Video Information: IIT Kharagpur, 04.02.2022, Greater Noida, India
Context:
~ What are humiliation and insult?
~ How does suffering help the one?
~ How to realize one's true strength?
~ How should we control our emotions?
~ How to get rid of emotional thoughts?
Music Credits: Milind Date
~~~~~
#emotions #acharyaprashant
Context:
~ What are humiliation and insult?
~ How does suffering help the one?
~ How to realize one's true strength?
~ How should we control our emotions?
~ How to get rid of emotional thoughts?
Music Credits: Milind Date
~~~~~
#emotions #acharyaprashant
Category
📚
LearningTranscript
00:00Namaskar Acharyaji. I am Lohitha Vasnik. I am a second year undergraduate student of
00:10Department of Mining Engineering. So, my question is how should I control my emotions so that
00:19they don't become too extreme in positive as well as in negative situations. Actually
00:25it happens to me every time that whenever I achieve my goal, I feel so happy. On that day,
00:32I am so happy. But if I got failed, I start cursing myself. I start crying that I can't do
00:39this. So, how should I behave in a normal way? How should I behave in a neutral way?
00:46Remember the real goal. Remember the real goal.
00:55Whatsoever you have achieved is too little in front of the real goal. So,
01:02there is no need to be too happy. And irrespective of how little you have achieved,
01:10there is all the potential to achieve the real goal. So, there is no need to be too sad.
01:21You forget the real thing and you start taking small things as big.
01:28So, when you get those small things in your palm, you feel as if the entire world is there on your
01:36palm. It's nothing. It's a globe, not the world, worth very little. The celebrations are misplaced.
01:54Equally, irrespective of whether the little thing is a globe or a kid's little plastic ball,
02:05the fact is that you are born to achieve the real goal. That is the purpose of your birth.
02:12Otherwise, you wouldn't have gone. So, there is no need for any gloom or despondency.
02:24Misplaced celebration is just as bad as depression.
02:29Misplaced celebration is foolish happiness and depression. If I may say, it might sound
02:40insensitive to some, but I'll proceed. It's just foolish sadness.
02:47But I'll proceed. It's just foolish sadness.
02:53Right? You are never in too good a position as long as you are alive. Because you are alive,
03:02so the work is still incomplete. So, you can never be in so good a position
03:09that you think that the work is complete and you start partying and put a full stop to the journey.
03:22No. Equally, irrespective of how bad your condition is, you still have a chance. So, you can party.
03:39So, what am I saying with respect to partying? I'm saying when there is a lot of temptation to party,
03:50remember it's not the time to party.
03:55And when you feel like sulking in your loneliness and weeping on the pillow,
04:03that exactly is the time to party.
04:09So, yes, we are all allowed to celebrate and party, but not in ignorance.
04:23All celebration must have wisdom at its core.
04:27Life is ruthless a lot of times. And when it hits you at just the wrong places and terribly hard, that's when you must party.
04:44And when it's very obvious that nice and pleasant things are happening,
04:50you should know a trap is being laid out for you. Avoid the party. Avoid the party then.
05:02Okay. Thank you, sir.
05:09Sir, I have a follow-up question to this. Why is it not the right thing to be on the road?
05:17Okay. Thank you, sir.
05:26Sir, I have a follow-up question to this. Why is it not the right thing to be on the extremities
05:32of our emotions? If she's sad, she'll be sad for a time and then she'll be happy in another time.
05:41It's like she'll let loose everything, maybe let loose all her consciousness for some time.
05:47Why is it not good for a person?
05:51It's not that it is not good. It's just that it is not your nature.
05:58Also, the kind of self-correcting mechanism you are talking of does not exist in all people
06:07and at all times. You are saying if someone is feeling sad or down,
06:16then let that person plunge into the depths of sadness and from there,
06:21she will bounce back on her own. That may happen. That may also not happen.
06:29Further, that may take a lot of time to happen. Further, in your misplaced feeling of sadness,
06:39you might take certain decisions that are irreversible.
06:45At least, you might take decisions that lead to a loss of lot of time and that is irreversible.
06:53Equally, when you are unnecessarily jubilant, you may again make decisions that may cost you dearly
07:05or at least you will waste time. So, that's why these extremities
07:13are to be avoided, both being false. Anything false is avoidable.
07:22But like, just a second, I feel that being at extremities will allow a person to
07:33maybe explore that side and gain more clarity regarding the situation.
07:40If that person had such a knack for exploration, why would he have landed at the extremity for
07:50the first of all? What makes you land at that extreme? Your unconscious self, right?
08:01Because you don't know yourself, therefore you find yourself in depths of despair or clouds of
08:08happiness. That's because you are unconscious towards yourself. That's because you have not
08:15explored yourself fully or deeply. Now, you are saying,
08:23being in those depths, I will suddenly become conscious and start exploring.
08:28That may happen by virtue of grace. More likely, that may not happen.
08:36So, it is more of like just a safe play to be in between and oscillate?
08:46No, not in between. You have to seek safety at the only place where it exists. It exists
08:53only in your consciousness. The two extremes are extremes of unconscious darkness.
09:01They are not to be avoided because they are extremes. They are to be avoided because
09:09they exist only in your ignorance. Only in your ignorance can you become very happy or very sad.
09:18Ignorance is to be avoided. It's ignorance that is avoidable. Extremes, well, if you can be
09:28at your joyful best, in your most conscious state, wonderful, why not?
09:36Why not? That's the entire purpose of consciousness, to bring you to one particular extreme.
09:44That extremity is very auspicious. So, it is not as if extremes are to be avoided for
09:53the sake of being extreme. Extremes are to be avoided because these extremes
10:00that our friend was referring to are extremes of ignorance. Ignorance is avoidable.
10:13Sir, I have a doubt like being conscious about our happiness and being unconscious about the same.
10:20What's the difference as in, is it like if I know the exact reason, yeah, I'm happy for this and it
10:27is right for me that, yeah, I'm happy. Is it like I'm conscious and I'm just happy? Is it the
10:35unconscious state? Mostly, when we are just happy, we do not even know where the happiness is coming
10:44from. You go to a monkey, for example, you show it a banana, right? The monkey immediately moves
10:59towards the banana, stretches its hand, leans towards it, tries to jump. Does the monkey know
11:06why it is doing such a thing? That's the quality. Exactly. But does it know what the banana means
11:15to it or whatever? Does it even have time or the intention to reflect? This is called compulsive
11:26behavior and the monkey for sure induced a certain, the banana for sure induced a certain happiness in
11:33the monkey. That is the quality of most of our happiness. We see a banana, we get happy.
11:44We do not know what is the quality of this happiness, where is it coming from and what
11:49will it do to us? Is it taking us to the place where we need to be or is it just an animalistic
11:57thing, the old ancient pleasure-seeking tendency that does us no good?
12:10So, when these thoughts arise, when emotions arise,
12:17then a human being as opposed to an animal has to know what is really going on.
12:24The animal just gives in. The animal neither reflects nor pauses. It does not really have
12:33any need to reflect or pause because it has no urge towards liberation in the first place.
12:39But you being a human being, if you behave like animals, then you will suffer.
12:45The monkey does not suffer for being a monkey.
12:52But a human being will suffer deeply for being a monkey.
12:59So, we have to be knowledgeable. Self-knowledge is about knowing your inner processes.
13:09Where do your tendencies come from? How is one aspect of your behavior linked to the other thing?
13:14What is your relationship with the world? What is the content of your mind? Where do your
13:20insecurities come from? Where do your plans come from? Happiness, sadness and so many other things.
13:27What is it going on within? This is something exclusive to human beings. We must reflect.
13:34Sir, I have this question which I was supposed to ask afterwards, but I think it will make more
13:40sense now. When we wake up or we maybe say I'm doing meditation and I'm purifying myself or the
13:50image or my mood and I come afresh. But after some time, I feel again, I feel impure because
14:00of the behavior of people around me. As in, my question is how to focus on ourselves and not get
14:07affected by what others say or do. If meditation brings that purity in the mind,
14:16why don't you continue your meditation all through the day?
14:24Because we do have to work.
14:28Which means you love something more than purity.
14:33So, you get what you love. You do not love purity. You do not get it. You love something else. You get it.
14:44No, I mean, I do love what I do.
14:49My whole point was, when we wake up, we are totally fresh. I feel like there's a clean image,
14:56but throughout the day, that image gets dirty. From image, I mean, you can say a piece of cloth
15:02that gets dirty, our soul.
15:04So, why don't you then spend your day, your entire day, as if
15:11you are still fresh? You know what fresh means? Not tainted, not corrupted.
15:17Fresh means something that has just come up from the source.
15:22So, why don't you live your entire life that way, in a certain freshness?
15:28No idea.
15:32One requires love for that.
15:36The meditation that most people practice is a very limited thing.
15:42Therefore, it can be very difficult to practice.
15:46So, you have to be very careful about what you are doing.
15:50You have to be very careful about what you are doing.
15:53Most people practice is a very limited thing.
15:57Therefore, it can give you that purity you talked of only for a limited period.
16:05Its effect wanes off very rapidly, but it gives you some relief.
16:12So, you come back to it every morning.
16:16The thing is to remain meditative your entire day, and if you have to be meditative your
16:22entire day, then that kind of meditation will not help.
16:29That kind of meditation can at best initiate you, but it cannot carry you the distance.
16:39Right?
16:43Still, it's very unclear in my mind.
16:46I didn't say it can become clear so quickly.
16:52I have no illusions of that nature.
17:00It took me several decades to utter these simple sentences.
17:10You will take at least a few years of listening.
17:22See, please understand this.
17:23You are asking this question because you are missing something.
17:27Right?
17:28What do you miss?
17:29You miss that purity, that freshness.
17:31These are the words you used.
17:34When we miss something, we say we love it.
17:40Right?
17:41When you love someone and that someone is not present, you say, oh, I missed you.
17:46So, missing something is meaningful only in the context of love.
17:52Right?
17:54Are you with me till here?
17:56Yes, sir.
17:57Okay.
17:58So, let that love deepen.
18:02Let that love deepen.
18:04That's why I said continue your meditation throughout, and then you cannot sit and meditate.
18:13Therefore, you have to talk and meditate, walk and meditate, eat and meditate,
18:20run and meditate, quarrel and meditate.
18:25That's meditation 24-7.
18:31And that can happen only if you have love for that purity.
18:36That can happen only when you are not thinking of methods as meditation.
18:43Mostly what we call as meditation is just a few methods.
18:47Methods are not meditation.
18:49Meditation is something internal and meditation is nothing that you can really practice.
18:57Meditation is something that you can only remember.
19:03Meditation is to remember that one thing continuously.
19:09That one thing that has no name, no form, no shape.
19:12It exists both as a hard core within us and also as a hollow, a void within us.
19:26That has to be continuously remembered.
19:28Only that can keep you fresh.
19:31Otherwise, the world will be very quick to taint you.
19:34You wake up and your mind will be full of thoughts.
19:37You wake up and your mind will be full of thoughts.
19:40Thoughts taint us.
19:45Thoughts of miscellaneous things.
19:47Thought of this, thought of that.
19:50Meditation is to remember that there is something far more important,
19:54far more lovable than this and that.
19:58So these thoughts, even if they are there, they do not carry great importance.
20:04That is meditation.
20:07So, personally for me, meditation is like being at, I call it ground state for myself,
20:25when I'm not feeling myself, as in I'm just, I'm not even happy, I'm not even sad.
20:33I'm just there.
20:35I mean, maybe I'm not just there.
20:37When I'm not thinking about a lot of things, or maybe I'm not thinking about anything,
20:42but you can say, okay, like I've switched on my net.
20:46And the moment I turn on my net, there'll be lots of messages on my phone.
20:51So I avoid that first thing in the morning to keep myself fresh.
20:55But the moment I do that, I just feel like the world, I don't know what it's putting on me.
21:03So either throw away your phone, permanently disconnect your net.
21:12I do feel like doing that.
21:14No, you feel like doing that, but you will never do that.
21:17So if you will never do that, then you better figure out a way
21:24to coexist in peace with some of that.
21:29I said some of that, because in peace, a lot of that will become irrelevant,
21:33and you will not need it.
21:35Only that part of the messages or the worldly contacts
21:39is going to remain that is really useful and auspicious.
21:47Not switching on the net is no solution at all, because we are born into the net.
21:57Life itself is the net.
21:59You really have no option to never switch it on.
22:03Sooner than later, it will be switched on.
22:06Even if you keep it switched off in one way, it is already switched on in several other ways.
22:12So you have to remain meditative in the middle of the net.
22:17And that can happen only when the mind is in love.
22:28The mind is in a very subtle love,
22:38a remembrance of something that is far more valuable than any of these things outside of us.
22:45You look at anything and it's not tempting enough, not promising enough.
22:49Obviously, things have their utility, their value, their practical functionalities.
22:53So we have things for that purpose, but things are things.
23:03Things are not love.
23:03Okay, it means loving simplicity in a way that other things can't tempt you.
23:23You're coming closer.
23:24Yes.
23:34Now I'm not even thinking about anything.
23:40That's how you get glimpses.
23:42And these glimpses are the opportunity to fall in love.
23:46Thank you so much, Acharyaji.