How Not To Date Your Neighbor - Full Movie
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00The End
00:00:02When we're done
00:00:04I forget
00:00:06All the endings inside my head
00:00:08See? I told you I looked better here, didn't I?
00:00:10Yeah, yeah, you're right
00:00:12Yeah, yeah, you're right
00:00:14Of course I'm right
00:00:16I know what's best for you, baby
00:00:22Oh, that's work. Gotta go
00:00:24Oh, okay
00:00:26What?
00:00:28Oh, nothing, it's just
00:00:30I thought you said you took the day off so you could help me move in
00:00:34Well, you know if I don't work, then I don't get paid
00:00:36And if I don't get paid, how am I supposed to afford those fancy dinners I take you out on?
00:00:40Right
00:00:42Speaking of
00:00:44As of next week, we'll have been dating a whole year
00:00:48Maybe we could do something
00:00:50Well, we've been going out on dates for about a year
00:00:54That's what I said
00:00:56Well, that's not exactly what you said
00:00:58I mean, you're not looking for anything serious
00:01:00Right?
00:01:02What?
00:01:04Well, I mean
00:01:06I mean, I'm trying to start my business and
00:01:08You're waiting on a phone call from the library
00:01:10I think that we're good as is
00:01:12I mean, we don't have to put a label on anything
00:01:14Right, babe?
00:01:16Yeah, right
00:01:18Yeah
00:01:20Okay, well, I gotta go
00:01:22So I will see you later
00:01:24Adam!
00:01:36Oh, shit
00:01:38Perfect
00:01:40Wonderful
00:01:42Oh, shit
00:01:44Perfect
00:01:46Wonderful
00:01:48Uh-huh
00:01:50Uh-huh
00:01:52Uh-huh
00:01:54Uh-huh
00:01:56Okay
00:01:58Uh-huh
00:02:00Ma'am, I need you to stop what you're doing
00:02:02And put your hands in the air
00:02:04Hands above your head
00:02:05What the hell?
00:02:06Ma'am, if you don't cooperate
00:02:07I'm gonna be forced to grab you
00:02:08No, no, no, wait, wait
00:02:09I'm not breaking in
00:02:10This is my apartment
00:02:11I live here
00:02:12Strike three
00:02:13What are-
00:02:14What are you doing?
00:02:15Oh, my God
00:02:16I'm arresting you
00:02:17You look for breaking an entry
00:02:18Oh, my God
00:02:19This is my apartment
00:02:20You lunatic
00:02:21I live here
00:02:22Do you have documentation to prove that?
00:02:23Yeah, check my phone
00:02:24The lease is in my email
00:02:25All right
00:02:26We'll see about that
00:02:27Email, huh?
00:02:28Where do I look?
00:02:29What do you mean?
00:02:30It's right at the top
00:02:31Huh
00:02:32Well, would you look at that?
00:02:33Yeah, okay
00:02:34I'm not afraid
00:02:35I'm gonna be forced to grab you
00:02:36I'm gonna be forced to grab you
00:02:37No, no, no, wait, wait
00:02:38I'm not breaking in
00:02:39This is my apartment
00:02:40Come on, would you look at that?
00:02:41Yeah, okay
00:02:42Can you uncuff me now, please?
00:02:52For the record
00:02:53Credit card works better
00:03:02Welcome home
00:03:03Who are you?
00:03:04Jake
00:03:05Apartment D
00:03:08Nice to meet your neighbor
00:03:10And you are...
00:03:13Noel
00:03:14Pleasure, Noel
00:03:15Well, if you need a cup of sugar
00:03:17Or a...
00:03:18Get out of jail free card
00:03:19You know where to find me
00:03:20How about an apology?
00:03:22For what?
00:03:23Protecting and serving?
00:03:25That's...
00:03:26Kind of my job
00:03:27Oh, so your job is being an impulsive asshole
00:03:29Who goes around cuffing innocent people?
00:03:31See you around neighbor
00:03:42You wish, asshole
00:03:43Jerk
00:03:44Who the hell does he think he is?
00:03:45You're an arrest
00:03:46You're an arrest
00:03:47I live here
00:03:48Hi, Aunt Shelley
00:03:50Jake
00:03:51Who the hell does he think he is?
00:03:52Who the hell does he think he is?
00:03:53You're an arrest
00:03:54I live here
00:03:55I live here
00:03:57Hi, Aunt Shelley
00:04:00Hi, Aunt Shelley
00:04:04Jakey
00:04:05I'm so glad you answered
00:04:06I just wanted to check in with you
00:04:08I miss you
00:04:09It's been so long
00:04:10I miss you too, Aunt Shelley
00:04:12Jake, I know these past few years have been hard for you
00:04:14But your parents wouldn't want you to live this way
00:04:17You're practically a recluse at this point
00:04:20I'm fine, Aunt Shelley, really
00:04:21How about I come by?
00:04:23I can bring this lovely woman you need to meet
00:04:25She's the daughter of my friend from Swim Aerobics
00:04:27No, uh, don't do that
00:04:29I'm actually seeing someone
00:04:31You are?
00:04:33Yeah, I didn't want to say anything
00:04:35Didn't know if it was serious
00:04:37But she just moved in
00:04:40So, uh, no need to set me up
00:04:42Well, I can't wait to meet her
00:04:44I'll pop by sometime
00:04:45No, don't do that
00:04:46She's, uh, shy
00:04:47Nonsense
00:04:58I'm Shelley, I have to go
00:05:00What are you doing in here?
00:05:01I heard screaming
00:05:02I thought you were in trouble
00:05:03Well, it's okay for you to break in but not me
00:05:04Listen, I only came to help
00:05:05But clearly you don't need me
00:05:06So I'll just leave
00:05:07Wait, no, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait
00:05:08There's a spider
00:05:09Uh, is that what all the fuss was about?
00:05:11Yeah, it's a spider
00:05:12Uh, is that what all the fuss was about?
00:05:15Yeah, it's a spider
00:05:17There's a spider
00:05:18There's a spider
00:05:24Uh, is that what all the fuss was about?
00:05:29Yeah, I just can't
00:05:31Here, I'll escort him out
00:05:33The spider now lives in a tree outside your window
00:05:50I thought you were gonna, um
00:05:52Thank you
00:05:55Truths
00:06:00Look, I'm sorry about earlier
00:06:02Honestly
00:06:03I thought you were trying to rob the place
00:06:04And
00:06:05My training kicked in
00:06:14Yeah, truce
00:06:15You were right though
00:06:16I was being an asshole
00:06:17Usually when I'm
00:06:20Cuffing the innocent
00:06:21It's
00:06:22Consensual
00:06:28You're cute when you're flustered
00:06:29I'm not
00:06:30I'm not
00:06:31I'm not flustered
00:06:34You sure about that?
00:06:42Um, I'm seeing someone
00:06:43Congratulations
00:06:44Okay, yeah, so stop flirting
00:06:47Me?
00:06:48Flirting?
00:06:50I'm just being friendly
00:06:51Oh, we're friends now
00:06:53I would say so, yeah
00:06:54I saved your ass twice in less than 24 hours
00:06:57Oh my god, whoever can I repay you?
00:06:58You want a loan?
00:06:59A kidney?
00:07:00Actually
00:07:01Seriously?
00:07:02That was a joke
00:07:03Would you pretend to be my girlfriend?
00:07:05Pretend to be my girlfriend?
00:07:07What?
00:07:10Look, um
00:07:12My aunt's coming to town
00:07:13And I might have
00:07:14Accidentally told her
00:07:15I'm seeing someone
00:07:17So you lied?
00:07:18Potato patata
00:07:22So what do you say?
00:07:23I just told you I'm seeing someone
00:07:24And you're a complete stranger
00:07:25Why would I do this?
00:07:26But I'm not a stranger though
00:07:27I'm your neighbor
00:07:28I'm your neighbor
00:07:30You're friendly
00:07:31Handsome
00:07:33Charming
00:07:35Charitable
00:07:36Lockpicking
00:07:37Lockpicking, yeah
00:07:42Look, you would really be doing me a solid
00:07:44It's a long story about my aunt
00:07:45She's really worried about me
00:07:47She thinks I've given up on love or whatever
00:07:50Have you?
00:07:53Well, that's not the point
00:07:55Look, I just want to give her peace of mind
00:07:57All you have to do is come over for one dinner
00:08:00Tell one little white lie
00:08:02And that's it
00:08:04You're not hurting anyone
00:08:06Please
00:08:07You'd be making a really wonderful woman very happy
00:08:11She's like a second mother to me
00:08:14I don't want to disappoint her
00:08:16One dinner?
00:08:18One dinner
00:08:22Fine
00:08:24Great
00:08:28Am I interrupting something?
00:08:30I don't know
00:08:31Um
00:08:32No, this is, um
00:08:33This is my neighbor
00:08:34Jake
00:08:35Yeah, he was, um
00:08:36Helping me with a spider
00:08:38Babe
00:08:39I told you a million times
00:08:40Just kill it
00:08:42I don't...
00:08:43If you need help
00:08:44You can call me
00:08:45Right
00:08:47Well
00:08:49I should probably go
00:08:50That's a good idea, Jake
00:08:58I'll see you later, Noah
00:08:59Hey, Taylor
00:09:00Reynolds
00:09:01I'm Reynolds today
00:09:02Why so formal?
00:09:03I reviewed your closing numbers and they're not where they should be, we need you getting through more cases per month
00:09:18I'm working as fast as I can, boss
00:09:19No
00:09:20You're fixating all your time on this robbery case and the chief told you to lay off it
00:09:23It's not just one robbery case
00:09:24There's a string of them and I'm sure they're all connected
00:09:25And proving that would make you feel like the big hero
00:09:27It's not about my damn ego, Taylor, it's about justice
00:09:28Well I can't run a department that doesn't meet quota
00:09:31All right, I'll see you later
00:09:33I'll see you later
00:09:36You're fixing numbers and they're not where they should be, we need you getting through more cases per month
00:09:38I'm working as fast as I can, boss
00:09:39No
00:09:40You're fixating all your time on this robbery case
00:09:41And the chief told you to lay off it
00:09:43It's not just one robbery case
00:09:44There's a string of them and I'm sure they're all connected
00:09:46And proving that would make you feel like the big hero
00:09:49It's not about my damn ego, Taylor, it's about justice
00:09:51Well I can't run a department that doesn't meet quota
00:09:54are you sure you're not singling me out for any particular reason
00:10:00excuse me are you implying something officer reynolds
00:10:04I'm not implying anything at all
00:10:06that's what I thought now get back to work
00:10:24oh my god Jake I'm so sorry you know this building has gotten a lot more interesting
00:10:33since you moved in are you okay I'm fine seriously I'm fine
00:10:38um I can get the coffee out don't worry about me no please please let me help I'm really
00:10:47sorry just uh yeah come to my apartment it'll just take a few minutes
00:10:51whatever you say
00:10:55you know I can just bring this over to you after if you want to you know get changed
00:11:09and this magic you're working I don't think so
00:11:13it's just baking soda white vinegar and water works every time
00:11:18you work at a dry cleaners or something
00:11:22no I work in a bookstore
00:11:26you know the one down on main street
00:11:28how do you like it
00:11:30uh it's not exactly my dream but uh
00:11:34it's close I guess
00:11:36what's the dream
00:11:37I just got my MLIS degree to be a librarian
00:11:41I want to be an archivist
00:11:43research how to print children's books at a university library
00:11:47specific
00:11:49how do you get a job like that
00:11:53turns out it's not easy
00:11:56hence the bookstore
00:11:58well
00:12:03if you ever change your mind about careers you have an excellent future and stay in room mobile
00:12:09you're flirting again
00:12:12can a friend compliment another friend
00:12:16I think that's your door
00:12:21Jake
00:12:23are you home?
00:12:26I should go
00:12:27thanks again
00:12:32what are you doing here?
00:12:53where were you?
00:12:54why are you shirtless?
00:12:55don't worry about it
00:12:56what are you doing here?
00:12:57I wanted to apologize for earlier
00:12:59I know you had a rough day
00:13:00and like I said
00:13:02I can't keep you on that robbery case without the chief's permission
00:13:05but
00:13:05maybe I can help take your mind off of it
00:13:08you know
00:13:09the way I used to
00:13:10Taylor
00:13:14we can't do this
00:13:15sure we can
00:13:17we have
00:13:18many times
00:13:30nothing strange
00:13:31we try
00:13:33you're not right for each other
00:13:36I can't give you what you want
00:13:38you don't want me?
00:13:41I don't know what I want Taylor
00:13:43I never do
00:13:47you're an asshole
00:13:51I'm just being honest
00:13:52those are not mutually exclusive traits
00:13:54you know
00:13:55you can't close yourself off forever Jake
00:13:57one of these days you're gonna wake up and realize just how lonely you are
00:14:01look Taylor
00:14:03I'm sorry
00:14:04I really am
00:14:05I hope we can still be professional about all this
00:14:08look I know you don't want a relationship Jake Reynolds
00:14:12but I will be the girl that changes your mind
00:14:15just you watch
00:14:17hello Mr. Saunders
00:14:35Noel
00:14:36I need you to dust the top of the bookshelves today
00:14:39yes sir
00:14:40what an excellent use of my time and talent
00:14:46oh
00:14:58hi
00:15:01sorry
00:15:02I just meant to take my
00:15:04over shirt off
00:15:06um
00:15:07would you mind putting me in the direction of
00:15:09health and fitness?
00:15:11back right
00:15:11I was actually looking for Tony Morrison
00:15:16but uh
00:15:19it's good to know
00:15:19I come off as totally insufferable
00:15:21oh my god
00:15:22I'm so sorry
00:15:24I assumed
00:15:26has anyone ever told you not to judge a book by its cover?
00:15:31uh
00:15:32uh
00:15:33Tony Morrison is right there
00:15:34thank you
00:15:36I appreciate it
00:15:37I'll get it this way
00:15:39oh sorry
00:15:39okay
00:15:39hey what's up babe
00:15:44I got the book that she wanted
00:15:46alright
00:15:48hello
00:16:02hello
00:16:16hey
00:16:18hey sorry
00:16:19I know you're at work but um
00:16:20I just heard from the university
00:16:23I'm sorry Noel
00:16:23I can't talk right now
00:16:25I'm
00:16:25I'm busy
00:16:26right yeah
00:16:26um
00:16:27okay but maybe we could
00:16:28like get a drink after work or something
00:16:30I think it's gonna be a late night
00:16:33brain check?
00:16:35oh my god
00:16:39I'm definitely getting a drink
00:16:40what the hell
00:16:49oh fuck
00:16:56bye
00:16:57okay
00:16:58seriously
00:17:07oh come on
00:17:10uh oh
00:17:11uh oh
00:17:11uh oh
00:17:12uh oh
00:17:13uh oh
00:17:14uh oh
00:17:18uh oh
00:17:20uh oh
00:17:21uh oh
00:17:22uh oh
00:17:23uh oh
00:17:24uh oh
00:17:25uh oh
00:17:26uh oh
00:17:27uh oh
00:17:28uh oh
00:17:29uh oh
00:17:30why are you in my apartment?
00:17:31I'm trying to break in again
00:17:33actually this is
00:17:34my apartment
00:17:36because I'm really tired
00:17:37I cannot entertain right now
00:17:39I know
00:17:40we're gonna get you home
00:17:41I am home
00:17:42not quite
00:17:44hmm
00:17:45can I take it to your place?
00:17:46yeah
00:17:47it's all
00:17:48it's all
00:17:49mmm
00:17:50you smell good
00:17:52thanks
00:17:53come on let's go
00:17:55come on
00:17:56where are you going
00:17:57oh
00:17:58I got you
00:17:59oh
00:18:00my god
00:18:01you're really strong
00:18:02I'll try
00:18:03noelle
00:18:12this is my apartment
00:18:13you can stay here tonight though
00:18:16thank you
00:18:18my hero
00:18:20okay
00:18:21okay
00:18:22okay
00:18:23um
00:18:24none of that
00:18:26none of that
00:18:27but you don't wanna kiss me
00:18:28you don't like me
00:18:33I do wanna kiss you
00:18:34hmm
00:18:35but not right now
00:18:37why not
00:18:39well
00:18:41because you're extremely drunk
00:18:43and also you have a boyfriend
00:18:45I don't have a boyfriend
00:18:47boys don't boyfriend me
00:18:51what about that guy I met
00:18:53we don't think about it
00:19:11goodnight
00:19:13we just fall into each other's arms
00:19:20oh
00:19:21no
00:19:23oh
00:19:25oh
00:19:26oh
00:19:27no
00:19:30no
00:19:31no
00:19:32no
00:19:34no
00:19:35no
00:19:36no
00:19:37okay
00:19:41no
00:19:42no
00:19:43no
00:19:44no
00:19:45no
00:19:46no
00:19:47no
00:19:48no
00:19:49no
00:19:50Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:20:20You've been really doing some great work.
00:20:33You should be proud.
00:20:35Keep it up.
00:20:35Damn it.
00:20:38What's got you so worked up?
00:20:40Nothing.
00:20:41It's nothing.
00:20:42Seriously, Jake, that case wasn't assigned to you.
00:20:45There's another robbery on Main Street.
00:20:47They've got to be connected, Taylor.
00:20:51Let me take a look.
00:20:58Did you check for prints on that banister?
00:21:00No, just the front door.
00:21:02I mean, they might match the ones from last week.
00:21:05Good catch, Taylor.
00:21:07I'll get someone around the prints.
00:21:11I'll do it.
00:21:12You get back to your caseload.
00:21:15Is this punishment for the other night?
00:21:17Punishment?
00:21:18We'll be reporting you to the chief.
00:21:20Now get back to work, Reynolds.
00:21:22You're assigned work.
00:21:33Who is it?
00:21:37It's me.
00:21:38Come on in.
00:21:39Um, hey.
00:21:43Hey.
00:21:44How are you feeling?
00:21:45Uh, so I'm just coming by to say that I'm sorry about last night.
00:21:52Don't worry about it.
00:21:53Um, yeah, I'm honestly not sure how I even got into your apartment, but, um, thank you for letting me sleep on your couch.
00:22:01Anytime.
00:22:03For the record, I did try to get you back to your own apartment.
00:22:05Oh, my God.
00:22:06Oh, my God.
00:22:07That was a mess.
00:22:08You should have thrown me out.
00:22:11Actually, you were kind of cute.
00:22:16No.
00:22:17Oh, God.
00:22:18No way.
00:22:18No.
00:22:18So, you don't remember anything?
00:22:26No.
00:22:27No.
00:22:28God, isn't that embarrassing?
00:22:30Okay, so, um, I'm going to retreat to my apartment in shame now, but...
00:22:36Hey, I'm making burgers.
00:22:41Well, what?
00:22:43Really?
00:22:45They're good hangover food.
00:22:51Mm.
00:22:53Yeah, that's amazing.
00:22:55It tastes just like the ones my mom used to make when I was a kid.
00:22:59She a good cook?
00:23:00Yeah, she was.
00:23:02I'm sorry.
00:23:04Oh, it's okay.
00:23:05I mean, she passed about ten years ago, but before she got sick, she loved cooking.
00:23:11Burgers, yes, but she also made this pound cake and put this amazing fruit compote on it.
00:23:16And, uh, I'm sorry.
00:23:19I tend to ramble, as you've probably noticed.
00:23:23I'm just impressed you can talk about all this.
00:23:27It's a long time ago.
00:23:29Took a while, but, um...
00:23:32No, I like talking about her.
00:23:33Makes me feel like, uh, she's still here.
00:23:40I, um...
00:23:42Lost both of my parents, as well.
00:23:46Both of them?
00:23:48Yeah, I don't talk about it much.
00:23:52You can tell me.
00:23:54If you want.
00:23:55It's, uh, kind of a heavy story.
00:24:04Hey, it's alright.
00:24:06It's alright.
00:24:07Um...
00:24:08Thanks for, thanks for cooking.
00:24:25Anytime.
00:24:27Um...
00:24:28Would your, um, would your pretty friend be okay with us having dinner?
00:24:35I didn't realize you met Taylor.
00:24:37Mm.
00:24:38Yeah, no, I saw her in the hallway the other day.
00:24:41Um, she's beautiful.
00:24:43Yeah.
00:24:44Uh, she's your, is she your girlfriend?
00:24:46No, she isn't my girlfriend.
00:24:48Mm.
00:24:49We just work together.
00:24:50Mm.
00:24:50Okay.
00:24:53We were friends with benefits.
00:24:58But, that was a long time ago.
00:25:00What about your, guy friend?
00:25:10Oh, Adam?
00:25:12I gotta say, I don't love the way he speaks to you.
00:25:15Is he always so...
00:25:17Protective?
00:25:18I was gonna say controlling.
00:25:21Especially for someone who isn't your boyfriend.
00:25:26Yeah.
00:25:28It's complicated.
00:25:30What was that?
00:25:41First pipe.
00:25:42Oh, my God.
00:25:43Get some towels.
00:25:45Yeah, it was crazy.
00:25:47The super says there won't be water or power for, like, at least a week.
00:25:50Maybe two.
00:25:51Jeez, that sucks.
00:25:54Do you need a place to stay?
00:25:55Yeah, yeah, no, that would be great, Adam.
00:25:57A buddy of mine from work, he has a guest house.
00:25:59I'll give you his contact info.
00:26:02Right, right.
00:26:03Thanks.
00:26:04Of course, babe.
00:26:04I told you, you could call me anytime you need help.
00:26:16I soaked up most of the water, but they're gonna need to completely rip out most of your plumbing.
00:26:21Can't get your break, huh?
00:26:24Do you have some place to go?
00:26:25Yeah, no, I'll figure it out.
00:26:28Um, don't, don't worry about me.
00:26:30I'm definitely gonna worry about you.
00:26:31You can't stay here.
00:26:32No, I'll be fine.
00:26:34Look, I don't want to be weird, but I have a second bedroom.
00:26:39Do you want to stay with me?
00:26:42Really?
00:26:42What are friends for?
00:26:50Here we are.
00:26:53I really hope I'm not imposing.
00:26:56Not at all.
00:26:57Seriously, make yourself an elf.
00:26:58The place is all yours.
00:27:00The bathroom is right down the hall.
00:27:03Do you have everything you need?
00:27:04Yes, thank you.
00:27:11I can't believe you're coming to my rescue yet again.
00:27:25Can I go home?
00:27:28Good night, Mom.
00:27:29Good night, Jake.
00:27:34Oh, sorry.
00:27:40I thought you were sleeping.
00:27:41All good.
00:27:42Need anything?
00:27:43Oh, yeah, I just wanted a glass of water.
00:27:47Want a beer, too?
00:27:51Ah, why not?
00:28:04What are you reading?
00:28:06Case files.
00:28:07There's been a string of burglaries.
00:28:09Hopper house.
00:28:11That's what we call it when a burglary happens when the home or business is occupied.
00:28:15This one actually happened at a clothing store on Main Street.
00:28:19Not too far away from where you work.
00:28:20Oh, jeez.
00:28:22I really want to catch this guy before someone gets hurt.
00:28:26What are you gonna do if you catch him?
00:28:29In the act, I mean.
00:28:31In the act?
00:28:32I don't know.
00:28:34Here, let me show you.
00:28:38Okay.
00:28:42If you're being attacked, the first thing you need to do is stay calm.
00:28:47Now, let's say your attacker has a gun.
00:28:52In that situation,
00:28:54you're gonna want to do two things.
00:28:58First thing,
00:29:03just wait for an opening,
00:29:04and then get them off balance.
00:29:05Woo!
00:29:09Good.
00:29:10That was really good.
00:29:11Yeah?
00:29:12Yeah.
00:29:13You're a quick learner.
00:29:15Oh, you're a good teacher.
00:29:20Sorry, I'm probably, um, crushing you.
00:29:22I don't mind.
00:29:26Right.
00:29:27Right.
00:29:29Mr. Complicator.
00:29:35Yes.
00:29:36Thank you for the lesson.
00:29:37It's good.
00:29:38Okay, weirdo.
00:29:42You want another beer?
00:29:44Oh.
00:29:45No, I'm pretty tired.
00:29:47I'm gonna go read a book in bed.
00:29:49Sure.
00:29:50Okay.
00:29:51Goodbye.
00:29:52Good night.
00:30:06Jiki!
00:30:07Aunt Sally,
00:30:08what are you doing here?
00:30:09I told you I'd pop by.
00:30:13You must be the girlfriend.
00:30:14Oh.
00:30:18That's me.
00:30:19Oh, I'm so happy to meet you.
00:30:21I thought my nephew
00:30:22was gonna be alone forever.
00:30:25All right, Aunt Shelley,
00:30:26let her breathe.
00:30:27Oh, of course, of course.
00:30:29Silly me.
00:30:30Please, Aunt Shelley,
00:30:31take a seat.
00:30:32Can I get you a cup of coffee?
00:30:33Yes, please, dear.
00:30:35Okay.
00:30:36Hopefully your lovely girlfriend's manners
00:30:38will rub off on you, young man.
00:30:39Oh, believe me,
00:30:40I'm working on it.
00:30:41I like her already.
00:30:43So, Noelle,
00:30:52I want to know everything.
00:30:54What do you do, sweetie?
00:30:55Um, I work in a bookstore.
00:30:57Oh.
00:30:57Don't be modest, babe.
00:30:59She has her MLS degree.
00:31:01That's so impressive.
00:31:02I'm, uh,
00:31:02I'm looking for jobs
00:31:03at university libraries.
00:31:05I want to make
00:31:06a real contribution
00:31:06to my field.
00:31:08Ever since my favorite book
00:31:09went out of print
00:31:09when I was a kid,
00:31:10I've just been obsessed
00:31:11with researching
00:31:12and archiving.
00:31:13You don't have to explain it to me.
00:31:14Practically the whole family
00:31:16is in academia.
00:31:17You should have seen
00:31:18Jake's parents' library.
00:31:20It was enormous.
00:31:21Oh, what was the book called?
00:31:23The Runaway Sardine.
00:31:24I've been looking for it
00:31:25for a long time,
00:31:26but it's impossible to find.
00:31:28Oh, I love that book.
00:31:29I used to read it
00:31:30to Liam Oliver
00:31:30all the time
00:31:31when he was growing up.
00:31:33Oh, that's Jake's cousin.
00:31:34My son.
00:31:35You'll meet him
00:31:36at the wedding.
00:31:37Wedding?
00:31:39Jake.
00:31:40You didn't tell her
00:31:41about the wedding?
00:31:42Okay, well,
00:31:43this has been a
00:31:43very nice visit,
00:31:45but we have to
00:31:46go to work, so...
00:31:47Oh, of course.
00:31:48I'll see you after then.
00:31:49We can do dinner.
00:31:51What do you mean?
00:31:53Well, obviously,
00:31:54I'm staying over.
00:31:55I came all this way.
00:31:57I'm going to stay
00:31:57a few nights
00:31:58with my nephew.
00:31:59Oh, don't worry.
00:32:00I won't crowd you,
00:32:01lovebirds.
00:32:02Oh, don't worry.
00:32:02I won't crowd you,
00:32:03lovebirds.
00:32:04This is fine, right?
00:32:15Yeah, uh...
00:32:17She needs the spare bedroom.
00:32:20So...
00:32:21We can make a beer here.
00:32:25Great, yeah.
00:32:38So you think
00:32:54we convinced her?
00:32:55Yeah, definitely.
00:32:57Hey, lucky you.
00:32:58Didn't even have to
00:32:59kiss me.
00:33:00It wasn't so bad
00:33:01the last time.
00:33:02Last time?
00:33:06Uh...
00:33:07Yeah, it's just, um...
00:33:09Okay, I don't know
00:33:10how to tell you this.
00:33:11Um...
00:33:13That night
00:33:13you came over
00:33:14really drunk.
00:33:15You kind of
00:33:16grabbed my face
00:33:18and kissed me.
00:33:18Oh, my God.
00:33:18Oh, my God.
00:33:19Only for a second, though.
00:33:20And then I pulled away.
00:33:21I didn't want to
00:33:22take advantage of you.
00:33:24Sounds like I
00:33:24took advantage of you.
00:33:26No, it's totally fine.
00:33:28I'm so embarrassed.
00:33:29Hey.
00:33:31Don't be.
00:33:32I liked it.
00:33:36You did?
00:33:52Um...
00:33:53This is okay, right?
00:33:55I really like you.
00:34:23It's, um...
00:34:25Oh, my God.
00:34:25No, no, no.
00:34:26I'm not rejecting you.
00:34:27I'm not.
00:34:29I like you a lot.
00:34:31You're smart.
00:34:31You're funny.
00:34:32And...
00:34:33I'm really attracted to you.
00:34:35It's just...
00:34:35It's what?
00:34:37It's just that, uh...
00:34:39I got a lot of
00:34:40complicated
00:34:41going on right now.
00:34:41And I don't want to
00:34:43mislead you.
00:34:45So I just want to be clear.
00:34:47If you're looking for
00:34:48something casual,
00:34:49I'm your guy, but...
00:34:52I can't give you
00:34:54anything else.
00:34:54Fuck.
00:35:00Fuck.
00:35:03Why does this always happen?
00:35:06What?
00:35:10Men like me enough
00:35:11to want to be with me,
00:35:12but never to commit to me.
00:35:13No, that's not it.
00:35:14I swear.
00:35:15Oh, let me guess.
00:35:16It's not you.
00:35:17It's me.
00:35:17Yeah, they always
00:35:20say that, too.
00:35:25Um...
00:35:26Good night, Gene.
00:35:41Detective Reynolds.
00:35:43I hate to admit it,
00:35:44but you might be right.
00:35:46What happened?
00:35:46There was another...