Dave & Chuck the Freak talk were about elderly people drinking Mountain Dew and how James thinks that could end up being him one day. Then, an accidental sound effect from Dave leads to James calculating how long he has before he dies.
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00:00white trash alert
00:08does someone in your family have a bad habit that's like so out of control
00:15you have to take stuff away from them and hide it
00:18like chuck what kind of habit like you had hostess cupcakes
00:23like your wife used to hide stuff right yes or wouldn't bring it into the house
00:28yep well um a 64 year old woman in north carolina
00:34still lives with her dad okay so she's 64 her dad they don't give his age but
00:43quite elderly yeah yeah 80 something she didn't like her dad drinking mountain dew
00:51i love it do the do
00:54not the best drink for an old man i assume
00:58i feel great you gotta calm him down dad did you do the do again he's always doing the do
01:07yeah listen to his heart listen to his heart monitor
01:09man i i guess there's a lot of people out there that you know
01:16are addicted to do you know old people that are guzzling down
01:19two liters of sugary beverages every day this is gonna be me in 20 years
01:24oh james no you want to keep your feet
01:26you don't have to give it up eventually james i mean it is it is one of these things like you
01:31you there will come a time when they say you can't well that's i don't know
01:37caffeine yeah teeth
01:39where's the tallest building i can't have that system
01:42oh my god
01:44yep yeah you'll have no teeth you'll lose your lower extremities to diabetes
01:51you don't need teeth dave
01:52then we okay so we know a guy who honestly like james that was him
01:57really worked with the guy you not brush him he drank in front of us every day in the break room
02:03a two liter oh wow of of coke yeah a full giant bag of chips yes and then he eventually lost his legs
02:12to diabetes oh yeah and i know who you're talking about yeah i buy legs well okay um you know when
02:19the doctor says hey if you don't do this some real terrible stuff's gonna happen
02:26he just said i don't care what you think
02:29oh that's crazy yeah i know you're right and you know what happened after
02:34all of the terrible things that the doctor said like blind
02:37no legs oh my god he's blind and he's got no legs yeah well he's gone
02:42they gotta put that on the cans man i'm sorry
02:44i thought that was one of those old calculators
02:53i didn't know what james was doing he was like james is hit a sound of taxes in there what the hell
03:02i'm just calculating how many hours i have left before i lose my legs and i go blind from drinking
03:07too many caffeinated beverages
03:08what that sounds like it is a little bit gone yeah
03:11i mean that is different that one sounds like it got different yeah off the top i guess i didn't know what
03:17it was i was hearing it's like oh he's calculating oh wait we caught james during some calculations
03:22according to my calculations i got 20 27 before i have to really worry about
03:27my teeth will start falling out around that time yeah i can still think about it
03:32he calculates hard
03:34old school calculator i know the sound i love those calculators let's find the actual sound of old
03:43school it would print it off whether or not those are the only calculators we have available in the
03:47building oh yeah you're right yeah no the we need the one where it has this print no it was like a
03:54printable no the one with the printer there was one there was a calculator with a printer yeah
04:01yeah like this oh that might be oh yeah that might be it here
04:10oh these guys got it 45 mountain dews 365 days
04:18divide that by 12 multiply by the doctor factor and james will die at oh boy much sooner than i thought
04:28oh yeah yeah james done he's done the numbers it's not looking good
04:40james it's time to stop it's like i can't see him so i don't you know i'm like maybe he's in there
04:44calculating honestly i thought that james was playing the sound effect
04:50i was like what is james james added this to what he's saying he's calculating our jokes
04:56let him work the numbers are off
05:06the album's death calculator he keeps it by his desk at all times every time i take a sip of pop i gotta
05:10add it add to the calculator it's true you gotta hit plus one every every step
05:18plus one ah nice ice cold refreshing glass of diet pepsi open the bottle goop goop goop oh james here
05:26you want to drink this yeah i'm gonna add that and three bottles today yeah do that and
05:33dave davis found calculators from like 1950s like none of them are the exact like none of them are
05:43the one we're talking about let's see this is one that's it that's more like that's more like it
05:50intense that'd be like me on a calculator i'm very intense with anything i have to punch it's true
05:57yeah quite aggressive more door you have to open yep yeah someone said a guy i work with told me he
06:03hasn't drank water in five months he only drinks the dew how what is that that's part of life that's
06:10an evolution if we could see when are we expected all right he only drinks to do
06:19five years five years okay let's add the doctor factor in there
06:23uh-huh yeah okay oh he's got about four days left with your feet it's not good better go see the