• 5 months ago
Transcript
00:00We're absolutely sure we won't follow, aren't we, Jeeves?
00:03Quite sure, sir.
00:04No sinister-looking fellows with hats pulled down over their eyes lurking around the customs shed?
00:08Only the customs officers, sir.
00:11Good Lord, Jeeves. Look at the size of that boat.
00:14I think the crew will be grateful if you refer to it as a ship, sir.
00:17Really? Touchy about that, are they?
00:19The vessel has, after all, a gross displacement of 43,450 imperial tons, sir.
00:23And the turbines allow him 52,000 shaft horsepower at the touch of a beaver, sir.
00:29Oh, well, well.
00:30Added to it, sir, she draws 38 foot in the water and is capable of maintaining a steady speed...
00:34Yes, I think that's enough about the technical side of things, Jeeves.
00:37Very good, sir.
00:39Your stateroom, sir.
00:41Ah. Thank you.
00:44I say, Jeeves, this is something like what?
00:48You approve, sir?
00:49I should jolly well think I do approve, yes.
00:51There's just one thing. Where do I sleep?
00:53In here, sir.
00:55Good Lord, Jeeves.
00:57I thought it was going to be some sort of cupboard affair...
00:59with you having to clamber up onto the top bunk.
01:01The poor people do travel in such a style, I believe, sir.
01:11Now, Jeeves, let us make sure that we have not overlooked any conceivable danger.
01:14Our daggers can't possibly trace us now, can she?
01:16I should have thought it extremely unlikely, sir.
01:18Unlikely isn't good enough.
01:20Not when she's pursuing the brandishing of Noria Glossop...
01:22and demanding marriage with menaces.
01:24If Mrs. Gregson asks at the club...
01:26she will be told that we are in Scotland, sir.
01:28Good, good.
01:30I thought my last hour had come when Noria won me in that raffle.
01:32Miss Glossop did appear to take the terms...
01:34of what was essentially a mere game of hazard...
01:36rather literally, sir.
01:38Yes. Most girls who come to the Drone's Dance...
01:40are perfectly happy with a peck on the cheek...
01:42and a bottle of Bollinger, but not Noria.
01:44Pardon me, sir, but this article...
01:46appears to have found its way into our luggage.
01:48Yes. Rather snappy, isn't it?
01:50I bought it at Bates.
01:52I am surprised, sir.
01:54Oh, come off it, Jeeves.
01:56I told them I was going to New York...
01:58and they came up with the goods.
02:00No mention was made of a carnival...
02:02or fancy dress occasion, sir?
02:04Jeeves, it's a perfectly good hat.
02:06I shall be the Beau Brummel of Broadway.
02:08Of course, it is a great honor...
02:10for me to command such a magnificent ship.
02:12Ah, oui.
02:14Oh, you speak French, Monsieur Boustan.
02:16C'est extraordinaire, ces jours-ci...
02:18de trouver un Anglais qui parle une autre langue.
02:20Ah, oui.
02:26That's a blessing.
02:28It's a blessing.
02:30It's a blessing.
02:32It's a blessing.
02:34It's a blessing.
02:36That's Percy Boustan.
02:44Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça?
02:46Hello, hello, hello.
02:48Bertie!
02:50This is not the sort of behavior we allow on this ship.
02:52Who's the chap in the fancy dress?
02:54He's the captain.
02:56Nice fellow. Speaks very good French.
02:58Look, I'm terribly sorry, senor.
03:00Kale from Mars and all that.
03:02That'll hold him.
03:04So, Bertie, what are you doing here?
03:06Likewise, old fisky.
03:08Just business, you know.
03:10Business?
03:12Don't say you've broken the habit of a lifetime...
03:14and actually found a job up here.
03:16No, I'll tell you what it is.
03:18You know how your Aunt Delia is always on about me...
03:20working and earning a living...
03:22and being able to support Anne...
03:24after we get married and all that sort of stuff.
03:26Yes, well, answer like that, of course.
03:28I was saying to Jeeves the other day...
03:30Well, I met this fellow at the bottled oyster...
03:32and he had a wonderful American car of his.
03:34Well, of course, I know quite a bit about cars...
03:36so I went outside to take a look.
03:38And he was right. An absolute corker.
03:40Look.
03:42Very snazzy.
03:44It is, isn't it?
03:46It's called a spritz polecat, apparently.
03:48Just look at those chromium-plated pipe things sticking out of the front.
03:50Yes, well, as a matter of fact...
03:52Anyway, there were a couple of us there...
03:54Barney, Yuffie, Prosser, Bingo, Ronnie Fish, all the usual crowd...
03:56and they were climbing all over him...
03:58asking where they could get one for half well.
04:00And I thought to myself, hello.
04:02Anyway, to cut a long story short...
04:04I send a cable to the man who makes them...
04:06and I'm going to meet him in New York...
04:08and become the sole importer of these desirable motors.
04:10There's a fortune in it, Bertie.
04:12Don't you have to buy these cars before you sell them?
04:14Oh, that's the clever bit, you see.
04:16Barney's given me the money to get him one...
04:18and he's agreed, well, sort of...
04:20that I can use it to show prospective customers...
04:22for a week or two and get some more orders.
04:24So, you're just going to buy the one car?
04:26Ha!
04:30Ha!
04:42I wish to see Mr. Worcester.
04:44Who should I say?
04:46I'm Lady Morwen. This is my son.
04:48What ho, what ho, what ho.
04:50Oh, you're Mr. Worcester.
04:52That's the chap.
04:54I was surprised to see your name on the purses list.
04:56Your auntie told me that you were in Scotland.
04:58Yes, this is meant to be a surprise.
05:00Ah, well, now, look, this is my son, Wilmot.
05:02What ho, Wilmot?
05:04Hello.
05:06I think you two are going to be great chums.
05:08Oh, rather.
05:10I shall be busy on my book...
05:12for most of the trip, so I shall rely on you...
05:14to keep young Wilmot out of mischief.
05:16He's a strict vegetarian...
05:18and a detotler, and is devoted to reading.
05:20Give him a nice book...
05:22and he'll be quite contented.
05:24Thank you so much.
05:54Thank you.
06:24You've heard of limpets, Jeeves?
06:26The gastropod mollusk of the genus Patella...
06:28noted for adhering tightly to rocks, sir.
06:30Exactly, Jeeves.
06:32Well, this blasted persol seems to be noted...
06:34for adhering tightly to worcesters.
06:36I can't get rid of the blighter...
06:38just as I'm about to click with some toothsome filly.
06:40Up pops Motty Persol to enliven proceedings...
06:42by standing at my elbow like a wet weekend in Chalfont St. Giles.
06:44Perhaps it is for the best, sir.
06:46Shipboard romances are notoriously transient.
06:48I don't need Motty to protect me from heartbreak, Jeeves.
06:50Let me learn from my own mistakes, say I.
06:52I am willing to sacrifice myself...
06:54for a most commendable attitude, sir.
07:02Oh, my Lord.
07:04You haven't met Wilmot Persol, have you?
07:06Is this mother that woman that spent the weekend in Rio...
07:08and wrote that book Wither Brazil?
07:10That's the one.
07:12Watteau, Motty? Watteau, Bertie.
07:14Have you met Tuppy Glossop? Watteau, Tuppy.
07:16Watteau. Mother doesn't like me saying that.
07:18What? Watteau.
07:20She doesn't like me whistling either.
07:22Really?
07:24Or putting my hands in my pockets.
07:26I say, Motty, isn't it way past your bedtime?
07:28Yes, I know.
07:30I was just going now.
07:34Pip, pip.
07:42He's also a Tito club.
07:44Good Lord.
07:46Still, one more day and I'll be off my hands.
07:50Well, there you are, Jeeves.
07:52The land of the free and the home of the brave.
07:54Indeed, sir.
07:56Also the land of prohibition, sir.
07:58Prohibition, Jeeves?
08:00You mean this system they've got of not being allowed to get a snoopful?
08:02Indeed, sir.
08:04Although I'm given to understand that certain subterfuges are used...
08:06which ensure that ardent spirits...
08:08are more readily available than hitherto.
08:10She's a fair size, Jeeves.
08:12Indeed, sir.
08:14Puts one in mind of a Noria Glossop in that white dress she wears.
08:16She's a fair size, Jeeves.
08:18Puts one in mind of a Noria Glossop in that white dress she wears.
08:20The similarity is a striking one, sir.
08:22The similarity is a striking one, sir.
08:24Now, Jeeves, why do you think they built all these tall buildings?
08:26Now, Jeeves, why do you think they built all these tall buildings?
08:28Well, sir, it was partly because of the restricted size of Manhattan Island...
08:30Well, sir, it was partly because of the restricted size of Manhattan Island...
08:32and partly because the island is solid granite...
08:34and partly because the island is solid granite...
08:36and therefore capable of supporting such structures.
08:38Nothing to do with having got the plans sideways, then?
08:40No, sir.
08:42That's what Barney told me.
08:48That's what Barney told me.
09:00If you'll pardon me for saying so, sir...
09:02Mr. Funky Phipps is not noted for his architectural expertise.
09:04Mr. Funky Phipps is not noted for his architectural expertise.
09:06Oh, Jeeves, true.
09:08Apartment 51, please.
09:10Apartment 51, please.
09:12Mr. Worcester is the new tenant there...
09:14and I'm his manservant, Jeeves.
09:16Apartment 51 it is.
09:18You gentlemen got some visitors.
09:20There you are, you see, Jeeves?
09:22The natives are friendly. A welcoming party already.
09:24You his what?
09:26His manservant. His gentleman's personal gentleman.
09:28He's valid.
09:30What kind of dough you get for a job like that?
09:32I'm not at liberty to divulge that information.
09:34I can only say that the remuneration is ample.
09:36I can only say that the remuneration is ample.
09:38Thank you.
09:42Remuneration? Divulge?
09:44Remuneration? Divulge?
09:48Where on earth have you been, Mr. Worcester?
09:50We disembarked an hour and a half ago.
09:52Ah, yes, well, we had to fetch the key from the agent.
09:54It really is most inconvenient.
09:56I've got a train to catch in less than an hour.
09:58A train?
10:00Where will Wilmot sleep?
10:02Sleep?
10:08Oh, no. South facing.
10:10No, Wilmot can't have too much sun.
10:12What do you mean, exactly sleep?
10:16I'm staying here.
10:18No, you're not. Why can't you go with your mother?
10:20I get fearfully sick on trains.
10:22Or a hotel.
10:24Oh, no, no.
10:26Wilmot is essentially a home bird, aren't you, my darling?
10:28Yes, Mother.
10:30Yes, but not my home.
10:32Your Aunt Agatha was most anxious
10:34to get in touch with you, Mr. Worcester.
10:36No.
10:38There was talk of a young girl dreadfully wronged.
10:40Wronged? No, no, no.
10:42All that happened was...
10:44Tethered to, dear Wilmot has been sheltered
10:46from the temptations of a great city.
10:48It's such a relief to know that he'll be safe with you,
10:50Mr. Worcester.
10:52I shall rely on you.
10:54Now, I simply must go.
10:56It is essential that I catch the eleven o'clock train.
10:58I have to visit Sing Sing,
11:00and I'm terribly interested in prison conditions.
11:02And then I'm going to work my way
11:04across to the West Coast,
11:06visiting points of interest on my journey.
11:08It'll be no more than two weeks.
11:10Two weeks?
11:12Two weeks will be ample.
11:14America from within.
11:16Isn't that a grand title, Mr. Worcester?
11:18Well, yes, it is.
11:20Now you're going to be a good boy, aren't you, Wilmot?
11:22Yes, Mother.
11:24And remember, I shall have to rely on you
11:26for most of my information about New York,
11:28so don't forget to take notes of your impressions.
11:30It's such a help. Goodbye, my darling.
11:32Bye, Mr. Worcester.
11:38So, I'm left in charge of the pill.
11:40Pill?
11:42Partial.
11:44The expressions, Wilmot.
11:46A gin and tonic or scotch for soda?
11:48Scotch, I think.
11:50You know, this prohibition's not at all a bad thing, you know.
11:52I never really liked afternoon tea before.
11:54Oh, do buck up, Tubby.
11:56Well, I'm nervous.
11:58You'll be nervous again if I don't.
12:00Oh, I'm sorry.
12:02I'm sorry.
12:04I'm sorry.
12:06Well, I'm nervous.
12:08You'll be nervous again if you meet a total stranger tomorrow
12:10and have to try and persuade him you're an expert on cars.
12:12Well, you were an expert on cars.
12:14Yes, well, I know a fair bit.
12:16Um, look, ask me another question.
12:18You're not going to learn anything from a boy's book of the automobile.
12:20It's the only thing I could find.
12:22Go on, Percy.
12:24All right.
12:26Automobiles get thirsty, just like you and me.
12:28What do most automobiles most like to drink?
12:32I don't understand that.
12:34Petrol, you fathead.
12:36Oh, yes, of course.
12:38Ha!
12:40Yes, well, I hate those trick questions.
12:42Mr. Stoker's not going to ask me trick questions, is he?
12:44Stoker?
12:46What, J. Washburn Stoker, by any chance?
12:48Yes, that's the chap.
12:50Do you know him?
12:52I shall say I do. I was engaged to his daughter.
12:54Really? Well, what happened?
12:56J. Washburn Stoker happened.
12:58If there's one thing in this life I do not relish,
13:00it's running into J. Washburn Stoker again.
13:02Roar!
13:04Roar,
13:06old Lion City!
13:08Roar!
13:10Roar,
13:12my
13:14half-formed city!
13:16Wait a minute.
13:18Don't I know you?
13:20Yes, it's...
13:22Bertie Worcester, yes.
13:24You're Rocky Todd, the poet, aren't you?
13:26We met at Buffy Bingham's birthday in London.
13:28Buffy Bingham?
13:30Yes, not to be confused with Beefy Bingham,
13:32who's his brother, but you could easily tell them apart
13:34because Beefy wears his collar back to front,
13:36unlike Buffy. Well, anything but.
13:38I remember.
13:40We went to that really great club of yours.
13:42That's right, and this is Tuffy Glossop.
13:44You met him there, too.
13:46Yes, I was the one with the firework in my hat.
13:48Oh, sure, Tuffy, sure. Hey, this is great.
13:50I thought you never came to New York.
13:52Oh, this is the first time in six months.
13:54I just came to visit my publisher.
13:56Well, why don't we all go and get some dinner?
13:58Great idea.
14:00Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute, wait a minute.
14:02Din.
14:04Din of the city.
14:08City without pity.
14:12This is good.
14:14This is good.
14:16This is good.
14:42Hello, James. Good morning, sir.
14:44It's ghastly, is it?
14:46Lord Pershaw ran out of money, is it?
14:48And the establishment responsible
14:50was holding him hostage for the bill.
14:52Good Lord, he's a nurse. What's the matter with him?
14:54Does he have some sort of dashed fit or something?
14:56Jeeves, someone's been feeding him meat.
14:58Sir?
15:00He's a vegetarian, you know.
15:02He's probably been digging into a steak or something.
15:04Well, fetch a doctor.
15:06I hardly think that will be necessary, is it?
15:08Oh, Jeeves, you don't think he's under the sauce, do you?
15:10I fear so, sir.
15:14Good Lord, Jeeves.
15:16What would his mother say?
15:18One does not like to contemplate it, sir.
15:44Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.
15:48So, how are you doing, Mr. Glossop?
15:50Oh, hello there.
15:52Are you Mr. Stoker?
15:54I sure am.
15:56So, you want to sell my little
15:58stretch pole cat in England, do you?
16:00Yes.
16:02Well, what I'd like to do...
16:04You know, my daughter's going to marry an Englishman.
16:06I don't suppose you know him.
16:08No, I don't suppose I do.
16:10His name's Lord Chuffnell of Chuffnell Regis.
16:12Chuffnell Rangers. Yes, well, um, I do know Chuffy. Ah, now, um, I'm sure you've noticed,
16:18Mr. Stoker, but they've put your steering wheel on the wrong side. Now, I'll tell you right off,
16:25Mr. Gossip, I don't intend to make a special model with a right-hand drive.
16:31Right-hand drive? I got my production line running and I don't intend to disrupt it.
16:36Well, that is until you start to sell a thousand cars a week. Right-hand drive, eh? Why do you keep
16:40saying right-hand drive? Oh, nothing, nothing, just, um, mulling it over, you know. You want
16:46the steering wheel and the gas pedal and the brake on the right-hand side of the car.
16:51Oh, oh, I see. Daddy, I was just on my way to Bloomingdale's. Oh, hello, honey. This is, uh,
17:01Mr. Gossip. He's, uh, he's English. Uh, this is my daughter, Pauline, that I was telling you about.
17:08How do you do, Mr. Gossip? Are you over here on business?
17:22Ah, what, oh, Bertie. Top of the old truth. How did it go with old man Stoker? Ah, pretty well,
17:26I think. I was fairly impressed, though I do say so myself. I say, Bertie, what a wonderful girl
17:33she is. Who is? Pauline Stoker, of course. She's just the sort of girl I ought to marry, you know.
17:40Tuppy, she's engaged to Chuffey Chuffnell. Yeah, she mentioned something about that.
17:44I don't think it's, um, oof, no, no, I don't think it's serious. My dear old Tuppy, one cannot just
17:48ignore the fact that a girl is engaged to be married to a chubbler. What's more, a fellow
17:51drone. Oh, can't one just? Mother asses, you're engaged to my cousin Angela. I'm disappointed,
17:59Worcester. A gentleman would not have mentioned that.
18:07Ah, geez, any sign of young Motty yet? Lord Pershaw is awake, sir, and in good spirits.
18:12Is he, by Jove? I'm preparing a luncheon, sir. Lord Pershaw expressed a desire for sustenance
18:18not entirely satisfied by porridge, scrambled eggs, five rashes of bacon, mushrooms, toast,
18:23and marmalade. Good Lord, Jesus, a man must have a constitution of a yak. Precisely the ruminant I
18:28had in mind, sir. Come in. Ah, what ho, Motty? What ho, Bertie? You, uh, ate something last night that
18:41disagreed with you, did you? No, nothing of the kind. I drank too much. Much too much. Lots and
18:48lots too much. Once more, I'm going to do it again. I'm going to do it every night. Yes, yes, right.
18:55You see, the thing is, Motty, I'm sort of responsible for you, so to speak, and if you carry on like this,
18:59I'm liable to end up neck deep in the soup with your mother. Oh, I can't help your troubles, old
19:03thing. This is the first time in my life I've had the chance to yield to the temptations of a great
19:08city. Well, yes, but Motty, don't you think? All my bloody life I've been cooped up in the ancestral home
19:14in much middle fold in Shropshire. Until you've been cooped up in much middle fold in Shropshire,
19:19you don't know what cooping is. This is my only chance to assemble a disreputable past.
19:25And I'm going to take it.
19:29You think you've chucked every principle of a well-spent boyhood and got it right up his nose?
19:33It is often the way, sir, when the shackles of familial piety have been loosened. I can see
19:37nothing for it, Jeeves. I shall have to stick with him. Try and keep the gaiety under some sort of
19:40control. Very good, sir. Lord Pershaw is dressing now, sir. He seems anxious to get out as he puts
19:47on the tile. Oh, good grief. Jeeves, hats then. Very good, sir. No, Jeeves, my American hat.
19:54Very good, sir.
20:04Yeah, doesn't look at all bad, does it? A violin case would complete the effect very
20:08creditably, sir. All right, Jeeves, we shall say no more about it. I think the hat looks fairly
20:13doggy. You are not convinced of its dogginess. We will agree to differ. Now, what has little
20:16Pershaw got planned for today, do you know? What do you want?
20:22Well, I get a chance at your showcase.
20:41Sure is kind of late to be coming home, sir. Ah, yes, well, you know how it is.
20:46No, sir, I don't, Mr. Worcester. Praise be, I don't.
21:17My, uh, my friend is suffering from an unfortunate attack of food poisoning.
21:20Did I say anything, sir?
21:23Oh, Jeeves, this is getting a bit thick. Indeed, sir. I can't take much more of this, Jeeves.
21:50It is hard, sir.
21:54I can hear music, Jeeves. Of a kind, sir.
21:57Lord Pershaw informed me that he brought home a few friends last night.
22:16Jeeves, there's a dog in there. That will be Rollo, sir.
22:19His lordship informed me that he purchased the animal from a Norwegian seaman.
22:24He tried to bite me.
22:25No doubt, in time, the creature will learn to distinguish your peculiar scent, sir.
22:29What do you mean, my peculiar scent, Jeeves? I do not intend to hang about in my bedroom
22:32while life slips by, in the hope that one of these days,
22:35some dreaded animal decides that I smell all right.
22:37Very good, sir.
22:41Jeeves, I've decided. I'm going away this afternoon by the next train.
22:44You remember Mr. Todd, Jeeves? No, sir.
22:47Yes, you do, Jeeves. Very good, sir.
22:49He's a poet.
22:50Anyway, I met him again the other night with Tuffy,
22:52and he invited me to go and stay with him at Long Island,
22:54so that's what I'm going to do.
22:55I'm going to get some peace and quiet if it's the last thing I do.
22:58So you'd better get along to Western Union,
23:00send him a telegram warning him to put the fatted calf on gas mark six.
23:04Very good, sir.
23:05Do you wish me to accompany you, sir?
23:08I think not, Jeeves.
23:08You'd better stay behind to ensure that Motty doesn't burn down the old homestead.
23:12As you wish, sir.
23:19Yeah!
23:25So, how do you like my little country estate here, Mr. Glossop?
23:29Little?
23:30I wouldn't call it little.
23:32I mean, well, you've got everything.
23:33Swimming pool, a tennis court, stables.
23:36Well, you know, we like to keep ourselves busy.
23:40Now then, I think it's about time that we get down to
23:43the nuts and bolts of your little business venture.
23:46Not so little, Daddy.
23:47If Hildebrand's going to be the sole importer of the pulled calf.
23:51Maybe and maybe not.
23:54What size order were you thinking of as of here and now, Hildebrand?
23:58Size of order?
24:00Ah, uh, well, um...
24:02Hildebrand obviously hasn't come all this way just to buy one or two cars, Daddy.
24:06Sure, sure, sure.
24:08How many?
24:09Well, um, well, obviously, not just, um...
24:12Well, they, um, they come cheaper by the dozen, I suppose.
24:16Like eggs.
24:17Well, obviously, the more cars you buy, the better deal you get.
24:22Well, let's start off with four.
24:26Four?
24:28Four dozen, Daddy.
24:30Ah, quite.
24:33Quite.
24:35Four dozen.
24:47Where's the house? I haven't seen a light for 20 minutes.
24:59Up the track there.
25:01Is it far?
25:02Just to the end of the track.
25:04Good night.
25:46Oh, man.
26:05Who's there?
26:09Do you know what time it is?
26:10Almost supper time.
26:1220 past eight.
26:13Oh, my God.
26:15Uh, well, this is a bit awkward.
26:17I, uh, I sent you a telegram.
26:18Uh, it was still in your mailbox.
26:27Who is that?
26:28Bertie Worcester.
26:29Bertie!
26:30Ho, ho!
26:31Hey, how you doing?
26:33Stay a week?
26:34Stay a month?
26:34Have a drink?
26:35Oh, I have to drink, but I can only stay a week if that's all right.
26:37Peace and quiet, Rocky.
26:38That's what I crave.
26:39Fine, fine.
26:40That's great.
26:41Come on in.
26:43Oh, nice to see you.
26:44Oh?
27:07Please.
27:09We're just going out for a while.
27:12Okay.
27:13Very good.
27:14Hello.
27:35Operator?
27:36Get me the police.
29:14Okay.
29:28Well, hey, Rocky.
29:30Oh, hi, Bertie.
29:31Enjoying yourself?
29:32Oh, fantastic, yes.
29:34Sure.
29:35Nice and quiet around here.
29:37Wonderful.
29:38Wonderful.
29:40So, Rocky, what else does one do for excitement around here?
29:43Excitement?
29:46You ought to be here in the winter.
29:49We get pretty high winds around here in the winter.
29:52Blowing the snow off the trees.
29:54Blowing the...
29:56Oh, I don't know at all.
29:58Good lord.
30:01Bertie!
30:03Toppy!
30:04What on earth are you doing here?
30:05Well, I rang your flat.
30:06Chief told me you were here.
30:08I'm staying at the Stoker's place up the road.
30:10Bertie, I need your help.
30:14Four dozen?
30:16Or 48?
30:17What else could I do?
30:18Believe me, Rocky.
30:19Her eyes shining.
30:21What have her eyes got to do with it?
30:23Look, I couldn't just order one car.
30:25I'd look such a fool.
30:26You'd look an even bigger fool when you had to tell old man Stoker
30:28that come to think of it, you don't want 47 of them after all, thank you very much.
30:32But I can't, Bertie.
30:33It's too late.
30:34Too late? Why?
30:36I'll tell you later.
30:38Yes, yes.
30:39This will do, driver.
30:40Thank you.
30:43The problem is, Bertie,
30:46I gave Stoker a cheque.
30:48For how much for?
30:49Get down! Get down!
30:58Oh, Pauline!
31:00Isn't she wonderful, Bertie?
31:02How much was the cheque for, Toppy?
31:05Fifty-seven thousand dollars.
31:07Fifty-seven thousand dollars?
31:11That's about ten thousand pounds.
31:13I know that.
31:14Ten thousand, two hundred and three pounds, fourteen shillings and four pence.
31:18Get down! Get down!
31:20Oh, now, I'm not a bloody mole, you know.
31:22No, I know that.
31:23You can see the house from here.
31:25Very nice.
31:27Now, that's my room.
31:28Second floor, one, two, three, yes.
31:30Three along from the left.
31:31Why don't you put an X underneath it?
31:34Now, we're all going to be out at dinner this evening,
31:36so the house will be empty.
31:39If you think I'm going to risk my neck
31:41breaking into Jay Washburn Stoker's house
31:42to steal back your dratted cheque,
31:44then you are suffering from one of the more dramatic forms of brain fever.
31:47The last time I had any social contact with Stoker,
31:49he was going to kick my trousers up through my hat.
31:52And then I hadn't even thought of burgling his house.
31:53I was only engaged to his daughter.
31:55Bertie, it couldn't be simpler.
31:58Now, I'll keep my window open.
32:00I know how to turn off the burglar alarm.
32:03And it's a servant's night off.
32:05Ha, ha!
32:06Couldn't be simpler.
32:11Oh, I forgot my hat.
32:22I forgot my hat.
32:33Ha, ha!
32:35I forgot my hat.
33:05Ha, ha!
33:21Ha, ha!
33:43Darn it, Pauline.
33:44I forgot to turn on the burglar alarm.
33:46Oh, Daddy, you didn't.
33:47Ah, we'd better go back.
33:49We can't.
33:50We're late already.
33:51There aren't any burglars in West Neck anyway.
33:53Keep going.
33:54Yes, ma'am.
34:19Did you miss me?
34:50Ha, ha!
34:54Ha, ha!
34:56Ha, ha!
34:58Ha, ha!
35:00Ha, ha!
35:02Ha, ha!
35:04Ha, ha!
35:06Ha, ha!
35:08Ha, ha!
35:10Ha, ha!
35:12Ha, ha!
35:14Ha, ha!
35:16Ha, ha!
35:18Ha, ha!
35:20Ha, ha!
35:22Ha, ha!
35:24Ha, ha!
35:26Ha, ha!
35:28Ha, ha!
35:30Ha, ha!
35:32Ha, ha!
35:34Ha, ha!
35:36Ha, ha!
35:38Ha, ha!
35:40Ha, ha!
35:42Ha, ha!
35:44Ha, ha!
35:47Ha, ha!
35:49Ah!
35:59Hmm.
36:00Yeah, it's time somebody start livin' right.
36:03For somebody is starting to look a little worn,
36:06if you know what I mean.
36:14Jeeves!
36:15Good morning, sir.
36:17Where's that dog, Jeeves?
36:19The animal is no longer here, sir.
36:21Lord Pershaw gave him to the porter who sold him.
36:24His lordship took a prejudice against the beast
36:27on account of having been bitten in the calf of the leg, sir.
36:30Excellent. Excellent, Jeeves.
36:32Perhaps I misjudged the little fellow.
36:34Is Lord Pershaw in?
36:36No, sir.
36:37Are you expecting him back for lunch?
36:39No, sir.
36:40Where is he, do you know?
36:42In prison, sir.
36:44In prison?
36:46He assaulted a constable who was attempting to arrest him for disorderly behaviour.
36:50Jeeves, this is frightful!
36:52How could you let him do it?
36:54I rather fancy his bit of time will have run out by then, sir.
36:57Yes, but supposing it hasn't?
36:59In that event, sir, it may be judicious to prevaricate a little.
37:02If I might make the suggestion, sir,
37:04I should inform her ladyship that his lordship has left for a short visit to Boston.
37:08Boston is a very respectable centre, sir.
37:11Jeeves, I think you may have hit it.
37:13With respect, sir, this is perhaps the best thing that could have happened.
37:16I don't see that.
37:17Had this temporary immuration not intervened, sir,
37:19it is highly likely that his lordship would have ended up in a sanatorium
37:22by the time Lady Morven returned.
37:24You're probably right, Jeeves.
37:25The last time I saw him, he only looked a couple of steps away from the Happy Tablet Academy.
37:29Now, Jeeves, I must tell you what happened last night.
37:31Mr Glossop has got himself into a spot of bother with the Stokers.
37:34In love with the daughter, in debt to the dad.
37:36Yes, sir, Mr Glossop was kind enough to put me in the picture when he telephoned earlier.
37:40Did he ask for your advice, Jeeves?
37:42Precisely, sir.
37:43He expressed an eager desire to lay hands upon you, sir.
37:47Did he, by George?
37:48That was the way he expressed himself, sir.
37:50I wouldn't mind laying hands on him, as a matter of fact.
37:52He was the one who didn't turn the blasted alarm off.
37:54He did mention that he would be lunching at Oscars Delmonico
37:57at one o'clock this afternoon, sir.
37:59Perhaps you might find him there.
38:02Hmm.
38:09There you are, you blighter!
38:12Me, a blighter?
38:13You're the blighter!
38:14You didn't get that blasted cheque!
38:16You didn't turn the blasted alarm off!
38:18I did!
38:19It's just that Stoker forgot to turn it on.
38:21So it was off.
38:22So when I turned it off, I turned it on.
38:24What?
38:25No.
38:26I thought Stoker had turned it on, but he hadn't.
38:28He turned it on.
38:29God, you're Stoker!
38:31What am I going to do, Bertie?
38:33If he catches that cheque, I'm...
38:36Bertie?
38:38Hello, Mr. Glossop.
38:40Hello, Pauline.
38:42Mr. Stoker, do sit down.
38:46Would you care for a dry martini before we order lunch?
38:50Mr. Stoker?
38:51I'll have a bourbon and branch water, please.
38:54Waiter, the gentleman would like a...
38:57What's it called?
38:58Oh, yes, a pot of coffee.
39:03Well, Mr. Glossop,
39:04I suppose this lunch is to celebrate our little business deal.
39:08Well, in a sense, yes.
39:11How dare you!
39:13What's the matter, Pauline?
39:19It's all right, Daddy.
39:21Ah.
39:22Yes, I'll start shipping your first six cars in about ten days.
39:28Well, that would be wonderful, but...
39:30Mr. Glossop!
39:32What is it?
39:34Whoa!
39:39Waiter! Waiter!
39:41What the hell is going on here?
39:43And who the blazes is that?
39:48You!
39:49Can't you keep your table in order?
39:51Push off!
39:52Waiter, why do you let these poor folks in here?
39:55Poor?
39:56It's Bertie Wooster.
39:57Well, well, well.
39:59Well, well, well yourself, old fruit.
40:01Glossop!
40:02What was that man doing under our table?
40:05Don't be silly, Daddy. It's Bertie Wooster.
40:07I know perfectly well who it is, Pauline.
40:09I'm not likely to forget your ill-judged engagement to him.
40:13Well, hello, Mr. Stoker.
40:15Here we are again, what?
40:17Just what were you doing under our table?
40:19Well, I was just looking for a spoon.
40:22That is an old chum.
40:24An old chum?
40:26Yes.
40:27Well, let me tell you something, Mr. Glossop.
40:30I do not intend to be in business with anybody
40:33who is an old chum of Mr. Wooster.
40:36That's not fair, Daddy.
40:38It's not Hildebrand's fault that he knows Bertie.
40:40I'm not in the business of being fair, Pauline.
40:42I am in the business of making money
40:45and protecting my family's good name.
40:51He's tearing paper now.
40:53Your check, Mr. Glossop.
40:55And if you came to me on bended knees
40:58and begged me to accept another one,
41:01I would spurn you, you got that?
41:04Spurn you!
41:06Come on.
41:10Well, I got rid of him.
41:14Bye, Bertie.
41:21Well, there you are, old fizzgig.
41:23I've just saved you 10,200 pounds, 14 shillings and fourpence.
41:26I think you can treat me to a bit of lunch.
41:28She's gone, Bertie.
41:29The only woman I've loved.
41:31Yes, but a useful ride, hardly.
41:33I'll never see her again.
41:35The bouillabaisse was rather good here, I've heard.
41:39They don't do any soft-shelled crab, do they?
41:49Tell me, Morton, what measures would you take
41:51here at Blackwell's Island Prison
41:53if one of these desperate creatures tried to escape?
41:55You can't have orders to shoot first
41:57and ask questions later, Lady Albert.
41:59Steady, Poppa.
42:00Come on, you guys.
42:02Pick that up.
42:04Keep moving.
42:07All right, leave him be.
42:11Come on, Blimey, get moving.
42:13Just forget it.
42:16Jeeves?
42:21Jeeves?
42:27Ah, Lady Baldwin.
42:29Well, well, well.
42:31So, you're back.
42:33Yes, I'm back.
42:34Had a pleasant trip?
42:36Oh, extremely, thank you.
42:38I do hope that we'll see each other again.
42:40Yes, we will.
42:42Extremely thank you.
42:44I do hope that Wilmot wasn't in your way, Mr Worcester.
42:47Oh, rather not. No, no, great pals.
42:49No, we hit it off splendidly.
42:51Saw all the sights, you know.
42:53Museum of art in the morning,
42:55and then a spot of lunch at some nice, quiet, vegetarian place,
42:58and then in the afternoon, toddle along to some concert or other,
43:01and then home for an early dinner.
43:03Really?
43:05Yes, and then we normally play dominoes after dinner,
43:08and then early to bed for a refreshing sleep.
43:10We had a great time.
43:12I was only sorry when he went away to Boston.
43:14Oh, Wilmot is in Boston, is he?
43:16Yes, yes, he just hopped one morning and said,
43:18I'm going to Boston,
43:20and then, well, sort of went to Boston.
43:22Extraordinary thing.
43:24Still a very respectable sort of place, Boston.
43:26Not likely to come to any harm in Boston.
43:28It hadn't come, Mr Worcester,
43:30but the fact that when I went to Blackwell's Island Prison
43:33to collect some material for my book,
43:35I saw poor dear Wilmot there,
43:37dressed in a striped suit, walking the exercise yard
43:40with a pack of criminals.
43:42Good Lord, really?
43:44Sir, this is how you've been looking after my poor dear boy, Mr Worcester.
43:48I left him in your charge,
43:50thinking that I could rely on you to shield him from evil.
43:53And you led him astray.
43:55Well, no...
43:57You have deliberately done the...
43:59Mother.
44:01Wilmot.
44:03Good heavens. I've just been to, um...
44:05Uh...
44:07Buffalo. No.
44:09Baltimore.
44:11Hang on. Where have I just been?
44:13Begins with a B, I know.
44:15Prison, sir? That's right.
44:17No!
44:19Perhaps I can explain, Your Ladyship.
44:21You?
44:23When Mr Worcester informed Your Ladyship that his lordship was in Boston,
44:26he was relying on the version I had given him of his lordship's movements.
44:30Mr Worcester was away visiting a friend in the country at the time
44:33and knew nothing of the matter until Your Ladyship explained it to him just now.
44:37What?
44:39As he had grown so attached to his lordship
44:41and taken such pains to look after him,
44:43it might have been hard to persuade Mr Worcester
44:46that your son went to prison voluntarily and from the best motives.
44:49But Your Ladyship, knowing him better, will readily understand.
44:53Wilmot.
44:55You went to prison voluntarily?
44:57Yes. Yes!
44:59His lordship was frequently depressed
45:01at how little he was doing to help collect material for Your Ladyship's book on America.
45:05No, I was! I was!
45:07Yes, I find that very hard to believe.
45:10But surely, Your Ladyship, it is more reasonable to suppose
45:13that a gentleman of Lord Pershaw's character
45:15would go to prison of his own volition.
45:17No, I did. I did.
45:19I went of my own, um, what he said.
45:21Rather than by committing some breach of the law which would necessitate his arrest?
45:25Oh, I didn't. I didn't.
45:27Look, I can prove it.
45:30I've got all the notes I made in prison for the book.
45:32Wilmot, you did all this?
45:34How could I have doubted you?
45:36Look, Mr Worcester, look! Look what he's done!
45:39Mr Worcester, I owe you an apology.
45:42I have done you a great injustice.
45:45I should have had more faith in dear Wilmot's fine and pure spirit.
45:50Absolutely.
45:52Come along, my darling.
45:55Goodbye, Mr Worcester, and thank you.
46:00Thank you.
46:08Jeeves, you are a lifesaver.
46:11Thank you, sir.
46:14You made sure that the stokers met me with company too, didn't you, Jeeves?
46:18It did seem the surest way of securing the return of Mr Glossop's cheque, sir, yes.
46:22Now, Jeeves, that, um, that Al Capone hat of mine...
46:25Yes?
46:27Get rid of it. Burn it or something.
46:30I've already taken the liberty of disposing of it, sir.
46:35Going down.

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