Michael Felger and Jim Murray discuss the DONT's of flying
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00:00People want me to give you something on the airplane etiquette and everything.
00:04So like I, I differentiate, you know, like annoying people on airplanes, the guy that
00:12Mike Holly said to me last night, takes off his shoes or hogs, the armrest or whatever
00:18snores or eats, or I think if you tip your seat back, you're a fricking dick.
00:24Like, I think that sort of makes you kind of a bad dude.
00:27Like it's just a person that puts their seat back, doesn't give a fuck about anything
00:31around them.
00:32They just care about themselves.
00:33Like, but that's not, that's not what I'm here to talk about.
00:37I'm here to talk about the people, the people that delay the plane.
00:43If you delay a plane for your bullshit, whatever it is, you suck.
00:50You suck a hundred times over.
00:53Like it's important.
00:54Time is the most valuable commodity out there.
00:57If you're traveling to see your family, your kids for work, whatever, and now we're sitting
01:03there on the fucking tarmac because you refuse to buckle your seatbelt, or you have to take
01:11out your headset to listen to crew member instructions, or you're being a dick about your bag.
01:16Okay.
01:17Or Odell Beckham won't respond to the stewardess or won't get, I don't even know how, how did
01:22it even start?
01:23Uh, yeah, apparently he got into it with the stewardess because the stewardess or the, the
01:27person working the plane said that he was out of control a little bit, or wasn't responding
01:31to what the flight attendant was asking him to do.
01:33So he was probably like on ambient or something and was afraid of flying and was fucked up.
01:37But what is, what are they asking you to do?
01:39Because if you're fucked up and probably like just put on your seatbelt, no, no, you're
01:43allowed to get on the plane and put on your seatbelt and fall asleep unless you're in an
01:47exit row.
01:47So if he was in an exit row, then they have to come by and say, uh, and give you the
01:53instructions and you have to verbally say, do you understand the instructions?
01:56You say yes.
01:57And then fucking pass out.
02:00If that's all you want to do, you don't have to do anything.
02:02So when he wasn't responding to what they wanted, what did they want?
02:05So it's something like buckle your seatbelt, take out your headphones, uh, listen to crew
02:10member instructions.
02:11If you're in an exit row, I mean, I can't even think you're allowed to go on the plane and fall
02:15asleep if you want.
02:16So it's not just that.
02:18So if you're that person, oh my God.
02:21And back in COVID, if you wouldn't put on a mask, you know what?
02:24I know that's a hot topic and a political thing, but still fuck you.
02:28It's an airplane.
02:29It's not about that.
02:31We're all here.
02:31We all just want to get to where we're going.
02:33So put on the fucking mask for a little bit and let's just get there.
02:36Shall we?
02:37So if you create some sort of stink for any of those personal reasons that causes the
02:44pilot to come out, the guy at the gate to come down, the cops to walk onto a plane,
02:53because what you don't want to listen to the stewardess.
02:58I don't care if the stewardess sucks.
03:00I don't.
03:00Yeah.
03:00They said she was overzealous or he was over.
03:02I don't give a fuck overzealous about what?
03:05Sit down, shut up, take out your headphone, buckle your seatbelt.
03:08What else could it possibly be?
03:10There's not that many instructions and you and the asshole bag people.
03:15It's like, here's an idea.
03:16Don't pack so fucking much.
03:17It's okay.
03:18You don't need three different outfits for one night.
03:21You don't need options.
03:22Rachel, I'm sorry.
03:23Gals, you don't need options.
03:27Well, what my wife's the same.
03:28Well, I need options.
03:29No, you don't like you pack less, but if you do, then check your goddamn bag.
03:34And so we're sitting here waiting for everyone to futz around with their bags.
03:38Sorry.
03:39Like, and if it causes the plane to be delayed and now I can't see my family for an extra
03:45out, whatever it takes because of your stupid bullshit and make no mistake.
03:49It's stupid bullshit.
03:51There's not one thing that you should be delaying the plane for.
03:55And if you have a family emergency or whatever, I'm sorry for you, but you're going to have
03:58to get off the plane and go deal with your family emergency.
04:00Oh my God.
04:02So that's Odell Beckham and anyone like that.
04:04That's my thought on that.
04:05The plane only gets delayed or stopped for two reasons in my mind.
04:09Mechanical because you don't want it to crash, obviously.
04:11And weather.
04:11Period.
04:12End of story.
04:12I couldn't be more with Mike on this.
04:15One of the biggest beliefs I have in life in any way, shape, or form is the greatest
04:18gift you can give to another person is to not inconvenience them, but especially on
04:21the airplanes.
04:22So I said during the 10 question segment, what should happen to Odell Beckham Jr.?
04:27Him.
04:27Anyone.
04:28I don't care who it is.
04:29Male.
04:29Woman.
04:30Child.
04:31Nightsticks in jail.
04:32Jail forever.
04:33I was Bernard on that too.
04:35Don't fuck up the flight plan.
04:37The plane's got to go.
04:38You got to get the hell out of here.
04:40And quick example.
04:41This is how good a person I am.
04:422015.
04:43Last time I was in Las Vegas, I was by myself meeting friends out there for a trip and I
04:48paid for like the more leg room or whatever guy next to me.
04:52He was telling me as we were on the tarmac in Boston, this is going to be his last blowout.
04:56He's got a drug problem.
04:58He's going out there to basically have this last hurrah before he comes back and goes to
05:02rehab.
05:02That's usually when bad things happen, by the way.
05:04Oh, so I see him take something out of his pocket, some kind of pills, crunch on them
05:09and swallow them.
05:11And within 10 minutes of sitting there in the tarmac, he gets like delirious, throws up
05:16into a little, you know, like one of those bags.
05:18The flight attendant knows something's up.
05:20She comes to me, kind of whispers in my ear and says, like, would you like him removed?
05:24But in my head, I said, that's going to fuck up the flight.
05:28So I go, could you just move me?
05:30And that's what she did in mid flight.
05:32She was bullshit and said, you know, we really pretty would have had to have like would have
05:36preferred to have him removed, but you wouldn't need to sign it off and give it the OK.
05:39I'm like, I'm good.
05:40Like, he's now your problem.
05:42We're getting there.
05:43That's what matters.
05:45He's his problem.
05:46Right.
05:47If he wants to fucking not off on a plane, do too many drugs, I'm sorry.
05:52But that delay would have been a delay and the plane would have been fucked up.
05:55And I had somewhere to be.
05:57We all had somewhere to be.
05:58You can't fuck up the flight because of your dumb issues or your panic attack or whatever
06:03the fuck it is.
06:04If you're not comfortable flying, don't fly.
06:06Don't leave.
06:07Don't fuck it up for everyone else.
06:08Your panic attack.
06:10Don't fly.
06:11Right.
06:12Take the train.
06:13Take a bus.
06:14I feel bad for you as a human being.
06:16Like, I personal level.
06:17Fine.
06:18There is no greater crime than taking someone's time.
06:22Taking some, we, it's a finite amount of time.
06:27And that, so like the people who drive too slow or don't go on the red light.
06:32I know these are just seconds we're talking about, but they all add up.
06:35They all add up.
06:37Don't take up someone's time.
06:39Don't be the asshole at the front of the line that when they get to the front of the line,
06:43now talks to the person behind the counter or just takes too much time when people are waiting.
06:48These are the worst kind of people.
06:49You have no recognition of what's behind you and no sort of, no sort of valve in your head
06:55that says, I'm taking this guy's time up and that's kind of rude.
07:00You know, I, it's rude of me to take his time.
07:02And they're just, that's a lot of people.
07:04And when you do it on a plane, it's exacerbated.