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00:00La la, na, La la, la la la, La, la, la, la la, la, la la, La, la la, la, la la la la
00:30Oh,
00:32Mother of God, if it'd only make up its mind.
00:52Wait till you hear this, lads.
00:53Valley refused to cough up cup.
00:56What's that about?
00:56despite appeals for its return
00:59by no less a personage than Councillor Willie Power
01:02the Power Cup remains in Bally
01:04What's the Power Cup?
01:06It's the holy grail of golf trophies
01:08It was the prize for the killing of Scully Open
01:10having been donated by Willie Power's grandfather
01:12in 1917
01:14and played every year after that up to 1933
01:17What happened in 1933?
01:19Connie Conway from Bally
01:20was in the clubhouse on 600
01:22and taught he had the trophy in the bag
01:24until along came...
01:25Finted Flaherty
01:26Finted Flaherty
01:27from the Cooning Road below
01:28Well Finted was after playing out of his skin
01:31and he was striding down the 18th fairway
01:33on 5 under
01:34and he was just about to take his second shot
01:36with all to play for
01:37when his caddy...
01:38Bags Cosgrove?
01:40Bags Cosgrove was struck by lightning
01:41Zap! Top of the head
01:447,000 volts of lightning
01:45lit him up like a Christmas tree
01:47Was he alright?
01:51Yeah, Lou!
01:52Was he alright?
01:54Should have they never found him?
01:55So all that was left was
01:56a pair of shoes full of ashes
01:57and I was smoldering skin
01:59and the smell of burnt ratchets
02:00Wow!
02:01Finted Flaherty
02:02threw down his clubs
02:04and never played again
02:05Never played again
02:07Now to the general opinion
02:08that the Open should have been cancelled
02:10in the mark
02:10respect to Bags that year
02:12but
02:13Connie Conway
02:14From Bally
02:15From Bally
02:16Insisted that he was the winner
02:18and faked off with the Power Club
02:19and to this day
02:20it sits
02:21in a glass case
02:22in the pub in Bally
02:23Well Willie Power wants it back
02:24He does
02:26for his new golf club
02:27Cheers!
02:29Mother of God
02:30I wouldn't serve him
02:33if I were you, Jackson
02:34Are you alright?
02:36What does it look like?
02:38We should do something
02:39I'm not going near him
02:40In the bag
02:41The bag
02:43He better speak up
02:45In the bag of what?
02:46His bag
02:47There's something in his bag
02:49Pills maybe
02:50Go on, Jimmy
02:51In the bag
02:52A bag
02:54We should mix the whole grain cereal
03:01There's a cereal killer out there
03:03Other side
03:04Other side
03:05He's dying, Jackson
03:06He's talking about going to the other side
03:08Mother of God
03:09The other side
03:11of the cardboard
03:13It's a map
03:15Some class of a treasure map
03:17Here, give it to me
03:18Whatever happens
03:21You mustn't let the Ballyboys
03:23Get their filthy hands on there
03:27What's this map got to do with the Ballyboys?
03:37The Ballyboys have been trying to get that treasure for years
03:41Whatever you do
03:44Don't let them
03:47With regard, I think he's dead
03:49He could have at least bought something
03:52Well, well, well
03:56If it isn't the Three Stooges, huh?
03:59There's no welcome here now for Ballyboys
04:01Looters
04:02There's no map
04:05Did this fella have a map?
04:07No
04:07No
04:07Vic
04:08Alright, grab that
04:09Are you sure he didn't have a map?
04:13No
04:13Vic
04:15Jacksie, what are you doing?
04:22I'm ringing Sergeant Dick
04:24Dan, a fella died there right in front of our eyes
04:27I saw nothing
04:28What about you, Jimmy?
04:30No, I saw nothing
04:31Jimmy?
04:32Oh, er
04:33A fella with a bag
04:34Staggered in
04:35And then he keeled over and died
04:36And then the Ballyboys arrived in
04:38And they asked us if we'd seen a map
04:39And we said, no, we hadn't
04:41And they picked up the dead fella
04:42And they fecked her off
04:43No, no
04:45I saw nothing
04:47Those fecking idiots
05:01How's Dan?
05:15Sheila
05:16What have you got there?
05:17No, not Sheila
05:17Come on, come on
05:18Stop, stop
05:19Sheila, stop
05:20How are you?
05:21Hello
05:22How are you, fella?
05:24Dan, nurse
05:24Maloney, father
05:26Maloney
05:26He's just after getting off
05:27You could say that, father, yes
05:30I'll be seeing you
05:33Okay
05:33What have you there, Dan?
05:36Nothing, fella
05:36Just an old Weedabix box
05:38Oh, right, yeah
05:39I'm usually of usually
05:41What?
05:42I'm usually of loosely
05:44I normally have muesli
05:47In that gas
05:48Easy for you to say
05:49Good luck, fella
05:50It's not that easy
05:52I usually have muesli
05:53It's very hard
05:54Dan was up all night with the map
05:59He's it all figured out
06:00It's a map of Hooligan's Hollow
06:02Over beyond my Ganny Cross
06:04How did he work that out?
06:05Tis written on it
06:06Hooligan's Hollow?
06:09Is that not where
06:09Willie Power's new golf course is?
06:11Tis
06:11Tell me about the ball
06:13Oh, yeah
06:13Willie asked us to make
06:15A giant golf ball
06:16For the grand opening tomorrow
06:17Oh, there's great excitement
06:19It's the world's
06:21First ever
06:2214-hole golf course
06:2314-hole golf course
06:26A 14-hole golf course?
06:28Yes
06:28Why 14?
06:3013 would be unlucky
06:3144
06:3645
06:3746
06:3947
06:4048
06:41East
06:44East
06:46East
06:50East
06:52East
06:52East
06:53East
07:21East
07:22East
07:23Ah!
07:24Ah!
07:25Ah!
07:26Ah!
07:30Ah!
07:34Ah!
07:53Fix it!
08:04What the thick?
08:05What the thick?
08:22I'm sorry.
08:23Hold up.
08:24I'll have to take this.
08:26Hello?
08:29This is not a good time, love.
08:30I'm, uh...
08:31I'm in the middle of a battle.
08:34I'm up to my eyes and infidel.
08:36Stop! Stop! Stop!
08:41Flynn, how many feckin' times have I to tell you
08:45to leave the mobile at home?
08:48Last week, at the Battle of Killuni...
08:51Two phone calls!
08:53Two phone calls.
08:54And the week before that...
08:56The Battle of Akrams.
08:57The Battle of Akrams.
08:59Two phone calls.
09:01Three!
09:01Three phone calls.
09:04I'm sorry.
09:04That's it.
09:05I've had enough of you.
09:07Next week, you're a peasant.
09:11Larry, come on.
09:13Who am I?
09:16Who am I?
09:19Galahad.
09:20Sir Galahad.
09:22You're always Sir Galahad, you are.
09:24Correct.
09:27And next week, you're a peasant.
09:31A peasant.
09:34Ah, well, you can shove your own reenactment up your codpiece.
09:37I'm off to the pub.
09:38Yeah?
09:39Well, next week, I'm Spartacus.
09:43I'm Spartacus.
09:44I'm Spartacus.
09:45I'm Spartacus.
09:47Hello?
09:48Hello?
09:48Stand up!
09:50Lads!
09:51What are you doing?
09:54You're letting me down, lads.
09:57Will you put the feckin' things away and come back here?
10:04A porthole.
10:05A porthole?
10:07What class of a porthole?
10:08A porthole into another dimension.
10:11Look, all I know is, you go into one hole, and when you come out of another hole, you're
10:15into a whole other century, and this map is the key to the whole thing.
10:18Holy God.
10:20It's a lot of holes.
10:21What did you see again, Dad?
10:23A full-scale battle.
10:24There was smoke and fellas fencing and shouting and arms and legs being chopped off everywhere.
10:29Just like being in Bali on a Saturday night, outside the kebabs of your uncle.
10:32But what about the treasure?
10:33It's obvious, isn't it?
10:35You have to go into the past to get the treasure.
10:37It's a crusade.
10:39I know I didn't get it today, but we'll get it tomorrow when we go back.
10:42We?
10:43Yeah.
10:44The two of you are coming with me.
10:45Oh, can do.
10:46Because me and Timmy have to deliver our ball tomorrow morning.
10:49What ball?
10:51The big golf ball we made for the new golf course.
10:54Yeah.
10:54You go play with your big balls.
10:56Some of us have a crusade to go on.
10:58Where you going?
10:59Where do you think?
11:00Oh, go forth and strain nine spuds.
11:02Zer den.
11:06Go on, Jaxie.
11:09And for fix acres, finish the aftergreens.
11:14Sorry, Willie.
11:20Bloody power walkers.
11:25Has to be here somewhere.
11:28What's this here?
11:29The tree.
11:30What's that over there?
11:31That's a piece of dust.
11:34East.
11:36East.
11:41Fickin' rain.
11:44Fair play, lads.
11:44That looks great.
11:45Well, do you want it, Willie?
11:46Did you make the tea?
11:47No, shall we eat a cup of coffee before we left?
11:49No, you're supposed to make a giant glove tea for that to go on.
11:52Really?
11:53For God's sake, can you not get anything right?
11:55Go on, bring it up there beside the marquee.
11:57Father God.
12:20Mother of God!
12:50I call you!
12:52I call you Galer, I'm going to use the distinguished guests,
12:56Reverend Fathers, ladies and gentlemen.
12:59The Kilnes Gully Golf Club Leisure Centre Spare and Tanning Centre
13:04shows that we are capable of thinking outside the inside of the box.
13:10I would also like to thank the Minister and his wife for...
13:17Despite having a huge handicap...
13:21...he always manages to fit us in.
13:27As many holes as possible!
13:50Wow!
13:53Yes!
13:56Now, without further ado, to tee off for the first time a man who can drive a ball further than I go on my holidays...
14:02...the designer of our course, Jose Alaba...
14:05...Ala...
14:06...Ala...
14:07...Ala...
14:08...Ala...
14:09...Ala...
14:10...Ala...
14:11...Buenas years, muchas gracias.
14:14The Grins, they are very close, no?
14:16Yeah, yeah, hoping to expand next year.
14:19Ah, si.
14:21Si.
14:23Crazy gringo.
14:24Pshew!
14:25Oh!
14:26Ooh!
14:27Oh!
14:28Oh, oh...
14:29WiFi man!
14:32Ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:45Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:46Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:48More! More!
14:50More!
14:52For fix sake!
14:54Run for it!
15:05Oh, for fix sake!
15:11Sorry about that, folks.
15:13I'm sure it'll be second time looking for Jose L.A.L.A.L.A.L.A.S.
15:16Off you go, Jose.
15:17Muchas gracias, muchas gracias.
15:25Fix sake!
15:38The hall!
15:39Yes!
15:47Hello?
15:50Willy, Dick here.
15:52I've been through every file in the place and I can find nothing about the power cup.
15:57Now, the Bally boys could well have it, but without evidence, there's nothing they can do.
16:03Evidence?
16:04When did you learn that word?
16:06Look, I want that cup back.
16:08Then I don't care how you get it, right?
16:12Sorry about that, Jose.
16:14Off you go.
16:15Off you go.
16:32In the hall!
16:33Yeah!
16:34Yeah!
16:35Jose!
16:36Jose!
16:37Jose!
16:38Jose!
16:39Jose!
16:40Jose!
16:41Jose!
16:42It's only plastic.
16:43I know it's only plastic.
16:44I know it's only plastic.
16:45And the paint comes off.
16:46My hand is destroyed.
16:47Goldfinger.
16:48Da da, da!
16:49Da da!
16:50I know it's only plastic.
16:51I know it's only plastic.
16:52And the paint comes off, my hand has destroyed!
16:56Goldfinger.
16:57Da da da!
16:59Is the den, the den with the Midas touch, such a coil—
17:04Jimmy?
17:05What does that map say?
17:06Danger treasure map.
17:07Now what does it say?
17:08Den trap!
17:13I think this map is a fake.
17:15What are you, Nick?
17:16The dead fella, the cave, the fake map, the plastic statue.
17:22They were all just tricks to make Dan look like a complete fa...
17:25Okay, Timmy, we get the picture.
17:27But who'd have done such a thing?
17:29The Bally Boys.
17:31The Bally Boys.
17:33The Fackers.
17:36Come on!
17:37Where are we going?
17:38We're gonna get our own back.
17:40How?
17:41We're gonna get back the Holy Grail.
17:43The Power Cup.
17:45We're gonna steal it back from the Bally Boys.
17:47And give it to Willy Power.
17:48Good man than Dan.
17:50Dan's the man.
17:51Damn right he is.
17:53You know what makes a fool out of Dan, Clancy.
18:05Anyway, out he comes out a hole in the ground.
18:08With that plastic statue in his fist dripping gold paint.
18:15I love it when a plan comes together.
18:20Wait, wait, wait.
18:21It gets better.
18:22It gets better.
18:23He staggles across the green.
18:24And gets clumbered in the head, be a golf ball!
18:30Hey!
18:31But that wasn't in the plan, though.
18:33No, no, no.
18:37Come here, come here.
18:38What night is it?
18:40Thursday night.
18:41No, I mean a man.
18:42What night?
18:44Oh, he's one of them real actor fellas.
18:47He's been here since Tuesday.
18:53Well, you can't beat that.
18:55What?
18:56A night on the tiles.
18:57Here, give us a hand lifting him into the back room.
19:03He can sleep enough on the pool table.
19:06You grab his legs.
19:09One, two, three.
19:10I hope this doesn't give him nightmares.
19:17Why me?
19:18Because Jimmy's got to push the ball and I've got to go in and get the cup.
19:21Look, all you've got to do is go in, pull the string, drop it and run.
19:24In, pull, drop, run.
19:27Pull, in, drop, run.
19:31Go on.
19:42Where is everybody?
19:48Well, there's no one there.
19:49What do you mean there's no one there?
19:51Should the belly biser always propping up the bairn?
19:53I'll cause.
19:55I'm telling you, there's no one there.
19:56Let's go home.
19:57Go in, wait till they're there, pull the string, drop it and run.
20:01Pull the string, drop it and run.
20:05Go on.
20:08Drop it and run.
20:10Drop it and run.
20:12Well, that's a good night from me.
20:13And a good night from...
20:15Jimmy Higgins, what brings you to belly?
20:17What brings you to belly?
20:18Drop it, run, pull it.
20:20What?
20:21Run it, pull it, drop.
20:23What's it going on about?
20:25Drop it, pull.
20:26Ah!
20:30Well.
20:32Well.
20:37What is it?
20:38What is it?
20:39I've no idea.
20:40Oh.
20:48Well, did you do it?
20:49Leave me alone.
20:50You didn't do it.
20:51You looter.
20:52All you had to do was pull it, drop it and run.
20:57Take your cunts off it!
20:59Will you just let me look at it?
21:02No!
21:03Hey!
21:04You looter.
21:05You're after breaking it.
21:06No, I didn't.
21:07Ah!
21:08Ah!
21:09Fuck you, lad.
21:13What do we do now?
21:14How'd affect I know?
21:16Look.
21:17What's the story, lads?
21:18The smoking band hasn't reached belly yet.
21:19Heath!
21:20Let go!
21:21You can roll it there, Calais.
21:22Ha!
21:23Ha!
21:24Ha!
21:25Ha!
21:26Ha!
21:27Ha!
21:28Ha!
21:29Ha!
21:30Ha!
21:31Ha!
21:32Ha!
21:33Ha!
21:34Ha!
21:35Ha!
21:36Ha!
21:37Ha!
21:38Ha!
21:39Ha!
21:40Ha!
21:41Ha!
21:42Ha!
21:43Ha!
21:44Ha!
21:45Ha!
21:46What?
21:47Good luck.
21:48I don't need luck.
21:52Ha!
21:53Ah!
21:54F**king stools.
21:55Oh!
21:56Ah!
21:57Ah!
21:58Oh!
21:59Ah!
22:00Ah!
22:01Oh!
22:02Ah!
22:03Ah!
22:04F**king stools!
22:05Ah!
22:06Ha!
22:07Ah!
22:08I hate feckin' snakes.
22:26Ah, another feckin' porthole!
22:28Peasants, I'll give you a peasant!
22:31Ah, peasant!
22:33Ah, peasant!
22:53The Powell Cup!
22:57Good night.
22:59I got it! I got it! I got it!
23:03Yay!
23:09Shite, they're comin' back!
23:11Start the engines! Start the engines!
23:15They won't start! They won't start!
23:26Now that is good!
23:30Woo!
23:33It's the Powell Cup, all right, lads.
23:35It's great to have it back.
23:36That'll have a great home now in the Killing the Scully Golf Club.
23:39Leisure, spa...
23:40And tannin' centre.
23:42Exactly, yeah.
23:43Where's then?
23:44Temple of Doom.
23:46Where?
23:47Strain the Spuds.
23:48Oh, right. Here, Jacksy.
23:49Will you give him that from me when he gets out?
23:51Will do.
23:53And what about us?
23:54After all the damage he did with that large ball.
23:56You're lucky he didn't ring Sergeant Dick.
23:58Here.
23:59I better go back to the golf club before that.
24:00I'll...
24:01I'll...
24:02Jose drinks me out of the house in the home.
24:04See you, lads.
24:05See you, Willy.
24:06See you, Willy.
24:07See you, Willy.
24:14You just missed Willy.
24:15He took the cup.
24:16He left a tenner for you and 40 yo-yos for drink.
24:19A tenner.
24:20The tight loother.
24:21I suppose I can't complain.
24:22There's a tenner more than you boys got.
24:24Hello.
24:25Hello, Willy.
24:26It's Dick.
24:27Hello, how are you?
24:28Hello.
24:29Hello.
24:30Hello, Willy.
24:31It's Dick.
24:32Hello, Dick.
24:33How are you?
24:34Hello.
24:35Hello.
24:36Hello.
24:37Hello.
24:38Hello.
24:39I've lost you.
24:40No.
24:41Willy.
24:42Oh.
24:43Hello.
24:44Willy.
24:45Oh.
24:46Hello.
24:47Oh, Dick.
24:48Yeah.
24:49Do you still need help?
24:50No, I'm all right.
24:51I'm sorted.
24:52Dan led a raiding party over to Bally.
24:53And the upshot is the power cover's back where it belongs.
24:55Brilliant.
24:56Yes.
24:57Fair choice to the lads.
24:58One second, Dick.
25:01Run you back there, Dick.
25:02Right, Willy.
25:09Ah, Vic!
25:10Jimmy!
25:11Jimmy!
25:12Jimmy!
25:18I know.
25:19You see.
25:21You see.
25:22High forty.
25:23Oh.
25:24Yes.
25:25meine house.
25:26And you have a big head of the estamos here.
25:27Oh, no, I can't even help.
25:28Ah, you know, me is a huge head, but I know.
25:30I can't even help.
25:31No.
25:32Do you remember if I sit?
25:33No, it's not a king.
25:35I can't even help.
25:37No, I can't even help.
25:38No, I can't even help.
25:39It's a holy man.
25:40No, you've been a king me.
25:42No, you've got anyá»±c.
25:43No, you haven't come.
25:44No, no, I can't even help.