Keenan's 2019 - Wiz Wit What
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FunTranscript
00:00I need to switch to my Bob Barker microphone.
00:04Oh, I love your Bob Barker microphone.
00:07Sensational.
00:08All right, now I have my new mic all set up.
00:10You can hardly tell an audio difference, Preston.
00:12Now, when you get your cheese steak, do you get whiz wit?
00:16Do you get whiz wit out?
00:16What do you do?
00:17I get it wit out.
00:18Yeah, I'm not a whiz guy.
00:20I do get wit, but I don't do the whiz.
00:23But some people like it whiz wit all the way up.
00:26Yeah.
00:26And our friends from Steak'Em Up are going to be helping us out with this.
00:29So it's apropos that we're doing a contest.
00:31We love these guys.
00:32Because the name of the contest is called Whiz Wit What.
00:36All right?
00:37So what we're going to do is we're going to get a few contestants up here on stage.
00:40And it wouldn't be our Canaan's Live broadcast if we didn't have people eating interesting things.
00:45Yes.
00:45So that's what we've done.
00:47We have a variety of things that we are going to cover in Cheez Whiz.
00:51We are going to have our contestants taste them.
00:53If they can identify it, then they win a prize.
00:56We have $100 from Steak'Em Up to give away.
00:58Now, these are pretty difficult to figure out.
01:00So we're going to allow clues.
01:02It will cost them $25 per clue.
01:04They get three guesses.
01:06If they need a clue, we'll take $25 off the $100.
01:09If they need two clues, we'll take $50 off the $100 and so on.
01:12So let's get our first contestant up here, Marissa, if you would, please.
01:15What is your name?
01:16Sarah.
01:17Sarah, you look lovely this morning.
01:19What we're going to do is we're going to bring out, and I will tell you that everything here,
01:24bring the music down a little bit, Casey, if you would, please.
01:27Everything is edible that we have, all right?
01:29And we are going to serve you something with Cheez Whiz on it.
01:32So all you have to do is guess what you're eating, and you win the money.
01:35Do you understand?
01:36Yes.
01:37All right, and how are you as far as having a strong stomach?
01:40I'm pretty strong.
01:41All right, well, let's try it out.
01:42Okay, we're going to put this blindfold on Sarah.
01:46Hold up a sign.
01:47This is what Sarah is going to be eating first.
01:50So, yep.
01:52Do you have the Cheez Whiz?
01:54All right.
01:55Perfecto.
01:55Here we go.
01:56Let's get this started.
01:57We're going to put some Whiz on there.
01:59Preston, can you smell this?
02:00It's disgusting.
02:01All right, now, Nick is going to serve the Whiz-covered item.
02:05Sarah, open your mouth, and here we go.
02:08Just kind of take a bite.
02:10You may not be able to chew it up.
02:12If you need to spit it out, there's a bucket to your right.
02:15You can lose this, Nick.
02:16She's chewing.
02:17Oh, my God.
02:18I think I'm going to hurl.
02:20Yeah, she's chewing.
02:22She's actually biting it.
02:23She's actually eating it.
02:24Yeah, that's horrific.
02:26So, Sarah, have a taste of it.
02:29All right, throw it in the bucket.
02:30It's right there.
02:31All right, Sarah, do you have a guess?
02:33Is it like a chicken spirit?
02:35Oh, my God.
02:36Oh, my God.
02:36A chicken spirit.
02:39She's got it.
02:40Nice.
02:41Oh, my God.
02:42That's how you do it.
02:44Oh, my God.
02:45You're a champ.
02:46Nice.
02:47Take off your blindfold.
02:49Oh, she can't.
02:49I'm sorry.
02:51A cheese-covered chicken's foot.
02:53This is what you ate.
02:55Sarah, that's what you were eating, by the way.
02:59Sweet mother of God.
03:01Look on her faces.
03:02It's hideous.
03:04First time with a chicken foot?
03:06Yeah.
03:06All right.
03:07Well, we have $100 from Steak'Em Up.
03:09Congratulations, Sarah.
03:10All right, we need our next contestant up here.
03:12By the way, we have our authentic tub of cheese whiz ready to go now, Preston.
03:17Thank God for that.
03:18Hi.
03:19Have a seat.
03:19Have a seat.
03:20What's your name?
03:21Ashley.
03:22Ashley, where are you from?
03:23Warrington, PA.
03:24Warrington, PA.
03:25Bucks go.
03:26Yeah.
03:27Bucks go.
03:28All right.
03:28Put your blindfold on, Ashley.
03:30Let's get our next item up here.
03:32Yeah.
03:32And keep in mind, these things are all edible.
03:35Can you get a shot of this?
03:36Is there a chance?
03:37Hold up the sign, please, Julie, and show the audience what she's going to be eating.
03:44You guys see that?
03:45Okay.
03:46All right, Ashley.
03:47We are putting cheese whiz on the item right now.
03:50Oh, come on.
03:52There you go.
03:53Oh, my God.
03:53Nick is going to feed it to you.
03:55Open your mouth.
03:56Oh, my God.
03:57Oh, my God.
03:59Oh, my God.
04:01Oh, boy.
04:01It is.
04:02She's eating it.
04:03Oh, yeah.
04:04Yes, she is.
04:06How does it taste?
04:09Delicious.
04:09It's delicious, she says.
04:11Oh, my God.
04:12Do you want to spit it out or are you going to swallow it?
04:13I'm going to swallow it.
04:14Oh, my God.
04:16This is an amazing woman.
04:19Are you staying down all weekend?
04:21Is it like a pig's ear?
04:23Say that again.
04:24Is it a pig's ear?
04:26A pig's ear.
04:27A pig's ear?
04:29No, that is not it.
04:30But we will give you a clue.
04:31What is our clue, Steve?
04:32Our clue is what you just taste tested will rock you like a hurricane.
04:40What you just tasted will rock you like a hurricane.
04:45Do you know who does that song?
04:47Is it ACDC?
04:50Say it again.
04:51Is it ACDC?
04:52It is not ACDC.
04:53Okay.
04:54So that's one clue out.
04:55So we'll give you another clue.
04:57You can still win $50.
04:58What's our second clue?
04:59All right.
04:59Our second clue is this is the only creepy crawly with its own zodiac sign.
05:06This is the only creepy crawly with its own zodiac sign.
05:11Zodiac sign?
05:12Yeah.
05:13I'm a cancer.
05:13A crab.
05:14Okay.
05:15I'm a crab.
05:16I'm a zodiac sign.
05:16I'm a zodiac sign.
05:17The only creepy crawly with its own zodiac sign.
05:22Well, she said she's a cancer, which is a crab, and that's kind of a creepy crawly, but
05:25it's not that one.
05:26It's a different one.
05:28It's a different creepy crawly.
05:29Yeah, kind of like a crab, to be honest.
05:31Terrible at horoscopes.
05:34All right.
05:34We're going to give you five seconds.
05:36Cricket?
05:36Say a cricket.
05:37No.
05:38All right.
05:39I'm a Gemini.
05:40You're a cricket.
05:41One more clue.
05:42All right.
05:43This predatory arachnid is the king of scratching its own ass.
05:49A scorpion.
05:52A scorpion.
05:54That's correct.
05:56Well worth the $25.
05:57Nice job.
05:59Yeah, right?
06:00Is that what she got?
06:01$25?
06:01$25, bucks.
06:02All right.
06:03And she got to eat a scorpion on stage.
06:04Thank you, Ashley.
06:06By the way, her breath really stinks after that.
06:09Oh, my God.
06:09I like scorpion.
06:11Honestly, Preston, I did not think she would swallow that.
06:14All right.
06:14Who do we have here?
06:14What's your name?
06:15I'm Danielle.
06:16Where are you from, Danielle?
06:17Belmar, New Jersey.
06:18She's a Jersey girl.
06:20We're covering various edible things in Cheez Whiz and feeding them to our contestants.
06:26All right.
06:27Let's hold up, Julie, and show the audience.
06:29Oh, God.
06:30Show the audience.
06:31Oh, my God.
06:32Nick is pulling up the Cheez Whiz.
06:33He's going to dump some on one of these.
06:36Oh, I can smell it.
06:38I know.
06:38It smells horrible.
06:41Is it hot?
06:41It's just.
06:44Okay.
06:44Open your mouth.
06:47Oh, my God.
06:49Nick's folding it up.
06:50All right.
06:51Danielle, just take a little bite of that.
06:54All right.
06:57How does it taste?
06:59Like chicken?
07:00Like chicken.
07:01Wow.
07:02Okay.
07:03Now, it's a little bit.
07:04It's not chicken.
07:06It's going to be hard texture-wise to figure this out, but if you were to take a guess
07:09what you're eating, and keep in mind that it's less than appetizing, what might it be?
07:13Is it like goat balls or something?
07:16Goat balls.
07:17Goat balls.
07:18Not out of the realm of possibility, but that's incorrect.
07:21Steve.
07:21All right.
07:21Here's your first clue.
07:22Here's a clue.
07:23This is where the little piggy puts the Q-tip.
07:27Is it a pig's ear?
07:28Yes, it is.
07:32$75 prize from Stake'Em Up.
07:35Congratulations.
07:36All right.
07:37Next.
07:38So, I think we have two more.
07:39We're going to do more.
07:40What's your name?
07:41Shannon.
07:41Where are you from, Shannon?
07:43Sicklerville, New Jersey.
07:44Sicklerville, New Jersey.
07:45Another Jersey girl.
07:46I love it.
07:47Our calendar girl, Julie, is going to hold up a sign to show what we are going to be feeding her.
07:54All right.
07:54Go ahead, if you will.
07:55All right.
07:56We've shown the audience.
07:57You can hear from their reaction.
07:59Now, we're going to need a spoon or something, Nick.
08:02Because you want to get every last drop.
08:04No.
08:04Nick says, I'm going to use my hands.
08:07All right.
08:08Fair enough.
08:11We have a spoon now.
08:12Oh, we have a spoon.
08:13We have a spoon.
08:14There you go.
08:15We're not savages.
08:16All right, Shannon.
08:17Open your mouth, please.
08:19She's opening her mouth.
08:20Nick is taking the spoonful.
08:22And go ahead.
08:24All right.
08:25She is slightly grimaced.
08:26Doesn't look repulsed.
08:28She's kind of, she's going, oh, this ain't too bad.
08:30How does it taste, Shannon?
08:32Like cheese whiz.
08:33Like cheese whiz.
08:34No problem.
08:35But do you feel a little texture in there?
08:38Definitely crunchy.
08:39All right.
08:40Crunchy.
08:41And if you were to guess as to what we fed you, what do you think it is?
08:47Cricket legs?
08:49Cricket legs.
08:49Yes, that's it.
08:51We'll take it.
08:51Yes.
08:52Yes.
08:53100 bucks.
08:54Crickets.
08:55Well done.
08:57$100 from Steak'em Up.
08:59Nick, you know, you can have that.
09:00Nick, Nick, could you do me a favor?
09:02Put some crickets in the pigs here.
09:04I'll have a little taco.
09:05I haven't had any breakfast yet.
09:07Wow.
09:08You know which one to do, right?
09:10Yeah.
09:10Okay.
09:10All right.
09:10Have a seat here, bud.
09:11All right.
09:14What's your name?
09:15Dan.
09:16Where are you from, Dan?
09:16Amla.
09:17So, so far we've had crickets, chicken feet, pig ear, and scorpion.
09:22And I will tell you that we've saved the best for last, Dan.
09:24Screwed.
09:25Yeah, you're screwed.
09:26But do you have a pretty solid stomach?
09:29No, not at all.
09:29Okay.
09:30This will be interesting.
09:31Put your blindfold on.
09:32Preston backstage, he was the one who was most afraid that he would throw up.
09:35Oh, no.
09:36Yep.
09:36So have that bucket ready.
09:37Oh, my God.
09:39Okay.
09:39Thank you very much.
09:41I want the crowd to see this.
09:46Oh, sweet mother of God.
09:49Yeah, that's real.
09:51And edible.
09:52All right.
09:52We're stirring up the cheese.
09:55Nick is going to ladle it onto one of these.
09:57Oh, my God.
09:58It needs a lot of cheese, man.
10:01All right.
10:01There it is.
10:02Whiz with what?
10:03We got it covered in whiz.
10:04You got to tell us what it is.
10:06Now, part of this, I don't think this part is edible.
10:08But he can try it.
10:10Tell him to be careful.
10:11What's that, Kath?
10:12Like, don't chomp down on it.
10:13Yeah, just kind of take it in your mouth.
10:15You don't want to chew it up too much.
10:17Suck on it a little bit.
10:20Oh, he's gagging.
10:22We got a bucket at your feet in case you need it.
10:26He's not doing well.
10:27Want another bite?
10:29You want another bite?
10:30Yeah, he does want it.
10:31Oh, my God.
10:32He's going back in for seconds.
10:33No.
10:33This is repulsive.
10:34Nothing would be worth this.
10:35By the way, Marissa almost refused to bring this here.
10:38Yes, but she's a vegetarian.
10:40Yeah, and okay, it is a kind of meat.
10:44We will tell you that.
10:45It's such a hard time.
10:46All right, Dan, any idea from the texture what that is?
10:52Oh, my God.
10:53He's gagging.
10:53Oh, he's going to throw up.
10:54He's gagging.
10:54Get him a bucket.
10:56It's right in front of him.
10:56Right at his feet.
10:58He was chewing.
10:59All right.
10:59I have no idea what it is.
11:00You have no idea?
11:01Nah, not even this.
11:02All right, you want a hint?
11:04All right, he'll take a clue.
11:05All right, here's your hint.
11:06It is the quacker attacher.
11:09The quacker attacher.
11:13What goes quack?
11:14Quack, quack.
11:16Duck beak.
11:18What did you say?
11:19Duck beak.
11:19A duck beak will take it.
11:22Yeah!
11:24It's a duck head.
11:26An entire head.
11:27Take off your blindfold.
11:29Show him, Nick.
11:30Preston, he had this moment of recognition and ultra incredible horror.
11:37He's like, yeah, I won.
11:38Oh, my God.
11:39I can't believe I put it in my mouth.
11:41It was an entire duck's head.
11:44We have actually five of them right here.
11:47It looks delicious.
11:47Does it look?
11:49I mean, it looks appetizing.
11:51Hey, we got, you did win.
11:53We got 75 bucks for you, courtesy of Stake'Em Up, so congratulations.
11:56Hey, listen, how many of us have not woken up and said, what did I put in my mouth last night?
12:02Hey, who wants a duck head?
12:05Anybody?
12:06Yeah, look at everybody.
12:07Everybody's lining right up.
12:08Dear God.
12:10Cheese-covered duck heads, right?
12:11Steve, I'll be able to sell these at the beach.
12:13Yeah, Steve.
12:14Cheese-covered duck heads?
12:15Cheese-covered duck heads?
12:16Oh, it can't be actual duck heads.
12:18It's probably fried bread.
12:19Fudgy-wudgy bars?
12:20Duck heads.
12:21We got it all.
12:21Duck heads?
12:22Duck heads.
12:23Duck heads.
12:25So thank you to Marissa who went to, she went to like an Asian market, a world market,
12:29and actually saw these things in the case.
12:32They are edible.
12:33You can actually, they're some kind of cuisine and God knows what culture.
12:37But we used them for a stupid game to give away some prizes.
12:41Horrifying.
12:41Yeah.
12:42Horrifying.
12:42But these guys were champs.
12:44Round of applause for our contestants, everybody.
12:46Yeah.