Café Express (1980)
100 min | Comedy, Drama | 16 February 1980 (Italy)
An Italian laborer foils anyone who tries to stop him from selling espresso on the Milan-to-Naples train.
Director: Nanni Loy
Writers: Elvio Porta (story), Nanni Loy (story)
Stars: Nino Manfredi, Adolfo Celi, Vittorio Caprioli
100 min | Comedy, Drama | 16 February 1980 (Italy)
An Italian laborer foils anyone who tries to stop him from selling espresso on the Milan-to-Naples train.
Director: Nanni Loy
Writers: Elvio Porta (story), Nanni Loy (story)
Stars: Nino Manfredi, Adolfo Celi, Vittorio Caprioli
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:01:00Oh
00:01:20What are you sure it's for me that's what they said
00:01:24And when's it coming in let's see it should be arriving any minute now
00:01:30I
00:01:43So far so good, huh
00:01:48From the head office Ministry of Transportation Rome
00:01:52Chief conductor Giuseppe sanguineo follow the Lacania you see it's addressed to you personally so I see
00:01:57I
00:01:59Identify and hold in custody for railway police when we kill you have a nano
00:02:03Do you involve the Lacania an express train number 517?
00:02:10arriving Napoli
00:02:12Gino
00:02:13Gastro, but the canyon. Oh, Costa La Mare
00:02:16Doris del Grieco Salerno and Pompeii by the state railway authorities for vending without a license
00:02:24Whoever heard of this up on yano guy
00:02:27What's that
00:02:28What do you think it is? It's the train that's arriving now the 517 Express. Let's go get moving
00:02:34But the teletype is still going we should wait till it's finished. What if they're sending more information?
00:02:39I'll still be waiting there for you to read later on but the train is here now
00:02:46Now look relax will you give me a chance to switch on the main yard lights?
00:02:57Look at that your main yard lights wouldn't light up a graveyard. We're not here to thread a needle army
00:03:02No, we're not. We just have to nab a guy coming from Naples. Come on. Give us a hand
00:03:07Don't just stand there. Come on Tony media over there. Yes
00:03:11What does the man look like anyway?
00:03:14We've never seen him. Oh, well, then it'll be easy. We'll know which one to look for
00:03:19Besides how many people do you know who come all the way from Naples get out here and take the next train back?
00:03:25We know all the regular commuters so we can forget about that. The first stranger we see is sure to be our man
00:03:31Yeah, yeah, there's nothing to it. What if we don't catch him?
00:03:54Ah
00:04:07Good evening. Good evening. Let her cover up
00:04:22Hey
00:04:25Nothing
00:04:26Then he couldn't have got off here. We couldn't have missed him
00:04:30Now, what do we do? It's better this way. Anyhow, we have nothing to worry about one my end
00:04:35I told you everything would go smoothly, but you wouldn't be what you look over there
00:04:40Oh
00:04:51Look at the way she wags her tail. She's got a wiggle on her like an earthquake. I don't go like that
00:04:57No, what do you call it? I call that paradise two hot packs like that. I'd buy Chester all I need to cure my cold
00:05:03It's not my purpose
00:05:05Hey laugh a little it's good for what else
00:05:10That wasn't what I call depressing laugh a little but it depresses him
00:05:40I
00:06:10I
00:06:40Are you coming or not?
00:06:54You you're sure to be a lot later before the night's over anything special nothing at all good night then
00:07:00I'll be glad to get in bed tonight. Do you mind if I have another swig or two take it along?
00:07:05It's almost empty. Anyway, good. Yeah. Yeah here I am. What are you waiting for?
00:07:09I was waiting for you. You're ready
00:07:40You
00:07:42You
00:08:04Here comes McAlee
00:08:06Here comes McAlee to provide you with all the comforts black coffee hot milk and cappuccino
00:08:17Don't deny yourself one of life's little pleasures after all we're here today and gone tomorrow. It's too late. Is it hot?
00:08:24That it is cuz when my son is soppy brings it
00:08:26He always puts him in a sort of locket near the watch him. I'll call it there
00:08:29That's right beside the heat pumps. Then we have two black coffees through blacks
00:08:37Now, where do you go must have heard his films maybe so what do you say I didn't see a thing your ticket, please
00:08:49Thank you
00:08:54Now there's two black coffees that 600
00:08:56Ah
00:09:05You're peddling a lot of license, huh?
00:09:08No, this is our new official uniform. It's the latest Parisian fashion
00:09:12We changed to white in the summertime. Here comes McAlee. Here comes McAlee to provide you with all the comforts
00:09:19That
00:09:25Coffee hot milk and cappuccino people sell your coffee without waking up everyone in the train
00:09:29I do wake you up you drink your coffee in your sleep. You're liable to choke to death. I'd like to have some coffee good
00:09:35The sugar is already
00:09:38300 you go on like that all night long. You give me a headache already
00:09:42Good sign because at least you got ahead give it to me
00:09:45What no, you see we're about to come to an old switch and if you're not ready for it
00:09:50You spill your coffee all over yourself. How do you manage to know that?
00:09:53First the train goes to D D D D down which tells you the switch is coming up and when it goes to dad
00:09:59I don't there's a great big son in a tremendous joke
00:10:05What did I tell you no wait a minute it's not over with yet
00:10:12I'll put your cup here for you
00:10:34Coffee cappuccino
00:10:42Oh
00:10:45What's about coffee sister, yes, thank you, but please try to be quiet quiet coffee
00:11:02Are the orphans they're the Lord's children
00:11:06Oh
00:11:08Friends
00:11:10Are you taking them to the seashore to the mountains they're very lucky
00:11:15My son's never been to a summer camp, but your son's not an orphan. Of course. That's the trouble
00:11:21How much is it?
00:11:22300 is fine 400 even better. Whatever you wish
00:11:26There you are. Thank you very much. May God bless your soul. Don't I get me change?
00:11:31I you wanted it. Oh, I guess I misunderstood. I'm sorry
00:11:42You'll have to be patient with me because with only one hand have you been disabled from birth disabled I
00:11:51You mean the wooden arm I'll tell you how it happened
00:11:56One night outside castle of a lawyer during a terrible storm two little kids were trapped in a blazing fire
00:12:03There was the howling wind and the roaring the fire, but I still heard those kids and I left right into the middle of the flames
00:12:10They told me when I woke up in the hospital that I got the two little ones safely out of the fire
00:12:14But the fire got my arm
00:12:16You sure you still want your change?
00:12:26Excuse me, you ought to know where are we?
00:12:29That was took yada. We went through but it's this blackest pitch. How can you be sure? I'm like a cat in the dark
00:12:34I just know period when do we get to a youngster? It's the next one. Do you want a coffee call?
00:12:39Oh, what that way? You know where to get off. I'll bring you a cup of coffee
00:12:42I'm not getting off the train there. That's where I expect someone else to get on
00:12:45What's your worth having a call anyway for 200?
00:12:48Yeah, you can have a cup of coffee. I'll bring you a cup of coffee
00:12:51That's where I expect someone else to get on what's your worth having a call anyway for 200
00:12:56No, no, thanks. I'll know when we're there
00:12:59That coffee hot milk cappuccino want some coffee, sir, and I asked inside first the five of them. All right, I will with pleasure
00:13:06Black coffee hot milk and cappuccino. How much is the coffee? You can have the special group rate only 200 years. Good. Good
00:13:13Let me help you. Thank you, sir
00:13:19How many coffees one and fill the cup is in your a lot of sugar
00:13:28And
00:13:30Everyone sir a little one has his own supply is only quiet when he's nursing very cute kid. What's his name?
00:13:37Peppino
00:13:39Peppino
00:13:41Peppino
00:13:43Peppino
00:13:45Peppino
00:13:47Peppino
00:13:49Peppino
00:13:51Peppino
00:13:53Peppino
00:13:55Peppino
00:13:57Peppino
00:14:00Has he done his military service yet?
00:14:19Exactly
00:14:29Here
00:14:35That's in my darling hurry, will you
00:14:39Look at this. I get a surprise at every station
00:14:42Easy enough for them
00:14:43They just send me telegrams and think it solves everything as if the one there was only one man on the train chief
00:14:48Inspector will board 718 express to aid investigation Shannon inspector a chief inspector. Well, so what I know you don't give a damn
00:14:56You couldn't care less but what's there to investigate? There's no McHale or happen. You know, I'm the train
00:15:01They're always trying to scare the hell out of you
00:15:04Chief, what is it? Why don't you call Rome right away and tell them not to send the inspector?
00:15:10Oh sure. You're so clever. You really think that anyone in Rome is awake and waiting for a phone call at this hour
00:15:15Okay. Okay. There's no need to have a heart attack over it
00:15:19Hey, it's gonna be you want a slug of it?
00:15:22Good for your cold. Are you trying to make me sick?
00:15:24You know, I can't drink besides what made me come to work tonight. Anyhow when I was sitting pretty on sick leave
00:15:30Are you kidding? You can never sit pretty you're ugly. You're impulsive. You're a fire head and what's worse?
00:15:37You're sober and if you're sick, it's because you deserve it
00:15:46Doctor doctor over here
00:15:51Oh
00:16:08But you said a first-class car it was but it's been dungarees
00:16:21You
00:16:51You
00:17:21You
00:17:36Here the latest scientific discovery, it's not even on the market yet
00:17:42What do you want me to do with this is poison?
00:17:44No, that bottle is not the original one. The hospital is supplied with everything in bulk. Will this cure him?
00:17:50No, no, it won't cure it. What's it for?
00:17:54Mickey let's be honest. Now. This is one case in which drugs can't do very much good
00:17:59What your son needs is to have an operation and the sooner the better
00:18:03You mean it's as serious as that. No, it's not serious. But if we wait
00:18:08The boy will be handicapped for the rest of his life. What's wrong with his hands?
00:18:12I thought the trouble was with his lungs. No
00:18:15He was born with a minor physical defect
00:18:17Which only an operation a great deal depends on how old your son is. What's his name? That's it
00:18:22No, he's 14 years old
00:18:23You bring him to the hospital in Naples and we'll operate on him and get it over and he'll take care of him when he
00:18:28Gets out. That's why he's in boarding school because it doesn't have a mother
00:18:32Will you have a look at this?
00:18:39It's still swollen if I were you I'd bathe it in alcohol have you got any no
00:18:47I
00:19:01By the way, how's your money situation? They're not too bad. I have close to 200,000 there
00:19:08That's chicken feet
00:19:10But you said you would do the operation for nothing
00:19:13The operation sure, yeah, but you're not covered by health insurance and medicine
00:19:17Can you afford it? Sure the x-rays plus all the other tests. Can you afford that?
00:19:21I have 200,000 everybody enough
00:19:23No with only two hundred thousand a year
00:19:25You'll be lucky if you can bribe the hospital attendant into finding a bed for you. Is that what you call lucky?
00:19:30Even then I mean only as a personal favor. No the whole business ought to come to around
00:19:36No, what it ought to come to is dousing you with a can of gas and setting a match the whole business
00:19:40No, wait, I only drive an ambulance you wanted medicine I stole it for you. What more do you want from me?
00:19:47Sure, you've got a lot to be upset about but you don't have to take it out on me
00:19:52Why are you shouting cuz I'm angry that's all why are you angry with me?
00:19:56I never said I was angry with you today
00:19:58Then who are you angry with the only one I'm angry with is me and when I got a right to be angry with me
00:20:04I
00:20:12Don't want me to
00:20:19Put 3,000 there'd be enough
00:20:21What the pills that you brought no, no, it's okay. I didn't pay for them. Never mind that you've got kids to feed as well
00:20:27Not take it. All right. Let's say we split it two ways that okay with you
00:20:34You
00:20:39Want some coffee you gave me one already
00:21:04I'll take two cups. You don't have to wait. I'm booked right now, but I'll come back
00:21:14Excuse me course come in. Thank you
00:21:17I
00:21:29Was just what I needed a cup of cappuccino
00:21:32Sorry, this one has been reserved for the UN diplomat. What do you mean? You win?
00:21:36When and you same thing?
00:21:38Anyway, he was sent to hell both quick victims of assault. He told me that he drives a hearse for the national undertakers
00:21:44What do you think the UN sends to help earthquake victims in the south, huh?
00:21:49Excellency Agropoli is five minutes. Here's your cappuccino
00:21:53You want your bill for this week? You had four couple genus booked in advance and one that wasn't you may tip whatever you like
00:21:59Wait a minute. You have to book your coffee in advance. No only coffee with a wake-up call. I wake up call
00:22:05That's why I never sleep because I'm scared. I won't wake up. Could you wake me with a coffee?
00:22:10Before we get to Toriano inside
00:22:13Don't mention it directly. Oh, you'll excuse me, but you will wake me I can count on you
00:22:20You're not gonna forget about it. Are you?
00:22:22That's my Judy a little worried, you know, because if I'm not up in time, I miss the appointment
00:22:26I have a for a job interview. I don't really know if you've noticed that I have a slight physical defect
00:22:32Oh
00:22:34Well in the way I look oh no, I would never have noticed
00:22:42So what I suppose you are a bit cross-eyed some people think it's charming and the girls don't exactly fall over me though
00:22:51Don't worry because you're still a very young man. Yeah, I guess so
00:22:57Only the police wouldn't take me on the force
00:23:03But
00:23:05It's not as bad as all that there are other jobs to be had oh, yeah sure, but that was the one I wanted
00:23:22There once was a time when I was quite a pianist you were
00:23:27One night while I was giving an opening a concert on a bazaar the most terrible thunderstorm
00:23:32It was the howling wind and the roaring of the thunder and while I was playing the introduction to the main theme of the symphony
00:23:39The wind slammed down the piano into my fingers
00:23:44You don't mean it
00:23:46You know my boy you can't have everything you want in this life
00:23:49We still go on living the best we can in spite of it
00:23:55In spite of it I told you I'd be back
00:24:02With straws, this is extra
00:24:11Are you going to come down to my level or shall I come up to yours?
00:24:32I
00:24:51Provide you with all the comforts black coffee hot milk and cappuccino
00:24:57Coffee is the best friend a man ever had keeps you wide awake helps you to avoid trouble and gives you the strength to live
00:25:03to a ripe old age
00:25:09Want some coffee
00:25:10That makes me sick
00:25:13Maybe you're not. Well, you do look a bit greener on the goose. Yeah, I know I
00:25:18Suffer from claustrophobia when you hold up inside there with all the windows closed and not a breath of air
00:25:24It feels like you're in jail, eh, no, don't say that. I really will vomit
00:25:28Would you like me to give you a pill to settle your stomach? No, thank you
00:25:32I always keep a couple on me because there are some nights when this train
00:25:36Makes me sick to my stomach. You have to be patient. Anyway, if it gets any worse, you give me a call
00:25:41Ah, I've always said nothing cements a friendship like a little vomit. That's where you beat it
00:25:48Listen you you wise up or else let go of that arm if you know, what's good for you
00:25:53What if I don't feel like letting go if you don't you'll get slivers in your hand that arm is made out of wood
00:26:00You're gonna quit ringing that Bell if they're sleeping I want him to stay sleeping
00:26:05How am I gonna sell the coffee sell it somewhere else?
00:26:09Don't ring the bell. I suppose you're gonna make up for all the money that I'm losing
00:26:16Watch it or I'll break the other arm for you. There's coming. Where are you going? Where are you going? Forget it?
00:26:21There's no time for that
00:26:25Consider yourself lucky. Yeah, but just try to ring that Bell again. Just try it
00:26:32Bring it just once more you'll see
00:26:34Excuse me, son. Do you know whether this train stops in Pompeii or will it go straight through?
00:26:39Yeah, I don't have me that loud. What you say to come
00:26:43Well, now that's a good one young man, you know any other amusing stories
00:26:52Oh
00:27:04Good evening dad. What are you doing?
00:27:13Devil you're doing on the train
00:27:15I
00:27:20You gonna answer me can see look I put your thermos bottles in the locker Papa and then I jumped in the train that pulled
00:27:27out
00:27:29You mean they let you out on vacation I don't like school anymore so I ran away
00:27:36My god, will you listen to him after I went to all that trouble to get them to take you
00:27:41Besides you think you'd be glad to go to school where they feed you three square meals a day
00:27:44That's not enough for me. How the hell often do you have to eat Papa? That wasn't a real school
00:27:49It was an orphan school and I was the only orphan in the school. His father was alive
00:27:53Oh, you'd rather I were dead. Is that what you mean? Oh, I think maybe we should have a long talk
00:28:00All right
00:28:02You
00:28:09Wanna begin just a minute. I don't want to cut myself
00:28:13What do you have to shave anyhow you don't have a beard yet no one believes that when I say I'm 14
00:28:19But why do you want to make it grow faster?
00:28:21Because I want to start working. Hmm so you can end up like me. I
00:28:26Don't see why you're passing up such a good chance to go to a school with boys your own age to study to play
00:28:31football
00:28:32I'm not even allowed to play ball because I got asthma and I can't breathe and I can't take Jim because of it and they
00:28:37Don't let me read either
00:28:39Everyone calls me little old creep. So why should I stay there?
00:28:49I have a real father. I want to stay with you
00:28:57You're all alone too I even began to learn how to cook
00:29:01I
00:29:11Watch that shaving cream off your face. Hey, thank you. Do look kind of creepy that way
00:29:24Thank you son as far as the pension goes in just a minute son, I won't be long
00:29:27It's calculated on the final month's salary. So I'm not about to let anything screw me out of my automatic pay increase
00:29:33I just figured on 365 divided by 4 plus 221. That's the additional compensation for night
00:29:39Well, yeah, so you see it works out the more than you counted on. I'd have to have a computer to work
00:29:45So someone like me Kelly Albaniano could screw it all up for me because of him I'd lose
00:29:50422 Leary a day every day for the rest of my life. I can strangle that son of a bitch
00:29:57Plus all the vacation I have coming
00:30:01Just a minute son, there's a 2.85 seniority bonus to consider that's nothing to sneeze at either
00:30:07Plus the 3.25 hardship bonus. Hey, look, there's no water. How come there's no water when you add it all up
00:30:14When you add the whole thing up, it's why doesn't this thing work?
00:30:18There we are. I almost forgot. I haven't used up last year's vacation with all these added benefits
00:30:23I'm liable to be risking what I've worked hard for all these years down the drain all at once
00:30:29Now the damn thing won't stop it's too much. How can a man live under such tension?
00:30:42Papa they're gone now
00:30:45When a cold potato sandwich son, no, I'm sick of cold potatoes, but you must be hungry
00:30:50So we got to eat in school, let me work the train. Oh young man
00:30:53We have a long way to go and I want you to lie down and sleep
00:30:55But I can help carry the basket around but just in a little boy and little boys can't go without sleep. Wait till tomorrow
00:31:09Run along
00:31:20Oh
00:31:46Yeah
00:31:51That
00:31:54Coffee hot milk. Well, what if we hear coffee cappuccino? Why not take the pause that refreshes?
00:32:00To black coffees. Yes, sir
00:32:04Who are you pouring it for?
00:32:06Wasn't it for you? No, I'm treating you. Is that better? That's better. Thanks
00:32:11It's looking at but only if you drink it in the corridor while you keep watch
00:32:14Outside the compartment keep watch for what keep watch in case anyone comes along
00:32:23But it's only four minutes to party pioneer where the workmen get on
00:32:27What can you do in only four minutes a lot of you wouldn't waste our time?
00:32:31It's better not to rush a thing like that
00:32:32You should take time to enjoy it when those what we get on the train that knows around everywhere
00:32:37How am I gonna keep him away from?
00:32:39Now look at me a man
00:32:41Oh
00:32:43It is time for intermission
00:32:46Please make me lose customers. I could have sold six or seven cappuccinos
00:32:53Not to mention the coffee I could have sold five or six
00:32:57It's better not to say I never was able to say no to such tender
00:33:11I
00:33:17Guess you
00:33:19What is it? Will you do me a favor? Well, yes, of course when you call the conductor
00:33:25Me I can't leave the girls alone in the compartment. What's the trouble those two next door?
00:33:31Do you have any idea what they're doing?
00:33:34What are they doing? Go take a look. I
00:33:37I
00:33:39Don't see anything at all the curtains are closed
00:33:42But if you stand right here on your tiptoes and look through the slit, you'll see everything
00:33:49But if you don't stand there on your tiptoes and you don't look through the slip then you won't see anything
00:33:53Yes, but what if some poor innocent soul were to walk in there? That's true
00:33:58Now I think I know what to do. Why don't you say a prayer for the souls of those two lost sinners?
00:34:02I'll take care of the rest. I'll keep watch outside the door and see that no one goes inside. Bless you
00:34:08Although it's gonna be bad for sales
00:34:11What if I agreed to buy milk for all the girls tomorrow morning one good deed deserves?
00:34:15I
00:34:26Always send us out at night and always in a hurry. They don't even give us time for a cup of coffee
00:34:31That's true Marisha low, but we're on duty and duty comes first
00:34:38Why did you all get off let's go everyone back on board give them the signal let's go
00:34:46I
00:35:07Looks like everyone's still asleep
00:35:10You
00:35:12Morning McKinley, you didn't work too hard. I'll listen to Kaylee the only ones who don't work hard these days at the priests
00:35:19What do you mean? You wouldn't be God did working too hard. Let me sit down in there. I don't know that one's out
00:35:25Since when the diplomats travel in second class for their relatives. There's a woman in there stretched out on the same morning
00:35:31What's wrong with her? She vomited everywhere before the seat. It's really revolting. Why is she pregnant? No, not you
00:35:38Well, I don't think so. No, I better warn her that you insist on coming. No, no, no, don't bother
00:35:43That's that's what it's like in there. I'll find somewhere else. You want me to bring you your coffee?
00:35:47Yeah, what class will you be in?
00:35:49the working class
00:35:55Sorry you two in there, but your time is up. Yeah, I've got work to do now
00:36:00Look, if I wait much longer, I'll have to apply for a license to operate a brothel
00:36:09You know if you're running in time tonight, how should I know?
00:36:12McKaylee what?
00:36:14Come and give me a hand. Well, yeah, I can't do it. Oh do what I
00:36:18Can't wash myself alone and I'm covered with grease. I should of course
00:36:22Give me
00:36:24You all the soap while I stand on the water, but
00:36:29Why don't we try it the other way around you hold the soap and I'll see
00:36:38I
00:36:44Happen to your little finger got mangled by a machine down at the factory. I hope they gave you a proper compensation
00:36:50Oh, no, I would have had to lose two fingers for that and you've lost just the one I call that plane unlucky
00:36:56And how much did you get for your left? Hey nothing must be due for something sure
00:37:02But that doesn't mean I get it. Oh, well, did you make out an application?
00:37:05I've been making out applications for years and I'm still waiting
00:37:09Can't they get a move on they don't want to I won't cough up until I'm dead
00:37:19Once there, yes, sir
00:37:29Good
00:37:31Why so hard to make any money long overnight trip I get into the finished half of it myself so I drink all the profits
00:37:49One cup of your best coffee and coffee coming up much of these sandwiches 1200
00:37:55Too much
00:37:57Listen could I ask you to heat this milk a little for my baby son pass it over. Thank you. Okay, I really need this
00:38:05I'll put some steam through it
00:38:08And would you do this one as well? Hey little baby's got a thirst. I'm going all the way to Germany. Thank you
00:38:17I
00:38:21Mind if I take one? Yeah help yourself like sugar
00:38:29How many babies you've got
00:38:36I'll put it in his milk later. We got a long way to go grateful to you. Thanks
00:38:46Very
00:38:49Good his name's Michele Abagnano
00:38:52He's a small-time crook who rides the train selling coffee without a license doing it for years
00:38:56Yeah, well, why do those jerks sitting on their asses in Rome suddenly tell us to jump on him tonight?
00:39:02Come on I'll buy y'all a drink we got to wait for the connection anyway, thanks. I'll have a grapino
00:39:08You must have a grapino scotty. I mean, I don't think alcoholic. It's dangerous to make you a cop
00:39:13Okay, then I'll get you a double
00:39:16in a tall black
00:39:25I want to find out something
00:39:46I saw what like what's the point of taking this? What's the matter with you?
00:40:00You work hard enough for this stuff you gotta be careful keep your voice
00:40:04You never know
00:40:13Okay, that's all I'll share it up to for the bus and
00:40:21To
00:40:23For you to the bus
00:40:26gets two and
00:40:28the same
00:40:29for you
00:40:31the bus
00:40:32Gets two and the boys get two as well. You're sure that's right on my honor
00:40:41Dropping your guts later on when we're working why not take a crap now? I can't I'm not scared just at the moment
00:41:03I
00:41:08Thanks a lot
00:41:10Can I have my hand back now mind if I ask you a question go ahead tell me friend. Are you Catholic?
00:41:16No, no. No. No, I am unemployed
00:41:18Oh, it pains me to hear that you don't believe in him because the Heavenly Father has arranged no less than two miracles
00:41:24especially for you
00:41:26No kidding. Our father sees everything and now it seems he is aware that you are a bit short of dope
00:41:33Do you mean to say that it's taken him 40 years to notice that there's nothing in the infinity of eternity?
00:41:38Just clear something
00:41:40What does God ask in return from?
00:41:45Well, maybe some information
00:41:48For instance when you sell coffee
00:41:50You might look accidentally
00:41:53To see whether your clients wallets a bit underfed or nicely forcey and then you tell me and then you'll accidentally
00:42:01See that he loses not accident. That's beautiful
00:42:04So where's the heavenly miracle? Oh, well, if you go ahead God in his infinite mercy would happily repay your great zeal to the tomb
00:42:12Of 20,000 the night and so I become a thief by the grace of God
00:42:18Listen to me
00:42:20You go back up to heaven and tell God that you couldn't reach me. Wait a minute. You've forgotten the second miracle
00:42:26That's okay. It's like the first I don't mind. No, it's a little bit different
00:42:31The Lord sent me to warn you that as things stand now, you can soon run into some bad luck
00:42:35You know the kind of thing it starts with a broken toe then a broken neck
00:42:39Then you go into a hospital or the mortuary look serious
00:42:44And who is God's chosen instrument will help your little look into the future come true. Do you dad do I'm a friend?
00:42:50He's bad. Who is he?
00:42:53That's me
00:42:55Seems like God sent the Archangel Gabriel, eh, you got it. Ah, well
00:43:03Yeah that case
00:43:05In the circumstances, we better discuss the whole thing again. I hoped you'd say that
00:43:10But not here. I
00:43:13Don't want us to be over. Where should we go?
00:43:17Evening gentlemen, I've got two lovely surprises for you
00:43:21Come in Gabriel
00:43:23No, no, we'll come back. Perhaps we can talk then
00:43:26Yeah
00:43:29We'll find you don't worry
00:43:32Now, where are these two surprise two cups of best coffee? How did you know that we wanted coffee?
00:43:37I'm in direct contact with the Archangel Gabriel person
00:43:48Well, I see by your ribbons that you had some years in Russia were you there as well
00:43:53Yes, this is my souvenir of Russia frostbite
00:43:57War is a terrible thing. Sometimes it's even worse than peace. Yes, where did you serve?
00:44:03I served all over the place. Finally, I ended up in
00:44:09One day I was walking by the river when I found this guy buried in snow up to his neck
00:44:14The wind was terrible. The snow was coming down. I couldn't walk away and I gave him my overcoat
00:44:19I hope I would have done the same. I'm sorry. I don't have any change
00:44:22No, wait
00:44:24Take some extra sugar in case you'd like it sweet on the house. No change. That's a problem
00:44:30See, can I bring it back to you later on forget it? That's okay. I hope I would have done the same too
00:44:38God bless you sir
00:44:41Coffee hot fresh coffee
00:44:43Morning Pasquale. Hello Mckay. What's up two cups. Coming up. You want it good and hot eh? Thank you how much?
00:44:52Got any more boys?
00:44:54Yeah
00:44:56That's all right. Take it easy. No hurry
00:44:59How many packs do you want? Why not do nicely one shiny new pack eh? Let's see. Coffee's getting so expensive
00:45:07600. We're all square then
00:45:10Infect the whole goddamn train with your cold
00:45:13the pants
00:45:19Tickets please
00:45:31It's occupied your tickets please sir. Yes. Okay. Wait a minute
00:45:36I think it's gentlemen. You got it. I'm trying to find it. Can't you punch it later on? I'm sorry. I can't
00:45:44tickets, please
00:45:46Get your tickets ready
00:45:51Thank you your tickets, please come on take it take it, please
00:45:57I
00:46:01Always forget where I put it. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you
00:46:11Well, have you checked the whole train
00:46:14Nothing the minister can send the whole army of inspectors. They won't find any sign of an unlicensed coffee center
00:46:21Certainly sir. Well, he's not on board. That's for sure
00:46:24Yeah, that means you won't lose your pension laugh all you want to but you know what it comes to it's a lot of money
00:46:30Hey, listen, Pasquale. You got one of those
00:46:32One of those new electronic gadgets a calc a calculator one of those things that you had up
00:46:37I might have the odd one tucked away somewhere great
00:46:47No, I'm afraid that they're all sold
00:46:50Maybe you'll be lucky in next trip, but have some of our coffee. No, not you when you're cold
00:46:55Do you want the rest of us to catch it?
00:46:59That's very good
00:47:01Very refreshing. Thanks. I'll be seeing you later. It's always a pleasure to see anything you want apply
00:47:10Who the hell sold you that coffee
00:47:20I
00:47:31See you again tomorrow
00:47:39Stopping here
00:48:19Oh
00:48:42You should try to control those urges especially when you're on furlough
00:48:49You
00:48:55Hot milk coffee get your cappuccino second sitting how much is a cappuccino for
00:49:02Got anything a bit less expensive. What about a cappuccino without coffee?
00:49:06How can you have a cappuccino without coffee easy take a neat milk?
00:49:09All right, a cappuccino without coffee coming right up
00:49:19Nothing well, this is the last compartment
00:49:49I
00:50:19I
00:50:34Come quick
00:50:42What if the priest had woken up it's no princess old you narrow the bigger
00:50:46He's the best common in Naples under his skirt, he's about as holy as we are
00:51:07Papa
00:51:09These three want to take a whole thermos from you and the nice little glass of milk for our friendly little messenger
00:51:17Okay, but come out here in the corridor you can drink it out. Yeah. No, no
00:51:20No, I don't think it's very good manners to accept the drink from a friend and then take it away
00:51:24So I'd stay here stay. No. No, that's no good. We don't like the boy to stay with us, too
00:51:30You get the message. Uh-huh
00:51:32That's how it is. I suppose there's not a lot I can do about it
00:51:35Yeah, you see with a little compromise you can always reach an agreement, especially when you got him by the balls
00:51:42Yes, sir. Can I have a word? Yes
00:51:46Name is Mikaela, but yeah, how do you do? They call us good you mean?
00:51:50What can I do for you gentlemen? I don't think I heard correctly. What did you say your name is?
00:51:55Mikaela, but yeah, no, you admit it just like that. What else do you expect me to do? Oh, Mary mother of God chief
00:52:04The next car there's a compartment with two policemen now you go and sit with them for a while
00:52:08They're friends of mine off you go. All right. Now, can you show me your ticket? No, I can't
00:52:12How about a travel warrant? I don't have a travel warrant either
00:52:16And I'll have to make an official report because selling coffee unlicensed is a very serious offense
00:52:21Oh that but thieving's a whole lot worse. What do you mean?
00:52:30Had a lot of practice right you don't like my style, huh?
00:52:34Oh, I mean you ought to try it with just one hand
00:52:36Then you'd see what it's like having to make a living with one hand instead of two did some guy make a fool of you
00:52:43His hands as good as mine, he's bullshitting you
00:52:48Is that a fact
00:52:51Calm down. No, let's do a test
00:52:56Suppose I stick this knife into it
00:53:01And we'll all see what it's made of
00:53:09Stab me then
00:53:12Oh
00:53:43No, it's not where's my knife wait, which way did he go down the court? Thanks
00:53:51Hey lady. Did you see a guy carrying a basket? Oh
00:54:04You see that knife anywhere
00:54:06Don't push me too hard. Hey, I don't want to go to jail
00:54:10I'm arrested and get sent to jail. My son could finish up like us, too
00:54:14I don't want that to happen and I do a lot to stop it. I'm not going to jail you get the message
00:54:23Hey
00:54:26Pissing his coffee, huh? You hear me? I'll piss right in your coffee
00:54:39Somebody do anything about
00:55:00Where is he? I caught him. I actually caught him wonderful. He got away. I lost him again
00:55:06I
00:55:09Want him
00:55:19Goddamn drivers gone on strike again. Why don't we stop what's happened?
00:55:36I
00:55:55Guess the driver just felt like a rest
00:56:06Hey
00:56:12Look shut the door quick
00:56:23Drive out of this I warned him
00:56:36Oh
00:56:51Hey you
00:56:54Yes, you
00:56:58Yes, I mean you
00:57:01We've got to get the track cleared
00:57:06Funny
00:57:10Yeah, okay
00:57:14That's all I've got
00:57:17And
00:57:30Over
00:57:32Get all this stuff off the track move those barrels away. Hey my barrels my barrels
00:57:39Okay, that's it. Now. We're running late Rosalina. We're ready to move on. Let's get going. I want my wife
00:57:47You
00:57:50What's the difference get on the train we're ready to go. Okay. Thanks a lot. Don't need to thank me
00:57:56In fact, thank you for all your help chief. I can't find him. I know that Micaela. Yeah, but y'all know he's disappeared
00:58:03Vanished in the thin air. No sign of it. How could you be such an idiot?
00:58:06You are standing right beside him and he got away
00:58:16You
00:58:34Excuse me
00:58:46You
00:58:51Sleeping sorry
00:59:05Well anything I'm sorry nothing
00:59:16Store immediately
00:59:19In a hurry are you no lavatories on this train are hereby closed
00:59:24By order of the State Railroad, but that makes no sense at all. It's bureaucracy did the authorities decide we've just got to hold it
00:59:46You
01:00:17You
01:00:32Good morning. Good morning. Hello there. I brought you your coffee
01:00:36It's a lovely day and I brought your coffee. You see how much I don't understand a word
01:00:41Just see how much how much 550 liter coffee and your morning calls, huh? Oh no change. Don't worry about it
01:00:48Here's what I'll do. I'll give you an IOU for a free coffee on your return journey next week. Thank you
01:00:52Thank you, sir. Best of luck, sir
01:00:57One coffee
01:01:11Oh
01:01:41You
01:02:11You
01:02:41I
01:03:11I
01:03:29Have friendly coffee seller
01:03:32What's that
01:03:34I've been looking for you all over the train. Follow me. I've got some customers for you
01:03:39Got any coffee left sure. I've got to stay clear of that conductor. Don't worry
01:03:43They've checked out all the compartments in the first-class cars. Nobody'll bother. It's not just that first class isn't really my style
01:03:49I don't feel at home there
01:03:51Come on, I've got two clients from up north and they're rolling. We're just tying up a big deal
01:03:56500 Leary might be more look you'll make some money and you'll help me to make a good impression. Okay?
01:04:09It's just along here
01:04:14Lucky I know my way around who is that? He's brought us hot coffee, but not just coffee. This is real Neapolitan. Oh
01:04:22Yes, we can all die of thirst in these terrible southern trains
01:04:25I'm here to save you and we're glad to see you Rinaldo coffee. Yes. Thank you
01:04:30Right that three coffees make them nice and strong a best Neapolitan
01:04:34Of course, I can say without boasting we southerners do make the best coffee
01:04:37I don't know why it's our great water or else the way we roast the beans, but I know this
01:04:42It's sure got something very special about it. Here you are friend. No, no, this is mine. I'll get it
01:04:47Oh, please let me know. Let me it'll be my great pleasure guests. No, I insist really
01:04:53Both insist. I won't make a fuss. I'll take the lot
01:04:56The fact is that a thousand lira more or less doesn't really matter
01:04:59Of course, it doesn't my friends here know how to handle money. They're going to start up a new poultry farm near my stoom
01:05:06It'll be my hobby. Listen, why don't we do a deal?
01:05:10Your money and my appetite will get rich and famous every month. We'll go through the books and split the profits
01:05:23We do need somebody as watchman to keep an eye on things
01:05:27But tell me would you agree to work nights if necessary if you offer me a steady job
01:05:32I'll work nights mornings afternoons and all the hours in between
01:05:36Do you really mean it? Yes, but there's one little problem
01:05:39It always is there'll be a lot of hard work clearing the plot and how are you gonna work with just one hand?
01:05:45Stop me. It's just a little rheumatism that I caught last winter. I wear a glove to keep the joints warm
01:05:51It'll soon be better. We'd be taking a bit of a risk though
01:05:54Oh see a job like that would take at least 10 years up and since I only got rheumatism one year ago
01:06:00I've got nine more triple three years
01:06:06Give us a song
01:06:09Yes, I'm not a very good voice I'm sure you're just being modest
01:06:14You know hungry men like me don't sing a lot. Do you mind if we get on with our coffee, please?
01:06:19Do you're the only Neapolitan I know who doesn't sing you're making me look silly
01:06:23Look, if you want work then for Christ's sake Tony, my coffee is getting very cold. We really shouldn't waste it
01:06:28Take your to your
01:06:31Young days in Naples those days of glory nights of glorious passion
01:06:40Have you still got Naples in your heart? Hey, why carry the thought of you?
01:06:59I must forget
01:07:12Well
01:07:15Morning
01:07:16Enjoying your coffee
01:07:19Well, I uh, you mean it's a little bitter. No
01:07:23It's it. It's very unusual
01:07:26Usual
01:07:28Let me tell you the secret of your coffee and how he makes that delicate brew when his thermos gets half empty
01:07:55Oh
01:08:16It's gone 725 get going. Okay, we're going we've got the cops on board. Let's go
01:08:25We got the ministry inspector on board no, no, no, I'll get you leave bastard
01:08:35Give up now
01:08:39Take from you you hear me now
01:08:42Fuck you
01:08:49Shut up you I'm dissolving
01:08:51Shabazzle
01:09:06Let's have your name first
01:09:08Michaela, but yeah
01:09:10Well, so we met at last
01:09:13We've met once already
01:09:14Now you tell us what happened. I tell you the so-called coffee
01:09:18We bought from this crook is a poison which is a threat to every passenger on this train your head is coffee
01:09:23It may not be the very best quality. I know it's a lot more than that
01:09:27Let me show you excuse me
01:09:29You try it captain. This is on the house. We'll see if it's coffee. Yes, that'll prove it. Hey, you know, he's pissed into that
01:09:38Hey, well, why me huh, why don't you try that's not very trusty if you drink it will all the
01:09:48I'm just a bit. Sorry. Nobody trusts me. I'll take my word
01:09:55In the old days the man's word used to be taken on trust
01:10:04Drink it up there. I just want to take some sugar drink it me
01:10:18You
01:10:20You
01:10:22You
01:10:24You
01:10:46Bit
01:10:47It's filled with natural juices by home. I'll be on my way now. You won't on I'm off about my business
01:10:54The coffee is coffee. Just a minute. What else have we got to discuss then?
01:10:59Look here. Have you sold any coffee on this train? Yes, but you see I had to that guy insisted that I serve his friends
01:11:06Hey, don't blame me. You friggin two-bit crook
01:11:08You watch your tongue because if you don't I'm gonna stuff this thing right in your mouth
01:11:13Are you now listen, you can't talk like that to me. I'm an important man
01:11:17Well, you didn't ruin my coffee because you're too weak to piss you bastard. Stop it. I told you before
01:11:23Please wait up there and you shut up to sit down. Give me that basket. Oh, I'm holding it as evidence
01:11:32That's right, how can I sell coffee you're not allowed to sell coffee on this train that my friend is the point
01:11:37How will I eat badly? I'm allowed to starve. Certainly. Come on hand it over yourself for nothing else
01:11:42Did you want what you like to take anything else? Let's have your takings
01:11:46The whole night's worth
01:11:48I earned that money and I'm not handing it over. It's the law. What law is that? Whose law is it?
01:11:53It only takes notice of me when I get arrested
01:11:56I'm not letting you take my money if you want to take something you're welcome to my eyes
01:12:00But you're not gonna take my money. I know it's tough, but I gotta take it
01:12:05There's nothing more to say right, where's the money
01:12:07I guess I'll hand it over piece of me if I can find it
01:12:37Oh
01:13:07I
01:13:09Oh
01:13:36Get back you
01:13:38I'm warning you. I'll throw myself off
01:13:43Don't try to get me I'm gonna jump if you do
01:13:49Get out of here or I'm gonna let go
01:13:56Go away
01:14:08I
01:14:38Oh
01:14:51Come back in you hear me
01:14:57Come on there back up everyone. Yes, sir arrest. Let's get this train moving again
01:15:03Okay, ladies gentlemen, it's all over. There's nothing more to see I'm finding another compartment
01:15:08Thank you back to your seats, please
01:15:26All right, what's your name?
01:15:44Abagnano McKinney
01:15:48His name
01:15:51No
01:15:54In a birth
01:15:58Please answer I don't know exactly but it was a bad day
01:16:03right about Toba
01:16:057 you haven't turned up when you did you could have recorded when I died as well. I don't think you would have done it
01:16:12I didn't have too much choice
01:16:15We're confiscating it all all the money that I need for my son
01:16:19The man who wants to kill himself doesn't yell so loud I see you prefer your suicides to use a nice quiet method
01:16:25I have only one hand what makes you so certain that that I could have held on there much longer. Yes is that
01:16:32You only have the one arm
01:16:34Yes, that's right. What happened to the other one?
01:16:37Doesn't make any difference. I want to write a nice tidy report
01:16:48During the war I served in Russia at a city called I forget the name now stop that yes
01:16:56We had terrible snow everything was frozen solid you can't begin to imagine what the conditions were like
01:17:03The wind was howling and the snow was coming down
01:17:07Did you fight there too? Oh, I fought in the ministry in the ministry. When did you start there in 43?
01:17:14And you don't remember me no in 1950
01:17:18I was cutting marble at the Ministry of Transport in Rome, but one day the wind got to gale force
01:17:24Believe me. It was terrible a block of green marble fell down off the roof
01:17:27I was underneath it and it landed on my left hand
01:17:30They took me to hospital, but there was no hope so it was amputated right there
01:17:34And then your right arm was crushed as well. Yes that time you were stopping two locomotives from crashing
01:17:39No, no, that was the left one before the amputation, of course
01:17:42And which one was it that got run over by a British tank in Africa while you were rescuing wrong
01:17:48That was such a long time ago. I can hardly remember it
01:17:51Which one was burned when the orphanage caught fire? I managed to rescue 16 kids that night
01:17:58How many arms do you have that all this happened to you well not exactly me
01:18:02But it did all happen to someone so it might have been me
01:18:06You
01:18:08Realize I'll have to turn you over to the railroad
01:18:11The phantom monster of the railroad finally brought to justice by the law now listen, when did you last pay your fair?
01:18:18There are fines waiting to be settled in every court between Naples and the Swiss frontier
01:18:23Look, I have to complete my report for the ministry
01:18:26So either you tell me the truth the true facts about your arm or you can tell the courts
01:18:32Or you can tell the other cons in jail, I wasn't to know that it's a crime having this thing
01:18:36No, but it is a crime selling coffee on this train, but
01:18:40That's why you'd better tell me the truth about the arm
01:18:43Perhaps it's something in your favor. It's possible. We wasted enough time. Yes or no. I have to catch a train back to Rome
01:18:50Sorry, inspector, and we'll be at Naples shortly the truth. Are you crippled or not? Is that a real arm or a false?
01:18:58Are
01:19:00You asking me whether it is false that it is true or whether it is true that is false as that
01:19:08Look is it false that my arm is real or is it real that my arm is false?
01:19:12Okay, stop this nonsense. It isn't doing you any good specter. I'll gladly tell you all you want to know only
01:19:23Privately I'm waiting I am too
01:19:29Look at it. You might think he's harmless, but I said I'll tell you alone
01:19:36See okay as he insists you mind waiting outside
01:19:40All right
01:20:10I
01:20:22Knew there must be a reality behind all the crowding around
01:20:26Sometimes that reality is hard to admit
01:20:29But the truth has to come out in the end. Is there only one truth?
01:20:34You thought about that
01:20:36You're obviously an educated man
01:20:39Look a paralyzed left hand
01:20:42There's a truth for you inspector, you know, people don't like to see it. It makes them shudder
01:20:49Yeah, I make up stories about it nice heroic ones people won't get too frightened by a
01:20:54False arm is something to accept and believe in so as far as they're concerned. That's the truth
01:20:59So our friend earns his keep
01:21:01All right, but I can't put your fairy tales in a report. I
01:21:05Want facts, that's all no you don't talk about the comedy
01:21:09I play out because you won't admit that the only real alternative is tragedy
01:21:13You pretend to show lots of concern, but you're no different from anyone else
01:21:26We're through
01:21:29I
01:21:33Expect her so it's not a wooden hand after all. Oh, it's real. I knew he was lying
01:21:38But he says it's paralyzed what time is my train for Rome? I'll go and find out for you
01:21:43I
01:22:00Can't go let's put him down
01:22:05Yeah, that's right stand back
01:22:08They give him a
01:22:12What's wrong
01:22:16Kid needs an operation he's had attacks all his life
01:22:37Oh the poor boy
01:22:49Write a complete report on the affair and send it to Rome who to to you know to the chief of your department
01:22:56Do whoever it was that wine and will you be filing your complaint against our banana when you get back?
01:23:02But that's not up to me a rail inspectors job is to inspect
01:23:06I caught this train to inspect the service. That's all yes
01:23:09But if you don't make any complaint, then I've no real reason for arresting him and you do it you lay the complaint
01:23:15Why does everything have to be left up to me? Okay, call the police officer and leave it to him. Let me make it quick
01:23:21I have to catch my train back
01:23:23Officer could I have a word with you?
01:23:30He's coming well, yeah, he's coming wrong. Yes, I can feel his pulse now good and strong
01:23:37Oh
01:23:46Wait, sir, won't you take it?
01:23:48Garcia's all yours here
01:23:51Yeah, but listen
01:23:53What am I going to arrest the poor guy for?
01:23:58Are they all gone? Yes, they're gone. They're over there having a talk about how to get me some work some real good steady work
01:24:04They're not going to arrest you
01:24:07What made you say such a thing that cop is a good friend of mine. We were in the war
01:24:11I saved his life in Stalingrad
01:24:13The wind was howling terribly the snow was coming down and he was wounded in the leg
01:24:19We just don't have reliable witnesses, did you see him selling coffee on the train I
01:24:26Didn't how about you? No, I didn't did you look I can't afford coffee. I don't even like it and you I'd strictly advise
01:24:34He bad don't what Briggs coffee when they've got a cold
01:24:44Gentlemen did any of you see the alleged man's identity documents his passport or anything else at all?
01:24:49He wouldn't have a passport on him. What if our man's not a banyan? Oh, do we know it's him for certain?
01:24:55Well, we can't be certain well
01:24:57And so was Michele a banyan Oh riding on that train at all not one of us can swear
01:25:27Mickey he saved your precious neck
01:25:31How are you? He's as smart as he's old man is I don't want him to grow up to be as smart as me
01:25:38Cut see the promise
01:25:39That you'll never lie to me. I wasn't I really am out of breath. No, you mustn't tell more lies to anybody
01:25:45I do it now and again, but that's different
01:25:54Well, well you just pretend
01:25:57How could you be so naughty he fooled us all a real chip off the old block
01:26:05What did you do to deserve me
01:26:27You