After the birth of his grandson, Bobby Roth undertakes a cinematic investigation as to what constitutes being a "good ma | dG1fWDNEX21ZdVo0REE
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Short filmTranscript
00:0039 years ago, I became the proud father of a baby boy, and last year that boy had a son
00:07of his own.
00:08I wondered, what was it like to raise a son today?
00:12I decided to ask a number of men and women who I respect, what is a good man?
00:17That is a question that I've never directly entertained.
00:22My mom may be smart and conscientious.
00:25She was the only white lady in the Chicago Urban League.
00:27She was always campaigning for anti-war candidates, and then supporting me with unconditional
00:34love.
00:35My dad was trauma.
00:36When he came home from work in the afternoon, it was like someone rolled a hand grenade
00:40into the house, and everyone was watching to see, was the pin pulled?
00:45My dad was in many ways my hero, and he died about six months ago.
00:50I think for a lot of men, that's a very complex moment.
00:55Every time they would talk about each other, they would talk about them with hatred, which
00:58is exactly the impetus that helped me think, if I'm angry at 88 years old, I blew it.
01:04I made a deal I would be a totally different parent.
01:11The concept of what a good man is has to constantly be reappraised and reevaluated, especially
01:17if you want to stay connected to people in a different generation.
01:20I mean, I identify as a gay man.
01:22I definitely grew up in a very heteronormative family and culture.
01:27So if there's a nurture influence, then why didn't I become straight?
01:33I've managed to be so much more vulnerable with my daughter.
01:35I wasn't aware that I was modeling a tougher side for my son.
01:40I couldn't help myself.
01:41So my father committed suicide when I was seven years old.
01:45I never had a father figure, and I didn't really have anybody to tell me that they were
01:49a problem.
01:50My late wife, Karen, passed away here eight years ago.
01:56Beautiful, imaginative, inspirational, loyal.
01:59Karen made me a better man.
02:00She saw me at my worst, but her belief in me was the only thing I needed.
02:07I quit alcohol and drugs, and my children, they've never seen their father any other
02:13way.
02:14A good man is curious.
02:16We have to be able to change in response to the world that changes around us.
02:21I decided what's really crucial for me is to try to do the right thing.
02:26I think that people who are called good people are pretty aware that their life is not separate
02:32from the rest of creation.