The Wonton Don | The Wonton Don
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00:00Hey, sometimes life brings you a fork in the road.
00:02Yeah, we want to go that way.
00:03No, we came from this way.
00:04No, we didn't.
00:05No, because I said the exact same thing.
00:07We rolled down this way.
00:08Dude, we followed...
00:10Yeah, no, also, if you read the sign, it says that we're supposed to go this way.
00:14If we just blindly followed this down the wrong trail, we would be in a completely different parking lot.
00:25Just got a car from my father-in-law.
00:27First time I've owned a car in, like, seven years.
00:34I really just hope this doesn't make fun of my driving.
00:37The centerpiece of these videos is going to be accomplishing one specific hike.
00:42I've always wanted to, like, challenge myself maybe and go do, like, harder ones where, like, we talked about Everest or...
00:49There was that one documentary that came out of the guy who did those seven peaks.
00:53That was nuts.
00:55Oh, was that...
00:56That was the guy that you know.
00:57Yeah, that was the guy I went to Everest with.
01:00Come on.
01:01Are you talking about Nims?
01:02That's the guy.
01:03So I, like, hiked with his group up to Everest Base Camp.
01:07And then I didn't make it up to the summit.
01:09But then he took the rest of the people I was with all the way up to the summit.
01:12So when you said you didn't, like, did you not want to participate?
01:15Or did something happen when you were there where it was too dangerous or something?
01:18I just...
01:19I mean, the trip came up last minute.
01:21I don't think I was in any shape to climb Everest.
01:24And it's also very expensive.
01:27Especially Nims is so famous now that if you hike with him, it costs over 100k.
01:32Okay.
01:33So from where you were to get to Base Camp, how long of a hike is that?
01:36But we flew into this place, Lukla, which is where you start the hike.
01:40And then that hike from Lukla to Everest Base Camp, it takes between, like, five to seven days.
01:47Just to get to Base Camp?
01:49Just to get to Base Camp.
01:50So you...
01:51Okay, whoa.
01:51So the distance from the ground...
01:55I'll call it the ground floor...
01:56Yeah.
01:56...to Base Camp, is it, like, how much farther from Base Camp to the tip of Mount Everest?
02:01Like, you just basically do...
02:03Is it, like, double?
02:04I really have no idea.
02:05But once you get to Base Camp, it takes another month to get to the summit.
02:08Because you have to keep on hiking up and then hiking down.
02:11Yeah, you said to kind of get acclimated to the altitude.
02:13Yeah.
02:14That's incredible.
02:14Now, are they called shaman?
02:17Or no?
02:17A Sherpa.
02:18A Sherpa.
02:19A Sherpa.
02:19Yes.
02:20I said charmin' on the last podcast I was getting killed for.
02:25Do you think that doing something like that could be, like, the pinnacle of, like, our experience together?
02:31Do you think that we could do this?
02:33I think if you set your mind to it, you could climb Everest for sure.
02:38I don't know how much I really want to climb Everest.
02:42This is episode one and you don't even want to climb Everest?
02:45Come on.
02:46Drop me off.
02:46I'm done.
02:47I'll get out here.
02:48This guy's giving up on the championship.
02:49Before the season.
02:51I think the end goal of the show should definitely be at least climbing Mount Kilimanjaro.
02:57And how much less is that?
02:59That you only need a week to do.
03:02And it's a lot cheaper.
03:04I don't mind going to the gym.
03:06But if I could pick one or the other, I would rather go on, like, a nice two-hour hike.
03:10I go do this one called Gateway Loop all the time.
03:14I told the story on the pod.
03:15I took a hose beforehand and then I was walking out and the guy's like, aren't you going to wash your hands?
03:22And I almost fucking knocked the guy out for getting into my business.
03:26I'm like, I'm going to go snot and spit all over myself on this hour and a half hike and you're worried about me washing my, what am I going to be dabbing you up on the hike, you donkey?
03:35What do you care?
03:37Quaker steak and lube.
03:39I thought it was going to say, like, Quaker steak and fries.
03:42What does that mean?
03:43You can get your oil change but also grab the best wings in the USA?
03:47And get a steak, which is not nearly the best in the USA.
03:51Just the wings.
03:52I don't, like, I don't think you can get a lube job.
03:55What exactly?
03:56Maybe a rim job?
03:58Muck some barn?
03:59Muck some barn.
04:00By the way, we were talking about barns and we just learned that muck and barn means going down on a chick.
04:06In hockey lingo, I didn't know that.
04:13Where should we go eat?
04:14What's the best meal in town?
04:15Best Italian, if you like Italian, it's good.
04:18Is it homemade?
04:19Well, I mean, it's made in the restaurant.
04:22Paul.
04:23Paul, this and that.
04:26Seriously?
04:27Yeah.
04:27You're best.
04:27Yeah, what's up?
04:28How do you do it?
04:29Hey, man.
04:29Good to meet you.
04:30Good to meet you, man.
04:30Good to meet you, man.
04:30Good to meet you, man.
04:30Good to meet you.
04:31Good to meet you.
04:32I'm like, good to meet you.
04:34This guy's an old hockey player.
04:36He's a hot player.
04:36No, he's got to get me a picture.
04:39You guys got to tell us the best place to meet you.
04:41You want me to take it?
04:42You like to take it?
04:43What do you want me to take it?
04:43He's...
04:44What do y'all do?
04:45Just scary.
04:46We work for a media company.
04:48Not the media.
04:49Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:50The mainstream media?
04:51Oh, yeah, that's where I'm from.
04:52We don't work for the mainstream media.
04:54Okay, good, because we don't like it.
04:55Yeah.
04:55Because they laugh.
04:56That's fair, for sure.
04:57No.
04:58Our boss is...
04:59He's a big anti-mainstream media guy.
05:03She goes, what do you guys do for work?
05:05And I go, we work in the media.
05:06And she goes, what type of media?
05:09And I go, not the mainstream media.
05:12And she goes, good, because we don't like the media.
05:14Oh, yeah, yeah.
05:14People get a little stumped when you ask about food here.
05:18I know, it's crazy.
05:19Oh, Best Italian closes at 9.
05:21Discount tickets.
05:22Yeah, I don't know.
05:23I'm lost, dude.
05:24Every time we ask for advice, we end up way more confused.
05:28How's it going?
05:29Wow.
05:30It's going amazing.
05:3120 ounce.
05:32You went really off the board.
05:34The roast duck.
05:35But the thing is, I'm like, there's got to be a lot of ducks around here.
05:41Everybody just find your rhythm.
05:42Rhythm.
05:43So this actually might be the longest hike I've ever done.
05:46I'm confident that we can pull this off.
05:48Oh, no doubt.
05:49Very tranquil.
05:51Who's the most famous Canadian, would you say?
05:53Drake or Bieber?
05:54I would say the most, like, respected, notable Canadian ever.
06:00Definitely Trudeau.
06:01No, I'd probably say Terry Fox.
06:05Barry Fox?
06:06No, Terry Fox.
06:08He had cancer.
06:10He ran across Canada in order to raise awareness and money for it.
06:14Oh, nice.
06:15Yeah.
06:15So he's probably one of the most well-respected.
06:19Yeah.
06:21Shout out Terry Fox.
06:22I would probably say that Ryan Reynolds is up there now as most famous.
06:28I mean, Drake, Jim Carrey, Pamela Anderson's Canadian.
06:32Seth Rogen.
06:33Seth Rogen's Canadian.
06:35I think he's a BC guy.
06:36Nathan Fielder.
06:38I don't know who that...
06:39Oh, Nathan Fielder, the...
06:40The comedian.
06:42Nathan for you?
06:43Yeah.
06:43Oh, no shit.
06:44I didn't know he was Canadian.
06:45So this is just...
06:46This was, like, naturally, what do you think, water passed through it to carve out this cave?
06:51I'm not a geologist, but, yeah, I think your assumptions are correct.
06:55Now, have you done a lot of spelunking in your days?
06:58I did that national park by Kanab, Utah.
07:03And that's got a lot of caves?
07:04They had a lot of, like, earth carved out.
07:07Not necessarily caves.
07:09There might have been a few caves, but this is surely something else.
07:14Would you ever go on, like, an extreme spelunking mission where you spend, like, two days underground?
07:19No.
07:19I don't like the idea of that.
07:21Okay.
07:21And then that recent story of the person going cave diving and then getting stuck.
07:26I'm talking about the guy who just...
07:28He was, like, going in and crawling, and he got, like, stuck.
07:32Yes.
07:33And they tried.
07:33They couldn't even bring him out.
07:35They found him, but they couldn't get the body out.
07:39You can see where some of the fires were.
07:40Yep.
07:41Yeah, you're right.
07:41That's a fire.
07:43Well, I think that's where some of it hit.
07:45I wonder where Smokey the Bear was invented.
07:47So we were talking about it with locals yesterday.
07:50Glattenburg had a brutal fire how long ago?
07:53He said, like, eight or nine years ago?
07:55Yeah.
07:55Eight years ago.
07:56She said that the fire was started by a couple kids that were playing with cigarettes.
08:00Which means smoking, I would assume.
08:04Yeah.
08:04No, I don't think people play with cigarettes.
08:06I don't know, like, how many games I can think of with cigarettes.
08:09I can think of crank a cigarette.
08:14Cig toss when you try to throw it into your friend's mouth.
08:16That's probably what they were doing.
08:18They were probably trying to throw it into, like, each other's mouths.
08:20Yeah.
08:21Lit.
08:22I've seen people do that.
08:23That's stupid.
08:24I had a friend catch a cigarette from across the room in China.
08:27Most impress- I think I can probably find a video of it.
08:30I think he has a real job now, so he probably doesn't want it on camera.
08:32But we can just blur his face.
08:34Let's keep walking.
08:35Let's go.
08:38Now, this stuff is good, clean energy.
08:40Oh, wow.
08:41So, you just gotta- you gotta dig through to find the good stuff.
08:45I'm gonna booger hanging out of your nose.
08:47Oh, yeah.
08:47Been there for a while.
08:48Oh, nice.
08:49Fuck.
08:50Oh, viewers at home.
08:52We'll be selling that on our peaking squirrel.
08:55Oh, I think he wants some.
08:57Yeah.
08:58Hey, hey.
08:59Here.
08:59Really?
09:00Want to muck some mix?
09:02I think he's- he wasn't really that afraid of us.
09:04Here, I'm gonna get him.
09:07Didn't they have to euthanize that squirrel in New York that the guy was feeding?
09:10Yeah.
09:11Is that what happened?
09:12Yeah.
09:13Dude, the Scooby Stacks gave me a crazy burst of energy.
09:16Yeah, they did.
09:17We did get briefed on the difference between pepper spray and bear spray, where there's more
09:22pepper and pepper spray, and that upsets the bear, which will make them attack you, where
09:28you're trying to annoy the bear, and that's- there's a little less pepper in the bear spray,
09:33so they get more annoyed, and that's why they leave.
09:35That was the explanation.
09:36That's why, like, if you see a bear, you want to make a sound like this, because it'll be
09:40really annoying, and be like, hey, bear, you're a fucking pussy-ass bitch.
09:48Yeah, I heard a lot of shit about you.
09:49And you're a fucking-
09:50That's why you're here by yourself.
09:52You're a fucking loser.
09:53Yeah, you're a loner.
09:55That's why you got no friends with you.
09:56Dude, Biz, isn't it insane that bears can hibernate, and their heart rate, I guess, slows
10:01down so much that they don't fucking eat.
10:03I don't even know if they pee or shit.
10:05They just wet the bed?
10:06Yeah, maybe they're pissing themselves the whole time, but would you hibernate if you
10:11could?
10:11I go periods of time where I'll be full of energy, and then I'll crash for, for like
10:16a week where I'm sleeping 12 hours a night, and just, I think that's more of like my mind
10:21racing, and then finally just getting mental fatigue where you got to shut it down.
10:25Like, day of a broadcast, usually once a week, like I get to, I get to Atlanta on Tuesday
10:32night, and I get to bed probably around like 11, 12, and sometimes I don't even wake up
10:36till 2 in the afternoon, because we have to start our broadcast where we head over around
10:405, 5.30, and then we got to be on mentally till around 1.30 in the morning, so it's kind
10:46of a weird setup, but as far as the hibernation, I mean, I wonder, I wonder how long, I'm sure
10:54some people who fast end up just lying down and, and chilling for weeks on end, where if
10:59you're fasting, you can't fast.
11:01I was going to say people who are like 1,000 pounds, like 1,000 pound sisters, you can
11:06only post up on the couch and don't move for like five days.
11:10Yeah.
11:11What would you say the, the nicest hike you've ever done, like which state was it in?
11:15It was in Kunming, China.
11:18Oh, that's not a state.
11:19Yeah, well, it's a state of China.
11:22Oh, it is?
11:22Or it's a province.
11:23They have provinces like Canada there?
11:25Yeah.
11:26China's a lot like Canada.
11:28You guys are both run by a communist.
11:29You've been so many places, man.
11:34We'll get you abroad.
11:36Sure.
11:36You know what I mean?
11:38You were born abroad.
11:38And I'll make you a promise.
11:40This will probably be the shortest hike we do.
11:43Yep.
11:44Corey's like, ah.
11:45We're not making any promises.
11:47We ain't fucking around, man.
11:48We ain't going to start a hiking podcast and a, and a vlog series and do a, a, a one kilometer
11:55hike like a bunch of pigeons.
11:57We're not going to climb the fucking blue hills like Whitney.
12:00Yeah.
12:00Maybe we should, maybe we'll actually do one with him.
12:04Climb the blue hills.
12:04Special guest.
12:05I would, I would scale the blue hills, dude.
12:07I haven't been there since a kid.
12:09The mighty, mighty blue hills.
12:11We have to do it with skates on though.
12:12I guess in like South Korea, hiking's one of their favorite pastimes.
12:24In South Korea?
12:25In South Korea.
12:26And what they'll do is they'll get some like bottles of soju, which is their kind of hard
12:30alcohol.
12:31Okay.
12:31And they'll just hike in booze.
12:33Oh yeah?
12:33Yeah.
12:34Sounds fucking awesome.
12:35Yeah.
12:35It's kind of like a Finnish saunas.
12:39Oh yeah.
12:39They'll just booze.
12:41That's kind of, that's kind of their path.
12:42Like they're just known for their saunas.
12:44Yeah.
12:45It's actually, I want to say Finland is known as the happiest nation in the world on record.
12:51Yeah.
12:51But it also has one of the highest suicide rates.
12:53So explain that to me.
12:55So if you're not happy, you're not happy.
12:56Yeah.
12:57It's because all of the unhappy people kill themselves.
12:59Okay.
13:01So then like on average, it's a happy country.
13:06The cool thing about this hike too, is, is as you go, like you'll hit pockets where it's
13:10warm and you have the sun and then you'll hit pockets where like right now it feels a lot
13:14cooler than it just did like two minutes ago.
13:16Yeah.
13:17It feels like here you get so much good clean oxygen and all of a sudden it's taken away
13:22and it smells like bear shit.
13:24It's 11 miles, but this last few miles, the elevation gets pretty hardcore.
13:30I'm so grateful to be here with Corey too.
13:32Corey, he's had the pack on the whole time.
13:35He hasn't complained once.
13:36And he said, Biz, I ain't handing this off because I want the bragging rights to say that
13:41he had the pack the whole time.
13:42So he's our hardcore fearless leader.
13:44He's our Swiss army knife of the trip.
13:46You're going to keep seeing sights as you're going up and you're going to be like amazed.
13:49And then once you finally get up there.
13:50Oh, okay.
13:52You guys are hyping us up.
13:53I love it.
13:58We got to get there quick so we don't miss the llamas.
14:03Just in case Jelly Belly wants to come on board, I got to fucking house these fucking sport beans.
14:09Jelly Belly, we would love to have you.
14:14These beans are incredible.
14:15Yeah, get in here.
14:16Look at that.
14:18Keeking.
14:19Oh, wait.
14:20I got a mouthful of beans.
14:22It's a fucking photo.
14:24Wait, wait.
14:26I have a couple beans, dude.
14:28I feel incredible after eating them.
14:30Those beans have given me a new outlook on life.
14:33Sport beans.
14:35Who needs Gatorade when you got fucking beans?
14:37What is it?
14:38Beat?
14:38What flavor?
14:38Beat?
14:39Beat?
14:40No, it's grape.
14:41Oh, group.
14:42Berry.
14:43Berry.
14:43I'll take some beans.
14:44Oh, shit.
14:45Well, what the fuck, dude?
14:46You just sort of had a commercial selling me on these things.
14:49Yeah, well, I didn't expect Biz Nasty to fucking Bogart the Bear.
14:52The perfect pilot peak for our show, peak and working title.
14:59It was a beautiful hike.
15:01Hey, and our friend just showed up.
15:02Oh, yeah.
15:03I wanted to get you guys cookies, but I didn't have enough cash.
15:07Do you want to be in our vlog?
15:08You're right.
15:09Sit in the middle.
15:09I think this thing's going to be nice.
15:11I think we can fit at least another 150 pound.
15:14This thing's about to snap.
15:15We've got to get back to the recap.
15:17Oh, sorry.
15:18Are you, like, doing something important?
15:20He was trying.
15:21He was trying.
15:21He was trying.
15:22Oh, is that a vague?
15:23I told myself I was going to do zero nicotine until I was up top.
15:26Now, oh, is this?
15:27That's sativa.
15:28Oh, okay.
15:29Yeah.
15:29And that's nicotine.
15:31Use your hiking voice.
15:31Yeah, use your hiking voice.
15:33Use my hiking voice.
15:34Yeah.
15:34I forgot.
15:34I'm so pumped.
15:35You're screaming.
15:37Yeah, he's not screaming.
15:38You're hearing differently.
15:39Well, I just, those people are down there trying to kind of relax and smoke a J.
15:42I know.
15:43That's a Canadian.
15:44But you're in America.
15:45Oh.
15:45Nobody, nobody cares.
15:47Okay.
15:47She's Canadian.
15:48Some of his Canadian-ness is wearing off on me.
15:51There was a lady walking in front of me, and she tripped a little bit, and I go, I'm sorry.
15:55Do you know I'm sorry?
15:57I apologize to her.
15:58Yeah.
15:58For the, yeah, for the little trip.
16:00Maybe you were encroaching, and she got uncomfortable.
16:03I was 10 feet away, but it's just.
16:06Instinctual.
16:06Which sucks, because, you know, women really need to stop apologizing so much.
16:12Yeah.
16:13Like her.
16:13I've been saying that.
16:14I've been saying that for a while.
16:16I'm going to, I'm going to back out of this conversation.
16:19Whoa.
16:20I know you don't want to be on camera, but I've got to say, that's the most incredible squat
16:24form.
16:24He needs help.
16:25I've seen.
16:25He needs to learn.
16:26Yeah, I can't squat.
16:27No.
16:28And like, I used to live in China, where everyone was.
16:31Oh, wait, wait, what?
16:32Oh, your vagina staring me right in the face.
16:33Okay, this is just about.
16:35I can't do that either.
16:38I'm like so inflexible.
16:40The Asian squat is like.
16:41Can you be over there?
16:42Because they.
16:43Oh, yeah.
16:43No, I actually.
16:44They can have lunch.
16:45You're yelling at that.
16:46They can wait for the bus.
16:47They can just.
16:48They can do anything.
16:49See, I can squat like this if I have a lower back support, but I need, I need the back
16:54support.
16:54I call this squeeting.
16:55It's squat cheating.
16:57Squeeting.
16:58Squeeting.
16:58Do yoga.
17:00I know.
17:01You're right.
17:01I should actually do yoga.
17:03Would you ever do yoga?
17:04I was doing it all summer.
17:05It's the best.
17:06Yoga's the best.
17:07It's the best.
17:07What's your vlog about?
17:09Oh, well, this is the pilot episode and it's going to be about hiking actually, but we're
17:15going to do a different hike each episode all over, all over the country at first, but
17:20then eventually maybe all over the world.
17:22Oh my God.
17:22That's amazing.
17:23Yeah.
17:24We still haven't gotten that minute, uh, outro yet.
17:27We still have to do the outro, but I think, I think this, I think this is the podcast.
17:31No, no, no.
17:32This is perfect.
17:33Are you sure?
17:33This is how it's supposed to happen.
17:35Okay.
17:35I wanted to tell you guys, do you know that this is the most, uh, biologically diverse national
17:41park?
17:42Oh, we're in a national park.
17:51That's why we brought her on board.
17:53That's why we brought her on board.
17:54Our new co-host?
17:55What were you saying?
17:56You feel like it's a flight to be able to?
17:57It's the most geek, like, biodiverse park of the national parks, which is kind of surprising
18:04because you'd think the Pacific Northwest would have more, but I guess it's because, you
18:08know, it like, it straddles, like, multiple states.
18:12And it just has, like, all different, the most different types of trees.
18:16Like plants and probably bugs and stuff.
18:20I don't know.
18:20Bugs, wildlife.
18:21But yeah.
18:21Well, it's nice that one of us did their research.
18:24We did our research last night.
18:25You're supposed to annoy the bears but not piss them off.
18:29Well, I walked up to that herd of elk.
18:32It's the exact same thing.
18:34There's not a lot of black bear attacks up here, though, right?
18:36No.
18:36There's been 339 in the last 10 years.
18:39I read it last night.
18:41Oh, wow.
18:41That's not that much.
18:42That's not a small one.
18:42You're really good at retaining knowledge.
18:44Yeah, we saw one last night when we rolled into town.
18:47Then we saw a cop throw rocks at it to stay in the way.
18:49No, you're allowed to.
18:50That's what you're supposed to do.
18:51It's on the National Park website.
18:53Oh, throw rocks?
18:54They say that you are...
18:56Do you want to go throw rocks at bears tonight?
18:57No.
18:58They say...
18:58I mean, you don't go out of your way, but if they're advancing at you, you don't be quiet.
19:04You make yourself big.
19:05You can throw rocks.
19:07You can yell.
19:08How many fatalities in the last 10 years when it comes to black bears?
19:12So, it didn't say, and I thought it was interesting.
19:16It said major attacks, like where someone got hurt or killed.
19:24They didn't specify.
19:25You know where it does record fatalities from hiking is Angels Landing in Zion.
19:31Oh, I've been there.
19:32Did you hike the Angels Landing one?
19:33I did.
19:33I went right to the top.
19:34That's where I went.
19:35That would be beautiful.
19:36Yeah, when I did.
19:36It was.
19:37Can I have the last of my soup?
19:38No, I'm good.
19:39I don't think we need to crack open this can of rocket fuel at the moment, but I'm confident
19:45we can figure it out.
19:46And if we can't, we have a new co-host who can help us.
19:49Well, yeah.
19:50The co-host has not agreed to be on camera yet, so we've got to...
19:54We've got to talk to her about that.
19:56She'll be like the Wizard of Oz.
19:58It's okay.
19:58Nobody else listens to me.
20:00Like, why start up here?
20:01Okay.
20:03Oh, have you got anything to vent about?
20:05Nah.
20:06I'm happy.
20:07All right.
20:08Well, I think that's a wrap.
20:10Great hike.
20:11Cheers.
20:11Cheers.
20:12Cheers.
20:15Oh, the sun's going to peak back out, too.
20:18There we go.
20:18Speaking of peaking, my cock might start to peak out of its shell at some point.
20:23It's fucking cold right now.
20:25I got a fucking micro tiger at the moment, I'll tell you that much.
20:28I got a micro tiger shell down there.
20:31Hey, sometimes life brings you fork in the road.
20:34To Bullhead Trail.
20:35Yeah, we want to go that way.
20:36No, we came from this way.
20:37No, we didn't.
20:38No, because I said the exact same thing.
20:40We rolled down this way.
20:41Dude, we followed.
20:43Yeah, no.
20:44Also, if you read the sign, it says that we're supposed to go this way.
20:47Yeah, okay, good.
20:47I know for a fact you came from this way.
20:49Yeah, that would be so good if we just blindly followed Biz down the wrong trail.
20:54We would be in a completely different parking lot.
21:00We went from having a sick view to nothing.
21:03What does that teach you, Biz?
21:05It's wild.
21:06The moment can pass.
21:07A moment can pass.
21:08Yes, there you go.
21:10Like that.
21:10Tound it.
21:12Put it on a t-shirt.
21:13A moment can pass.
21:14Put it on a postcard.
21:21Yeah, we speak that Peking leaf, dog.
21:25Yeah, Peking ravioli.
21:27We, we, we, we, we, we peeking.
21:29You bitches in the valley, we peeking.
21:32We peeking.
21:33Even the branches peeking.
21:35We squeaking.
21:36Hey, hell of a first hike, brother.
21:40Harry Knuckles, baby.
21:41Listen, I'm sorry for fucking us on the cold tub.
21:43That is one of my biggest regrets of my life to this day.
21:46But, an unreal experience.
21:48Thanks to our boy fucking Cory back here, manning the fucking cameras.
21:52Yep, we crushed it.
21:52And we went to the highest point in this national forest.
21:56The entire Smokies.
21:57So, all the Smokies went to the highest point.
22:00Maybe one time we'll come back and we'll stay in a cabin.
22:03Maybe that's way down the road.
22:05But for now, it's on to our next adventure.
22:07Because we peeking, we peeking, your girl leaking, while he's squeaking.
22:12And she's squirking, and we working.
22:15Okay.
22:19What's the National Park called?
22:22Smoky Mountains.
22:23Oh, oh, oh.
22:24And now we're back in paradise.
22:27Gatlinburg.
22:28Look at that.
22:28We got a space needle.
22:30We got a chairlift.
22:31People are walking across a bridge.
22:33We got six laser tags over there.
22:35This is paradise, boys.
22:36I kind of feel like I'm in Vegas right now.
22:38Yeah.
22:42What a weekend, eh, micro-tigre?
22:44Cheers.
22:45All right, Biz, it's time for a little segment I like to call Peaks and Valleys.
22:48Okay, buddy.
22:49What was your peak of the day?
22:51What was your valley of the day?
22:52One peak meeting Claire.
22:54She was lovely.
22:55Canadian, fellow Canadian.
22:56Always like seeing my fellow countrymen on a hike.
22:59But, uh, Hiker Holly.
23:01Hiking with Holly is my Facebook group.
23:03I'm a solo hiker, and I never hike with anyone.
23:05I do this by myself.
23:06You're a machine, girl.
23:08Hiking with Holly.
23:09There you go.
23:10Because of Holly, we found out about the llamas.
23:13And she was excited about the llamas, which travel up the mountain every Monday, Wednesday,
23:18and Friday.
23:19And because we did the hike on a Friday, we got to see the llamas.
23:22Yep.
23:23So that was kind of cool.
23:24I never, I don't even know if I've ever seen a llama in person.
23:27Yeah, I think my main peak was at the peak when we were posted on that bench that was about to give out.
23:31Where we couldn't even see anything because of the smoke.
23:34Yeah, but it just, you know, I felt accomplished.
23:36It was the little bench that could.
23:38If you are.
23:39Oh!
23:41No way.
23:42It didn't give way.
23:45And, yeah, honestly, just sitting there chatting with Claire and you and fucking taking a can of Campbell's to the dome.
23:54I was in my element there.
23:58I was peeking.
23:59I think when I walked to the bathroom, I even, I even teared up a little bit.
24:03You got emotional.
24:04Those were the Scooby snacks.
24:05I was just, I was very happy.
24:07Yeah, that we'd accomplished our day.
24:09Yeah, we had accomplished our day.
24:11We made some great friends and we got to see the llamas.
24:13The valley of my day was, it was, it was definitely, um, probably the half hour after we took our cold plunge and just saw that there was probably six to ten other, like, more ideas.
24:28Six?
24:29Six hundred?
24:30Yes.
24:31There were six hundred better places to take a cold plunge.
24:33I picked the worst cold plunge on the entire mountain.
24:36You fucked us so hard.
24:37I know, Donnie.
24:39I know I fucked us, all right?
24:41If it was up to me, this is where we'd be going hippo mode.
24:43I didn't know this existed.
24:44I didn't remember seeing it on the way up.
24:46We had to go swim in a fucking Chitty Creek.
24:48Sorry, Wontan.
24:50God damn it, Beast.
24:51Another great hippo mode spot missed by Biz.
24:55But, hey, I think an even deeper valley was when I thought we weren't even going to do the cold plunge,
24:59because I thought you guys were already back in the car, and I had completely forgotten about it.
25:03The boys left me in the dust on the way back.
25:06We were supposed to stop at the cave so we could all go hippo mode, but nope.
25:10Fucking Biz is probably already back at the car by now.
25:13Oh, yeah.
25:13We share a brain.
25:14I got you, brother.
25:14Yeah.
25:15I knew you wanted that.
25:16So that was another peak when I finally found you and you were getting ready to do a cold plunge.
25:21Oh, let's fucking go, dude.
25:23Holy shit.
25:24You got a seaside trip?
25:25What?
25:26No.
25:27What are you talking about?
25:29I think your wife was pregnant.
25:33Wim Hof.
25:34You were onto something, Wim.
25:35You were onto something, Wimmy boy.
25:38What do you mean?
25:39Whimsical.
25:40Whimsical, baby.
25:42Yeah, no, I could stay in here for days, man.
25:44No.
25:44Nope.
25:47I can't afford a cold plunge like you, dude.
25:49This is all I got.
25:50All I got is making sure you probably got fucking four cold plungees in three different states.
25:55Hey, we can get a 12-plunge plunge, dude.
25:57We could.
25:57Tommy John, we're doing this.
26:00Get away from the shrinky-dinky.
26:01Just make sure you get the top bar.
26:04Tommy John, we got a lot of good hiking content coming out.
26:08You're our go-to, baby.
26:09Let's go.
26:10Let's go.
26:11Best underwear in the game.
26:12Buddy, look at these gitch.
26:13Yeah, dude, I would hike anywhere in those Tommy Johns.
26:17Are you kidding me?
26:17I remembered what you said, but once again, picked the worst goddamn cold tub.
26:23I'm sorry you couldn't do a proper, what do you call them, hippo diets?
26:27Hippo mode.
26:28Sorry, buddy.
26:29Well, technically, you are doing a hippo mode sesh right now.
26:32Yeah, we're going hippo mode now.
26:34This is a nice hot tub.
26:35I know you didn't even want to get in at first because you thought it smelled funny.
26:39You know what was another peak of my day?
26:41Yeah.
26:41Was seeing how much camaraderie and the brotherly love that those three brothers had.
26:46Are you guys all brothers?
26:48Brothers.
26:48Yeah, you guys all separated for a few years?
26:51About a year and a half.
26:52We do this every year.
26:53This one specifically or you picked every once?
26:56Usually this one.
26:56Yeah.
26:57Who's the oldest?
26:59Oldest, middle, or whatever.
27:00Oh, shit.
27:01Yeah, yeah.
27:04Well, have a great hike, buddy.
27:05Yeah, I appreciate you guys, man.
27:06We met them when we first got there.
27:08They parked the car right beside us.
27:09Yes.
27:10And then they crushed that hike.
27:12They were up there in no time.
27:13They were heading back down as we were still making our way up.
27:16So that was cool to see.
27:18No, for sure.
27:18I'm like, honestly, the entire day was one big peak.
27:21You've got to sprinkle in some valleys there.
27:24That's what makes them out.
27:25But yeah, the peak's like, you can't climb to a peak if you haven't been to a valley.
27:29Exactly.
27:31Valley for me, like probably the biggest valley of the day was the moody mushroom.
27:37Mellow mushroom?
27:38It's good, Biz.
27:39Are you like, would you actually eat pizza?
27:41Are you too worried about ketosis?
27:43Buddy, if you're...
27:44No, Biz.
27:45You've got to be in ketosis, dude.
27:47I can't be fat on TNT.
27:49Where's it going?
27:50He said...
27:50So when this thing's a 6 out of 10, when this thing's a 6 out of 10...
27:53There it is.
27:54I'm going to give them the fucking business, okay?
27:55Well, it depends what type of pizza you like.
27:57I will suck the dick off your torso if this is a 9 out of 10 pizza.
28:01Well, the thing is...
28:01I won't believe it until it touches my lips.
28:04This fucking place that this asshole said had the best pizza in the world.
28:09If Portnoy heard that, he'd fire you.
28:12Yeah.
28:12You should be fired from bar food.
28:13It's got a special place in my heart.
28:15Because like, I used to...
28:16I lived down south.
28:17It's clogging it up.
28:17That's why.
28:18I lived down south.
28:20I went to the one in Aiken, South Carolina.
28:22Oh, yeah.
28:22They're all the same.
28:23Where my wife's from.
28:24I went to the one in Augusta.
28:25And it was like...
28:26Dog food.
28:27It was like...
28:29The holy shiitake pie is good.
28:31I stand by that.
28:32Yeah.
28:33Good for your beagle.
28:34That's barking too much because he wants to eat human food.
28:38But you trick him.
28:39Dude, they were...
28:39And feed him the moody mushroom pizza.
28:41The mellow mushroom.
28:43They were going to be a potential sponsor.
28:44Oh, yeah.
28:45It was fucked out.
28:45Not on my watch.
28:46Not on my watch.
28:49This is a conversation I had with Megan making money.
28:52I go, going down to Gatlinburg.
28:53I know you spent a lot of time there.
28:55Where should we eat?
28:56And she said, you know what?
28:57The food on the strip is nothing to write home about.
29:00Megan.
29:01But they have a mellow mushroom.
29:03Megan.
29:04You're done.
29:05You're done.
29:06You're never going on a hike.
29:08You're done.
29:10I'm telling Portnoy.
29:12Another valley.
29:13What do you got for us?
29:14I don't think I have a lot more valleys.
29:16I think maybe the valley is when we first started.
29:19And I was worried about getting that parking pass and shit.
29:22And we were waiting to get our eggs.
29:24Oh, shit.
29:24But then you turned that into a peak real quick.
29:27That burp you just let out.
29:29That was smellier than any bear shit.
29:31I smelt on that hike the entire day.
29:33I'd rather a bear shit my mouth than smell another burp come out of your mouth.
29:36Okay.
29:38Did you smell that?
29:40Not yet.
29:40Oh, I hope you don't drop that.
29:42That was definitely, that was a peak of the trip being able to see a bear.
29:45That was cool.
29:46That was cool.
29:47But I agree with you that from the entire trip perspective, big time peak, can we go back
29:53to even yesterday for peaks?
29:55Sure, why not?
29:57Micro wrestling?
29:58Like, yeah.
29:58That was nuts.
30:00That was nuts.
30:00That's where we got our alter egos for our hiking trips, where you're going to be micro
30:05Tigre.
30:06Micro tiger?
30:07Well, we're going to say Tigre.
30:08Tigre.
30:09It's a French way.
30:09Tigre.
30:11Well, it would be a Spanish way, I would hope.
30:14Can you give us a...
30:15Yeah.
30:15And then I'm, uh...
30:18Grande chula?
30:20Who?
30:20Oh, grande?
30:21Yeah, because the other micro wrestler, she was little chula.
30:25Okay, so I'm going to be grande chula?
30:27No.
30:28Cholito.
30:29Cholito.
30:30Grande cholito?
30:30Grande cholito.
30:32I like that.
30:33Or grande cholo would be the male of what...
30:35Yeah, maybe just grande chola.
30:38Grande cholo.
30:39I got a ton of...
30:40I'm kind of like a cholito.
30:41Yeah.
30:42Grande cholo.
30:43That's like, that's a big little boy.
30:44Yeah, grande cholito.
30:48That's what I'm going to describe myself on the next Spin Chickles podcast when I talk
30:51about this.
30:52And, um, that's pretty much all I got.
30:55I don't know what...
30:56We did get, um, a little advice from Claire on to maybe where to head on the next one.
31:00Yes.
31:01Oh, yeah, we've got...
31:02Dude, I'm telling you, the world's a oyster.
31:04We've got too many heists to choose from.
31:07And when this comes out, we're going to have every hiker in our ear just telling us where
31:11to go.
31:12And I'm sure a lot of them will have great wrecks.
31:14Um, what was the name of that guy in Friends?
31:19Ross?
31:20No.
31:21Joey?
31:22No.
31:22Chandler?
31:23Chandler.
31:23The last one.
31:26Was he the last one?
31:27R.I.P.
31:28Oh, the one who passed?
31:29Oh, I don't know.
31:29I didn't know that.
31:30I didn't know which one was which.
31:31Chandler Bing.
31:32I don't watch Friends.
31:33Chandler fucking, uh, he passed out in a hot tub and honestly, I feel like I'm heading
31:38that way right now if we don't wrap this up soon.
31:40Well, on that, on that note.
31:41I'm going to fucking Chandler bang myself, dude.
31:43We'll see you on the next one, folks.
31:45Yeah, I'll see you later.
31:46Grande Cholito, signing off.
31:48We'll see you later.