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Handsome Hank | Viva TV
Transcript
00:00We're playing Jeopardy! hosted by Stephen Che. White Sox Dave, Mincey, and Jerry are the contestants.
00:06KB and Brandon are the announcers, so we try to get a wide variety of intelligence levels for this game.
00:12And then for the third round, we'll all have, like, say I have 1,500, he has 1,000, you have 500, you can wager that amount.
00:19Cool.
00:19So I can only wager a dollar, and only lose a dollar.
00:23Exactly, and it depends on, it's like risk how you're doing. Like, if you're way down, you gotta risk it all.
00:28Yeah, exactly.
00:29It's like a Hail Mary.
00:30Yeah.
00:30Do you need a laptop to be able to Google the answers?
00:33No, I don't.
00:33Oh, okay, cool.
00:34It's a smart thing.
00:35It's my experience.
00:35I'm gonna take a guess. I won't hit 200 on these. I won't get up to 200.
00:41There he is! He's our host!
00:43Alright.
00:43I wrote these questions. Take one of these by Monday. I wrote them Sunday at, like, 11pm, from, like, 11 to, like, 12.30.
00:51I don't remember any of these questions, so this is gonna be a surprise for everybody.
00:54There's gonna be an answer up there, and you guys are supposed to ask it as a question.
00:58So, Jerry, for number, for the first question.
01:00This is only going for the first time?
01:02No, it's for every, it's for every question. So, he's, it's gonna say jersey, player jersey numbers.
01:08They don't say it's a picture of Michael Jordan. I'm assuming it'll just have a, like, it'll be photoshopped out his number.
01:14You hit the button, you say, what is Michael Jordan's number?
01:17Or who is what?
01:17Or, say who is what.
01:19You don't just say 23? Who is 23, or what? I'm confused.
01:23Yes, exactly. Right. Yeah.
01:27Who goes first?
01:28That's a good question. Who does go first?
01:30You're, you're, why don't you just take charge, sir? Go by age, or height.
01:34Yeah, he's taller.
01:35I'm taller, actually. I can say that.
01:37I don't think you are.
01:38Yeah, you're taller.
01:39First time in my life, I can, not first time in my life, one of the first times in my life.
01:43And I can pick any category?
01:44Any category.
01:46But if I lose, you lose points.
01:48You can pick category first. Let's open the bell.
01:50Let's open, yeah.
01:51And then, you guys hit the bell. But if I hear whoever hits the bell second, if he gets it wrong, then that person gets to,
01:57gets to try.
01:57And you get, if you miss it, if you, if you miss the question, you get negative the amount of money.
02:03Correct.
02:03Hello, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the Barstool Stadium. It's Barstool Jeopardy today.
02:09I am Brandon Walker, along with Kyle Bauer.
02:11We have three of the smartest and sharpest minds at barstoolsports.com,
02:17and they're going to be doing a trivia game in just a second, hosted by Stephen Chayne.
02:20This is the home state of Barstool track, Dave.
02:25Ah, you don't have to do that, it was Jeopardy.
02:27I'm late.
02:28Dave.
02:29Dave.
02:29Fuck, it's him.
02:31It was definitely Dave right there.
02:418,966.
02:44White Sox Dave gets it.
02:47Wow.
02:48White Sox Dave is our winner.
02:51Congratulations, Dave.
02:53I didn't do anything.
02:56What's up, you guys?
02:57We're going to do another daily fit check with Anika.
02:59Today, it's really cozy, so I'm wearing my Legends Kenzie pullover.
03:03Oh, I'm so jealous.
03:04I need this one.
03:05I have the Milo Crop Tee on, also from Legends.
03:08Hey, I love that jacket.
03:10Do a fit check, do a fit check.
03:11Fit check, fit check.
03:12All right.
03:12My jacket is the Legends Sherpa, and I'm actually wearing the Legends joggers.
03:17Legends is the best.
03:18It's made and designed by athletes for people like us.
03:21Oh, my God.
03:21I love it so much.
03:22Wait, Mincy, come and do a fit check with us.
03:24Come on.
03:26Wait, Mincy, you're the only one not wearing Legends.
03:29We got to fix this.
03:30Ben, if you head over to the Legends website, it's 30% off site wide for Black Friday.
03:35Go get some Legends.
03:37Don't miss out.
03:38Go to Legends.com right now.
03:4030% off starting Black Friday.
03:42Get it now before the good stuff sells out.
03:45I want one of those shirts.
03:47Okay, I'll get you one.
03:47You sold like under 20.
03:49I put up a shirt.
03:50I've never sold less than 50 the first day.
03:5319 the first day.
03:54Look, it has Ashley on it.
03:56500 fucking people should have this because of Ashley.
03:59But it has Big Cat.
04:00It has Jersey Jerry.
04:02It has the stunning fabulous Ashley.
04:04It has my big fat face with cum on it.
04:07Buy, buy, buy.
04:07There's no Cyber Monday, but there's Cyber Stewie.
04:10Just buy this shirt.
04:12It supports the same people.
04:14It pays the same bills.
04:16Let's go.
04:19I'm trying to sell the shirt.
04:21I've never sold less than 50 shirts my first day.
04:2419 shirts sold.
04:2519 shirts?
04:27Oh, yeah.
04:27Oh, yeah.
04:28I have the sports cup that I was in.
04:29Isn't that a great shirt?
04:30It is a great shirt.
04:31I don't know why people are not buying it.
04:33What's the most in a year?
04:34Have I sold?
04:35Yeah.
04:36The first shirt we ever sold was like 700.
04:38What was last year?
04:39What are we working off?
04:40What are we trying to beat?
04:41300.
04:42Okay.
04:42And I always just leave it in one of these buckets.
04:44So yeah, someone came in and took it.
04:47That's seven years I've worn that.
04:51At the end of an era.
04:52Put that on.
04:53Now you're going to tell me someone's going to know.
04:55No.
04:56People are going to be going insane.
05:00That's bad.
05:00People are knocking a lot.
05:01No.
05:02Hey, Tommy.
05:03Oh, wait.
05:03You see the big news?
05:04What?
05:04I lost my fedora.
05:05It's just gone.
05:07What happened?
05:08I don't know.
05:08Someone took it.
05:09Oh, yeah.
05:09Go ahead.
05:09Just take my coat.
05:10What are you talking about?
05:11This is yours?
05:12That's yours?
05:13What?
05:13I wore this last week.
05:15But that's not yours.
05:16That's your coat.
05:18No, no.
05:18You take it.
05:19But that's not your coat.
05:19Mr. Phil.
05:21This is your coat?
05:22How big is this coat?
05:23I don't know.
05:23Probably your size.
05:24My size.
05:25Same size.
05:26You're taller.
05:26We're not the same size.
05:29Is this your coat?
05:30I don't know.
05:31You want it?
05:32Then take it.
05:33What do you think?
05:34Why don't you go blue?
05:35It's the worst one on the whole thing.
05:37Why?
05:38I'm going to look like a blueberry.
05:41That's perfect.
05:44Yeah.
05:45Yeah, we look good.
05:47Yeah, we look great.
05:47We look good.
05:48We look funny together.
05:49My mini me.
05:50It's my blueberry.
05:51Genesis had a talk with me yesterday.
05:52I got to lose a couple pounds.
05:54Yeah?
05:54I need to lose like $15, $20.
05:57I have to.
05:57I got a new salad deal.
05:58I never eat lunch.
06:00$20,000 salad deal.
06:02What?
06:02$20,000 salad deal.
06:04What?
06:04Farmer's fridge.
06:06They give you money?
06:07They're going to give me $20, yeah.
06:08How many side deals do you have?
06:10I got to eat, yeah.
06:11I feel like you're making more money than me now.
06:13No, no, no, no, no, no.
06:14Yeah.
06:16Yeah.
06:17That's hitting January 1st.
06:18Does anybody know the story of Marcus Luttrell?
06:21Yes.
06:21The Navy SEAL.
06:22Yes.
06:24There was a whole movie about him.
06:25Yeah.
06:26Yes, everything is fake.
06:28What do you mean?
06:28I don't know.
06:29I've been under these rabbit holes and shit.
06:31He, he's a coward.
06:33He left his people.
06:34Oh, I didn't know that.
06:36Uh, poop much, Caitlin?
06:37Does she ever stop shitting?
06:39I send my toilet paper to the office accidentally every single time.
06:42No!
06:43I'm subscribed to toilet paper on Amazon because I'm too embarrassed to buy it in the store.
06:49What?
06:49Why?
06:50Because it's just like you're admitting that like you-
06:52You shit?
06:53Yeah.
06:53I haven't changed that it gets sent here.
06:55So it's just more embarrassing.
06:56Why don't you just like-
06:57I'll try not to.
06:58I want my asshole to heal and just scab off.
07:00Yeah.
07:01I don't want it.
07:02Don't eat it.
07:03Oh, for the Capri Sun challenge is at the end,
07:06the winning team is going to compete within themselves to see who can chug a Capri Sun the fastest.
07:10Okay.
07:10World record's 8.2 seconds.
07:12Today we have the cars.com world record stream.
07:15I came up with a bunch of actual world records that we're going to try and break today.
07:20And it's going to be two teams trying to break the records.
07:22So I have team new versus used, the youngs versus the olds.
07:24The final winner gets the cars.com spot, the VIP cars.com spot.
07:28Not to brag, I had the spot the other month and it was like the best one of my life here.
07:32I'm not gonna lie.
07:32We have another world record that's going to be going today.
07:35And it's the longest Ben Mintz ramble about Ben Mintz by Ben Mintz.
07:41And that will be taking place in the cars.com parking spot.
07:44So while all that's happening in the gym,
07:46he will be out there talking about himself for, could be forever.
07:50I don't know.
07:51I know he can go for quite some time.
07:53So we're going to see how, we're going to see how that goes.
07:56Maybe he'll win.
07:59What are these balloons for?
08:03I believe they are for the record breaking stream, for stool streams.
08:09Kate is putting them together.
08:11So I'm not exactly sure what we're in store for,
08:14but I saw Jacob over here struggling and he said he had to blow up 200 of them.
08:19So I said, you know what?
08:21I'll, I'll do a little intent later this morning.
08:23I'll help my friend out.
08:29It's kind of crazy.
08:30How it just like sticks to my hair.
08:32This might be a world record right here.
08:33There's actually a world record for longest run with balloon on face.
08:37And it's like two miles or something.
08:38I could maybe walk it.
08:40Go like this.
08:47Needs more butt crack.
08:48They're saying at home and Rudy got put on the young team.
08:50I'm two years younger than Rudy.
08:51Oh, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa.
08:52We need to trade.
08:53I'm just going to, I'm just going to say this is fair.
08:55Cause I look older than Rudy.
08:57You do look gray.
08:58Oh yeah.
08:59I got plenty of gray.
09:01I want that.
09:01Max is 29.
09:02I'm 31.
09:04I stay getting away with it in terms of the age thing.
09:06I'm old as fuck.
09:09Records.
09:11I think I've accidentally done.
09:12I held my shit for two months once in college.
09:15Wasn't there?
09:15Right, right, right, right.
09:16Wait, wait, wait, hold on.
09:16Go back to this.
09:17You didn't shit for two months.
09:19I used to, I used to only shit once every other week when I would go home from college.
09:22You know, like when some people are like sprinting to the bathroom to have to shit.
09:25I've trained myself.
09:26I can fall asleep with that feeling.
09:27Oh my God.
09:29That's gotta be like extremely bad.
09:33Every time I shit emergency.
09:34One time I had a scare because my asshole healed over.
09:37It just healed.
09:38You know, it's a hole.
09:39It's scabbed over, healed.
09:40And I picked off the scab, it was gone.
09:42Did you start like in some part just shitting through your mouth?
09:45No, I had to go get a new one perforated, dude.
09:46Can we get Mincy more layers somehow?
09:49This is going to be too cold.
09:50What?
09:51He's outside.
09:52Oh.
09:53He's saying he won't be able to do it because it's going to be too cold.
09:55I'll just say like, I mean, it's an hour.
09:58It's going to be extremely.
10:00Yeah.
10:01It's like 30 mile an hour in Seltzer.
10:02Like I was just out there.
10:03We put him in one of those race car suits.
10:0544.
10:07It's 44.
10:08Yeah, just come in whenever you get too cold.
10:10I think we do have a bunch more layers and stuff you could put on.
10:12I promise I'll give it a good effort.
10:13Let me go get you a couple more layers.
10:15And then whenever you get cold.
10:16I need something right on my head.
10:18Okay.
10:18I said like 10 times, I'm like, go to the costume closet.
10:21He's got some warm stuff to wear.
10:22He's like, I guess I'll just be cold or not.
10:25I'm like, dude, you're a grown ass man.
10:27Go find some fucking layers.
10:29We have 10,000 clothes around here.
10:31I love you, Mincy.
10:31But Jesus Christ, dude, you had a full week.
10:34You can look at the weather.
10:35You're like 40 years old.
10:36Holy shit.
10:37But that's okay.
10:38God bless him.
10:39I mean, this is really bad.
10:40Okay, come in.
10:41Okay, come inside, Mincy.
10:42It's okay.
10:43He had a whole week.
10:43Do you want him to even start out there?
10:45Huh?
10:45He can't.
10:46He says he can't do it.
10:48I'll switch with him.
10:49If he started out there, we could turn it into a bit of him leaving.
10:53Yes, that's fine.
10:54He promised he can go for longer than anybody could ever imagine.
10:57And then he gets cold and leaves like after two minutes.
10:59Yeah.
10:59What we're going to do is you're going to do it like normal.
11:02Just start talking.
11:03And then we're going to make a bit of you leaving because you're too cold.
11:06So just keep talking.
11:07And then when we tell you, you're going to be like, fuck this.
11:09I'm too cold.
11:09And then you leave.
11:10Right.
11:11Well, you know, don't say fuck, but just say it's too cold.
11:13I can't do this anymore.
11:14Yeah.
11:14And then they'll turn it into a bit.
11:16Sound good?
11:17Great.
11:18All right.
11:19So now get the mic again.
11:20This is going to be rough for the Louisiana boy.
11:22Now my chair's gone.
11:25Just stay like this right now.
11:26All right.
11:37All right.
11:42Three, two, one.
11:46Hold it, baby.
11:48Hold it.
11:50Five.
11:52Get out of this kitchen.
11:5612.
11:58Wow.
12:00Four, three, two, one.
12:06Go.
12:08You didn't count.
12:10You didn't count.
12:12Go, T.
12:14Good.
12:16I can't do this anymore.
12:18You're gone.
12:20You got him?
12:22Yeah.
12:24Yeah.
12:26Yeah.
12:28Yeah.
12:30Yeah.
12:32Yeah.
12:34Yeah.
12:36All right.
12:38Well, then help me take him off.
12:40You got it.
12:42Come on.
12:44Oh, it's getting hot.
12:46It's getting hot.
12:48One, two.
12:50Come on, three.
12:52Six, 12.
12:54Go.
12:56Hey, fuck you, Nick.
12:58Fuck you, Nick.
13:00I'm a beast.
13:03He's destroying it.
13:05He's almost done his pouch.
13:07Juice dribbling all over Nicky Smoke.
13:09Oh, my God.
13:11Oh, my God.
13:13Oh, my God.
13:15Holy shit.
13:17I could have told you she was going to win that one.
13:19Let's check on Ben Minz while we tally these up.
13:21What's up, Brett?
13:23What's up, man?
13:25Nice to meet you.
13:27Nice to meet you, man.
13:29Welcome, welcome, welcome.
13:31This is the spot.
13:33Oh, nice.
13:35You play golf?
13:37Golf plays me.
13:39Okay.
13:41Oh, nice.
13:43Yeah, it's pretty sick, right?
13:45Yeah, it's nice, super nice.
13:47This is Brandon Walker, big Mississippi State guy.
13:49How you doing, man?
13:51Same time as you.
13:53Well, you know, it's dark times for us right now.
13:55We got to get Coach Levy just a change.
13:57You like him?
13:59He's from the D.C. area.
14:01He had Liberty in the right direction,
14:03but I think he got a rude awakening in that SEC.
14:05Yeah, I know. We're behind.
14:07We got to get some money flowing.
14:09We got to go down there and get that NIL going.
14:11I'm on it.
14:13I started a podcast giving all the money to NIL.
14:15And I want to go back and throw some golf tournaments
14:17and concerts and stuff.
14:19That's what we're doing.
14:21So let's get it done.
14:23Good to see you, man.
14:25They're going to put this at the start of the championship DVD.
14:27Holy shit, how'd that happen?
14:29This is Steven. Steven's our local Bucs fan.
14:31What's up, man?
14:33How you doing, man?
14:35I'm an original visitor of SmootSmack.com.
14:37You know I started Twitter.
14:39Don't nobody want to give me love for it.
14:41One of the original trash-talking websites.
14:43Yes, most definitely.
14:45SmootSmack.com
14:47Hi, man.
14:49Congratulations.
14:51I'm so excited.
14:53Number two.
14:55Steve, what's up, bro?
14:57How's it going?
15:01I love your office in there.
15:03It's fucking great.
15:05Isn't it crazy here?
15:07No, I'm talking about the museum in the back.
15:09It takes an asshole to do that.
15:11I did that.
15:13I created that.
15:15It's great. I love it, man.
15:17Two and a half hour drive in.
15:19Two hours and 28 minutes.
15:21Need a stipend.
15:23How you doing, man?
15:25It's going very hard out there.
15:27Was that a fun drive?
15:29Two hours and 28 minutes.
15:31Two and a half hours.
15:33Did you drive from Minneapolis?
15:35Damn.
15:37Which way did you go?
15:39From O'Hare.
15:41I did Waze. Waze was fine.
15:43Did you get your bagel?
15:45No, I didn't get it.
15:47Do you really believe in Russ?
15:49My Twitter bio.
15:51I do sports.
15:53My show, Jerrific Dark,
15:55also affiliated with another company, Diamond Recovery.
15:57I played golf with T.J. Watt.
15:59I'm the number one Russie rider.
16:01I used to smoke crack,
16:03but I'm sober now for nine years.
16:05Number one Russie rider.
16:07You know one thing about brother Russ, right?
16:09He'll take you up there,
16:11but he'll let you down, too.
16:13What's up, guys? Conor here.
16:15Let's have a day at the school, you know?
16:17Woo!
16:19There she is!
16:21There she is!
16:23I like it!
16:25There she is!
16:27Oh!
16:29Woo!
16:31Come on!
16:33Come on!
16:35Woo!
16:37Woo!
16:39Woo!
16:41Woo!
16:43Woo!
16:45Woo!
16:47Max! Max! Max!
16:49Max! Max! Max!
16:51Max!
16:53Good show!
16:55Tate's coming in.
16:57Woo!
16:59Woo!
17:01Woo!
17:03Woo!
17:05Woo!
17:07Woo!
17:09Woo!
17:11We should do that every morning.
17:13We should do that every morning.
17:15Danny, are you cold?
17:17Yeah, I'm a little cold. It's also picture day.
17:19I showed up with a pimple on my face.
17:21It's prom all over again. I'm hoping it's like
17:23how some models have the gap tooth. It makes them look hot.
17:25My flaws will just highlight
17:27that I'm just average looking outside of that.
17:29Chief conveniently,
17:31it was like, oh, Chief got a haircut this week.
17:33It's a hot haircut. I storm Normandy
17:35hair ass haircut.
17:37And then one week we're doing a fucking photo shoot.
17:39You know what Eddie called me yesterday?
17:41What? He called me Fat Andrew Schulz.
17:43It's not nice.
17:45Unfortunately, unfortunately
17:47that may be one of Dave's greatest.
17:49Step further out of the shot.
17:51How bad is this haircut?
18:07Did anybody order me an ugly sweater?
18:13Where's my sweater?
18:15My sweater.
18:17You ordered me an ugly sweater, right?
18:19Yeah, but if you want one,
18:21someone's going to have to give theirs up
18:23because they're all gone.
18:35Danny, the sweaters!
18:37Big thing, look out!
18:43Jacob!
18:45Big T!
18:47The ugly sweaters! Get a napkin!
18:49Get a napkin!
18:51You!
18:53What's wrong with you?
18:55He started it. He knows that I hate not having
18:57comfortable and festive and stylish
18:59and Christmassy and
19:01Look what you did, you little jerk!
19:03You! Upstairs!
19:05Now!
19:07Why? Why?
19:09Spider!
19:11Now! Instantly!
19:13You're such a diseased spider.
19:15You could have just gotten your own at the Barstool Sports Store.
19:17Say goodnight, spider.
19:19Goodnight, spider.
19:21Could have got more sweaters.
19:23Thanks for the tip, spider.
19:27The second floor? No!
19:29I hate the second floor. I hate my co-workers
19:31on the second floor.
19:33Well then maybe you should ask Santa for some new co-workers
19:35and a new sweater.
19:37I don't want a new office.
19:39I love co-workers. Co-workers suck!
19:41You get upstairs
19:43and I don't want to see you until after Cyber Monday.
19:45I don't want to see you or anyone else
19:47for the rest of my life.
19:51I hope you don't mean that.
19:53You'd be real sad if you woke up in the morning
19:55and all of us and the ugly sweaters were gone.
19:59No, I wouldn't.
20:05I hope I never hear from you jerks
20:08ever again.
20:10I'm going to store.barstoolsports.com
20:12to get my own ugly Christmas sweater.
20:38You
20:40You

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