• 5 months ago
#Hoshyarian #HaroonRafiq #SaleemAlbela #GogaPasroori #AghaMajid #ArzuuFatima #ComedyShow #Funny #Entertainment

Haroon Rafiq ki Qasai say Larai, Amanat ki Shamat Agai
Transcript
00:00Yes, Irza.
00:01Mr. Haroon, we have invited two identical twins to the show.
00:05The two sitting in the front?
00:06Yes.
00:07What's the story behind this?
00:09God bless you. Bring the pair.
00:11I saw a big singer, so I brought two.
00:14They are identical twins.
00:15They sing very well and they sing the same way.
00:18Really?
00:18Their voices are the same too?
00:20Yes, the same.
00:20Why are there two?
00:21Keep one carefully.
00:23If one breaks, then...
00:25God bless you.
00:26The twins have two parathas.
00:27Okay, they have two parathas.
00:31God bless you, they have two parathas.
00:32Their faces are the same too.
00:33Yes.
00:34If one breaks, then he loses.
00:35If the other breaks, then he wins.
00:36I didn't bring them.
00:39What's the story behind this?
00:40Why two? Why not one?
00:42We'll have to ask our parents why two?
00:46They were wondering why two.
00:48Where did uncle and auntie bring them?
00:51Okay, I want to check something about identical twins.
00:56Okay.
00:57You both stand here.
01:00And turn your backs to each other.
01:02You face this way and you face that way.
01:05Okay.
01:05Yes, yes.
01:06Don't look at each other. Stay away.
01:08Okay, and don't look back.
01:10Look straight ahead.
01:12Now, both of you...
01:13You look that way too.
01:14Okay, both of you raise one hand.
01:18Did you see?
01:19Yes.
01:19Lower it.
01:20Now, you don't have to look at me.
01:22Both of you raise one leg.
01:26Did you see?
01:27Yes.
01:27They don't know which leg the other is raising.
01:31But only one leg.
01:33Wow!
01:34Are you noticing?
01:35Yes.
01:35Wow!
01:36You did a great job.
01:39If Mr. Agha was here with us...
01:41Yes, he'd be here with us.
01:42Okay, and when you were born...
01:43When he was born, nothing happened to Manni for two or three days.
01:54Greetings, sir.
01:55Greetings. Who are you?
01:56Bring him here quickly.
01:58Mr. Arun, they are twins but they are not identical.
02:01Really?
02:02Yes.
02:02I understood from their examples.
02:05What?
02:06The butcher himself came here to butcher me.
02:12Okay, who are you?
02:13I'll tell you, sir. I'm a doctor.
02:14He's a butcher.
02:15I'm a teacher.
02:17Who's the senior?
02:18You are, sir.
02:18Then, Mr. Sajid...
02:20Don't call me senior. Call me more senior.
02:23You are talking like this.
02:24I'm like you and me.
02:29He's right.
02:31Okay, don't say it.
02:35Why do you have to do this?
02:36We don't want to make a sacrifice.
02:38Our son is sick. We want to give charity to the goat.
02:41You should be here for Eid.
02:44It's your turn now. What can we do?
02:47I did it yesterday.
02:48I did it the day before yesterday. I did it yesterday as well.
02:50It's their turn now.
02:51It's been a long time since we celebrated Eid.
02:54It's been a long time since we celebrated Eid.
02:55It's been a month.
02:56We do the sacrifice on Eid.
02:58We do it on Eid as well.
02:59But, there's a continuation of Eid.
03:01Would I have taken care of the animals after such a long time?
03:03When there's a patchwork after a month,
03:05don't we ask you to wear continuity clothes?
03:09Who's the educated butcher here?
03:11What's your story?
03:11Do you use a knife or do you cut it with a saw?
03:14I'm not using a knife. I'm using a saw.
03:16For the first time, I've seen a butcher
03:19wearing such a nice watch.
03:21No, it's not a watch. My hand is like this.
03:24I bought it from the market.
03:25My wife gifted it to me.
03:27Listen, we're here to make a sacrifice.
03:29We don't want to leave without making a sacrifice.
03:32Is he a fool?
03:33No.
03:34I thought he had a back surgery.
03:36But, it turned out to be a massage.
03:38We don't want to do it. Let's leave.
03:40Brother, we don't have time.
03:43Let's sit over there.
03:44No, let's sit over there.
03:45Do you think you're lucky?
03:47No, I don't think so.
03:49Trust me, if you sit on the side,
03:50you'll see that half of the floor is covered with wax.
03:54A butcher would have said,
03:57here's your money.
03:59Brother, sorry. We haven't prepared our animal.
04:02Oh, is it?
04:05You're looking so bad.
04:06We don't want to leave without making a sacrifice.
04:09We don't want to leave without making a sacrifice.
04:11We don't want to leave without making a sacrifice.
04:14Okay, fine.
04:15Let's leave. We don't want to make a sacrifice.
04:16We'll leave now.
04:17No, we don't have any animal.
04:19What do you mean?
04:20Brother, we don't have any animal.
04:22Yes.
04:23Brother, I have a weak eyesight.
04:25The other day, I made a sacrifice of a calf.
04:27I didn't make a sacrifice of a calf.
04:29Oh.
04:30Yes, he made a sacrifice of a calf.
04:33You're getting angry.
04:35Open your mouth.
04:36Why?
04:36Because we slaughtered a calf.
04:40Tell me, how much money are you taking
04:42to slaughter a goat?
04:43Give him the money.
04:45Rs. 15,000.
04:46Rs. 15,000?
04:47Yes, if we want to make a sacrifice.
04:49If we want to make a sacrifice, it's Rs. 30,000.
04:50Rs. 30,000?
04:52Sir, look at the rate of the goat.
04:53Where did it go?
04:54You're not a goat.
04:57And listen to me.
04:58Yes.
04:58If you want to make a sacrifice,
05:00you have to give us your calf.
05:01You have to give us your calf
05:03and you'll give us your knife as well.
05:04No, no, no.
05:05The knife is ours.
05:06We're professionals.
05:07Your calf.
05:08Our calf?
05:09Yes.
05:09And our calf?
05:10Yes.
05:11Then what is this?
05:11This is my sister's.
05:13What?
05:13Oh.
05:14Okay, okay.
05:16Brother, you can go.
05:18Mr. Haroon will do a good job.
05:19Yes.
05:20My sister will do a good job.
05:22Give us our money and we'll go.
05:23What money?
05:24We didn't come here to make a sacrifice.
05:26We'll book a car.
05:27What did you do?
05:28I didn't do anything.
05:30The thing is,
05:31the actor gets paid on the day of the shoot.
05:33That's why the butcher
05:34runs away with the goat.
05:41That's why the butcher says,
05:43you had a cow.
05:44I said, how did you get a cow?
05:46I searched for it.
05:48I found out today
05:49that the cow was eaten by a goat.
05:51I am sorry.
05:52I am not shaming the body.
05:53But you should be fit to slaughter animals.
05:56You can't do this with so much body weight.
05:58You don't know.
06:00You got a nail punch.
06:01We don't keep a cow.
06:03That's why the goat doesn't move.
06:05What did you say?
06:06I have seen a lot of people
06:07who let go of the goat.
06:08Really?
06:08Yes.
06:09They don't tie the rope.
06:10They tie it and let it go.
06:12That's why the butcher
06:14runs away with the goat.
06:15I got it.
06:17That's why the butcher
06:18ties the goat's eyes.
06:20It comes out and says,
06:21here you go.
06:23That's why the butcher says on Sundays,
06:24let go of the goat.
06:27What a nice saying.
06:30That's a good one.
06:35Butcher,
06:36have you ever slaughtered a camel?
06:38No.
06:40You don't know.
06:41Baby, who has slaughtered a camel?
06:42Tell me.
06:43Me.
06:43Yes, he has.
06:46No, he hasn't.
06:47What are you doing?
06:48What is this?
06:49I had a goat.
06:49I raised it since it was a baby.
06:51Yes.
06:51I used to do it like this.
06:55I used to do it like this.
06:55You do it in his memory.
06:57I will tell you something.
06:58Yes.
06:59We don't have a butcher.
07:00Okay.
07:01He used to do this to us.
07:02He used to give us a slap.
07:03Hey, move back.
07:04Come here.
07:05Tell me.
07:05I will kill him.
07:07We will kill him today.
07:08We will kill him.
07:10I will kill him.
07:11I will kill him.
07:12He has come directly from the UK.
07:14Brother, did you work in a film?
07:16Hey, you fool.
07:18You used to do it like this in the background.
07:20I did it like this in Jurassic Park.
07:23What was in it?
07:24Jurassic Park.
07:25This is the first entry of a dinosaur.
07:29What was happening in Jurassic Park?
07:30Look, what a respectable man is doing for his stomach.
07:36Okay, go from here.
07:38We had a film.
07:39Which one?
07:39The one where..
07:43You are such a funny man.
07:44Get out of here.
07:45This was also a film.
07:47Which film was it?
07:47The one where he will bend.
07:49Yes, that was the one where he won't bend.
07:50No, sir.
07:51He won't bend for the sake of his health.
07:56I could hear you laughing so loudly.
08:00Oh.
08:00I don't laugh that loudly.
08:03When he was laughing, his stomach was also moving.
08:07How do you laugh?
08:10Haroon, if you search him, he has eaten your AC.
08:14He says, I am very hot inside.
08:16Have you eaten a goat?
08:18No.
08:19No.
08:19No.
08:20You will break my legs.
08:22What will you do?
08:23Okay, give me the money. I will go.
08:25Why should I give you the money?
08:26Keep quiet.
08:26Let's go to the audience.
08:27Let's go to the audience.
08:28Who will go to the audience?
08:30Hello, brother.
08:31Irza.
08:32Irza.
08:33Okay, it's you. Okay.
08:35Okay, you guys wait here.
08:37We have to talk to the audience.
08:38I have an announcement to make.
08:39Those who want to get married, don't tie my legs.
08:43Okay.
08:45You have eaten our entire segment.
08:48Let's go to the audience.
08:49Let's go to the audience.
08:50Wow.
08:51Hello, everyone.
08:52Hello.
08:53How are you all?
08:53We are fine, thank you.
08:55My name is Heena Basit.
08:56And I want to sing a song for you.
08:58Wow.
09:00Wow.
09:01Think about it.
09:08Why don't you stop yourself?
09:15When you leave after getting up.
09:27When you leave after getting up.
09:37I swear on you, my love.
09:46Listen to me.
09:55Don't be stubborn today.
10:01Wow.
10:04We will die.
10:08We will be ruined.
10:12Don't say such things.
10:20Don't be stubborn today.
10:28Don't be stubborn today.
10:34Wow.
10:36She is amazing.
10:37She is amazing.
10:39You sang very well.
10:40Do you take training to sing?
10:42What do you do?
10:43I have learnt it.
10:45Okay.
10:46Properly.
10:46Okay.
10:47And yes.
10:48And I am a beautician too.
10:50Okay.
10:51So you have learnt singing properly.
10:53We know that too.
10:54You sang very well.
10:56You know, he told me that he doesn't want to go.
11:01Why are you crying?
11:02Yes.
11:03He is in a bad mood.
11:05He is in a bad mood.
11:06He thinks that he is a widow.
11:08Can I get your teacher's number?
11:10Why?
11:11I want to give it to Amanat.
11:15Okay, next.
11:16Hello.
11:17Hello.
11:18My name is Hira Jamshed.
11:19Okay.
11:20My question is to Mr. Saleem.
11:22Okay.
11:23Mr. Saleem, when you get a medical test done
11:25you take a little blood for that.
11:27After that, how many bottles of blood do you take?
11:30That much.
11:32After giving the test, I have a problem.
11:35Yes.
11:35I have taken a lot of blood for that.
11:38Dad, I know that blood is very precious to you.
11:41Yes.
11:41But how much blood will you take?
11:44I have taken 25 mosquitoes on my head.
11:47I have said that he thinks that I can sing.
11:55Okay, with us today
11:57we have Mohammad Hassan and Abdul Rehman.
12:00Wow.
12:00You are identical twins.
12:02You sing together.
12:03You sing the same song.
12:05You take the same payment.
12:06Wow.
12:06And you sing very well.
12:08Wow.
12:08Come, let's listen to a song from them.
12:09Wow.
12:15Wow.
12:16Wow.
12:18Very good.
12:19Very good.
12:20Very good.
12:20Yes, do it.
12:21Yes, do it.
12:22Yes, do it.
12:26Listen to me.
12:27What are you doing?
12:28I am a little fat.
12:29Do it.
12:29Listen to me.
12:31Today's show was bad.
12:32What are you doing?
12:33In the next show..
12:33Oh, no.
12:34We will do a lot of work.
12:36Come on.

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