• 3 months ago
by Rachel Vail
illustrated by Hyewon Yum
Transcript
00:00This is for Zachary with so much love.
00:14R.V.
00:15Forkada.
00:16H.Y.
00:17A Big Feelings Book.
00:20Sometimes I Grumbly Squinch.
00:23By Rachel Vail.
00:25Illustrated by Hi1yum.
00:28My name is Katie Honors and I'm a really nice kid.
00:31I always go along nicely.
00:34I'm happy to play any game when a friend comes over.
00:38Even if I lose, I am a good sport.
00:42Good game I say either way.
00:44I hardly frown.
00:46If there isn't mango sorbet.
00:49I say.
00:50That's okay, I like cookie dough too.
00:54Mom smiles and says I can get sprinkles which is extra.
00:58I didn't even ask.
01:01Katie is such a pleasure mom says.
01:04She really is dad agrees.
01:06I fit perfectly in their hugs.
01:10They are very proud of me.
01:12But there is something they don't know.
01:15Some mornings, my little brother Chuck crawls into my bed while I am still sleeping.
01:21He breathes hot on my eyelid.
01:23A drool from his wet mouth plonks onto my arm.
01:28The first word I say in the whole day is you.
01:31I say it very quietly though.
01:34I put on my beautiful new shirt.
01:37I love it.
01:39It cheers me right up.
01:41Chuck follows me down to breakfast and sits in my seat.
01:46That's my seat Chuck I tell him nicely.
01:48Oh Katie says mom.
01:51You don't mind do you?
01:53I do mind.
01:55But I say it's okay.
01:57And I move to Chuck's seat.
02:01Sometimes I grumbly squinch.
02:03My inside tighten and I think mean thoughts.
02:07I wish that I had a trampoline or a tree house or a giraffe instead of a brother.
02:12If I had one of those instead of a brother.
02:16I could sit in my own seat at breakfast.
02:19Here's your bibble bibble dad says to Chuck.
02:23Bibble bibble is what Chuck calls toast with butter.
02:27Chuck doesn't cereal.
02:29Chuck only likes bibble bibble.
02:32Chuck smashes his buttery fist into my bowl of cereal.
02:35Oh Chuck.
02:37No punching Katie's cereal silly.
02:41Mom says, putting him down on the floor.
02:44Say you're sorry to Katie.
02:47I wish I could pop him like a balloon.
02:50I wish he'd kaploom into a million badger lion bibble bibble crumbs.
02:55I wish he would disappear.
02:57But I don't yell those wishes.
03:00I grumbly squinch them right down.
03:03Chuck scampers over and grabs me with his milky hands.
03:08He snuggles his buttery face against my beautiful new shirt.
03:13I am a tight horrible squinch of grumble.
03:16Chuck loves you.
03:18Dad says.
03:20He pulls Chuck off me and carries him away singing and smiling.
03:25You okay?
03:26Mom asks me.
03:28I nod because I am always okay.
03:31But that nod is a lie.
03:33I am not okay.
03:35Anything about it is making me cry and then.
03:38I just can't grumbly squinch my feelings down anymore.
03:43Chuck ruins everything!
03:45I yell.
03:46He's sticky and stinky and he breathes on me and I want to sit in my own chair and everybody
03:51smiles at him but he is a buttery baby on my shirt and I wish I could kaploom him up.
03:56Then it's quiet.
03:57I'm scared.
03:59I didn't mean it.
04:01But also, I did mean it.
04:04They won't think I am such a pleasure anymore.
04:07I wish I could grumbly squinch it all back inside.
04:11Maybe I ruined everything.
04:14I wait for mom to yell that I am bad.
04:17To say.
04:18You go to your room and think about it!
04:20To look disappointed in me.
04:23I look up at mom's face.
04:26It is really hard sometimes.
04:28Mom whispers instead.
04:30Even when you love somebody.
04:33I nod.
04:35This nod is true.
04:37Mom says, I know.
04:39She holds her arms out to me.
04:42She folds me up safe in there.
04:45I still fit perfectly.
04:47Even thought I didn't grumbly squinch all my secret thoughts inside.
04:52There's room for the whole me.
04:55The end.