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00:00:00Little Abner, whoo-hoo, little Abner, whoo-hoo, every gal in town is after little Abner, poor Abner, he's a superman at women, he'll give any man a-trimmin', but when it comes to kissin' pretty women, little Abner go, go, go, Daisy may pursue him, he always runs away.
00:00:26Daisy holler, whoa, but you ought to see him go on, say hawk and day, little Abner, whoo-hoo, little Abner, whoo-hoo, he's the biggest catch in dogpatch, little Abner, little Abner, he's the handsome and the dashing, gal can't stop their mashing, but when they whisper, what's your secret passion?
00:00:56Daisy may, come on, Daisy may, it's gettin' up time, mornin', granny, it's after sunup, don't forget, you gotta get yourself all puttied up, because your cousin's a lighthouse coming over from Pineapple Junction today, I'll remember, granny.
00:01:24Hee!
00:01:24Hee!
00:01:25Hi-ho!
00:01:26There's that lonesome polecat a-messin' lamp.
00:01:31Him and that Harless Joe are two of the most rustling bachelors of the years.
00:01:36Well, stir yourself down.
00:01:40Hee!
00:01:42Hoor!
00:01:44Hee!
00:01:46Hee!
00:01:47Hee!
00:01:48Joe!
00:01:50Joe?
00:01:50Harless Joe?
00:01:51Joke?
00:01:52Harvest Joke?
00:01:53What you want, Greenish Greg?
00:01:58Tell that no-town fool cat to stop making them crazy noises and get me a bucket of water.
00:02:04And you'll fetch me up some cooking water.
00:02:07What's left batting?
00:02:09What you doing here, fool cat?
00:02:20Call great spirit.
00:02:21Make them fire like Ancestor.
00:02:24Maybe Ancestor didn't tell secrets.
00:02:28Here, get some water for Granny.
00:02:31I'll get the kindling.
00:02:33Where's the ass?
00:02:35Me trade him to Mary and Sam for fireboxes.
00:02:40Why don't you light it?
00:02:43Firebox no good.
00:02:50No.
00:02:51Where's the end?
00:02:52If the end of the window is hot, you can't be too hot.
00:02:53You can't go there.
00:02:54Let me do it.
00:02:55I love you.
00:02:56I don't care if you're...
00:02:57I'm not.
00:02:58I'm not.
00:02:59I'm not.
00:03:00I don't care if I'm going to work.
00:03:02You're a little bit.
00:03:03I'll be fine.
00:03:04Be careful.
00:03:05I'm not.
00:03:06I'm not.
00:03:07I'm not.
00:03:08I'm not.
00:03:09You're not.
00:03:10You're not.
00:03:11I'm not.
00:03:12I'm not.
00:03:13You're not.
00:03:14I'm not.
00:03:15I'm not.
00:03:16It's a pity you ain't married, so we wouldn't be putting up with them wasteless critters to get a little work done.
00:03:25But, Granny, I told you...
00:03:26Look at you.
00:03:27There you stand with the best years of your life behind you.
00:03:30And there you're hiding the hair of a husband as you got.
00:03:34But I ain't interested in men, just any men, folks.
00:03:37I love the madness.
00:03:39Pretty soon the men, folks, ain't even going to look at you.
00:03:41They desire his youngness.
00:03:44Gals with smoke.
00:03:47I don't care.
00:03:49It's only a little...
00:03:50Gals, you would, Granny.
00:03:53Well, it's about time.
00:03:58You want to come, sir?
00:04:05You clumsy idiot.
00:04:07You're trying to knock over our poor little house?
00:04:12I only brung a handful, Granny,
00:04:14and you told me to pile it close to the cabin.
00:04:17I'll stop.
00:04:18Help.
00:04:19Take them water.
00:04:21I can't do so anymore.
00:04:24I want to get my house out.
00:04:25I'll...
00:04:26I'll...
00:04:27It's Granny.
00:04:35Well, can me, Brown.
00:04:44Oh, he can't help it.
00:04:46He's stupid.
00:04:48He sure is.
00:04:50And so are you.
00:04:51Hey, a big lummit.
00:04:53Oh, there'll be the death of me yet.
00:04:56Oh, if Daisy may could only get that little Abner.
00:04:59Is he very hungry this morning, son?
00:05:10Not ravenous, Mammy.
00:05:11Just kind of.
00:05:12Well, in that case,
00:05:14I'll only put on
00:05:15just a few more.
00:05:23Is he up, Pappy?
00:05:24Pappy, is he up?
00:05:34He's sure to climb up pace.
00:05:40I'm coming, Pandy.
00:05:43Either way, I'm coming.
00:05:45Here, son.
00:05:47Sit yourself.
00:05:48I sure ain't hungry.
00:06:00Someday, I ain't gonna wake you up for breakfast.
00:06:03And you're gonna sleep right through all your deals.
00:06:05Oh, what a happy day.
00:06:07I reckons we have the finest food in all the world.
00:06:10Polk chops and eggs for breakfast.
00:06:12Polk chops and goobers for lunch.
00:06:13And for supper, more polk chops.
00:06:16Even though this ain't Sunday,
00:06:18we might be...
00:06:18Now, don't you start getting your mouth
00:06:20set for them preserved tornums,
00:06:22lucifer ornamental locum.
00:06:25Little Abner's taking them to the store
00:06:27directly at the breakfast.
00:06:36See if you can make out this print.
00:06:41What do you make of it?
00:06:42Nothing.
00:06:44Good for fire.
00:06:45No, no.
00:06:46Readin'.
00:06:47Howdy, fellas.
00:06:49Howdy, little Abner.
00:06:51Him read printin'?
00:06:52Sure does.
00:06:53I can read writin' and readin', too.
00:06:55Oh, you's the most intelligent young gentleman in Dovebatch.
00:06:59I reckon I is.
00:07:00What him say?
00:07:01Among the...
00:07:02among the...
00:07:09the...
00:07:10stink-wish...
00:07:12visitors...
00:07:13Where, tickle-my-bones!
00:07:16That certainly do sound perry.
00:07:19We'll be...
00:07:21Dr. James A. Fogba, the celibrated...
00:07:34Printing's all mixed up, sure. I reckon I'd better study it out.
00:07:39T-S-Y-C-H...
00:07:45What's that?
00:07:46Maybe it's a woodpecker.
00:07:51Maybe it's skunk hollers.
00:08:02Why, it's Cicero Gruntz.
00:08:05It's your little Abner.
00:08:07What are you doing here, boy?
00:08:09Oh, nothing. Just hanging these up for the sheriff.
00:08:12Don't you tell nobody you saw me with these papers.
00:08:15Go fetch yourself, Cicero Gruntz. We won't.
00:08:18What did he say?
00:08:22$25 reward for Earthquake Magoon.
00:08:26Date or a lie.
00:08:28Better date.
00:08:29For Robin, the first state bank of Jonesville.
00:08:33The sheriff.
00:08:39And you would really say $25? Cash? Money?
00:08:42That's what it's saying.
00:08:44Oh, that sheriff must think we all idiots.
00:08:48They ain't that much money in the whole of Tarnation.
00:08:52Oh, shit. What's the use of talking?
00:08:54Anyone knows you can't go with a skunk holler and come out alive.
00:08:59So our guess is Magoon's safe.
00:09:01Hey, didn't I told you that paper ain't meant for making fire?
00:09:06Yeah.
00:09:07You keep it, little Abner.
00:09:08Maybe you can read again for us.
00:09:09I'll be glad to.
00:09:10Well, I gotta get it going.
00:09:11So long.
00:09:12So long.
00:09:13So long.
00:09:14So long.
00:09:15So long.
00:09:19$25.
00:09:26Twenty-five dollars.
00:09:34Come on, come on, come on.
00:09:39Yo-wee!
00:09:43Me make them fire. Ancestor, very clever people.
00:09:59Do you have any idea?
00:10:01Do you have any idea?
00:10:11Are you all right?
00:10:13One is, Danny Stacked.
00:10:18Delightful?
00:10:20Every time you come to visit and you just have messes of boys hanging around.
00:10:25Messes is right.
00:10:27Oh, that's too bad.
00:10:29She's welcome to any of these.
00:10:31I don't think she'd be interested.
00:10:33She's prom-sought on just one boy.
00:10:35Where is she?
00:10:37Down long, chasing after that little Abner.
00:10:41You mean that big, handsome boy?
00:10:43Mm-hmm.
00:10:47I think I'll go down and look up first.
00:10:51I'll go down and look up first.
00:10:53Daisy Mae.
00:10:55That's all, boys.
00:11:01Lovely.
00:11:03That's what he is.
00:11:05Just plain lovely.
00:11:09That's what he is.
00:11:11Just plain lovely.
00:11:15That's what he is.
00:11:17Just plain lovely.
00:11:19Just plain lovely.
00:11:29Little Abner, you.
00:11:31The same.
00:11:33Is she going north to Pineapple Junction?
00:11:35No.
00:11:36Is she maybe headed south for Sweet Patootty Corner?
00:11:38No.
00:11:39Why is she headed for, little Abner?
00:11:41I'm headed for Sotar to Johnstall.
00:11:43Well, I will ask for and receive.
00:11:45Five pounds of boiled ham.
00:11:47One spoon of thread double ten white.
00:11:49One can of Pineapple.
00:11:50Two pounds of cheese.
00:11:51Half soles for Papi's boots.
00:11:53One large jar of Sweet Patootty.
00:11:55One large jar of sour pickle.
00:11:57One bottle of catsup.
00:11:58One bottle of mustard.
00:11:59One can of pea potter for salome.
00:12:01Two twists of pipe tobacco for my mammy.
00:12:03That, ah, turns on my heel.
00:12:05Makes a beeline for home.
00:12:07What a pico yako incident.
00:12:09I'll finish us off on a Johnstall likewise.
00:12:11And likewise, I'm going to turn on my heel
00:12:13and make a beeline back row.
00:12:15Oh.
00:12:17There's no reason why we can't walk together, is there?
00:12:21Ain't no log, Gennett.
00:12:23There's no log, Gennett.
00:12:25There's no log.
00:12:27There's no log.
00:12:29There's no log.
00:12:31There's no log.
00:12:33There's no log.
00:12:35There's no log.
00:12:45Oh, my ankle.
00:12:47Help!
00:12:49I twisted my ankle.
00:12:51Oh, shacks.
00:12:58I reckon I must have stepped on a loose rock.
00:13:01Oh!
00:13:03I guess I can't walk unless I have someone strong to hold on to.
00:13:07Wait hard, I'll see if there's someone strong around.
00:13:10Yours strong and yours around.
00:13:17I suppose now does have to.
00:13:19There's nothing romanical about it.
00:13:21We both understand that, don't we?
00:13:24Yes, little Abner.
00:13:26Give me your arm.
00:13:28Let's go.
00:13:31What a party flower.
00:13:34Oh!
00:13:47You always find me.
00:13:48Smell it, little Abner.
00:13:50Uh-huh.
00:13:52Love is what little Abner is in out with Daisy Mae.
00:13:55That's a lie.
00:13:57Oh!
00:13:58Walking arm and arm with your heads close together.
00:14:01I smell the flower.
00:14:02Worst case love I ever see.
00:14:04Ah, hates love.
00:14:05What's about her to be a love, Bob?
00:14:07She's only got golden yellow hair.
00:14:09No more golden yellow than the summer sun.
00:14:11Her eyes are...
00:14:13I'm sorry.
00:14:14I'm sorry.
00:14:15I'm sorry.
00:14:16I'm sorry.
00:14:17I'm sorry.
00:14:18I'm sorry.
00:14:19I'm sorry.
00:14:20I'm sorry.
00:14:21She's more golden yellow than the summer sun.
00:14:23Her eyes are only as blue as the sky.
00:14:25The teeth are no more white or shinier than furrows.
00:14:28It's for her cheeks.
00:14:30I can show you plenty of features which is almost as soft and pink and white.
00:14:36The old thinks love is what I is in of with her.
00:14:39You take that back!
00:14:41Little, little Abner, you always write.
00:14:44She is just a ordinary, yellow-eyed, blue-eyed, pinky-cheeked gal.
00:14:48Just like you say.
00:14:49Anybody would be a fool to be in love with her.
00:14:51Yes, sir.
00:14:52An awful fool.
00:14:57Oh, it wasn't for you about me.
00:15:01On account of what you done said about Daisy May.
00:15:03Oh, I said it was what you said.
00:15:05She wrecked.
00:15:06Only you said as if you meant it.
00:15:11Wait for me, Abner.
00:15:14I'll walk by myself, thank you.
00:15:16You're always getting me talked about.
00:15:25Oh, gosh!
00:15:31Daisy May.
00:15:32I'm sure a powerful glad to see you.
00:15:34Same here, delightful.
00:15:36What for?
00:15:37You let him get away.
00:15:38I couldn't have it.
00:15:39I loved him so.
00:15:41What can be wrong?
00:15:43Maybe you need a new technique.
00:15:45Technique?
00:15:46What's that?
00:15:47Oh, that's what you gotta have to get him.
00:15:50Let's see.
00:15:51He's the tall, dark, and ignorant side.
00:15:56A boy like him requires only the crudest technique.
00:16:00It's the, uh...
00:16:01Yoo-hoo.
00:16:02Less woo.
00:16:03Then do as your conscience tells you.
00:16:04Technique.
00:16:05Sure wish I had some.
00:16:06I'll show you how it's done.
00:16:07Will you?
00:16:08Nothing to it.
00:16:09Hello, little Abner.
00:16:10Howdy, Mr. Old-timer.
00:16:11Look at her.
00:16:12You see the most humorous looking gal you ever see.
00:16:14Look at the bugle on her.
00:16:19Boys...
00:16:33Boys...
00:16:36You're all too young and innocent to know what you're laughing at.
00:16:38What do you mean I'm not a bad stranger in a grave...
00:16:40You're all too young and innocent to know what you're laughing at.
00:16:41What do you mean, old-timer?
00:16:43What did Sadie Hawkins say?
00:16:45A long time ago, this guy, Sadie Hawkins...
00:16:48Right here in Dogpatch.
00:16:49For years, she tried to catch herself a husband.
00:16:52Didn't have no luck.
00:16:54Finally, her pappy, who was the mayor,
00:16:56called all the bachelors of Dogpatch together,
00:16:59pulled out his gun and says,
00:17:01I declare today Sadie Hawkins' day.
00:17:04When I fire my gun, y'all can begin a running.
00:17:07After you've got a fair start, Sadie will take out.
00:17:10And the man she catches is going to be her husband.
00:17:13That's how it started.
00:17:14Now, every year, when Sadie Hawkins' day rolls around,
00:17:18life ain't safe for any male critter in Dogpatch.
00:17:21Now, did you get the idea?
00:17:23I'll never be able to understand pet news.
00:17:27Little Abner.
00:17:35As a special favor to you, I'll contact you, little Abner.
00:17:38You'll go hide and watch me work my technique.
00:17:40You know?
00:17:41But you've got a promise to take him off my hands.
00:17:44After he falls madly in love of me.
00:17:46I'll be so glad to take him off in your hands.
00:17:49Go on, get it.
00:18:08What happened?
00:18:12He's even more ignorant than I thought.
00:18:15I've got to use a cruder technique.
00:18:20Sorry, little Abner.
00:18:21Morning, Barney Bargreaves.
00:18:22Nice morning.
00:18:23Sure is.
00:18:24Help!
00:18:33Help!
00:18:34Don't you dare try to kiss me again, you big, sloppy beast!
00:18:37Help!
00:18:38Will no one defend the poor girl from such a beast?
00:18:43I'll protect you from the big, sloppy beast, ma'am.
00:18:45Name a little Abner Yoakam.
00:18:47Don't worry, ma'am.
00:18:48He'll fall in just a minute.
00:18:49I'll give my dog Pat's lullaby, which my mammy teached me.
00:18:54They always act like that at first.
00:18:57They always act like that at first.
00:19:12Oh!
00:19:13Oh, thank you, sir.
00:19:14You saved me.
00:19:17Why does he reckon he wanted to kiss me?
00:19:22Dr. Vaughn knows him.
00:19:24I can't see no reason for it myself.
00:19:26You can't.
00:19:28I don't know why any intelligent man would want to go kissing a gal.
00:19:31Well, it ain't the kissing our minds.
00:19:33It's a trouble that starts.
00:19:34You kiss a girl, and what happens?
00:19:35She gets romantic because she wants more.
00:19:37She follows you day and night, and finally your brain weakens,
00:19:40and you marries her.
00:19:41She has lots of children.
00:19:43Gets old and gray, worrying about them.
00:19:45So your children marries and has children,
00:19:47and then you not only got to worry about your children,
00:19:49but about your grandchildren.
00:19:50Your grandchildren has children, and by that time,
00:19:53you have the misery and the rheumatism,
00:19:55and pretty soon you die.
00:19:57That's why I don't like kissing.
00:20:03Oh, little Abner, you is just my type.
00:20:07You ain't romantical, and that's just what I ain't.
00:20:11Is that what you ain't?
00:20:12Romantical is exactly what I ain't, as you can plainly see.
00:20:17Well, you always one gal and an awful lot.
00:20:20Sure would be nice to sit in that log and rest
00:20:23if I had some nice fence the boy talks to.
00:20:26If I sees one, ma'am, I'll be glad to send him back here.
00:20:29Trouble is, most boys get romantical, and I'd hate that.
00:20:33Naturally.
00:20:34But you wouldn't get romantical, would you, Mr. Yoakam?
00:20:38Not me.
00:20:39Yes, fine.
00:20:40Then we can talk about interesting subjects.
00:20:44Something that ain't romantical.
00:20:46Sure not.
00:20:47You know, it's kind of pretty in the air with soft wind blowing through the trees.
00:20:54Little birds singing, beautiful flowers smelling up the air.
00:21:04You know what it makes me feel like?
00:21:06No, what do it make you feel like?
00:21:09Like discussing educational subjects.
00:21:12For instance, what to do if a skonk gets in your woodshed?
00:21:15You know, skonks is funny little critters.
00:21:17I like discussing educational subjects.
00:21:21And, uh, learn things.
00:21:25What'll we discuss?
00:21:27Let's discuss the subject of Eskimos.
00:21:32What's that?
00:21:33People.
00:21:34Would you like to know how Eskimos kiss?
00:21:38No.
00:21:40Oh, they don't kiss the way you think.
00:21:43Put out your hands.
00:21:48That's how Eskimos kiss.
00:21:50Oh, Eskimos is so wonderful.
00:21:54Ooh.
00:21:55Would you like to know how Eskimos shaped hands?
00:22:00Sure would.
00:22:02Shut your eyes.
00:22:05Mmm.
00:22:07Mmm.
00:22:08Mmm.
00:22:09Mmm.
00:22:26Oh, Mom.
00:22:27Oh!
00:22:28He ain't even moving.
00:22:29Man, what a technique I've got.
00:22:36Little Abner.
00:22:37Little Abner, honey, is your hurt?
00:22:38Oh.
00:22:39Get out of sight.
00:22:40My technique is just starting to work.
00:22:42Get.
00:22:43Get.
00:22:44Get.
00:22:45Did you like that, little Abner?
00:22:59Oh, I hated it.
00:23:01I knew kissing would do this.
00:23:03It hurt my head.
00:23:05I'm a-going home.
00:23:06You ain't gonna run away after giving me such a nice kiss.
00:23:10You kissed me.
00:23:11I didn't kiss you.
00:23:12Of course, if I did, we'd be engaged.
00:23:13That's the code of the hills.
00:23:14Oh, my poor head.
00:23:15Oh.
00:23:16Ain't he honorable?
00:23:18Hm.
00:23:19Hm.
00:23:20I'm going back to Pineapple Junction.
00:23:21These men around here don't make no sense.
00:23:24He sure makes sense to me.
00:23:29Oh.
00:23:30Oh.
00:23:31Oh.
00:23:32Oh.
00:23:33Oh.
00:23:34Oh.
00:23:35Oh.
00:23:36Oh.
00:23:37Oh.
00:23:38Oh.
00:23:39Oh.
00:23:40Oh.
00:23:41Oh.
00:23:42Oh.
00:23:43Oh.
00:23:44Oh.
00:23:45Oh.
00:23:46Oh.
00:23:47Oh.
00:23:48Oh.
00:23:49Yes, there.
00:23:50Oh.
00:23:52Pancy!
00:23:53You scrub- and hide off my back!
00:23:54Might as well quit complaining, Lucifer.
00:23:55It's coming on winter, and it's time for your bath.
00:23:58Oh.
00:23:59Oh.
00:24:00I'm the most unhappy man!
00:24:04Hi, Lucifer.
00:24:06Morning, fantastic brown.
00:24:09Hm.
00:24:10Don't seem like no time since I gave my fantastic his spring clean in.
00:24:16pay me here.
00:24:17Take home when that's what it is.
00:24:19Get for home.
00:24:20You earn it.
00:24:21Oh, it ain't no ass near time for my winter scrubbing.
00:24:29Mammy.
00:24:31Off feels damp, Mammy.
00:24:33And powerful hungry.
00:24:35Quark always does come noon.
00:24:37Pick yourself a sandwich.
00:24:38That'll keep you spanked up.
00:24:39Sure.
00:24:40Don't zap.
00:24:41Quit till it gets through with Pappy.
00:24:45Quick, quick.
00:24:46Quick.
00:25:05Bansy, ain't you got no mercy?
00:25:08When I got a job to do, I doesn't.
00:25:11Howdy, Mrs. Shilcomb.
00:25:12Howdy, Hannibal Hoop.
00:25:13Where is little Abner?
00:25:16Me and him are going fishing.
00:25:18He's getting his stuff from Ziddle.
00:25:20No!
00:25:21I'll go tell him.
00:25:23I'm here.
00:25:28Bansy, have a little monkey on me.
00:25:31What did you fixin', little Abner?
00:25:32The oakum starvation preventer.
00:25:34Smells like you got sweet patootie in it.
00:25:36Not only sweet patootie, but I asked also sour pickles.
00:25:39Ham and cheese with catsup.
00:25:40Pineapple.
00:25:41Sardines off the can, of course.
00:25:42Two fried eggs left from breakfast.
00:25:43A rash of roast pork.
00:25:44Lots of catsup.
00:25:45Ain't you finished here, Pansy?
00:25:46Oh.
00:25:47I got it at the top.
00:25:48Ah.
00:25:49You see?
00:25:50You're beginning to like it.
00:25:51Oh.
00:25:55Oh.
00:25:56Oh.
00:25:57Oh.
00:25:58Oh.
00:25:59Yeah.
00:26:00Oh.
00:26:01Oh.
00:26:05Oh.
00:26:06Yeah.
00:26:07Oh.
00:26:08Oh.
00:26:09Yeah.
00:26:10Oh.
00:26:11Oh.
00:26:12Oh.
00:26:13Oh.
00:26:14Oh.
00:26:15Oh.
00:26:16Oh.
00:26:17I've got to slip on the mouse.
00:26:20And, like that?
00:26:22I just picked it on me.
00:26:38Put it!
00:26:39Put it!
00:26:40Show looks powerful good.
00:26:47Something missing.
00:26:49Maybe it's mustard.
00:26:51Maybe it was ripe.
00:26:56Little mustard ought to fix her.
00:27:06Stay ripe while you're weak.
00:27:08Come here, Salome.
00:27:17Come here, Salome.
00:27:18Yeah, Salome.
00:27:19Yeah!
00:27:20Might as well quit complaining, Salome.
00:27:22Won't kill you, don't go.
00:27:30What's the matter, little Abner?
00:27:32I've got a most peculiar feeling.
00:27:34Oh, it must be because my stomach's empty.
00:27:37I've got a lot of energy ininterest.
00:27:39Come here, Salome.
00:27:47I'll do the same.
00:27:49It's...
00:27:50It's...
00:27:51It's...
00:27:52Family, I've got a terrible misery in my stomach.
00:27:55What you put in your sandwich, son?
00:27:57Just a few things, and enough ketchup and horseradish
00:27:59and mustard to make her tasty.
00:28:01Mustard?
00:28:02You know that stuff ain't agreed with you
00:28:04since the time you ate that mustard plaster
00:28:06What you'll need is a doctor.
00:28:08There ain't no doctor around here.
00:28:10You know that.
00:28:11There'll be one.
00:28:12Says so right here.
00:28:14Dr. Barber will be on the Limited
00:28:16when it stops at the county side in Fort Wortha at noon.
00:28:20And that's right where I'm going.
00:28:25Don't be late for supper, son.
00:28:36Well, there she is.
00:28:45Oh, I wonder what Dr. Barber is at.
00:28:50Always spit the old soup bones when you get a chance.
00:28:52That's what I always say.
00:28:54How's the man gone on a white coat like doctors has?
00:28:56Maybe that's Dr. Barber.
00:28:58I'll go ask him.
00:28:59You go that-a-way in case it ain't.
00:29:06Is your barber?
00:29:08That's me.
00:29:09What's in your mind, kid?
00:29:10Can you fix me up?
00:29:11Well, that's a pretty big order.
00:29:14That mop looks like a busted mattress.
00:29:16But with my trusty scissors, I can probably fix you up all right.
00:29:19You ain't gonna cut me, is you?
00:29:21What's the matter with you, boy?
00:29:23I'm sick.
00:29:24Horrible sick.
00:29:25Well, now, what am I supposed to do?
00:29:27Bust out in tears?
00:29:28That'd be mighty sweet of you,
00:29:30but all I want to know is what ails me.
00:29:32Well, sir, that's what we'd all like to know.
00:29:36Can't be my appetite,
00:29:38because I just ate a combination ham, cheese,
00:29:41pineapple, sardine, sweet patootie,
00:29:44sour, fickle, fried egg, preserved turnip,
00:29:46and roast hog sandwich.
00:29:47Whew!
00:29:48Whoa, with cats of horseradish and mustard, doctor.
00:29:52Doctor, well, can't be your appetite, son.
00:29:56Let me see.
00:29:57Doctor, hmm?
00:29:59Stick out your tongue.
00:30:00Let me look at that tongue.
00:30:01Stick it way out, way out.
00:30:02That's it.
00:30:03Now, say, ah.
00:30:05Ah.
00:30:05You're flat.
00:30:06Is off?
00:30:07Well, now, just, uh, take a good deep breath, now.
00:30:11Take a good deep breath.
00:30:11That's it.
00:30:12Now, stick your stomach out.
00:30:14Come on, stick it out.
00:30:15Stick it way out.
00:30:16That's it.
00:30:16Now, close your eyes.
00:30:18Oh!
00:30:18Did you feel a sharp twinge?
00:30:21All aboard.
00:30:21Oh, my boy, that's bad.
00:30:23That's bad.
00:30:24You've got it.
00:30:25You've got it.
00:30:26What has I got?
00:30:27You've got thrombosis.
00:30:30Thrombosis?
00:30:30I've got thrombosis.
00:30:31You've got it.
00:30:32I've got thrombosis.
00:30:32I've got thrombosis.
00:30:33Will I die?
00:30:35You're dead now, from the neck up.
00:30:38How soon will the rest of me be dead?
00:30:40In 24 hours.
00:30:46I didn't find no doctor barber.
00:30:48I did.
00:30:49You did?
00:30:50What'd he say?
00:30:51He told me I was going to be dead in 24 hours, when I caught up.
00:30:57I got thrombosis.
00:31:01You don't mean you'll be dead by tomorrow?
00:31:03Dated in a catfish, hey, come noon.
00:31:06That's life.
00:31:08You are today.
00:31:10It's our tomorrow.
00:31:17Hello, mammy.
00:31:18How'd you feel, his son?
00:31:19Howdy, Pappy.
00:31:20How's your misery?
00:31:21My stomach feels fine.
00:31:22If only the doctor hadn't told me, I wouldn't know I was going to be dead in 24 hours.
00:31:27Dead?
00:31:28What do you mean?
00:31:29Just plain dead.
00:31:30Oh?
00:31:31Housewrench.
00:31:32Well, all you've got is a pinch of mustard poisoning.
00:31:37You're very comforting.
00:31:41But I have prepared my mind.
00:31:43I've got it.
00:31:44I've got it, Pappy.
00:31:45How's your misery?
00:31:46My stomach feels fine.
00:31:47If only the doctor hadn't told me, I wouldn't know I was going to be dead in 24 hours.
00:31:49I've prepared my mind.
00:31:50Well, son, if you're going to be dead, you're going to be dead.
00:31:56I will be most sad and lonely.
00:32:01Naturally.
00:32:02But Daisy Mae will be most sad, too.
00:32:03Seems to me it ain't fair you're dying.
00:32:04And not tell her nothing about it.
00:32:05Those key wrecked, mammy.
00:32:06All that tells her I loves her.
00:32:07Do you?
00:32:08I means that I dislike her less than any other gal.
00:32:09What must I do, mammy?
00:32:10You could marry up with her.
00:32:11I could.
00:32:12Now that I'm going to be dead.
00:32:13Sonia, your time's getting mighty short.
00:32:14I'm going to make love to her like she always wanted me to.
00:32:21Pathy, shut your face.
00:32:28Here, Hannibal.
00:32:29You follow little Abner.
00:32:30Does he do anything peculiar?
00:32:31Come back here and tell me.
00:32:32But Mrs. Joachim, he might...
00:32:33He won't.
00:32:34Just do as a pill.
00:32:35Yes, sir.
00:32:36Oh.
00:32:37Oh.
00:32:38Oh.
00:32:39Oh.
00:32:40Oh.
00:32:41Oh.
00:32:42Oh.
00:32:43Oh.
00:32:44Oh.
00:32:45Oh.
00:32:46Oh.
00:32:47Oh.
00:32:48Oh.
00:32:49Oh.
00:32:50Oh.
00:32:51Oh.
00:32:52Oh.
00:32:53Oh.
00:32:54Oh.
00:32:55Oh.
00:32:56Oh.
00:32:57Oh.
00:32:58Oh.
00:32:59Oh.
00:33:00Oh.
00:33:01Oh.
00:33:02Oh.
00:33:03Oh.
00:33:04Oh.
00:33:05Oh.
00:33:06Oh.
00:33:07Oh.
00:33:08Oh.
00:33:09Oh.
00:33:10Oh.
00:33:11Oh.
00:33:12Oh.
00:33:13Oh.
00:33:14Oh.
00:33:15Oh.
00:33:16Oh.
00:33:17Oh.
00:33:18Oh.
00:33:19Oh.
00:33:20Oh.
00:33:21Oh.
00:33:22Oh.
00:33:23Oh.
00:33:24Well, I must say, you hold your age pretty well, but you is a tempting fate.
00:33:31I know.
00:33:32It's getting along.
00:33:33Well, you better teach yourself a man this city, Hawkins Day,
00:33:36for you won't be able to run fast enough next year.
00:33:39To teach what?
00:33:40I don't want just any man.
00:33:42I want a little lightning.
00:33:49Kindly step out, you are with me.
00:33:51Yes, of course I will.
00:33:53The sharp place looked romantic-o-enough.
00:33:56No.
00:33:57Sit down.
00:34:02Now, Ames to come...
00:34:03Dogpatch style?
00:34:04Dogpatch style.
00:34:05I was ready.
00:34:20I was ready.
00:34:22I was ready.
00:34:23I've been ready for yours.
00:34:33You'll want to tell me I was your sweet patooty blossom.
00:34:39You'll want to tell me you loves me.
00:34:41That you just can't live without me.
00:34:42Oh, little Abney, that's just exactly what I want to hear you say.
00:34:58Because love is what I was in love with you.
00:35:02Don't do that.
00:35:03Don't do that.
00:35:04I can't stand it.
00:35:05It's awful.
00:35:06It's so awful just to have me near you, little Abney.
00:35:08It makes me feel miserable.
00:35:09When I feel miserable, I was the most unhappy man.
00:35:14I don't want to make you unhappy, little Abney.
00:35:15I don't want to make you unhappy, little Abney.
00:35:21I don't want to make you unhappy, little Abney.
00:35:24I don't want to make you unhappy, little Abney.
00:35:29Yeah, it's very nice.
00:35:31What's your Getting plan?
00:35:33You're an presenter.
00:35:35I'm sorry.
00:35:36You're thinking we're going to get you hurt.
00:35:38Why don't you destroy.
00:35:40You're when just do the game.
00:35:42All right.
00:35:43Well, before those of you, I ought to keep us away later.
00:35:44Let's pay attention toρη Part of this heaveness.
00:35:48Now we'll have to leave it,, and now it's all down State.
00:35:50Here's my tenant, and now, living aged, the middle of my birthday.
00:35:55There's not that I want to stay, but stay awake Whoo!
00:35:56Don't you belong to here?
00:35:57You landed him.
00:35:59Will you wear your pink cheese sauce or your white muslin
00:36:02with the make-believe sweet patootie blaster?
00:36:05I reckon I'll wear the pink with the white sweet patootie
00:36:07veil.
00:36:09Do you think that'll look pretty little Adley?
00:36:11Sure will.
00:36:13You aiming to go to a party?
00:36:15Yes, a wedding party.
00:36:17Oh, very unfortunate.
00:36:19Well, who's it getting married?
00:36:21You and her.
00:36:23You and her.
00:36:25Me and her?
00:36:27Yep, you and her.
00:36:29I didn't say nothing about no getting married.
00:36:31I wanted to make her happy, so I kissed her.
00:36:33That's all.
00:36:34That's enough.
00:36:35The boys around here don't kiss gals until the day
00:36:37before they get married.
00:36:39And today's the day before you get married.
00:36:41That's the code of the hills.
00:36:45Our respects.
00:36:47I'm sorry.
00:36:49I'm sorry.
00:36:51I'm sorry.
00:36:53Our respects.
00:36:55And salutes.
00:36:56The code of the hills.
00:36:58Our love is the code of the hills.
00:37:00Come on, gal.
00:37:03Tomorrow noon's told fast enough, and you've got things to you.
00:37:06Come on.
00:37:07Goodbye, little Abner, dear.
00:37:08I'll be at your wedding tomorrow, eh?
00:37:10I'll be at your wedding tomorrow.
00:37:12Little Abner.
00:37:13Huh?
00:37:14You can't get married tomorrow noon.
00:37:15I've got it.
00:37:16It's the code of the hills.
00:37:20But you'll be dead.
00:37:22And if I'm dead, I'll be dead.
00:37:25You can't get married tomorrow noon.
00:37:27I've got it.
00:37:29It's the code of the hills.
00:37:34But you'll be dead.
00:37:38And if I'm dead, I can't be married.
00:37:42Oh, happy tomorrow noon.
00:37:50I've also got things to do.
00:37:53Here I am, knowing all about my future,
00:37:56and doing nothing about my mammies and my poor pappies.
00:38:00You know, it's most kind and considerate
00:38:02to be thinking of them at a time like this.
00:38:05You'll see this paper?
00:38:07Sure, I ain't blind.
00:38:09That's the Magoon reward.
00:38:14I'm going to Skunk Harbor.
00:38:16But R.I. aims to call briefly on Earthquake Magoon.
00:38:20That's what I aims to do.
00:38:24Little Adner!
00:38:26The Magoon's turn.
00:38:49When I was on Earthquake Magoon, I told her.
00:38:50I smell the live dog-patcher.
00:38:52How you'll know he's a dog-patcher?
00:38:54Because he don'ts me.
00:38:58Will you quit fainting it open that safe?
00:39:02I only brung you along because you're the cashier.
00:39:06Yes, sir, Mr. McBoo.
00:39:08I'm a bit nervous.
00:39:12I'm a bit nervous.
00:39:16I'm a dead dog boulevard.
00:39:26Good top floor.
00:39:32I'm a dead dog boulevard.
00:39:36Good top floor.
00:39:40I'm a dead dog boulevard.
00:39:44I'm a dead dog boulevard.
00:39:48Earthplake Magoonoff resumes.
00:39:52Ours here to take you to the sheriff.
00:39:54For our aims to collect a $25 reward.
00:39:56That's most interesting.
00:39:58This are gifts to my sweet mammy and pappy,
00:40:00which they will use to live most comfortably
00:40:02the rest of their natural lives in dog paths.
00:40:04I'm a dead dog.
00:40:06I'm a dead dog.
00:40:08I'm a dead dog.
00:40:10I'm a dead dog.
00:40:12I'm a dead dog.
00:40:14Is it?
00:40:16Is Joe from Dogpatch?
00:40:18As you know, that's about to be dead.
00:40:20Goon's got a live dog patch.
00:40:22Goon's got a live dog patch up there.
00:40:28Hey, Damien.
00:40:30Hold on, there.
00:40:32Hey, Magoon.
00:40:34Magoon's got a live dog patch up there.
00:40:36Here comes the goons, from the outside.
00:41:06Here comes the goons, from the outside.
00:41:36Oh, he's killed the dog, Pat.
00:41:43Come on, man, let's go.
00:41:44Wait a minute.
00:41:45Joy comes now.
00:42:06Back away, man!
00:42:08Back away!
00:42:09He's a demon!
00:42:11A killer killer!
00:42:13No dog, Pat, you're demon enough for all of us!
00:42:17Come on!
00:42:25Not around me!
00:42:27What?
00:42:28Come on, men!
00:42:29Let's go after him!
00:42:31Come on!
00:42:36Get out of the way!
00:42:38Come on!
00:42:39Go to the phải!
00:42:40Come on!
00:42:41Get out of the way!
00:42:42Come on!
00:42:43Get out of the way!
00:42:44Get out!
00:42:45Get out of the way!
00:42:46Get out of the way!
00:42:47Come on, man!
00:42:48Put it down!
00:42:49Get it in!
00:42:50Go on!
00:42:51Go!
00:42:52Go!
00:42:53How is it going?
00:42:54Go!
00:42:55Don't go, Joe!
00:42:57Corrin!
00:42:58Yes?
00:42:59Come on!
00:43:00Hold.
00:43:01No!
00:43:02Let's go!
00:43:04We'll build her right here.
00:43:16There's your boat.
00:43:21Look.
00:43:22Look, they've started a fire.
00:43:32What was that?
00:43:34Oh, I said, hello.
00:43:50How do you do?
00:43:51Is you a man or a beast?
00:43:57I have a gal named Wendy Wildcat.
00:44:00Oh, sure is.
00:44:02Gal, do you know another way out of here?
00:44:04Them skunk hollers have got me trapped.
00:44:06And of course, if you'll wish us to get out.
00:44:08Naturally, don't you?
00:44:10If I goes out, I'll have to marry up with my goon.
00:44:14And he sure ain't my ideal.
00:44:17Does you show me another way out of here?
00:44:19I'll help you locate your ideal.
00:44:21I will be most delighted to help you.
00:44:23Does you keep your guardian and bring me my ideal, which is your,
00:44:28little Admin?
00:44:29I'll do anything you'll say.
00:44:30I'll do anything you'll say.
00:44:31I'll...
00:44:32Mm-hmm.
00:44:33Does...
00:44:34Does...
00:44:35I'll marry up with you?
00:44:36That's exactly what I mean.
00:44:38Oh, no, ma'am.
00:44:39I just couldn't.
00:44:41Just a minute.
00:44:44When must I marry up with you?
00:44:46Tomorrow, at noon.
00:44:47At noon.
00:44:48An upper pole?
00:44:49Exactly at noon.
00:44:50I'll be yours tomorrow at noon.
00:44:51No matter what shape I was in.
00:44:53Come on.
00:44:54Pick up your bundles and follow me.
00:44:56So now.
00:44:59What?
00:45:00Just away.
00:45:02Twenty-three, twenty-four, and twenty-five dollars.
00:45:07There you is, little Admin.
00:45:08Oh, thank you most kindly.
00:45:10Who has relieved the county of public polecat number one?
00:45:14Sure and further, Mr. Yoakum.
00:45:16You have saved all of the bank's money.
00:45:19And my life.
00:45:21There.
00:45:23You are most kind.
00:45:26Oh, be careful.
00:45:27It's a ten-center.
00:45:28I will guard it very tenderly.
00:45:30Goodbye.
00:45:31Goodbye, Sheriff.
00:45:41Goodbye.
00:45:42Goodbye.
00:45:45Goodbye.
00:47:42And only yesterday I seen him a-goin' turkey huntin'.
00:47:50Cornelius Cornpone!
00:47:52Who is that?
00:47:53Is that your little Abner?
00:47:54Sure is.
00:47:59Howdy!
00:48:00Cornelius Cornpone.
00:48:01I never thought you'd make it.
00:48:05But Joe, sure is an angel.
00:48:12You really think so?
00:48:15Oh, sure do.
00:48:18Tell me, Cornelius, does you like it up here?
00:48:31Yeah, I think it's fine.
00:48:34Cornelius, does they feed you good?
00:48:37You know, does you get preserved tornips and pulp chops, maybe?
00:48:41Well, yeah, of course I does.
00:48:44Oh, gosh, that's most encouraging.
00:48:53Well, I gotta be walkin' along.
00:48:56Is Joe gonna walk?
00:49:00Yeah, sure.
00:49:05Confound it, idiot.
00:49:06He walks, and with a pair of wings like that.
00:49:10But I ain't no chump.
00:49:11I'm gonna fly.
00:49:14Hey!
00:49:15Don't, don't, don't!
00:49:25Guess I ain't been dead long enough for him to sprout.
00:49:27What's the matter with you, boy?
00:49:30Cornelius!
00:49:31What's the matter with you?
00:49:33Where are your wings?
00:49:34Stop it!
00:49:35Stop it!
00:49:36Stop it!
00:49:37Are you crazy?
00:49:38Oh, you're just trying to kill yourself.
00:49:39I can't kill myself.
00:49:40Because I was already dead.
00:49:41Oh, is I?
00:49:42Look, you're the liveest lookin' yokem I ever seen.
00:49:43Oh, I gotta be dead.
00:49:44On account of I done promised to marry up with two different gals come noon.
00:49:46Oh, what must I do?
00:49:47Mammy!
00:49:48I'm gonna fly home and...
00:49:52I'm gonna walk home.
00:49:53Ah!
00:49:54Ah!
00:49:55Ah!
00:49:56Ah!
00:49:57I'm gonna fly home and...
00:49:58Ah!
00:49:59Oh!
00:50:00I'm gonna walk home.
00:50:01Ah!
00:50:02Ah!
00:50:03You're the liveest lookin' yokem I ever see him!
00:50:05Ah, ah!
00:50:06Oh!
00:50:07It's gotta be dead.
00:50:08On account of I done promised to marry up with two different gals come noon!
00:50:10Oh, what must I do?
00:50:11I'm going to walk home.
00:50:41Sadie Hawkins!
00:50:42Hooray!
00:50:43Hooray!
00:50:44Sadie Hawkins!
00:50:46Quiet, gals.
00:50:47Quiet.
00:50:48I am about to officially proclaim an announcement about Sadie Hawkins' day, which is tomorrow.
00:51:01Any man that does not appear will suffer the most de-stressful consequences.
00:51:10My committee here will choose a wife for him, and Mary and Sam will do the rest.
00:51:20My dear friends of dogpacks.
00:51:23That's all.
00:51:24The official course is marked off with the usual flags and is now open for practice.
00:51:30Now, Tamari, when I fires the shot that starts the race, I'm going to get to the end of the
00:51:39Maybe the we will fall into the distance, but I can't do it.
00:51:45I'm still going to hang on to the poor.
00:51:47How old does it go with the うm?
00:51:48You're going to have to cut out.
00:51:49I'm now going to be João, and it will be two-year-old.
00:51:51How old do you get your job?
00:51:53How old do you get your job?
00:51:54How old do you get your job?
00:51:55You're going to be in the middle of the house.
00:51:56Here, you're going to be a good job.
00:51:57He's got an engagement for marriage with me at this very moment.
00:52:00He has not, because he's going to marry with me at this very moment.
00:52:03He's mine, mine, mine, mine.
00:52:06Looks like some of the gals are trying to jump the gun.
00:52:11Your, your.
00:52:17Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:52:20Tomari is Sadie Hawkins' day.
00:52:22Keep your hands off of him.
00:52:24You keep yours off of him.
00:52:25Mayor Gurgle, we've engaged to be married this very noon.
00:52:29She comes along, he promised to marry me this noon.
00:52:32Now, just a minute, just a minute.
00:52:35Little Abner, did you promise these two gals?
00:52:39Well, yes, sir.
00:52:41You promise, that's all I want to know, thank you.
00:52:48Committee.
00:52:48It is my decision that this matter be settled tomorrow in the Sadie Hawkins race.
00:53:00Whichever gal catches him, he's heard.
00:53:03In the meantime,
00:53:06little Abner Yoakam is resolved
00:53:09for only these two gals
00:53:11until sundown tomorrow.
00:53:13And I'll be back.
00:53:14I'll be back.
00:53:15Good luck.
00:53:16Thank you, Mayor Gurgle.
00:53:17Good luck to you, Wendy.
00:53:18And good luck to you, Wendy.
00:53:20And little Abner.
00:53:22And little Abner.
00:53:23Little Abner.
00:53:24So naturally, I figured I was going to be Dave.
00:53:27So, naturally, I figured I was going to be Dade.
00:53:30Instead of which, I'm afraid I'm going to be married up
00:53:32with two different gals.
00:53:34Mammy, you've got to have me.
00:53:36Son, your hair's got yourself in a terrible mess.
00:53:39What must I do?
00:53:41According to the rules of Sadie Hawkins, Dade,
00:53:43I can't tell you nothing.
00:53:45I've got an idea, little Abner.
00:53:47If something should happen to Wendy Wildcat...
00:53:49Get it!
00:53:50But somebody's got to help me.
00:53:52All I can do is just give you a hint.
00:53:54What is it, Mammy?
00:53:56It's safer to be a hound dog than a rabbit.
00:53:59What do you mean, Pangey?
00:54:01Yeah.
00:54:02That's all I can tell you.
00:54:04It's safer to be a hound dog than a rabbit.
00:54:06Ah, quit your worrying, son.
00:54:08I'll watch your nice, clean shoes.
00:54:10I'll watch your nice, clean shoes.
00:54:13I'll watch your nice, clean shoes.
00:54:15I'll watch your nice, clean shoes.
00:54:17I'll watch your nice, clean shoes.
00:54:19For the Sadie Hawkins celebration tonight.
00:54:21Go on.
00:54:22Go and have a lot of fun.
00:54:24Safer of a hound dog than a rabbit?
00:54:39Keep riding the groove, boys.
00:54:41Oh, I sure hate these formal dances.
00:54:44Shoes hurt my feet, too.
00:54:47I'm stuck.
00:54:49Oh.
00:54:50Oh.
00:54:51Oh.
00:54:52Fueled, that ain't the way to dance.
00:54:54Sure is.
00:54:55Nice little Sadie Hawkins day.
00:54:56Oh.
00:54:57Oh.
00:54:58Oh.
00:54:59Oh.
00:55:00Oh.
00:55:01Oh.
00:55:02Oh.
00:55:03Oh.
00:55:04Oh.
00:55:05Oh.
00:55:06Oh.
00:55:08Oh.
00:55:09Oh, oh.
00:55:10Well, Lavner, tomorrow we'll be liable to be bachelors no more.
00:55:17Lavner, sure wouldn't mind to have this dance with you.
00:55:35Hold on, darling, you had your share.
00:55:38Little Lavner, I wish you to dance with you.
00:55:41Oh, I don't want to dance.
00:55:43Don't make no difference.
00:55:44We won't say you got it.
00:55:45That's right.
00:55:47Oh, shucks.
00:56:03Excuse me very kindly, but it's now my turn to dance.
00:56:07Give me a chord, boys.
00:56:13Attention!
00:56:14Quiet, everybody!
00:56:15Ladies and bachelors, we are about to hold the Sadie Hawkins Bachelor Beauty Review.
00:56:20All bachelors line up here for the platform.
00:56:22Come on, little Amnery.
00:56:23You's in this contest.
00:56:24Please start for me.
00:56:25Stay there, Pitt.
00:56:26All the bachelors got to get in line.
00:56:27That's the rule.
00:56:28Go on.
00:56:29Sure enough.
00:56:30Oh, man.
00:56:31Oh, man.
00:56:32Oh, man.
00:56:33Oh, man.
00:56:34What's a man?
00:56:35I'm going to smile pretty.
00:56:36I aims to get myself pitched for marriage.
00:56:38Me too.
00:56:39Then squad build on fire.
00:56:40Are you ready?
00:56:41Start the music.
00:56:43Are you ready?
00:56:44Start the music.
00:56:45Oh, man.
00:56:46Oh, man.
00:56:47Oh, man.
00:56:48Oh, man.
00:56:49I'm going to smile pretty.
00:56:50I aims to get myself pitched for marriage.
00:56:53Me too.
00:56:54Then squad build on fire.
00:56:56Are you ready?
00:56:58Start the music.
00:57:00Come on in there.
00:57:01Keep going.
00:57:02Get it on.
00:57:03Get on.
00:57:04Run around there.
00:57:05Fourteen.
00:57:06Nine.
00:57:07Eleven.
00:57:08Oh.
00:57:09Oh.
00:57:10Oh.
00:57:11Oh.
00:57:12Oh.
00:57:13Oh.
00:57:14Oh.
00:57:15Oh.
00:57:16Oh.
00:57:17Oh.
00:57:18Oh.
00:57:19Oh.
00:57:20Oh.
00:57:21Oh.
00:57:22Oh.
00:57:23Oh.
00:57:24Oh.
00:57:25Oh.
00:57:26Oh.
00:57:27Oh.
00:57:28Oh.
00:57:29Oh.
00:57:30Oh.
00:57:31Oh.
00:57:32Oh.
00:57:33Oh.
00:57:34Oh.
00:57:35Oh.
00:57:35Come on.
00:57:37Oh, Dad.
00:57:38Let's.
00:57:39I like that big, gawky, red-headed boy.
00:57:42I've been after him for four yards.
00:57:44And this yard, I aims to catch it.
00:57:47I wish I could consult with you about our honeymoon.
00:58:03Tomorrow night you'll be mine, little Abner dear.
00:58:05Just think.
00:58:08I is a thinker.
00:58:10About me?
00:58:11I was trying to figure out why it's safer to be a home dog than a rabbit.
00:58:16Your riddle is simple.
00:58:19On account that safer to chase than to be chased.
00:58:26Chased?
00:58:27Be chased.
00:58:31And it's it now!
00:58:33Oh, happy Sadie Hawkins Day!
00:58:36Yippee!
00:58:46Oh boy!
00:58:49Pooft!
00:58:50Poor boy!
00:58:56Don't be so tender!
00:58:57Keep cool, Wendee Wildcat!
00:58:59He sure is anxious!
00:59:00From what I hear, that little Abner's worth catching.
00:59:07You just gotta catch him this yard, Daisy Mae.
00:59:14Morning, Mommy, you come.
00:59:15Good day for the race, Mayor.
00:59:17Sure it is, sure it is.
00:59:19All bachelors to the starting line.
00:59:22All the fine crux is here, Mayor.
00:59:24Yeah, a good yard, a good yard.
00:59:26Yes, sir.
00:59:27Well, good luck, boys.
00:59:28Hi, Mayor.
00:59:29Never seen the more determined-looking lot of girls.
00:59:31But Pansy, what if Andy Wildcat catches him?
00:59:35Howdy, Santa France.
00:59:36I ain't seen you since last Sadie Hawkins' day.
00:59:39If you ain't gonna do nothing for our son, I is.
00:59:44Is I?
00:59:49I is.
00:59:51Bring him to me.
00:59:52I'll take you up.
00:59:53Yes.
00:59:54I'll take you up.
00:59:55Let's go.
00:59:56Say, you two's as boxers, ain't ya?
00:59:58Sure not.
01:00:00Get in the line, men.
01:00:01Oh.
01:00:02All right.
01:00:15Hello.
01:00:16Mr. Earthquake.
01:00:18What do you want, little man?
01:00:20Uh, I would like to make a business call on you.
01:00:23What business a little skunk like you got with me?
01:00:27Ah, please, hold your horses.
01:00:31Yes.
01:00:33First, I want you to keep your windy wildcat from marrying
01:00:37with my southern little apple.
01:00:39Does she catch him in the race?
01:00:41Yes.
01:00:43I met you, son.
01:00:45Does you give me that boy, I'll guarantee
01:00:49he'll never see windy wildcat again.
01:00:51I know.
01:00:53You promise on your honor?
01:00:55I promise.
01:01:13It's high noon.
01:01:15Clear the course.
01:01:17Clear the course.
01:01:18Get away.
01:01:19He's back there.
01:01:20Now, everybody understands the rules.
01:01:23When I fire the gun the first time, the bachelors take off.
01:01:28Two minutes later, I fire the gun the second time,
01:01:33and the gals take off.
01:01:35Any bachelor that gets catched has got to ask the gals to marry with him.
01:01:41Still, all you've got to remember is to bring your man to me, dear,
01:01:46and I guarantee to give you the finest wedding.
01:01:50That's all.
01:01:51Everybody get ready.
01:01:54On your mark.
01:01:56All ready, get set, go!
01:02:11Get set, go!
01:02:12Oh!
01:02:13What happened?
01:02:14Stand aside!
01:02:15Stand aside!
01:02:16I'm all done!
01:02:17Get the gals to the line!
01:02:19Yes!
01:02:20All the times later!
01:02:21Stand up there!
01:02:22Oh!
01:02:23Look out, Daisy Mae!
01:02:25Oh, look out, Daisy Mae!
01:02:26Good luck to you, Daisy Mae.
01:02:27We're for ya!
01:02:28Good luck to you, Daisy Mae.
01:02:30We're for you.
01:02:32That gal ain't got a chance with me.
01:02:34Go get him, Wendy.
01:02:36We're for you.
01:02:38Ready!
01:02:40All ready!
01:02:42Get on your mark!
01:02:44Oh, my God!
01:02:46Oh, my God!
01:02:48Oh, my God!
01:02:50Oh, my God!
01:02:52Oh, my God!
01:02:54Oh, my God!
01:02:56Oh, my God!
01:02:57Oh, my God!
01:02:59Oh, my God!
01:03:01Oh, my God!
01:03:03Oh, my God!
01:03:05Oh, my God!
01:03:07Oh, my God!
01:03:09Oh, my God!
01:03:11Oh, my God!
01:03:13Oh, my God!
01:03:15Oh, my God!
01:03:17Oh, my God!
01:03:19Oh, my God!
01:03:21Oh, my God!
01:03:23Oh, my God!
01:03:25Hey, Ernie, hey!
01:03:41Hey!
01:03:58Ow!
01:04:01Hey!
01:04:01Hey!
01:04:01Hey!
01:04:02Hey!
01:04:04Hey!
01:04:05Hey!
01:04:06Hey!
01:04:07Hey!
01:04:11Oh, Mr. Sharer.
01:04:17You, what have you done with Earthquake Magoon?
01:04:21I ain't done nothing with him.
01:04:24But look what he did with me.
01:04:29Which way did he go?
01:04:30He went another way.
01:04:32Out of the alarm!
01:04:34Hurry up!
01:04:35Come on, deputies!
01:04:41Get the dynamite, men!
01:04:44And don't forget your vans.
01:04:46He's safe on the course without him.
01:04:48Come on, baby!
01:04:49Come on, baby!
01:04:50Help me!
01:05:05Help!
01:05:06Help!
01:05:07Help!
01:05:08Get back!
01:05:09Help!
01:05:10Help!
01:05:11Get back!
01:05:12Help!
01:05:13Get back!
01:05:14Help!
01:05:15Help!
01:05:16Go!
01:05:17Get back!
01:05:25There's one in there for you, Sally.
01:05:27Oh, dear.
01:05:28You need to move.
01:05:29You move.
01:05:30You will get your polecat bar and squar.
01:05:41You miserable clicker, you.
01:05:44Oh, no!
01:05:45Help!
01:05:46Wait!
01:05:47Help!
01:05:48Help!
01:05:49Help!
01:05:50Help!
01:05:51Help!
01:05:52Help!
01:05:53Help!
01:05:54Help!
01:05:55Help!
01:05:57Help!
01:05:58Help!
01:05:59Out!
01:06:01Out!
01:06:03Out!
01:06:05Out!
01:06:07Out!
01:06:29Out!
01:06:31Out!
01:06:33Look out!
01:06:35Run around him!
01:06:43Oh, he is.
01:06:47Let him have it, men.
01:06:59Come on, men.
01:07:15Follow me.
01:07:17Come on, men.
01:07:19Follow me.
01:07:21Come on.
01:07:23Come on, men.
01:07:25Follow me.
01:07:27Come on, men.
01:07:41Follow me.
01:07:45The End
01:08:15I do declare. I reckon I'll have to catch my breath. What boy is you after? I just, uh, I was just a stranger around here. I'm looking them over. It mustn't take too long. A windy wildcat will catch a little wildcat.
01:08:45I'll have to show. What air so humorous? I just thought maybe he ain't worth catching. What do you mean he ain't worth catching? He's the finest boy in all these Shaw Hills. The best looking. Why all the gals is crazy about him.
01:08:59Little Abner!
01:09:01Whoa!
01:09:02Whoa!
01:09:03Whoa!
01:09:14Handball! I catched him first. So, Rose, you think you've got yourself something? I sure has. Little Abner, dear, you was mine at life.
01:09:23Little Abner!
01:09:25Yeah!
01:09:26Little Abner!
01:09:27Every gal in town is after Little Abner, poor Abner. He's a superman at swimmin'. He'll give any man a trimmin'. But when it comes to kissin' pretty women...
01:09:29Little Abner, you-hoo!
01:09:31Every gal in town is after Little Abner, poor Abner. He's a superman at swimmin'. He'll give any man a trimmin'. But when it comes to kissin' pretty women...
01:09:36Little Abner, you-hoo!
01:09:42Little Abner, you-hoo!
01:09:43Little Abner, you-hoo!
01:09:44He's the biggest catchin' dog facts.
01:09:46Little Abner, You-hoo!
01:09:48Little Abner, you-hoo!
01:09:50from the way, Daisy hollering, but you ought to see him go on
01:09:55Sadie Hawkins day, Little Abner, ooh-hoo, Little Abner, ooh-hoo,
01:10:02he's the biggest catch in dogfax, Little Abner, Little Abner,
01:10:07he's the handsome and the dashing, that the gals can't stop
01:10:11their mashing, but when they whisper, what's your secret passion,
01:10:15Little Abner's dead pork chug.
01:10:20Little Abner