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00:00:00I'm low, low, low, lost
00:00:03I swear I will be better than I was
00:00:07I thought that I was special, we'll be too careful
00:00:11But I've never been so wrong
00:00:14We had a half, but we messed it up
00:00:18I can't be enough for you, for you
00:00:21We had a half, but I called your bluff
00:00:25I can't be enough for you, for you
00:00:29You walked out, you almost died
00:00:34It was almost a homicide that you caused
00:00:37Cause I was so traumatized
00:00:38Felt like I was in for a long bus ride
00:00:40I'd rather die than me out by my side
00:00:42Can't count how many times I found that it cried
00:00:44Go to my room, turn the radio on and hide
00:00:46You were Bonnie and Clyde, no
00:00:47Honey inside, you were Jekyll and Hyde
00:00:49I felt like my whole relationship with you was alive
00:00:51It was you and I, why did I think it was fire to die?
00:00:54Cause if you could've took my life, you would've
00:00:57It's like you put a knife in my chest
00:00:58I pushed it right through to the
00:00:59Other side of my back, I stuck a slight tooth
00:01:01Shut up
00:01:02More of a fight, but I couldn't at the time
00:01:04No one could hurt me like you could've
00:01:05Take you back now, what's the likelihood of that
00:01:07Pikes bitch, chewing a 19-footer?
00:01:09Cause this morning I finally stood up
00:01:11Held my chin up, finally showed a sign of life
00:01:13In me for the first time since you left and left me
00:01:16With nothing but shattered dreams of the life we could've
00:01:18Had and we could've been
00:01:19But I'm breaking out of this slump I'm in
00:01:21Pulling myself out of the dumps once again
00:01:23I'm getting up once and for all
00:01:24Fuck this shit
00:01:25And one more night Without your hands, with them in your eyes
00:01:31But looking back I wonder why I didn't show you how deep is my love
00:01:39We had a house, but we messed it up I can't be enough for you, for you
00:01:46We had a house, but I called your bluff I can't be enough for you, for you
00:01:54Look, I mean this with love when I say it
00:01:58I wanna answer the phone when you call me
00:02:00The problem is it's 10am and you're already drinking
00:02:02You're probably already wasted
00:02:03What's the point of having conversation with somebody that
00:02:06Won't remember we had conversation yet
00:02:08We always talk about the same things
00:02:10We just say them different, try to fix it
00:02:12Crazy isn't it, you say mama's always proud and play the videos
00:02:14Of us as kids, I get it
00:02:16I think that both of us live in the past
00:02:17So we take for granted the present
00:02:19Maybe next time I'm in Michigan I come and visit
00:02:21We ain't got a lot in common but both of us miss it
00:02:24We can sit inside your smoke, a living room and tear up together
00:02:26That's real
00:02:27It's about taking chances, making moves
00:02:29It's not about what you did, it's what you do
00:02:30Build on what you got and learn from what you lose
00:02:32And never let people distract you from being you
00:02:35One more time, one more night
00:02:37Without your hands, with them in your eyes
00:02:41But looking back, I wonder why
00:02:45I didn't show you how deep is my love
00:02:49It's me out of love, but we messed it up
00:02:52I can't be enough for you, for you
00:02:56It's me out of love, but I called your bluff
00:03:00I can't be enough for you, for you
00:03:04I'm low, low, low, low, low, low
00:03:08I swear I will be better than I would
00:03:12I thought that I was special
00:03:15I thought that I was special and we would be together
00:03:17But I've never been so wrong
00:03:20We had a house, but we messed it up
00:03:23I can't be enough for you, for you
00:03:27We had a house, but I called your bluff
00:03:29We had a house, but I called your bluff
00:03:31I can't be enough for you, for you
00:03:35If you ever say the words
00:03:39I'll never forget
00:03:42Was it something unforgettable
00:03:46Or something I regret
00:03:48And all my pain, all my pain
00:03:51And the fear of being out
00:03:55And all these times
00:03:56You've never been there
00:03:58And I don't know
00:03:59I forget to be alone
00:04:02You're all that I have
00:04:05That's why I'm trying to hold on to you
00:04:06For as long as I can
00:04:08And you just want me for my money
00:04:10So I got you wrapped all in saran
00:04:12Damn, talk about eating out the palm of my hand
00:04:15But if not for my financials
00:04:18I wouldn't have you anyways
00:04:19There have been ample
00:04:2020 days where I'm just in a daze
00:04:23And I can't pull
00:04:24Myself about this rut
00:04:25And you're so much of a handful
00:04:27I can only take so much of you all at one time
00:04:30Because too much of you
00:04:31It's just too much to swallow sometimes
00:04:33Gotta take you in doses
00:04:34But when you're not at my side
00:04:36Eyes shaking, convulsions
00:04:38Separation, anxiety
00:04:39Cause we may be the closest
00:04:41Yeah, baby, we hopeless
00:04:42Don't we make an atrocious
00:04:44Combination, we know
00:04:45It's like playing with explosives
00:04:47Quite dangerous, though
00:04:48But my brain's in hypnosis
00:04:50Such a wide range of emotions
00:04:52Migraines
00:04:53But why the fuck am I taking these motions?
00:04:56I've your throat, Vince
00:04:57Like a drop of rain in the ocean
00:04:59You're my fix on the days when I'm broken
00:05:01But the shit's about to go
00:05:02Sideways, I just know it
00:05:04Nobody said it was easy
00:05:11It's such a shame for us to part
00:05:17Nobody said it was easy
00:05:23No, I won't ever see it
00:05:28It would be this hard
00:05:30I've been playing the world
00:05:32I'll never forget
00:05:35Was it something I forget?
00:05:39Was it something I regret?
00:05:41And all my pain
00:05:43And all my secrets
00:05:45Didn't appear to be enough
00:05:47And all this time
00:05:49You've never been there
00:05:51And I don't know
00:05:52I'm so glad to be alone
00:05:55I've been a liar
00:05:57Been a thief
00:05:59Been a lover
00:06:00Been a cheat
00:06:01And all my sins
00:06:02Need holy water
00:06:04Feeling washing over me
00:06:06I'm a little one
00:06:08Don't wanna whip it to something
00:06:10If all it's gonna cause is pain
00:06:13Truth in my life
00:06:15And I'm falling apart
00:06:16I'm a little one
00:06:18He's coming home with his neck scrap
00:06:20To catch black
00:06:21Sweat jacket
00:06:22Some dress slacks
00:06:23Mismatched
00:06:23On his breast jack
00:06:24He's a sex addict
00:06:25And she just wants to exact revenge
00:06:27And get back
00:06:28It's a chess match
00:06:29She's on his back like a jetpack
00:06:31She's kept track of all this internet chats
00:06:33And guess what just happens
00:06:34To be moving on to the next
00:06:36Actually just shit on my last chick
00:06:38And she has what my ex lacks
00:06:39Cause she loves danger
00:06:41Psychopath
00:06:42And you don't fuck with no man's girl
00:06:44Even I know that
00:06:45But she's to buy some plan
00:06:46To stab him in the back
00:06:47Knife in hand
00:06:48Says her relationship's hanging by a strand
00:06:50So she's been on the web lately
00:06:52Says maybe she'll be my friend Stacy
00:06:54To spite a man
00:06:56And I know she's using me
00:06:57To try to play him
00:06:58I don't care
00:06:59Hi Suzanne
00:06:59But I should've said
00:07:00Bye Suzanne
00:07:01After the first night
00:07:02But tonight I am
00:07:03I've been a liar
00:07:04Been a thief
00:07:05Been a lover
00:07:07Been a cheat
00:07:08My sins need only water
00:07:11Feeling washing over me
00:07:13My little one
00:07:14I don't want to live in
00:07:16Do something
00:07:17Your fault is gonna cause this pain
00:07:19Oh the truth in my life
00:07:22Now I'm falling like the rain
00:07:24So let the rhythm run
00:07:25My nightstand
00:07:26Turn it to nightstand
00:07:27It was calling some ice cream
00:07:28Now we hunt tight
00:07:29And he found out
00:07:30Now she feels deserted and used
00:07:32Cause he left
00:07:33So what he did at first
00:07:34To her too
00:07:35How am I supposed to tell this girl
00:07:37To get through
00:07:38It's hard to find the words
00:07:39I'm aloof
00:07:40Nervous and soon
00:07:40The point that's too hurt
00:07:41But what you deserve
00:07:42Is the truth
00:07:43Don't take it personal
00:07:44I just can't say this in person to you
00:07:46So I revert to the studio
00:07:48And calling up all diners
00:07:49Don't have to be reserved in the booth
00:07:51I just feel like the person
00:07:52Who I'm turning into
00:07:54Irreversible
00:07:54I preyed on you
00:07:55Like it's church at the pew
00:07:56And now that I got you
00:07:57I don't want you
00:07:58Took advantage of my thirst to pursue
00:08:00Why do I do this dirt that I do
00:08:02Get on my soapbox
00:08:03And preach my sermon
00:08:04And speech detergent
00:08:05And bleachers burning the womb
00:08:06Cause now with her in the womb
00:08:08We can't bring her in this world
00:08:09Shoulda knew
00:08:10To use protection
00:08:10Forbidden to your forbidden fruit
00:08:12Forbidden to lie
00:08:13I've been a thief
00:08:15Ain't no love
00:08:16I've been a cheat
00:08:17All my sins
00:08:19Need holy water
00:08:20They're washing over me
00:08:23Well little one
00:08:24I don't want it with me
00:08:25Do something
00:08:26If all it's gonna cause is pain
00:08:29The truth in my life
00:08:31Now I'm falling like the rain
00:08:33So let the river run
00:08:42I lock myself in the bedroom
00:08:57Bathroom
00:08:57Napping at noon
00:08:58Yeah dad's in a bad mood
00:08:59He's always snapping at you
00:09:01Mom show what happened at you
00:09:02Can't stop with these pills
00:09:03And you falling off
00:09:04With your skills and your own fans
00:09:05Are laughing at you
00:09:06If it becomes a problem
00:09:07You're too pussy to attack
00:09:08Oh get up
00:09:09Be a man
00:09:09Stand
00:09:10A real man
00:09:10Would've had your shit handled
00:09:11No you just had your heart
00:09:13Ripped out and crossed
00:09:14They say proof just flipped out
00:09:15Homie just whipped out and fussed
00:09:16Nah
00:09:17It ain't like duty to do that
00:09:19He wouldn't fucking shoot at
00:09:20Nobody
00:09:21He fight first
00:09:21But dwelling on it only makes the night worse
00:09:23Now I'm popping bikes
00:09:24Perks and methadone pills
00:09:26Yeah
00:09:26M-type first
00:09:27You killed it
00:09:28Fucking drug dealers
00:09:29Hang around me like yes men
00:09:31And they gon' do whatever
00:09:32I sense wit
00:09:33I says it
00:09:33It's in the best interest
00:09:34To protect their investment
00:09:36And I just lost my fucking best friend
00:09:38So fuck it
00:09:38I guess then
00:09:39When you feel my dick
00:09:41Look into my eyes
00:09:44It's where my demons hide
00:09:46It's where my demons hide
00:09:49Don't get too close
00:09:52It's dark inside
00:09:54It's where my demons hide
00:09:57It's where my demons hide
00:09:59The curtains call us
00:10:01The last of all
00:10:04When the lights fade out
00:10:06All the sinners crawl
00:10:09So we dug your grave
00:10:12Masquerade with me
00:10:13Masquerade with me
00:10:15I'm calling out
00:10:16I'm calling out
00:10:17I'm calling out
00:10:18It'll get me
00:10:18Don't go name on to the links
00:10:19Don't wing the dr rapidement
00:10:28You don't wanna hide the truth
00:10:32No matter what we breathe
00:10:34We still are made of greed
00:10:37This is my kingdom come
00:10:39This is my kingdom come
00:10:42When you feel my heat
00:10:45Look into my eyes
00:10:48It's where my demons hide
00:10:50It's where my demons hide
00:10:53Don't get too close
00:10:56It's walking inside
00:10:58It's where my demons hide
00:11:01It's where my demons hide
00:11:04We go
00:11:26Youngblood thinks there's always tomorrow
00:11:29I miss your touch on nights when I'm hollow
00:11:36I know you cross the bridge that I can't follow
00:11:42Since the love that you left is all that I get
00:11:48I want you to know
00:11:50I want you to know that if I can't be close to you
00:11:54I'll settle for the ghost of you
00:11:57Don't need more time but time may be borrowed
00:12:01I'd leave it all behind if I could follow
00:12:07Since the love that you left is all that I get
00:12:10Since the love that you left is all that I get
00:12:13I want you to know that I can't be close to you
00:12:15I'll settle for the ghost of you
00:12:19I'll settle for the ghost of you
00:12:23I miss you more than life
00:12:26And if you can't be next to me
00:12:32Your memory's ecstasy
00:12:35I miss you more than life
00:12:38I miss you more than life
00:12:41We never saw it from each other's sides
00:12:43But eye to eye
00:12:44Just eye for eye
00:12:46Lie for lie
00:12:47Fight or flight
00:12:47So much baggage need a luggage rack
00:12:49But we carry on with our public spats and our feuds
00:12:51Up back in the news
00:12:52Luck taps when I disc you
00:12:53Like it was fun actually used
00:12:55To run back to the booth
00:12:56Jump back in the studio
00:12:57Give you a tongue
00:12:58Blasting in you
00:12:59Laugh to the stomach
00:13:00Tap with the tune
00:13:00Stone it was funny back in our youth
00:13:02But then it wasn't after we knew
00:13:03That we were done and actually through
00:13:05You were the beat I love
00:13:07But the writer's block
00:13:08The line that's hot
00:13:08That I forgot
00:13:09We laughed a little
00:13:11Cried a lot
00:13:11I never forget when you came home
00:13:13And you held Haley
00:13:14Day before you went to jail and daily
00:13:15How we'd wait for that male lady
00:13:17Or by the phone for mom to call
00:13:18And I watched you pull yourself up
00:13:20And we decided on
00:13:21Giving it one more try despite it all
00:13:22You're my lightning rod
00:13:23When my sky gets dark
00:13:24I'm your shiny rocks
00:13:25In that tiny box
00:13:26When we tied the knot
00:13:27When we broke the knot
00:13:27Every line we crossed
00:13:28We were supposed to knot
00:13:29Every time we fought
00:13:30The insults to God
00:13:30If I can't be close to you
00:13:34I'll settle for the ghost of you
00:13:37I miss you more than life
00:13:41And if you can't be next to me
00:13:46Your memory is ecstasy
00:13:49I miss you more than life
00:13:53I miss you more than life
00:13:56I miss you more than life
00:14:09I miss you more than life
00:14:11I miss you more than life
00:14:13I miss you more than life
00:14:27Got it, the worst, the run of it, but as stubborn as we are
00:14:31Did I take it too far, cleaning out my closet and all them other songs
00:14:34But regardless, I don't hate you, cause mom
00:14:36You're still beautiful to me, cause you're my mom
00:14:39Though far be it from you to become, my house was Vietnam
00:14:42Desert storm, and both of us put together could form an atomic bomb
00:14:46Equivalent to chemical warfare, and forever we could track this on and on
00:14:50But agree to disagree, that gift from me, a bond of the Christmas tree
00:14:54Don't mean shit to me, you're kicking me out, it's 15 degrees
00:14:56And it's Christmas Eve, little picture Steve, ma let me grab my fucking coat
00:15:00Anything to have each other's goats, while we always at each other's throats
00:15:03Especially when dad, he fucked us both, we're in the same fucking boat
00:15:07You'd think that'd make us close, further away it drove us
00:15:10But together headlights shining, car full of belongings, still got a ways to go
00:15:14Like the grandma's house, it's straight up the road
00:15:17And I was the man of the house, the oldest, so my shoulders carried the weight of the load
00:15:21Then it got taken away by the snake at 8 years old
00:15:24Then that's when I realized you was sick and it wasn't fixable or changeable
00:15:27Into the state we've remained, that's strange and I hate it though, but
00:15:31Pictures of you, scattered on the floor
00:15:38I know you can't be here anymore
00:15:45But maybe if I keep your memories
00:15:51Then I might feel like you're still next to me
00:15:59Cause to this day we've remained, it's strange and I hate it though
00:16:02Cause you ain't even get to witness your grandbabies grow
00:16:05But I'm sorry mama for cleaning out my closet at the time
00:16:08I was angry, rightfully maybe so
00:16:10Never meant that far to take it though
00:16:12Cause now I know it's not your fault
00:16:14And I'm not making jokes
00:16:15That song I no longer play in shows
00:16:17And I cringe every time it's on the radio
00:16:20And I think of Nathan being placed in a home
00:16:22And other medicine use medicine
00:16:24How I just wanted you to taste your home
00:16:26But now the medication's taking over
00:16:28And your mental state's deteriorating slow
00:16:31And I'm way too old to cry
00:16:32This shit is painful though
00:16:33But my, I forgive you
00:16:35So does Nathan, yo
00:16:36All you did, all you said
00:16:38You did your best to raise us
00:16:39Bro, foster care
00:16:40That cost you bad
00:16:41Few may be as happy as yours
00:16:43But I love you Debbie Mathers
00:16:45Oh what a tangled web we have
00:16:46Cause one thing I never asked was
00:16:48Where the fuck my Debbie Dad was
00:16:50Fuck it, I guess he had trouble
00:16:52Keeping up with every address
00:16:53Pictures of you
00:16:57Scattered on the floor
00:17:01I know you can't be here anymore
00:17:07But maybe if I keep your memories
00:17:14Then I might feel like
00:17:18You're still next to me
00:17:21But I'd have flipped every mattress
00:17:22Every rock and desert cactus
00:17:24Own a collection of maps
00:17:26And followed my kids to the edge of the atlas
00:17:28Someone ever moved them from me
00:17:29That you could've bet your asses
00:17:31If I had to come down the chimney
00:17:32Dressed as Santa
00:17:33Kidnap him
00:17:34And all the one has only met the grandma
00:17:37Once
00:17:38You pulled up in our tribe one night
00:17:39As we were leaving to get some hair
00:17:41Reverse me, her, and Nate
00:17:42We introduced you
00:17:43Hugged you
00:17:44And as you left I had this
00:17:46Overwhelming sadness
00:17:47Come over me
00:17:48As we pull off to go
00:17:50Our separate paths
00:17:51And I saw your headlights
00:17:52As I looked back
00:17:53And I'm mad I didn't get the chance
00:17:55To thank you for being mom
00:17:56I met my dad
00:17:57So mom please accept this
00:17:59As a tribute
00:17:59I wrote this on the jet
00:18:01I guess I had to get this
00:18:02Off my chest
00:18:03I hope I get the chance
00:18:04To lay it for him
00:18:05Tag this dude
00:18:06As said to fasten
00:18:07My seatbelt
00:18:08I guess we're crashing
00:18:09So if I'm not dreaming
00:18:11I hope you get this message
00:18:12That I will always love you
00:18:14From afar
00:18:15To my mom
00:18:16Pictures
00:18:17Of you
00:18:19Scattered on the floor
00:18:23I know
00:18:24You can't
00:18:26Be here anymore
00:18:29But maybe
00:18:30If I
00:18:32Keep your memories
00:18:35Then I might
00:18:37Feel like
00:18:39You're still next to me
00:18:43I hold my issues up
00:18:58For all to see
00:18:58Like show and tell
00:18:59A lot of people know me
00:19:00But not a lot know me well
00:19:02I hold my issues up
00:19:03For all to see
00:19:04Like show and tell
00:19:05A lot of people know me
00:19:06But they don't know me well
00:19:07Yeah
00:19:08It's your definition of success
00:19:10I don't trust the thoughts
00:19:12That come inside my head
00:19:13I don't trust this thing
00:19:15The beats inside my chest
00:19:16Who I am
00:19:17And who I wanna be
00:19:18Cannot connect
00:19:19Why?
00:19:19Something I deserve
00:19:20That you get no respect
00:19:21I just made a couple
00:19:22Meals to not impress
00:19:23That you then was
00:19:24Triple platinum
00:19:25Yeah okay okay I guess
00:19:26Smile for a moment
00:19:27Then these questions
00:19:28Start to fill my head
00:19:29And not again
00:19:30I
00:19:30Push away the people
00:19:31That I love the most
00:19:32Why?
00:19:33I don't want no one
00:19:34That know I'm vulnerable
00:19:35Why?
00:19:36That makes me feel weak
00:19:37And so uncomfortable
00:19:38Why?
00:19:39Stop asking me questions
00:19:40I just wanna feel alive
00:19:41Until I die
00:19:42Hey this isn't ace flow
00:19:43Just let me rhyme
00:19:44I'm in disguise
00:19:45I'm a busy person
00:19:47Got no time for lies
00:19:48One of a kind
00:19:49They don't see it
00:19:49I pull out they eyes
00:19:51I'm on the rise
00:19:52I've been doing this
00:19:52For more of my life
00:19:53And no advice
00:19:54Take my chances
00:19:55I just throw the dice
00:19:56Do what I like
00:19:57Cause a kid I was afraid
00:19:58Of highs
00:19:59Put that aside
00:20:00Now I'm here
00:20:00And they look so surprised
00:20:02Well so am I
00:20:02Woo!
00:20:03Don't invite me to the parties
00:20:05But I still thrive
00:20:06Kick down the door
00:20:07And then I coincide
00:20:08Give off that I do not
00:20:09But learn here right
00:20:10Then take the keys
00:20:11Right off the count
00:20:11And let's go for a ride
00:20:12Why do y'all look mortified?
00:20:14I keep to myself
00:20:15They think I'm sorta shy
00:20:16Organized
00:20:17Let you down's the only song
00:20:18You've heard of
00:20:18Well then you're behind
00:20:19Story time
00:20:20Wish that I could think
00:20:21Like Vixone does
00:20:22But I just can't decide
00:20:23If I should stick my knife
00:20:24Inside a penny wire
00:20:25Duty
00:20:26They ask me if I'm happy
00:20:27Are they asking me that
00:20:28Because of the shit
00:20:29They spent on at me
00:20:30Or am I just a little snappy
00:20:32And they genuinely care
00:20:33Duty
00:20:33Most of my life
00:20:34Is to spend me and you there
00:20:36And I continuously
00:20:36Staring pictures of you
00:20:38I never got to say
00:20:39I love you as much
00:20:40As I wanted to
00:20:41But I do
00:20:41Yeah
00:20:42I say it now
00:20:42When you can't hear me
00:20:43What the fuck good
00:20:44Does that do me now
00:20:45But somehow
00:20:46I know you're near me
00:20:47Your presence
00:20:47Oh I went and dropped
00:20:48Some presents
00:20:49Off and eased it to them
00:20:50Two little beautiful boys
00:20:51Of yours
00:20:52To try to ease the
00:20:53Mind's a little
00:20:54And dog
00:20:54You never believe
00:20:55But Sharonda
00:20:56Has to talk to me now
00:20:57Jesus and everyone else
00:20:59Is just trying to pick up the pieces
00:21:00Man how could you
00:21:01Shut so many fucking lives
00:21:02And just leave a snake
00:21:03Finally got him back shit
00:21:05It must have been in league
00:21:0616 years ago
00:21:07While I put him in your cat's sky
00:21:09Movin' past it
00:21:10It's still unregistered yet
00:21:11But you can bet
00:21:12Your legacy
00:21:13They'll never forget
00:21:14The Motor City Motown
00:21:15Hip-hop vet
00:21:16Hip-hop shop dreads
00:21:18It don't stop there
00:21:19Yeah
00:21:20As difficult as it sounds
00:21:21Definition of success
00:21:22I don't trust the thoughts
00:21:24That come inside my head
00:21:25Yeah
00:21:25As difficult as it sounds
00:21:26I don't trust the staining beats
00:21:27Inside my chest
00:21:28Who I am and who I wanna be
00:21:30Cannot connect
00:21:31Why?
00:21:31I don't care what anybody else thinks
00:21:34Lies
00:21:34I do not need nobody to help me
00:21:37Lies
00:21:37I kind of feel guilty
00:21:38Cause I'm wealthy
00:21:39Why?
00:21:40I don't understand
00:21:41It's got me questioning
00:21:42Like why?
00:21:43Just tell me why
00:21:44Not back to this
00:21:44Flow inside
00:21:45I'm rid of mine
00:21:46And back when I ain't had a dime
00:21:48I had to drive
00:21:49Back before I ever signed
00:21:51I question life
00:21:52Like who am I man?
00:21:53Woo!
00:21:53Nothing to lose if I'm good enough
00:21:55I could be working for 24 hours a day
00:21:56If I think I never did enough
00:21:57My life is a movie
00:21:58But there ain't no telling
00:21:59What you gonna see in my cinema
00:22:00I wanna be great
00:22:01But I get in the way of myself
00:22:02And I think about everything
00:22:03That I can never be
00:22:04Why do I do it though?
00:22:04Hey, yeah
00:22:05Why you always looking aggravated?
00:22:06Not a choice
00:22:07You know I had to make it
00:22:08When they talk about the greatest
00:22:09They can probably never put us
00:22:10Into conversation
00:22:10Like something
00:22:11Then I gotta take it
00:22:12Write something
00:22:12Then I might erase it
00:22:13I ain't love it
00:22:14Then I'm really headed
00:22:14What's the problem
00:22:15That I don't know?
00:22:16I know I like to preach
00:22:17To always be yourself
00:22:18But my emotions make me feel
00:22:20Like I am someone else
00:22:21Me and pride
00:22:22Have made it packed
00:22:22And we don't need no help
00:22:23It feels like I'm at war
00:22:24Inside myself
00:22:25But I forgot the shelves
00:22:26I hold my issues up
00:22:28For all to see
00:22:28Like show and tell
00:22:29A lot of people know me
00:22:30But not a lot know me well
00:22:32I hold my issues up
00:22:33For all to see
00:22:34Like show and tell
00:22:35A lot of people know me
00:22:36But they don't know me well
00:22:37Create you right
00:22:45I know it's hard to see
00:22:48The hope inside
00:22:50So baby won't you close your eyes
00:22:56I'll keep the demons from your door
00:22:59Tonight
00:23:01Tonight
00:23:03Create you right
00:23:06I know it's hard to see
00:23:09The hope inside
00:23:12So baby won't you close your eyes
00:23:17I'll keep the demons from your door
00:23:21Tonight
00:23:22Tonight
00:23:24I don't think she understands
00:23:28The sacrifices that I've made
00:23:29Maybe if this bitch had acted right
00:23:31I would've stayed
00:23:32But I've already wasted
00:23:33Over half my life
00:23:34I would've laid down and died for you
00:23:35I no longer cried for you
00:23:36No more pain
00:23:37Bitch you
00:23:38Took me for granted
00:23:38Took my heart and ran it
00:23:40Straight into the planet
00:23:40Into the dirt
00:23:41I can no longer stand it
00:23:43Now my respect I demand it
00:23:44I'ma take control of this relationship
00:23:45Command it
00:23:46And I'ma be the boss of you now
00:23:47God damn it
00:23:48And what I mean is that
00:23:49I won't no longer let you control me
00:23:51So you better hear me out
00:23:52As much you owe me
00:23:53I gave up my life for you
00:23:54Totally devoted to you
00:23:55I've stayed
00:23:56They pull all the way
00:23:57This is how I fucking get repaid
00:23:58Look at how I dress
00:23:59Fucking baggy sweats
00:24:00Go to work I'm less
00:24:01Always in the rush to get back to you
00:24:03I ain't heard you yet
00:24:04Not even once
00:24:05And you appreciate me
00:24:06I deserve respect
00:24:07I've done my best to give you
00:24:08Nothing less than perfectness
00:24:09I know it's hard to see them inside
00:24:16So baby won't you close your eyes
00:24:21I'll keep the demons from your door
00:24:25Tonight
00:24:26Then I know that if I end this
00:24:32I no longer have nothing left
00:24:33But you keep treating me like a staircase
00:24:35It's time to fucking step
00:24:36And I won't be coming back
00:24:38So don't hold your fucking breath
00:24:39You know what you've done
00:24:40No need to go in depth
00:24:41I told you you'd be sorry
00:24:42If I fucking left
00:24:43I'd laugh while you went
00:24:44How's it feel now?
00:24:45Yeah, 20, ain't it?
00:24:46You neglected me
00:24:47Did me a favor
00:24:48At all my spirit free of set
00:24:49But a special place for you
00:24:50In my heart I have kept
00:24:51Don't I give you enough of my time?
00:24:54You don't think so, do you?
00:24:55Jealous when I spend time with the girls
00:24:56Why I'm married to you still, man, I don't know
00:24:58But tonight I'm serving you with papers
00:25:00I'm divorcing you
00:25:01Go marry someone else and make them famous
00:25:03And take away their freedom like you did to me
00:25:05Treat them like you don't need them
00:25:06And they ain't worthy of you
00:25:07Feed them the same shit that you made me eat
00:25:09I'm moving on to get you
00:25:11Oh, now I'm special
00:25:11I feel special when I was with you
00:25:13I know it's hard to see them inside
00:25:19So baby, won't you close your eyes
00:25:25I'll keep the demons from your door
00:25:29Tonight, tonight
00:25:32All I ever felt was this
00:25:36Helplessness
00:25:36Imprisoned by a selfish bitch
00:25:38Chew me up and spit me out
00:25:39I fell for this
00:25:40So many times it's ridiculous
00:25:41And still I stick with this
00:25:42I'm sick of this
00:25:43But in my sickness and addiction
00:25:44You're ridiculous
00:25:45They get evil as they come
00:25:47Vindictivist they make them
00:25:48My friends keep asking me
00:25:49Why I can't just walk away from
00:25:51I'm addicted to the pain
00:25:52The stress, the trauma
00:25:53I'm drawn up
00:25:53Should I guess I'm a mess
00:25:55Cursed and blessed
00:25:55But this time I
00:25:56Ain't changing my mind
00:25:57I'm climbing out this abyss
00:25:58You're screaming as I walk out
00:26:00That I'll be missed
00:26:00But when you spoke of people
00:26:02Who meant the most to you
00:26:03You left me off your list
00:26:04Fuck you, hip-hop
00:26:05I'm leaving you
00:26:05My life sentence is served, bitch
00:26:07And it's just
00:26:07I know it's hard to see
00:26:11The hope inside
00:26:13So baby, won't you close your eyes
00:26:18I'll keep the demons from your door
00:26:22Tonight
00:26:24Tonight
00:26:26Here we go
00:26:49To say that I'm sorry
00:26:50Tell me what I gotta do
00:26:53Cause I can't let go
00:26:55It's chemical
00:26:57Oxytocin making it all okay
00:27:03When I come back down
00:27:06It doesn't feel the same
00:27:08Now I'm sitting around
00:27:11Waiting for the world to end all day
00:27:13Cause I couldn't leave you
00:27:17But I tried
00:27:18You break me
00:27:22Then I break my rules
00:27:23Last time was the last time too
00:27:25It's fucked up
00:27:27I know
00:27:27But I'll stay
00:27:28I found a party
00:27:32Smokin' in the car
00:27:33With you
00:27:34Seven nation
00:27:37All
00:27:37Fightin'
00:27:38Make it all
00:27:39You
00:27:39Tell you that I'm sorry
00:27:42But tell me what I do
00:27:44Cause I can't let go
00:27:47It's chemical
00:27:49I could be with anybody
00:27:53I'd choose you
00:27:54Still
00:27:54There's no excuse to abuse you
00:27:56But no one knows what I'm going through
00:27:58So I'd use you
00:27:59To be truthful
00:27:59I wouldn't know what to do
00:28:01If I lose you
00:28:01So I refuse to
00:28:03Might have a screw loose
00:28:04And a fuse blew
00:28:05But I think I might be
00:28:06Buildin' up a tolerance to you
00:28:07Cause one minute
00:28:08I'm hollering
00:28:09Screw you
00:28:09Next I'll take you back
00:28:10Cause you could say
00:28:11I'm tryin' to unscrew you
00:28:12But the shit's about to pop off
00:28:14Yeah
00:28:14I fill you up
00:28:15Then I got you totally open
00:28:16As soon as I take your top off
00:28:18You're so hard to resist
00:28:19You knock my socks off
00:28:20My friends say you're bad for me
00:28:22I found a party
00:28:24Smokin' in the car with you
00:28:26Seven nation army
00:28:29Fightin' make it all
00:28:31You
00:28:32Say that I'm sorry
00:28:35But tell me what I do
00:28:37Cause I can't let go
00:28:39It's chemical
00:28:41So
00:28:52Great
00:28:53Ready
00:28:54Ready
00:28:59Ready
00:29:00Ready
00:29:04Try
00:29:05Ready
00:29:09Ready
00:29:11Red Fox, please
00:29:13We go
00:29:16Bitch, where the fuck with you, Tuesday?
00:29:19With who you say?
00:29:20I wasn't at the studio, bitch, what you do, school Dre?
00:29:23You went there looking for me, boo, that excuse is too lame
00:29:26Keep playing me, you gonna end up with a huge goose egg
00:29:29You fake, lying slut, you never told me you knew Dre
00:29:32Can't look, hey, you wanna lose two legs?
00:29:34You tryna flip this on me?
00:29:36If I spit more time with you, you say, okay
00:29:38Yeah, and I'm cool, girl, eh
00:29:40Well, screw you and I'll be the third person who screwed you today
00:29:44Oh, four, Dre, Dre, Lupe, ooh, touche
00:29:47Well, you're two-toothed face for me
00:29:49Thought you was my number one true blue ace
00:29:51But you ain't, and I can't see you when you make that little boo-boo face
00:29:55Cause I'm hanging up this phone, boo
00:29:57You make my fucking blue toothache
00:29:59You feeling blue too late
00:30:00Go smirk yourself, you make me wanna smirk and puke blue Kool-Aid
00:30:04Here's what you say to someone
00:30:05You tell me you won't ever fade away
00:30:10You've been the one above me
00:30:12You say no, baby, that won't ever change
00:30:16Cause you're perfect the way you are
00:30:19You're perfect the way you are
00:30:21You tell me you won't ever, ever fade away
00:30:26From ecstasy first, it gets progressively worse
00:30:31Try your best to reverse
00:30:33Unsuccessfully flirting with certain death and reverting to your promethazine urge
00:30:37The fucking devil, he lurks
00:30:39Lose your best friend, he smirks
00:30:40Wake up and everything hurts
00:30:42And as you spiral downward, listen
00:30:44I know just how it is when you start slothin'
00:30:47Before you notice it, now you're mixin'
00:30:48Oxys without prescription
00:30:50Caught medicine valium with them
00:30:51But ain't that how addiction sorta works
00:30:53They call it lean cause you gravitate and lean towards the perk
00:30:56The blessing or the curse of fame
00:30:58Cause now you can afford to serve
00:30:59Percocet and Percodent
00:31:01But that ain't what you meant when you said that you're in it or the perks
00:31:04Develop a habit out of that
00:31:07Need a Sanix, not a rap
00:31:09So you pop it before you record it first
00:31:11Your buzz wear down
00:31:13Like a rabbit out a hat
00:31:15Makes you wanna pull your hair out
00:31:17You tell me that you love me
00:31:18You tell me you won't ever fade away
00:31:22You put no one above me
00:31:24You say no baby, that won't ever change
00:31:28Cause you're perfect the way you are
00:31:31You're perfect the way you are
00:31:33You tell me you won't ever, ever fade away
00:31:59Red Fox Beats
00:32:01Let me go
00:32:04If you ever say it or not
00:32:08I'll never forget
00:32:11Words are fuckin' unforgettable
00:32:15Fuckin' unforgettable
00:32:18And I'm okay, I'm okay
00:32:21And I'm gonna be in love
00:32:25I'll never forget
00:32:27If you ever say it or not
00:32:29Another pill as I start the spiral
00:32:36Message to my daughters
00:32:37I don't even deserve the father title
00:32:39Haley, I'm so sorry
00:32:41I know I wasn't there for your first guitar recital
00:32:43Didn't walk you down the aisle
00:32:45Missed the birth of your first child
00:32:46Your first podcast
00:32:47Lookin' down, sweetie
00:32:48I'm so proud of how you turned out
00:32:50Sorry that I chose drugs and put them above you
00:32:53Sorry that I didn't love you
00:32:55Enough to
00:32:55Give them up how the fuck do I not love you
00:32:58More than a pill lookin' up to
00:33:00The ceiling from this floor on the wheel
00:33:01Alayna, sorry that you had to hear me
00:33:04Fall in the bathroom
00:33:05Sorry that I missed you
00:33:06Grad you
00:33:07Wait, Nate, I should just congratulate you
00:33:09Late you on bein' a dad too
00:33:11Carter and Liam, look at you
00:33:12Little bro, sorry I left you
00:33:14Sorry that I'll never get to
00:33:16Hold a hug, my little nephews
00:33:18Stevie, I'm sorry I missed you
00:33:19Wore up and I didn't get to
00:33:21Be the dad I wanted to be to you
00:33:23Things I wanted to see you do
00:33:25This is my song from me to you
00:33:27Sorry I came up, but I'm just so defeated
00:33:29God, what the fuck you want me to do?
00:33:30Somebody save me
00:33:33Me from myself
00:33:36I spent so long
00:33:40Livin' in hell
00:33:43They say my lifestyle
00:33:47Is bad for my health
00:33:50It's the only thing
00:33:54That seems to fail
00:33:57I've been starin' at the video of Haley
00:34:01Almost daily of her playin' the guitar
00:34:03In hopes, maybe, that'd give me the power to fight
00:34:05But the addict in me's a coward
00:34:07He told me that I can't do it
00:34:08Had a second chance, blew it
00:34:10Just like I'm stuck inside an alternate reality
00:34:12But I know I'll turn it around
00:34:14And be able to walk her in laney one day
00:34:16To the altar, as proud as can be
00:34:18Right now I'm just weak
00:34:20As I fall further down in this deep
00:34:21Holdin' farther in the ground that I sink
00:34:23As they lower me in my coffin
00:34:25I feel the tears all fallin' down on my cheek
00:34:27Somebody save me
00:34:29Me from myself
00:34:33I spent so long
00:34:37Livin' in hell
00:34:40They say my lifestyle
00:34:44Is bad for my health
00:34:47It's the only thing
00:34:50That seems to fail
00:34:54I feel the pain
00:34:56And be able to walk her in laney one day
00:34:59I'm never thinking
00:35:02What the fuck can I forget
00:35:06I feel like I'm not thinking
00:35:09It's all I need
00:35:11It's all I think
00:35:13It's just easy to know
00:35:16That all these times
00:35:18You've never kept it
00:35:20I'm not
00:35:21I'm not thinking
00:35:23If I'm like this, feel like
00:35:48Quit messing it right
00:35:49Why do I put up this fight?
00:35:50Why do I stand right?
00:35:52Sometimes it's hard enough
00:35:53It's dealing with real life
00:35:54Sometimes I wanna jump on stage
00:35:56And just kill Mike
00:35:57And so these people
00:35:58What my level of skills like
00:36:00But I'm still white
00:36:01Confound that it's hate life
00:36:02Something ain't right
00:36:04Get the brake lights
00:36:05Thanks to the stage fright
00:36:06Draw on the plank like
00:36:08The bullies become a bully
00:36:09The horses get pushed
00:36:10Then they better pull me
00:36:11Take me back tonight
00:36:12Brain and screw me
00:36:13Cause I ain't looking back
00:36:14Only four with this old spot
00:36:15Blowing
00:36:16Who couldn't only grow
00:36:17To be a poet
00:36:17And I know it
00:36:18And while I'm being poetic
00:36:19Let me get a stoic
00:36:20And rake the bar higher than my opinion
00:36:22Now these women's been low
00:36:23And so bear witness to some biblical shit
00:36:26There's a coven blow in this world
00:36:27They're gonna know what in it
00:36:28He did it
00:36:28He made it
00:36:29He's finally slamming this
00:36:30And I slam up
00:36:31I just lay it shut
00:36:32I just can't do it
00:36:33My whole manhood's just been stripped
00:36:36I've just been picked
00:36:37So I must think it
00:36:38But the bus didn't split
00:36:40Man, fuck this shit
00:36:41Yo, I'm going up for the home
00:36:43He's gonna have a hard time
00:36:44Explaining it
00:36:45Haley Lane
00:36:46Need these food stamps
00:36:47And this witch shit
00:36:47Cause he never bit shit
00:36:49He hoped and he wished it
00:36:50But it didn't fall in his lap
00:36:51So he ain't even here
00:36:53He pretends that
00:36:53Bellafors are similarly
00:36:55They similar to them
00:36:55Not at all
00:36:56If they don't like it
00:36:57They can all be fucking
00:36:58It's not a sucker anymore
00:36:59They can go get a belt
00:37:00Or a necktie
00:37:00To hang themselves by
00:37:01Like David Carradine
00:37:02They can go fuck themselves
00:37:03And just die
00:37:04He needs shit
00:37:05Why they had it
00:37:06He's fucking had it
00:37:06He's man of the whole world
00:37:08So go to hell
00:37:08And build a snowman
00:37:09Girl
00:37:10That's authenticity
00:37:12You never even see
00:37:14But it's everything to me
00:37:15It's my credibility
00:37:16You've never seen her
00:37:18It's never met her from the sea
00:37:19Who's incredible
00:37:20Up on the same planet
00:37:21Still as me
00:37:22Your chat is still unsigned
00:37:24At an above time
00:37:25Still on the porch
00:37:26With all my friends
00:37:27And kick-helm rhymes
00:37:28Go to work
00:37:29And serve him
00:37:29Seasoned lunch line
00:37:30But when it comes crunch time
00:37:32Where do my voice lines go?
00:37:34Who must I show?
00:37:35To bust my flow
00:37:36Where must I go?
00:37:38Who must I know?
00:37:39Or am I just another
00:37:40Grab on the bucket?
00:37:41Cause I ain't having the flow
00:37:42With this little rabbit
00:37:43So fuck it
00:37:44I'm a gangster
00:37:45You're sure to shit your pants
00:37:46When you saw the chainsaw
00:37:47Gets you waving
00:37:48Like a terrible town
00:37:49Our things turn around
00:37:50When things come out
00:37:51Keep your brains pulled out
00:37:52That's what I call
00:37:52I'm blowing your mind
00:37:53When I come back
00:38:09I will be the only one
00:38:20As it grows
00:38:23I love you more
00:38:24That is all
00:38:25We'll live it for
00:38:27Stay with me, until dawn comes
00:38:30I will be, the only one, as it grows
00:38:34I love you more, that is all we'll live before
00:38:38If I could rewind time like a tape
00:38:40Inside a boombox, one day for every pill
00:38:43Or per cassette that I ate
00:38:44Cut down on the volume, I'd have heard everything
00:38:48But death is turning so definite, wait
00:38:50They got me all hooked up to some machine
00:38:53I love you, P, didn't want you to know I was struggling
00:38:56Feels like I'm underwater, submerged like a submarine
00:38:58Just heard that nurse say, my liver and kidneys aren't functioning
00:39:01Been flirtatious with that skirt chasin' I guess
00:39:04It's a rebidurge, same nurse just heard say they're unpluggin' me
00:39:07And it's your birthday, Jade, I'm missin' your birthday
00:39:10Baby girl, I'm sorry, I fuckin' hate when you hurt, hey
00:39:13And sweeties, thank you for waitin' to open gifts
00:39:15For girls, you can just open them, dad ain't makin' it home for Christmas
00:39:19Wish I had the strength to just blow a kiss
00:39:21I go to make a fist, but I can't make when I'm frozen stiff
00:39:24Stay with me, until dawn comes
00:39:26I will be the only one
00:39:29As you grow, I love you more
00:39:32That is all we're livin' for
00:39:34Stay with me, until dawn comes
00:39:38I will be the only one
00:39:40As you grow, I love you more
00:39:43That is all we're livin' for
00:39:46Hang out when nothin' comes out
00:39:48I'm prayin' inside, I shout
00:39:49My vocal cords won't permit me, I scream, but it's not allowed
00:39:52You put your arm around mama, the karma, wow
00:39:55I just thought about the aisle, I'll never get to walk his gown
00:39:58Never see you, graduate in your cats and gowns
00:40:01It's about to be 2008, how's this happenin' now?
00:40:04I got so much more to do
00:40:05And proof I'm truly sorry if I let you down
00:40:08But this tore me in two
00:40:09I started no more, me and you
00:40:12You gave me shoes, Nikes like new
00:40:14For me for school
00:40:14Duty, I'm tryin', but you
00:40:17You were the glue that binded
00:40:18So many things, time, I'd give anything to rewind it
00:40:21I had to walk down my halls and constantly be reminded
00:40:24By pictures all on my walls and I couldn't sleep at night
00:40:26Cause that aim is burnin' my brain
00:40:28If you on that table, me fallin' across your body
00:40:30Not able to stand to save you
00:40:32God, why did you take him?
00:40:34I'm tryin' to keep his legacy alive
00:40:36But I'm dyin', where's Nathan?
00:40:37Little ladies, be brave
00:40:38Take care of your mother
00:40:40Smile pretty for pictures
00:40:41Always cherish each other
00:40:43Stay with me, until dawn comes
00:40:45I will be the only one
00:40:48As you grow, I love you more
00:40:51That is all we're livin' for
00:40:53Stay with me, until dawn comes
00:40:57I will be the only one
00:40:59As you grow, I love you more
00:41:02That is all we're livin' for
00:41:11I don't wanna lose
00:41:21I don't wanna lose
00:41:21Hold on me
00:41:23Will I recover
00:41:26That broken piece
00:41:30Let go
00:41:31All the things
00:41:32All the feelings
00:41:33All the feelings
00:41:34All the feelings
00:41:36All the feelings
00:41:36Will you be the only one
00:41:39Have you ever loved someone so much you're givin' on for?
00:41:43Not the expression, no
00:41:44Literally givin' on for
00:41:45When they know that you're hard
00:41:47And you know you are their armor
00:41:48And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm us
00:41:51Or what happens when karma turns right around to bite you
00:41:54And everything you stand for, turns on you to spite you
00:41:57What happens when you become the main source of a pain?
00:42:00Daddy, look what I made
00:42:01Dad, gotta go catch a plane
00:42:02Daddy, where's mommy?
00:42:04I can't find mommy, where is she?
00:42:06I don't know, go play
00:42:07Haley, baby, your daddy's busy
00:42:08Daddy's writin' a song
00:42:10A song ain't gonna write us out
00:42:11I'll give you one underdog
00:42:12And you gotta swing by yourself
00:42:14Then turn right around in that song
00:42:16And tell her you love her
00:42:17And put hands on her mother
00:42:18Who's the spittin' image of her
00:42:20That Slim Shady
00:42:21Kid, baby, Slim Shady's crazy
00:42:23Shady made me
00:42:24But tonight, Shady's rockin' my baby
00:42:26I don't wanna lose
00:42:30Cover me
00:42:32Will I recover
00:42:35That broken piece
00:42:38Stay forward
00:42:39And I need
00:42:41All the feelings
00:42:44Now I can't happen to scream
00:42:50I'm pushin' Haley on the swing
00:42:51She keeps screamin', she don't want me to sing
00:42:54You're makin' mommy cry
00:42:55Why, why is mommy cryin'?
00:42:57Baby, daddy ain't leavin' no more
00:42:59Daddy, you're lyin'
00:43:00You always say that
00:43:01You always say this is the last time
00:43:03But you ain't leavin' no more
00:43:04Daddy, you're mine
00:43:05She's pilin' boxes in front of the door
00:43:07Tryin' to block it
00:43:08Daddy, please, daddy, don't leave
00:43:10Daddy, no, stop it
00:43:11Goes in the pocket
00:43:12Pulls out a tiny necklace locket
00:43:14It's got a picture
00:43:15This'll keep you safe
00:43:16Daddy, take it with ya
00:43:17I look up
00:43:18It's just me standin' in the mirror
00:43:20These fuckin' walls must be talkin'
00:43:21Cause man, I can hear em'
00:43:23They're sayin' you got one more chance
00:43:24To do right
00:43:25Then it's tonight
00:43:26Now go out there and show em
00:43:27That you love em
00:43:28For it's too late
00:43:29Then just as I go
00:43:30To walk out of my bedroom door
00:43:31It turns to a stage
00:43:32They're gone
00:43:33And the spotlight is on
00:43:34And I'm singin'
00:43:35I don't wanna lose
00:43:38How lonely
00:43:40Feel like we're covered
00:43:43That broken piece
00:43:46Very bold and unleash
00:43:50All the feelings
00:43:53Ooh, ooh, ooh, yeah
00:43:5750,000 people
00:43:58All jumpin' out this seat
00:44:00The curtain closes
00:44:01They're throwin' roses at my feet
00:44:03I take a bow
00:44:04And thank you all for comin' out
00:44:05They're screamin' so loud
00:44:07I take my last look at the crowd
00:44:08I glance down
00:44:09I don't believe what I'm seein'
00:44:11Daddy, it's me
00:44:12Help, mommy
00:44:13Your wrists are bleedin'
00:44:14But baby, one's sweetin'
00:44:16How did you get the sweetin'?
00:44:17I followed you, Daddy
00:44:18You told me that you were leavin'
00:44:20You lied to me, Dad
00:44:21And now you make mommy sad
00:44:23And I bought through this coin
00:44:24This ass number one, Dad
00:44:25That's all I wanted
00:44:26I just wanna give you this coin
00:44:28I get the point
00:44:29Fine, me and mommy are gone
00:44:31But baby, wait
00:44:32It's too late, Dad
00:44:33You made your choice
00:44:34Now go out there and show em
00:44:35That you love em more than us
00:44:37That's what they want
00:44:38They want you, Marshall
00:44:39They keep screamin' your name
00:44:41It's no wonder you can't go to sleep
00:44:42Just take another pill
00:44:44Yeah, I bet you you will
00:44:45You rap about it
00:44:46Yeah, word can't keep it real
00:44:48I hear applause
00:44:49All this time I couldn't see
00:44:51How could it be
00:44:52That the curtain is closin' on me?
00:44:54I turn around
00:44:55And find a gun on the ground
00:44:56Cock it
00:44:57Put it to my brain
00:44:58Scream, God, shady, and pop it
00:45:00The sky darkens
00:45:01My light flashes
00:45:02The plane that I was supposed to be on
00:45:04Crashes and burn to acid
00:45:05That's when I wake up
00:45:07A long clock's ringin'
00:45:08There's birds singin'
00:45:09It's springin'
00:45:10Haley's outside swingin'
00:45:11I walk right up to Kim and kiss her
00:45:13Tell her I miss her
00:45:14Haley just smiles
00:45:15From winks at her little sister
00:45:16Almost as if the
00:45:18I don't want to lose
00:45:21I don't want to lose
00:45:21I don't need
00:45:23Will I recover
00:45:26That broken piece
00:45:29Spackled and unleashed
00:45:33All the feelings
00:45:36Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
00:45:40I don't want to lose
00:45:55I don't want to lose
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00:57:05Not high, but I'm your highness Secretly, you're my pick
00:57:09But you haters, a butt hurt I'm just your hindin
00:57:12I was just a poor white kid Not rapless, beatball, I be torn like bitch
00:57:17You wish you could score like this Yeah, not even at half court, I'd miss
00:57:20I'm outwash, cause if I was on the floor, I'd switch
00:57:23But I cannot lie, I got you in my top five
00:57:27Worst rappers of all time I lost my spot, y'all got all time
00:57:31King of rap, nah, their words, not mine
00:57:34King of swear words, and not lying
00:57:36You should never compare yours, a toll-free number
00:57:39Only way you'll ever have a hotline
00:57:41What's going on, man? Bunch of half-its in office
00:57:45Half of us walking around like a zombie apocalypse
00:57:48Other half of us fist-offin'
00:57:49Don't wanna wear a mask, and they're just scarfin'
00:57:51That's how you end up catchin' the shit offin'
00:57:53I just use the same basket as you shoppin'
00:57:56Now I'm in a fuckin' casket from you coughin'
00:57:58Always stay ahead of haters, let them hate
00:58:00But never let a trader penetrate your circle
00:58:02Separate yourself of those who try to pull you down
00:58:03The real ones never stray, it's sorta like Medusa
00:58:05That's how you stay ahead of snakes
00:58:07MCs pull out gats, I don't give up a cow strap
00:58:10You're gonna out-rap me, I doubt that
00:58:12Please, bitch, I'm a house rat
00:58:13These raps are out that, cheese like mousetraps
00:58:15Earthlings, I dab to them
00:58:17Certain things I don't wanna do but have to
00:58:19And I order just a vacuuming
00:58:21Like using a bathroom and vacuuming
00:58:23Yeah, rapping in the booth
00:58:25When a triple fat goose has fat soup
00:58:27Bubble rap and a mask too
00:58:28And I don't think that's what they get
00:58:29By the track music
00:58:30Running through things like I'm tattooing
00:58:32Yeah, this is music, we'll be murdered by your love
00:58:35Turn the volume up, I am fired up
00:58:36Like a punch, bread is long, like an octane's up
00:58:38I am drugs, that is probably why you're up
00:58:40When your nummies high as fuck
00:58:41And it's nonstop fury
00:58:43Yes, I ain't holdin' them up like a car robbery
00:58:45Now God's my jury, so when I die, I'm not worried
00:58:47I crash the George Floyd and the Maude Arbery
00:58:49How the fuck is it? There's so many pops all dirty
00:58:52Stop, man, please
00:58:53Officer, I'm sorry
00:58:54But I can't breathe
00:58:55But I got you on top of me
00:58:56Your goddamn knees on my carotid artery
00:58:58Yeah, I know that you ain't no feelings
00:59:03Like I'm supposed to care, I don't
00:59:07It's obvious that I'm not reason
00:59:11But you don't want the smoke, no
00:59:16I'm gettin' used to the jealousy and envy
00:59:30Quit actin' like a hoe
00:59:33R.I.F. of helplessness
01:00:00Helplessness
01:00:01Imprisoned by a selfish bitch
01:00:03Shoot me up and spit me out
01:00:04I doubt for this
01:00:04So many times it's ridiculous
01:00:06And still I stick with this
01:00:07I'm sick of this
01:00:07But in my sickness and addiction
01:00:09Your addictive is naked
01:00:10Evil as they come
01:00:11Vindictivist, they make them
01:00:12My friends keep askin' me
01:00:14Why I can't just walk away from
01:00:15I'm addicted
01:00:16To the pain, to stress, to the drama
01:00:17I'm drawn to sit against
01:00:19I'm a mess
01:00:19Cursed and blessed
01:00:20But this time I
01:00:21Ain't changin' my mind
01:00:22I'm climbin' out this abyss
01:00:23You screamin' as I walk out
01:00:25That I'll be missed
01:00:25But when you spoke of people
01:00:27Who meant the most to you
01:00:28You left me off the list
01:00:29Fuck you, hip-hop
01:00:30I'm leavin' you, mother
01:00:31Sands to hurt bitches
01:00:31Now, sometimes these
01:00:32Rocks in my head speak so loud
01:00:33Every little thing that I think about
01:00:34Just builds on top of the pain and doubt
01:00:36Even though I wanna just let it out
01:00:37I try to act like I don't mind it
01:00:39Try to keep my mouth so quiet
01:00:40But sittin' there in my silence
01:00:41Just seems to amplify it
01:00:43But I thought that keepin' this inside
01:00:45Would make it better
01:00:45I never thought that I would end up
01:00:47Ruining it forever
01:00:48But every time I think I got
01:00:50Everything put back together
01:00:51I end up makin' more regrets
01:00:53Makin' more regrets
01:00:54Glasses and sets of the worst question
01:00:55Is the first question
01:00:56Why do we work like slaves
01:00:58Sweatin' blades to an early grave
01:01:00Never got paid
01:01:01But still we slaves
01:01:02With a non-trade
01:01:02Answer that
01:01:03Then answer this too
01:01:04I'm gonna get till you know it's true
01:01:06Life's a big truth
01:01:07You best to backtrack
01:01:08And try to act black and live
01:01:10Not to be phony and positive
01:01:11But why be negative
01:01:12What's the man?
01:01:14She black hat
01:01:14Got that tongue backtracked
01:01:16Got that tongue down
01:01:17Y'all up to your dick or me
01:01:18Dumb, dumb, deviant to me
01:01:20Attempt to reach
01:01:21Each and every brother on the streets
01:01:23I'm tired of seeing bodies on the streets
01:01:25Now, sometimes these thoughts in my head
01:01:27Speak so loud
01:01:28Every little thing that I think about
01:01:29Just dills on top of the pain and doubt
01:01:30Even though I wanna just let it out
01:01:32I try to act like I don't mind it
01:01:33Try to keep my mouth so quiet
01:01:35But sitting there in my silence
01:01:36Just seems to amplify it
01:01:37Like I thought that keeping this inside
01:01:39Would make it better
01:01:40I never thought that I would end up
01:01:42Ruining it forever
01:01:43But every time I think I got
01:01:44Everything put back together
01:01:45I end up makin' more regrets
01:01:47Makin' more regrets
01:01:48I'm packin' up my shit
01:01:49Smudge shit in the car
01:01:51As I can fit
01:01:51And I'm drivin' as far as I can get
01:01:53Away from these problems
01:01:54And all of my solves
01:01:55I forget
01:01:56What's tomorrow, life?
01:01:57It's the night
01:01:58I'm startin' life again
01:01:59Life is thick
01:01:59Get to the corner and stop
01:02:01What the fuck am I
01:02:02Going to the side cycle
01:02:03And I fantasize
01:02:04Startin' my whole life
01:02:05Oh yeah, right
01:02:06Oh, and I might
01:02:07Oh, and get hypnotized
01:02:08So I don't even recognize
01:02:10No one
01:02:10I try to look alive
01:02:12There's nothing like
01:02:12You're holding your head up high
01:02:14When you get inside
01:02:15And I just hide
01:02:15So, and
01:02:16Feel like a lame piece of shit
01:02:18I saw cranky
01:02:19And bitter, complain, beef
01:02:20And think about the same things
01:02:21Cause when I look at me
01:02:22I don't see what they see
01:02:23I feel a shame
01:02:24Greedy and late
01:02:25We have been contemplating
01:02:27This game being
01:02:27To get a prank
01:02:28Or wherever this world takes me
01:02:30It snickin' me
01:02:31Now, sometimes these
01:02:32Bones in my head speak so loud
01:02:33Every little thing that I think about
01:02:34Just builds on top of the pain and doubt
01:02:36Even though I wanna just let it out
01:02:37I try to act like I don't mind it
01:02:39Try to keep my mouth so quiet
01:02:40But sittin' there in my silence
01:02:41Just seems to amplify it
01:02:43But I thought that keepin' this inside
01:02:45Would make it better
01:02:45I never thought that I would end up
01:02:47Ruining it forever
01:02:48But every time I think I gotta think
01:02:50Put back together
01:02:51I end up makin' more regrets
01:02:53Makin' more regrets
01:02:54I end up makin' more regrets
01:10:31You walked out.
01:10:33Almost died.
01:10:35It was almost a homicide that you caused.
01:10:37Cause I was so traumatized.
01:10:38Felt that guy was in for a long bus ride.
01:10:40I'd rather die than you not by my side.
01:10:42Can't count how many times I found me to cry.
01:10:44Go to my room.
01:10:45Turn the radio on and hide.
01:10:46Power with Bonnie and Clyde.
01:10:47Nah.
01:10:48Honey inside.
01:10:49You were jacking me out.
01:10:50I talked like my whole relationship with you was alive.
01:10:51It was you and I.
01:10:52Why did I think it was I to die?
01:10:54Cause if you coulda.
01:10:55Took my life.
01:10:56You woulda.
01:10:57It's like you put a knife in my chest and pushed a kite through to the other side of my pack.
01:10:59It's like you shoulda.
01:11:01Put up more of a fight.
01:11:02But I couldn't at the time.
01:11:03No one could hurt me like you coulda.
01:11:04Take you back now.
01:11:05What's the likelihood of that fighting bitch chewing a 19-footer?
01:11:08Cause this morning I finally stood up.
01:11:10Held my chin.
01:11:11I finally showed a sign of life in front of you.
01:11:13First time since you left and left me with nothing but shattered trains of the life we
01:11:16coulda.
01:11:17Had and we coulda been.
01:11:18But I'm breaking out of this slump I'm in.
01:11:19Pulling myself out of the dumps once again.
01:11:21I'm getting up once and for all.
01:11:22Fuck this shit.
01:11:23I'm not the only one that's here.
01:11:24Me and the spirits now.
01:11:25And the walls are closing in.
01:11:38I've read from these before.
01:11:39All I know before.
01:11:41I have battled the voices within.
01:11:44Angels I used to know.
01:11:46Had to let them down.
01:11:48Now they busy with beers in the air.
01:11:51My innocence taken.
01:11:53Tried to replace it.
01:11:55Chasing the same things that left me jaded.
01:11:58Must've mistaken my courage for bravery.
01:12:02Wasn't prepared for the turmoil and hatred.
01:12:06Where will you turn?
01:12:08When your conscience is calling your name.
01:12:13Memories burn.
01:12:15I just watch as they go up in flames.
01:12:20I'm in this empty house.
01:12:24I'm not the only one that's here.
01:12:28Me and the spirits now.
01:12:31And the walls are closing in.
01:12:35I've read from these before.
01:12:37All I know is war.
01:12:39I have battled the voices within.
01:12:42Angels I used to know.
01:12:44Had to let them go.
01:12:46Now they busy with beers in the air.
01:12:50You don't gotta cry no more.
01:13:03You don't gotta cry no more.
01:13:05You don't gotta cry.
01:13:06You don't gotta cry no more.
01:13:07You don't gotta cry.
01:13:08You don't gotta cry.
01:13:09You don't gotta cry no more.
01:13:10I don't do nothing.
01:13:11I feel a little disarray from your pain.
01:13:15You ever make it up to the gate?
01:13:16And if you did.
01:13:17I wonder is it a beautiful place?
01:13:18Did he put his arms around you?
01:13:19Make you feel like you're safe?
01:13:20Did he grab you by the hand and say the things are okay?
01:13:24You don't gotta cry no more.
01:13:25You ever make it up to the gate?
01:13:29And if you did.
01:13:30I wonder is it a beautiful place?
01:13:32Did he put his arms around you?
01:13:33Make you feel like you're safe?
01:13:34Did he grab you by the hand and say the things are okay?
01:13:36This is me though.
01:13:37This is me though.
01:14:06This is me though.
01:14:09You don't gotta cry.
01:14:11You don't gotta cry no more.
01:14:14I hope you're out there looking down on us with a smile on your face.
01:14:19You don't gotta cry.
01:14:21You don't gotta cry no more.
01:14:25I hope you're out there with God feeling love that's set free from your pain.
01:14:29Have you ever been hated or discriminated against?
01:14:31I have.
01:14:32I've been protested and demonstrated against.
01:14:35I get signs for my wicked rhymes.
01:14:36Look at the times.
01:14:37Sick as the mind of the and keep this behind.
01:14:39This is me though.
01:14:40This is me though.
01:15:00This is me though.
01:15:02You don't gotta cry.
01:15:03You don't gotta cry.
01:15:04You don't gotta cry no more.
01:15:07I hope you're out there looking down on us with a smile on your face.
01:15:12You don't gotta cry.
01:15:14You don't gotta cry no more.
01:15:17I hope you're out there with God feeling love that's set free from your pain.
01:15:22I look at the situation you had.
01:15:24Might have made a mistake of leaving but it's making me sad.
01:15:26Thinking of you.
01:15:27How you grew up trying to cope with your past.
01:15:29When you like me and your relationships and pushed them right down.
01:15:31This is me though.
01:15:32You don't gotta know mama.
01:15:33Did you think you were trash?
01:15:34Something disposable that nobody could love or be glad.
01:15:37To say they was with you.
01:15:38That issue is the issue I had.
01:15:39That's why I hurt me when Brittany gave me those letters you sent.
01:15:42I barely read.
01:15:43Any of them knowing I'd let them go to my head.
01:15:46Didn't get to me especially when I feel I related.
01:15:48Might not be around for my babies but know when I say that I love you that I mean it.
01:15:52Okay cause nobody's perfect.
01:15:54Yeah I guess we all fall short.
01:15:55And I can't hold this unforgiveness in my heart no more.
01:15:58So just know you're lovable to me.
01:16:00And of course you'll always be mama to us.
01:16:02We'll save a table for four years.
01:16:04You don't gotta cry.
01:16:07You don't gotta cry no more.
01:16:10I hope you're out there looking down on us with a smile on your face.
01:16:15You don't gotta cry.
01:16:17You don't gotta cry no more.
01:16:21I hope you're out there with God feeling love that's set free from y'all.
01:16:24I got some skeletons in my closet and I don't know if no one knows it.
01:16:27So before they throw me inside my coffin and close it.
01:16:29I'ma expose it.
01:16:30I'll take you back to 73.
01:16:32Before I ever had a multi-platin selling TV.
01:16:34I was a baby maybe I was just a couple of months.
01:16:37My father must have had his panties up in a bunch.
01:16:40Does he split?
01:16:41I wonder if he even kissed me goodbye.
01:16:42No I don't no second thought as a **** wish that he would die.
01:16:45I look at Haley and I couldn't picture leave on the side.
01:16:47Even if I hated Kim.
01:16:49I grit my teeth and I try to make it work.
01:16:51But or at least for Haley's sake.
01:16:52I may be making mistakes.
01:16:53But I'm only human.
01:16:54But I'm mad enough to face him today.
01:16:56What I did was stupid.
01:16:57No doubt it was dumb.
01:16:58But the smartest **** I did was take the bullets out of that gun.
01:17:01Cause I'd have ****ed him.
01:17:02And I would've shot Kim and him both.
01:17:03This is my life.
01:17:04I'd like to welcome y'all to the imminent zone.
01:17:06I'm sorry mama.
01:17:07You don't gotta cry.
01:17:09You don't gotta cry.
01:17:11No, no, no.
01:17:12I hope you love that looking down on us with a smile on your face.
01:17:17You don't gotta cry.
01:17:19You don't gotta cry.
01:17:21No, no, no.
01:17:23I hope you love that we got feeling love that set free from your face.
01:17:27You don't gotta cry.
01:17:36You don't gotta cry.
01:17:37This is Nilo.
01:17:40A lot of people ask me am I afraid of death.
01:17:46The truth is I think what scares me the most is not being able to say all the things I want to say to you when I'm no longer here.
01:17:56I'm no longer here, so this song is for Hayley, for when that day comes.
01:18:02Where's Hayley?
01:18:05Where is she at?
01:18:07This ain't Hayley.
01:18:08Who is it?
01:18:10It's a monster.
01:18:14I've been waiting all night for the sunrise to take away the dark sky.
01:18:21Yeah, monster.
01:18:23You're no more the baby monster than I'm the mom monster.
01:18:26All it takes is a new day sometimes to get me in a better state of mind.
01:18:32Give me a kiss for you.
01:18:33Is that your piano?
01:18:35Love you.
01:18:36If I could just fall asleep, I'd be lost in a dream.
01:18:42But right now it's misery.
01:18:46And I just have to remember that when my heart breaks, it ain't broken forever.
01:18:53The pieces will grow back together.
01:18:56And in time I'll be fine.
01:18:59The tears are temporary.
01:19:02Yeah.
01:19:03So Hayley Jade, I wrote you this song to help you cope with life now that I'm gone.
01:19:07How should I start?
01:19:09Just wanna say, look after Elena, Stevie and Uncle Nate.
01:19:13And sweetie, be strong.
01:19:14I know I was your rock, and I still am.
01:19:18Saying goodbye is just not ever easy.
01:19:21But while you crying, just stop.
01:19:23Hayley, baby, dry your eyes.
01:19:25This is not forever.
01:19:27And you will get over me and move on.
01:19:29You can play me on repeat on a song.
01:19:31But don't you dare shed a tear, what I tell you.
01:19:34Straighten up, little soldier.
01:19:36Them times when I held you.
01:19:37Jade, it'll be okay.
01:19:39Baby, I'm here.
01:19:40Hey, I'm watching you right now.
01:19:42Baby girl, I vow.
01:19:43I will protect you.
01:19:45Your guardian ain't choke.
01:19:46It's hard as this may feel.
01:19:48Us parting is painful.
01:19:49And darling, the rain will drive you insane.
01:19:52Still, you will remain strong.
01:19:54Hayley, just hang on.
01:19:55It won't be too long.
01:19:57I need you to move on.
01:19:59And remember, it will get better.
01:20:01Cause time heals and when I-
01:20:02When the heart waves, it ain't broken forever.
01:20:05The pieces will grow up together.
01:20:08And in time, I'll be fine.
01:20:11Tears are temporary.
01:20:14The bad days will start to get better.
01:20:17And we'll be laughing together.
01:20:20And tonight, when I cry, do you have a temporary?
01:20:26I know this big girl.
01:20:28And she's really pretty.
01:20:30You know who the name is?
01:20:32Hayley.
01:20:33Hayley.
01:20:34How did you know?
01:20:35Hey.
01:20:36Hey.
01:20:37Yeah.
01:20:38And if there's days where you want it, just lock yourself in your room and cry.
01:20:41Just think about how when you were little, how you and I.
01:20:44Back and forth to the studio, we used to drive.
01:20:47You strapped in the backseat, cause you were mine.
01:20:51Little sidekick, yeah.
01:20:52Sweetie, I know this hurts.
01:20:54Bean, I'm wishing your pain away.
01:20:55Remember this Hayley Jade.
01:20:57There's gonna be rainy days.
01:20:58I promise you, get through them and make it regardless.
01:21:01Fuck it, Jade.
01:21:02I'll be honest.
01:21:02I knew that you was gonna take this the hardest.
01:21:05Sweetie, get up.
01:21:06I know that this is breaking your heart.
01:21:08It's the hardest thing I've ever wrote.
01:21:10Hayley, sweetheart.
01:21:10It's okay for you to let me go.
01:21:13Baby, I promise you that.
01:21:14When the heart breaks, it ain't broken forever.
01:21:17The pieces will grow back together.
01:21:20And in time, I'll be fine.
01:21:23The tears are temporary.
01:21:26The bad days will start to get better.
01:21:29And we'll be laughing together.
01:21:32And tonight, when I cry, the tears are temporary.
01:21:37What's your favorite song?
01:21:40Favorite song?
01:21:42I mean, I'm going to play a song.
01:21:44Mine and your favorite song?
01:21:45I mean, I'm going to play a song.
01:21:47It's perfect.
01:21:48Favorite part, Dan?
01:21:50Can you have a tape?
01:21:52Bitch.
01:21:53Bitch.
01:21:54I got your tape, Russell.
01:21:57Can you hear?
01:21:58Yep.
01:22:00No, bitch.
01:22:02No, what?
01:22:03No, I said no, bitch.
01:22:06Okay.
01:22:07Okay.
01:22:07Okay.
01:22:08Okay.
01:22:08Okay.
01:22:09Okay.