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  • 2 days ago
Frasier Season 4 Episode 21 Daphne Hates Sher Ry

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📺
TV
Transcript
00:00Good morning, sunshine.
00:04Good morning, Jack.
00:06Coffee's on. Want a cuppa?
00:08No, thank you. Caffeine only weakens the immune system. I'm fighting off a flu.
00:13Oh, I'm sorry. Let me get you some breakfast.
00:16No, no, no. That's really not necessary.
00:18Oh, no, no. You'll feel much better once you've had my scrambled egg tacos and spam patties.
00:24In keeping with the trusty adage, starve a cold, disgust a fever.
00:32Tea and dry toast?
00:34Oh, bless you.
00:42Oh, honey, I was using that.
00:44Oh, sorry.
00:46Oh, well, no problem. Listen, why don't you just relax? I'll clean up later.
00:52You know, not to criticize, but I usually serve Mr. Crane whole grain cereal for breakfast.
01:00I try to avoid giving him fried food.
01:02Oh, Marty loves fried foods.
01:04Yes, well, just because he likes something doesn't mean it's good for him.
01:09True, but just because something's good for him doesn't mean that he has to be stuck with it day after day.
01:17Oh, looks like it's gonna be another scorcher.
01:23Mm-hmm.
01:25Radio said high 90s.
01:28Yes, it's hot.
01:30Yeah, well, I guess there'll be some more brown outs.
01:34Hate to think of what it's gonna do to the crops.
01:36Yeah, please. I'm trying to read.
01:38Oh, sure. Sorry.
01:40Oh, double homicide last night.
01:45Yeah, with this heat wave, though, I'm not surprised.
01:50Yeah, I wonder what started that.
01:52Perhaps someone wouldn't stop talking about the weather.
01:54No?
01:57Yeah, you might be right.
01:59It's a real scorcher out there.
02:01Morning, handsome.
02:05Oh, hey.
02:06Did I say that before?
02:08Before and after.
02:14Please, would you two spare me the single entendre this morning?
02:18Trying to avoid getting sick.
02:20Well, there's nothing like one of Mama's big biscuits if you're fighting something off.
02:25Yes.
02:26Sure with good Amy could bring down an elk.
02:31How about you, sweetie?
02:32Oh, just half a womb for me.
02:34Oh, come on.
02:36Wouldn't hurt you to put on a few pounds.
02:39Men like to see a little oomph in your walk away.
02:42Yeah, you ought to see them smile when Sherry leaves the room.
02:46I can imagine.
02:48Oh, now, you're so pretty, I don't understand why men aren't just buzzing around you.
02:59Frasier, you're not seeing anybody.
03:03Here you are, under the same roof, both cute as corn.
03:07Why don't you just...
03:08Look, just stop right there.
03:10I'm trying to have a peaceful morning.
03:12I do not want to be put on the spot.
03:14I do not want to eat some bizarre breakfast concoction.
03:17And I do not want to discuss the weather.
03:20I just want to try to conserve energy.
03:22Sit here and enjoy my paper.
03:24Sure, Frasier.
03:44Hold on!
03:45Hold on!
03:46Get rid of it!
03:47You can't!
03:48You're gonna break every vote in your bad little body!
04:02If you weren't a girl and I didn't kinda like this, I'd be pounding you!
04:06I don't care who did what to whom or in what disgusting manner we speak hordes of viral
04:21visigoths are hurting themselves over the battlements of my immune system laying waste
04:25to my oh dear god you see how weak I am I can't even finish a simple visigoth metaphor
04:36yo if you get sick don't go sneezing and everything the last time the happy chef had a cold I was
04:41picking lettuce off the mic for a week you will not what I meant what I said simply cannot deal
04:51with other people's problems today well good news for mark on line three whose wife is keeping a
04:57pumpkin in a bassinet hey I know what will make you feel better my friend Lisa's having a singles
05:09party tonight I'm supposed to bring someone I'm not interested in but who's a really good catch
05:13oh god Ross please I need my rest no even if I didn't I do not want to be poked and prodded by
05:18a bunch of desperate alcohol lubricated husband hunters oh come on it'll be fun Cheryl from
05:25sales was asking if you'd be there Cheryl isn't she the one who at the last company wedding hip
05:30checked you into the ice sculpture in a headlong rush to catch the bouquet that is not what happened
05:36she thought the bartender said last call
05:40look Ross I'm not gonna fight anymore but I want you to know you said a lot of things that really
05:49hurt my feelings fun is fun but I'm not made of stone so I want you to know I said this moment
05:54we work together but we are no longer friends you want to go to a party tonight I'm there
06:00ready to do your exercise oh in a minute just a couple more hands you said that half an hour ago
06:18guess I must be a bad influence next thing you know you gotta have me smoking behind the gym
06:23I'm sorry but it's for your own good I want you down on your back in two minutes and no arguments
06:33sounds a lot better when you say it
06:35hello
06:43speaking
06:45oh she did did she
06:49well Sherry was mistaken I don't go out with people I've never met thank you anyway
06:56I can't believe it you gave my number to a total stranger
07:01I thought it would be a nice surprise you're not seeing anybody Kenny is a great guy he said
07:08his name was Jack oh I forgot about Jack there's more than one well I hope you're a lot nicer to
07:17Kenny when he calls he has a boat why don't you just squeeze me into a pair of hot pants and drop me
07:25off down by the docks
07:44maybe you wouldn't be so touchy if you didn't wake up on the wrong side of no one every morning
07:49that's your answer to everything sex it's like a part rabbit people ought to rub your feet for luck
07:56come on now you don't want to say anything you're gonna regret now you're acting like a couple of fishwives
08:04see I'm regretting that one already
08:07maybe I'd be less touchy if I hadn't spent half the day cleaning up after you
08:13and the other half on the phone with the garbage disposal repairman
08:17because one of your bloody big biscuits broke the blade
08:20that's a lot of b words for a little girl
08:25here's one you forgot
08:27is Seattle experiencing a Prozac shortage
08:40Daphne and Sherry are having a little problem actually maybe you can settle it
08:48I'm sorry dad it was all I could do to get through my show
08:50King Solomon has split his last baby for the day my health is hanging by a thread
08:56you're just gonna have to settle this amongst yourselves
09:02quietly
09:03you've got a lot of nerve talking to me that way
09:08me you're the one who started it didn't she Martin
09:11hey you're not putting me in the middle of this
09:13I didn't start anything
09:14you've had your big conk in my business all day
09:18that better mean nose
09:20and what if it doesn't
09:21knock it off
09:24now I said I didn't want to get involved in this but
09:29Daphne
09:31you know I'm sure he was only trying to be nice
09:35of course you take her side
09:37she's the one who keeps your hammer toes warm at night
09:41what the hell's that supposed to be
09:42oh figure it out
09:44oh come on dad
09:46oh come on dad
09:55baby go to your perch go to your perch
10:15Daphne
10:23Daphne
10:23I'm so sorry to bother you Dr. Crane
10:27but I had an awful row with Sherry and I can't go back there
10:31I tried a couple of my girlfriends but they weren't home
10:34so
10:35may I spend the night here
10:38relax Dr. Crane
10:51I'm just unbuttoning your shirt
10:54moment
10:56are you feeling any better
11:03um
11:04yes
11:06I don't know what happened
11:08my knees never buckled like that before
11:10the
11:11wine and the heat must have made me dizzy
11:14it is rather steamy in here
11:17I apologize for the lack of air conditioning
11:20it seems in order to
11:22live in an exclusive landmark building
11:25one
11:25must be willing to sweat through the odd heat wave
11:28like a tortured character in a Tennessee Williams play
11:31I can't imagine what you must be thinking
11:36me barging in asking to spend the night
11:40well
11:41gee I'm just thinking so many things
11:45Sherry just makes me so mad
11:50she's been giving my number to strange men
11:53so they'll call and ask me out
11:55how dare she
11:57why would she do such a thing
11:58because she says I'm too rigid
12:00nonsense
12:02and that I'm too picky
12:04poppycock
12:05and that I'd be much happier if I
12:07just went out and had sex with someone
12:10just to play devil's advocate
12:20don't tell me you agree with her
12:25no
12:25no
12:26it's much too hot for hell to have frozen over
12:28I mean it's like caveman thinking
12:31all Daphne needs is a quick roll in the hay
12:34yes
12:35well
12:36a little slap and tickle would solve all her problems
12:40you know
12:41the worst part is
12:44I think she might be right
12:47maybe part of why I got so mad at her is
12:54because she hit a nerve
12:57it's very possible
13:00I mean I have been keeping myself on the shelf lately
13:05I'm feeling a little like the good China
13:09someone should be eating off you every day
13:25music
13:26I hope this doesn't sound terribly forward but
13:38I'm so hot
13:41I'd really love to get out of these sweaty clothes
13:46would it be alright if I took a cool bath
13:55yes
13:56yes of course
13:57it's upstairs
13:58a third door on your lap
14:00thank you
14:01there are fresh towels in the linen closet
14:03use the Indian cotton
14:06it'll be more gentle on your skin
14:08oh
14:08Dr. Crane
14:09you're always thinking of me
14:12you have no idea
14:17Dr. Crane
14:39oh that fan feels good
14:42oh dear
14:49sorry about the fan
14:51that's quite alright
14:53thanks for lending me your dressing gown
14:57don't you just love the feel of silk on your skin
15:00oh yes there's nothing quite like it
15:03passion fruit
15:05thank you
15:09you know if you keep treating me like this
15:12I'll never want to leave
15:13champagne
15:15you shouldn't have
15:19I love champagne but it's a drink for two and I
15:24never have anyone to share it with
15:26yes
15:27there are things you miss when you're on your own
15:30champagne
15:31another person's touch
15:35even if it's just holding hands
15:38I guess you've been missing that sort of thing too
15:44since you and Mrs. Crane split up
15:47well actually Maris never held hands
15:49she had a slight webbing
15:50that made herself conscious
15:51well
15:58I'm sure there are other intimacies you miss
16:03naturally I
16:07still have a longing for
16:09I just have a desire
16:13to have
16:14fruits
16:14sex
16:15pardon
16:16I mean
16:18yes thanks
16:19I'd love some
16:20I mean fruit
16:23oh no
16:28sex is good too
16:29I'm sorry Dr. Crane
16:38I guess I just have sex on the mind tonight
16:41well
16:43well that happens
16:47this weather doesn't help does it
16:52ah
16:54the heat gets inside you
16:58it makes you so aware of your body
17:01it's like nature's way of
17:07letting you know you're still an animal
17:10God it's hot in here
17:18getting hotter every minute
17:25ice
17:26ice
17:26yes I could use some right now
17:29oh
17:32oh yes
17:35oh
17:35oh that's better
17:37where's your piece
17:42Melton
17:48get another
17:51oh
17:52you know unless it cools down
17:59I'm afraid we won't be getting much sleep tonight
18:03shame we have just the one fan
18:09oh really
18:12yes that is a shame
18:16the two of us
18:18and just one fan
18:20well of course you're the host
18:24you take it
18:25no no no
18:26I couldn't sleep at all
18:27knowing you were in the next room
18:29all
18:29hot
18:30hot
18:34well
18:38I suppose under the circumstances
18:41we could both sleep in the same room
18:46it does
18:50oscillate
18:52what
18:58the fan
19:01oh
19:04oh dear
19:08what
19:09it's time to take my pills
19:12I forgot all about them
19:13they're back at the apartment
19:14what pills
19:16it's my thyroid
19:18nothing serious
19:19just a bit overactive
19:20if I don't take my pills
19:22I tend to faint dead away
19:24what's the point of having a fainting couch
19:26if you can't use it once in a while
19:27I'll just run over and get them
19:30I'll come right back
19:31no
19:32we'll go together
19:34and I'll run up for you
19:36if you and Sherry get in the same room together
19:38the two of you might make up
19:39more reasons to fight with one another
19:42well you did the best you could
19:58you know
19:58you didn't really
19:58I know
20:00but I suppose I shouldn't have gotten on it so hard
20:02but she just made me so angry
20:04I know
20:05I mean
20:06you're true
20:07that's right too
20:08we don't know much privacy either
20:10but I think Kenny is the perfect person
20:13Kenny would be great
20:14don't you think so
20:15Nilesie
20:17where did you come from
20:20what are you doing here
20:22Daphne's
20:23taking refuge at my apartment for the night
20:25I just stopped by to get a few of her things
20:27back
20:28you weren't going to tell us
20:30you were just going to let us worry all night
20:32no I was going to tell you on my way out
20:34oh this is stupid
20:35I'm going to call her and get her back here
20:36we're going to work this thing all out
20:38is that it's a waste of time
20:39she's so upset
20:40there's no way she will ever set foot in this apartment tonight
20:42if you don't believe me you can ask her yourself
20:46I just remembered
20:51my pills aren't in the medicine cabinet
20:53they're on the dresser
20:54what courage pulling yourself together like this
20:57just scurry on down to the car
20:58and I'll only be a moment
20:59Daphne
21:00Sherry and I talked
21:03and we really feel bad about this
21:05you know the whole thing is just a misunderstanding
21:08if you want
21:09I suppose we could
21:10sit down and talk it out
21:13well
21:14I suppose we could
21:17obviously these two wildcats
21:19can't come to terms
21:20the best thing will be for them to be apart
21:24I know I'm a psychiatrist
21:26no no no
21:27your dad is right
21:28now Daphne just misunderstood
21:31I didn't exactly misunderstand
21:34you did set me up with a total stranger
21:37oh but he's not a stranger
21:39he comes in the bar all the time
21:41oh a bar fly
21:43much better
21:44oh there you go again
21:46me?
21:47you know
21:47oh you know
21:48you two are really a lot alike
21:50oh
21:51I am nothing like that
21:52I can't say that
21:54walk amongst ourselves
21:55I mean all I was trying to do
21:58he's probably an alcoholic
22:00he's not an alcoholic
22:02you think I would let you go out with a
22:04oh honey
22:05you're a bitch
22:06that's what you are
22:07breaker
22:09I'm taking a bath
22:13bubbles
22:17they're aromatherapeutic
22:21and exactly what part of
22:23I'm taking a bath
22:24did you take to mean
22:25come on in
22:26well
22:27I'm sorry to tax your delicate system
22:29but Daphne's back
22:31and she and Sherry are at it again
22:33and now she says she's gonna stay overnight with Niles
22:36and I don't know what to do
22:37and this is your department
22:38all right
22:38unless blood has been spilled
22:40and on a carpeted area
22:41I don't care
22:42now get out
22:42oh
22:43there you are
22:44Marty I tried
22:45but that girl has no manners whatsoever
22:48hey Frasier
22:50do you mind
22:51I knew I'd find you in here
22:53whatever they're telling you about me
22:55is not true
22:56Daphne thinks you can't come in here
22:57why not
22:58she can't
22:59no she can't
23:00no one can
23:01Frasier have you no decency
23:02Daphne let's go
23:03all right
23:04I am moments away from succumbing
23:06once and for all
23:07to this
23:07but I will take
23:08one stab
23:10at this
23:11and then I am going to sink
23:12the epipodomous light
23:13beneath the bubbles
23:14I think what this all comes down to
23:18is a dispute over turf
23:20Daphne and Sherry are like
23:22two animals
23:23set marking their territory
23:24which in this case is you
23:25Jack
23:25you couldn't come up with
23:26a less disgusting comparison
23:29all right fine
23:29it's like the Roman Emperor
23:31Tiberius
23:31his mother Livia
23:33and his wife Vitsania
23:34what
23:35huh
23:35go on
23:37hi
23:39Daphne
23:41your primary role
23:43in this household
23:44is to take care of dad
23:46Jerry
23:47you also enjoy
23:49taking care of dad
23:51I suspect
23:51that your
23:52attempts to find
23:53Daphne
23:54a boyfriend
23:55are really an unconscious
23:56ploy to get her out of the way
23:58it's unconscious
23:59Daphne
24:00Ashley
24:02you're threatened by this
24:03you feel that you're
24:04no longer needed
24:05I have been feeling
24:07a bit unwanted lately
24:09oh well
24:10a night without your services
24:11we'll have them singing
24:12a different tune
24:13let's go
24:13yes not
24:14no one is going to be singing
24:15anything tonight
24:16all right
24:16but Daphne
24:18I think we now
24:23all understand
24:24why you
24:25you stormed out
24:26of here earlier
24:27strong emotion
24:28like not feeling
24:29want
24:29can drive anyone
24:31to a rash
24:32and impulsive act
24:33yes it nearly did
24:35I mean
24:37yes it did
24:38yes well
24:40at the root of this
24:41you're both just
24:43feeling insecure
24:44exactly
24:46it very possibly
24:51could have been avoided
24:52if dad had been
24:53sensitive enough
24:54to remind you
24:55that you're both
24:56important in his life
24:57what are you saying
24:58that it's my fault
24:59well I must admit
25:00it's a few
25:01reassuring words
25:02might just have
25:03done the trick
25:04Marty does have
25:05difficulty expressing
25:06his feelings
25:07no I don't
25:09oh Sharon
25:11oh save it
25:12honey
25:12it wasn't our fault
25:14yes it was
25:15you said that
25:16she was skinny
25:17and you said
25:17she was big mouth
25:18that is not important
25:20we all feel better now
25:22well I don't
25:23well
25:23all right look
25:24I am running out
25:25of patience
25:26I am running out
25:26of strength
25:27and I am running
25:28out of bubbles
25:29please
25:30the lecture
25:31has ended
25:32you're a good
25:35psychiatrist
25:35Dr. Craig
25:36you sure are
25:38hon
25:38you see Marty
25:40it isn't just
25:41a lot of hooey
25:42thank you very much
25:45oh
25:45please Niles
25:49look
25:50unconsciously
25:51you knew
25:51that it wasn't
25:52right
25:52that's why
25:53you brought
25:53Daphne back
25:54here
25:54no
25:55we came back
25:56to fetch
25:57her damn
25:57thyroid pills
25:59you're a doctor
26:01why didn't you
26:02just use your
26:02prescription pad
26:03oh my god
26:12isn't there
26:14an all night pharmacy
26:15across the street
26:16from your building
26:17oh my god
26:21hey baby I hear the blues
26:39are calling
26:40tossed salads
26:41and scrambled eggs
26:43mercy
26:45and maybe I seem
26:47a bit confused
26:49well maybe
26:49but I got you pegged
26:52ha ha ha ha
26:54but I don't know
26:56what to do
26:57with those tossed salads
26:58and scrambled eggs
27:00they're calling again
27:03goodnight everybody
27:06goodnight
27:08goodnight
27:09goodnight
27:09goodnight
27:10goodnight
27:11goodnight
27:12goodnight
27:13goodnight
27:14goodnight
27:16goodnight
27:17goodnight
27:18goodnight
27:19goodnight
27:20goodnight
27:21goodnight
27:22goodnight
27:23goodnight
27:24goodnight
27:25goodnight
27:26goodnight
27:27goodnight
27:28goodnight
27:29goodnight
27:30goodnight
27:31goodnight