It's A Living S3 E3 Amy Big Girl Now
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00:00Life's not the French Riviera, believe me Life's not a charity bar
00:11It isn't all a great big bed of roses It's not like showbiz, but the main thing
00:20We're not supposed to be outnumbered, believe me We know we're doing our part
00:29Okay, we may be less than wealthy But not that we're young and healthy
00:38And anyone who's young and healthy knows that that's a waste
00:46The traffic flows, it's unbearable
01:16Everyone knows an ant can't move a rubber tree plant
01:25But he's got high hopes, he's got high hopes He's got high, high in the sky hopes
01:38Yes, high hopes
01:41Some of you regular-sized patrons may have looked around the restaurant tonight and noticed more than the usual number of big, beautiful people.
01:50No, we're not having an all-you-can-eat special. In fact, it's just the opposite.
01:56These brave, beefy brothers and sisters are all members of Pounds Off Now.
02:02And they're staying here at the hotel on an intensive weight-reduction program.
02:08So this is the old sun man saying,
02:11Even though you start to quake over chocolate cake, don't be greedy and grab
02:18Oops, there goes another inch of that Oops, there goes another inch of that
02:25Oops, there goes another inch of that
02:29Slam.
02:32Look, I know it's hard, but be strong and order from your special menu. How about some nice broiled whitefish?
02:38I hate whitefish.
02:40So do I. How about some broiled chicken?
02:42Will you leave the skin on?
02:44Wait a minute, now you're getting crazy on me.
02:47What would you like?
02:48The last rights, we're all starving to death.
02:51Look, folks, I know how difficult this is for you. What you're doing here is really admirable.
02:56You know, about a month ago, I had to lose three pounds.
03:02I know that may not sound like much, but I'm not big boned.
03:06You are showing such strength, such willpower, such self-control.
03:11Thank you.
03:12Now, what would you like?
03:13A bowl of whipped cream.
03:17They don't look any thinner than they did yesterday, but they sure are meaner.
03:20That guy over there almost bit my head off.
03:22If he had, he would have eaten it.
03:26Excuse me, miss, could I have a little extra Roquefort dressing?
03:29Sure.
03:33You almost got me.
03:34Bring me the damn dressing, or you don't get no tip.
03:37I don't care about the tip, but can't we be civil?
03:40Not without the dressing.
03:42Okay, if that's the way you want it.
03:44Excuse me, I'm going on my donut break.
03:50I'm not going to wash the cottage cheese.
03:53Well, you don't use soap or anything. All it means is...
03:55I know what it means. I'm a chef.
03:58I found it.
03:59Look, you washed the cottage cheese.
04:01I've skinned their chicken, I've steamed their vegetables,
04:03now you want me to wash the cottage cheese?
04:06You don't need a cook, you need a dry cleaner.
04:08Howard, don't tell me what I need.
04:10I know what I need.
04:11And I'm willing to wait till you need it, too.
04:15That's it.
04:16I try to be nice, I try to be sensitive.
04:18If you want to keep those Lardos from having salt, give me a gun.
04:22You know, frankly, I'm disappointed in all of you.
04:25Here we have a group of people who are trying to improve their health
04:28and get a new start in life.
04:29What they're doing is commendable,
04:31and all you can do is complain how hard it is.
04:33This should be a piece of cake.
04:35Don't say that out there.
04:38You're right, Nancy.
04:40You know, I've never seen you so caring about a group of people before.
04:43I've never served such small portions for such high prices before.
04:49Amy, your father's here.
04:52My father?
04:54You told me he was coming?
04:56Ain't this a kicker?
04:59Now, where do you suppose your father came here all the way from Texas?
05:02Probably heard we washed the cottage cheese.
05:07Daddy!
05:10Daddy!
05:11What are you doing here?
05:12Is Mama okay?
05:13Oh, sure.
05:14Mama's fine.
05:15Grandma's fine.
05:16Old Blue's over the mange, back up on the couch.
05:19Excuse me, would you pass those rules?
05:21Well, certainly.
05:22Don't do it, Daddy.
05:23Now, you behave yourself.
05:25Look, you're busy.
05:26No, no.
05:27We can talk later after you get off work.
05:28Oh, no, Daddy.
05:29I'll take my break right now.
05:30Well, fine.
05:31Oh, Daddy.
05:33Waitress, can I have some butter?
05:34No.
05:35What's the deal here?
05:36Is everything on the cart?
05:39Oh, I don't want her.
05:42You can have her.
05:43She's too fat for me.
05:45She's too fat for me.
05:47She's too fat for me.
05:48Oh, I don't want her.
05:50You can have her.
05:53You can have her.
06:00Been a lot of changes in Snyder
06:02since you've been gone, darling.
06:04They're serving hot sandwiches down at the Flying Egg.
06:06Really?
06:07French dip.
06:08Oh.
06:11Daddy, I really think you're gonna like it here.
06:13I'll show you all around,
06:14and we'll just have ourselves a good old time.
06:16I can't believe you came all the way out here from Texas.
06:19What's so important?
06:21Well, Amy,
06:22Reverend Hardy retired.
06:23Well, that might be a real good thing, Daddy,
06:25because he was getting a little shaky on the baptisms.
06:27He almost lost a few in the river.
06:29Honey, he wasn't that bad.
06:31Oh, yeah?
06:32Remember when he held me down,
06:33I had to come up spitting.
06:34Yeah, he did have a way of getting you
06:36a little nearer to God than you ever really wanted to be.
06:42Anyway, I got talking to the new preacher.
06:45Reverend Wilborn has a sister out here.
06:48He's been out to visit more than once,
06:50and he says this city is a hotbed of sin and corruption.
06:53Daddy, that's what Reverend Hardy used to say about Snyder.
06:56The thing is,
06:57I'm not sure I should ever let you come out here in the first place.
07:00Daddy, this town isn't as bad as all that.
07:03Just take a look around for yourself and make up your own mind.
07:06Well, I got no time, honey.
07:07I promised Reverend that I'd drive down
07:09and visit with his sister in Azusa,
07:11but I'm gonna be back here tomorrow night,
07:13so you be all packed and ready to go home.
07:21I'll be glad when these people leave in a few days.
07:24No cream, no butter, no red meat,
07:26no sugar, no eggs.
07:28There is no joy in this for me, Nancy.
07:30Howard, these people are money in the bank.
07:32You'll have to look for joy elsewhere.
07:34You're not gonna talk about your water bed again, are you?
07:39What big ears you have,
07:41you'll have to look for joy elsewhere.
07:43You're not gonna talk about your water bed again, are you?
07:47What big ears you have.
07:49The better to hear that Howard doesn't want to go to Grandma's house.
07:54Is something wrong with Amy?
07:56She's been in the bathroom ever since her father left.
07:58What? That was hours ago.
08:01Well, she better be dead or I'm docking her.
08:04Amy?
08:06You in there?
08:08Yes.
08:10Are you ever coming out?
08:13In a minute, I'm washing my face.
08:15Still?
08:17She must be down to the bone by now.
08:23You okay?
08:25No, you're not. You've been crying.
08:28No, I haven't.
08:30Oh, come on, kid. What's wrong?
08:33My daddy wants me to move back to Snyder.
08:35Is that why your father came here?
08:37To get you to move back?
08:39And you're gonna go?
08:41Wait a minute. You're an adult.
08:43You got a good job. You're happy.
08:45Now, I know those are the things that drive parents crazy, but you can't go.
08:49Why does he want you to move back home?
08:51He thinks L.A. is sinful.
08:53That's why I came here.
08:55Well, this is crazy, right?
08:58I mean, she doesn't want to go.
09:01Of course.
09:03Some like it hot. It was on the television the other night.
09:05We're gonna dress you up like a girl.
09:07No, no, better yet, we're gonna dress you up
09:09like a boy. Can you play a saxophone?
09:11Doesn't matter. You can fake it.
09:13Okay, a friend of mine has an all-man band.
09:15We're gonna sneak you in.
09:17You will go on bus tours, and he'll never find you.
09:20Okay, so it's a little rough around the edges.
09:23Amy, you're a grown woman.
09:26A term that describes most of us.
09:29And there comes a time when you have to stand up to your parents.
09:32He'll hate me.
09:34If you married Prince, he'd hate you.
09:36This'll get over.
09:38No one is saying it's gonna be easy,
09:40but you have to live your own life now.
09:42You're right.
09:44If I'm gonna live like an adult,
09:46I'm gonna have to act like an adult.
09:48Are you listening to this?
10:04Howard, I need a broiled whitefish plain.
10:06Oh, boy, my years at Cordon Bleu
10:08are about to be tested.
10:10Steamed carrots plain.
10:12Even rabbits don't like them that way.
10:14And a side of lemon wedges.
10:16Mmm!
10:18Sorry I'm late.
10:20Oh, that's okay. I'll think of an excuse for you.
10:22I'm not that late.
10:24It's Friday night.
10:26Wanna go to Chippendales after work?
10:29Just for the food.
10:31I can't. I'm sleeping at the Coliseum.
10:34Jan, if you don't want to go, just say so.
10:36I mean, even I could come up with a better excuse than that.
10:38No, I mean it.
10:40Springsteen tickets are going on sale tomorrow.
10:42Ellen and I are sleeping in line.
10:44Boy, it's rough being a parent,
10:46but I suppose if Ellen really wants to go that bad...
10:48They're for me. She hates Springsteen.
10:50I couldn't find a babysitter.
10:52Howard, give me a double Chateaubriand,
10:54well-marbled, sauce Bernays,
10:56cream spinach, baked potato with the works,
10:58and a Napoleon for dessert.
11:00You're not just doing this to make me feel better, are you?
11:02No, it's for the guy at table six.
11:04Let's go out there and kiss him on the mouth.
11:09Well, well, well
11:11Look who's here
11:13I haven't seen you in many a year
11:16If I knew you were coming
11:18I'd have baked a cake
11:20Ooh, baked a cake
11:22Ooh, baked a cake
11:24Hey, shut up!
11:27Well, did you enjoy your meal?
11:29Not really.
11:31How about a bowl of fresh fruit for dessert?
11:33No.
11:35Okay. Well, I'll get your check.
11:37If you want a tip,
11:39you'll find it in the fountain on the first floor.
11:41When you put it in, make a wish,
11:43because that's the only way you're gonna get more service.
11:50Can I get you some more celery?
11:52Jan? Yes.
11:54Cynthia.
11:56Cynthia Winslow.
11:58Cynthia!
12:00Wow!
12:02I mean, hi!
12:04I didn't recog... Cynthia!
12:06I've changed a lot since high school, huh?
12:08No. Well, yeah, a little.
12:11Jan, it's okay.
12:13Took me a long time to understand what happened, too.
12:15What did happen?
12:17Well, when we graduated high school,
12:19I got married and moved away from home.
12:21I missed everybody and was depressed, so I ate.
12:23I can understand that.
12:25Then I got divorced, which depressed me, so I ate.
12:27I know the feeling.
12:29Then I hated my job, which depressed me, so I ate.
12:32Uh, I'm beginning to see a pattern here.
12:35Then there was nothing to depress me,
12:37so I was depressed, so I ate.
12:39Cynthia, you ate too much.
12:41Depressing, isn't it?
12:43I'll get you some carrot sticks.
12:45Thanks for covering for me. Did you talk to your father?
12:47Not yet.
12:49Well, he just got back from Azusa.
12:51Oh, I know how you feel.
12:53When I was 17, I backed the car into the mailbox.
12:55I can still remember how difficult it was to tell my father.
12:58How'd you do it?
13:00I'm gonna.
13:04Ladies, the pound's off now.
13:06People are getting meaner by the minute.
13:08Now, either you go back to work immediately,
13:10or I'll tell them that your pockets are filled with M&Ms.
13:17Hi, Daddy.
13:19How was Azusa?
13:21Let's go, Amy. We're leaving.
13:23No. We're not.
13:25Yes, we are, honey. Now get in the car.
13:27Daddy.
13:29Daddy, I love you,
13:31and I want to make you happy.
13:35But I'm staying.
13:37If that's the way you want it.
13:41Bye, Amy.
13:43Daddy, why don't you stay, and we can spend some time together?
13:45You've made your decision, girl,
13:47and I don't want to be part of our family anymore.
13:51I just don't know how I'm gonna explain this to your mama.
14:03Daddy!
14:05Come back!
14:11You guys cover for me?
14:13I'm not gonna let him break her heart that way.
14:15I'll be right back.
14:17Where has everyone gone?
14:19Well, see, it's like this.
14:21Amy's father wants her to move back home,
14:23only she doesn't want to go,
14:25so we told her that she should...
14:27Stop. Go to the lounge, find Jan,
14:29bring her back. I'll get Cassie.
14:35Sonny, you're going to be alone for a minute.
14:37Try to imitate a human being.
14:41You know, folks, people always say to me,
14:43if you're a brilliant composer and lyricist,
14:45why don't you play more of your own songs?
14:55Hold it, Buster!
14:57Cassie, wait.
14:59What are you doing?
15:01You've left a room full of starving people up there.
15:03You booked them, not me.
15:05Listen, I...
15:07I don't have time.
15:09The man is in a hurry, Cassie.
15:11You just can't walk out on your daughter like that.
15:13She made her decision, and I'm in a hurry.
15:15Not anymore, you're not.
15:17Cassie, you've stopped the elevator.
15:19We were stuck.
15:21Trapped.
15:23Excuse me, young woman.
15:25No.
15:27Has anyone else noticed the lack of air in here?
15:29You're being unreasonable.
15:31Yeah, I guess it's catching.
15:33Cassie, I want you to start this elevator.
15:35No.
15:37What if I fire you?
15:39I have a phobia.
15:41You hear that, pal?
15:43We don't have too much time before she starts going berserk.
15:45Look, Amy is a wonderful person.
15:47Wonderful.
15:49She's unbelievable.
15:51Oh, she makes sense, doesn't she?
15:53Cassie is very wise.
15:55I'm too young to die.
15:57No, you're not.
15:59You don't think your daughter is a good girl?
16:01Boy, you've got some set of standards, pal.
16:03If she were any better, they'd have statues of her in front of churches.
16:05I have nothing more to say.
16:07We're not moving until you talk to Amy.
16:11All right, Casey, I want you to listen up.
16:13And I want you to listen up now.
16:15All right!
16:17All right!
16:19All right!
16:21All right!
16:23As long as we're together
16:25It doesn't matter at all
16:27It doesn't matter at all
16:29We'll get old and our quarrels end
16:31We'll get old and our quarrels end
16:33We'll be the same
16:35Since we've started
16:37Let's travel on board
16:39Singing a song
16:41Shine
16:43A bright
16:45Shine
16:49Yeah!
16:51Whoo!
16:53All right! Yes!
16:55You guys are beautiful!
16:57Who wants another roll?
16:59All right, all right, wait a second.
17:01Let's not forget Mr. Snifter.
17:03All right, freeze. Drop the rolls.
17:09What if your parents moved out here?
17:12No, that's crazy.
17:14What if we all moved to Texas?
17:17I'm grasping at straws, aren't I?
17:23Daddy.
17:25Cassie says I should talk to you.
17:27Talking's good. Talking's always good.
17:30Yeah, talking is very important.
17:32Talking is what separates man from the animals.
17:35Except parrots.
17:37Good point, Don.
17:39Look, let's go call your father and tell him about the mailbox.
17:42Oh, he's probably eating now.
17:54I, uh, forgot my order book.
18:01Just taking a break, right?
18:06You realize how difficult this is for him?
18:09And you realize how difficult this is for her?
18:12You both realize how difficult this is for me,
18:14but there's no talking going on here.
18:18Doesn't seem to be much to say.
18:20Well, just tell each other how you really feel.
18:24But... with speaking.
18:30Look, Amy, you know what's on your father's mind.
18:33He's worried about you being here all alone in Los Angeles.
18:36Well, I already told him not to worry.
18:38This town is nothing but a bunch of Sniders strung together.
18:41Telling someone who's worried not to worry
18:43doesn't mean they're gonna stop worrying.
18:45Oh, that's not it.
18:47He knows I didn't come to L.A. to get in trouble.
18:49There was plenty of opportunity for that back in Snider Town.
18:52Then, uh, what is his problem?
18:55You got me.
18:57The problem is, I miss you.
19:02I miss you, Amy.
19:06The other day, I came home with a sack of red licorice,
19:09and you're the only one in the house that ever liked that stuff.
19:14I just can't get used to the idea that you're not there anymore.
19:18You know, I've been thinking, too.
19:21I could call more than once a week
19:24and shoot.
19:26I could just hop on a plane every now and then and...
19:29Sorry, y'all.
19:31I'm sorry, honey.
19:33Okay.
19:35Well, I guess I can safely say
19:38that this is the worst week for tips
19:40since I was 15 years old
19:42and working the snack bar at the Little League.
19:44I know the pounds off people were hard to deal with,
19:47but let's face it, losing weight is murder.
19:49I know what I'm like when I'm on a diet.
19:51I get mean.
19:53My last diet, I saw this kid coming down the street
19:55eating a Fudgesicle, and I bumped into him
19:57just so that he'd drop it on the sidewalk.
19:59We both cried.
20:01Last time I tried to lose weight,
20:03I bought a box of those tasteless diet cookies.
20:05Those are awful.
20:07Now I have to eat them with ice cream.
20:09I was on one of my famous starvation diets,
20:11and Ellen forgot to take her lunch to school one day,
20:13so like a good mom, I got in the car,
20:15got about halfway there,
20:17pulled behind a billboard and ate the goo-goo pie.
20:19You know, I'm just the opposite.
20:21I eat and I eat and I eat
20:23and never gain an ounce.
20:25And her father wants her back.
20:27Hey, guys,
20:29look what I just found in my snifter.
20:31It's addressed to all of us.
20:33There's a note.
20:35Dear gang, thanks for the help and patience.
20:37Consider this the tips you never got.
20:39It's from the pounds off now people.
20:41Isn't that sweet?
20:43It's a check for $500.
20:45Wow!
20:47Hey, that's $125 a person
20:49if we don't count Sonny.
20:51Wait a minute.
20:53It's made out to the United Fund,
20:55donated in all our names.
20:57Oh, well, it's a good cause.
20:59Sure it is.
21:01Yeah, that was very thoughtful
21:03of the pounds off now people.
21:05Vicious suckers, aren't they?
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