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00:00Transcription by CastingWords
00:30CastingWords
01:00Jim Lang
01:02Wick Martindale
01:04Chuck Willery
01:06Charles Nelson Reilly
01:08and Brett Summers
01:10Jimmy Walker
01:12Kathy Griffin
01:16Mark Ball
01:18Hollywood Square
01:20And this week's Center Square, Peter Marshall
01:24We got the best and most plays from coast to coast
01:26And I don't wanna boast
01:28It's Hollywood Square Bears
01:30And Rod Roddy
01:32And here's your host, Tom Bergeron
01:34Thank you, Rod
01:36Thank you
01:38What a great week this has been
01:40A lot of fun
01:42You know, Jeffrey Tambor, we gave him a chance to rest his vocal chords
01:44Rod Roddy's been filling in
01:46The Price is Right
01:48And it has been a distinct pleasure to have as our Center Square this week
01:52The original master of the Hollywood Square is Peter Marshall
01:55Thank you, Tom
01:56Thank you
01:58Our returning champion got eight grand out of King World yesterday
02:02Steve Polite is back
02:04Hi, Steve
02:05And he's fine
02:06Yes, sir
02:07Okay, that's a burden to have to deal with your whole life
02:09Shonda Williamson, Ms. Circle, good to have you here
02:12Welcome
02:13Thank you
02:14All right
02:15You know, it's a tic-tac-toe game
02:17You have to decide if the answers the stars are giving are correct
02:20Or they're just making them up
02:21That's how you get the squares
02:22First game is worth $1,000
02:24And Shonda, as the challenger, you kick it off
02:27I'll take Kathy Griffin, please
02:29Kathy Griffin appearing on the celebrity edition of The Mole
02:32Airing in January on ABC
02:34All right
02:35Kathy, ABC News has reported that chairmakers have noticed how the average American backside has changed
02:40They say a man's behind has gotten bigger
02:43What's happened to a woman's behind?
02:46Okay, don't go to the gym for one week and you're already on my ass
02:50All right, I'm gonna say a woman's has gotten smaller
02:57I'll agree
02:58No
02:59No
03:00That was wishful thinking
03:01X gets the square
03:03All right, Steve
03:04Let's go with Peter Marshall, please
03:05Peter Marshall
03:06Thank you
03:07Thank you, Steve
03:08Get onto his website, boysinger.com if you want an autographed copy of his book
03:13Thank you
03:14Backstage with the original Hollywood school
03:15Boysinger.com, that's it
03:16Because metal was scarce during World War II, Peter, these prizes were little men made of plaster
03:22What were they?
03:23Now listen, believe me, Steve
03:25They were Oscars
03:26Trust me on this
03:27I'll disagree
03:28It was the trust me on this that made you disagree, wasn't it?
03:31Yes
03:32They were Oscars
03:33Circle
03:34Gets the square
03:36All right, Shonda
03:38Bob Eubanks, please
03:39Bob Eubanks
03:40His website, 5easyspeakers.com
03:44In what movie did Richard Dawson play the host of a futuristic game show in which Arnold Schwarzenegger is his unwilling contestant?
03:51God
03:52I think it was The Predator
03:54I'll disagree
03:55The Running Man is what it was
03:57Circle gets that one
03:58Steve
03:59Jim Lang for the block
04:01Jim Lang, host of The Dating Game
04:03Jim, when the Quaker Oats Company tried putting this cartoon character in its ads, the real Quakers objected because they said he's violent and they're passive
04:13What character?
04:14It was Wile E. Coyote
04:15It was Wile E. Coyote
04:16They used Wile E. Coyote and they said he was too violent
04:19Okay
04:20I'll agree
04:21Popeye
04:22Popeye
04:23I'm sorry, Steve
04:24Shonda, can't give you that one, you have to earn it yourself
04:26Jim Lang for the win, please
04:27For the win and a thousand dollars, all right, Jim
04:30In 1971, which show debuted with a warning that begins, the program you are about to see seeks to throw a humorous spotlight on our frailties, prejudices and concerns?
04:39Uh, you know, the show that I remember that had that kind of warning, especially in the early days, was Laugh-In
04:45I'll agree
04:46No, All in the Family
04:47With Archie Bunker and Company
04:49X gets that one, Steve, you're still in this
04:51Jimmy Walker for the win
04:52Jimmy Walker has a website too, dynamitejj.com
04:57Jimmy, which Steven Spielberg movie used the ad line, Everybody Runs?
05:02Everybody Runs would have to be Jaws
05:05I disagree
05:06Minority Report with Tom Cruise, X gets it
05:09And the win for a thousand dollars
05:13All right, we're gonna go right into a secret square game
05:16The game itself is worth a thousand dollars
05:18We already have almost ten grand in the secret square stash
05:21But Rod Roddy and the lovely Carol Merrill will tell us what we're adding today
05:26Move over Tiger Woods, it's a brand new set of golf clubs
05:32Ten stickers, quality made golf clubs
05:36TPW3, oversized metal woods and irons
05:38with deluxe golf bag
05:40Innovative design and sound engineering
05:42The professional's choice from Pinziger
05:44And you'll be needing those clubs for your spa vacation in Miami
05:51You and a guest will spend four nights at the luxurious Doral Golf Resort & Spa
05:55Featuring the legendary Blue Monster Golf Course
05:58Enjoy the resort's five restaurants, 11 tennis courts, and world-renowned spa
06:03An extraordinary vacation for two worth $7,191
06:09Thank you Rod, thank you Carol
06:11Let all of you at home who the secret square is
06:14Okay, now you know, Steve and you start
06:17We'll go with Peter Marshall
06:18All right, good enough
06:22Peter, does the average CEO make more money in a day than the average worker does in a year?
06:28Well, in this day and age I think they'd have to, I mean bail alone
06:34You know, I think the average CEO makes more in a year than most guys make in a lifetime
06:39So I would say yes, I mean Jack Welch made $400 million, this guy made $300 million
06:44I think on the average they would make much more than the average guy
06:46Yes, I'll agree
06:47Yes, that's very true
06:48All right, X gets it
06:50We'll come right back, give you more time to think about your choice
06:53Hollywood Squares will continue, it says so in my contract
06:58Square means, Square means Hollywood Squares
07:02As if
07:13Promotional consideration, furnished by the following
07:17Vaporub, the Quake Vicks
07:32Vaporub, the Quake Vicks
07:34As if you're looking for a single person
07:48Yeah, we're not even ready to go
07:50I don't have that fucking problem
07:52I hope it's worth it
07:53I think it's worth it
07:56If I'm looking for a single person
07:57I'm looking for a single person
07:59Welcome back.
08:24We're going to get back to our secret square game in a moment.
08:25I want to get Chuck Woolery to mention this.
08:28I'm not a fisherman, and I was calling it the disco fish,
08:31and that's not what it is.
08:33It's a moto-lure.
08:34It is a moto-lure, M-O-T-O-lure.com.
08:37A bass fisherman's best friend.
08:40Really?
08:41Because the little shaking fish butt lures the other fish.
08:45They just jump all over it.
08:47But it's suitable for all kinds of parties, too.
08:51Hey, before we get back to our secret square game,
08:53let's give our contestants a chance to say,
08:55hi, Ms. Circle, Shonda Williamson.
08:57Why don't you tell us about yourself?
08:58Well, I'm originally from Oakland, California.
09:00I'm a graphic designer, and I love to play basketball.
09:03In fact, I played in an all-males basketball team
09:05called the X-Men and Woman.
09:07Hey, very nice.
09:08Very cool.
09:09And our returning champion, Steve Polite.
09:12Steve, remind us about yourself.
09:14I'm a bodily injury claims adjuster from El Cajon, California.
09:17In my spare time, I do some work for the United Way to help raise money.
09:20All right.
09:21Good enough.
09:22Steve, good to have you back.
09:24All right, Shonda.
09:25I'll take Kathy Griffin.
09:26Kathy Griffin.
09:27All right.
09:29Kathy?
09:30Yes.
09:31Is it true we wouldn't have tequila if it weren't for bats?
09:36I am just going to say in the tradition of a crazy Hollywood Squares question,
09:40I'm going to say true.
09:41I agree.
09:42They pollinate the agave plant.
09:43Yes, it's true.
09:44That's right.
09:45Circle gets that one.
09:47Steve?
09:48Let's go Chuck Woolery.
09:49Chuck Woolery!
09:51Chuck, what TV show's theme stated,
09:54don't do the crime if you can't do the time?
09:59Oh, is that Robert Blake and that?
10:04He's doing some kind of, he's all over the news.
10:06He must be doing some new TV thing.
10:08I don't know.
10:09I believe, I believe that was Dragnet.
10:12I disagree.
10:13It's Beretta starring Robert Blake.
10:15Yeah, Robert Blake.
10:16You disagree.
10:17That gets the square.
10:19Ain't life ironic.
10:20Shonda.
10:21Wink Martindale for the block.
10:22Wink Martindale.
10:24Host of High Rollers and Tic Tac Go.
10:28Wink who sang, Touch Me in the Morning, Upside Down, and It's My Turn.
10:34Pat Boone.
10:35Okay.
10:36Diana Ross.
10:37Diana Ross.
10:38Circle gets the block.
10:39All right, Steve.
10:40Martin Mall for the block.
10:41Martin Mall.
10:42All right, Martin.
10:43What does Ohio mean in Japanese?
10:50Well, I'm pretty sure they don't have a word for fork.
10:53Um, they have over 400 words for camera, so I'm going to say, uh, I'm going to say camera.
11:05I disagree.
11:06No, it means good morning.
11:07Oh, good morning.
11:08Edge gets the square.
11:10We get a break.
11:11We'll be right back with Game Show Week on Hollywood Squares right after this.
11:16Everybody get up!
11:18It's the movie with Squares!
11:22Pinch.
11:23P-I-N-C-H.
11:28Are you kidding?
11:29Pinky.
11:30I can't believe this.
11:31Did you really have...
11:32Don't be sneezy.
11:33Don't be sneezy.
11:34Thank you for filling in the other players.
11:37Promotional consideration furnished by the following.
11:40Think you know how to survive a shark attack?
11:42A tornado.
11:43The answers will surprise you in the worst-case scenario survival game from University Games.
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11:52Blistex Ointment.
11:53With medication to soothe and rejuvenate lips.
11:56Blistex Ointment.
11:57Discover what your lips are missing.
12:13That's all.
12:15Blestex Ointment.
12:16Blistex Ointment.
12:19Feminine Show.
12:20empty box débutings.
12:21Closed captioning provided by...
12:23just a few more.
12:24I should've used Preparation H.
12:26Preparenh H medicated wipes.
12:28Easier cause they're four times bigger than tux pads.
12:30Preparation H medicated wipes.
12:31Big relief!
12:33.
12:34Welcome back.
12:43All right.
12:44Might I mention we have a secret square?
12:45It's in one of four places, and it's worth over $17,000.
12:50Shonda, it's your turn.
12:51Jimmy Walker, please.
12:52Jimmy Walker.
12:53All right.
12:54For the diagonal block.
12:56Jimmy, why did bakers decide to put holes in the middle of donuts?
13:01Well, you know, it's almost like the farmer with the sheep.
13:05It does get a little cold in the bakery at night.
13:11Hey, we can get you out of here now.
13:14Big crowd's waiting.
13:16No, it's actually to save money on, on, on, on, so you can have more donuts per dough.
13:22I disagree.
13:23No, the setters always came out undercooked, so that's why that happened.
13:27Circle gets a block there.
13:29All right, Steve.
13:30Jim Lang for the block.
13:32Secret Square.
13:33Jim Lang.
13:35All right.
13:37You know, this Secret Square is worth over $17,000.
13:41Good luck, Steve.
13:42The girl in this picture won an Oscar as Helen Keller in The Miracle Worker, later won an Emmy
13:47as Helen's teacher.
13:49Is she Patty Duke, Tatum O'Neill, or Jodie Foster?
13:53I would say Jodie Foster.
13:55I disagree.
13:56You sure?
13:58Yes.
13:58Patty Duke.
13:59That's right.
14:02Congratulations, Steve.
14:05And you get the block.
14:06All right, Shonda, over to you.
14:08Bob, you guys for the block, please.
14:10For the block, Bob Eubanks.
14:11Okay.
14:11Newlywed games on Monday through Friday on the Game Show Network.
14:15Bob, what song begins, well, you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man.
14:20No time to talk.
14:22Country music star Merle Haggard, that was Okie from Muskogee.
14:26I disagree.
14:27Staying alive.
14:28Staying alive.
14:29Circle gets the block.
14:31All right, Steve.
14:32Charles Nelson Reilly and Brett Summers for the five-square win.
14:36The match game airing every day on the Game Show Network.
14:39According to legend, what did St. Patrick do to drive all the snakes out of Ireland?
14:47Go ahead, honey.
14:48He, uh, he sang.
14:53He sang?
14:55He sang?
14:57He prayed and sang.
14:59Can we get some vestige of an agreement down there?
15:04You booked us.
15:08Okay, he sang.
15:10He sang.
15:12I'll agree.
15:13Oh, that's a shame.
15:15He played the drum, is what he did.
15:19He played the drum.
15:19All right, Sean, I can't give you that one.
15:20You know this is harder than it was years ago.
15:23Yeah, yeah.
15:23Oh, yeah.
15:25That's the only one.
15:26Charles and Brett for the five-square win.
15:27Five-square win, right.
15:29Oh, you two.
15:32What did Bob Dylan do at the Newport Folk Festival in 1965 that made the crowd boo him?
15:40He showed up.
15:42What do I know?
15:44This was easier years ago under Peter Marshall.
15:47It was a simpler game.
15:49He sang.
15:50He sang a song, and I can't remember.
15:52What was the name of the drum?
15:53I don't know.
15:54Boba Loo.
15:55He sang Boba Loo, and they booed him.
15:57I disagree.
15:58He used an electric guitar at a folk festival, which was very controversial.
16:03That's right.
16:04I wish I had no idea.
16:04We have a tie game here.
16:07All right.
16:09Our tiebreaker game.
16:11We have no time for.
16:12You've each won a $1,000 game, so whoever has won the most squares in gameplay gets to control
16:18the tiebreaker question.
16:19And let's find out from Skippy Trebek, Alex's long-lost half-brother, who that is.
16:24Well, they both have the same number of squares, which means Shonda controls since she won the
16:28last game.
16:29All right.
16:29Well, there you go.
16:30We go.
16:30Just keep going down the rule book.
16:32And that's how that works.
16:33Shonda, do you want to take a chance, or do you want to pass it off to Steve?
16:36I'm going to play it.
16:37All right.
16:37Who do you want to pick?
16:37I want to go with Kathy Griffin.
16:39Kathy Griffin.
16:40This one's for the championship.
16:44Kathy, true or false, the 22nd Amendment limits the president to two consecutive terms
16:49of office.
16:50I'm going to say true.
16:53I disagree.
16:54True.
16:55It is true.
16:56X gets the square.
16:58Shonda, we're going to give you $1,000 in our thanks for being here.
17:02Sorry.
17:02I know that's hard.
17:03It's hard to lose like that, but you did a great job.
17:06But, Steve, you just sat back and watched your championship float back to you.
17:11$1,500 plus the secret square.
17:13You've done pretty well.
17:14Oh, yeah.
17:15You came very close yesterday to starting that car.
17:18You want to give it another go?
17:19Oh, yeah, you bet.
17:20Steve's back trying to start the car.
17:22Bonus round time right after this.
17:32You played well.
17:33I did okay.
17:34You'll beat them next time.
17:36They'll kill us.
17:38Sometimes, you just want to give a little more.
17:41You hungry?
17:42Why not start with dinner?
17:43Now, Stouffer's Skillet Sensations has 50% more juicy white meat chicken.
17:48Perfectly blended with crunchy vegetables, it's more like what you'd make yourself.
17:52Great.
17:53Let's practice.
17:54I had a feeling you'd say that.
17:56Stouffer's Skillet Sensations.
17:57Nothing comes close to the home.
18:02This is Halls.
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18:22Whenever you have a dry, scratchy throat, they'll give it a cooling lift.
18:26New Halls Fruit Breezers.
18:28Treat your throat.
18:29Can't find the time to eat right?
18:33Campbell's introduces new soup at hand.
18:36Four hot, satisfying soups in new sippable heat-and-go cups.
18:40It's amazing what you can do with new Campbell's soup at hand.
18:43Mm-mm, good.
18:46Anna?
18:56Polaroid film is good.
18:58I cherish these moments.
19:03Sharing the traditions that were passed down to me.
19:06It's what I was put on this earth to do.
19:12Ready Whip, let the fun out.
19:14Also in chocolate.
19:16Prego Traditional versus the leading pasta sauce.
19:19In the paperweight contest, both jars did exceptionally well.
19:23But the taste contest was no contest.
19:25As everyone in the family preferred Prego.
19:28Everyone goes for Prego.
19:31Watch Queen Latifah, Little Richard, Anna Nicole Smith,
19:35Triumph the Insult Comic Dog,
19:36and Center Square Ellen DeGeneres
19:38next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:40We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:41We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:41We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:41We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:42We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:43We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:43We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:44We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:45We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:46We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
19:46We'll see you next week on the new Hollywood Squares.
20:47Thank you, Rod.
21:03By the way, Steve, you'll be happy to know, even if you get the wrong key, Carol managed to hotwire it during the commercial.
21:08So, very multi-talented Carol, Merrill.
21:12Up to now, we found out a little bit about what the stars know.
21:14Here's where we find out how much you know about them.
21:18You've got to pick a square.
21:19I'll read a statement about the star.
21:20If you agree or disagree correctly, you get the square.
21:23At the end of 30 seconds, for every square you've won, we'll take away a bad key, improving your odds of starting the car.
21:28Let's put 30 seconds on the clock for Steve.
21:31It starts ticking when you pick your first star.
21:33Kathy Griffin.
21:34Kathy's maid of honor was Brooke Shields.
21:35I disagree.
21:36Wrong.
21:37Next.
21:37Jim Lang.
21:38Was a disc jockey before, during, and after hosting the dating game.
21:40I agree.
21:41Right.
21:41Next.
21:41Jimmy Walker.
21:42Gave a commencement speech at Harvard.
21:43I agree.
21:44Wrong.
21:44Next.
21:45Wink Martindale.
21:45Shortest run of 19 game shows he hosted was Watch Her Spin.
21:49I disagree.
21:49Right.
21:50Next.
21:50Peter Marshall.
21:51Co-wrote an anti-marijuana movie starring Fabian.
21:53I disagree.
21:54Wrong.
21:55Next.
21:55Chuck Woolery.
21:56Appeared on the Merv Griffin Show as a singer.
21:58I agree.
21:58Right.
21:59Next.
21:59Martin Maul.
22:00Played a young George Burns in a movie about his life.
22:02I agree.
22:03Wrong.
22:03Next.
22:03Bob Eubank.
22:04Produced.
22:05Oh, we're out of time.
22:06All right.
22:06Okay.
22:07Let's go count some keys here, Steve.
22:09Get right down here.
22:16Thank you, Beryl.
22:17How are you, Steve?
22:18All right.
22:18Now, the good news is it's your second time here as champion, so immediately we're going
22:22to take away one of the bad keys.
22:25And then you got three right in 30 seconds.
22:27We'll take away three more.
22:28Okay.
22:31I know it might look a little daunting, but we've seen people pick the right one with
22:34more keys up there.
22:35Give it a good go.
22:38This is for, again, my wife of five years who announced me just the other day we're expecting
22:42another child.
22:43Oh, congratulations.
22:44So, let's do it.
22:55Come on out here.
22:56Come on out here, Steve.
22:58All right.
22:59All right.
22:59Well, let's take a look at which key would have started the car.
23:03This one up here.
23:04I'll tell you what, though, even though you didn't get the car, for the new baby, here's
23:09the moto lure.
23:10Every kid loves these.
23:15That's always fun.
23:16You have so far as champion $29,666, and you'll come back to defend your championship again.
23:25It's been a pleasure.
23:26Hey, how about a hand?
23:27Hey, how about a hand?
23:28And Caramel, Rob Rowdy, all our stars, and especially Keenan Marshall, our center square.
23:35It's been a wonderful week.
23:36Thank you all so much.
23:38On behalf of all our stars, I'm Tom Bergeron.
23:40Have a great weekend.
23:41And we'll see you on Monday on Hollywood Square for a while.
23:44Let's race the piano.
23:45Oh, it's wonderful.
23:47And Rob Rowdy sings so long.
23:51Promotional consideration furnished by the following.
23:53Armatron.
23:55For him, for her.
23:57Impeccable styling.
23:58Outstanding quality.
24:00And value.
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24:04I want my family to eat healthy.
24:06They want great taste.
24:08That's why I only use Eggland's Best Eggs.
24:10Eggland's Best has it all.
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24:14A cold sort's coming.
24:16How long will it last?
24:17Heal it with Abreva.
24:19It speeds healing so you're you again faster.
24:21Abreva.
24:21Speeds healing like a prescription.
24:23Without one.
24:25Yes, this is Linda.
24:27I live in North Carolina.
24:29Tom always sits down.
24:31All of the stars sit down.
24:33But the contestants have to stand up for 30 minutes.
24:3630 minutes is the right good long time to stand on your feet,
24:40especially if you have any medical problems.
24:43Hi, I'm Jeffrey Bader from Alexandria, Virginia.
24:47When it says H2, it means H squared.
24:51If it were a number of 5 squared or 6 squared.
24:55But it's an 8, so it's 8 squared.
24:57Quite ingenious.
24:59Tell Tom to get his act together.
25:02Hi, my name is Rick Schwartz.
25:03I live in Fresno, California.
25:06You have a great show.
25:07Hilarious, great guests, celebrities, fantastic.
25:11Congratulations on a hit show.
25:14But how do I become a contestant?
25:16The Attention element.
25:23Shin.
25:24That's all!
25:25Dealer.
25:25You're right.
25:26Wait, we're going to have a table.
25:28Go go casi.
25:28Do you go okay?
25:30Who can you make me?
25:31I don't like you.
25:31I don't like you.
25:31I don't like you.
25:32You're right.
25:33I'm here in town.
25:34I don't like you.
25:35I don't like you.
25:36I don't like you.
25:37I don't like you.
25:38I don't like you.
25:38I don't like you.
25:39I don't like you.
25:41Was like me.