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Short filmTranscript
00:00:30I'm still here.
00:01:00And so are you.
00:01:46So?
00:01:47You're not going to tell me your name?
00:01:49Don't make it a big thing, Mom.
00:01:50Well, she invited you to hang out.
00:01:52I know that.
00:01:53Hey.
00:01:54Hey.
00:01:55Hey.
00:01:56Hey.
00:01:57Guess who just might have a girlfriend?
00:02:00I heard he's got two of them.
00:02:02I didn't say that.
00:02:03Oh, my gosh.
00:02:04You guys are annoying.
00:02:06Good nap?
00:02:10Yeah.
00:02:11Weird dreams.
00:02:13I still have this headache that won't go away.
00:02:16You think you should call out?
00:02:18No.
00:02:19They're probably short-staffed, as it is.
00:02:23Speaking of which, have you seen my ID anywhere?
00:02:25Yeah.
00:02:26This is what happens now that you're only volunteering twice a year.
00:02:28She gave me a hard time to let them look forward.
00:02:30Yeah.
00:02:31Guilt trip, man.
00:02:32Yeah.
00:02:33Yeah.
00:03:03What's he doing tonight?
00:03:04He said he's hanging out at a friend's house down the street.
00:03:08What about you?
00:03:09You still going to do that work thing?
00:03:11I decided to ditch it and go to my sister's.
00:03:14She's having her annual shindig.
00:03:16It's quite a hike, isn't it?
00:03:17I know.
00:03:18I just feel like I owe her a visit.
00:03:20Check out the invitation she sent.
00:03:23Julia's New Year's eight bonanza.
00:03:25Well, you can't miss that.
00:03:28This came from your brother.
00:03:29I was thinking of putting him on the fridge.
00:03:32Who are those sweaters?
00:03:36I think the sweaters are cute.
00:03:38Dad, did you get the Lakers tickets yet?
00:03:40Oh, shit.
00:03:42No, not yet.
00:03:43I'm still working on it.
00:03:44If you give me your card, I can order them,
00:03:46because they're going to sell out.
00:03:47No, no.
00:03:48I'm going to do it.
00:03:50Oh, um, I almost forgot.
00:03:53I had coffee with Matt Chauvin's yesterday.
00:03:56He asked to read your book.
00:03:58It's really not that type of thing, you know?
00:04:01Well, he was thrilled to give you notes,
00:04:03so I sent it to him.
00:04:06Is that a problem?
00:04:09No, I mean, look, it's, uh,
00:04:11he's just a big-time fiction writer, you know?
00:04:14And you asked him to read my dumb little memoir.
00:04:16Wow, okay.
00:04:17No more goodwill gestures from me.
00:04:19No, okay.
00:04:20Appreciate it.
00:04:22Tracy Hooper was given the letter
00:04:24of a nine-year-old accident
00:04:26victim of a round-round operation.
00:04:28No!
00:04:29No!
00:04:30No!
00:04:31No!
00:04:32No!
00:04:33No!
00:04:34No!
00:04:35No!
00:04:36No!
00:04:37No!
00:04:38No!
00:04:39No!
00:04:40No!
00:04:41No!
00:04:42No!
00:04:43No!
00:04:44No!
00:04:45No!
00:04:46No!
00:04:47No!
00:04:48No!
00:04:49No!
00:04:50No!
00:04:51No!
00:04:53You've reached Andrew.
00:04:54Please leave a message,
00:04:55and I'll get back to you.
00:04:56Hey my brother, it's me.
00:04:57Just calling to say Happy New Year.
00:04:59I got those photos you sent.
00:05:00Thanks for those.
00:05:03Anyway, give me a call back.
00:05:05Let's catch up.
00:05:06because i'm at work right now you cannot just drop this on me last minute ty it's new year's eve
00:05:32fine no i just can't argue about it right now you know what i'll figure it out
00:05:45steven hi how are you good good to see you how are you ah you know same old same old not interrupting
00:05:53am i and no that was just my ex-husband dropping the ball again i actually have to go and get my
00:05:59kids he got his dates all messed up and now it's impossible to find a sitter actually i think it's
00:06:03just going to be you here most of the night cindy's off at 11. oh uh okay i'm so sorry steven i know
00:06:09it's a lot from one person but i just no no no no it's fine it's fine go be with you kids it's okay
00:06:15you're a lifesaver come on you're the hero i'm the one who sold out and went into private practice
00:06:20okay well at least use my desk i do have the nice chair thank you all right all right
00:06:36lifeline
00:06:41hello
00:06:41i don't want to talk about myself okay i understand hello
00:07:11lifeline
00:07:17hello
00:07:22it's uh it's okay if you're not ready to talk but uh can i get your name at least
00:07:31mary mary hi mary i'm steven
00:07:35i don't really know how this works well it's uh really whatever you feel like you need
00:07:47what made you call in this evening and there's no right answer to that i want to feel like this
00:07:53i want it to be over please don't tell the police where i am because they'll
00:08:04no no no no no no no i won't i promise this call is anonymous so you don't have to worry about that okay
00:08:12okay just like to talk a little bit about how you're feeling
00:08:16um did uh did something happen at home tonight maybe a fight with family or uh yeah yeah yeah
00:08:26can you tell me a little bit about that
00:08:32um
00:08:33it doesn't
00:08:38i had it's been all over the place and no one i know gets it so i got these pills
00:08:48you have the pills with you now
00:08:51mm-hmm
00:08:55they're for sleep and depression but i figured if i take enough
00:08:59well i'm really hoping you don't do that mary there's no other way i don't have a choice
00:09:06now why do you say that what when you say that you don't feel like you have a choice what do you mean
00:09:12by that
00:09:15mary can you can you tell me where you are right now are you at home no i'm in palm springs my
00:09:23husband rented a house here for the holidays but he knows that you've been having a hard time
00:09:31what
00:09:32but he knows that you've been hurting
00:09:40mary
00:09:40i don't trust him he's the reason i'm the the reason that you uh that you feel like hurting yourself
00:09:48yeah he drove us out here because i was having problems there was a medication change i went through
00:09:58recently and i told him i was in therapy and he got really mad
00:10:05talk um i don't think i can talk one longer why not
00:10:09mary is it because you're worried about your husband finding out yeah
00:10:20has your husband ever hurt you
00:10:24no but i'm afraid of him it's hard to explain
00:10:29no no i think i understand um but i gotta say things um they sound really tense over there
00:10:42tonight so i'd like to come up with a safe word or uh or phrase in case your husband comes home and
00:10:49we're still talking what do you mean what it is just a way for you to let me know that you're feeling
00:10:55unsafe so it it doesn't trigger your husband can we do that okay fine yeah okay great so the best
00:11:04thing to do is to pick a word or a phrase that's really easy to bring up in a conversation
00:11:14like he's so wonderful or something yeah yeah that's great he's so wonderful works that's great
00:11:20and you remember that right just in case yeah okay i don't know it feels really risky
00:11:30mary listen i i just want to do whatever we can to no no no mary mary wait wait are you still there
00:11:38if we can get you someplace safe tonight away from your husband okay just until your therapist is
00:11:46available do you think that you could hold off on maybe taking those pills
00:11:55i i don't i don't know maybe maybe well can you give me your address
00:12:02and i just feel better if we got you out of that situation
00:12:08away from him 578 flamingo drive 578 flamingo drive and you said you're in palm springs right
00:12:17but honestly i i think it'd be easier to just send it mary mary mary
00:12:22it just keeps happening i know listen i understand mary i i understand listen but that would be
00:12:33that would be a really big mistake and one that you cannot take back do you understand that
00:12:37s마ry mary mary
00:12:43s마ilic
00:12:47s마ilic
00:13:17Lifeline, how can I help you today?
00:13:47And give that hot bath a try, okay?
00:13:53Yeah, you too.
00:13:57Lifeline.
00:14:15Sorry, I'm sick.
00:14:19Okay.
00:14:21Well, that's okay, but this line is specifically for mental health purposes, so...
00:14:27So what?
00:14:29Well, if you have a cold, then you should talk to a doctor or someone more qualified than me.
00:14:39No, I mean, I also want to kill myself.
00:14:43Okay, that is something that we should talk about.
00:14:47Can you hold on a second?
00:14:51Sure.
00:14:53Listen, if this is a prank call, I'm gonna hang up, okay?
00:15:03Julia, what are you two doing?
00:15:09What are you doing?
00:15:11Yeah, sure.
00:15:17Hi, hi.
00:15:19You all right?
00:15:21Oh, yeah.
00:15:23It's just a little coffee, Brian.
00:15:27You all right?
00:15:29Oh, yeah, it's just a little coffee, Brian. Thanks.
00:15:49How's your night going?
00:15:51Pretty good.
00:15:53Feels like it's been nonstop.
00:15:55Yeah, I'm gonna make a little coffee.
00:15:57Jason.
00:15:59Lifeline.
00:16:19Lifeline.
00:16:21Hi.
00:16:23Uh, my wife Mary called a little while ago.
00:16:25My name's Jason.
00:16:27Okay.
00:16:29Yeah, hi.
00:16:31She, uh, you know, well, I'll let her explain.
00:16:35She's right here.
00:16:37Hello?
00:16:39Hi Mary, it's Steven.
00:16:41Um, yeah, I just wanted to call and say I was sorry about before.
00:16:49My meds, they just make me think crazy.
00:16:53Thoughts, and...
00:16:55Mary, is your husband there with you right now?
00:16:59Uh-huh.
00:17:01Yeah.
00:17:03He's so wonderful.
00:17:09Well, thanks for letting me know you're okay, and have a good rest of your night.
00:17:15Yeah.
00:17:17Happy New Year.
00:17:19You too.
00:17:31Palm Springs Police Department.
00:17:32What's your emergency?
00:17:33Hi, my name is Steven Thomas, and I'm a hotline responder at the Lifeline call center.
00:17:37There's a lady in your area at 578 Flamingo Drive, and I believe that there's a possible, uh, domestic violence situation with her husband.
00:17:47All right.
00:17:49Let me put you through to an officer on patrol.
00:17:51Hang on.
00:18:03This is Officer Fredericks with the Palm Springs PD.
00:18:05You were reporting a domestic violence case.
00:18:07Yeah, she's at 578 Flamingo Drive.
00:18:11That's the address dispatch, Dennis.
00:18:14Is there a number I can reach you at?
00:18:16Sure.
00:18:17My cell is 717-555-6455.
00:18:22Great.
00:18:23I'll give you a call back once we get eye on her.
00:18:26What was the name again?
00:18:27Mary, I didn't get a last name.
00:18:29Okay, well, we're on our way now.
00:18:32Great.
00:18:33I appreciate it.
00:18:46I appreciate it, thanks for being a little bit of a little bit.
00:18:47And we'll get the last name of our next morning.
00:18:48I don't know.
00:18:49I don't know what's up to you.
00:18:51I think they're, I don't know.
00:18:52If you've had any problems in this group, I'm not sure about my физics.
00:18:56I don't know if you've had any problems in this group.
00:18:57I don't know.
00:18:58You need to know what you think of this group.
00:19:00All right.
00:19:32Lifeline.
00:19:37I'm gonna kill myself.
00:19:40Okay.
00:19:42Can you tell me a little bit about why?
00:19:49It wouldn't make sense.
00:19:52Well, I'd like to try and understand.
00:19:55I'm in no rush.
00:20:02Can you tell me a little bit about yourself?
00:20:05Like what?
00:20:07You, um, you have a job.
00:20:09Are you a student?
00:20:12I go to UCLA.
00:20:14Oh, yeah? I went there.
00:20:16I mean, a while ago, but, um...
00:20:20What's your name?
00:20:22Steven.
00:20:24Steven. That's my name, too.
00:20:28Where are you right now, Steven?
00:20:31In a motel.
00:20:34I bought a gun.
00:20:38I gotta be honest with you, Steven.
00:20:40Um...
00:20:43Guns make me really nervous in this kind of situation.
00:20:48Did you tell anyone else where you are?
00:20:51I...
00:20:53I tried to tell my girlfriend, but...
00:20:55Er...
00:20:57Ex-girlfriend, but...
00:20:59We just got into a fight, so...
00:21:02I'm sorry to hear that.
00:21:05What's your girlfriend's name?
00:21:10It's Vivian, but everybody calls her Viv.
00:21:14And you said your name is Steven?
00:21:16Yeah.
00:21:17What's your last name?
00:21:19Thomas.
00:21:21So, so, uh...
00:21:24You wouldn't happen to have gone to, uh,
00:21:26Woodrow Wilson High School, did you?
00:21:29Yeah, how did you know that?
00:21:32I'm gonna put you on hold for just a second, all right?
00:21:37Hello?
00:21:38Hey, it's me.
00:21:39Dad?
00:21:40Yeah, nice work with that, uh, prank call there.
00:21:42What?
00:21:43That was good.
00:21:44Did you get your mom in on that, too?
00:21:45Dad, I seriously have no idea what you're talking about.
00:21:48But so the guy that called in claiming to be me,
00:21:50you knew nothing about that?
00:21:51No.
00:21:52And, Dad, it's really loud here right now, so...
00:21:54Okay.
00:21:55All right, well, we'll talk about this later.
00:21:56Okay, bye.
00:21:57Okay.
00:21:58Bye.
00:21:59Bye.
00:22:00Bye.
00:22:01Bye.
00:22:02Bye.
00:22:03Bye.
00:22:04Bye.
00:22:05Bye.
00:22:06Bye.
00:22:07Bye.
00:22:08Bye.
00:22:09Bye.
00:22:10Bye.
00:22:11Bye.
00:22:12Bye.
00:22:13Bye.
00:22:14Bye.
00:22:15Bye.
00:22:16Bye.
00:22:17Bye.
00:22:18Bye.
00:22:19Bye.
00:22:20Bye.
00:22:21Bye.
00:22:22Bye.
00:22:23Bye.
00:22:24Hey, Sue, uh, Sue, listen, buddy.
00:22:26You seriously just put me on hold?
00:22:28I came here to blow my brains out, and you're too fucking busy to stay on the phone with me?
00:22:32Okay.
00:22:33Hey, listen.
00:22:34Listen, listen.
00:22:35I'm sorry.
00:22:36I'm sorry that...
00:22:37You're right.
00:22:38That was wrong with me.
00:22:39I apologize.
00:22:40Whatever.
00:22:42It doesn't matter.
00:22:43I...
00:22:44It's happening no matter what, so...
00:22:47when you say it's happening you mean i mean i'm going to kill myself
00:22:54i've already decided
00:22:56but you haven't done it yet and that's a great thing i told myself midnight
00:23:03is there a reason that you gave yourself a time i don't know it helps when i have a goal i guess
00:23:13well you seem pretty determined
00:23:15did you get the gun for this purpose yeah it's either i use it on myself or on
00:23:24on who
00:23:27it doesn't matter
00:23:31too much of a coward to do that he always knew that about me i only call because i don't want to
00:23:39be alone when i do it instead this hotline was anonymous so i
00:23:43i figured if i told anyone else they'd call the cops well that's not going to happen with me but i
00:23:48gotta be honest with you this uh this worries me steve you're not going to call it though right
00:23:54just bring up one fucking siren no no i'm not going to call the cops i just want to keep talking to you okay that's it
00:24:00can we do that
00:24:02yeah okay as long as you know it won't matter
00:24:10we can't change what's happening
00:24:13what specifically do you feel like you can't change
00:24:17i i just mean generally i i feel like we all believe we're in control
00:24:25when we aren't
00:24:26so you feel powerless i don't feel i am i am fucking powerless that's why i know nothing matters
00:24:33i know people say that all the time but it's true it's like the only thing that's true
00:24:39that nothing matters we're all just talking to ourselves telling ourselves the same things
00:24:47over and over putting meaning into every little we're pretending to be people we aren't all of us
00:24:54acting like everything's perfect and normal
00:24:57and what i did
00:25:01what did you do
00:25:05i mean
00:25:10what i let happen
00:25:14good boy
00:25:16what did you let happen
00:25:22forget it
00:25:23stephen
00:25:27once i do this i'll be free
00:25:31i mean it's all insane
00:25:34and if the whole world is insane
00:25:37then why is it insane to want to end my life
00:25:41i think it would be tragic
00:25:44but insane
00:25:46i don't know
00:25:49you see there's part of me that can understand the feeling that the whole world is rigged against us
00:25:57right
00:25:59and no matter how hard we try life just keeps putting obstacles in our way
00:26:03sometimes worse sometimes
00:26:06things feel like they're so bad that it that it is too much for one person to take on
00:26:12alone at least
00:26:19but that's why you called in
00:26:21and i think that's great
00:26:25it's even
00:26:32you're still with me
00:26:36even Frank
00:26:43so
00:26:44we have to hear
00:26:49this has been so much for
00:26:51this right
00:26:52it's hard to understand
00:26:542
00:26:55kids
00:26:56kids
00:26:57kids
00:26:57kids
00:26:58kids
00:26:59kids
00:27:00kids
00:27:01kids
00:27:02um
00:27:03kids
00:27:04kids
00:27:05Hi, this is Vivian.
00:27:10Please leave a message.
00:27:12Hey, it's me.
00:27:14Just had a call that threw me for a loop.
00:27:18Give me a call when you get it.
00:27:20I love you.
00:27:28I'm so sorry.
00:27:29I know you're about to head out,
00:27:30but I need to run down to the restroom downstairs.
00:27:33Uh, can you cover for me for just a sec?
00:27:35Yeah, sure.
00:27:43Hello?
00:27:44Hi, it's Officer Fredericks.
00:27:46Oh, yeah.
00:27:47This is my cell.
00:27:48I just wanted to follow up.
00:27:49We arrested the victim's husband you called in about,
00:27:52uh, Jason.
00:27:53Oh, okay.
00:27:54And, uh, and how's Mary?
00:27:56She was worked up, for sure.
00:27:58And we had an ambulance take her to the hospital
00:28:00since her head was injured pretty bad.
00:28:02Oh, my goodness.
00:28:04But, hey.
00:28:05It's great you called.
00:28:07Who knows how bad things could have gotten
00:28:09if we hadn't showed up.
00:28:11Well, thank you.
00:28:12I'll give you a call this week,
00:28:14since we'll need a full statement.
00:28:16For sure.
00:28:17This is the best number to reach you at?
00:28:19Uh, yes, it is.
00:28:20Okay.
00:28:21You have a good rest of your night, sir.
00:28:23You, too.
00:28:24Happy New Year.
00:28:37Hey, there.
00:28:38I'm just gonna use your restroom really quick, all right?
00:28:40Key is on the desk, right there.
00:28:53You're gonna listen to me!
00:29:15You're gonna listen to me!
00:29:32What was that?
00:29:33Damn gunshot victim.
00:29:34Those doctors, there's a hospital nearby?
00:29:36Yeah, next door in the West Tower.
00:29:39Tell you, a bunch of strange happenings going on in this block.
00:29:43Man.
00:29:44You on eight, right?
00:29:46Yeah.
00:29:47Yeah, you'll probably see me around here later on.
00:29:49Graveyard shit for us, huh?
00:29:51Man, it gets lonely around here on New Year's Eve, I tell you.
00:29:55Yeah.
00:29:56But...
00:29:59I don't believe this.
00:30:00Is this happening upstairs, too?
00:30:02Yeah, there's something similar.
00:30:04Must have been from that earthquake earlier.
00:30:07We had one?
00:30:08Yeah, you didn't feel it?
00:30:09Must have missed it.
00:30:12Hey, thanks again.
00:30:13No problem.
00:30:14Happy to hear.
00:30:15You, too.
00:30:18Andrew!
00:30:21Hey, man.
00:30:22Sorry, I just got your message.
00:30:23Yeah, no worries.
00:30:24Yeah, it's crazy.
00:30:26It's almost midnight here.
00:30:27Uh, the boys somehow have more energy than me.
00:30:30Yeah, they look really big in the photos you sent.
00:30:33Yeah.
00:30:34Tell me about it.
00:30:35Hey, I, uh, I was meaning to call you earlier this week.
00:30:39You know, it's just, it's been a little...
00:30:41No, no, no.
00:30:42I get it.
00:30:43I get it.
00:30:44It's weird.
00:30:45Uh, I've been thinking about mom and dad recently.
00:30:50And, uh, I don't know.
00:30:52I don't know.
00:30:53It's, uh, it's like memories of them.
00:30:55They're fading, you know?
00:30:57Like, I can only remember them in bits and pieces now.
00:31:02Sorry, I, I don't know what I'm trying to say.
00:31:04No, I, I get it.
00:31:05It's the same for me.
00:31:06You know, it feels like it's easier to block things out most of the time.
00:31:11You know, I've been thinking about it too.
00:31:14I mean, how can we not on a night like tonight, you know?
00:31:17You remember that time when dad took mom on that trip and left us alone for the weekend?
00:31:24And didn't tell us where they were going or anything and they just left?
00:31:28Yeah.
00:31:29Yeah, I remember that.
00:31:45You said something to me.
00:31:47I've never forgotten.
00:31:49What if he kills her?
00:31:51I know they came back a few days later.
00:31:56She was okay.
00:31:57But yeah, I've been with me going so far away for college.
00:32:02We've never talked about it.
00:32:05But I could have done more.
00:32:09I know that.
00:32:10Hey, Steve.
00:32:11Hang on one sec.
00:32:12Honey?
00:32:13Boys.
00:32:14I'm sorry.
00:32:15We're closing in on midnight here.
00:32:16Yeah, no, I got a run too.
00:32:17I'm at work, so.
00:32:18Hey, but let's find a time to talk more.
00:32:19You know?
00:32:20When I'm not being used as a jungle gym.
00:32:22Yeah, for sure.
00:32:39Give me five minutes in the morning.
00:32:41I'll leave.
00:32:45We'll pour out some shit together.
00:32:50All right, and now we're gonna take a baby.
00:32:55Take a baby to take a baby.
00:33:02He dances.
00:33:08Hello.
00:33:11Steven, hi.
00:33:14It's, uh, Matt Chauvin's, a colleague of your wife's?
00:33:16Yeah.
00:33:17Hi, how are you?
00:33:19I'm good.
00:33:20I'm good.
00:33:21I'm good.
00:33:22Yourself?
00:33:23I'm great.
00:33:24Um, funny.
00:33:25I'm actually like a man.
00:33:26I'm a woman.
00:33:27I'm a woman.
00:33:28I'm a woman.
00:33:29I'm a woman.
00:33:30I'm a woman.
00:33:31I'm a woman.
00:33:32I'm a woman.
00:33:33I'm a woman.
00:33:34I'm a woman.
00:33:35I'm a woman.
00:33:36Funny.
00:33:37I'm actually looking at your Wikipedia page.
00:33:40No kidding.
00:33:43Yeah, I, uh, I heard that Vivian sent my, uh, draft to you.
00:33:48So sorry.
00:33:49I just didn't expect to hear from you so soon.
00:33:51Well, good writers seek out other good writers.
00:33:54Whenever they can.
00:33:55Hey, you're the professional.
00:33:56I'm just a wannabe.
00:33:57No, please.
00:33:58Don't sell yourself short.
00:34:00Well, I, uh, I'll admit, by the end of college,
00:34:03I was dead set on either being a, uh, psychologist or a sci-fi writer.
00:34:07So, you know.
00:34:08Oh, yeah?
00:34:09Yeah, yeah.
00:34:10It's gonna be one or the other.
00:34:23Hello?
00:34:24Uh...
00:34:25Uh...
00:34:26Uh, sorry.
00:34:28Did you, uh, did you feel that earthquake?
00:34:30No, no.
00:34:31It must have not hit us here in the valley.
00:34:34Are you all right?
00:34:35Uh, yeah.
00:34:37Yeah.
00:34:38All good.
00:34:40Good.
00:34:42So, I know it's New Year's Eve.
00:34:45I hope I'm not interrupting.
00:34:47No, not at the moment.
00:34:49Well, I had to call.
00:34:50Because, honestly, I'm reading this memoir and I'm on the edge of my seat.
00:34:55I couldn't put it down.
00:34:57Really?
00:34:58That, uh, that means a lot.
00:35:01Yeah, no, it's gripping stuff.
00:35:04I really can't wait to read the rest.
00:35:08Well, I figured it was more or less finished, page count-wise.
00:35:12Huh.
00:35:13So, I'm just gonna give you my personal opinion.
00:35:16You can take it, you can leave it, but...
00:35:18No, no, please.
00:35:19Uh, uh, I'd love the feedback.
00:35:22Well, it feels like you stopped short
00:35:25right as things with your father start heating up.
00:35:32I trust you.
00:35:36But the way you set everything up until this point,
00:35:39the father-son dynamic.
00:35:41Yeah, I just figured there was more to explore with that relationship.
00:35:45With my father, um, okay?
00:35:50Because I don't think I really got into our relationship
00:35:54until around chapter eight or so.
00:35:56Huh.
00:35:57Vivian must have sent me an earlier manuscript.
00:36:00This copy ends at chapter five.
00:36:02Uh...
00:36:04I actually have the latest draft emailed to myself,
00:36:08and I can forward that to you right now.
00:36:13Yeah, that'd be great.
00:36:20The writing is terrific.
00:36:22And your teenage years, I mean, phew.
00:36:25It's harrowing, honestly.
00:36:27Yeah, I just end up sticking to sci-fi and political thrillers.
00:36:31Maybe I'm too afraid of getting personal.
00:36:37Man, I'm sorry.
00:36:38I've got to call you right back.
00:36:40Oh, uh, okay.
00:36:41Let's, uh, let's talk later.
00:36:44Hey, Viv.
00:36:45Hey, sorry.
00:36:46I just got your message.
00:36:47It's all right.
00:36:48It's no problem.
00:36:49Have you talked to Jeff?
00:36:51Uh, yeah.
00:36:52I talked to him about an hour ago.
00:36:53He was, uh, still at the party.
00:36:55Why?
00:36:56He hasn't responded to my text.
00:36:59Really?
00:37:00I mean, I know he's just down the street,
00:37:02but I've been trying to check in.
00:37:03Oh, hang on.
00:37:04I just texted.
00:37:07He's saying I'll be home by 12.30 at the latest.
00:37:10You're great.
00:37:12And how was your party?
00:37:13Uh, I left early.
00:37:15I'm actually on the road now.
00:37:17That much fun, huh?
00:37:19No, it was fine.
00:37:20It was good to see Julia.
00:37:22She spent at least an hour telling embarrassing stories
00:37:24from when we were young.
00:37:26How was everything on your end?
00:37:27Your voicemail sounded...
00:37:29No, I think I just wanted to hear your voice.
00:37:32You know?
00:37:34Conversations tonight got me thinking.
00:37:37Yeah?
00:37:38Yeah.
00:37:39About what?
00:37:41Us.
00:37:42The past.
00:37:44Oh.
00:37:45Not the past.
00:37:47Yeah, that little old thing.
00:37:51You just think there's, uh...
00:37:54things I've forgotten, you know?
00:37:59Senior year of college.
00:38:01And, uh, maybe before.
00:38:05Tell me what you remember about us.
00:38:08About us?
00:38:09Wow.
00:38:11Yeah.
00:38:14Yeah, from the beginning.
00:38:16No, I hope you haven't forgotten that much.
00:38:20Nah, I'm just in a reflective moment.
00:38:23And I am writing a memoir.
00:38:25Supposedly, anyway.
00:38:27Yeah, that's true.
00:38:30So?
00:38:32Well...
00:38:33We first met in a psych class.
00:38:36But...
00:38:37I don't think we started dating until...
00:38:40Physics, I think.
00:38:42We ended up getting partnered together for a final.
00:38:45That paper we wrote.
00:38:47God, why do I always forget the name?
00:38:51The many worlds one.
00:38:53Yeah, yeah, that one.
00:38:55Which, by the way, I found that stashed at home earlier today.
00:38:59You kept that?
00:39:01Yeah.
00:39:02Yeah, probably just sentimental value, I guess.
00:39:05Yeah, I hadn't thought about that till today.
00:39:07Yeah.
00:39:08I don't know why I held onto it.
00:39:09I just...
00:39:11Felt like we got through some tough times that year, so...
00:39:15But...
00:39:17Yeah.
00:39:18That...
00:39:19That paper, it was way above our heads.
00:39:21We were trying to prove that parallel universes existed, or...
00:39:25Or something like that.
00:39:27I remember you had doubts.
00:39:29Yeah, that sounds like me.
00:39:31We got all philosophical that first night, working on the take-home.
00:39:37Debating whether life was deterministic.
00:39:41You had this relentless belief in free will.
00:39:45And that, among other things, is why I fell in love with you.
00:39:53What do you mean by we, um...
00:39:55We got through tough times that year?
00:39:57What?
00:40:00Well...
00:40:01You know...
00:40:03I mean...
00:40:04I don't even want to think about it now, but...
00:40:07What?
00:40:10No, it just...
00:40:11It's hard to think about how close things came to ending.
00:40:15What do you mean ending?
00:40:17Just us.
00:40:19Everything.
00:40:21The day in the car.
00:40:28It was a few weeks after you first told me about the scars.
00:40:33On your back.
00:40:36Where they really came from.
00:40:42Go get our room.
00:40:51You were so afraid to talk about it back then.
00:40:53Oh, no.
00:40:55I'm crying.
00:41:10I'm crying.
00:41:12Oh.
00:41:13I'm crying.
00:41:22Quiet, Stephen.
00:41:43The number you dialed is not a service.
00:41:51Hello?
00:41:52Jeff?
00:41:55Sorry, man, you got the wrong number.
00:41:57Come on, I know this is Jeff's number. I'm his father.
00:42:04Hey, you've reached Tyler. Leave a message.
00:42:43Let's go.
00:42:51Just go.
00:43:08Lifeline.
00:43:13It's me again.
00:43:16Stephen?
00:43:18Yeah.
00:43:21I'm glad you called back.
00:43:24You still in the motel?
00:43:26Yeah.
00:43:27Do you believe in the afterlife?
00:43:34Well, um, I'm not religious, so in that sense, no.
00:43:42You know, as a kid, the idea of the afterlife scared me.
00:43:46Even reincarnation.
00:43:52What do you think?
00:43:53It's like that Greek myth of Sisyphus, you know that one?
00:43:59Yeah, I do.
00:43:59The guy that pushes the rock up the hill over and over.
00:44:04Sometimes I think that's all life is.
00:44:07These endless cycles of pain that we all just accept.
00:44:09I wanted to know that when we die, that it's just over.
00:44:14Just blackness, no more consciousness, no more pain.
00:44:17And that's something you find comforting?
00:44:25Finality.
00:44:26Yeah.
00:44:28I hate the idea that there could be two possible outcomes.
00:44:33Death just feels like it should be so definitive.
00:44:37Like it's the one thing you can't cheat.
00:44:42Well, I told you I don't think it's an insane thought to contemplate death or even think about taking your own life, but...
00:44:51I think with what you have going on, Stephen, that this is...
00:44:55Stop.
00:44:57Stop what?
00:44:58Just get it...
00:44:59Get it through your fucking head that you're not going to talk me down.
00:45:02I'm not...
00:45:03I'm not calling you to be fucking saved.
00:45:05You should treat this like it's already happened.
00:45:10What's already happened?
00:45:11Yeah, because there's no stopping it.
00:45:13I'm killing myself at midnight, like I said.
00:45:21But I agree, obviously, that...
00:45:24It's not insane to think about it.
00:45:26It's insane if you don't think about killing yourself.
00:45:28Honestly, I think everyone...
00:45:32Every person on...
00:45:34On Earth is just doing therapy with themselves.
00:45:37Constantly.
00:45:39I mean...
00:45:39One part of our brain telling another part not to kill ourselves.
00:45:45That...
00:45:46There's some reason to keep...
00:45:48That's an interesting way of looking at life.
00:45:50Maybe a little cynical, but I think it makes sense.
00:45:54I don't know.
00:45:55It's so weird that I'm even telling us.
00:45:58What, calling in tonight?
00:46:01Yeah.
00:46:04I've always hated talking about myself to other people.
00:46:06Especially when I'm in a bad place.
00:46:09Well, I'm happy that you did, because I'm a big believer...
00:46:12In talking things out.
00:46:14I think it helps.
00:46:15You know, when I was younger, I think it was a lot like you.
00:46:19And I didn't talk about anything.
00:46:24Even my first girlfriend in college, I never told her anything personal.
00:46:28I was never vulnerable.
00:46:31If you can't talk to me, then...
00:46:34Then I can't do this anymore.
00:46:37Then go.
00:46:40Steven.
00:46:41Just go.
00:46:41You know, I've taken a few psych classes, so you don't have to bullshit me.
00:46:48I'm not.
00:46:50Yeah, you're just trying to bond with me.
00:46:51I know how it works.
00:46:53I'm sure it came across that way, but...
00:46:56I do believe I can relate to what you're saying.
00:47:00How do you do it?
00:47:02Do what?
00:47:05I don't know.
00:47:06Stay optimistic while taking calls from people like me.
00:47:09I mean, when you go home, what?
00:47:12You just shut it off and forget about it?
00:47:16I wish it was that easy.
00:47:18So what?
00:47:18You get high or something?
00:47:21No.
00:47:26Well, I have, uh...
00:47:27I have been known to finish off a bottle of wine when I get home from time to time.
00:47:31But, um...
00:47:34I'm lucky to have people in my life I can rely on.
00:47:41Yeah.
00:47:43That's the thing about luck.
00:47:44No one wants to talk about it.
00:47:47You really feel like you...
00:47:48don't have anyone you can rely on?
00:47:51You're not after what you've done to me.
00:48:04You're father?
00:48:11Mike!
00:48:12You never, ever...
00:48:14Sorry, I'll listen.
00:48:15Mom!
00:48:16Mom!
00:48:17You're going to listen now?
00:48:19Oh, my...
00:48:19Oh, my...
00:48:20Huh?
00:48:21Please, please.
00:48:23Please.
00:48:29You're a girlfriend.
00:48:31Tell me more about her.
00:48:36Vivian's her name, you said, right?
00:48:40Yeah.
00:48:41I'm...
00:48:44We've been dating since we were sophomores, so a couple of years.
00:48:49I always thought she was out of my league.
00:48:53I was surprised when she asked me out.
00:48:58I know you said that you guys had a fight.
00:49:02But she seems like someone you've confided in before.
00:49:07Or trusted.
00:49:09I told you.
00:49:13I can't trust anyone.
00:49:18Not after what he's done to me.
00:49:39Are you a father?
00:49:43I am, yeah.
00:49:48You seem like you'd be a good one.
00:49:51I feel like that's rare.
00:49:57Can we talk about your dad for a minute?
00:50:04Because he seems like a pretty hard guy to have for a parent.
00:50:11You could say that.
00:50:14Did he abuse you?
00:50:20Yeah.
00:50:24But he always disguised as love.
00:50:30He's always with me.
00:50:35His voice.
00:50:37I hear it.
00:50:41Even now.
00:50:43I feel him hovering over me all the time.
00:50:47Like...
00:50:48One day he's telling me how proud he is of me.
00:50:51And...
00:50:55In what?
00:51:02Fuck it.
00:51:04It doesn't matter.
00:51:05No, it does.
00:51:06It does matter.
00:51:07What were you gonna say?
00:51:09Nothing.
00:51:10Steven.
00:51:15Steven, can we push back this deadline that you've set?
00:51:18Can we do that?
00:51:22No.
00:51:24I can't...
00:51:25I can't just let him eat away at me, little pilot.
00:51:28Then let's talk about that a little bit more.
00:51:30No, I...
00:51:31I can't fucking think straight.
00:51:33I just...
00:51:34I just want you to fucking talk about something else, okay?
00:51:35All right, then...
00:51:36All right, I'm sorry.
00:51:37Then let's talk about something else.
00:51:38We can talk about whatever you want.
00:51:40Okay?
00:51:43But there's one thing that I need to know, Steven.
00:51:50Do you have the gun in your hand right now?
00:51:53Hey, Steven.
00:51:54I know that you're all alone in a motel.
00:52:05This is Officer Fredericks.
00:52:18Hey, Steven.
00:52:19I know that you're all alone in a motel.
00:52:23And you're sounding really depressed.
00:52:26And you told me that you have a gun.
00:52:28I know that you're in the Red Palm Motel.
00:52:36I didn't tell you that.
00:52:38Yes, you did.
00:52:39How did you...
00:52:40You told me that.
00:52:41You told me where you...
00:52:41I just forgot the room.
00:52:43No, I didn't.
00:52:43I just forgot the room.
00:52:44Just tell me the room.
00:52:45I didn't tell you my room number either.
00:52:48Steven, I don't want you to die.
00:52:49Can you just tell me where you are, please?
00:52:54Just so I know.
00:52:55But it's room 15, all right?
00:53:08But I told you if you call the cops...
00:53:10I know.
00:53:11I know.
00:53:11If you hear any signs, you're going to kill yourself.
00:53:13And I don't want that, Steven.
00:53:18But I was thinking.
00:53:21What if I came?
00:53:22Not the cops, just me.
00:53:26It'll take me a little bit to drive out there,
00:53:28but I can be there.
00:53:29No, no, no.
00:53:30There's no time.
00:53:31Just stop, okay?
00:53:32Okay, okay.
00:53:33Then just...
00:53:34It's important for me to know where you are, okay?
00:53:37And I'm just confirming.
00:53:38You said the Red Palm Motel, room 15, correct?
00:53:41What?
00:53:42Why do you keep asking?
00:53:43I said it doesn't matter.
00:53:44I'm sorry.
00:53:44You're right.
00:53:45I won't ask again, okay?
00:53:46Okay?
00:53:46Tell me a story.
00:54:06A story.
00:54:15One from when you were a kid.
00:54:19That's the only good memory I have of my dad.
00:54:23He'd read to me when I was little.
00:54:27He really enjoyed that for some reason.
00:54:34Steven.
00:54:34Steven.
00:54:36I have to do it.
00:54:40I'm sorry.
00:54:41No, no.
00:54:42Hold on.
00:54:43Hold on.
00:54:43I know it's really hard right now,
00:54:44but I need you to stick with me
00:54:45for just a little longer, okay?
00:54:48Because I really think that I fully understand
00:54:50what you're going through.
00:54:51You couldn't.
00:54:52No, I do.
00:54:53No.
00:54:54No.
00:54:55I do.
00:54:59Your father.
00:55:02I know.
00:55:03I know everything.
00:55:08Your mother.
00:55:08I know her, too.
00:55:11What?
00:55:20I know what happened to her
00:55:21and how you blame yourself.
00:55:23I don't...
00:55:24How do you...
00:55:25I just know Steven.
00:55:28No, you can't.
00:55:32You can't know him, that's it.
00:55:34He...
00:55:34He covered it up and he forced you to lie.
00:55:42I'm going to have to tell the police what happened.
00:55:48I trust you.
00:55:49And then when she was gone
00:55:52and your brother went away to college,
00:55:54he turned to you.
00:55:58He started hurting you.
00:56:00He made you powerless, but you're not, Steven.
00:56:03Yes, I am.
00:56:04I told you, we all are.
00:56:06It's not your fault.
00:56:06You did everything you could to protect your mom,
00:56:09especially for being a kid.
00:56:10And everything your father did to you.
00:56:26I know the effects it had on you.
00:56:33We can protect you from him.
00:56:38We can fix this without...
00:56:40You don't have to do this, Steven.
00:56:43How do you know all this about me?
00:56:45I know it's strange.
00:56:47I know it's strange.
00:56:49But I'm here to tell you there's hope.
00:56:51And no matter how bad you're feeling right now,
00:56:52those feelings, they're survivable.
00:56:55And I know that because I've seen it, Steven.
00:56:58I've seen it.
00:57:01I can't.
00:57:04I can't.
00:57:06Yeah, you can't.
00:57:06I'm sorry.
00:57:07No.
00:57:08Just stay with me.
00:57:10It's easy.
00:57:10Just stay.
00:57:15Steven, are you here?
00:57:20I have to.
00:57:22No, you don't.
00:57:22I'm sorry.
00:57:23Because you have a future.
00:57:25I promise you.
00:57:26I promise you that there's a future with people who love you.
00:57:29I promise you, Steven, these people...
00:57:31I promise you...
00:57:56I was afraid that there's a future with people.
00:57:58Oh my God.
00:57:58Hello?
00:58:04Hi, yeah.
00:58:06Hey, just wanted to stay on the line to confirm.
00:58:09You've got a potential suicide victim at the Red Palm,
00:58:11is what it sounded like.
00:58:13Room 15, right?
00:58:15Yes, room 15, but hurry, I think it's...
00:58:18I'm already on my way.
00:58:20I'm only a minute out, so I'll call you back.
00:58:28What?
00:58:55Marcy?
00:58:58Hello?
00:59:01Yeah, hi.
00:59:02So, nothing here at the Red Palm.
00:59:05Actually, the hotel manager says no one's checked in at all tonight.
00:59:09What?
00:59:10But, uh, sort of a weird thing.
00:59:12I found a bullet hole in the wall of the bathroom in room 15.
00:59:15You did?
00:59:16Yeah, I mean, I can't tell if that's what it is for sure or how recent it is, but it looks old. I had to guess.
00:59:30Um...
00:59:31Well, uh, thank you for your help.
00:59:35I...
00:59:36I guess...
00:59:37I don't...
00:59:42I got my kids.
00:59:43That's right.
00:59:45And...
00:59:46Could you do this?
00:59:47I have a question.
00:59:47I'm gonna...
00:59:48I wanna get a...
00:59:49I wanna get a...
00:59:50I need a...
00:59:51but...
00:59:52I'm gonna...
00:59:53You...
00:59:54I can't...
00:59:55Yeah, you...
00:59:56I need a nap.
00:59:57Something...
00:59:58I need a nap.
00:59:59You need a nap.
01:00:00I want to heaven, man.
01:00:01You need a nap.
01:00:02You need a nap.
01:00:04You need a nap.
01:00:05Hey!
01:00:35Hello? Hello?
01:00:53Hello?
01:01:00Hey! You're not authorized to be on this floor, are you?
01:01:15No, I, uh...
01:01:16Come on, man. I like you. I don't want to have to report you.
01:01:30There's something going on in that lab.
01:01:34Looked pretty dead to me.
01:01:44It ain't right.
01:01:45Yeah. You said there's a hospital in the West Tower?
01:01:48Mm-hmm.
01:01:50What's the name of it?
01:01:53Not a key.
01:02:23Hello?
01:02:36Hey, uh, I'm so sorry.
01:02:40I just realized my sister and her friend, they prank called this number earlier tonight,
01:02:45and when I realized it was...
01:02:47Julia, no. Come on, you said you'd apologize.
01:02:50Julia!
01:02:51I...
01:02:52Wait, your sister's named Julia?
01:02:54Your younger sister?
01:02:56Yeah, she's... sorry. You know, she's a little young.
01:02:59And you're Vivian?
01:03:02Yeah. How did you know that?
01:03:06It's January 1st, 2009, where you're at, right?
01:03:11Just past midnight.
01:03:13Y-yeah.
01:03:15I need to tell you something about Stephen Thomas.
01:03:18Do you know Stephen?
01:03:20Yeah, it's a long story, but listen.
01:03:22Right now, I need you to go to, uh...
01:03:26St. Jude's Hospital in Palm Springs, okay?
01:03:29Do you have a car?
01:03:31Uh, yeah. But what's going on?
01:03:35Stephen tried to kill himself tonight.
01:03:39And I don't know if he's gonna make it.
01:03:41Uh, uh...
01:03:42Okay?
01:03:43Okay.
01:03:44Okay, I'm, uh, I'm, I'm...
01:03:46I'm going now.
01:03:47Um, wait.
01:03:48Are you the person he said he talked to earlier tonight?
01:03:51I don't know. Did he, uh...
01:03:53He said he tried calling someone, but that he kept hanging up.
01:03:56He wasn't really making sense, but, um...
01:03:59Anyway, whoever you are, thank you.
01:04:12He tried to call.
01:04:16May gosh.
01:04:18I have noadoop.
01:04:19What's your mind?
01:04:20One, two, three.
01:04:22Why's he hiding it?
01:04:23Y-yeah like I don't know him?
01:04:24Yeah, he's hiding it.
01:04:25I don't know how I'm doing.
01:04:26And I remember this.
01:04:27No, he's not just saying he thinks he didn't lose it.
01:04:30Alright, look good.
01:04:31I don't know.
01:04:32Guys, we're gonna lose it.
01:04:33I don't know!
01:04:35I don't know, so.
01:04:37I don't know.
01:05:07I don't know.
01:05:37I don't know.
01:06:07I don't know.
01:06:37I don't know.
01:07:07I don't know.
01:07:09Lifeline?
01:07:12Can I get your name?
01:07:15Steven.
01:07:16I don't want to talk about myself.
01:07:18I don't know.
01:07:25I don't know.
01:07:25I don't know.
01:07:26Maybe you can just talk about yourself or something.
01:07:30Okay, I understand. Sure. Well, my name's Steven, too, actually. That's Steven Jefferson. And your last name is?
01:07:40Thomas.
01:07:42Gotcha. Well, that's funny. Both of our names together make up one whole former president.
01:07:51Sorry, I only tell bad jokes.
01:08:00Do you have a family?
01:08:09I do, yeah. I have a wife and a son. My son's about to turn 14 next month, actually.
01:08:18And he's a big Lakers fan. My wife thinks he has a girlfriend, but he's too shy to talk to me about that stuff.
01:08:30And so recently, I've only been volunteering a few times a year, ever since I went into private practice.
01:08:38And I was told that writing a memoir would be a good therapeutic exercise.
01:08:44So, I'm about five chapters deep in right now.
01:08:47I'm about five chapters deep in right now.
01:09:04So, I love you.
01:09:08I don't know.
01:09:38Tell me a story.
01:10:08I don't know.
01:10:38I can't take any more of these seizures.
01:10:57Let's induce hypothermia again to reduce the brain swelling.
01:11:06Clear.
01:11:06I don't know.
01:11:13Here's her.
01:11:14Do you ever see a future between us?
01:11:26Steven.
01:11:34Steven.
01:11:35Just go.
01:11:36I'm alive.
01:11:49I'm alive.
01:11:51Okay.
01:11:52Stay with us, Steven.
01:11:54We're losing them.
01:11:57Clear.
01:11:58I'm alive.
01:12:10I'm alive.
01:12:12I'm alive.
01:12:14I'm alive.
01:12:16I'm alive.
01:12:17I'm alive.
01:12:18I'm alive.
01:12:22I'm alive.
01:12:23I'm alive.
01:12:32I'm alive.
01:12:33You know, his odds aren't good.
01:12:42And even if he does make it.
01:12:51I, I can't stand to see him like this.
01:12:54I need to go on a walk.
01:12:55Andrew.
01:12:57I'm sorry.
01:13:03Hi, Mary.
01:13:28How you doing?
01:13:29Okay, I guess.
01:13:31So your concussion symptoms were pretty mild,
01:13:33but we're still going to want to keep you overnight, okay?
01:13:36Also, there's a detective here
01:13:37that would like to speak with you.
01:13:47Mary, hi.
01:13:48I'm Detective Fredericks with the Palm Springs Police.
01:13:52I'd like to get more background
01:13:54about your husband, Jason.
01:13:59Yeah, that's fine.
01:14:00Thanks.
01:14:01Hey, Loretta.
01:14:04Hello?
01:14:05Dr. Williams.
01:14:06No, I, I can't.
01:14:07I can't get a sitter that fast.
01:14:08Dr. Williams, I'm sorry.
01:14:09It's really urgent.
01:14:09Come on.
01:14:10You're just not telling me this.
01:14:12I just have to show you one thing.
01:14:13I gotta call you back.
01:14:14It's just going to be really quick.
01:14:15Right, so patient.
01:14:16It's just like...
01:14:17Yeah.
01:14:18I'm sorry.
01:14:20I'm sorry.
01:14:21No, but I'm sorry.
01:14:28Oh, no.
01:14:32Can you or me?
01:14:33Well, no.
01:14:34I'm sorry.
01:14:35I'm sorry.
01:14:35What's great.
01:14:36Oh, no.
01:14:37Hey, you're okay.
01:14:38Can you?
01:14:38Yeah.
01:14:39Hey, you're alright.
01:14:40I love you.
01:14:40I love you.
01:14:41I love you.
01:14:41I love you too.
01:14:42I love you too.
01:14:43No, you're ok.
01:15:13They told me it's not likely you'll wake up.
01:15:33I don't believe it.
01:15:35I know you.
01:15:38When you do, we're gonna talk more, okay?
01:15:42We're not gonna hide things.
01:15:48I'm scared, though, Stephen.
01:15:52But I'm still here.
01:15:55And so are you.
01:15:56I'm still here.
01:16:26I'm still here.
01:16:34I'm still here.