The ML Show: What Aren't You Allowed To Do

Transcript

00:00so you're now banned from a household i am i am how did that go down because i've been given

00:05multiple opportunities and i can't do it right yeah me neither what's yours before i tell you

00:12mine mine is taking out the uh the trash that's just because you don't want to do it it's not

00:16that you do it wrong exactly if i do it wrong all of the time at some point dallas would be like

00:21forget it i'll just do it then i only have to like think about it maybe do you at least when

00:27dallas takes the plastic bag out of the house to bring to the garbage outside you at least put the

00:31plastic bag in for him yeah you do yeah i replace it you do yes because i typically need the garbage

00:37can first okay see i'm i'm responsible for taking the garbage out and putting the plastic bag in and

00:43if my wife uh goes to the garbage can and there's not one in there she'll just put the garbage on

00:47the counter and wait for me to throw it in you might want to work on that i think you're doing

00:51too much quite honestly uh i so i have been banned from cooking i cannot follow recipes i've been told

00:58now we use prep services the food prep place yeah and they bring you they give you a card how do you

01:03screw that up i mean they measure everything out for you everything comes pre-measured meaning like

01:09all you have to do is chop it and then put it either in the bowl or in the skillet

01:14why are you yelling at me i have ptsd i'm sorry now i gotta relive sunday your wife your wife and

01:21your real wife yeah like you know what i just did i zoned out like i did on sunday when she was saying

01:25the same exact thing as you i was just like why are you yelling at me sorry so then i was so uh i have

01:31a problem following along with the cards uh because there's a lot of information that comes out at once

01:36on the cards like step one cut tomatoes and then it's like five other things uh while you're cutting

01:43the tomatoes also uh get in a small bowl uh half a cup of milk and then put all the contents of the

01:50hot sauce into them i mean it's just one thing after another and then it's like step two and i'm

01:54like so what do you do one is 25 things what do i do i sweat i take my shirt off no you use that thing

02:01as a mere suggestion and if i know you you just start concocting your own recipe from it right that's

02:08probably more likely i go you don't need three quarters cup that's way too much yeah i'll just

02:13do a half or you know a quarter and then amanda's like are you following the instructions and i'm like

02:18yeah i am and she goes back and looks she's like no you're not meanwhile you have like four things

02:23left over that was supposed to be in the recipe and i'm not kidding you like the meal prep services

02:27measure it out for you like if you need vinegar they send you like a teeny tiny little bottle of it and

02:33you're just supposed to dump it in you probably leave that out totally it's like it's like when

02:39you put together an ikea uh furniture and then you have like 17 screws left afterwards and you're like

02:44they sent me extra it's standing and they sent us extra it was perfect so then the other night i went

02:51to make tacos and i didn't put enough seasoning in i used a half a packet of seasoning because i picture

02:56the kids at some point telling amanda that they don't like the seasoned meat but that i guess that

03:01wasn't true so i got the you put the whole thing of seasoning in it i go okay she's like well i'm not

03:07eating it you know it just doesn't taste good i go well put the seasoning in now yeah yeah essentially

03:12you could throw it back of course you could she's like no under protest i'll just eat cereal

03:18that in the middle of a meal amanda got a bowl of cereal and then guess what guess what the kids

03:35wanted count chocula too the only one that was eating the meat was me and the damn dog

03:41you