Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about an x-ray that revealed a guy had family jewels in his butt and Lisa thought that it might have meant something different.
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00:00a suspected jewel thief in turkey has been arrested after stolen rings and necklaces
00:13were found in his rectum during an x-ray exam the suspect identified as oa was arrested after
00:22police investigating a break-in noticed his peculiar walk oh it's a tough i mean i got
00:29jewels it would be hard walking with a butt full of jewels oh it sure would that guy's walking like
00:34you got pirate treasure up there because i do but in this amazing coincidence those objects belonged
00:40to that x-ray technician's family oh that's weird this dude with the stuff up his butt
00:47had stolen the stuff from the x-ray tech's family's house it's funny when i read the headline for that
00:53story it said um they found like this family jewels up there and i thought like i was thinking
00:59oh his family's balls i was like found his balls and then i read the story and i was like oh so
01:08unimpressed after that i'm like oh just regular family jewels he had his balls in his ass yeah
01:13like lisa had the story of the century she would have rushed into my office i would have she would
01:21have like she only breaks in when she finds the craziest stories yeah dave do you have the guy
01:26with the balls in his ass okay good i was thinking that too i was like i gotta get this to dave right
01:30away breaking news dave lisa runs down the hallway like old school news yeah like i come around the
01:37corner she knocks me out of the way move no time to explain dave look dave from what i gather from
01:44the headlines his balls are in his ass so in your mind you had already like because you like she went there
01:51you concoct the story so you're like this guy's been on he couldn't find his balls
01:55there was a long time we're like oh where is he and some doctor was like oh hey i'll write this
02:00butthole there yeah you said it there in your butthole is this in the anti-green radio program oh my god
02:08stop what you're doing and listen this came right from a woman which is shocking that she can find
02:12anything and even read for that matter but what a story about a man's balls right in his butthole
02:18can you believe that it's impossible it can't happen it's an anomaly of science build the world
02:25be ready for a butthole balls guy so he thought he lost them then he couldn't find him his entire life
02:31somebody left to look up his butthole there they are fingers right there two balls family jewels
02:37in his butthole his baby factory is right there in his butthole i'm live at the scene and i uh
02:43yes jack you're a man i trust you go ahead yes i'm live at the scene and uh sure enough
02:48his balls are directly in his ass right now in his butthole you say they're right in his butthole
02:54oh my god deep deep deep inside exclusive from the anti-green radio program doctors are working
03:00on a solution now i never admit that i was wrong but i was totally against hiring a woman for this
03:05program but god damn it lisa way has found a hell of a story i must concede so did my disappointment
03:13when i clicked on the story and saw like actual jewels i'm like ah what family jewels
03:22yeah pretty it does you know i just realized that same headlines on my story here finds family
03:29jewels and suspects yeah some dude that wrote that was like yeah i'm gonna mess with some people
03:34must be me yeah lisa's like oh my god she thought she had the perfect dave and chuck the freak story
03:40i did sweet jesus and the other end some other guy's like i've lost my balls guys i have no idea
03:47where my suspect yeah the suspect who's gone has my balls and they're in a guy's butt you guys my balls
03:54are gone oh i'm like well let me let me take let me take a look dude i can't see him anywhere
04:03you can't see him i'm looking closely i chuck tell us what you got on that uh looks like a
04:09oh my god stretch his sack is leading somewhere oh yeah where's it going it's going oh boy
04:17oh no what do you got on us i believe it's up his ass oh dear christ
04:24yeah how does this even happen i don't know this whole world is going to crap man
04:30any green radio program was not ready for such a day that would live in infamy great headline but
04:35yeah no it was actually uh a certain family's jewels not this guy's balls although we have seen that
04:40too yes we've seen but you've seen why i didn't think it was that crazy in the b in the b in the b
04:46yeah once you've seen it you know it can happen yeah we haven't seen have we seen its own no it's
04:53time to see it that's why i thought it was breaking news so i'm searching for here is guy
04:57puts balls in his own ass yes that's what i'm searching for that is i'm gonna leave
05:05oh no you want to see it no you want to see it oh you want to see it oh my god you want to see it
05:12oh no oh ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow oh oh they keep falling didn't go in didn't go in
05:24and they keep falling out.
05:25They go in, but they fall out.
05:28What?
05:31It's going to hurt.
05:33It's going to hurt the way she's pushing them.
05:35She's squeezing them.
05:36I don't think there's a way to be gentle
05:40and get them in there.
05:42He just needs to relax a little bit.
05:44Yeah, relax, dude. Relax.
05:46It'll hurt less.
05:47Is that the longest sack you've ever seen in your life?
05:49It is long.
05:51It's in! It's in!
05:53It's in! It's in!
05:56Oh my god, damn.
05:58So that's what Lisa thought.
05:59Well, there you go. Family jewels.
06:02But not that kind.
06:04It doesn't even matter, because the headline alone
06:06just made us take it there.
06:08So it's perfect. Absolutely.