Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about some of the most common sex injuries and then hear from listeners about their own experiences getting hurt during the deed.
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00:00When people talk about the negative consequences of adult relationships, they're usually talking
00:08about STDs or relationship fallout, that kind of thing.
00:12But there's also the possibility of sustaining an injury while having sex.
00:18And a recent survey tried to figure out what was the most common sex-related injury.
00:25Okay, so it probably isn't the broken penis then, because, I mean, that does happen,
00:31but I bet it's something...
00:33Throwing out your back or something.
00:34Different.
00:34I bet it is, like back injuries or...
00:37More common in back is so common.
00:38You know.
00:39Injuries with that.
00:41Carpet burn.
00:42Oh.
00:42Oh, yeah.
00:43Yeah, old school.
00:45That hasn't happened in a while, huh?
00:48You don't see that much these days.
00:50That's still the number one most common sex-related injury.
00:54For anyone in between the ages of 20 and 35.
00:58Bruises.
00:59Number two most common sex-related injury.
01:02Yeah.
01:0354% of us have ended up bruised after a sex session.
01:07Pulled muscle.
01:09Yeah, so that'd be back, any kind of arm.
01:11Neck.
01:12Stiff neck.
01:13Stiff neck.
01:14See, to me, as a guy who carried some extra weight,
01:19it would be the holding myself up...
01:25So your arms would hurt?
01:26...to feel like I don't want to crush someone,
01:30and that can, especially for someone who's just...
01:33Shoulder problems?
01:34You have a shoulder problem.
01:36Be careful.
01:37I know.
01:39Oh, God.
01:39Ow, ow, ow.
01:41I'm sorry, but I can't.
01:43I'm going to have to be on the bottom.
01:46But, yeah, like, to me, like, that's a real...
01:51That's a real thing.
01:52Someone texted in to say they got a cramp in each calf
01:56and immediately went soft.
01:59Oh, oh, oh.
02:00The cramp calves.
02:02Yeah, the cramps in the calves.
02:04That's one of the worst pains.
02:05I've had that.
02:05Oh, my God.
02:05Imagine both of them.
02:06Usually it's just one, right?
02:07Usually it's one at the same time.
02:09Well, I think you're just dead.
02:10I mean, I think I'd just be...
02:12Are you okay?
02:12Are you okay?
02:14I'd just be out.
02:16Like, it's too much pain.
02:17Right?
02:18You just shut off.
02:18Yeah, just turn off.
02:20Someone said, I pulled a muscle in my tongue
02:23from going down on a lady too long.
02:25That's funny because that comes up here.
02:29Injury from receiving or giving oral.
02:31And I thought, okay, well, I can see guys getting injured
02:33receiving, you know, we've heard of horror stories.
02:37But giving oral to a lady,
02:39that's the only thing that could happen, right?
02:41I'm going to say this right now.
02:43I've never...
02:44Neck stuff?
02:45Oh, yeah, that's why he's brought up the neck.
02:47He keeps bringing up that neck.
02:52There was a few years ago I came here
02:54and couldn't move my neck.
02:55I thought nobody knew.
02:56And you guys were all like,
02:57man, you can't move your neck.
02:58Oh, no, like there's nothing...
03:00He didn't tell us oral.
03:00No, no, he didn't.
03:01No, he didn't.
03:02You stick with your basketball injury.
03:05Ah, too much oral.
03:06Yeah.
03:07I was just waiting for you to go to the air with it.
03:09Easy, Michael Douglas.
03:11Yeah, watch yourself.
03:13Yeah, watch yourself.
03:13Okay, so I've never had this happen during any kind of sexual thing,
03:17but it actually mostly happens if I yawn,
03:21but I will pull the muscle underneath my chin
03:25that opens your mouth up,
03:28and it will like force my mouth wide open,
03:32and it's one of the worst pains.
03:35And like once it happens,
03:36it can easily happen again
03:39until it kind of like heals or something in a weird way.
03:43I mean, I guess it could happen down there.
03:46Sure.
03:46It would be a really weird thing,
03:49but it's a lot of pain.
03:50It's a lot of pain.
03:51We're talking about the most common sex-related injuries,
03:54and you can share yours,
03:551-855-954-6969,
03:58as we head to voice-changing technology
04:00and Anonymous with us.
04:01Hi, Anonymous.
04:02So, my wife lost quite a bit of weight over the past year.
04:09Always had very good times in the bedroom.
04:12But since the weight loss about two, three times now,
04:15I've spent her into pain for weeks on end.
04:19Let's just say that I'm going too deep now.
04:21Yeah, like you had a little bit of cushion,
04:25and that cushion is gone,
04:28and now he's stabbing her in the lungs.
04:30Oh, my God, Jesus.
04:32Yeah.
04:33Must be a nice problem.
04:36Yeah, I thought it was a good thing,
04:38but now I'm kind of afraid.
04:40Well, it's not a good thing
04:41if she doesn't want to get it on with you.
04:43Well, no, that's what I mean.
04:44Be careful.
04:45You just got to, I guess,
04:46have a pillow between you or something.
04:48Or maybe, you know, put some kind of...
04:52Limiter on it?
04:52Yeah, I was thinking that.
04:55Some kind of, like, a donut?
04:56Some kind of donut?
04:57It's got, like, a hemorrhoid pad?
04:59Yeah, something.
05:01Need to get yourself a dick limiter, dude.
05:03Yeah, I can't relate to that.
05:06All right, all the best.
05:08Have a good day.
05:09Yeah, yeah.
05:09Your lady.
05:11My goodness.
05:12Yeah, she's the governor.
05:14That's it, right?
05:14She had more cushion.
05:15You know that it's like a toy
05:18where it's, like, rings.
05:22Yes.
05:22They're, like, the multicolored rings.
05:23You just got to put a couple of them on there.
05:26Someone said,
05:26lifted a bigger girl
05:28and fell backwards.
05:30I just envisioned that.
05:33You got to know your limits.
05:37Oh, you got to know your limits.
05:41Because you're trying to be hot or whatever.
05:42Oh, you are, yeah.
05:44I'm so erotic.
05:46Awkwardly tearing my ACL in the process.
05:49Ooh.
05:50Not a football injury.
05:51Oh, my God.
05:52His knee just gave way.
05:54Like when Hulk Hogan slammed Yokozuna.
05:55Oh, my God.
05:58Yep.
05:59What?
06:00It's so bad.
06:01Oh, my goodness.
06:02It's, like, the worst way
06:03to describe a sexual encounter.
06:05Hulk Hogan.
06:06Hulk Hogan slammed Yokozuna.
06:09I mean, he did try
06:10and fell right back on himself, didn't he?
06:12Yeah.
06:12It wasn't all the way.
06:13No.
06:14Listen to this weird one.
06:16Dated a rock climber for a bit.
06:19During an extreme orgasm,
06:22he crushed my hand.
06:23Oh, because he's so strong.
06:25Right.
06:25His hands are so strong.
06:27Oh!
06:28Wow.
06:29Two surgeries.
06:30Two surgeries.
06:31Oh, my God.
06:32And six months
06:33without full use of my left hand, she says.
06:35Six months.
06:37Yeah.
06:38Yeah.
06:39But think about it.
06:40They are able to hold themselves up
06:42with, like, two fingers.
06:43Right, yes.
06:44On a rock face.
06:44So he's got incredibly strong hands.
06:46Oh, yeah.
06:46And when he finales,
06:47look the hell out.
06:49I think that could traumatize you with sex.
06:53Like, having sex in the future.
06:54Oh, you'd be so...
06:55Oh, yeah, yeah.
06:56Like, someone would try and hold your hand
06:58or grab your hand or something.
07:00Don't touch me.
07:00Be gentle.
07:02Get out of here.
07:04I'm like, trust me,
07:04I have no power in my hands.
07:06I've only pushed buttons.
07:09Little hands.
07:10Yeah, look,
07:10let me squeeze you as hard as I can.
07:12Buttons.
07:12Do you even feel it?
07:13Do you even feel that squeeze?
07:15You don't, do you?
07:16These are the tiny hands of a button pusher.
07:18Don't worry.
07:19I push buttons for a living.
07:21These hands have never done anything hard.
07:25Just lightly slide a fader.
07:27Yeah, exactly.
07:28I push up a tiny little pot.
07:31Don't worry, my lady.
07:32Gentle as can be.
07:34I could never hurt you with these.
07:35Yep.
07:35I've tried to kill a fly
07:38and it's not worked.
07:42All right.
07:43I'm going to head back to the phones here.
07:44We're talking about your sex-related injury
07:47that you've gone through
07:49on a regular line, I believe.
07:51We have Anonymous.
07:52Hi, Anonymous.
07:54Hi.
07:54What happened?
07:56So,
07:57me and my boyfriend at the time
07:59were having sex
08:01and I was on top
08:03and I ended up
08:05flipping a little bit
08:07and it bent.
08:09Oh, yeah.
08:12But it also pulled down the foreskin.
08:15What?
08:16And, um...
08:18Ripped it right off?
08:19Yeah.
08:20He ended up needing to go get a circumcision.
08:23Oh, my God.
08:24You circumcised a guy.
08:26Yeah, he was de-sleeved.
08:27What is that?
08:28De-gloved.
08:28De-gloved.
08:29Shut it, shut it.
08:30Don't ever.
08:31I hate that word.
08:31De-gloved.
08:32I hate that word.
08:33He was de-gloved.
08:33Okay!
08:34Yeah.
08:36I mean,
08:37when they gotta rush you in
08:38and then put it all...
08:40And you weren't burned as a witch afterwards?
08:42Oh, yeah.
08:42It's Salem.
08:44They should.
08:45They definitely should.
08:46Yep.
08:46Oh, God.
08:47That would have been a horrible thing.
08:48I don't know how you react to that
08:49because you're so thankful
08:50that you just had a lady on top of you.
08:52I think it turns pretty quick.
08:54Oh, my God.
08:54But dang it!
08:55Yeah.
08:55Dang it!
08:57I think I'd say a few more choice words
08:58than dang it.
08:59I don't think anyone's ready
09:00to be de-gloved?
09:03To see a de-gloved situation.
09:05No, no, no, no.
09:05Not the horrifying.
09:07No, of course not.
09:08No, like, I'm off.
09:09You feel so bad.
09:10If I'm gonna turn off
09:11because my leg got a cramp,
09:14if I'm just gonna pass out from that,
09:16de-gloving,
09:17it's on you now.
09:18Yeah.
09:19You are the one
09:19who has to call all the authorities.
09:21Mm-mm.
09:21I'm asleep.
09:22Mm-mm.
09:23My brain turned off.
09:25Bop.