Dana B | Dana Beers Vlog
Category
🥇
SportsTranscript
00:00 Just don't fucking take me out.
00:02 [laughter]
00:04 Why are you so mad?
00:05 Because I got a deal with fucking nine idiots.
00:07 Oh my god.
00:08 Dude, when I was off the court, they outscored, like, I needed on the paint.
00:13 Billy thinks he should never come out.
00:15 Everyone's going after all the shots I took, but they were literally all from boards, and I was getting fouled the whole time.
00:22 I went to the line four times and probably should have gone eight times.
00:26 We don't need you on the court for 40.
00:28 For defense.
00:29 Billy, four for 18. The stats don't lie.
00:31 I'll give Billy credit. He hustles. He gets a shitload of offensive boards, but I was three for six, and I had as many points as him.
00:37 You know, they wanted to take the leading scorer and make him the fall guy, whatever.
00:40 I never called him "Ballhog Billy." I'm just, there's people around the office calling him that.
00:44 When it comes to rebounds, help defense, boxing out, if you check out all of HUB's offensive rebounds, I'm boxing out and opening up the lane for him.
00:52 He takes a lot of shots, but that's okay. We tied. We didn't lose, we tied.
00:57 There's a lot of blocking and tackling that, you know, doesn't show up on the stat sheet, but, like, you need to have me out on the court.
01:05 Going hard on the boards inflates your shots taken. I don't care.
01:09 These guys are all going after me, the highest scoring team, because some of their stat lines were absolutely terrible.
01:14 There's a lot of guys that should not be fucking talking.
01:17 Billy was just, he took the wind out of our sails.
01:20 I can't believe this is the attitude of this team.
01:22 You've been hard in the fucking paint, dude.
01:24 I think he's really good at grabbing boards, but when he does that, he should pass it out.
01:28 It killed possessions.
01:29 That line comes out, and all of a sudden, like, there's bad guys.
01:32 I've never been on a team in my life where, like, guys are literally just, like, trying to embarrass other people.
01:38 Fucking bullshit.
01:41 The team's a chamelous. There's going to be a lot of blaming. The stats are not doing well.
01:45 There's a lot of turmoil in the, in the, in the, uh, loft of this play basketball.
01:51 Where's the court in this office?
01:53 Such a piece of shit.
01:55 I haven't even unleashed, like, full berserker Billy on these bitches.
01:59 What the tape doesn't show is that Billy does get a lot of his own rebounds, and a lot of the misses are on tip-ins.
02:04 So that's a bigger issue that he needs to finish his layups and not have multiple, you know, shots for one chance.
02:09 But thank you for being the only one who's being honest.
02:12 I got you.
02:13 He did shoot a ridiculous three that absolutely hit nothing but the backboard.
02:16 Well, imagine if I hit it?
02:17 It would have been sick.
02:18 It would have been sick.
02:22 In the moment it was like, the boys need something right now.
02:25 If I hit this, everyone's going to get hyped.
02:27 Are you going to join?
02:28 Fuck no.
02:29 They played one game and I saw, saw like the stat sheet, and it was literally Billy football took like 38 shots.
02:35 And like everyone else had like two attempts. I was like, I'm glad I didn't miss.
02:38 It was hustle ball.
02:39 It was all, it was all within four feet of the rim.
02:43 Top three cancers of the team.
02:45 Billy.
02:49 It's like stage four, but it's curable.
02:52 It can go in remission with the right treatment.
02:54 Gets a shit load of offensive boards, but he's just, he's a football player.
03:01 Like he'll get the offensive board.
03:02 It'll kind of clank it, but he's, he's like, you know, active down there.
03:05 We need that.
03:06 I honestly never should be on a documentary playing basketball because like you hate to see it, but you love to play with it.
03:13 I'm doing myself no services being out there.
03:16 Like for my brand, my image like this, I shouldn't be on camera doing this stuff.
03:20 Like what I do on like a pickup court, I purposely don't record any of it.
03:24 And like there's police anyway.
03:28 Clearly there's a problem here.
03:30 I think there's no, I didn't think there was a problem.
03:34 We walked off the fucking court and then the stat sheet came out and now everyone's like, that's it.
03:39 Like all these numbers, hard earned shots.
03:42 My teammates are giving me a lot of shit right now, but you know, strong man can bear the burden of a team that's embarrassed that they tied.
03:49 Is it true that Billy, let's say is a volume shooter?
03:53 Yeah. Yeah.
03:54 Billy, we got to work on that.
03:56 Billy doesn't think before he shoots, doesn't think before he does a lot of things, but he's working on it.
03:59 Billy's important to this team.
04:00 He is like very, very athletic.
04:03 He is out of control.
04:04 He's going to be great off the boards and great putting them back.
04:08 Sometimes he just forces it too much.
04:09 There is one clip today where we saw an offensive rebound that he puts back out and then we ended up getting a three.
04:16 And it's like, Hey Billy, like if we do that, good things happen.
04:19 I just want to know, is it a tap back in really count as a field goal attempt?
04:23 Like what?
04:25 Like who like does?
04:27 Yeah, it's a second field goal attempt.
04:29 I put in the work.
04:31 It's not flashy.
04:32 Just gets it done.
04:33 Does Gunnar have the locker room?
04:35 I was the last guy off the bench.
04:36 And then I played two minutes in the first half.
04:39 I genuinely almost punched him.
04:41 I mean, I just wish I played a little more in the game.
04:44 Being the last guy off the bench and then getting subbed out two minutes later was infuriating.
04:49 Gunnar Klemmer is just an idiot.
04:50 Didn't watch warmups at all, which like you kind of get a glimpse of what people are doing out there.
04:55 The buffoon.
04:57 He'll get better because he can't get worse.
04:59 Very hard, no matter how much you deserve it to be subbed out by Chris Klemmer and not want to murder him on the spot.
05:05 Who do you want to sub you out? I'm the coach.
05:08 I'm just saying, I'm just saying when you want to be in the game and Chris Klemmer is telling you you can't play, it's mildly inferior.
05:14 The reason Klemmer decided to coach is because he fancies himself an athlete and realized he was about to be completely exposed.
05:21 I thought John Ritchie was going to fucking murder him.
05:23 He literally told him to go fuck himself when he came off the bench at one point, when he came far enough to the bench at one point.
05:27 Why are you not coaching?
05:29 Wednesday's travel.
05:33 Look around, pays 22 salaries.
05:36 Can you add me to the roster now and I just play the playoffs?
05:39 You are away every single Wednesday.
05:42 But I did the math, dummy. Season's ending around Thanksgiving.
05:45 Alright, Bosco, put you on the playoff roster if that's what you want.
05:48 Why don't we film after the game at a bar and then do post game beers?
05:52 We can do post game beers, Billy. I'm not against post game beers.
05:57 You bring them to the Y.
05:59 Then we film during the expense.
06:01 We almost quit already in the meeting.
06:03 We almost quit. It's a problem.
06:06 Okay, so we're terrible at shooting.
06:08 Can I tell you what it was?
06:10 Go, sure.
06:12 It was we were all feeling each other out.
06:14 You didn't want to shoot sometimes because when you shoot and miss you feel like an asshole.
06:18 You didn't shoot enough because we know you shot enough.
06:21 I still think I shot enough.
06:24 You shot more than me.
06:25 You were one for six?
06:27 Oh, that's too...
06:29 You're giving me shit about...
06:31 Yeah, but my percentage is still better than yours.
06:33 Alright, alright, alright.
06:35 My percentage is still better than yours.
06:37 Triple!
06:39 You were making light of it.
06:40 Great residence, great rebounds. You guys both suck shooting. That sucks.
06:43 I'm sorry that's upsetting.
06:45 It's a fact.
06:47 We should have practiced.
06:49 Yeah, and the player doesn't want to come out when we go.
06:52 Okay, yeah, Billy, that can't happen.
06:54 Point out one point I look tired.
06:56 Do you understand how that's not being routine though?
06:58 If someone's coming in for you to play who maybe hasn't gotten as many minutes as you, let them play.
07:02 I feel a little appreciated.
07:03 You are.
07:04 I appreciate you.
07:05 We just got to fine tune you and then we can get the most out of it.
07:08 I think you have a little bit more upstairs and you're good.
07:12 I can't put this one for six.
07:14 Four for 18.
07:15 You have nothing to say.
07:17 Statistically it's still better than one for six.
07:19 No, it's not.
07:20 It is.
07:21 You shoot and then you miss.
07:22 You suck 18 times.
07:25 But you wouldn't have to read for 18 with this.
07:27 I didn't shoot 18 times because I was shocked.
07:29 His were not going in and he kept shooting.
07:31 They were going in.
07:32 Four of 18's not going in.
07:34 Steve is also in.
07:35 Are you in on this team?
07:37 Yeah, of course.
07:38 I didn't give a fuck.
07:40 Are you on this team?
07:41 Yeah.
07:42 Are you shooting Survivor?
07:43 I'd say I'm similar to Billy.
07:48 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
07:50 You're not going to shoot, but I'm not saying shoot.
07:52 I'm more on the team.
07:53 I like this a lot.
07:54 That's aggressive defense.
07:56 You don't make the layup, but that's great hustle on the way back on the fast break.
08:03 Good job, Billy.
08:04 Good job, Billy.
08:05 That was great.
08:06 [Applause]
08:10 Another bad second roll.
08:11 Yep, wide open.
08:13 Marty just didn't move.
08:15 How about a contest?
08:17 How about one of these?
08:19 That might be worse than Dana not moving.
08:21 This is worse than Dana not moving.
08:22 You're so close and you just refuse to--
08:24 That's so bad.
08:26 How about an arm?
08:27 You've got to pick those arms up.
08:28 You've got wingspin.
08:29 Come on.
08:30 That's just not carry.
08:31 That's just not carry.
08:33 This one, you just can't have--
08:35 That's a bad shot.
08:37 John Riggs.
08:38 That was hard.
08:40 [Whistle blowing]
08:42 Just hustle it.
08:43 Just hustle it.
08:44 This shot is where it goes.
08:45 And this is where--
08:46 That's a foul.
08:47 No, it's not.
08:48 He slapped me in the face.
08:50 You didn't call that.
08:51 We've got to think.
08:52 We've got to take our time there, Billy.
08:54 That's all we're saying.
08:55 Great hustle.
08:56 Just pump, set yourself, see what's up.
08:57 Yeah.
08:58 Bingo.
08:59 [Laughter]
09:02 I like that.
09:04 Full speed.
09:06 Do it again.
09:07 Give me the leg.
09:08 You just jumped too early.
09:10 [Laughter]
09:14 It's a little early to jump.
09:15 Good job, Billy.
09:16 Good job, Billy.
09:18 Good ball rotation.
09:19 Good ball rotation.
09:21 [Applause]
09:22 [Whistle blowing]
09:24 No.
09:25 [Laughter]
09:27 That was a crazy--
09:28 He was hoping.
09:29 Listen to Nick on this.
09:30 When you hear Nick--
09:31 [Whistle blowing]
09:32 No.
09:33 No, Billy.
09:34 No, Billy, no.
09:35 [Laughter]
09:36 That went in like we've gotten so high.
09:38 We've got to start shooting more threes.
09:39 Yeah.
09:40 But we don't need--
09:41 You guys are just missing the main point.
09:42 And we disagree everything you're saying.
09:44 Then you run the team.
09:45 I'm getting annoyed.
09:46 I'm getting annoyed.
09:47 You be the coach now.
09:48 I don't want to be the coach.
09:49 I don't want to play.
09:50 All right, well, then I'm--
09:51 Then I'm--
09:52 I'm good.
09:53 Stop.
09:54 Hey, what's going on?
09:55 What's going on?
09:56 [Indistinct shouting]
09:57 I don't think he knows what he's doing.
09:59 He was trying to just tell us in our film room
10:01 that we shouldn't take threes,
10:02 and that might be because, like,
10:04 when he first started watching basketball,
10:05 they didn't have the three-point line.
10:06 You guys might disagree, then I won't do this.
10:09 You're just so anti-three for no reason.
10:10 I'm not.
10:11 I was trying to make a point.
10:12 And you're being eerie,
10:13 the smarmy shit head again.
10:14 That's all you do.
10:15 Autistic Brad Stevens might be a little bit of an issue for us.
10:18 How about we try to really focus on hitting the two,
10:21 especially if we have a major size advantage,
10:23 and we just focus on that
10:24 as opposed to trying to be skeptical.
10:26 The threes we miss, we don't miss.
10:28 They don't hit anything, and they go out of bounds.
10:30 So let's stop with the shit.
10:31 Other than that, once we get through him,
10:33 should be fine.
10:34 I think--I like the addition of Steve.
10:36 We didn't have Steve last game.
10:37 I think he's gonna bring some athletics in for us,
10:39 and we'll be pretty good.
10:41 And nothing against the team we played.
10:42 They were--they were solid,
10:44 but they were just thrown together.
10:45 They had no time to prepare.
10:47 They didn't know each other,
10:48 and they still tied us.
10:50 I think we're in trouble.
10:52 I don't know why I'm so nervous.
10:54 Tell me why.
10:55 My heart is pumping on my chest for some reason.
10:58 The fouls come so fucking hard in the paint.
11:01 They thought 18 shots was too much.
11:04 I've never looked less athletic in my life.
11:09 Ankle sucks.
11:10 The biggest thing this team needs to work on--
11:12 play smart.
11:13 Tell 'em, "Billy, like, get a rebound."
11:16 Wait a second, then figure it out.
11:17 Give yourself that half second.
11:19 It's one thing we really gotta work on.
11:20 Great intensity from the guys last time.
11:22 Great energy.
11:23 Need to play a lot smarter.
11:25 [players shouting]
11:27 [ball bouncing]
11:30 [players shouting]
11:33 [ball bouncing]
11:36 [players shouting]
11:39 [ball bouncing]
11:41 [players shouting]
11:43 The second game of the season started off
11:45 pretty evenly matched.
11:46 Both teams were kind of trading buckets there
11:48 for a little bit.
11:50 [ball bouncing]
11:53 [players shouting]
11:55 It was pretty clear right off the bat
11:56 they had two or three guys that could play.
11:59 [players shouting]
12:02 [ball bouncing]
12:05 [players shouting]
12:08 Gotta keep the ball inside, too, guys.
12:10 Starting to panic a little bit, reaching out too much.
12:12 Get back in.
12:13 Let's just fucking have fun and just shoot.
12:15 Everyone, Dana, if I'm gonna yell at the ref,
12:17 let me yell at the ref.
12:18 We're too uptight right now.
12:19 We wanna win too bad right now.
12:20 We just gotta get out there and shoot and take some shots.
12:23 [players shouting]
12:27 We all kind of came in a little bit mad at Billy
12:30 for shooting four for 18.
12:32 We need Billy to be never on the three-point line.
12:35 But he's playing out there.
12:37 [ball bouncing]
12:39 [whistle blows]
12:41 He just needed a little coaching.
12:43 He needed just someone to kind of sit him down.
12:45 It wasn't just me.
12:47 It was the team.
12:48 [players shouting]
12:50 [whistle blows]
12:53 [whistle blows]
12:55 Five people on the court, not one, five.
12:58 He threw it late.
13:00 He threw it late.
13:02 We're saying all week long
13:04 we don't need Billy to be this, you know, volume shooter.
13:07 I think Billy even knew.
13:09 Billy also understood, you know, he's gonna put up the front.
13:12 He thinks he can do anything at any time.
13:14 But I think even he knew it was, like, all right,
13:16 the first game was a little much.
13:18 I think with a little bit of tough love, we got through to Billy,
13:20 like, hey, man, you know, we love you.
13:22 We just need you to adapt your game style.
13:24 Take what's given to you.
13:26 [players shouting]
13:29 [applause]
13:31 I mean, we didn't shoot great, but we played great defense.
13:35 Our defense is not bad.
13:36 The offense is horrendous.
13:38 We're gonna get some really good shots.
13:40 Our offense is just horrible right now.
13:43 [whistle blows]
13:45 [applause]
13:48 I took a charge in a men's league game.
13:50 Yes, I know, hard-O, whatever.
13:52 You have to show that you have heart for this team.
13:55 It was a flop and a half. I don't care what he says.
13:57 It's a flop.
13:59 [players shouting]
14:02 Great job, great job.
14:05 We are killing on defense.
14:07 If we're offensive ways like that, we'll--
14:09 We'll write that one down by six.
14:11 Good shit, Marty.
14:13 Dude, there's, like, two guys.
14:16 We can let off your guy and let them shoot.
14:18 You guys are doing a great job on defense.
14:20 This is much improved.
14:21 The only thing we just gotta do about that last play on offense is great.
14:24 [applause]
14:26 [whistle blows]
14:31 Defense was incredible to have in this, like, we're calling it the second quarter.
14:35 Really picked up great play looks, great hustle by everyone.
14:38 John Rich had a great rebound.
14:40 Hubs was diving ball.
14:42 You had a great feel, like, exactly identical.
14:45 Really good.
14:46 Ken Jack has some great picks.
14:48 Come on, coach. Let's go.
14:49 This is good stuff. This is awesome.
14:51 No ass.
14:52 No ass.
14:53 You got a little bone? You got a little bone there?
14:55 I was like, whoa.
14:56 If you keep digging, you'll see what happens.
14:58 There's nothing.
14:59 Start of the second half, we continued to struggle offensively.
15:04 [music]
15:10 [whistle blows]
15:12 [applause]
15:14 You know, we made a couple shots that kind of just kept us in the game.
15:18 [applause]
15:21 Steve, please, I'm so bad at this game.
15:25 Put it in. Put it in.
15:27 [music]
15:29 If anyone needs it, break it.
15:30 All you guys need to do is be ready.
15:32 I mean, I did get two full possessions on court there, but--
15:35 I mean, I got maybe two full possessions on court there, but--
15:38 There was one guy who was killing us in the beginning of the game,
15:40 and I was just like, yo, let me take him.
15:42 Shot him down, he didn't score once the rest of the time.
15:45 [music]
15:49 Shooting 27% is tough.
15:51 I don't care what-- it doesn't even have to be basketball.
15:54 Like, 27% is brutal.
15:56 It was a grind.
15:59 [whistle blows]
16:02 [applause]
16:04 Let's go, Billy.
16:06 Great pass.
16:08 [whistle blows]
16:10 [applause]
16:16 Keep up the intensity.
16:17 Give me the great defense.
16:18 That's going to win us the game.
16:19 Great defense, just like we've been doing.
16:20 We're putting great defense.
16:21 We've got to keep the defense up.
16:22 We cannot let up for a second.
16:24 [music]
16:30 [applause]
16:37 I remember I had an awful turnover,
16:40 tried to make a cool no-look pass to Marty, went out of bounds.
16:43 But then Nick saved my ass on a defensive end
16:47 with a huge block to get us the ball back.
16:50 [whistle blows]
16:53 [whistle blows]
16:56 Tempo, tempo, tempo.
16:58 [whistle blows]
17:04 [whistle blows]
17:07 They had to foul us, and we got the ball to our boy, Jetski.
17:11 And we hoped and prayed that our boy could shoot some free throws.
17:15 [whistle blows]
17:16 Jetski's got it.
17:18 Jetski's our best shooter.
17:20 I've not always been a great jump shooter.
17:21 Athletically, I'm always there, but even from the free throw line,
17:24 like, don't always consistently hit.
17:26 So I was definitely nervous
17:28 and didn't want the loss to be on my shoulders if it happened.
17:31 So first one, I just kind of shot put, thank God,
17:35 like, eased the tension a little bit.
17:38 [applause]
17:40 Second one, I think the adderall must have kicked in
17:42 because it was just onions, man, nothing but net.
17:45 And couldn't have been a better feeling.
17:47 Walked off feeling like, you know, Ray Allen hitting the corner three for a win.
17:52 So it was great.
17:54 They're taking too much time.
17:56 There's like 7, 8 seconds of fucking fouling without shooting.
17:59 We're up 3.
18:01 I don't know.
18:02 [laughter]
18:03 No, I don't--
18:04 That's what we do.
18:05 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
18:06 I like it, but we have to really get the right time.
18:09 It's 10 seconds or less in the clock.
18:11 Does that make sense?
18:12 We said 7.
18:14 [chatter]
18:18 Not before.
18:20 We just introduced six different ideas
18:23 and sent them all back out onto the court.
18:26 [chatter]
18:32 I talk a lot of shit about these college players, NBA, when I'm betting on them.
18:36 Your brain goes scrambled when you're out there.
18:38 You don't know what happens.
18:40 [chatter]
18:50 Thanks to God they missed it because this whole video would have been about me
18:54 if they hit it.
18:55 [chatter]
19:07 [whistle]
19:10 [chatter]
19:18 Do not foul.
19:20 If you foul, I'm benching in the first half.
19:22 I will bench your ass.
19:24 I will bench your ass.
19:25 Listen to the coach.
19:28 I'll be a free safety.
19:30 No foul.
19:31 [chatter]
19:32 It's good to tell a climber what to do in that moment
19:35 and in all those last few minutes leading up to that game.
19:39 He didn't know to advance the ball.
19:41 He didn't know how many timeouts to grab.
19:42 He didn't know when to call a timeout.
19:44 That was chaos.
19:46 If he fouls, he's going to have PDs and bridges.
19:48 Those imprints are going to be on his ass.
19:50 [chatter]
20:00 Let's go, boys.
20:01 That's how you do it.
20:02 That's what you talk about.
20:03 [chatter]
20:09 101, baby.
20:12 Let's go, boys.
20:15 That was close.
20:16 We really shouldn't have made the free throw.
20:18 [applause]
20:21 Did he hit that three?
20:22 It was like in the air.
20:24 I won the foul so bad, but I don't want to be sad for the first set of the game.
20:28 What a win, boys.
20:30 I was shooting free throws.
20:31 Great defense, great intent.
20:34 We played like that.
20:35 We're undefeated.
20:36 101.
20:37 Just great.
20:39 I'm so happy.
20:40 I'm very happy.
20:45 I know.
20:46 We played great defense.
20:47 Smart.
20:48 You're right.
20:49 Basketball Q jumps like 50 points between last week and now.
20:51 It did.
20:52 Great urgency.
20:53 And that was a way better team than last week.
20:55 Way better team.
20:56 And I love the offensive plays you guys were doing.
20:59 Don't sleep on us.
21:00 I guess we were going to have one win this year, and we have one win in one tie.
21:04 Undefeated, baby.
21:05 We're already beating the predictions.
21:10 We can't fucking play more than 30 seconds without a foul or a whistle.
21:14 Is he going to beat the shit out of us if we talk shit like that?
21:17 [cheering]
21:18 It's going to be a letdown game.
21:19 It's a letdown game situation.
21:20 Let's go.
21:21 Hey, come on.
21:22 Get your head out of your fucking ass.
21:24 [whistle]
21:26 I'm worried about him.
21:27 I'm guessing it's just a sprain, but I'm not a doctor.
21:29 Went too hard in the paint and snapped my ankle.
21:32 [music]
21:33 (upbeat music)
21:35 (upbeat music)