How to get an understanding of dealing with new-generation children? What are the small mistakes that parents make in nurturing their children that create differences in the relationship? How do attachment and expectation-free love help in nurturing and molding our children?
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00:00Dada has said so many things about parents and children's relations, generation gap,
00:08and these books, there are some published books, it's a beautiful book, giving so,
00:14opening the psychology of parents and children, and they are there, you can have that.
00:20They are unhappy, and parents are unhappy, even though there is love is there, attachment
00:26is tremendous, more than enough.
00:30See you must have experienced, when we were in India, we were, our parents, how much they
00:35were taking care of us, it was all normal, now it is abnormal, excess, too much excess.
00:41When the exams of students, our kids come, mothers are more, more worried than kids.
00:50So now this, this, this is not required.
00:53I remember when I was very small, young like this girl, I used to cry when my exam used
00:58to come.
00:59Why?
01:00I used to tell my mom and dad, see my, my friends, mom and dad are, all the, every day
01:07they are telling to their, my friends, go and read, go and read, and mom, you are not
01:13telling not a single time to read me.
01:16Why?
01:17That's why I used to cry, my mom is not telling me to go and read.
01:21I was crying for that, then she used to tell me, oh, you are all, all the time you are,
01:26you are getting first rank, once you read, once you read or once you listen in your school,
01:31that remains all the time in your mind, it never goes, your memory is so powerful, so
01:35why we have to tell you, go and read, go and read, and I used to cry, this, and now this
01:40is reverse.
01:41See, this is all also, excess is also bad, so some come to the normality, some normality
01:50is required, too much attachment, attachment, see right from childhood, when you are, you
01:56are newly born, newly born baby, you remember your, those days, your mind, your chit was
02:03so much in your kid, all the time you are thinking of your kid, even though you are
02:10cooking or working or something, but your mind was always with the kid, so this is embarrassing
02:16for them, they don't like, they want, when they are some, say, born or brought up, then
02:27four, five years or six years, then they feel embarrassing, they feel, they will find, they
02:32want some freedom, independence, they don't want you are watching this much, this gets
02:39reaction to you are, see, the love you broke, children will want away from you, because
02:49of excessive attachment, embarrassing for them, see, right from beginning, this understanding
02:56always goes wrong, and that's why, see, when most of the fathers, when their children are
03:08doing wrong, they shout, so kids are always scared of their dad, dad thinks that if I
03:18am strong and I show my anger, then kids are proper, they will listen, they will respect,
03:29of course, they will listen for five times, ten times, they will respect out, utterly,
03:34but inside love will go away, you understand, this respect is not with love, but with scaring,
03:44so how you are diverting your kids from real attachment, so these minor, minor things,
03:51but very important, they are, they are making your kids away from you, right from this age,
04:05and when they are grown up, teenage and young age, see, they won't like you, they will,
04:15like the teenage, when they are little free, they get some freedom, then what will happen,
04:23they won't find love from their parents, so they will try to get the love from their friends,
04:30then boyfriend, girlfriend, then sex, this is how, so those parents, they are really
04:40loving, real loving, not this worldly attachment expectation, their kids are tremendously,
04:49very humble, very deep understanding, respectful with their parents, and they will obey like
04:57anything, out of their, because they understand, my parents are doing so much thing for me,
05:04without asking, without asking for any expectation, anything from me, so it's my respect,
05:10my duty to respect them, to obey them, so I have found so many children turning from,
05:20from 180 degree turning.