay all right
41:16so what am i gonna do am i going to be evil am i going to be nice your head looks amazing
41:23oh no okay fine fine fine one point for maizey it's two points for syrah ollie three points
41:29four points for zach it's five points for gwen
41:34she takes the best way
41:36okay what has that done to the rankings there mike it's made it devilish close we've got maizey on
41:42nine syrah on 10 ollie on 12 zach on 13 and gwen on 15 points
41:47okay i want you a group of absolute scallywags to make your way over to the stage for the final task of the show
42:04ah hello hi mike hi who will be reading the task tonight gwen please oh yeah if i can open it
42:12do you want a hand yes please
42:24right
42:29here we go gwen write the names of all of your colors in different colors
42:33you must not write the name of a color in that color or use the same color twice
42:38every word must be legible and you must not remove your gloves most correct words in the correct
42:43colors wins you have a hundred seconds so you've got to write the names of all of those colors but
42:49you're not allowed to write the name of that color in its color okay no lids are to come off until the
42:55whistle is blown don't worry about the creeping sense of dread that's normal
42:59all right your time starts now
43:09okay
43:14get those lids off
43:17it's a different color to the lid
43:19amazing we have unearthed some skullduggery
43:23wait what was the lid
43:24do we have to put the lids back on i wouldn't bother with that maisie you've had 30 seconds already
43:38this is like art attack britty krueger vibes here
43:43come on guys you can do it
43:45come on guys
43:5210 seconds
44:00all right
44:05would you like to i would like to see the results of this dastardly task yes
44:08i would like to see the results of this
44:10sire
44:11hey pretty good not our fan
44:16gwen gwen again
44:19recognisable legible words i would say
44:23and here is maizey's offering
44:24hey yeah yeah
44:26i think it was left out there
44:29i'm going to say commendable some clear actual words
44:32thanks for colleagues
44:33i can see some words in there
44:37here you go
44:38we've got the thanks for coming as well
44:41it looks pretty close mike
44:44come back down here and we'll see how that's affected the final scores
44:54mike be a pal and taught me through that task fine work from everybody uh but in terms of actual
44:59numbers of words in different colors maizey got four ollie five zach seven sire and gwen drew with eight
45:11so points wise that means maizey gets one point ollie two zach three and sire and gwen both get five points
45:21mike can you please start with the final scores we are at the very height of exhilaration because the
45:27runner-up and the winner will be going through to the semis and we are dangerously close to finding out who
45:32they are are you ready rose you bet your bottom dollar i am then assume the position
45:38perfect
45:39yes i can tell you in fifth place with 10 points we have maizey give her a hand
45:50with 14 points in fourth place is ollie well done ollie
45:54with 15 points in third place is sire well inside
46:06with 16 points in second place and therefore through to the semis it is zach
46:10and then we are back
46:15and then we are going to be like let's go
46:16which means
46:17tonight's winner is gwen
46:26go on up and select your platterus of gifts
46:28right wow that's it for another week if you enjoyed the show please leave a review on trip advisor
46:32I don't hear it.