the leo complete cartoons series
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00:00Five years, some of you seven, and now you're the big kids!
00:00:04I hope everyone's met our class pets, Leonardo and Squirtle.
00:00:07I'm not touching those things.
00:00:09Don't they eat, sleep, and poo in the same place?
00:00:12Hey, I poo where he sleeps.
00:00:14Now what if I told you there's a big reward at the end of this year if you do well in class?
00:00:19The academicathlon thing?
00:00:20Look at her work these kids.
00:00:22Salinas, what a pro.
00:00:23Best seats Miss Palacky in the 60s.
00:00:26And what if I told you this year's winning class
00:00:29gets a field trip to somewhere special for a whole day?
00:00:35Salinas having a baby?
00:00:36The belly's popping a little.
00:00:38Oh, Zane, I'm afraid you can't bring snacks into the class.
00:00:41I'll hold those just for now.
00:00:43Cheetos, wow, didn't see that coming.
00:00:45Now, at the end of the year, our three fifth grade classes compete in art,
00:00:50debating, science, and history.
00:00:52And if our class wins, we get a trip to Magic Land Park.
00:00:57Don't they have the dragon coaster?
00:00:59I heard it called fire once.
00:01:00Yeah, it was banned in Europe.
00:01:02Yes, but not in Florida.
00:01:05Yep, having a baby.
00:01:06Okay, let's see how much you guys already know.
00:01:09Who knows what you call it when a plant converts light to food?
00:01:14The conversion is photosynthesis, turning water and CO2 into glucose.
00:01:20Excellent job, Mia.
00:01:23Oh, so...
00:01:25Oh, boy, divorced parents.
00:01:27Okay, honey, thank you.
00:01:28You're okay.
00:01:29So sweet.
00:01:31Okay, let's look at some of the books we're going to read in class this year.
00:01:35Who's heard of Charlotte's Web?
00:01:37Oh, no, the kids always cry at the end.
00:01:40But kids don't cry enough?
00:01:41We got to trigger the little garden hoses?
00:01:43Crying's for weaklings.
00:01:44Right.
00:01:45We'll meet Fern and her pet Wilbur.
00:01:47It's a stupid book anyway.
00:01:49Right, animals never talk to people.
00:01:51Plus, no one gets to eat, Charlotte.
00:01:53You just have to hear about this delicious spider for days and get hungry thinking about it.
00:01:58Like you guys will learn this year.
00:02:00Sorry, Cole?
00:02:01Is there something you want to share with everyone?
00:02:11Sorry, guys.
00:02:13Man, that smells good.
00:02:14Send some of that our way next time.
00:02:16Getting sick of the lettuce.
00:02:21Hi, I'm Cole Wasecki's mom.
00:02:26Oh, hi.
00:02:27Can I just, real quick, for Facebook?
00:02:29Thanks.
00:02:31Cole is a very...
00:02:32That's gonna look great.
00:02:34Since when do people want to look like ducks?
00:02:37Isn't that something, how they've grown?
00:02:39And in fifth grade, you'll find your kids wanting to make their own choices.
00:02:43Embrace it.
00:02:44Let them make their own mistakes.
00:02:45How long does this go?
00:02:47Not terribly long, Dr. Wenger.
00:02:48Now, some of you may have heard about Mrs. Salina's incident in class.
00:02:53First, I want to confirm it has nothing to do with anything she ate in the school cafeteria.
00:02:58She's just going to be taking some time off.
00:03:00A leave, let's say.
00:03:02Wait, for how long?
00:03:03Here comes the bomb.
00:03:05For, uh, until she has the baby, let's say.
00:03:09Having a baby?
00:03:11Are you sure?
00:03:12Did she get a second opinion?
00:03:13Are you kidding me?
00:03:14This is what happened in third grade.
00:03:16The substitute was awful.
00:03:17I'm texting my daughter right now.
00:03:19She'll be devastated.
00:03:22OMG, we are going to destroy the substitute.
00:03:25It's like a free year.
00:03:27But don't we want to win the field trip?
00:03:29Seriously?
00:03:30Come on, we can tell the substitute that recess lasts three hours.
00:03:33We can chew rubber bands at her, throw gummies at her, glue her to her chair.
00:03:37Please take me off this jet.
00:03:40Yo, Cole, we can switch our names and not tell her.
00:03:42That's awesome, Cole.
00:03:44We'll just watch movies all day.
00:03:45Yeah, like the one where the little kid sees a fortune-telling machine and turns into Tom Hanks.
00:03:49And then he dances on the piano thing, and now I'm forgetting the name.
00:03:51How weird is that?
00:03:51I know it's like a short name because when I saw it on a poster it-
00:03:54Big.
00:03:55Please take me off this jet.
00:04:00Look at these lazy class pets.
00:04:02Do they even move?
00:04:03I'd like that job.
00:04:04That lizard looks pretty old.
00:04:06Do I look old?
00:04:11It's a tuatara.
00:04:12They live a long time, until about 75.
00:04:14Hmm, never knew that.
00:04:16Suck on that, hamsters.
00:04:18Wow, looks like he's getting close to that.
00:04:23Ah, he's nuts.
00:04:24I mean, you're old and cranky and lazy, but no way does that make you 75.
00:04:2875, 75, 75.
00:04:531949.
00:04:55What about it?
00:04:55I was born around then.
00:04:57How many years has it been since 1949?
00:04:59No idea.
00:05:00That's addition.
00:05:01They learned that in the second grade.
00:05:02We're all about fractions.
00:05:03Great.
00:05:04Why can't they move us around a little so we can know more?
00:05:14Okay, four sixteenths equals how many fourths?
00:05:20She's leaving.
00:05:20They don't hear a word she's saying.
00:05:23What are you doing?
00:05:24Trying to count how many years old I am.
00:05:261968, 1969, 1970.
00:05:29I'm out of toes and fingies.
00:05:30What else can I count with?
00:05:32I'll tell you, but there's kids around.
00:05:35I was talking about his tail.
00:05:38I'm dishing.
00:05:38I gotta talk to some second grade pets.
00:05:41Forget it.
00:05:41We only see those pets at fire drills, and they don't happen until November.
00:05:46What the?
00:05:50Is this a fire drill?
00:05:51It's probably nothing, but let's get going.
00:05:53Anthony, why don't you grab the pets?
00:05:57Everyone evacuate!
00:05:58Stop!
00:06:01I think I'm on fire!
00:06:05We just redecorated!
00:06:07Someday cops are gonna carry that kid off a plate.
00:06:10I'll park right over here, fellas.
00:06:13All right, here we go.
00:06:15Hey, guys.
00:06:15How was your summer?
00:06:16Do anything fun?
00:06:18Sleep.
00:06:19Sleep.
00:06:20Eat.
00:06:20A lot of pooping.
00:06:22Terrific.
00:06:23Say, who's second grade again?
00:06:25That's me.
00:06:26How you doing, Lizzie?
00:06:27Great.
00:06:27I'm actually Leonardo.
00:06:29Lizzie's the iguana in Mr. Marculia's homeroom.
00:06:32You're?
00:06:32I'm Cinnabon.
00:06:33I know, so corny.
00:06:35Just got renamed again.
00:06:36Oh, well, beats Thumper.
00:06:38I guess.
00:06:39What's really bad are the hair ones, like Harebrain, Hare Peas, Harry Potter.
00:06:43Right, right.
00:06:44Hey, the second graders, you guys do addition, right?
00:06:47Hair clip.
00:06:48Hair clip for men.
00:06:49Yes, and subtraction.
00:06:50We do both.
00:06:51Great.
00:06:51Okay, look.
00:06:52If I got here in 1949 and it's 2023, what does that make me?
00:06:58Oh, I know this one.
00:07:00A reptile.
00:07:01Schmuck.
00:07:03Okay, everyone.
00:07:04It was a false alarm.
00:07:05The school is not on fire.
00:07:11No.
00:07:11How old would I be?
00:07:13No.
00:07:13Right.
00:07:13Subtraction.
00:07:14Okay.
00:07:1674.
00:07:1774.
00:07:18Isn't that right before?
00:07:20Oopsie daisies.
00:07:21Wait, wait.
00:07:22Hold on.
00:07:22That's the number before 75, isn't it?
00:07:25What's the matter?
00:07:26You look upset.
00:07:31See you, bye.
00:07:34Settle down.
00:07:36I'm a lizard.
00:07:38That's good.
00:07:39Don't dignify it.
00:07:40Doesn't matter.
00:07:42I'm doomed.
00:07:43I'm 74, 75th dead.
00:07:46What?
00:07:47That's not for class pets.
00:07:48When you're in captivity, 75 is the new 70.
00:07:51And hey, you want to live so bad, maybe a little exercise wouldn't kill you.
00:07:54Like what?
00:07:55Blinking's good.
00:07:56That'd be a start.
00:07:57I blink.
00:07:58Barely.
00:07:59Fine.
00:08:07Okay, I didn't mean you had to dive right in.
00:08:10Who am I kidding?
00:08:11I can't start this rigorous working out at this point in my life.
00:08:15It's too late.
00:08:17I blew it.
00:08:18I wasted my life.
00:08:20And now it's almost over.
00:08:23When a man has to face that he's about to die, he thinks of all the things he never done.
00:08:36I never ate a snail, never got to hunt a fly, just had them fed to me by everyone.
00:08:50Never ate algae straight from the sea, never got nothing but lettuce.
00:08:58Always lands in squirtle's pee.
00:09:02I never stole a bird's eggs, never chased a squirrel, never got to show my slick moves to a girl.
00:09:20I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:22I never had a boyfriend.
00:09:24I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:26I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:28I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:30I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:32I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:34I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:36I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:38I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:40I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:42I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:44I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:46I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:49I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:51I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:53I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:55I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:57I never had a girlfriend.
00:09:59I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:01I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:03I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:05I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:07I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:09I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:11I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:13I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:15I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:18I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:20I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:22I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:24I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:26I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:28I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:30I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:32I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:34I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:36I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:38I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:40I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:42I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:44I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:46I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:48I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:50I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:52I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:54I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:56I never had a girlfriend.
00:10:58I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:00I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:02I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:04I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:06I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:08I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:10I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:12I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:15I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:17I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:19I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:21I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:23I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:25I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:27I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:29I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:31I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:33I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:35I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:37I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:39I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:41I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:43I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:45I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:47I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:49I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:51I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:53I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:55I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:57I never had a girlfriend.
00:11:59I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:01I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:03I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:05I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:07I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:09I never had a girlfriend.
00:12:12The Nineties!
00:12:14It'll grow back.
00:12:16Oh!
00:12:18Eat this!
00:12:23Eesh!
00:12:25Hey, it looked cool in the nineties.
00:12:27I'm waiting. Volunteer, please.
00:12:29Don't you get it? This is my shot.
00:12:31So I go with one of these kids,
00:12:32chase the house for open windows.
00:12:34Then, when I'm alone, zip! I escape.
00:12:36Ha! You couldn't zip when you were 20.
00:12:38I'm zipping, and then I really live.
00:12:40Maybe climb a tree, swim in the sewer, see the Everglades.
00:12:44The Everglades? With those untamed animals? Are you nuts?
00:12:47You know they don't even have names, right? It's anarchy.
00:12:50You think a rock potato like you can survive there?
00:12:53You'll spend your last days hiding in a beer can!
00:12:55Let's go! Who's gonna take on some responsibility?
00:12:58Or do I have to be?
00:13:00Well, if no one else will, I don't want the pets to be on that one,
00:13:03because everybody wants to fit in and shouldn't be judged on their looks,
00:13:05their species, their size of their foreheads.
00:13:07Also, I'm supposed to go endorse the idea of them tomorrow,
00:13:09but I think my father may be home, so if it's okay if I go with your father...
00:13:12Pick one!
00:13:13Okay, the lizard!
00:13:23Listen, when you're out there in the wild and those animals come after you,
00:13:27remember to change your colors and blend in!
00:13:31That's chameleons. I'm not a chameleon.
00:13:33Oh, well, then you're a dead man.
00:13:36So tomorrow we have to do indoor skydiving.
00:13:38I mean, we want to do it, but we have to get ready,
00:13:40because it's gonna be exactly like skydiving, except you can't get hurt.
00:13:43Okay, we have a busy weekend.
00:13:45Do I have to wear a dress to Grandma's?
00:13:47Because it's really going to be pants weather on Sunday, and...
00:13:49Then Jada said the word puke, and I told her that's a curse word, and she said it wasn't.
00:13:52Is it a curse word? I feel bad leaving him here,
00:13:54but I know nobody wants him near the dinner table.
00:13:56Please go with his water. Back soon.
00:13:58Kayla, don't look scared at him! That's being mean!
00:14:06It's on.
00:14:24Oh, you bitch!
00:14:28Yeah!
00:14:36Yeah!
00:14:42He's nice, the new kookaburra, but so far he doesn't talk a lot.
00:14:45At least not with me. Maybe he's shy, since...
00:14:53I'm glad I burned my tongue. I didn't, like, burn off completely or anything.
00:14:56Or else I wouldn't be able to talk and tell you about how I ate my mozzarella sticks in the first place.
00:15:01Hey!
00:15:13Hey, Leonardo. You missed a great movie.
00:15:15Tomorrow I'll take you downstairs for breakfast.
00:15:17I just hope they still have some everything bagels left,
00:15:19because I don't even know why we get sesame bagels.
00:15:21Mom asked me to try one, and I was like,
00:15:23why would you take out the poppy seeds and the big salt stuff and the...
00:15:26Wait, where are you?
00:15:28This is a nightmare!
00:15:30Now I'm going to be the kid who killed the lizard no matter what I do with my life!
00:15:33Whether I do drama or want to be a doctor,
00:15:35well, I'm never going to be a doctor now.
00:15:37I could work at the DMV, hopefully the one next to Quizno's,
00:15:39because I don't want to go too far away from my parents.
00:15:42Mother of Godzilla!
00:15:44What was that?
00:15:46Well, who said that?
00:15:49The wall?
00:15:51Walls don't talk. Why would a wall say anything?
00:15:53Why do you keep pointing to it?
00:15:55I mean, they say that these walls could talk because they can't talk.
00:15:58The trophy!
00:16:00You said something! You just spoke!
00:16:02Mom!
00:16:03No!
00:16:04You talked! You're talking!
00:16:05I have to tell my mom or people will think I'm crazy!
00:16:07They'll probably have to go to school in Tampa for kids with tissues,
00:16:09but I have to! I...
00:16:11People can't know!
00:16:13Why are your hands wet?
00:16:15They're naturally moist.
00:16:17Please, I'm begging you to keep quiet.
00:16:19If people know I talk, they'll send me to a scientist or something.
00:16:23But I have to tell someone!
00:16:25Please.
00:16:27You're the only one who can hear me.
00:16:30Oh. Then why are you whispering?
00:16:33Because you were and it sounded fun.
00:16:38Do all lizards talk?
00:16:40I don't know. I never met them all.
00:16:42But we never talk to humans.
00:16:45Then why are you talking to me?
00:16:47Well, I...
00:16:49Because I want to.
00:16:51I think you're nice.
00:16:53Really? Thanks.
00:16:55You know, I don't even know what people think I'm nice.
00:16:57It's so hard to read people at school.
00:16:59Do people say you're nice to be nice?
00:17:00Uh-huh. I get it.
00:17:01Or they want to be cool and maybe think if they say you're nice,
00:17:02you'll think they're cool.
00:17:03I get it. I get it.
00:17:04You say, I get it, a lot.
00:17:06That's because I understand things.
00:17:08That's all. I get it.
00:17:10I've been around.
00:17:11Okay. I thought it might be something else.
00:17:13Like what?
00:17:14That you want me to stop talking.
00:17:16Oh. Wow.
00:17:18Really? Like, wow, that's crazy?
00:17:20More like, wow, I didn't think you were that self-aware.
00:17:24I can tell.
00:17:25I mean, people are too nice to say I talk too much,
00:17:27but sometimes I can tell from their faces that I'm talking too much.
00:17:29Like, old people make this face.
00:17:31And babies kind of look sleepy.
00:17:33And then the bus driver's face is like, stop,
00:17:35but I just can't stop and instead I...
00:17:39Sorry, I'm listening.
00:17:40Please, go ahead.
00:17:42I like always just come out and say whatever's on my mind.
00:17:45And like people look okay with it, but maybe they're resigned.
00:17:47But I can't help saying more.
00:17:48They make me smile like they're enjoying.
00:17:50You have no idea how stressful it is to not know when my talking gets annoying.
00:17:53I've seen a lot of kids who talk a lot.
00:17:55They seem to...
00:17:56So like I just continue talking and it feels like things are fine.
00:17:59And I relax until I see that look.
00:18:00I take it as a sign that they're mad that I'm still talking,
00:18:03or I'm loud, or I'm a whore.
00:18:04So I worry that I've lost them and I'm scared,
00:18:06so I start talking even more.
00:18:08This is normal.
00:18:09A bunch of kids...
00:18:10I feel like I lack the ability to tell
00:18:13when I'm not giving someone a chance to speak.
00:18:15And because of that I get scared and then believe that I'm in fact
00:18:18not giving anyone else a chance to speak.
00:18:21I said I get it!
00:18:24I know I said I get it again.
00:18:26I'm sorry.
00:18:27It's just that last one wasn't even the rhyme.
00:18:29It was a repeat.
00:18:35So like you're comfortable in sharing
00:18:38because your parents let you prattle.
00:18:40Well, they don't really like...
00:18:41But you shouldn't feel self-conscious
00:18:43like you're in a losing battle.
00:18:45Okay, but then how am I gonna...
00:18:46Maybe try to ask a question.
00:18:49Ask a question?
00:18:51It's exhausting like a blink.
00:18:54But the kids who are most popular
00:18:57are the kids who want to know
00:19:00what other kids think.
00:19:05Wow.
00:19:06I mean, it's not like I don't care about the other kids, it's just...
00:19:08I know.
00:19:09Look, it's great that you're good at talking about yourself.
00:19:12When people share stuff, they feel better.
00:19:14So if you can get other kids talking about themselves,
00:19:17they'll like being with you.
00:19:18And more than they do already, I mean.
00:19:22Five-second rule.
00:19:24Well, that was really nice.
00:19:27Oh, yeah.
00:19:28Glad to do it.
00:19:29Hey, remember, you can't tell anyone, ever,
00:19:33or we won't be able to talk again.
00:19:35Okay, so I'm like your special secret friend?
00:19:38That was a question.
00:19:39Ah, yeah, sure.
00:19:41And good question.
00:19:42Thanks, Leonardo.
00:19:43Call me Leo.
00:19:44Less Ninja Turtley.
00:19:46Summer, you need to get to bed, sweetie.
00:19:48Mom!
00:19:49What's the square root of 91?
00:19:51What?
00:19:53Please just get to bed.
00:19:55I don't mean just any question.
00:19:57Okay, right.
00:19:58Got it.
00:20:02Find your new seat.
00:20:10Oh, back already?
00:20:12You saw the whole world in one weekend.
00:20:14Wow.
00:20:15Hey, how were the Everglades?
00:20:16How high was the Eiffel Tower?
00:20:18What was the Pope like?
00:20:20Could you not do that on my pillow?
00:20:22You can put those computers away.
00:20:24We will not be studying our curriculum on toys.
00:20:39Whistle.
00:20:48Russian judge.
00:20:56No eating the books.
00:20:58Oh, Coach Kimura.
00:21:00Oh, I apologize.
00:21:02Let me clean that for you.
00:21:05There we go.
00:21:07This is so unfair.
00:21:09She's going to work us until we have no energy,
00:21:11and then we're only going to get into schools with drug problems.
00:21:14Forget about winning the class trip.
00:21:15This is a total nightmare.
00:21:16It's worse than when I lost my phone.
00:21:18This is like worse than when my dad wore bike shorts.
00:21:20It's worse than when I got lost in an airplane,
00:21:21which is hard to do, but it's really scary.
00:21:23I felt like I was in a horror movie,
00:21:24even though my parents won't let me watch horror movies,
00:21:26unless you've got the furnace in Toy Story 3, but that...
00:21:30Oh, what is this?
00:21:33What do you think we should do about it, Jada?
00:21:36I'm totally telling my parents about it.
00:21:38My dad obviously has a lot of pull
00:21:40because he gives the teachers free zit cream,
00:21:42but you should tell yours, too.
00:21:44Why are you talking to Summer?
00:21:46I like her now.
00:21:47I know. I do, too.
00:21:53What was that all about?
00:21:54What? She likes me.
00:21:56She thought I was fun.
00:21:58You? Fun? What'd you do?
00:21:59Turn your head more than once?
00:22:01Oh, what a showman.
00:22:02Get all your mean jokes in now,
00:22:04because the next kid who takes me home is the last kid.
00:22:07Sure they are, Mr. Chicken-to-leave.
00:22:09Whenever you say, Mr. Watch-to-get-bitten.
00:22:11Oh, I'm shaking.
00:22:12Mr. Almost-as-brave-as-Scooby-Doo.
00:22:15Ah!
00:22:19Duck, duck, duck, goo!
00:22:22Oh, my God!
00:22:23Oh, my God!
00:22:24That's not good!
00:22:26The Stamp Act. Eyes up here!
00:22:28For those of you who actually did the reading,
00:22:30Selina's never taught this stuff.
00:22:32Yeah, what's your stamp?
00:22:34...was the first tax levied directly on American colonists
00:22:37by the British Parliament.
00:22:39Skylar, what did I just say?
00:22:43Answer!
00:22:44How did the colonists react?
00:22:52Demerits!
00:22:54Whoa!
00:22:58You do not want demerits!
00:23:02What's a demerit?
00:23:03I think you play for the Clippers.
00:23:05You are going to leave fifth grade with discipline,
00:23:08or you are never going to leave fifth grade.
00:23:11Mm.
00:23:12Who has the discipline
00:23:14to take a class pet home this weekend?
00:23:17I'll do it. I'll take Leo again.
00:23:20Leo?
00:23:21Again?
00:23:22Who would want it twice?
00:23:32Not a one of you is man enough for middle school.
00:23:35Are you?
00:23:37I'll take the lizard!
00:23:44Oh, you're going to have so much fun with Leo, Eli.
00:23:47Do you think maybe I could visit?
00:23:48Really? That'd be great.
00:23:50Rain's coming, but we can all hang...
00:24:14You kids having a fun play date?
00:24:17Uh, sure.
00:24:21Hmm.
00:24:41Sorry about those chips, Amy.
00:24:43Can't be too careful.
00:24:44Have a kale cupcake.
00:24:46Do I have to wear the safety suit all weekend?
00:24:48Lizards carry disease, honey.
00:24:50Kids and dogs are especially vulnerable.
00:25:06Um, I think my mom wants to pick me up.
00:25:11Thank you, Julie!
00:25:13They had the best time.
00:25:18Could you please go cut his chicken into non-chokeable pieces?
00:25:49I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:51I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:52I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:53I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:54I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:55I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:56I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:57I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:58I didn't mean to kill you.
00:25:59I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:00I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:01I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:02I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:03I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:04I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:05I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:06I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:07I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:08I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:09I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:10I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:11I didn't mean to kill you.
00:26:13Oh, boy.
00:26:23Ha ha.
00:26:32What? It'll grow back.
00:26:33You're dressed like a 1950s astronaut and I'm the weird one.
00:26:37Oh, now you're threatening me, Doodlepoo.
00:26:40Do that again.
00:26:43What
00:26:47What dinner time Eli
00:26:51Eli now you need three hours to digest your food before bad
00:26:57This is totally crazy you talk just to you cuz yeah, I'm special
00:27:04Yeah, that's right. Oh
00:27:07Okay, but you can't tell anyone they'll try to kill me like ET
00:27:11But my parents told me when someone says don't tell anyone. That's what I have to tell
00:27:16Well, your parents are right, but that's with strange humans. I'm just a strange Lizzie. Okay, please don't tell
00:27:23Especially him the drone. No way. You saw what it did to the Cheetos out there
00:27:29I mean, it's nice that it's loyal. Come on when I was six kids thought it was cool
00:27:34Maybe you should say something about it. I don't want to hurt its feelings. I
00:27:39Know a way I've seen kids break up over the years
00:27:43You write down why you're dumping them and it gives the other person time to soak it in and not snap
00:27:49It's a dear drone. Let it get a pen and paper
00:27:54Dear drone
00:28:05When you hover over me all day
00:28:09I
00:28:10Feel safe, but also feel my social life melting away. I'm not saying
00:28:18Crime I just like to
00:28:24And I think that you could make new friends
00:28:31In graphic
00:28:36Massager or the yellow
00:28:38I'm not saying I don't like you. Mr.
00:28:42I
00:28:43Just want to have the smallest hope just visible in a microscope of somehow
00:28:52Not dying
00:28:58It's not you it's me
00:29:08I
00:29:10I
00:29:35He's just doing it for show see he knows he's recyclable
00:29:41Let's just give up some space
00:29:44Nobody's ever gonna like me like he does kid. They don't even know you now. You can finally show you stuff
00:29:50Uh, I don't have any stuff. Ah, you just gotta find your gimmick. It was a boy in
00:29:571998 Mike Jakovic he memorized all the words to walk it on the Sun
00:30:04Smash mouth. No, look it's got a lot of words
00:30:07The point is plenty kids have a gimmick. It's okay. I got a few get me a caterpillar for real
00:30:15Trust me
00:30:28Oh, that's perfect, okay, here we go
00:30:37I
00:30:41Show you something Eli, where's your safety suits try doing this?
00:31:07I
00:31:13Don't know but you hit it straight in the jellybeans man walk way to go home
00:31:37Yes
00:31:44I'm back. What's your tail you escaping one limited time. Yes. Give me some space. I got hit in the jellybeans. I
00:31:53Forgot that was there
00:31:56Salinas was teacher of the year that substitute lady is unacceptable to the skin cream samples
00:32:01I give out mean nothing to you people. What do I have to do to get that horrible woman replaced?
00:32:06Dr. Hanger, please. She's sitting right here. So Jay, it's not polite fine
00:32:12May I speak about you as if you're not here?
00:32:20My kid was on track to get into Westlake next year then Langley prep in three years then Dartmouth in seven years then a moderately
00:32:26Happy marriage in 14 years. I paid for that smart board and this light switch
00:32:31If I'm letting you keep this animal as her teacher you're gonna do something for me to fix this
00:32:39Four seconds three two
00:32:42one pencil down
00:32:44Except Jada who will now be getting two more minutes due to her permanent jet lag
00:32:53Now one of you has to take home a class pet volunteer or be assigned I'll take Leo again
00:33:00What is the deal Leo again? Wait, I thought you said you can't take a pet twice, right?
00:33:04Because I totally would I mean, why do you want him again? Um, cuz he was
00:33:09Awesome. Why do you want him? Uh, same reason awesome. Wait, if it's awesome, I want it
00:33:15It's supposed to say dr. Skin not dr. Skid
00:33:19So unoriginal, is it that great what I got for you Drake's coming to my party
00:33:24Yeah, I'm still on it. I meant the pop quiz the two more minutes who takes care of you
00:33:30What did daddy do? Well, Benji Jada's substitute teacher is a horror show making the kids read big books
00:33:39So daddy got Jada something no one else could ever do
00:33:44Making the kids read big books. So daddy got Jada something no other kid gets
00:33:52Extra time
00:33:54The other kids are sweating all the answers they're forgetting all except for mine cuz my kids got extra time
00:34:02Mom, she's the lizard in my room. The birthday party's coming up and out right now, honey. Daddy's bragging
00:34:08Ah
00:34:10This is like the worst day of my life
00:34:12Nobody's focusing on my party and it's going to totally suck and all the other kids will be happy about it
00:34:17What why would they be happy because they're all jealous. Wait, what who said that that was me?
00:34:23Oh my god
00:34:33When you roll with dr. Skinner, you're a true VIP cuz rules do not apply to me give me that
00:34:40So you only talk to me because I'm special
00:34:44Sure, that makes sense. But can you at least do tricks at the party?
00:34:47Can you rap and like play the piano with your tongue or something? Nah, this is just between us
00:34:52I'm talking to you to give advice. I don't need advice. I'm awesome. Nah, you're miserable
00:34:58Wait, what just like Emma Lawrence, you know three Nina Myers in 55 all pretty all rich all bright
00:35:06So not done or snotty or secretly hated people were jealous
00:35:12Not of the snotty news. Look people don't realize the pressure someone like me is under my family is so amazing
00:35:19So I have a lot more to live up to I have to get into the best middle school and have the best party
00:35:24And yeah, only the best people around me. No, you don't you don't get what being awesome's like, but you're not I'm what?
00:35:31Brace yourself
00:35:33Not that great. I
00:35:36Know you guys are proud, but your house is kind of loud and your dad's a middleweight
00:35:40Your family's not that great a middleweight. He's the face and all these flyers
00:35:45You live in Fort Myers our countertops record he gets paid to burn a boy
00:35:50So looks like Britney Spears. You had six or seven beers. I don't mean to denigrate
00:35:55We're not that
00:35:58Great, you're great, but no one's that great. We're all just people and lizards
00:36:05If you can take a step back see yourself for what you are
00:36:11You'll find that you're an even brighter star
00:36:16so
00:36:17Then I'm not that great. There you go, but I can feel that way
00:36:26Coming off like heavy gear
00:36:28after 11 stressful years
00:36:31To my fellow
00:36:34Peers I can finally relate
00:36:37It's not
00:36:39To be
00:36:49Thank you great job guys, thanks
00:36:53Honey, maybe you want to tip them what the watches guys you want some water anybody Matt? That's okay
00:37:00Okay. Well, thank you. Yep. Thanks. Mr. Skin. It's dr. Dr. Skin
00:37:06Mom dad, do we have any more invitations more? I thought we excluded everyone you wanted. Yeah, but we made a bigger list
00:37:26Hi guys, I'm so glad you came thanks for inviting us. Of course. How are you?
00:37:32Wait, I know this one fine
00:37:36That thing sounded like
00:37:42Like in second grade when he told mrs. Lemos that Superman came from the planet crouton
00:37:50Hey you kids try the bubble guy yet dad, we'll get to the bubble this guy's next level he makes bubble animals
00:37:58There you go Matt you're not holding it right Jada burgers Jada taters
00:38:06Jada vegetables
00:38:08Please don't do this
00:38:25What are you looking at boss you got a problem with compact legs what you think you've got it so great out there
00:38:32What are you doing the box?
00:38:34Molt
00:38:36Occasional blinking. All right. I'm sorry brother. We're fighting the same fight
00:38:40I mean the only fun I've ever had is biting some of that guy's fingers off
00:38:44I've asked you five times to jump through this hoop
00:38:47I just I'm getting old, you know, you ever feel like times running out and this is all we're ever gonna know
00:38:53I
00:39:03Gotta tell you the truth is no animal wants to be locked inside. I can't believe how much cool I
00:39:12Mean, hey just Jada. Are you having a good time?
00:39:16Thanks for asking me. My parents never asked
00:39:19They just assume I'm having a good time because they still don't realize they aren't that great
00:39:24So what will make you have a better time? Good question
00:39:28Okay
00:39:46Standard magnetic lock circuits are cross-current jumper cables balloon right here
00:39:57Yeah
00:40:27Oh
00:40:40I'm sorry. It's cool. That's about the eye contact
00:40:57My wallet
00:41:07You made it happen
00:41:27Oh
00:41:33You guys are really into that lizard, he's just awesome
00:41:44I had so much fun at the party yesterday. I couldn't sleep you. Did you get a bubble animal went on the water slide?
00:41:48I
00:41:53Again what have I happen to zipping? Oh, you'll know what I said. I'll be in the Everglades dining on maggots
00:42:00You can only dream about
00:42:09Santa Claus has 39 elves making
00:42:121,981 toys. Hey, hey freezing here. How about giving a guy some shell wait. Oh, oh, mr. Popular now
00:42:19You want to come in here with me? It's 65 degrees. These central Florida winters are brutal. Just a couple of minutes
00:42:26Hey, hey, at least buy me dinner first. Wait, are those my baseball cards?
00:42:41You
00:42:54You're talking to them that's why you keep coming back what no just a little bit no, no, no
00:43:00No, there is no little bit. We don't talk to them. These kids are all benefiting from my insights before I drop dead
00:43:06Okay, so it's about your ego. That's not what this is
00:43:10Hey, it's about sharing my 74 years of wisdom to help these kids with their issues whether it's breaking up with the drone or
00:43:18Having hand-me-down pants Oh Bo freaking who hide away my sister's shell till I was 16
00:43:24I made a huge difference with that DJ kid
00:43:28Well, I don't understand. That's normal first one. Usually it's in the front, but very nice. You're growing up
00:43:41I
00:43:44Told him that
00:43:461974 all of a sudden grew a nose the size of a Buick just like his dad's and
00:43:51Everybody still loved him because he was a cool kid like you and the next week Cole's problem was even tougher
00:43:58You won't do sleepovers cuz you think you say things in your sleep
00:44:02Well, if I'm not gonna tell anyone about you talking to me, you promised not to tell anyone. Yeah, of course
00:44:09This isn't my real voice, I really talk like this, but I can't let them know I sound ridiculous
00:44:18Well, I fixed it I told them you sound like a young BG what about the weekend, you know him
00:44:30Last week he sang at the winter recital. I heard they went nuts
00:44:34I
00:44:38Sorry was that praise keep it up and we may see more of you here your whole class did great
00:44:46Did they win? Nah, the kindergarten always wins way too
00:44:53And you should have seen me last week with Mia you mean huggy the human cling-wrap, excuse me
00:44:59She has a name as you know, her parents were recently divorced
00:45:05Today very considerate. Are you letting him cut his own hair now?
00:45:12You can't watch the kids next weekend so me and Aurora can have Valentine's Day together I'm asking you one favor
00:45:22I'm sorry, but lizards do not talk parrots macaws songbirds and certain killer whales
00:45:28Don't believe everything you read on the Internet
00:45:32Why would you only talk to me guys, you're nice you're great at school answering all the questions
00:45:39I love to learn things
00:45:41You're a lot quieter around your family
00:45:43Don't you ever want to let him see how big that brain of yours is my brother and sister think I'm weird
00:45:50really
00:45:53You just looked like my grandpa, yeah, is that a good thing?
00:45:57Uh-huh. My grandpa used to talk to me
00:46:00He really liked science and he would ask me questions
00:46:04Even if he knew the answer
00:46:07What he sounds like a great guy. He was my best friend. Oh
00:46:13No, no, I didn't mean to get that going. Please kid. I hate that. I'm sorry. Oh, no
00:46:19No, don't be sorry. Just stop. I can't handle it
00:46:23My mom says it's good to cry not where I come from here, let me calm you down
00:46:28I'll sing you a lullaby and you'll go to sleep
00:46:32Don't cry
00:46:35Hines for weekly
00:46:38Don't cry
00:46:41It's lazy and dumb
00:46:44Dry those tears
00:46:47They make you look ugly
00:46:50Sock it up
00:46:53My shin shall come
00:46:57Everyone's stuck with something this dark with
00:47:03Everyone's trapped in something they hate
00:47:08What does it stop?
00:47:17Why not be strong
00:47:20Make the best of your fate
00:47:25Don't cry
00:47:28It's really annoying
00:47:32Turn off the forces it looks bad on you. I
00:47:39Know it's hard. I
00:47:42Know your trouble
00:47:44But we've all got problems
00:47:47So
00:48:09You're just doing what my grandpa did pretending not to know something so I can tell you it's right here
00:48:16Scientific research has established that crying releases
00:48:19Oxytocin and endorphins these feel-good chemicals help ease both physical and emotional pain
00:48:25I didn't know how to help her. So I just listened and that helped Wow
00:48:29So you got this ET scam going got every kid thinking he's Elliot. This is gonna end badly
00:48:34All I know is that these kids will remember me. Did you hear about hammy threes funeral last week?
00:48:40Hammy three died didn't know that exactly. They say the funeral was a snooze. No one had anything to say
00:48:46I like that white spot
00:48:48Over his ear. I like the way he breathed
00:48:51He gave me pink eye my funeral is gonna be packed with fond remembrances and anecdotes
00:48:59Yeah, good for you and your last week's vocabulary words and buddy that funeral could come sooner than you think
00:49:06Have fun Anthony Leo's awesome. These things heads grow back to or just their tails. Never mind. I'll figure it out
00:49:13Oh, no, call my next of kin. This is how I want to divide my estate
00:49:20Wow, I got your back bud I couldn't let you do this one alone. What are you gonna do you lay back?
00:49:26It's harder to hurt me. I got this shell. Oh, yeah, I got it. I got it
00:49:30I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it
00:49:33I got this shell. What's about giving advice? Oh, like I don't know anything. I could do what you do
00:49:51Hey
00:49:55Come on get that I talk. Oh my god
00:49:59No, no, no, stop. Stop. Can't do that or we'll all die. What?
00:50:03I don't know. I'm telling you you'll die. Just shut up. Calm down. Oh, okay. Fix your phone later
00:50:09I'm a talking turtle. I picked you cuz I
00:50:12Like your style take it down a notch. I got this now. Tell me your problems. What I can fix your problems
00:50:20I I've seen a lot of things in that fifth grade room and I can help so come on
00:50:24I don't have any problems other than I broke my phone. Haha bully. I get it. Come on
00:50:30You're insecure, right? Every class bully is no, I
00:50:34Don't know
00:50:35You're sad. You got something tearing you up inside. Just say it. Come on my freaking talking turtle. I can't tell anyone else
00:50:43Of course, I'm a bully. I don't know what else to do. I'm just different. I'm not smart
00:50:49Nah, everyone's smart in some way. You're just afraid of trying and looking not smart. It's textbook
00:50:55What's the textbook? You know what? Never mind
00:50:59I'm different in other ways, too. There you go. Come on out with it
00:51:03You won't say anything. Oh, come on. What is it? What's the sadness? I
00:51:09Don't know
00:51:11How babies are made?
00:51:13Perfect. That's very class bully tough on the outside a self-hating pile of cottage cheese on the inside
00:51:19Can you just tell me Oh about babies? Sure. Here we go
00:51:24First the daddy climbs on the mommy's back while she's swimming in the water
00:51:28The daddy reaches under the mommy to find her cloaca. This goes on for about 24 hours
00:51:34Then the mommy comes ashore to make a nest and deposits her eggs in the sand
00:51:38My mom made eggs in the sand. Yes, so the fish don't eat him. I
00:51:47Crushed it
00:51:49Totally fixed the kids problem the taping me up. I think maybe it's cuz he wants to keep me
00:52:08You miss your friends from being held back
00:52:12Worried about being behind. This is a tough time. But these are the best years believe me
00:52:19Enjoyed not knowing everything
00:52:21Enjoyed being a kid
00:52:24You're a good one. Do you miss being a kid?
00:52:28I'm just glad I'm still here
00:52:33Okay, every one of you has had a weekend with Leo here so from here on you'll be taking home
00:52:39What's the turtles name again?
00:52:43Squirtle my name is squirtle. I think it's squirtle squirtle sucks
00:52:48I beg your pardon. Why I don't know. He just sucks. I
00:52:53Like Leo though. He's nice
00:53:02What is so special about this reptile I
00:53:09Like his skin his skin is like my grandma's elbows, uh, same same same
00:53:18If you also desperately want to take home that lizard again, you'll just have to earn it
00:53:30You will all make my class a model of excellence and even win that
00:53:36Academic Cathola or it's the turtle for all of you
00:53:42Was this your dying wish to turn a bunch of brats against me it's not about us
00:53:47It's about the kids. They're motivated. They're gonna finish the year strong
00:54:17Oh
00:54:38Yeah, Louis pasteur is the father of microbiology he discovered that dangerous microorganisms could grow in open water
00:54:47You know
00:55:00Wow, well now that's impressive
00:55:09Class 5c you're one step away from going to Magic Land Park
00:55:14How great a job is our substitute teacher done bravo, Miss Malkin I
00:55:19Know a lot of the parents weren't happy when I first brought you in due to your rap as a miserable person
00:55:24But if you win the history fair on Saturday, we'll you'll prove all the doubters wrong
00:55:30Well principal spawn in the classroom. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways
00:55:37Back to your posts. No five hiding. Oh
00:55:41That pick is fire. Thank you. Hey, what is the deal?
00:55:45I didn't wait for your next Jenga move for 30 minutes
00:55:48Now did you make the costume or did your mom tell the truth? You know, I won't tell anyone I only talk to you
00:55:57I don't know. I must be on Malkin's desk or something
00:56:12Hello, hey pal toss it over here. I'll handle it. Can you hear me?
00:56:19Yeah, I think Malkin must have an extra phone
00:56:22Anyhoo, what did summer say? Oh my god
00:56:25You can't all play Jackie Kennedy and like we sell what a slave this history fair
00:56:31I know that Magic Land Park trip would be awesome. Hey, you're awesome because you tried your best
00:56:37I
00:56:48Only because she that's summer's phone in there right behind yours
00:56:57You happy now for rooting this I don't know what happened I must have but doubt you I mean but shot you
00:57:03You don't even have a butt. Oh, how dare you?
00:57:08You talk to all of us you said I was the only one you said I was the only one I thought I was special
00:57:14You're all special. I just
00:57:20See you guys getting along and doing great in class
00:57:24It felt like I was actually making a difference you did this year would have been a nightmare without you helping me
00:57:31Miss Malkin so mean talking to you made the class bearable
00:57:37I
00:57:39People would find out you told me not to tell anyone and I didn't nobody did because we can keep a secret
00:57:46Yeah, what did you tell everyone I shaved my unibrow?
00:57:50Because I don't hey
00:57:52The only one he told about your unibrow or that you still eat your boogers was me and I barely chuckled what?
00:57:59I'm leaving I
00:58:01Tried wait, it's Friday. Aren't you gonna take me home?
00:58:06Summer it's your turn. Please. I'm so sorry. How can we trust you now? That was a question
00:58:16All right, what's everyone doing here? Oh you're leaving good take the whole day off
00:58:21You need to rest up for the history fair tomorrow. Go home. Go shoot. Come on out you go
00:58:27I
00:58:39Don't understand I know I lied to the kids. What did I do to you?
00:58:44Excuse me talking to my students behind my back
00:58:48Advising them. Okay, I feel terrible, but I was just trying to undermine my methods
00:58:53Cheat me out of feeling any satisfaction from their success what they learned everything you wanted
00:58:59Why wouldn't that make you happy? Don't think you can analyze me
00:59:03I'm an adult not a shrieking brat who thinks reading Canterbury Tales is torture. It's not torture
00:59:10Asking me to be happy when I have nothing but these four walls
00:59:15What about your family? Excuse me. Do you see any family? Oh
00:59:20Not unless you're related to the gym coach
00:59:23Those pictures are none of your business. Gotcha. Never saw I put my whole life into teaching just to be a mere
00:59:32substitute
00:59:33Never had my own class never got any respect
00:59:38happy
00:59:40You want me to be happy?
00:59:43Look I also had dreams that never happened like seeing the Everglades or spreading salmonella
00:59:50But this year I fell into something even better. I really clicked with these kids
00:59:56Oh, maybe it helped just a little that you're a talking animal
01:00:01Yeah, but also maybe it's you because I've seen some subs come through the school that kids love. What about mrs. Knight?
01:00:10Nice to the kids didn't smell quite right
01:00:14Remember, mr. Monk
01:00:16He was a closet drunk
01:00:19This may have been before your time. Miss Lowe's a
01:00:25fine teacher
01:00:27She was
01:00:31Wait, you were a student here. You don't remember me. I was a lot different. I was
01:00:39Happy oh
01:00:41Wow, yeah, you were very sweet. I was adorable and she she made you
01:00:53Yes, she did she made me feel like I could do anything and tell me do you think she was
01:01:00Happy
01:01:02She made you her family that's what great teachers do even
01:01:07Substitutes with the little time they have they try to make a difference and that's what keeps them happy
01:01:14You can't feel love. It's not the end
01:01:17That smile you had can't come back again. Just pull that stick out your tush and take a cue
01:01:26from teachers that
01:01:28Preceded you you're not alone
01:01:31Make a home for them and embrace your important role in shaping them
01:01:38body and soul
01:01:41Oh
01:01:54Well, that felt
01:01:57Wonderful. I know you got it. You're gonna get those kids first place tomorrow. Oh, you're coming with me
01:02:03No, please. They're mad. Let's let them focus on winning. Well, I'm still taking you after they win
01:02:09We'll make sure they appreciate all you were doing for them
01:02:13You know what? You are special
01:02:21Sleep last night. I couldn't stop thinking about what Leo did to us. Let's just not talk about Leo. We're done with Leo
01:02:29We're ready. We can win this thing ourselves. Good morning, my dear
01:02:34students
01:02:37I look confident. You sounded nice real warm. Thank you. I'll keep you posted when I can
01:02:55But I didn't just say whatever I thought the flag should look like I listened to others to see what they thought the result was
01:03:01The superior design we had today and also people liking me more
01:03:06I'm Susan B. Anthony. I played a pivotal role in the woman's suffrage movement in the 19th century
01:03:12But I'm not that special or great and neither is my family so I can relate to average women who couldn't vote until 1920
01:03:19I'm Winston Churchill. We shall fight on the beaches. We shall fight them in the fields and in the streets
01:03:25We shall never surrender, but we shall let them down easy with a nice letter so they don't lose their minds
01:03:31This is wonderful
01:03:34I can't hear anything. Can you open your pocket?
01:03:37They burned me joint of arc at the state, but I am NOT afraid
01:03:42Freaking who everyone's got problems. I talked about it to a friend and felt a lot better. Oh
01:03:51I think that friend is you
01:03:56Melkins marvels
01:04:04To the first substitute to ever win teacher of the year
01:04:10You'll be chaperoned by ms. Malkin and coach Kimura
01:04:16Is it over we win when do I come out what's happening
01:04:22Miss Malkin, can we go see Leo, honey? It's about to rain
01:04:26We can't just go to our classroom for one second. You know what the rain does to my extensions
01:04:30I gotta say I thought you were some kind of a twisted animal a rabid bitter bag of mothballs
01:04:37Foaming at the mouth, but I've never seen my Jada speak like that. It's like she's
01:04:42Nice, that's our ms. Malkin. You really got to know our kids
01:04:48You got to get this woman a full-time job. Thank you. Oh, I think we're gonna range that
01:04:54And Cole's part of his voice thanks to you, how'd you do it? Well, you know
01:05:01That's my stomach I better go
01:05:06She's not gonna make it
01:05:08What happened? I couldn't hear nothing. Did we win? I thought I was gonna see the kids
01:05:13We're going somewhere very special. We're all going to celebrate what the pizza party
01:05:21Wow, this pizza is out in the boonies
01:05:30What's going on you're leaving me here
01:05:33What about the kids they lost the class embarrassed themselves and they blamed you what?
01:05:39What was all that cheering that was for the other class? I'm sorry
01:05:46Don't say that you said the Everglades was your dream now
01:05:50You can live it out with no chance of ever running into the children or their parents or the principal or the media. I
01:05:57Said it was my dream
01:06:00I
01:06:30Oh
01:06:36What a shame he must have run away
01:06:48He left us oh
01:06:50Look, there seems to be some kind of note
01:06:54Leo could write of course he could talk. Oh, he talked to you people, too
01:07:00I thought I was special
01:07:05Dear class, I've greatly enjoyed my time with you this year
01:07:09But I wish to move on and finally see the world
01:07:12I realized I broke your trust and that can't be fixed
01:07:17But if you would be so kind
01:07:19please keep our conversation secret so that I'm not harassed like ET or the iron giant or
01:07:26Splash or the classic the shape of water simply attribute your success to ms.
01:07:33Malkin whose integrity is beyond reproach
01:07:38best regards Leo
01:07:41well
01:07:42Let's try and be happy for Leo. He's doing what he wanted most but we never even got to thank him
01:07:48That's life gang life gets more difficult the older we get
01:07:54It's called growing up
01:08:01When I was 10 I
01:08:05Didn't have a single care and not a single body hair and life was fine
01:08:15When I was nine
01:08:18We still love milk for Santa Claus my mom was not in menopause and life was great
01:08:29When I was eight I
01:08:32Still could wear a size one shoe. I thought Big Macs were good for you
01:08:39Yes life was heaven
01:08:43When I was seven
01:08:47I knew some dirty words, but thought
01:08:51That babies came out of mom's butt
01:08:55like baby chicks
01:08:58When I was six
01:09:01My folks would fight, but I was chill my grandpa and my gerbils were still alive
01:09:10When I was five I didn't care that people died
01:09:18A haircut used to make me cry way more
01:09:26When I was four I
01:09:30Didn't need to have a phone
01:09:32They hadn't yet invented drones to follow me
01:09:40When I was three
01:09:43I'd laugh for days when I was two
01:09:46When someone said the word doo-doo
01:09:51There were no rules when I was one
01:09:56Except don't fall. We just had fun, but that was then
01:10:04Okay, everybody be careful on the dragon coaster
01:10:09What the teacher says you call us every half hour and don't lick anything
01:10:14Yeah, they tried to put the shift on Kabir when he was up, but guess what he could hit to right field, too
01:10:19Oh, that's something
01:10:22What do you think Leo's doing right now?
01:10:25I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know
01:10:28I don't know. I don't know. I don't know
01:10:31What do you think Leo's doing right now, I have no idea
01:10:47Sure kids why flip over the musty old turtle before you leave even though he knows the truth
01:10:53But now everyone's gone. Everyone but me in that pathetic
01:10:58Where's the allergy kids fun
01:11:01Oh
01:11:05Here we go, hey drone, it's the turtle can you come over here? I was just thinking about you
01:11:16Not like that, but yeah, sure whatever get over here
01:11:30Me okay, we gotta move
01:11:40Hey rare shake it off man, you're freaking everyone out
01:11:54Okay
01:12:00Oh
01:12:31This is our last field trip together, how does it feel like our worst what?
01:12:46Now watch me whip now watch me nae-nae okay now watch me whip what is going on back here
01:12:53She did it. Excuse me. I saw it. I saw the whole thing
01:12:57She took him out of the terrarium right after you guys left that day
01:13:00She took him and I wanted to say something, but I heard her vacuum
01:13:06Somebody else's pay I flipped on my back and this whole thing is my fault cuz I got jealous of my best friend instead of
01:13:12Just being happy for him. I use the camera phone to bust him. But now I gotta bust you demerit face
01:13:17He's lying. This turtle can't be trusted. He turned on Leah. Come on
01:13:21You all know Leo's the reason you got this stupid trip. He helped you with all your weird kid problems
01:13:27That's why you won. He just wanted to do something meaningful with the rest of his pathetic time and he did it
01:13:33Why did you say the rest of his time cuz he's dying?
01:13:36He's gonna be 75 and that's lights out for lizards
01:13:41But does the merit face care now all the merit face wants is all the credit
01:13:46Oh another lie, then. Where is he? Miss misery? Where's my best friend to merit face? Where is he?
01:13:58I
01:14:15Took him and I drove him away
01:14:20He's right I wanted the credit I thought it would make me
01:14:27happy
01:14:29He's gonna die thinking we're mad at him. Where did you take him?
01:14:34The Everglades you sent him to the glades. That's a terrible neighborhood those crazy animals are rip them apart
01:14:40Miss Malcolm, please help us find him. We can't not see him again
01:14:51Hey there, we need to change course we're going to the Everglades
01:14:55But we're going to Magic Land Park, that's what the parents expect and that's where we're going. Oh my our first fight
01:15:14Thank you, I thought children we're going to Magic Land Park
01:15:25Oh
01:15:31Thanks, but a little too murky for me how close are we to a drip tube
01:15:37Seriously, the microorganisms will kill you a kid told me that you guys never heard of Louis Pasteur
01:15:55I
01:16:00Won't help me out here boss. Is that you?
01:16:05Right, hey, that's the guy the guy who set us free at that party, that's the guy
01:16:17Listen I don't know what grandma's thinking. We'll save him on our own. Let's go
01:16:26Get this guy some algae and some of you
01:16:33You're gonna love it here no trainers telling you what to do no bratty kids joking about your compact legs
01:16:40But I miss those kids
01:16:42What's not ready? You just gotta get to know them like this one kid whose father's back at a gorilla situation
01:16:55I got this go back to the kids
01:17:00Hey anybody see a buddy of mine, he's green with bombs got a tail wicked ugly
01:17:07Okay moving on
01:17:15And I'm hungry
01:17:25Oh
01:17:28And I need one fire blower hat
01:17:33Ready am I right kids
01:17:55Oh
01:18:25I got this. I am from the Bronx. I've been driving since I was eight
01:18:55I
01:18:57Knew it we go
01:19:06And I explained to them
01:19:08I was just afraid someone would tell but now they're all mad at me and my
01:19:13Funerals gonna be even worse than hammy three. Who's a me three. I think it's a sandwich at Arby's
01:19:19Why are you talking about your funeral cause it's coming any day. I'm almost
01:19:2475 years old. Oh what we live to like a hundred and ten. Wow, but Skyler's dad
01:19:31110 unless eaten by alligators. I'm 97
01:19:35106 he's 74. He's a tween. Look how fast he blinks
01:19:40I
01:19:51Gotta get back to those kids. I can redeem myself
01:20:10Oh
01:20:13Guys before you do anything, let's talk about why you're angry. Okay, anyone's parents getting divorce
01:20:40I
01:20:47Don't know but it could kill us, right
01:21:10You
01:21:17Need to chill
01:21:31Summer talk to him. Oh, it's like I don't know if you know the story, but it doesn't really matter
01:21:34We were supposed to go to Magicland Park, which everyone says is really cool. I mean, I've never been there
01:21:38I don't like magic and I really don't like roller coasters. They just seem really boring
01:21:41I know they're supposed to be scary, which isn't boring, but it's like you're not doing anything
01:21:44You're just sitting and going up and down when you could be playing soccer or categories or making a cake
01:21:48I mean my mom's on a diet so
01:21:50I
01:22:05Couldn't Leo ever survive out here. How do we even start looking for him? I just don't know
01:22:21Oh
01:22:31Yeah, we just wanted to thank you so sorry I got mad
01:22:36We all are we won the trip Leo all because of you
01:22:41You made me feel like I could do anything. You brought us all together again
01:22:45I've never had a lizard that taught me so much
01:22:48Or any non lizards either
01:22:51I'm not scared. I'm gonna hug you one more time
01:22:56What
01:23:12Sorry, I scared you when I get nervous I tend to mold old habit
01:23:18awesome
01:23:19That was the best funeral I could ever have wait
01:23:24But if you guys won, shouldn't you be celebrating in Magic Land Park? We couldn't celebrate
01:23:30We needed to see you before you die. Oh
01:23:35Who told you I was dying the turd?
01:23:38Scooter told us well, I thought I was but I found out I'm not
01:23:48You
01:23:55Write about the endorphins it really feels awesome
01:24:09Hey glad you're okay, sorry about busting you look I want you to have something
01:24:19I'm least I can do. It's okay. Put it back on you're gonna get arrested
01:24:29You should all be proud
01:24:31We've all learned so much this year now before I go I want to finish something else that mrs. Salinas started
01:24:40I'm going to read the rest of Charlotte's web
01:24:44Is she kidding? Let's just get through it
01:24:48Charlotte was dying, but I feel peaceful
01:24:51She said your success in the ring was to a small degree my success
01:24:57Why did you do all this for me Wilbur asked?
01:25:00Because I liked you replied Charlotte after all what's life? Anyway, we're born
01:25:07We live a little while we die
01:25:09Perhaps I was trying to live
01:25:18Okay
01:25:21Still wish I could eat those spider babies. Nobody's a nutty spider baby
01:25:34Only one baby, I guess you didn't bury the other eggs deep enough in the sand
01:25:38I
01:25:46Like so over being a kid gonna look in the mirror for stubble
01:25:54Gonna drink orange juice with the bubbles
01:25:58I'll say I don't need you. I'll be keeping it steady
01:26:06I
01:26:07Miss you already
01:26:12How are we gonna get through middle school without you you'll be fine
01:26:16It wasn't me you did you trusted someone to hear your problems? That's all we need
01:26:23Remember everyone's scared. So don't keep it to yourself
01:26:27Find your Leo to talk to it could be your teacher your mom your friend your turtle
01:26:34They're ready to listen, I promise they'll make you feel better
01:26:48Miss Malkin
01:26:50Needless to say you've made your mark here. And as I promised I'm opening up a class for you to run full-time next year
01:26:57Well, thank you principal spawn, but I'll need one condition Matt whatever class I teach
01:27:04I want these two alongside me as pets. Well, okay
01:27:10I don't see that being a problem Wow, look at this. We're going with Malkin change of scenery should be good
01:27:16Congratulations meet your new
01:27:26This is good
01:27:56Oh
01:28:26Oh