How was motherhood an introduction to human psychology for Kalki? The actor spoke about sustainable living, being a mom, and disconnecting, over a game of TT in her easy, breezy Goa home.
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00:00Hi.
00:01Hi.
00:02Come in, come in.
00:03We have a table tennis right at the entrance.
00:14Are you a player?
00:15Here we go.
00:16Here we go.
00:17Okay, ready?
00:18I'm a little nervous.
00:19There we go.
00:20That's one zero.
00:21Oh my God.
00:22You're doing it without even looking.
00:23I hate you.
00:24What the hell?
00:25I would love to go inside, see more of the house, and then I'm going to come back and
00:35finish this business, yes.
00:39This is the living room.
00:41I feel like it's...
00:42I live in a church, you know, with all the stained glass windows and it's like, I mean,
00:47it's a basketball court.
00:49This is a size of a basketball court.
00:50For sure, for sure.
00:51So is this where you're spending most of your time at home?
00:54Yeah, on this sofa.
00:55Okay.
00:56I usually sit here, read games, you know, movies, whatever.
01:02What drew you to want to shift to Goa?
01:04Lifestyle, especially with a young kid.
01:07I feel like you need a little garden, you need space, you need outdoor activities, otherwise
01:11they get stuck to the screen.
01:12Got you.
01:13And I felt like I was at a ready point.
01:15It makes sense.
01:16Are you a chess player?
01:18I am.
01:19I am.
01:20Wow.
01:21Are you really good?
01:23I'm better than my TT did.
01:24Does your daughter play chess?
01:26Oh, she's learning.
01:27She started to understand what are the pieces and how they move.
01:32But you know, she's not quite got the concentration to play a game yet.
01:37I love this.
01:38This table always makes me think of a surgery table.
01:41You know, with the lights going down, I imagine one big body and we're just the cannibals
01:47and we're eating.
01:48Okay.
01:49That got real.
01:50Okay.
01:51I love this little window.
01:52It feels like a diner.
01:53This hatchet is very useful when we have lots of people.
01:56So this is our little kitchen.
01:59I mean, it's just amazing how much space you have in Goa.
02:02So tell us a little bit about your diet.
02:05What are you usually eating?
02:06What does it look like?
02:07Me and my partner make breakfast and then lunch is Indian.
02:12My cook, she makes very good, she's Bengali, so she makes great fish.
02:16And dinner is very like salad based and like light.
02:20That's so healthy.
02:21I love a burger.
02:22Yeah.
02:23Like I'll get a good burger from Burger Factory in Goa.
02:26Okay.
02:27But I don't like the ones, these like fast food ones.
02:30Fair enough.
02:31I just don't like them.
02:32It's not about being healthy.
02:33Like we have french fries, we have pasta.
02:35Okay.
02:36We eat all those, like my daughter's favorite food is pasta bolognese.
02:39Okay.
02:40So like once a week, at least she needs to have more pasta bolognese, right?
02:44You're very vocal about your eco-friendly lifestyle.
02:48Yes.
02:49That's what I noticed, right?
02:50All the shopping bags, there's no plastic over there.
02:53Even the very colorful soaps over there.
02:56All the household products, pretty much floor cleaners and laundry and, you know, toilet
03:02paper, all of that is like recycled or natural non-chemical products.
03:07What's the origin story?
03:09Why did you, you know?
03:10Why did I get into it?
03:11I think I've, it's just a reminder of what I was anyway doing, growing up with.
03:16Do you want a cup of coffee?
03:17No, I'm good with my water.
03:19I might get myself a cup of coffee instead of you.
03:20Oh, please help yourself.
03:21Yeah.
03:22So we are going to do a fun little rapid fire while you make your coffee.
03:29Okay.
03:30What is your go-to karaoke song?
03:31Probably a Joni Mitchell song, like Paved Paradise.
03:36Okay.
03:37Put up a parking lot.
03:39You know that one?
03:40Nope.
03:41Hey, paved paradise, put up a parking lot.
03:44There it is.
03:45There it is.
03:46If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
03:50I think being invisible would be a great superpower because you could go anywhere into anybody's
03:56place and find out lots of little secrets and run the world.
04:01Interesting.
04:02Yeah.
04:03So what would yours be?
04:04I would, ooh, no one's ever asked me.
04:05I'd like to fly.
04:06Oh, really?
04:07Just fly about.
04:08Fly would be nice.
04:09Yeah.
04:10Yeah.
04:11Just all the world problems, I'll just go somewhere.
04:12Look at that.
04:13You don't even want to like change the world or anything.
04:15Just like chill.
04:16Philosophically, I think saving the world is still like, you're trying to, you think
04:22that you have the power to do, it's arrogance, you know?
04:24Yeah.
04:25I get what you're saying.
04:26Whereas getting to the next level where you're just at peace.
04:28Yeah.
04:29It's pretty good.
04:30What can I say?
04:31Well done, Nihal.
04:38So Kalki, we do this segment on our show where we quiz our guests on Gen Z lingo.
04:44Oh, damn it.
04:45Here we go.
04:46So it's called OK Boomer.
04:48I give up.
04:49At least try.
04:51What does Riz mean?
04:53Charisma.
04:54What does ghosting mean?
04:58When you like stop calling somebody after dating them.
05:00Hmm.
05:01Yeah.
05:02Do you have any advice to like not get ghosted?
05:05Don't be an a**hole.
05:06But, okay.
05:07So you're saying that's always the case?
05:09You're saying only if you're an a**hole, you get ghosted?
05:12No, I'm saying the one ghosting is also an a**hole.
05:15What does addy mean?
05:16Addict?
05:17Address.
05:18Address.
05:19Send me the addy.
05:20Send me your addy.
05:21Yeah.
05:22Oh.
05:23Okay.
05:24I always send that song.
05:25Send me your location.
05:26Yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:27That's a good one.
05:28That's a good one.
05:29Shout out Khaled.
05:30This is the last one.
05:31It's a hard one.
05:32What is a clout chaser?
05:33A clout chaser?
05:35Is it like somebody who is a bully?
05:37So clout is essentially fame.
05:39So anybody who does things to just chase that, you're a clout chaser.
05:44If you would like to give some advice to the youth of the nation using some of the
05:50words you've learned here today, what would it be?
05:53Don't be a clout chaser, be a clout chaser.
05:58Wow.
05:59Find out where the clouds are going because that's the future.
06:03Hold up.
06:04Wise one.
06:05Nailed it.
06:06Nailed it.
06:07Everybody asks this, but what truly changed from once you became a mother?
06:14What sort of epiphanies or realizations did you have?
06:18Wow.
06:19Becoming a mother is many things.
06:23One is it's a huge lesson in psychology because you really see in minute detail how to handle
06:32a human being, which then leads to you going right back to your childhood.
06:37So everything you've achieved goes away.
06:39And that's why we usually have postpartum depression and we're just like lost.
06:44But because of that, you also re-find yourself in a new perspective because you can't go
06:48back to who you were before.
06:49You're never going to have the freedoms, you're never going to have the times.
06:53Everything else, everything has rescheduled and re-changed.
06:57So who are you in that?
06:59And it's exciting.
07:00I don't know if you have kids, if you're going to have kids.
07:03You think I have kids called kids?
07:06No, but you never know.
07:08Teenage pregnancies are a thing.
07:10Sometimes people become fathers super young.
07:13Anyway, I mean, you struggle up and down.
07:17I think sometimes I feel like I'm still in postpartum four years down the line, you know.
07:21I think my mother is still in postpartum.
07:25But you know, that really first few months is extremely trying and you do need all the
07:32help you can get.
07:33Going forward, if you had advice to the parents watching, what would that be?
07:37See, I'm not like a really woke, woke parent who's like, you can let your kid do whatever
07:41they want and be like a monster because that's what's happening a lot now with parents.
07:46I'm kind of in between.
07:48I think discipline and boundary making is very important.
07:52But I would just say, never lose the sense of like play and curiosity because it's when
07:58you're playing, really playing with your child that you find out the most serious stuff about
08:03them.
08:04Like you'll be playing puppets together and suddenly they'll mention their vagina, you
08:09know.
08:10And what about like iPad time?
08:12Does she get a lot of or are you trying to like?
08:14Now, thank God, we hardly have to worry about iPad time because we're here and there's just
08:20so much external activity.
08:22There's a cycle.
08:23She goes for cycles.
08:24So TV time, she usually gets between like five and six in the evening.
08:29But nowadays, she doesn't even, sometimes she doesn't even ask for it.
08:32So it's great.
08:33Okay.
08:34What about your screen time?
08:37My screen time is after I put her to bed, yeah.
08:39Because that's the time we get like as a couple as well.
08:44So yeah, I have an indulgence, like an unhealthy indulgence for serial killer shows and stalker
08:50shows.
08:51I think because I end up watching so much of this like child stuff that I need to counter
08:56it.
08:57Got you, got you.
08:58Otherwise, it's like, yeah.
08:59And are you on reels?
09:00Are you like scrolling?
09:01Ah, yeah, that's a problem.
09:03So now what I've started doing is at night, I keep my phone away.
09:07I keep it in a different room.
09:10And I also don't have it next to my bed in the mornings.
09:12So until after breakfast, I don't check my phone.
09:16Okay, so back to our table tennis match that we started.
09:19I feel like it is time for us.
09:21Score is 3-2.
09:22That's not how I remember it.
09:23No, it's 3-2.
09:24I'll take your word for it.
09:25Yeah.
09:26Okay.
09:27All right, guys.
09:28For Brute.
09:29Choke.
09:30Damn it, damn it, damn it.
09:31I'm out of here, bro.
09:32Damn it.
09:33Damn it.
09:34Damn it.
09:35Damn it.
09:36Damn it.
09:37Damn it.
09:38I'm out of here, bro.
09:39Damn it.
09:40I'm built different.
09:41Please just let me walk out of there.
09:43Get out of here.
09:44On that point.