Frasier Season 3 Episode 5 Kisses Sweeter Th An Wine
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00:00Roz, who's our last caller?
00:03On line two, we have Marilyn. She's feeling a little homesick.
00:07Go ahead, Marilyn.
00:08Well, I like living in Seattle, but I don't know.
00:12I grew up in this little town in Wisconsin, and I really miss that life.
00:17Well, you're not the only one.
00:19My producer, Roz, has regaled me with many stories of the great dairy state.
00:26You're from Wisconsin, Roz? What part?
00:28Bloomer.
00:30Oh, my God. I'm from Menominee.
00:32Oh, my God.
00:33No way. You're from Menominee. My cousins are from Menominee. Do you know they're Rayburn?
00:38Isn't that me?
00:39Billy Rayburn is your cousin?
00:42I used to work with him at Bell's Frozen Custard.
00:45Of course he did.
00:47Do you remember that guy that used to run the store? The guy with all the moles?
00:51Mr. T.T.
00:52Mr. T.T.
00:53Ladies, as fascinating as this is, I'm afraid we're out of time.
00:59Aww.
01:03That's okay, Marilyn. You can call back tomorrow.
01:05Be sure you'll all tune in tomorrow for part two in our series, Women of the Cheese Belt.
01:12Goodbye for now, and good mental health.
01:22These messages came for you earlier. Your wine is ready.
01:26Oh, excellent.
01:27You know, I'm hosting a tasting tonight for the wine club, Niles, that I belong to.
01:31I'm hoping they name me the Maître de Chez.
01:34Hey, it's a long-standing dream of mine to wear that silver cup around my neck.
01:40You know, back in Wisconsin, if a guy wore a cup around his neck, it'd mean he ticked off the gym teacher.
01:47Fine. Make sport, but this does have to be important to me.
01:52Since when? You used to say that club was nothing but a bunch of arrogant, cork-sniffing snob.
01:57Well, that was before I got here.
02:01Well, when I'm handing out bologna sandwiches this weekend at the homeless shelter,
02:06it will do my heart good to know that a bunch of wealthy men are swishing $200 bottles of wine
02:11and spitting it into silver buckets.
02:16Well, it's not like we don't recycle the bottles.
02:27There they are.
02:30Kings of six.
02:43Hmm. Big, full-bodied.
02:47Perhaps a bit baked.
02:49Essence of truffles.
02:52Long finish.
02:53Chambertin 76.
02:55Bravo, Fraser.
02:57If only your aim were as accurate, well...
02:59Oh, yeah.
03:01How is it those same taste buds can't tell the difference between me pot roast and me flank steak?
03:07Considering you learned to cook in England, it's a wonder I can tell you a flank steak from a braised tennis ball.
03:14Now, now, let's move on to the number seven.
03:17All right.
03:19Ah, touchable.
03:25A hint of current.
03:28A whisper of...
03:30What is that?
03:31What is that?
03:32Ah, ah, yes.
03:33Wet door.
03:36You guys still playing that stupid game?
03:39Dan, wine tasting is not a stupid game.
03:41It's a highly refined skill.
03:43Yeah, I just saw a couple of guys on the corner practicing out of paper bags.
03:51We are hardly winos.
03:53Very distinguished people belong to our club.
03:56The mayor, the commissioner of public safety, the chief of surgery at St. Luke's.
04:01Oh, just the people I'd want walking around all liquored up.
04:07Couldn't you find room for a school bus driver and a couple of air traffic controllers?
04:12Well, we could if they had impeccable taste.
04:18Which reminds me, Dad, I have a favor to beg.
04:21Would you mind if I moved your chair into your room until after the tasting?
04:26Forget it.
04:27You might as well ask me to stay in my room.
04:29Which takes care of the second favor.
04:36Oh, all right.
04:37Go ahead.
04:38Move it.
04:39At least you don't have to spend the night looking at your society pals getting tanked.
04:44All right, now, come on.
04:45Grab an ant.
04:45Oh, you're serious.
04:52You know I don't lift.
04:54Yeah.
04:55With that stick where it is, I'm surprised you can bend.
04:58Start hoisting.
05:02Come on.
05:03All right.
05:04Oh, my God.
05:05Oh, my God.
05:05Yeah, this thing.
05:06Wait, the time.
05:07Oh, my God.
05:09His room?
05:09All right.
05:10Yes.
05:10Oh, God.
05:11No, he knows.
05:12No, not.
05:13Don't stop it.
05:13Don't stop it.
05:14Hey!
05:15Oh.
05:16My gown?
05:17You better be talking about the floor.
05:19Oh, well, of course I am.
05:21Oh, for the peace sakes.
05:23Just one scratch.
05:24Give me a yellow magic marker.
05:26I'll color it in.
05:27Nobody will know the difference.
05:30Dad, you have no idea how critical these people can be.
05:32They love finding fault.
05:34We could put a rug over it.
05:40A rug.
05:41Where a rug doesn't belong.
05:44Why don't we just throw down a twister, Matt?
05:47Have a few rounds between vintages.
05:52Steady, Frazier.
05:52There's still hope.
05:54I'll bring my contractor by in the morning.
05:56Man's a genius.
05:57You know, it's time you boys learned everything doesn't have to be perfect.
06:00Yes.
06:01It's that kind of advice that leads to shag carpeting.
06:05Ah, good morning, Daphne.
06:13Extra pancakes for me this morning?
06:15I'm famished.
06:16Yes, well, you should have thought about that last night before you started making cracks
06:20about English cooking.
06:21I have hung up my spatula.
06:28Well, you move my chair.
06:31You cut off my pancake supply.
06:33Why don't you just back out over Eddie on your way to work making a hat trick?
06:37And a hat trick would be?
06:44That's in hockey where one...
06:45Enough said.
06:50All right.
06:50Morning, Frazier.
06:51I'm delivering one miracle worker as promised.
06:54Joe DiCarlo, Frazier Craig.
06:56It's a pleasure.
06:56And my father, Martin Craig.
06:57Hi, Joe.
06:58So where's the scratch?
06:59What?
07:00You mean you can't see it?
07:01Well, we're going to put some orange cones around it so nobody can fall on it.
07:09It's right here.
07:14I can get rid of that.
07:15It has to be done by five.
07:17My guests arrive at seven.
07:19So it has to be a firm five, not a 5.15, not a 5.30.
07:22I'll have it done by noon.
07:24Splendid.
07:25I told you he was good.
07:26Ah, we're talking about a man who satisfied Maris.
07:29It's something that's still regrettably on my to-do list.
07:37Coffee's ready.
07:39Of course.
07:40I'm sure it'll taste like me old bathwater to you.
07:43You know how it gets all grey and scummy around the edges with little flaxes?
07:49Oh, hello.
07:50Hi.
07:52Hello.
07:55I'd love some coffee, Daphne.
07:59Mmm, Daphne.
08:06Uh, Daphne, this is Joe DiCarlo.
08:09Joe, this is Daphne.
08:10She helps me out around here.
08:11Smells great.
08:13Colombian?
08:14Oh, no.
08:16English.
08:16The coffee.
08:25Costa Rican.
08:27Would you like a cup?
08:29Yeah, thanks.
08:30I'll be right back.
08:33He's adorable.
08:34Talk me up.
08:35Plate of pancakes?
08:36Deal.
08:37You know, uh, Joe, Daphne's a great gal.
08:43Oh, yeah.
08:43And, you know, she doesn't always go around in that ratty old bathrobe.
08:46Oh, no.
08:47Come on, man.
08:47She clings up real cute.
08:49Oh, yeah.
08:52You don't have to convince me.
08:54You know, I think Dad's right.
08:56You don't need to fix that scratch.
08:57It adds character.
08:58Come, Joe.
08:59Niles, forget it.
09:04Honeybun?
09:05Yes.
09:06Oh.
09:11Well, I'll be right back.
09:13Would you like one of these with your coffee?
09:15Oh.
09:16I'd love one.
09:17Oh.
09:18Anything else?
09:19No.
09:20Sugar.
09:21Yes.
09:23I meant in the coffee.
09:24Oh.
09:25You know, Maris is quite keen on gutting my library to make more space for her hats.
09:36Why don't you come home with me, and you can send one of your men over to do this little job.
09:41Bruce would be good.
09:42The large, sweaty gentleman with the chili dogs on his breath.
09:46Niles, Joe is here already, and we do have a deadline.
09:50But don't you think it would be prudent?
09:53Niles, it's settled.
09:54That's great.
09:55Because I'm kind of anxious to get at her.
09:59I'll just bet he is.
10:01Oh, the testosterone-driven tool.
10:04Niles!
10:04Niles!
10:05He's talking about the scratch.
10:07Oh.
10:08I knew that.
10:10I mean, I know that.
10:12I mean, watch him.
10:21Someone remodeling?
10:23Nope.
10:23Bad wiring in one of the condos.
10:25Ah.
10:26Well, I hope you gentlemen won't be working this evening.
10:29I'm entertaining some very important guests.
10:32You know how sound travels in this building.
10:35Eh, can't make any promises.
10:36We're here as long as this poor sap is willing to pay us.
10:40What is happening?
10:54Hold it down, guys.
10:55Uh, sorry about this, Dr. Crane, but when I plugged in the sander to start on the floor, you blew a circuit.
11:03So, naturally, you're sawing a hole into my wall.
11:07And the circuit blew the start of the fire.
11:10You got some real bad wiring in here.
11:12Right.
11:12How long?
11:13A couple hours.
11:14Now, a couple is vague.
11:16Uh, that would mean the big hand would be on the twelve and the little hand would be on the four.
11:23Oh, the four.
11:24Well, the four is okay.
11:25Fine.
11:26And you know the fire?
11:27And he smelled it first.
11:29Oh, well, he's a regular canary in a coal mine, isn't he?
11:36My God.
11:38What's going on?
11:39Don't ask, Niles.
11:40Oh, I see you've got the Romani Conti.
11:42Yes.
11:43But, unfortunately, they only had the one bottle.
11:45Oh, that's funny.
11:46The important told me he had two.
11:47Really?
11:48How strange.
11:55You know, if I didn't know you better, I would swear that you had squirreled one away for yourself.
12:01But then we both know that you must be telling the truth,
12:04because you're such a slave to your ethics that even the slightest transgression would cause your nose to bleed.
12:14Which it isn't.
12:18You just sniffed.
12:20I didn't sniff.
12:21It was a snort of contempt.
12:24A snort is out that was in.
12:28Oh, all right.
12:30The other bottle's in the car in my bowling bag.
12:34You have a bowling bag?
12:38Yes.
12:39Maris and I have taken to giving each other gag gifts.
12:44I gave her a cookbook.
12:48Oh, yoo-hoo.
12:52I, uh, noticed how your shirt was clinging to your back.
12:57Um, I thought a glass of iced tea might hit the spot.
13:03Thanks, Steph.
13:04Oh, I got a spark.
13:08Me too.
13:09That's just static electricity from the carpet.
13:11It can happen to anyone.
13:14I'll show you.
13:15What?
13:16Niles.
13:16Stop poking me!
13:28Should I put these little fingery foods for tonight in the fridge?
13:32Oh, yes, please.
13:33The brie is sweating up a storm.
13:35Let me help you with those.
13:36Uh, no.
13:37Daphne, uh, let me help you.
13:38Uh, excuse me, Bruce.
13:39Oh, jeez.
13:41Spark!
13:42Spark!
13:42Did you see the...
13:43Well, I will be back after work at 5.30.
13:52I hope I have your word that my apartment will be perfect by then.
13:58Okay.
13:58All right, all right.
13:59Think before you answer.
14:01This is not like marriage vows or a promise to a dying parent.
14:04This really, really counts.
14:05You have my word.
14:12Man, I am sweating like a pig.
14:15I gotta air myself out.
14:16Hey, hold the elevator, will you?
14:17I'm sorry.
14:18I need this nose tonight.
14:24You don't have to keep feeding these men.
14:26Actually, Maris finds they work faster if you keep them hungry.
14:31I don't.