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00:00Now, video games are, at their very core, very silly experiences. Even if their content is
00:06incredibly serious, it's meant to be fun on some level, and you don't get more fun than when it
00:12comes to joke weapons. Because, you know, being killed by a giant sword is one thing, but then
00:17being killed by a weapon that shoots rabid badgers at you, well, that's definitely another. So let's
00:22have a chat about them today. As I'm Jules, this is WhatCulture.com, and these are 10 joke game
00:26weapons that are secretly incredibly powerful. 10. The Quacker – Crackdown 2
00:32By and large, Crackdown 2 was a bit of a letdown because it borrowed just way too much from its
00:37predecessor while only making few significant changes or advancements. However, one saving
00:41grace was that it turned an almost useless easter egg from the first game, The Quacker,
00:45into an adorably fatal device. Specifically, and as the name suggests, The Quacker is a sticky
00:51grenade disguised as a duck. Equally fitting is the fact that it's found at the Funland Amusement
00:56Park at the Chuck's Ducks 2 stall after the area is seized from terrorist organization The Cell.
01:01Once planted, its eyes glow red, and it emits a lovable quacking sound, eagerly awaiting your
01:06overpowered officer protagonist to hit the detonation button. When you do so, it explodes
01:12with enough energy to severely damage, if not instantly obliterate, everything around it.
01:16Without a doubt, this is one rubber ducky you don't want to toy around with in the bath.
01:209. The Golden Chicken Egg – Resident Evil 4 2023
01:25Last year's Resident Evil 4 remake was widely praised for maintaining and even improving upon
01:30nearly everything that made it such an inspirational classic in the first place. In typical Capcom fashion,
01:35that meant that it was full of outlandish costumes and items, with the Golden Chicken Egg becoming
01:40Leon S. Kennedy's most ridiculous but actually cunningly effective upgraded instrument of destruction.
01:45Well, if only for just one boss fight. You see, in the original 2005 title, the Golden Chicken Egg
01:50could be sold for 3,000 pesetas. It could also be used to stun enemies or ingested to restore 100%
01:56health. Now, as alluded to with the disgrace of the Salazar family quest, though, the 2023 remake
02:01goes a step further by allowing you to stun antagonist Ramon Salazar and deplete 70% of his health in just
02:08one hit. Admittedly, finding a Golden Egg can be a tedious task. I mean, one is located around the east side
02:14of the lake after you get the boat, whereas the other requires the cubic device to unlock a treasure
02:18box in the castle's throne room. But nevertheless, being able to take down one of Resident Evil 4's
02:22nastiest baddies so quickly and humorously is a cracking good time.
02:268. The Water Pistol
02:27Metal Gear Solid V – The Phantom Pain
02:30Hideo Kojima's iconic series is ripe with tongue-in-cheek collectibles and artillery,
02:35including risque magazines, bananas, a rocket arm, and even Mario and Yoshi dolls. Although Metal Gear
02:40Solid V – The Phantom Pain's toy water pistol may actually seem like the most pointless one of
02:45them all, it's actually more tactically deadly than it superficially is jokey. Developed after
02:49Venom Snake completes Mission 18 and obtains the Children's Reward key item, the water pistol can be
02:55upgraded and is initially convenient for just putting out fires, holding up guards, stunning the
02:59parasite unit aka the skulls, and creating noises for distractions. That being said, its true secretive
03:05potential lies in its ability to detonate mines from far away, kill electronics, and best of all,
03:11take down the man on fire. You see, the intended way to conquer the man on fire during Mission 20
03:16is to douse him with H2O from the pipes scattered around the level. Yet, it's likely easier to simply
03:21shoot him with the water pistol several dozen times and watch him become increasingly annoyed and weak.
03:26Sure, it's possibly the slowest way to knock him down, but it's also delightfully sadistic and very,
03:31very silly. 7. The Toy Spitball Gun – Dead Rising 2
03:35In contrast to the other entries on this list, there's scarcely a weapon throughout the entire Dead
03:39Rising franchise that's not a gag of some sort, particularly when it involves combining two or
03:44more unrelated items. Nonetheless, the toy spitball gun from Dead Rising 2 and Dead Rising 2 off the
03:49record takes the cake when it comes to not judging a book by its comical cover. Now ordinarily, it does
03:54precisely what you'd assume against the common undead foe, which is absolutely nothing. But when shot
03:59at the fleeing helicopter of Terra Is Reality host Tyrone TK King during Case 5-2, it does a lot of
04:06damage because it's classified as a thrown object rather than an otherwise ineffective firearm or
04:11projectile. Now why that's the case is anyone's guess, but you know what? I'm sure glad that it does
04:15that, because this boss battle is annoying. But that's not the gun's only hidden advantage either,
04:20as it can be turned into the Fire Spitter once joined with the Tiki Torch. Instead of blowing a
04:25steady stream of flames like a standard flamethrower, it shoots significantly more powerful fireballs that
04:29engulf anyone who dares crosses your path. 6. The Thirst Zapper
04:34Fallout 4 Found within the sixth and final DLC for 2015's Fallout 4 Nuka World, the Thirst
04:40Zapper appears to be a joyfully retro but majorly futile water gun whose main purpose is to help with
04:46three Nuka-cade games, Nuka Zapper, Bandit Roundup, and Whack-A-Commie. However, once the project Cobalt
04:52schematics, as well as the gun nut and science perks, are employed alongside the VATS targeting system,
04:57it's possible to transform the Thirst Zapper into a truly formidable firearm. Specifically,
05:02it can become the Nuka-Cola Gun, which dishes out radiated Nuka-Cola damage, the Cherry Gun,
05:08which sparks small explosions, or the Quantum Gun, which causes consistently fatal nuclear blasts.
05:14Clearly, it's quite a devastating firearm when fully modified. Even in its purest form,
05:18the Thirst Zapper is able to turn the tables on Raider leader over Boss Coulter during the
05:23Taken for a Ride quest, since, you know, his power armor is electrified and therefore highly
05:27susceptible to water. It's possible to kick his butt without using the Thirst Zapper,
05:31but why wouldn't you when it's so damn fun and so very easy this way?
05:365. The Wooden Sword
05:37Ninja Gaiden
05:38Now, wooden swords have to be amongst the most common weapons in all of video games,
05:42with The Elder Scrolls, 5 Skyrim, Little Big Planet, The Legend of Zelda, Kingdom Hearts,
05:47and Supraland being a handful of the many titles to feature them. Even so, arguably none of them
05:51possess the same world-shattering capability as the wooden sword in 2004's Ninja Gaiden.
05:56To be clear, it's not so much the initially limited wooden sword that's worthwhile. It's what happens
06:01when the tool is fully transformed into the unlabored flawlessness, following over half a
06:06dozen upgrades that warrant celebration and a lot of hesitation. Simply put, the unlabored
06:11flawlessness can perform aerial attacks and mirror some of the moves harnessed by other heavy weapons.
06:15It also has some unique combos as well. Its greatest attribute, though, is its propensity to do more
06:20damage when the player's health is low. In fact, it does 150% of its usual lethality when protagonist
06:26Ryu is at 25% health, and when he's basically on death's doorstep, it does 200%. It even glows
06:33when supercharged, which is just plain cool, and it can be purchased from Maramusa at any point during
06:38Hayabusa's journey.
06:394. The Scrambler – Enter the Gungeon
06:42Look, there's no rule to having more than one chicken-centric example on a list, especially
06:46when the second one is as merrily goofy yet lethal as Enter the Gungeon's Scrambler gun.
06:51Now, to be fair, Devolver Digital's treasurable top-down bullet-hell roguelike is packed with
06:55ridiculous items, but the Scrambler definitely outdoes them all. Basically, it's similar to the
07:00flare gun, but it fires a large egg that breaks into five smaller and thus deceptively dangerous
07:04homing eggs. It's inherently a strong shooter, but it gets better when synergies, which are
07:09upgrades from holding multiple weapons at once, come into play. For instance, when pairing it with
07:13the pig, it results in the bacon and egg synergy that increases the speed of the Scrambler's eggs
07:18by 50%. Likewise, the chicken flute spawns the bullet or the egg synergy that doubles the size of
07:24each shot, which breaks up into ten smaller bullets instead of the usual five. Other combinations,
07:29such as with the light gun, phoenix, or weird egg, lead to new effects as well, meaning that the
07:33Scrambler is remarkably menacing and versatile.
07:363. A Simple Fork
07:38The Elder Scrolls V Skyrim
07:40The Elder Scrolls V Skyrim is just a gift that keeps on giving, being it in terms of its narrative
07:45engagement, character development, endless exploration, or, in this case, its knack for
07:50surprising players with secret weapon opportunities. Now, the fork is a superb example of this, because
07:55while it's very ineffective during the base experience and can't be upgraded, it gets a lot
07:59more heft in the Dragonborn, Dawnguard, and Hearthfire DLCs thanks to its compatibility with
08:04enchantments. In particular, pairing it with Paralyze allows it to, well, paralyze an enemy
08:09for ten seconds. Likewise, Frost Damage freezes up their health and stamina, Fire Damage burns them,
08:14Soul Trap fills a Soul Gem with Vanquished Combatants, and Shock Damage electrifies their
08:18health and magicka. You can even add Chaos Damage to intensify its first strike physicality. And while all
08:24of this does apply to the knife as well, destroying people with a fork, well, it's just much funnier
08:28and more satisfying. Of course, you could use them together to double your humor and hazardousness.
08:332. The Frying Pan
08:34Fable
08:35Now, hitting people in the face with a frying pan is an age-old staple of slapstick comedy,
08:40so it only makes sense that you can do it in the wonderfully quirky Fable and Fable the Lost
08:44Chapters. What's not so predictable, however, is the amount of harm your culinary accessory can cause.
08:49Digging it up in the orchard farm before you find all six treasure clues will render it worthless,
08:54since it won't do any damage or have any augmented slots. On the other hand, finding it after all
08:58the clues are uncovered results in the frying pan having up to five slots, and if all of them are
09:03used, well, it gets exponentially more threatening. Filling it up with mana or health augmentations
09:08recharges those abilities every time the item is used, whereas the experience augmentation grants
09:1310% extra experience with each kill. The sharpening augmentation does the same for weapon damage,
09:18and the lightning and flame augmentations ensure that weapons are especially fatal to monsters who are
09:23already weak against those elements. There's almost no limit to how much tougher the frying pan can
09:27make you, and the bizarre face on the inside, well, that's just obviously an added treat.
09:31At number one, the sexy beam, Silent Hill 3. There are many things that players might expect from the
09:37Silent Hill universe, primarily sadistic violence, grotesque monsters, and mind-bending mysteries,
09:42yet erotic extermination from a teenager probably isn't one of them. Enter Silent Hill 3's sexy beam,
09:48which is only available if our main hero Heather Mason has both the transform costume wand and the
09:53Heather beam. Basically, Heather needs to use the wand to become her alter ego, Princess Heart,
09:58whose Sailor Moon-esque attire and posing definitely make for some uncomfortable viewing for someone her age.
10:03If the Heather beam is equipped as well, it'll turn into the even more savage, sexy beam, which combines
10:09the Heather beam's projectiles and targeting acquiring lasers into a single higher-powered strike,
10:13complete with flickering white hearts. She can also shoot rays from her glowing eyes in what feels
10:18like an unsetting allusion to the hallway seen in Ghostbusters 2. Additionally, unlike the Heather
10:23beam, the sexy beam doesn't even drain Heather's stamina, so she's consistently able to be at the
10:28height of her formidableness. This makes it a scarily salacious force to be reckoned with,
10:32but when you look at it, it's downright weird, and even more hilarious.
10:36And there we go my friends, those were 10 joke video game weapons that are secretly incredibly
10:40powerful. I hope you enjoyed that, and please let me know what you thought about it down
10:43in the comments section below. As always, I've been Jules, you can go follow me over on FGS or
10:47the Future Game Show, where I do all of my gaming content going forward, or you can swing by
10:51Instagram, where it's at RetroJ, but the O is a zero. Hope to see you over there. But before I go,
10:56I just want to say one thing. Hope you're treating yourself well with love and respect, because you
10:59deserve all the best things in life, alright? Hope you're smashing your life goals today. I believe
11:02in you. Now go out there and get it done. As always, I've been Jules, you have been awesome,
11:06never forget that, and I'll speak to you soon. Bye.