Jake Shane is just being honest about how he’d handle these real-life Confessays from Cosmo readers—even if he doesn’t totally relate. From flirty texts written by ChatGPT—A(I) for effort!—to stressing over a partner’s body count (‘Love Island’ has entered the chat), Jake may not have lived through every scenario, but his advice still hits. If he said “I love you” first and didn’t hear it back? You better bet he’s pulling a Blair Waldorf and saying, “XOXO, ‘Gossip Girl.’” And when it comes to sexy pics...he’s not sending one. Plus, watch as he tells one unfortunate star sign combo to run and explains why Grindr is *not* for making friends.
Stream ‘Therapuss with Jake Shane’ here: https://pod.link/1723626781
Get tickets for Jake’s tour ‘Live With Jake Shane!’ here: https://passthatpuss.com/pages/live-with-jake-shane
#JakeShane #Therapuss #IfItWereMe #Cosmopolitan
Stream ‘Therapuss with Jake Shane’ here: https://pod.link/1723626781
Get tickets for Jake’s tour ‘Live With Jake Shane!’ here: https://passthatpuss.com/pages/live-with-jake-shane
#JakeShane #Therapuss #IfItWereMe #Cosmopolitan
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PeopleTranscript
00:00One time I went on a date with someone from Grindr and he told me that he wanted to be
00:04friends. So like that's crazy from Grindr. You know what I mean? I'm Jake Shane and this is If
00:09It Were Me. Today I'm going through real life confesses from Cosmo readers and telling you
00:16how I would handle the situation. Am I nervous for this? Um no. Okay. Okay I'm gonna be honest
00:26in these. The Blockers. I just moved back in with my parents to save some money. It's
00:31been a month and I'm in serious need of human touch. The issue is my parents never leave
00:36the house. Is it crazy if I invite a Tinder hookup over while they're home? Like not crazy
00:44but definitely uncomfortable. I've actually been in that situation so many times. You
00:49they will leave the house eventually. They will. It's just like super awkward if they're
00:55like what are you doing? You know what I mean? I would never. To my parents I could
00:59never. It's not crazy like if you have that relationship with your parents I feel like
01:02that's fine but like no I just personally wouldn't do it. I do have crazy dating app
01:08stories and none of them are appropriate for this at all. I'm trying to think of like one
01:14that I can actually share. Um well no. One time I went on a date with someone from Grindr
01:22and he told me that he wanted to be friends. So like that's crazy from Grindr. You know
01:27what I mean? A. I love you. My friend sent me up on a date with one of her guy friends
01:32and we've been texting non-stop ever since. I thought we had a connection until my friend
01:36let it slip that he uses chat GBT to craft his flirty text. Should I continue talking to
01:41him or cut it off? I would continue talking to him. I don't see the problem. At least he's
01:46talking to you. I will also say about this the reason I don't think it's bad is because
01:50like he obviously cares enough that he doesn't want to sound stupid so he's like putting
01:54the extra he's going the extra mile. Maybe the my bar is in hell though so I don't I don't
02:00know. The scorekeeper. The guy I've been seeing for five months casually mentioned his body count
02:06when we were talking about past relationships. To say I was shocked would be an understatement.
02:11Am I prude to let it bother me? No I don't think you're prude to let it bother you but I would
02:17reverse the situations and would you be upset if he was upset with your body count? And I would
02:22prescribe that episode of Love Island where they do the challenge and they have to reveal their body
02:27counts. How much do you get into discussing exes with like your current relationships?
02:36I've never had a relationship so I've never had an ex so both sides of that question are
02:41not applicable to me. Body counts don't matter to me. Once again I will take what I can get.
02:50No but gay people do all the time and it's wild. Star-crossed lovers. I asked to see my
02:56situationship's birth chart and to my horror we are completely astrologically incompatible.
03:00I'm now questioning if it's meant to be. I usually take my horoscope with a grain of salt
03:04but should I take this as a sign to break it off? Well it's okay. For me it's like there's not many fish
03:10so it's like I'll take what I can get and I really mean that. I will take what I can get
03:15but if there's more fish out there and you're already seeing signs then yeah cut it off. I mean
03:21it depends how bad the star sign situation is. Like if it was Scorpio Leo I would say run. Actually
03:28bolt. Three little words. After dating my boyfriend for two months I said I love you. It just kind of
03:35slipped out but he didn't say it back. It's now been another month and he still hasn't said it. How do I
03:39casually bring it up to him? I would also be super upset if that happened to me but I think the
03:44proper advice is you just have to play like you don't care. If men think that you don't care then
03:50they'll act accordingly. Never say it again. Ever. Until he says it. And watch that episode of Gossip
03:59Girl where Chuck doesn't say it back. Or no is it Blair that doesn't say it back? Yeah it's Blair huh?
04:04I love Gossip Girl. Work it out. I've had a crush on one of my co-workers ever since he joined the
04:10company but never acted on it. This week he sent me an I miss you text when I was out sick. Oh.
04:16Should I take this as a sign to make a move or keep it strictly professional? Like I think you can
04:20make a move but a subtle move. Nothing too crazy. I think he's opened the door for flirtatious
04:27back and forths but nothing like too adventurous. Oh my god always. Yeah always.
04:39Have you ever done anything about it? Nope. Never. Nope. No. Phone a friend. I'm in London for the
04:45summer and hooked up with a rando inside one of those iconic red phone booths in the heat of a
04:50drunk moment. Fun change of scenery but extremely out of character for me. Now he's asking if I want to do
04:55it again. Should I say yes? I don't know. I feel like planning spontaneity is like takes away from
05:00all of it. And like the point of that was that it was spontaneous. So maybe just be like no but you
05:06can take me for a drink. Or like something else. You know what I mean? Like segue it into a date if
05:12that's what you're aiming for. I guess I'm not spontaneous when it comes to dating. Now it's time
05:19for the quickie. Big spoon or little spoon? Little spoon. Send a sexy pic or receive a sexy pic? I'd
05:26probably rather receive a sexy pic because I don't want to send one. Block your ex or stalk them on
05:31social media? Stalk them on social media. Break up IRL or ghost them? I mean it's just not applicable
05:38to me. It's never. I've never had to deal. But like I guess I could say ghost. Soft launch or hard
05:44launch. A mix of both. Soft to the hard. Dinner date or movie date? Movie date. I'm a really messy
05:51eater. So I hate eating in front of my date. I hate it. I had to do it last night and it was
05:55diabolical. Thanks for watching and make sure to check out Live with Jake Shane coming to a city
06:00near you and new episodes of Therapist with Jake Shane out every Wednesday at 7 p.m. Pacific.
06:14week.
06:25week.
06:27week.
06:31week.