The Diamond Peddlers (1976)
Il vangelo secondo Simone e Matteo (original title)
1h 25min | Comedy, Drama | 29 January 1976 (Italy)
Bumbling crooks Butch and Toby pose as priests in order to elude being arrested by the authorities in Africa. Butch and Toby deliver a statue of the Virgin Mary from Africa to Amsterdam. Unbeknownst to the clueless duo, they're really smuggling diamonds. A group of equally inept mobsters give chase.
Director: Giuliano Carnimeo
Writers: Pierre-Louis Alberti (story), Giuliano Carnimeo (story)
Stars: Antonio Cantafora, Paul L. Smith, Dominic Barto
Il vangelo secondo Simone e Matteo (original title)
1h 25min | Comedy, Drama | 29 January 1976 (Italy)
Bumbling crooks Butch and Toby pose as priests in order to elude being arrested by the authorities in Africa. Butch and Toby deliver a statue of the Virgin Mary from Africa to Amsterdam. Unbeknownst to the clueless duo, they're really smuggling diamonds. A group of equally inept mobsters give chase.
Director: Giuliano Carnimeo
Writers: Pierre-Louis Alberti (story), Giuliano Carnimeo (story)
Stars: Antonio Cantafora, Paul L. Smith, Dominic Barto
Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Come in. Is there something else I can show you?
00:04Close that door.
00:05Right.
00:05We'll close it.
00:06Right.
00:15Put it home.
00:15No.
00:24Now the first thing we need is a fire to get our arms out of these bracelets.
00:27Right.
00:27And a bunch of clothes that'll fit us.
00:29A little bit of cash money or else it's a bullet hole.
00:32Matter of fact, give the bullet hole now.
00:34Get going.
00:37I'll do whatever you want.
00:38You two over there, no funny tricks, huh?
00:41We're bloodthirsty tigers.
00:42We got a million bullets and we don't like preaching our way.
00:47There's a saw in the rear of the store.
00:49Go get it.
00:50And I can manage to find some clothes for your three friends over there.
00:55But you, look how big you are.
00:5744 is the largest size I've got.
00:59I'll get it.
01:14Well, look at this.
01:15Don't you think that once I've got all this holy cloth on me,
01:17my sins will be forgiven?
01:19That'll come in pretty handy, I'll tell you.
01:21Almost a sin.
01:23What did you say?
01:24Nothing, nothing. Just praying for you.
01:26Marvellous. Fine. Go right ahead.
02:29Hmm. Well, you shouldn't have done that, friend.
02:33You want I should give him the bullet hole, boss?
02:34You can shove the bullet holes up your...
02:44That's something else you shouldn't have done, friend.
02:49Bullet hole now.
02:50Please forget your bullet holes.
02:51And I'll bullet hole you.
02:52You shouldn't have done that, my fine friend.
02:56The boss is down.