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Watch All Good Morning Pakistan Shows Hereš https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLb2aaNHUy_gH3QcxA-79S5m-OPuw6lVzR
Host: Nida Yasir
Guest: Uroosa Siddiqui, Ghazal Siddique,
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00:02:15As-Salaam-Alaikum
00:02:17Good Morning
00:02:18Good Morning Mekhe Walon
00:02:19How are you?
00:02:20Why did I call you Mekhe Walon?
00:02:22The reason for that is
00:02:23that today I will show you
00:02:24as a proper Mekhe Wali
00:02:26Many times it happens that
00:02:28you have a lot of things in your heart
00:02:30and you
00:02:31don't share them with anyone
00:02:33and there are reasons for not sharing them
00:02:36One is that you think
00:02:38that I will be judged
00:02:40or this is not the right time
00:02:42to share my thoughts with anyone
00:02:44There is a shame
00:02:46Obviously, your friends
00:02:48your close people
00:02:49you can't be raw in front of them
00:02:53You have to put filters in your life
00:02:57Although, what you think
00:02:59what is in your heart
00:03:02Sometimes, your heart wants to
00:03:04take it out
00:03:06because a lot of people
00:03:08have been seen
00:03:09who don't take things out of their heart
00:03:11They fall sick
00:03:13get stressed
00:03:14get depressed
00:03:16and they develop
00:03:18some compulsive habits
00:03:20eat more
00:03:22or eat less
00:03:25get insomnia
00:03:27can't sleep
00:03:29Insomnia
00:03:31health is falling
00:03:33weight is falling
00:03:34or weight is increasing
00:03:35There are a lot of things
00:03:37Everything has to do with the heart
00:03:39If your heart is sad
00:03:41about something
00:03:43and if you
00:03:45take those things out
00:03:47if you get exhaust
00:03:49then a lot of things
00:03:51your problems
00:03:53can save your life
00:03:55because when you share things with people
00:03:57and they are right people
00:03:59they give you the right advice
00:04:01When you share things with people
00:04:03it doesn't stay in your heart
00:04:05and because of your mood swings
00:04:07you feel bad at that time
00:04:09but when you take it out
00:04:11and you do it relaxedly
00:04:13then you think
00:04:15it wasn't that bad
00:04:17my heart shouldn't have been so sad
00:04:19So, it is very important
00:04:21In our culture
00:04:23usually
00:04:25the girl
00:04:27shares her feelings with her mother
00:04:29the boy
00:04:31shares his feelings with his friends
00:04:33and sometimes with his wife
00:04:35if he feels that he has a partner
00:04:37and basically
00:04:39in an ideal life
00:04:41husband and wife
00:04:43share their feelings
00:04:45and don't judge each other
00:04:47your sister
00:04:49siblings
00:04:51there is an exhaust in our culture
00:04:53with which you can
00:04:55talk about your heart
00:04:57that's why I am telling you
00:04:59because you
00:05:01without showing your face
00:05:03if you want an exhaust
00:05:05if you want someone to listen to you
00:05:07and that thing
00:05:09which is in your heart
00:05:11and give you advice
00:05:13or just listen to you
00:05:15then I am here for you
00:05:17every hour I am giving you
00:05:19your heart's words
00:05:21as an exhaust
00:05:23your heart's grudges as an exhaust
00:05:25your heart's story
00:05:27and depression
00:05:29stress
00:05:31to listen to all that
00:05:33so today more than speaking
00:05:35I will listen to you
00:05:37maybe
00:05:39someone else's problems are the same as yours
00:05:41so do watch today's show
00:05:43Good Morning Pakistan
00:05:47Good Morning Pakistan
00:05:55Welcome
00:05:57Welcome back Good Morning Pakistan
00:05:59as I told you today you can talk about your heart
00:06:01and to talk about your heart
00:06:03you need a good listener
00:06:05with that
00:06:07a listener
00:06:09who is harmless
00:06:11means
00:06:13what you have said from your heart
00:06:15keep it in your heart
00:06:17along with that
00:06:19give a useful advice
00:06:21they say no matter how many friends you have
00:06:23but don't be a naive friend
00:06:25because because of your naivety
00:06:27it can ruin your life
00:06:29so today
00:06:31I wanted to invite
00:06:33secure people on my show
00:06:35who are sensible
00:06:37who are living their life sensibly
00:06:39and
00:06:41we also need some advice from them
00:06:43we get such advice
00:06:45which are useful
00:06:47I have guessed this much
00:06:49so let's welcome Ghazal Siddiq
00:06:51Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:06:53Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:06:55I get a positive energy
00:06:57in the morning
00:06:59so I thought today
00:07:01let's have a meeting of positive people
00:07:03and thank you very much
00:07:05for including me among those people
00:07:07who think positive
00:07:09and can give better advice
00:07:11so I thought
00:07:13let's take advantage of them
00:07:15and you said such a good thing
00:07:17that
00:07:19a naive friend
00:07:21is better than a naive enemy
00:07:23exactly
00:07:25so you just
00:07:27have to open your heart
00:07:29and give a positive advice
00:07:31some people
00:07:33give a good advice
00:07:35but those people
00:07:37themselves don't know
00:07:39if you talk about your husband
00:07:41or Yasir
00:07:43then I will say
00:07:45I treat my husband like this
00:07:47and you do the same
00:07:49I am in good faith
00:07:51you are in my love
00:07:53which your siblings and mothers do
00:07:55if you tell them something
00:07:57they will be on your side
00:07:59instead of thinking
00:08:01what is the situation
00:08:03they give you advice
00:08:05and in that advice
00:08:07they ruin their home
00:08:09and you should never give emotional advice
00:08:11you should listen to them
00:08:13and first
00:08:15put yourself in that shoes
00:08:17first
00:08:19think about
00:08:21how you would have reacted
00:08:23and sometimes
00:08:25those good people
00:08:27who listen to you
00:08:29if you are in pain
00:08:31then you need an exhaust
00:08:33you don't need advice
00:08:35you don't need to say
00:08:37it's your fault
00:08:39many of your friends
00:08:41are opposite
00:08:43it's your fault
00:08:45you feel bad
00:08:47you need to be a psychiatrist
00:08:49and listen to them
00:08:51so that they vent out
00:08:53so that they vent out
00:08:55sometimes you need to
00:08:57put an exhaust
00:08:59husband and wife
00:09:01fight
00:09:03listen to them
00:09:05it happens to me
00:09:07I tell my husband
00:09:09to listen to me
00:09:11and then I get angry
00:09:13yes, it's very important
00:09:15so let's complete this team
00:09:17with us
00:09:19our expert
00:09:21we have also gone through
00:09:23all those things
00:09:25but she has studied
00:09:27and solves other's problems
00:09:29with us today is Dr. Rabia Farooqui
00:09:31clinical psychologist
00:09:33and Urusa Siddiqui
00:09:35who is a mix of
00:09:37sensible and fun
00:09:39Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:09:41Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:09:43where will we sit?
00:09:45how are you?
00:09:47Urusa has started wearing a belt
00:09:49it was loose
00:09:51so I kept it open
00:09:53for bad times
00:09:55how are you?
00:09:57Urusa your hair and makeup
00:09:59when you reach late
00:10:01I don't know how
00:10:03magic happens
00:10:05no, Shaheen bhaji is so good
00:10:07whenever I come
00:10:09I just sit with my face
00:10:11today Urusa is looking like an actress
00:10:13glamorous
00:10:15Mashallah
00:10:17today's topic
00:10:19sometimes you
00:10:21need to vent out
00:10:23so instead of others
00:10:25let's start with ourselves
00:10:27Ghazal and Urusa
00:10:29I have a question
00:10:31do you need a listener
00:10:33where you can vent out
00:10:35or do you count among those
00:10:37who keep things in their heart
00:10:39everyone needs a listener
00:10:41yes
00:10:43and after that
00:10:45they empathize with you
00:10:47they reach your place
00:10:49first they say yes
00:10:51and never start
00:10:53with negative
00:10:55when I taught in school
00:10:57I realized
00:10:59when kids
00:11:01open up
00:11:03they have a lot of problems
00:11:05when they tell their mom
00:11:07what happened today
00:11:09if you tell them
00:11:11no, you said this
00:11:13you don't have to start
00:11:15with negative
00:11:17I am asking you
00:11:19what kind of listener
00:11:21do you need?
00:11:23my son
00:11:25I have only 2 listeners
00:11:27my mom
00:11:29she passed away
00:11:31you don't open up with everyone
00:11:33my son and my husband
00:11:35are very good friends
00:11:37but my husband is a good teacher
00:11:39he becomes a teacher
00:11:41if you tell them
00:11:43something
00:11:45they get inspired
00:11:47they expect me
00:11:49to be very smart
00:11:51sometimes
00:11:53they say
00:11:55I didn't expect this from you
00:11:57you get emotional
00:11:59on a small thing
00:12:01sometimes
00:12:03your husband is more mature
00:12:05than you
00:12:07they expect
00:12:09why are you
00:12:11wasting your time
00:12:13listen to me
00:12:15sometimes
00:12:17who is your best listener?
00:12:19the one you wore this crown
00:12:21I think
00:12:23my son
00:12:25my son
00:12:27he
00:12:29handles me better
00:12:31sometimes
00:12:33between me and my husband
00:12:35my son
00:12:37solves it easily
00:12:39he is a third person
00:12:41sometimes you think I am right
00:12:43sometimes he thinks he is right
00:12:45we trust him
00:12:47he hits me
00:12:49you gave your son
00:12:51the award of best listener
00:12:53who is your best listener?
00:12:55in my life
00:12:57now science has
00:12:59proven that women
00:13:01connect emotionally
00:13:03and think differently
00:13:05men think differently
00:13:07but
00:13:09I know many things
00:13:11I don't understand
00:13:13but my mom
00:13:15before marriage
00:13:17there were no discussions
00:13:19but after marriage
00:13:21mother and daughter
00:13:23become friends
00:13:25and you can share whatever you want
00:13:27so
00:13:29my therapy
00:13:31session
00:13:33or anything
00:13:35life related questions
00:13:37just a phone call
00:13:39why in life
00:13:41it's not necessary
00:13:43even with Saqib
00:13:45when you get a chance
00:13:47our life is so
00:13:49crazy
00:13:51he has his own stress
00:13:53I have my own stress
00:13:55you think it's not important
00:13:57but if you get a chance
00:13:59and I freak out
00:14:01and I share something with Saqib
00:14:03sometimes
00:14:05practically
00:14:07what I made in my mind
00:14:09they make it so simple
00:14:11and sometimes opposite
00:14:13happens
00:14:15who will you give your award to?
00:14:17mine would go with mom
00:14:19and after that
00:14:21runner up
00:14:23my
00:14:25best listeners are my sisters
00:14:27you are blessed to have
00:14:29sisters in you
00:14:31I won't call my mom a good listener
00:14:33because
00:14:35if I tell my mom
00:14:37to leave her husband
00:14:39she would say
00:14:41mom, you are a soldier
00:14:43R or Par
00:14:45nothing in between
00:14:47so?
00:14:49so my sisters
00:14:51I will give them an award
00:14:53that they are my best listeners
00:14:55and when you work
00:14:57as a working lady
00:14:59there is someone in your workplace
00:15:01who is your best listener
00:15:03so
00:15:05when I didn't work
00:15:07when I was with my sisters
00:15:09I got an award
00:15:11and now my colleagues
00:15:13who are around me
00:15:15makeup artists
00:15:17I think
00:15:19I have been blessed
00:15:21with all kinds of
00:15:23makeup artists
00:15:25but I think
00:15:27I have a couple of people
00:15:29who have been very nice
00:15:31and very kind
00:15:33I try to exhaust
00:15:35educated people
00:15:37because of whom I get good advice
00:15:39and I think
00:15:41slowly you will judge
00:15:43I think your sisters are your best listeners
00:15:45you know that
00:15:47this will not go anywhere
00:15:49you can't talk to them
00:15:51they won't judge you
00:15:53when I was a late age
00:15:55I used to avoid
00:15:57if there was a problem
00:15:59in the workplace or at home
00:16:01I didn't bother my mom
00:16:03because of this
00:16:05in the last few years
00:16:07I didn't share a lot of
00:16:09intense things with her
00:16:11but you are right
00:16:13I am blessed with 6 sisters
00:16:15one of them is in Australia
00:16:17whose name is Apija
00:16:19God has given her
00:16:21an amazing ability
00:16:23that she only listens
00:16:25and in the end
00:16:27she doesn't give you
00:16:29advice
00:16:31she says you are right
00:16:33God will do better
00:16:35she knows that
00:16:37if I give her an advice
00:16:39she will only listen
00:16:41she has very good stories
00:16:43I will ask you
00:16:45what does your studies
00:16:47say?
00:16:49who should you make a good listener?
00:16:51blood relation
00:16:53or your friends
00:16:55if I keep a choice in front of you
00:16:57is there any formula
00:16:59that your colleagues
00:17:01your family
00:17:03your spouse
00:17:05who should you make a good listener?
00:17:07unfortunately
00:17:09we can't choose
00:17:11who to make a good listener
00:17:13it depends on the listener
00:17:15who will be a good listener for you
00:17:17some people are lucky
00:17:19like you
00:17:21you have good listeners in your family
00:17:23you have sisters
00:17:25but not everyone
00:17:27some families are dysfunctional
00:17:29they don't have good relations
00:17:31or parents
00:17:33even after doing everything
00:17:35they don't have emotional capacity
00:17:37to listen
00:17:39brothers and sisters
00:17:41don't have bonding
00:17:43so their friends can be good listeners
00:17:45colleagues can be good listeners
00:17:47it varies person to person
00:17:49it really depends on the listener
00:17:51it depends on the quality
00:17:53you connect with
00:17:55so that you feel
00:17:57this person doesn't judge me
00:17:59secondly
00:18:01he understands your feelings
00:18:03he understands what you want to say
00:18:05and he also understands
00:18:07that at this time
00:18:09you need to listen
00:18:11or you need advice
00:18:13because people who give advice
00:18:15people get cut off
00:18:17that he is not a good listener
00:18:19good listeners are those
00:18:21who understand the need of the listener
00:18:23I would like to ask you
00:18:25one point
00:18:27sometimes we don't know
00:18:29who is sincere
00:18:31or gossip
00:18:33that's why
00:18:35Ghazal
00:18:37we take support of our family
00:18:39we think my mother
00:18:41or my brothers
00:18:43they are sincere
00:18:45but not in every household
00:18:47you are right
00:18:49some sisters
00:18:51I don't have a sister
00:18:53but I know a couple of friends
00:18:55of mine
00:18:57they don't trust each other
00:18:59they are more inclined towards friends
00:19:01so again
00:19:03it depends on the listener
00:19:05and secondly
00:19:07if you share
00:19:09with someone at home
00:19:11suppose my sister-in-law is very nice
00:19:13or sister
00:19:15she will share her problems
00:19:17with her sister-in-law
00:19:19you don't tell anyone
00:19:21whatever you want to spread
00:19:23it will spread
00:19:25someone gave me a very good advice
00:19:27but I got it late
00:19:29someone gave me an advice
00:19:31for example
00:19:33if there is a problem between the spouse
00:19:35and often the daughters
00:19:37talk to their mother or sisters
00:19:39so what happens
00:19:41the mother and sisters get upset
00:19:43and of course
00:19:45the relationship of the son-in-law and sister
00:19:47the husband and wife
00:19:49will fight and get together
00:19:51but the respect
00:19:53your husband should get
00:19:55in your family
00:19:57he is not able to give
00:19:59the sincerity and love
00:20:01which is raw
00:20:03when you praise your spouse
00:20:05the respect he is giving
00:20:07he is not able to give
00:20:09because he feels bad
00:20:11that he is not keeping my daughter
00:20:13or my sister happy
00:20:15someone gave me an advice
00:20:17that whenever this happens
00:20:19the vent you want to exhaust
00:20:21do it with your friends
00:20:23because those friends will be harmless
00:20:25they will listen to you
00:20:27and you will be fine
00:20:29and they will not meet your husband
00:20:31but your family
00:20:33they will meet you
00:20:35this is very important
00:20:37so this
00:20:39I understood after my age
00:20:41I didn't understand in the beginning
00:20:43because in between
00:20:45husband and wife fight
00:20:47so I used to tell my mother and sister
00:20:49so my mother used to get angry
00:20:51in the sense that
00:20:53she was not able to hide things
00:20:55so many times
00:20:57I had to make friends
00:20:59so this
00:21:01when someone told me
00:21:03I used to tell my daughter
00:21:05and other girls
00:21:07that you have to take care of these things
00:21:09if you want to talk to someone
00:21:11so think about
00:21:13what are the after effects
00:21:15I will add one thing
00:21:17we will come back after a short break
00:21:19then we will listen to you
00:21:31welcome back to Good Morning Pakistan
00:21:33we told you our segment
00:21:35now we will listen to you
00:21:37but before that
00:21:39I wanted to complete
00:21:41I wanted to say
00:21:43you said a very good thing
00:21:45that you should not tell
00:21:47such things to your family
00:21:49but to those people
00:21:51who don't have such sincere friends
00:21:53because not everyone has
00:21:55and before sharing such things
00:21:57you should see
00:21:59that you have a very sincere friend
00:22:01you should share such personal things with him
00:22:03there are many friends
00:22:05with whom you are going out
00:22:07but it is not necessary that they are so deep
00:22:09so what should you do in this situation
00:22:11first of all
00:22:13you should think
00:22:15that I am feeling very bad in this moment
00:22:17it is affecting me a lot
00:22:19will I feel so bad after 4 days
00:22:21will I feel so bad after 5 days
00:22:23if not
00:22:25then it means
00:22:27I need to go out
00:22:29but I should not do any long term damage
00:22:31practice
00:22:33if you start doing
00:22:35then you will be able to practice
00:22:37there is a small technique
00:22:39that you have to tell
00:22:41record a voice message
00:22:43send it on your number
00:22:45I do this
00:22:47type it
00:22:49send it on your number
00:22:51when you will listen to it
00:22:53you will feel
00:22:55that I have exaggerated the situation
00:22:57you will be able to vent
00:22:59and you will be able to control the damage
00:23:01but of course
00:23:03if you practice
00:23:05you will be able to control
00:23:07like in old times
00:23:09writing a diary
00:23:11this is a new technique
00:23:13many people
00:23:15used to have
00:23:17exhaust diary
00:23:19in old times
00:23:21when I was in college
00:23:23or university
00:23:25I used to write a diary
00:23:27if I had a problem with my parents
00:23:29I used to write a diary
00:23:31and sometimes I used to write a letter to my father
00:23:33if I could not speak
00:23:35I used to write a letter
00:23:37he used to write a letter
00:23:39I want you to be successful in life
00:23:41I used to write
00:23:43why are these things so fun
00:23:45you said
00:23:47if you talk about your husband
00:23:49to your mother
00:23:51to your sisters
00:23:53we will be fine
00:23:55but in their heart
00:23:57the same mistake
00:23:59they are very sad
00:24:01they do not get a sincere person
00:24:03they do this to their children
00:24:05that your father did this
00:24:07and your grandmother did this
00:24:09or your aunt does this
00:24:11after that
00:24:13they will always have that thing in their heart
00:24:15and they will never be able
00:24:17to love their grandmother
00:24:19or their aunt
00:24:21so you have to be careful
00:24:23with these things
00:24:25and control
00:24:27I have seen that kids
00:24:29are scared of their grandmothers
00:24:31but they are scared of their aunts
00:24:33they should be as close to their aunts
00:24:35as possible
00:24:37but they are not able to be
00:24:39that close to their aunts
00:24:41the main reason for this is
00:24:43their in-laws
00:24:45and what happens in that
00:24:47they feel that the kid is
00:24:49distant from them
00:24:51so this way the relationship gets bad
00:24:53and there is a deadlock
00:24:55let's listen to her
00:24:57Shahista will talk to us
00:24:59about her heart
00:25:01Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:25:03I have been married for 10 years
00:25:05and I have two daughters
00:25:07Shahista please speak a little louder
00:25:09we belong to a middle class family
00:25:11my father had a normal job
00:25:13I have seen my mother
00:25:15since childhood
00:25:17she used to work very hard
00:25:19she used to save her salary
00:25:21and spend the whole month
00:25:23for her studies
00:25:25since childhood
00:25:27I always wanted my husband
00:25:29to be ambitious
00:25:33but when I got married
00:25:35I noticed the same thing
00:25:37in my husband
00:25:39that he used to come to
00:25:41his friends
00:25:43and eat and sleep
00:25:45so in the beginning
00:25:47I used to make him understand
00:25:49but my point of view
00:25:51is that I am not greedy
00:25:53but you should do something
00:25:55to move forward
00:25:57I have two daughters
00:25:59and I want them to do a part-time job
00:26:01one time they lost their job
00:26:03so they were not making any effort
00:26:05but the second salary was
00:26:07less than the first
00:26:09so I used to suggest them
00:26:11to ride a bike or do a part-time job
00:26:13so that they don't have to leave
00:26:15their safe zone
00:26:17they are in the same salary
00:26:19I am trying to make them understand
00:26:21that I am making them understand
00:26:23that we are making them understand
00:26:25but the future will be different
00:26:27but they don't understand
00:26:29this is what I wanted to tell them
00:26:31I have seen my mother
00:26:33making a living
00:26:35and we used to make our wishes
00:26:37I don't want my daughters
00:26:39to make their wishes
00:26:41I am trying to make them understand
00:26:43but they don't understand
00:26:45this is what I want to tell them
00:26:47I don't want my daughters
00:26:49to live in the same salary
00:26:51I am qualified
00:26:53I take tuitions
00:26:55but I want them to be ambitious
00:26:57I don't want them to be greedy
00:26:59to do a part-time job
00:27:01this is what I want
00:27:05your spouse
00:27:07has different qualities
00:27:09and different weaknesses
00:27:13when a man is over ambitious
00:27:15when he is greedy
00:27:19when he is under ambitious
00:27:23we rely on the man
00:27:25to run the house
00:27:27now you have him
00:27:29either you win the lottery
00:27:31or you don't
00:27:33now you have to live with him
00:27:35with all his good and bad
00:27:37what should a woman do?
00:27:39this is a tricky situation
00:27:41it is hurtful for them
00:27:43the fear they had
00:27:45from their childhood
00:27:47has turned into reality
00:27:49now you are right
00:27:51you have to live with him
00:27:53for your satisfaction
00:27:55you can do one thing
00:27:57look at your husband's negative qualities
00:27:59to balance it
00:28:01think about his positive qualities
00:28:03what is good about him
00:28:05what is good
00:28:07tell yourself
00:28:09their next fear is
00:28:11that their daughters
00:28:13should not live like this
00:28:15so a woman can
00:28:17bring up her daughters
00:28:19so that they are not so dependent
00:28:21that they think
00:28:23only their husband will provide
00:28:25women who are ambitious
00:28:27and achieve their goals
00:28:29their energy
00:28:31attracts such people
00:28:35you mean
00:28:37bring up your daughters
00:28:39yes
00:28:41instead of
00:28:43telling them to get married
00:28:45develop their skills
00:28:47teach them
00:28:49it is not necessary
00:28:51that you have to pay
00:28:53a lot of money to teach them
00:28:55develop their mindset
00:28:57so that
00:28:59whatever you want
00:29:01to achieve
00:29:03it is your responsibility
00:29:05you will choose your spouse
00:29:07we will see
00:29:09it depends on your luck
00:29:11so don't think
00:29:13that my husband should
00:29:15give me such a life
00:29:17and then you
00:29:19don't develop yourself
00:29:21make yourself
00:29:23capable of achieving
00:29:25your life
00:29:27leave it to your luck
00:29:29develop your judgment
00:29:31bring up your daughters
00:29:33so that they can
00:29:35be ambitious
00:29:37sometimes it is a woman
00:29:39sometimes it is a man
00:29:41there are 2-3 points
00:29:43in fear
00:29:45there is a law of attraction
00:29:47if you
00:29:49think from childhood
00:29:51all your energy
00:29:53will take you there
00:29:55it is about manifesting
00:29:57whatever you manifest
00:29:59it will come in front of you
00:30:01she was with her
00:30:03but now she is
00:30:05not afraid of her daughters
00:30:07she is afraid
00:30:09that her daughters
00:30:11are not able to fulfill her wishes
00:30:13she has to think
00:30:15how lucky she is
00:30:17that her husband is not
00:30:19stopping her from working
00:30:21there are many families
00:30:23who don't let their wives
00:30:25do anything
00:30:27the third thing
00:30:29I felt
00:30:31women think
00:30:33only men
00:30:35have to do everything
00:30:37he has to fulfill
00:30:39all my wishes
00:30:41we have to get out of this thought
00:30:43those who are
00:30:45allowed to work
00:30:47they are lucky
00:30:49the world is open
00:30:51they can take online tuitions
00:30:53they don't have to physically go
00:30:55they can do a lot
00:30:57one thing is done
00:30:59you have to think
00:31:01what are the qualities
00:31:03why couples are made
00:31:05if one tyre is weak
00:31:07the other tyre pulls the car
00:31:09wherever you see
00:31:11husbands don't leave
00:31:13their comfort zone
00:31:15if they have 9 to 5 job
00:31:17they are not getting salary
00:31:19they are not doing courses
00:31:21they are not learning skills
00:31:23ambitious people
00:31:25they don't do 9 to 5 job
00:31:27they develop skills
00:31:29I have to move forward
00:31:31I don't have growth in this job
00:31:33they are on back seat
00:31:35if wife is ambitious
00:31:37she says I will do
00:31:39if man is not there
00:31:41he doesn't have the nature
00:31:43to find ways
00:31:45we have choice
00:31:47we can cry all our life
00:31:49or we can do something
00:31:51first thing is
00:31:53don't put fear in their heart
00:31:55there are a lot of couples
00:31:57if you see in old times
00:31:59if your grandmother is grandfather
00:32:01or your grandfather
00:32:03or your elders
00:32:05they do normal 9 to 5 job
00:32:07grandmother is putting committees
00:32:09she is saving money
00:32:11she is a house wife
00:32:13but how she has to save
00:32:15she has saved
00:32:17grandfather's comfort zone money
00:32:19how she has saved
00:32:21how much she has to give
00:32:23how she has saved
00:32:25some people are like this
00:32:27my parents are like this
00:32:29my father was in East Pakistan
00:32:31he was in Red Camp
00:32:33he was there
00:32:35he moved to Karachi
00:32:37my mother came in boat
00:32:39after that a new life
00:32:41they got married
00:32:43my father couldn't study much
00:32:45he had a normal job
00:32:47but my mother was very
00:32:49saving money
00:32:51multitasking
00:32:53she was at home
00:32:55as a house wife
00:32:57my father used to say
00:32:59she is your mother
00:33:01who can make this house
00:33:03my mother made a house
00:33:05with that salary
00:33:07whatever she could do
00:33:09her priority was
00:33:11to study well
00:33:13to eat less
00:33:15to do less
00:33:17whether we were in Sagara
00:33:19when my father had a heart attack
00:33:21my mother was very
00:33:23smart
00:33:25we were all students at that time
00:33:27my mother said
00:33:29you guys need to understand
00:33:31you don't know much
00:33:33just do this and that
00:33:35learn this and that
00:33:37learn computer courses
00:33:39do this and that
00:33:41small things
00:33:43that she did
00:33:45her children got better
00:33:47my father was
00:33:49doing part time
00:33:51but there is a limit
00:33:53how far he can go
00:33:55this is the house
00:33:57I don't have that much
00:33:59note this point
00:34:01everyone has a limit
00:34:03her husband
00:34:05he has a limit
00:34:07everyone has a limit
00:34:09he can't increase
00:34:11if you think you are ambitious
00:34:13and that thing triggers you
00:34:15there is heaven for you
00:34:17and you have permission
00:34:19if you are ambitious
00:34:21you can do a lot of things
00:34:23and skills
00:34:25my parents were both ambitious
00:34:27and we have seen them
00:34:29working hard
00:34:31all their life
00:34:33so they are in our group
00:34:35and the second thing is
00:34:37that my daughters
00:34:39won't be able to fulfill their wishes
00:34:41that is very sad
00:34:43you don't have to keep them in this complex
00:34:45you have to develop their personality
00:34:47you don't need
00:34:49branded things
00:34:51you have to move ahead
00:34:53and have a long term thinking
00:34:55and every person is different
00:34:57who wants this life
00:34:59maybe their daughters don't want
00:35:01who wants
00:35:03they are ambitious
00:35:05to give everything to their children
00:35:07maybe their children don't want
00:35:09maybe their children want something else
00:35:11my son is wearing torn shoes
00:35:13change your shoes
00:35:15I don't have time
00:35:17because his priority is different
00:35:19he is wearing torn shoes
00:35:21his clothes are old
00:35:23he didn't buy new clothes
00:35:25children don't care
00:35:27but when girls want to get married
00:35:29they should know
00:35:31what kind of partner they want
00:35:33think before getting married
00:35:35don't get carried away by love
00:35:37if they are ambitious
00:35:39if they are looking for a partner
00:35:41they should analyze
00:35:43girls get married at a young age
00:35:45they can't analyze
00:35:47if the other person is the one
00:35:49they want or not
00:35:51in arranged marriages
00:35:53we neglect
00:35:55what kind of partner
00:35:57the girl wants
00:35:59we want a boy from a good family
00:36:01educated, good salary
00:36:03we don't look at the personality
00:36:05we don't look at the character
00:36:07we don't look at the direction
00:36:09when it is the most important
00:36:11it is your test
00:36:13you will get to know
00:36:15you will get to know
00:36:17if you are aware
00:36:19we are not aware
00:36:21we get married
00:36:23we will get aware
00:36:25our life is limited
00:36:27we want a prince
00:36:29on a horse
00:36:31or a daughter-in-law
00:36:33like insta
00:36:35Gen Z's are very smart
00:36:37we are not that smart
00:36:39but Gen Z's are very smart
00:36:41very smart
00:36:43they should fulfill their goals
00:36:45and then get married
00:36:47trust them
00:36:49let them think
00:36:51don't push them
00:36:53let's move to the next topic
00:36:55Maryam
00:36:57don't think that we are talking a lot
00:36:59because you are behind the box
00:37:01and we don't know you
00:37:03we are not judging you
00:37:05but what you are saying
00:37:07can help a lot of women
00:37:09and men
00:37:11viewers
00:37:13Maryam
00:37:15Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:37:17today I want to share
00:37:19what is in my heart
00:37:21but this trauma is too much
00:37:23for me
00:37:25since childhood
00:37:27compared to my siblings
00:37:29compared to my brother
00:37:31I had a dark complexion
00:37:33and my features were dark
00:37:35because of which
00:37:37I used to be taunted
00:37:39at home
00:37:41my parents used to tell me
00:37:43if I like a light colour
00:37:45of a dress
00:37:47they used to tell me not to wear it
00:37:49or give it to my sister-in-law
00:37:51or it won't look good on me
00:37:53like peach lipsticks
00:37:55or very light pink
00:37:57I was not allowed to wear that
00:37:59because I thought
00:38:01it will look cheap on me
00:38:03but my siblings used to wear it
00:38:05once
00:38:07it was my brother's wedding
00:38:09and everyone decided
00:38:11to get ready from the salon
00:38:13when I expressed my wish
00:38:15that I also want to get ready
00:38:17then everyone started laughing
00:38:19then somehow I convinced
00:38:21that I will also get ready
00:38:23but when we went to the salon
00:38:25my sister and my mother
00:38:27told me to make it fair
00:38:29or change the colour
00:38:31so that it won't look good on me
00:38:33and that's how
00:38:35other make-up artists started laughing at me
00:38:37I used to feel so bad
00:38:39that I couldn't even tell anyone
00:38:41even if I used to tell my mother
00:38:43she used to give me suggestions
00:38:45to apply some formula cream
00:38:47or this or that
00:38:49but she didn't understand
00:38:51what I was trying to say
00:38:53and what I was feeling
00:38:55I used to feel so bad
00:38:57that I didn't want
00:38:59to come in front of my family
00:39:01so that they don't think
00:39:03that there are people
00:39:05with dark complexion
00:39:07so they can also have a problem
00:39:09so these things
00:39:11have been going on with me
00:39:13since my childhood
00:39:15and no one is listening to me
00:39:17and now even people from outside
00:39:19have started hitting me
00:39:21because when they see
00:39:23their eyes open
00:39:25the slavery of British people
00:39:27is still not over
00:39:29they have left
00:39:31but they have left this complex
00:39:33because in the west
00:39:35they are getting tanned
00:39:37by applying tanning cream
00:39:39and they are being attracted
00:39:41by people with dark complexion
00:39:43and our complexion has also
00:39:45not left them alone
00:39:47so this thing
00:39:49has been transferred
00:39:51in South Asia
00:39:53this complex
00:39:55we will discuss about it
00:39:57after a short break
00:39:59good morning
00:40:11welcome
00:40:13welcome back
00:40:15good morning Pakistan
00:40:17we will listen to you
00:40:19many people
00:40:21have similar feelings
00:40:23maybe after listening to someone
00:40:25you feel
00:40:27that you are blessed
00:40:29you always feel
00:40:31that you always
00:40:33look at the people above you
00:40:35and you are the victim of complex
00:40:37sometimes when you listen
00:40:39to people who are more sad than you
00:40:41you feel thankful
00:40:43that you are not as sad as the other
00:40:45so let's go
00:40:47sorry
00:40:49our last discussion
00:40:51was about complexion
00:40:53so we will discuss about that
00:40:55Nida if we
00:40:57go into family trauma
00:40:59it will be a long discussion
00:41:01I would like to say two things
00:41:03first
00:41:05everything is not in our control
00:41:07in our hands
00:41:09complexion, height are factors
00:41:11that we cannot control
00:41:13but there are many things
00:41:15grooming is in our hands
00:41:17how to do dressing
00:41:19how to get hair cut
00:41:21what color make up to use
00:41:23what kind of dresses to wear
00:41:25with which you can
00:41:27remove what you already have
00:41:29and it is totally in your hands
00:41:31so don't focus on things
00:41:33that are not in your hands
00:41:35focus on things that you can control
00:41:37to make yourself better
00:41:39second thing is
00:41:41how family treats them
00:41:43we don't think
00:41:45that other people
00:41:47treat us the same
00:41:49as we present ourselves
00:41:51if they are asked
00:41:53they don't answer
00:41:55they don't express
00:41:57they don't say
00:41:59that I am hurt
00:42:01or I am not responsible for this color
00:42:03or sometimes
00:42:05parents have to say
00:42:07it was your genes
00:42:09I didn't make it
00:42:11I will tell them
00:42:13it is a good thing
00:42:15to express your feelings
00:42:17to your family
00:42:19in a serious way
00:42:21that I am hurt
00:42:23I am not responsible for this
00:42:25Allah has made me like this
00:42:27instead of making me complex
00:42:29help me to make myself better
00:42:31once you say
00:42:33if you don't understand
00:42:35at least your feelings will come out
00:42:37then you focus on things
00:42:39like grooming
00:42:41Nida said in the break
00:42:43she knows so many actresses
00:42:45my complexion is not bad
00:42:47I am very comfortable
00:42:49with my complexion
00:42:51beautiful complexion
00:42:53but
00:42:55now I have understood
00:42:57that skin is not a matter of complexion
00:42:59or tone
00:43:01if your skin is healthy
00:43:03whether you are white or black
00:43:05you get attraction
00:43:07you get class
00:43:11in my family
00:43:13there are many people
00:43:15whose complexion is not fair
00:43:17but
00:43:19skin is glowing all the time
00:43:21there are many girls
00:43:23who are more polite than me
00:43:25Zippy's pedicure is very beautiful
00:43:27look at her skin
00:43:29she is an athlete
00:43:31she does gym
00:43:33she eats healthy
00:43:35there are many actresses
00:43:37like Sunita Patil
00:43:39and many Pakistani actresses
00:43:45Maria Basti
00:43:47Sunita Marshall
00:43:49you are so attractive
00:43:51but Nida
00:43:53why did you feel bad inside?
00:43:57when you will feel
00:43:59I have beautiful complexion
00:44:01I have seen many women
00:44:03their confidence
00:44:05is their beauty
00:44:07let me tell you one thing
00:44:09when your parents
00:44:11give you confidence
00:44:13when you are growing up
00:44:15they are the reason
00:44:17for your complexion
00:44:19I have my parents genes
00:44:21whatever I have got
00:44:23from my ancestors
00:44:25first thing is
00:44:27they have no right
00:44:29to say
00:44:31you can't change the perception
00:44:33of the world
00:44:35you can't change the way of thinking
00:44:37you can change your way of thinking
00:44:39very beautiful
00:44:41if I think
00:44:43my clothes are bad
00:44:45I will come to complex
00:44:47if I think
00:44:49I have bought it with my choice
00:44:51this shawl is 25 years old
00:44:53I love it so much
00:44:55I wear it with pride
00:44:57when you take pride of your complexion
00:44:59when you take pride of your personality
00:45:01then no one
00:45:03will have the courage
00:45:05you are my favorite
00:45:07you have to say this
00:45:09I am your favorite
00:45:11so
00:45:13that complexion
00:45:15is also good for others
00:45:17I have seen many families
00:45:19that complexion girl
00:45:21she is so good in studies
00:45:23she is so good in skills
00:45:25she is so good in life
00:45:27and Nida
00:45:29if you have
00:45:31come ahead in your career
00:45:33then no one will ask
00:45:35what is your height
00:45:37your personality shines
00:45:39so that thing
00:45:41first love yourself
00:45:43then love others
00:45:45mom and dad love
00:45:47they have manufacturing
00:45:49they love
00:45:51but sometimes parents are not sensible
00:45:53they make complex children
00:45:55our society is like that
00:45:57if we go for marriage
00:45:59then we need fair girl
00:46:01they will not see how educated she is
00:46:03her habits
00:46:05like we are three
00:46:07when a baby is about to be born
00:46:09there is a pressure
00:46:11will it be colored on mom or dad
00:46:13after birth knees and elbows are checked
00:46:15and fingers are checked
00:46:17I have seen in many families
00:46:19whether the child is fair or not
00:46:21or on whom the color is going
00:46:23we have left it with us
00:46:25and we have given our fear to them
00:46:27for example we have three sisters
00:46:29my middle sister
00:46:31she has always been obese
00:46:33and we have
00:46:35called her fat
00:46:37but one day
00:46:39she got serious
00:46:41and said I feel bad
00:46:43but she is the same sister
00:46:45who is everyone's favorite
00:46:47mom and dad's favorite
00:46:49our favorite
00:46:51there is a lot inside
00:46:53which is not there in us
00:46:55she is more intelligent
00:46:57she has more skills than us
00:46:59she is more sensible
00:47:01she has more empathy
00:47:03more kindness
00:47:05there are so many qualities
00:47:07she is our guide
00:47:09she is our guide
00:47:11the whole family's exhaust
00:47:13is from her
00:47:15she has made herself like this
00:47:17there are many members of the family
00:47:19this is fat, this is obese
00:47:21this is crooked
00:47:23don't keep their names
00:47:25this is very wrong
00:47:27you are absolutely right
00:47:29we have called her fat all her life
00:47:31one day she made us understand
00:47:35did you understand or not?
00:47:37we understood
00:47:39the way she made us understand
00:47:41like she is saying that they should also speak
00:47:43because we don't know
00:47:45that others are feeling so bad
00:47:47they keep on taunting
00:47:51if she is feeling bad
00:47:53then she needs to express her feelings
00:47:55we had an uncle
00:47:57now he is dead
00:47:59we used to call him Pappu
00:48:01when he grew up
00:48:03we used to call him Pappu
00:48:05he used to be so embarrassed
00:48:07but now he is famous
00:48:09Pappu is right
00:48:11Pappu is not bad
00:48:13Pappu is a lovely face
00:48:15now instead of Nana Dada
00:48:17we have Pappu Dada, Pappu Nanu
00:48:19there are many elders in your family
00:48:21who are called Gudiya Waji
00:48:23who are called baby
00:48:25so many names
00:48:27next
00:48:29Rashid
00:48:31Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:48:33Assalam-o-Alaikum
00:48:35thank you so much for giving me a chance
00:48:37to say what is in my heart
00:48:39I am a retired person
00:48:41and I have spent all my life
00:48:43I have never laid my hands on anyone
00:48:45and I have tried
00:48:47that such a time never comes
00:48:49I have spent all my life
00:48:51working hard for my children
00:48:53for their education, for their health
00:48:55for their marriage
00:48:57to make their life settled
00:48:59I have spent all my life
00:49:01and I have always thought
00:49:03that when I retire
00:49:05I will live a peaceful life
00:49:07but for my retirement
00:49:09I have not done anything
00:49:11and
00:49:13now the situation is
00:49:15that my wife has passed away
00:49:17from this world
00:49:19and now I am alone
00:49:21and my children are busy in their own lives
00:49:23now
00:49:25if I have to go out
00:49:27to pray
00:49:29and if I feel like
00:49:31buying something
00:49:33like fruits or dry fruits
00:49:35or anything necessary
00:49:37even for my medicines
00:49:39I feel ashamed
00:49:41when I say this to my children
00:49:43that I wish I had done something for myself
00:49:45some time ago
00:49:47I asked my son
00:49:49for Rs. 500
00:49:51and he gave it to me
00:49:53after a month or two
00:49:55I asked him
00:49:57did you spend it?
00:49:59I felt very sorry
00:50:01for the children
00:50:03for whom our parents
00:50:05and people like us
00:50:07have supported
00:50:09I have spent all my youth
00:50:11and all my life on them
00:50:13to make them happy
00:50:15and to enjoy
00:50:17my retirement life
00:50:19I have spent my life
00:50:21today all those children
00:50:23are busy in their own lives
00:50:25Alhamdulillah Allah kept them happy
00:50:27but it always happens in this world
00:50:29that children forget their parents
00:50:31that how hard they worked
00:50:33how much
00:50:35they struggled
00:50:37they didn't feel the sun or rain
00:50:39and today
00:50:41I am standing here and thinking
00:50:43that there is no solution to this problem
00:50:45there is no retirement in Islam
00:50:47but we are living a retired life
00:50:49and we have no other option
00:50:51but to spend our life
00:50:53and wait for it
00:50:55so this is what I wanted to say
00:50:57to all of you
00:50:59to spend your life
00:51:01but for your last time
00:51:03for your last era
00:51:05make something
00:51:07tell us about this
00:51:09what can we do
00:51:11if something is possible
00:51:13people have
00:51:15different perceptions
00:51:17some say don't think about tomorrow
00:51:19look at today
00:51:21who has seen tomorrow
00:51:23live or die
00:51:25some are worried
00:51:27what will happen to our old age
00:51:29when we won't be able to work
00:51:31what will happen
00:51:33people are confused
00:51:35what definition
00:51:37or life perception should we trust
00:51:39come to the middle
00:51:41don't go to the extreme
00:51:43don't think about tomorrow
00:51:45don't think about tomorrow
00:51:47don't think about today
00:51:49somewhere between
00:51:51look at today
00:51:53and for tomorrow
00:51:55save something
00:51:57what we are talking about
00:51:59it's a painful thing
00:52:01for kids
00:52:03if kids say
00:52:05we are just listening
00:52:07they are suffering
00:52:09so
00:52:11for them
00:52:13don't think
00:52:15my life is over
00:52:17till my last breath
00:52:19you have to live
00:52:21you can spend your life
00:52:23or find something
00:52:25to make it better
00:52:27how can I make it better
00:52:29how can I enjoy it
00:52:31any groups
00:52:33for old age
00:52:35community work
00:52:37where I can spend my time
00:52:39make connections
00:52:41make friends
00:52:43one thing
00:52:45I want to say
00:52:47generally
00:52:49our parents think
00:52:51we will spend all our money on kids
00:52:53and they see kids as a retirement plan
00:52:55it's not necessary
00:52:57kids think
00:52:59we will take care of parents
00:53:01when we grow up
00:53:03don't think kids as a retirement plan
00:53:05for retirement
00:53:07save something
00:53:09don't spend everything on kids
00:53:11make kids independent
00:53:13I want to say
00:53:15sorry
00:53:17our society
00:53:19our country
00:53:21you are feeding 25 year old kids
00:53:23he is studying
00:53:25he is living with his parents
00:53:27his parents are taking care of him
00:53:29he is studying
00:53:31he is a kid
00:53:33he is studying
00:53:35he is not set for 28 years
00:53:37his parents are getting him married
00:53:39we have made our kids
00:53:41poor
00:53:43we have put all our savings
00:53:45on our kids
00:53:47it's not like that in west
00:53:4914 year old
00:53:51kids are allowed to do job
00:53:53after that
00:53:55in 18 years
00:53:57you can find a job
00:53:59they are studying
00:54:01they are working part time
00:54:03they are saving
00:54:05their old age is peaceful
00:54:07they are not spreading hands
00:54:09in front of their kids
00:54:11one thing
00:54:13in our society
00:54:15parents struggle a lot
00:54:17to fulfill their needs
00:54:19they don't bond with their kids
00:54:21they don't befriend with their kids
00:54:23these are the kids
00:54:25who don't ask their parents
00:54:27if you have a good bonding
00:54:29with your kids
00:54:31even if you can't fulfill their needs
00:54:33they will still feel you
00:54:35they will be emotionally attached
00:54:37they will not do this
00:54:39this is a very important point
00:54:41there is a percentage
00:54:43for people like us
00:54:45how much guilt free
00:54:47we have put on our kids
00:54:49how much guilt free
00:54:51we have put on our kids
00:54:53even if I imagine
00:54:55I feel like
00:54:57Hamza's right will not be fulfilled
00:54:59or he will be left with something
00:55:01if we save for ourselves
00:55:03how do you make that line
00:55:05how do you draw that line
00:55:07be realistic
00:55:09needs vs desires
00:55:11these two things
00:55:13fulfill your needs
00:55:15needs and desires
00:55:17so needs will always be above desires
00:55:19you are fulfilling your desires
00:55:21by killing your needs
00:55:23you are harming yourself
00:55:25do you know what happens
00:55:27sometimes parents
00:55:29when they have kids
00:55:31they have some deprivations
00:55:33which are not being fulfilled
00:55:35they see their deprivations in their kids
00:55:37and they over provide them
00:55:39if they have money
00:55:41give it to the kids
00:55:43they spoil their kids
00:55:45they don't let them be thirsty
00:55:47to earn
00:55:49one more important point
00:55:51apart from this
00:55:53your body
00:55:55will support you till the end
00:55:57apart from everyone
00:55:59so invest in your body
00:56:01you don't have to spend money
00:56:03if you exercise a little
00:56:05walk a little
00:56:07our old people
00:56:09after retirement
00:56:11they will be saved
00:56:13if this healthy habit
00:56:15will be with you till the end
00:56:17you will be at peace
00:56:19you won't go into depression
00:56:21you will be saved
00:56:23I will talk about their case
00:56:25you have given a lot of good advice
00:56:27that
00:56:29work for charity
00:56:31it gives you a lot of peace
00:56:33you get rid of your personality
00:56:35your needs
00:56:37the world will be different
00:56:39there is no problem
00:56:41their necessities are not being fulfilled
00:56:43what they want
00:56:45their son should make pocket money
00:56:47so that
00:56:49their hands are not in front of him
00:56:51like we are doing for our kids
00:56:53if a lot of kids are watching us
00:56:55instead of
00:56:57parents spreading their hands
00:56:59you make a fixed pocket money
00:57:01it is an ideal situation
00:57:03it is an ideal
00:57:05now their kids
00:57:07they ask you
00:57:09where is the money
00:57:11let me tell you one more thing
00:57:13if you have 4 kids
00:57:15and you live with one
00:57:17who is well established
00:57:19the parents
00:57:21take money from the good kids
00:57:23and give it to the weak kids
00:57:25in most of the families
00:57:27this happens
00:57:29sometimes the established kid
00:57:31says I gave money for you
00:57:33where did they go
00:57:35these are the factors
00:57:37because the weak kids
00:57:39the parents always support them
00:57:41I have seen it practically in my life
00:57:43so that is the thing
00:57:45this is a big lesson
00:57:47this is not just a story of a house
00:57:49as you said
00:57:51this is a story of many houses
00:57:53lets take a short break
00:57:55good morning pakistan
00:58:05welcome
00:58:07welcome back
00:58:09good morning pakistan
00:58:11all the heartfelt words
00:58:13the one that hurt us the most
00:58:15was the last one
00:58:17and sometimes
00:58:19when you hear someone
00:58:21you feel sad
00:58:23you hear a news
00:58:25your whole day goes bad
00:58:27but again
00:58:29lets take it on a positive note
00:58:31the people who are here
00:58:33you have put so many people
00:58:35in a difficult situation
00:58:37people who don't have health
00:58:39exactly
00:58:41you are on your feet
00:58:43you are on your feet
00:58:45and all the elders
00:58:47I will tell them
00:58:49don't rely on yourself
00:58:51as much as parents love their children
00:58:53they don't love their children
00:58:55she will love her children
00:58:57yes she will
00:58:59whatever happens to her children
00:59:01she will go crazy
00:59:03but as much as parents
00:59:05love their children
00:59:07they can't love their children
00:59:09unconditional love
00:59:11exactly
00:59:13we have with us
00:59:15nabiha
00:59:17salam nabiha
00:59:19we are ready to listen to your heart
00:59:21salam
00:59:23how are you?
00:59:25I am fine
00:59:27I am thankful to you
00:59:29that after a long time
00:59:31you have given me a chance
00:59:33to say what was hidden in my heart
00:59:35I want to share with you
00:59:37that
00:59:39I belong to a very good family
00:59:43my husband died
00:59:45when my son was one year old
00:59:47then it happened
00:59:49so I raised my son with a lot of love
00:59:51with a lot of hard work
00:59:53and it is not that I am from another family
00:59:55but my husband
00:59:57left a very good financial job
00:59:59for me
01:00:01which proved to be
01:00:03very helpful for me
01:00:05and I raised my son
01:00:07very well
01:00:09gave him a good education
01:00:11spent a good time
01:00:13I gave all my life to my son
01:00:15and spent time
01:00:17on his education
01:00:19today he has got a good job
01:00:21after a good education
01:00:23then
01:00:25he has chosen a girl
01:00:27and I got him married to her
01:00:29where he wanted
01:00:31both of them are very happy
01:00:33I look at them
01:00:35but as time goes by
01:00:37I feel very lonely
01:00:39when I see them
01:00:41laughing and playing
01:00:43talking to each other
01:00:45I start feeling jealousy
01:00:47I feel very restless
01:00:49when I see them
01:00:51and sometimes
01:00:53I scold them
01:00:55or I don't treat them well
01:00:59I feel very restless
01:01:01and sometimes
01:01:03I feel embarrassed
01:01:05but
01:01:07still
01:01:09I feel very restless
01:01:11and I want to separate them
01:01:13or do something
01:01:15negative thinking
01:01:17has started to increase
01:01:19but with time
01:01:21I will be able to
01:01:23separate my only son
01:01:25from me
01:01:27I don't understand
01:01:29why this is happening to me
01:01:31I don't like it
01:01:33sometimes I feel like
01:01:35apologizing to people
01:01:37but when I see them
01:01:39I feel like I will lose them
01:01:41so please tell me
01:01:43if this attitude
01:01:45is right
01:01:47or not
01:01:49I don't know
01:01:51I don't know
01:01:53I don't understand
01:01:55two sons got their mother married
01:01:57they were widows
01:01:59at a young age
01:02:01you must have seen in the news
01:02:03that a son got his mother married
01:02:05you need a partner
01:02:07I have seen
01:02:09that these type of women
01:02:11make their sister
01:02:13or someone who is lonely
01:02:15their partner
01:02:17stay together
01:02:19and
01:02:21they are right
01:02:23a lot of people are going through this
01:02:25they have the courage to
01:02:27say what is in their heart
01:02:29they don't say it
01:02:31but they make the whole house toxic
01:02:33because of these emotions
01:02:35and they feel bad
01:02:37about themselves
01:02:39first of all
01:02:41I will appreciate
01:02:43she is a very strong woman
01:02:45she said she feels jealous
01:02:47when she sees her son or daughter-in-law
01:02:49this is the first step towards healing
01:02:51this is the biggest thing
01:02:53they have realized
01:02:55a lot of people don't believe
01:02:57they keep blaming
01:02:59that my son took her
01:03:01they don't believe
01:03:03that this is my jealousy
01:03:05do you know what is the problem?
01:03:07you said you need a partner
01:03:09if we leave the partner
01:03:11you need a purpose in life
01:03:13she made her son
01:03:15the purpose of her life
01:03:17she didn't have anything
01:03:19other than her son
01:03:21when someone else
01:03:23joined her son's life
01:03:25she didn't have a place
01:03:27she has her own place
01:03:29but someone else joined her
01:03:31now she doesn't know
01:03:33where to go with
01:03:35her energy and emotions
01:03:37if her life was like
01:03:39she has a son
01:03:41she has other things
01:03:43even if she doesn't have a partner
01:03:45she has a purpose
01:03:47it is not necessary
01:03:49to have a career
01:03:51she has other things
01:03:53like family
01:03:55she has a hobby
01:03:57she has connections
01:03:59this is not for her
01:04:01she can develop
01:04:03I highly recommend her
01:04:05to contact a therapist
01:04:07they will help her
01:04:09to resolve
01:04:11her negative thinking
01:04:13sometimes I feel like
01:04:15apologizing
01:04:17this is a good step
01:04:19make your son and daughter-in-law
01:04:21talk to them
01:04:23and apologize
01:04:25they will understand
01:04:27they will help you
01:04:29when you apologize
01:04:31to them
01:04:33next time
01:04:35you will recall
01:04:37your reaction
01:04:39you know
01:04:41they will stop you
01:04:43this is a good thing
01:04:45tell me one thing
01:04:47if she had a daughter
01:04:49and she was happy
01:04:51with her husband
01:04:53would she have
01:04:55these thoughts?
01:04:57absolutely
01:04:59it doesn't matter
01:05:01if it is a son
01:05:03or daughter
01:05:05you have made her
01:05:07your life partner
01:05:09if you don't have her
01:05:11you are purposeless
01:05:13you don't know
01:05:15what to do
01:05:17there are many mothers
01:05:19who are very active
01:05:21they have a purpose
01:05:23this is my part
01:05:25but there is another part
01:05:27of my life
01:05:29sometimes
01:05:31there are children
01:05:33if they have these things
01:05:35then they get suppressed
01:05:37there are many purposes
01:05:39if there is a good news
01:05:41they will start
01:05:43taking care of them
01:05:45and if their daughter-in-law
01:05:47because many daughters-in-law
01:05:49want to take care of their children
01:05:51to discipline them
01:05:53so there are rifts
01:05:55you said a very good thing
01:05:57that partner
01:05:59is not a part of our culture
01:06:01it should be
01:06:03and we should change
01:06:05the taboos
01:06:07like a man
01:06:09can get married alone
01:06:11a woman should get married alone
01:06:13and children
01:06:15should get married
01:06:17it is a part of our religion
01:06:19but not a part of our culture
01:06:21absolutely
01:06:23it is a part of our religion
01:06:25but not a part of our culture
01:06:27because culture is adopted
01:06:29yes
01:06:31Hina, Assalam-o-Alaikum
01:06:33Assalam-o-Alaikum Nida ji
01:06:35how are you?
01:06:37Nida ji, thank you
01:06:39for giving us a platform
01:06:41where girls can
01:06:43talk about their feelings
01:06:45I have a big problem
01:06:47and it is a problem of our society
01:06:49when girls start earning
01:06:51then parents' attention
01:06:53is only on their earnings
01:06:55not on their personality
01:06:57my story starts
01:06:59when I was 19
01:07:01my father was in financial crisis
01:07:03and my two younger brothers
01:07:05were studying in a very good school
01:07:07they had a lot of fees
01:07:09my younger sister also had a lot of fees
01:07:11so I thought
01:07:13I will do a job
01:07:15so I started a job
01:07:17and while doing
01:07:19for 8 years
01:07:21I got a job
01:07:23in a multinational company
01:07:25gradually I progressed
01:07:27and I got promotions
01:07:29and the situation
01:07:31at home got better
01:07:33during this time
01:07:35I earned a lot of money
01:07:37but I lost my time
01:07:39or my parents
01:07:41didn't pay attention to me
01:07:43all the girls who were with me
01:07:45my friends, my cousins
01:07:47all of them got married
01:07:49now I go to any event
01:07:51now my age is 28
01:07:53when I go to any event
01:07:55girls taunt me
01:07:57my cousins
01:07:59that when are you getting married
01:08:01when are you getting married
01:08:03it is not that
01:08:05I didn't get proposals
01:08:07or I am not acceptable
01:08:09or I have any shortcomings
01:08:11I got a lot of proposals
01:08:13and they are still coming
01:08:15but every time my mother
01:08:17makes some excuse
01:08:19sometimes she says
01:08:21no, I have put some committees
01:08:23sometimes she says
01:08:25this time
01:08:27a very good proposal
01:08:29came from my friend's reference
01:08:31he was abroad
01:08:33he said we have to get married in 3 months
01:08:35so my mother
01:08:37simply said
01:08:39till I don't get married
01:08:41I will not get married
01:08:43I will not get married
01:08:45I will not get married
01:08:47I will not get married
01:08:49I will not get married
01:08:51I will not get married
01:08:53I will not get married
01:08:55I will not get married
01:08:57I will not get married
01:08:59I will not get married
01:09:01I will not get married
01:09:03I will not get married
01:09:05I will not get married
01:09:07I will not get married
01:09:09I will not get married
01:09:11I will not get married
01:09:13I will not get married
01:09:15I will not get married
01:09:17I will not get married
01:09:19I will not get married
01:09:21I will not get married
01:09:23I will not get married
01:09:25I will not get married
01:09:27I will not get married
01:09:29I will not get married
01:09:31I will not get married
01:09:33I will not get married
01:09:35I will not get married
01:09:37I will not get married
01:09:39I will not get married
01:09:41I will not get married
01:09:43I will not get married
01:09:45I think
01:09:4750% of the households
01:09:49are going through this
01:09:51So what should be done
01:09:53when they know
01:09:55that their own
01:09:57are doing this
01:09:59They are not sincere
01:10:01in this matter
01:10:03I will continue this point
01:10:05Like he said, give message to parents
01:10:07that they should not do this
01:10:09Whatever message we give to parents
01:10:11they also know that we are doing this
01:10:13They will not solve this
01:10:15because this is human nature
01:10:17They can see that
01:10:19my benefit is in this
01:10:21If I decide for this
01:10:23then I will be at loss
01:10:25They will not decide for you
01:10:27Think about it
01:10:29You are running the house financially
01:10:31Are you as helpless
01:10:33as you think you are
01:10:35You are more powerful
01:10:37You will have to stand for yourself
01:10:39Now you are saying
01:10:41that mothers make excuses
01:10:43You know that mothers make excuses
01:10:45So make your parents sit
01:10:47and talk to them
01:10:49Address their needs
01:10:51Tell them that I know
01:10:53that you are afraid
01:10:55that they will not support you
01:10:57If I get married
01:10:59Make an agreement with them
01:11:01Don't make a promise
01:11:03that you cannot fulfill
01:11:05I will support you
01:11:07but I have to get married
01:11:09I don't want any ifs and buts
01:11:11on this
01:11:13You have to be firm
01:11:15and stand for your rights
01:11:17A lot of parents
01:11:19will get married
01:11:21If they are not willing
01:11:23they will do something
01:11:25to change their relationship
01:11:27When you do a job
01:11:29and they say that
01:11:31you got a proposal
01:11:33from your friend
01:11:35then there is nothing wrong
01:11:37This is not the time
01:11:39when people feel bad
01:11:41that the girl is taking the lead
01:11:43You can take the lead
01:11:45If you think that
01:11:47you are suitable
01:11:49Not everyone can give
01:11:51their family information
01:11:53that their parents are afraid
01:11:55If you think that
01:11:57you are smart
01:11:59then give a hint
01:12:01that your parents are hesitant
01:12:03It is possible that
01:12:05if you are not able to convince
01:12:07your parents
01:12:09then you can
01:12:11convince your parents
01:12:13This is a good suggestion
01:12:15This can be helpful
01:12:17It is a good thing
01:12:19to involve a mediator
01:12:21The solution is
01:12:23to stand for your rights
01:12:25In our society
01:12:27if a boy says that
01:12:29he wants to get married
01:12:31then we are happy
01:12:33This is a bad thing
01:12:35The lesson here is
01:12:37that a joke is a joke
01:12:39So, a little drama
01:12:41is necessary
01:12:43We say to be patient
01:12:45Patience does not mean
01:12:47that you have to suffer
01:12:49Patience means
01:12:51that you have to stand for your rights
01:12:53Talk to them
01:12:55and address their fears
01:12:57Confront them
01:12:59and find a solution
01:13:01Don't delay
01:13:03Girls should not delay
01:13:05because
01:13:07it is a biological clock
01:13:09You have to become a mother
01:13:11at the right time
01:13:13You have to fulfill your family
01:13:15at the right time
01:13:17So, keep an eye on it
01:13:19All the compulsion will continue
01:13:21Time will not stop
01:13:23If your parents
01:13:25have a genuine need
01:13:27then you can understand
01:13:29that if I come
01:13:31then I will keep a certain
01:13:33part of my salary for my parents
01:13:35So, your partner
01:13:37will understand you
01:13:39Many girls do this
01:13:41But in many places
01:13:43they don't have to
01:13:45or they don't have to
01:13:47Then they can decide
01:13:49If you have options
01:13:51then you can
01:13:53keep your options
01:13:55There are some conditions
01:13:57No one is going to earn
01:13:59at home
01:14:01Parents are old
01:14:03Other sisters and brothers
01:14:05should start working
01:14:07early
01:14:09Thank you so much
01:14:11all three of you
01:14:13for listening to us
01:14:15and finding solutions
01:14:17which will
01:14:19benefit the general public
01:14:21Thank you so much
01:14:23Thank you ARY
01:14:25You do such productive programs
01:14:27through which
01:14:29a person can share
01:14:31through which many people
01:14:33can see the mirror
01:14:35and we can see
01:14:37what is happening in our society
01:14:39Thank you
01:14:41Good morning Pakistan
01:14:43Welcome
01:14:45Welcome back
01:14:47Good morning Pakistan
01:14:49Right now I have
01:14:51NK Herbal Products
01:14:53with me
01:14:55Noreen Khan
01:14:57who is the CEO of this brand
01:14:59Let's meet her
01:15:01and ask her about
01:15:03NK Herbal Products
01:15:05Assalamu Alaikum
01:15:07Walikum Assalam
01:15:09How are you?
01:15:11I am fine
01:15:13Let's start with
01:15:15NK Herbal Shampoo
01:15:17Oil and Hair Mask
01:15:19Tell us about it
01:15:21What is special about it
01:15:23and how can it benefit
01:15:25consumers
01:15:27It is chemical free
01:15:29Total herbal
01:15:31I make it myself
01:15:33If we talk about oil
01:15:35Argan Oil, Almond Oil
01:15:37Vitamin E and
01:15:39I make it with 29
01:15:41herbs
01:15:43It is beneficial
01:15:47Shampoo is 10% chemical
01:15:49and 90% chemical free
01:15:53It has 15
01:15:55herbs
01:15:57I add onions
01:15:59in Shampoo
01:16:01It has 15 herbs
01:16:03It is beneficial
01:16:05Hair mask
01:16:07is 50% chemical
01:16:09and 50% herbal
01:16:13You can apply
01:16:15shampoo and oil
01:16:17twice in a day
01:16:19But apply hair mask
01:16:21once in 15 days
01:16:23It is beneficial
01:16:25People use it daily
01:16:29It keeps your hair
01:16:31keratin for 15 days
01:16:33People of all ages
01:16:35can use it
01:16:37Children, old people
01:16:39and males and females
01:16:41can use it
01:16:43It is beneficial
01:16:47Is it helpful
01:16:49in preventing
01:16:51premature aging
01:16:53like premature white hair
01:16:55Yes
01:16:57It is very helpful
01:16:59Those who have white hair
01:17:01Those who have white hair
01:17:03very fast
01:17:05Those who have white hair
01:17:07naturally
01:17:09But those who have white hair
01:17:11prematurely
01:17:13When new hair
01:17:15comes, it turns black
01:17:19How do you know
01:17:21the results in a day?
01:17:23Hair fall
01:17:25results in a month
01:17:27In good hair
01:17:29we getč±”
01:17:31means
01:17:33the results in a day
01:17:35Is this the surgery
01:17:37and how it will work?
01:17:39I feel
01:17:43I feel
01:17:45But
01:17:47when there are
01:17:49bad them
01:17:51it depends
01:17:53It is not
01:17:55Three months ago, I got a message that my hair has grown back.
01:17:58So I told them to come and make a video.
01:18:00It's a matter of joy.
01:18:01Alhamdulillah.
01:18:02When someone benefits, it's a matter of great joy.
01:18:05And I try to make people benefit from what I have created in this world.
01:18:10And if I leave this world,
01:18:12I hope that I continue to benefit from it even after I die.
01:18:16What is the method of applying shampoo, hair mask or oil?
01:18:21Can you tell us a method?
01:18:22Yes, there is a proper method.
01:18:24You can easily find the method of applying oil on YouTube.
01:18:29Apply oil all night.
01:18:31And when you shampoo in the morning,
01:18:33you don't have to do it twice.
01:18:35You have to take the quantity of shampoo that you have to take once.
01:18:38Apply it on your head and leave it for a while.
01:18:40After that, when you wash your hair,
01:18:42when the shampoo comes out of your hair,
01:18:45you will see that it will become silky.
01:18:47And don't comb your wet hair.
01:18:49Many people comb their wet hair with a towel.
01:18:54When your hair is dry,
01:18:56comb your hair with your fingers.
01:18:58After that, comb your hair.
01:19:00This is the method.
01:19:02If you are using a hair mask,
01:19:04you can apply a hair mask on wet hair for 15 minutes.
01:19:08And you will see that the result will last for 15 days.
01:19:12If you use shampoo and oil,
01:19:14on the second or third day,
01:19:16when we use chemical products,
01:19:18our hair starts to get damaged.
01:19:20That is, oil starts to come in it.
01:19:22Because of that, the hair feels like it has not been washed.
01:19:25So, if you are washing your hair on the first day,
01:19:28on the second day, you will get a better result.
01:19:30On the third day, if you don't wash your hair for a week,
01:19:33it will feel like you washed it yesterday.
01:19:35Okay, tell me about soap.
01:19:37Alhamdulillah, the results of soap are also very good.
01:19:39It is made up of about 15 to 17 herbs.
01:19:42It contains all those things,
01:19:44like vitamin E, vitamin C.
01:19:46Is it for the body or for the face?
01:19:48It is for the face.
01:19:50The result is very good.
01:19:52Some people take it.
01:19:54They say, make it big for us,
01:19:56so that we can use it on the full body.
01:19:58So, these are the benefits of soap.
01:20:00Apart from this, if you check the wicks,
01:20:02the formulation of wicks is the same.
01:20:04But when I make wicks,
01:20:06I cook cloves in it.
01:20:08And I make it with that.
01:20:10If you smell it, you will realize
01:20:12how natural it is.
01:20:14That is, the wicks you are using,
01:20:16you can apply it to small children.
01:20:18You can apply it here.
01:20:20The quantity is also very little.
01:20:22You apply a little on your nose.
01:20:24What do I do myself?
01:20:26Sometimes it gets a little too much.
01:20:28Do you make all these things yourself?
01:20:30Alhamdulillah, I am making it myself.
01:20:32How long have you been making it?
01:20:34It's been 7 years since I've been making it.
01:20:36I started from home, from my family.
01:20:38How did you get it from your family?
01:20:40Did someone teach you?
01:20:42Grandfather and uncle are doctors.
01:20:44I used to work with them.
01:20:46Grandmother's hair was very long.
01:20:48My mother's hair is very long.
01:20:50She doesn't have a pillow yet.
01:20:52All of our sisters have very good hair.
01:20:54If I go to my family and see,
01:20:56the whole family's hair is very long.
01:20:58Everyone used to make it at home.
01:21:00Now the call comes,
01:21:02how much have you made,
01:21:04deliver it.
01:21:06Now Noreen is delivering it to everyone.
01:21:08So how can you buy it from Noreen?
01:21:10Is there a way?
01:21:12So how can you buy it from Noreen?
01:21:14Is there a way to place an order?
01:21:16The way is that
01:21:18you can order it online.
01:21:20The bulk quantity that you want to order
01:21:22is also here.
01:21:24We will not give a distribution.
01:21:26We will either sell it online or
01:21:28you can purchase the bulk quantity from us.
01:21:30This is our website.
01:21:32Our website is
01:21:34nkherbal.shop
01:21:36This is Herbal.
01:21:38You can contact them.
01:21:40Your order will be placed.
01:21:44Thank you so much Noreen.
01:21:46Chief of Avika and such good products.
01:21:48NK Herbal Products.
01:21:50Thank you so much for
01:21:52sharing your knowledge with people.
01:21:54Thank you so much.
01:21:56This was our today's program.
01:21:58We hope that you also
01:22:00heard the words of these people.
01:22:02If you also want to
01:22:04get your exhaust
01:22:06or catharsis out,
01:22:08it is important to know
01:22:10such a person so that
01:22:12your life can get better
01:22:14and you don't
01:22:16come out of this world with any disease.
01:22:18Good morning Pakistan.
01:22:20Khuda Hafiz.