King Of The Hill Season 2 Episode 10 Bobby Slam
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00:00Music
00:13Music
00:27Yeah, that was good.
00:43That's what I like about wrestling.
00:45There aren't any rules.
00:47You can do anything to a guy.
00:49Jump on him, stick him with a pin.
00:52The only limit is your imagination.
00:55Don't they have any girl wrestlers in this game?
00:59No, but some of the older ones have some breasts.
01:03Connie, that was your mother on the phone.
01:05She wants to make sure you were doing your homework.
01:08Am I in trouble?
01:09I don't think so.
01:11I told her you were busy wrestling with some word problems.
01:16Oh, Peggy.
01:18Thanks, Mrs. Hill.
01:19I guess I better start my math homework.
01:22Oh, that's got to hurt.
01:46Thanks.
01:47This is Hill.
01:55Dust off your gym skirt, Peggy.
01:57We need a sub for girls' sports.
02:00Location?
02:01Tom Landry Middle School.
02:03Duration?
02:04Indefinite.
02:05Did the previous instructor leave a lesson plan, calendar, notes on a post-it?
02:09Well, that's sort of a funny story, actually.
02:13See, there is no previous girls' coach.
02:15We sort of forgot to hire one.
02:19Hmm.
02:21So, where are you stationed today, soldier?
02:24Fort Mathematics?
02:26Oh, today, I'm teaching gym.
02:29Whoa, now that's serious, Peggy.
02:32Gym is where a boy learns teamwork and the importance of winning.
02:36Actually, I'm teaching girls' gym.
02:39Oh.
02:40Oh.
02:41Good luck to you.
02:42Do I have a clean shirt?
02:45Why choose basketball?
02:48Well, for one thing, it's the only sport where you get to bounce a ball.
02:55You bounce a football, well, that's a fumble, isn't it?
02:58Baseball, no bouncing at all.
03:02Bounce a ball in hockey, that's a mandatory drug test right there.
03:08So, join the basketball team.
03:24Cool.
03:25A little staged, but it's still pretty good.
03:29Gentlemen, I'm not going to try to win you over with a lot of fancy talk about bouncing.
03:36I just want you to know one thing.
03:39Every kid who shows up to wrestle will earn a place on the team and the right to wear this.
03:47Wow.
03:48Silver piping.
03:52Good morning, class.
03:53I am Mrs. Peggy Hill, or Coach Hill.
03:56Now, we are offering you girls a special program which combines the thrills of wrestling with the skills of basketball in something we call general sports.
04:09All right, listen up.
04:18Go on.
04:20I want to start by showing you a basic move.
04:23And I need a volunteer.
04:26You there.
04:28Just come at me.
04:32That's called a center step single leg attack.
04:36Now what are you going to do, huh?
04:38Now what, big man?
04:39You going to dump me?
04:41Huh?
04:41You going to pin me?
04:43This will teach you to pull a knife on me.
04:45Hard to stop a guy when you're hopping around all day, huh, Hoppy?
04:49What?
04:50All right.
04:51Good job.
04:51I hear Eddie Tucker started patching his driveway.
05:08Yep.
05:09Mm-hmm.
05:10Where'd he get his asphalt?
05:13Johnson's.
05:13Dad, Dad, guess what?
05:19I joined a team.
05:20A sports team?
05:22Uh-huh.
05:23Wrestling.
05:24It's the best sport ever, Dad.
05:27There's no running.
05:28Way to go, boy.
05:30Wrestling's a damn fine sport.
05:33Hell, it's an Olympic sport.
05:36And this is offered through the school, right?
05:39Not some guy in a van with a camcorder.
05:42It's the real thing.
05:44I'm in a very advanced weight class.
05:47You hear that, guys?
05:48Bobby made a school team today without me even being the coach.
05:53Congratulations, Hank.
05:55Woo!
06:00What are you here for?
06:02Well, Dooley, a preteen girl is like a skinny little tree
06:06about to enter the hurricane of adolescence.
06:10And if we don't protect and nurture this little tree,
06:14before you know it, she'll be bitter and pregnant.
06:16For that reason, I'm asking the principal for new basketball for the girls.
06:22I peed in some kid's locker.
06:31Girl's sports are a joke.
06:34Yeah, if I just jim-jangle my schedule a bit,
06:39I think I can make it to all of Bobby's practices.
06:42What a great time in a boy's father's life.
06:46Hank, what if Bobby was a girl?
06:49Well, that's just it, Peggy.
06:51I don't think we have to worry about that anymore.
06:54Do you know what that principal said
06:56when I asked for more basketballs for the girls?
06:58He said that the money was earmarked
07:01to put holograms on tickets to the football games.
07:05Holograms prevent ticket fraud, Peggy.
07:07There's a lot of sick people out there.
07:10Well, it's just not fair.
07:11It's like nothing has changed since I was a kid.
07:14Can you run as well as you can hit?
07:33Yes, sir.
07:34I sure can.
07:35And then run over to the store then
07:37and get these boys some sody pop.
07:39That a girl.
07:40Yeah, boys love soda pop.
07:46We got to remember to bring some to Bobby's practice.
07:53Looking good, son.
07:56You too, Dad.
07:59Uh, I wanted to give you this before practice.
08:05You know, you might not be here if it weren't for this cup.
08:08It's made from the finest American steel
08:12ever to come out of Pittsburgh, PA.
08:14This used to be mine,
08:16and before that it was your grandfather's.
08:19There's holes in it.
08:20How am I supposed to drink out of this?
08:24Bobby, it's not for...
08:26Gotcha!
08:26Gotcha!
08:34Rhythm, girls!
08:35First you blow,
08:37then you throw!
08:45Hit them high!
08:47Hit them low!
08:49Landry, Landry!
08:51Go, go, go!
08:53Good spirit, Hill!
08:55Can I have some Gatorade now?
08:57Sure, kid.
08:58You're sweating plenty.
08:59Hey, Connie, how's it going?
09:06Not so good.
09:09I just found out we're not getting uniforms.
09:12You're better off.
09:14We have home uniforms,
09:16away uniforms.
09:17It's so confusing.
09:20Uh-huh.
09:21Did you learn the pile driver yet?
09:23That's not really a wrestling move.
09:26Real wrestling is about holes.
09:28You got your head locks,
09:30your leg locks,
09:32your belly locks.
09:33If you got it,
09:34we'll lock it.
09:36Here, I'll show you.
09:40There's no way out.
09:42Try.
09:43You mean like that?
09:46No.
09:47You didn't use real wrestling.
09:50If you use wrestling,
09:52it's impossible to get out.
09:54But good try.
10:00Hill,
10:00Doug here needs some extra room to scrimmage,
10:03so can you run a posture drill or something?
10:06Get the girls against the wall?
10:09No, I'm afraid I cannot.
10:11I am teaching general sports here,
10:13and I need a general area.
10:16Uh, yeah.
10:17General sports was something Doug here came up with.
10:20It's like home economics,
10:23sort of a code word for busy work.
10:26But the one thing general sports was not meant to do,
10:29and Doug can back me up on this,
10:31is take up space.
10:33Okay, then.
10:35I'm expanding my needs.
10:37General sports is now total sports,
10:40and I need the whole gym and all the equipment,
10:43and Doug can back me up on that.
10:46It's over, Mrs. Hill.
10:59Maybe sports wasn't such a good idea.
11:03Maybe I should do yearbook instead,
11:05or chess club.
11:06Connie,
11:07don't you say that.
11:09Yearbook is a shameful,
11:10squalid waste of time.
11:11Um, now,
11:13you just tell me what sport you want to play,
11:16and I will make sure you play it.
11:20What if it's not a girls' sport?
11:23Oh, poo.
11:24Honey, there is no such thing as boys' sports
11:26or girls' sports.
11:27They're just sports.
11:28Then I want to wrestle.
11:30Well, then,
11:31we will show those coaches
11:33there's nothing a boy can do
11:35that a girl can't.
11:37Go ahead!
11:38Punch it!
11:39Look at that.
11:51Pig in a blanket.
11:52And my Bobby's the chef,
11:54not the weenie.
11:58All right, ladies.
11:59Hit the showers.
12:00And no Oklahoma car washes, neither.
12:03Get your hair wet.
12:09What are you doing here?
12:12Shouldn't you be teaching the girls
12:14about their monthlies?
12:15Uh, no.
12:16Not today, Coach.
12:17Today, I'm teaching a lesson in fairness.
12:20I have someone here
12:21who would like to join the wrestling team.
12:24And her name is
12:24Con Supanusampone Jr.
12:27Does she speak the English language?
12:29Well, of course she speaks English.
12:32Well, then,
12:32tell her wrestling's a boy's sport,
12:34and that's final.
12:35Oh, no, it's not.
12:38Title IX of the Civil Rights Act
12:40clearly prohibits sex discrimination
12:41in public schools
12:43and guarantees equal athletic opportunities
12:46for all boys and girls.
12:48Yeah, well,
12:49Roe versus Wade
12:50doesn't apply to my wrestling team.
12:52Oh, I think you'll find it does apply.
12:55Come on, Connie.
12:57Mrs. Hill,
12:58isn't Roe versus Wade...
12:59Yeah, I know, dear,
13:00but you have to pick your battles.
13:01It was nice of you
13:03to come by, Peggy Hill,
13:05and you can stay
13:06until you finish your zimpy duck.
13:08But wrestling is a boy's sport.
13:10Connie might get hurt.
13:11Oh, boys are given the opportunity
13:13to get hurt all the time.
13:15Connie deserves the same chance.
13:17If Connie gonna get a workout,
13:19she'll be up here.
13:21Build mental toughness.
13:23If you get into a good college,
13:24hire former wrestlers
13:25to pave her driveway.
13:26Dad,
13:27maybe being on the wrestling team
13:29can help me get into Harvard.
13:30Remember how disappointed
13:32you were with my application essay?
13:35You said my first draft
13:36lacked life experience.
13:38She right.
13:39Connie play violin,
13:40sculpt with metal,
13:41and speak three languages.
13:43But what set her apart?
13:45I thought being smart person
13:46in Texas set her apart.
13:49Maybe that's not enough.
13:51I'm sure that wrestling
13:52will have a wonderful effect on Connie.
13:55Well, ever since my Bobby
13:56joined the team,
13:57I've seen marked improvements
13:59in his social skills
14:00and in his balance.
14:02Wait a minute.
14:03Bobby Hill is your son?
14:05Very good.
14:06You follow trail of clues
14:08that start with same last name.
14:10Where you find this guy?
14:11Scotland Yard?
14:12Now, Mr. Sonfona,
14:14Sinfon,
14:15I'm sure there's a simple solution
14:17to all this.
14:18Perhaps you could persuade
14:19your lovely little gal
14:20to take gymnastics.
14:22Asian girls usually excel
14:23at gymnastics.
14:24I mean, with their tiny little feet,
14:26bounce beam seems
14:27just wide as a side wall.
14:29Con Junior,
14:31you want to take gymnastics?
14:34Gymnastics blows.
14:36You heard her.
14:37If my girl doesn't wrestle,
14:38I'll show you
14:39who put the Sue
14:40in Super Noose upon.
14:42Cherry is strictly
14:43an after-wrestling gay raid,
14:46but Lemon Lime
14:47is good any time.
14:49All right, Tinkerbells,
14:50listen up.
14:51We got a situation here.
14:53The girl's gym sub
14:55has got a bee
14:56in her bonnet
14:57about co-heading our team.
15:00Long story short,
15:01we got a gal on deck.
15:04I know, I know,
15:06but there's nothing
15:06we can do.
15:08It all goes back
15:09to Title IX,
15:10Dick Nixon's
15:11biggest mistake.
15:13Now, I know I told you
15:14there's a place
15:15on this team
15:15for all comers,
15:16but now,
15:18I'm not so sure
15:19everybody's going
15:20to make the team.
15:32Hey, Bobby,
15:34did you hear?
15:35Your mom is going
15:36to get me
15:36on the wrestling team.
15:38Now I can hang out
15:39all afternoon
15:39and my mom won't care
15:41because it's practice.
15:42Shh!
15:43I can't remember
15:44my combination
15:46when you're talking.
15:47Okay.
15:50Mom made the coach
16:01take Connie
16:02on the wrestling team
16:03and now he's out
16:04to get me.
16:05Oh, no.
16:07We were so close.
16:08It's all well and good
16:10to talk about equal rights
16:11until some man
16:13loses his job.
16:14How's that equal?
16:15Yeah, and it's worse
16:17when they take away
16:18our favors
16:19because we're used
16:20to getting them.
16:21Now, hold on, Hank.
16:23I'm all for ladies wrestling.
16:26Except when they do it
16:27in pudding.
16:28That's just demeaning
16:30to the human beings
16:31who make pudding.
16:32Ever since they had
16:34that big women's conference
16:36in Beijing,
16:37co-ed sports
16:38has been the number
16:39two priority
16:40on the international
16:42feminite agenda.
16:43You want to know
16:45what the number
16:46one priority is?
16:48Please,
16:49not right now, Dale.
16:50Co-ed bathrooms.
16:54It'll be a cold day
16:56in hell
16:56before we institute
16:57that in the Gribble home.
17:02Bobby was on the verge
17:04of getting a nickname.
17:06I thought you were
17:07keeping busy
17:07teaching girls
17:08how to blow up
17:10basketballs.
17:10When did this turn
17:12into a desire
17:14to ruin wrestling?
17:15Oh, give me a break.
17:17I don't see why
17:17having a girl
17:18on the team
17:18would ruin it.
17:19Did a woman judge
17:20ruin the Supreme Court?
17:22Huh?
17:22Yes.
17:23And that woman's name
17:25was Earl Warren.
17:27Take a seat,
17:28debutantes.
17:29I've got an announcement.
17:31Because of unprecedented
17:32interest in wrestling
17:34this year,
17:35I've decided to hold
17:36tryouts on Friday.
17:38Instead of a guaranteed
17:39spot on the team
17:40this year,
17:42it'll be based
17:42on ability.
17:45I know it isn't fair,
17:48but apparently
17:48that's what some people
17:50like to call progress.
17:52First match,
17:53Kaiser versus Gutierrez.
17:55Fino versus McGimsey.
17:57Sufjanusenthon versus
17:59Hill.
18:01Hill!
18:02Hill!
18:03Hill!
18:04Oh, no!
18:05Ha, ha, ha, ha.
18:07Oh!
18:09You got her
18:13into this piggy here.
18:15You can't abandon Connie now.
18:17She needs help.
18:18She needs training.
18:20Oh, I want to, men.
18:21I feel responsible.
18:23Connie is picking up
18:24the softball bat
18:25that was ripped
18:26out of my hands
18:26as a girl
18:27by that little man
18:28from the Little League.
18:30But then, Bobby,
18:31Bobby's my only son.
18:33I don't know
18:34if I could choose.
18:34Choose Connie.
18:35But Bobby's my only son.
18:37That's not my problem.
18:38Choose Connie.
18:39Oh, what do I do?
18:41What do I do?
18:42Oh, choose Connie.
18:45Choose Connie.
18:47Okay.
18:48We try
18:49outside the ankle breakdown.
18:53Luanne,
18:53try to stop me.
18:55Connie,
18:56you got a four-color pen?
18:57You take good note
18:58this time.
19:01Yes!
19:08Bill,
19:08for crying out loud.
19:10I was listening.
19:12Wrestling a girl,
19:14that's a tough one, Bobby.
19:16If you win,
19:17you get the shame
19:18of having beat up a girl.
19:20If you lose,
19:21you just better hope
19:22she snaps your neck.
19:24That's the quickest way.
19:26Yeah, man.
19:27Dang old dang
19:27if you do,
19:28dang if you don't, man.
19:29That old...
19:30Dad,
19:30what am I gonna do?
19:32I'm danged here.
19:34I'm royally danged.
19:39Now,
19:40the key to wrestling
19:41is the ability
19:42to explode.
19:45The way I figured,
19:46if you can explode
19:47your way out of underneath
19:48a piece of wet carpet,
19:50you can beat
19:51any 12-year-old
19:52in the county.
19:54All right.
19:55Here we go.
19:56One,
19:57two,
19:59three.
20:00Explode!
20:01Explode, boy!
20:03Come on, Bobby.
20:04Light the fuse.
20:05You're a keg of dynamite.
20:07That's it, boy.
20:08You got him
20:09where you want him.
20:13Time to really explode.
20:17A keg of dynamite.
20:24Hey, Hill.
20:25A bunch of us decided
20:27that if you don't
20:29beat that girl tomorrow,
20:31we don't know
20:32what we'll do.
20:34So you better beat her.
20:36Guys,
20:37there's no way
20:38I can lose.
20:39I'm in the best shape
20:40of my life.
20:42Hey,
20:42there she is.
20:44Watch this.
20:46How are you doing,
20:50Connie?
21:00Can we please
21:02just forget
21:02I ever said anything
21:04about this stupid
21:05wrestling thing?
21:06What?
21:07No!
21:07I go out on a giant limb
21:09for you,
21:09Con Junior.
21:11You lose,
21:11you're no longer
21:12my son.
21:13Why don't you edit
21:27the yearbook,
21:28Peggy?
21:31You're so good
21:32with paste
21:33and scissors,
21:34Peggy.
21:35Oh, yeah!
21:37Your arms are so strong.
21:40Why don't you stir
21:41punch at the prom?
21:48Luanne!
21:49Quarters!
21:50I'm sorry,
22:04little Jeffrey.
22:06That's Bobby.
22:08Oh, yeah.
22:09I wanted to call him
22:11Jeffrey,
22:12but some man
22:14wouldn't let me.
22:15You mean Uncle Hank?
22:16Ah!
22:18Ah!
22:22Huh?
22:25Oh!
22:26Remember, take an old playmate down hard and fast.
22:53Mom captured everything on video camera, included in a Harvard application.
22:58Dad, I'm not even in high school yet.
23:01And you never get dealt with that attitude.
23:04You're next, Till. I just wish your mom was here to see you.
23:09She wanted to be here, but she had to sleep in.
23:14Son, I know everyone's been filling your head with crazy stuff, but I just want you to know this.
23:23Connie killed your frog.
23:36Attaboy, Bobby!
23:38Way to go, kind Junior!
23:41Ah!
23:42Ah!
23:43Ah!
23:44Ah!
23:45Ah!
23:46Ah!
23:47Ah!
23:48Ah!
23:55Ah!
23:56Ah!
23:57Ah!
23:58Ah!
23:59Ah!
24:00Ah!
24:02Ah!
24:03What the hell is going on here?
24:23That's not Olympic-style wrestling.
24:26Nope.
24:27That's real wrestling.
24:33I want to go to a party school.
24:43Yeah, Chico State.
24:57She zombified him.
24:59Snap out of it, Bobby.
25:03Oh, that's got to hurt.
25:10Think Dave's had enough?
25:13Not yet.
25:18My eyes!
25:21Yes, Connie, no mercy.
25:24Finish him!
25:25Why are you smiling?
25:38Oh, did Bobby crush that poor girl on her dreams?
25:42Nope.
25:43So that little witch whooped my boy?
25:45No, they figured a way out.
25:48Listen to the cheers, Peggy.
25:49I think they both won.
25:55Oh, yeah!
25:58Look at him explode.
26:00That's my boy.
26:01That's our boy.
26:03That's our Jeffrey.
26:04Oh, yeah!
26:06Oh, yeah!
26:15Yeah!
26:17Oh, yeah!
26:21Oh, yeah!