Handa na ba ang lahat para sa iyakan session natin today? Alamin ang mga malungkot na kuwento nina Maritoni Fernandez at Marissa Raquiza, at kung paano nila nalagpasan ang lowest point sa buhay nila!
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00:00We walk hand in hand, we dream together. We giggle and laugh like kids forever.
00:12We're two different people, but we're having fun. We talk about anything under the sun.
00:19We are sisters, we are friends. We've got magic that never ends.
00:27I got you sis, you got me. The best of friends we'll always, always be.
00:38We always have fun, being together. You know me the best, we're friends forever.
00:46Through good times and bad, I'm here for you sis, right by your side.
00:52Hit or miss, we are sisters, we are friends. We've got magic that never ends.
01:01I got you sis, you got me. The best of friends, the best of friends.
01:09The best of friends we'll always, always be. We are sisters, we are sisters.
01:18Good morning mga sis, at sa iyon rin sis. What is in store for us today?
01:25Well, today is going to be a touching and inspiring morning for all of us.
01:31Dahil makakasama po natin ang dalawang matapang at matibay at kahangahangang mga babae.
01:38At syempre isang ina na magsha-share sa atin ang istorya ng kanilang buhay.
01:43Dalawang magkaibang kwento na siguradong aantig at makakapunan natin ng lesson or mga tips.
01:51Makakula, makakahingi tayong strength, kumbaga.
01:56Mapagpunan natin ng strength, matututo po tayo sa kanila.
02:00Oo naman, dalawang kwento magbibigay ng, hindi lang po ng inspirasyon, pero ng aral din po.
02:05Yan ang hatid namin sa inyo ngayong araw na to.
02:08At kaya po sinasabi namin, warning na po yan, medyo magtabi na po kayo ng tissue sa tabi niyo.
02:13Mukhang kakailangan niyo ito.
02:15Pero lahat po yan ay mapapanood niyo dito lang sa...
02:19SIS!
02:29Last year po nabiscover niya na may guest sponsor pala siya.
02:32And now, cleared na siya.
02:35Pero, may possibility pa rin na muli itong magbalik.
02:39What's in store for Ms. Maritani Fernandez ngayong year 2002?
02:44Welcome to SIS Antonita!
02:45Hi Jem!
02:46Kumusta ka?
02:47Talaga, one of the very friends that I have na talagang Antonita.
02:50Oo nga eh.
02:51Kasi hindi niya, si Maritani was a good friend.
02:55Good friend from way back.
02:56Oo, from my disco days.
02:58Oo nga eh.
02:59Eto, let's start.
03:01Did it ever cross your mind that you would go through something like this?
03:05No way.
03:06Never.
03:07I mean, I think at our age, no Jels?
03:09Parang, that's the last thing you think of.
03:11Cancer, you think of is for old people.
03:13Oo.
03:14Right?
03:15I mean, that's really the way I thought.
03:17Parang, sure, alam ko na I heard of cancer.
03:20Pero, most of the people na naririnig ko, yung mga matatandang, they've lived their life already.
03:25No way.
03:26Ikaw, at least.
03:27How old are you?
03:28I'm 32.
03:2932.
03:30Imagine that, 32.
03:31So yung mga nanonood mo, kahit na 27 lang.
03:3428, you never know.
03:35Hindi niyo po alam.
03:36Tsaka kahit na one checkup, it doesn't always come out eh.
03:39No, it doesn't.
03:40O, so ito.
03:41When did you find out?
03:42Paano mo nalaman?
03:43Okay, two years ago, I found a small lump on my right breast.
03:47Dito?
03:48O, dito sa ilalim.
03:49Ano yung naramdaman mo lang?
03:50Diba pag naliligo ka?
03:51O, pag naliligo ka.
03:52Tinest mo talaga.
03:53Yeah, I always check.
03:54Kasi there's a, meron pong paraan para mag-check it.
03:56Yeah.
03:57I was in the shower, I was feeling.
03:59Sabi ko, parang may matigas na bukol.
04:02Maliit na maliit lang.
04:04Iba siya sa, diba?
04:06Usually bago ka magkaroon, medyo may tenderness, merong mga matitigas na parts ng breast.
04:12O.
04:13So, this was totally different from that?
04:15Actually, it's very similar eh.
04:17Ah, malapit.
04:18Very similar.
04:19Kaya nung nagpunta ko sa OB gynecologist, pina-check ko sa kanya.
04:22Sabi niya, the first thing she said, ay hindi, mag-memens ka lang.
04:26Hintayin na lang natin after your period.
04:28Ganyan, we'll check it again.
04:30So, nagkaroon ka?
04:32It was still there.
04:33And the whole time I was telling her, let's check it na, ganyan.
04:36Sabi niya, alam mo, you're too young to get that.
04:39Doktor na nagsasabi niya, ga?
04:41Oo, you're too young.
04:42Imposible.
04:43Ganyan ang mag-
04:44Sabi sa'yo?
04:45Yeah.
04:46And then, last March, no, last January, my mom got very sick.
04:50Labas-pasok siya ng Makati Med.
04:52Ang dina-diagnose sa kanya, pulmonary embolism.
04:56So, nung nasa Makati Med siya, ako yung panganay sa amin, Jel.
04:59So, ako yung nagbabantay kay mommy.
05:01You know, she was there, and parang feeling ko, adun pa rin yung lump.
05:05Alam mo, total mommy's confined in Makati Med.
05:08Nasa baba lang yung doktor ko.
05:10Matsi-check ko na nga, nandito na rin lang ako.
05:12Eh, Quezon City, bahay ko eh.
05:14So, parang to make a trip just for this is such, you know, such a hassle.
05:18E-deal, kasi matraffic.
05:19Yun na nga.
05:20So, I figured, alam mo, nandito na rin lang ako.
05:22Hit two birds with one stone.
05:24I went to my doctor again.
05:26Inatingin ko.
05:27Sabi niya, alam mo, since it's bothering you so much,
05:30although alam kong wala yan, sabi niya gano'n,
05:32magpamamo ka na.
05:34Then, nagpamamo ko.
05:35Wala, negative.
05:37So, nakahinga ka?
05:38Wala.
05:39Talagang relief, di ba?
05:40Parang, wow, thank God.
05:42Tapos, sabi niya, kinulit ko pa rin.
05:44Wala, pero meron ako nararamdaman.
05:47You know, nobody knows our bodies the way we do.
05:50Of course.
05:51Kahit asawa mo na, they don't know your body the way you know it.
05:55So, sabi ko sa kanya,
05:56is there any other way to check?
05:58Sabi niya, sonogram.
06:00Sonogram daw, parang yung ultra.
06:02Di ba, yung may gel, ganyan, and everything.
06:05May TV, yung screen.
06:07So, ginawa nila yun.
06:08Kitang-kita.
06:09As in, andun.
06:11A black lump.
06:12Okay.
06:13Tapos, ano, they decided to operate?
06:15No, they referred me to a breast doctor.
06:18So, I went to the breast doctor.
06:20Still there, in that hospital.
06:23Cha-check nila ganyan.
06:24Sabi niya, you know, it's nothing to worry about.
06:26When you have three days free,
06:28sabi niya, alam ko, artista ka, busy ka, ganyan.
06:30So, kung meron kang mga three days na libre,
06:34pumasok ka lang dito, we'll make a small incision,
06:37tanggalin ko, we'll stitch it, you'll be fine.
06:39Tapos, ginawa?
06:40Hindi.
06:41Hindi?
06:42Hindi.
06:43So, my mom, all this time talagang lumalala niyo yung mommy ko.
06:45Tapos, panicking na.
06:46Sabi ko, mommy, the doctors here can't decide what's really wrong with you.
06:49One day, they're saying, it's this, the next.
06:51Sabi ko, can you just get out of the hospital?
06:54Magpagaling ka ng konti, and then I'll take you to the States.
06:58Para sigurado.
06:59Kasi parang nawawala na ako ng tiwala at that point.
07:03Parang almost two months, in and out siya talaga of the hospital.
07:07So, finally, you went to the States?
07:09Finally, we went.
07:10In West Virginia, I have an uncle who's a doctor.
07:13So, nagpunta kami doon.
07:15Bundok yun.
07:16Sa scene talagang, oh my goodness, in the middle of nowhere.
07:19So, we went there.
07:20My mom got checked.
07:22Nothing wrong with her.
07:23Misdiagnosed siya dito.
07:25So, mali ang ginabinibigyan na doon.
07:26For one month, iniinject siya sa chan, ng blood thinner.
07:29Eh, so, yung sayo?
07:30By chance.
07:32Nagpunta ka na rin, para masigurado na rin.
07:34Sabi ko sa kanya, total, nandito na rin lang tayo.
07:36Nagkamali sila sa'yo.
07:37Oh my God.
07:38Papano kung pati sa'kin nagkamali?
07:40E, dinala ko yung results.
07:42So, chineka?
07:43Chinek.
07:44Sabi sa'kin ng doctor,
07:46we don't take chances in America.
07:48So?
07:49Tinanggal.
07:50The following day, after the operation,
07:53they came back to me and they said,
07:54it's malignant.
07:55It's cancer.
07:56Oh my God.
07:57Anong ginawa mo?
07:58What happened?
07:59What was your reaction?
08:00How did you feel?
08:01Shocked.
08:02I mean, you know, definitely.
08:03They told you, you have cancer?
08:06Yung feeling mo, gels.
08:07Parang, nagalit pa nga ako sa doktor.
08:10Parang feeling ko, you know, in my mind,
08:13you're so stupid.
08:14You don't know what you're saying.
08:15I went already to two doctors in the Philippines.
08:16They said, it's nothing.
08:17Now you're gonna tell me I have cancer?
08:19I was mad.
08:20That was my inisial.
08:21Kasi parang, you know, I have a full life.
08:24You're gonna tell me all of a sudden that I could be dead?
08:27Oo.
08:28Diba?
08:29Binigyan ka ba ng, let's say,
08:30meron ka bang biglang binigyan ka naman ng taning?
08:33Meron mo nga.
08:34Meron mo nga sabi ko.
08:35Sabi ko sa kanila, okay,
08:36now I have cancer.
08:37Tell me how long?
08:38Kasi parang, diba, you wanna get everything in order na.
08:41Oo, kaagad.
08:42Yun yung iniisip ko.
08:43I mean, if I'm gonna die,
08:44how many months, years, whatever do I have left?
08:48Nasagot mo naman sa akin,
08:49we don't know till you've had your second surgery.
08:52Itong nandito.
08:53Yan dyan.
08:54Sasabi ko, wait a minute.
08:55First you're telling me I have cancer
08:57and then now you can't even tell me
08:59what I want to know, what I need to know
09:02for my peace of mind.
09:04Diba? No daw.
09:05So I have to wait.
09:06That's the longest week of my whole life.
09:10I had to have the second surgery.
09:11Tapos nung natanggal na yung mga lymph nodes,
09:13chinect na nila and everything.
09:15When they told me that it was all negative,
09:17sabi nila sa akin,
09:19you're okay.
09:20You're in stage one.
09:21So long as you go through the treatments,
09:23you're gonna be fine.
09:25So this whole time you were with your mom?
09:27Yes.
09:28Samo nakuha yung strength mo at this point of time?
09:30Because this is the most trying time of your life.
09:32I mean, I've known you for a long time,
09:34but pili ko parang this would be one of the most trying times of your life.
09:36Chels, you know, it's so funny.
09:37I know that people probably know me as matapang, mataray and all that.
09:43When you're faced with something like this,
09:45it's like you harness all your strength
09:48and you just focus it on that.
09:50And for me talagang God,
09:52kasi when you're faced with death,
09:55you know that there's no one that can make you feel better.
10:00There's no one that can heal you
10:02except Him up there.
10:05Talagang, it's so hard to describe,
10:08but it's your faith.
10:09It's pure faith.
10:11100%.
10:12Siya lang talagang nagbigay sa akin ng lakas.
10:15He's the only one.
10:16This is the time na parang, okay,
10:19I have nowhere else to go but Him.
10:23At the end of our lives, Chelly,
10:24I don't care who you are,
10:25I don't care what you think of,
10:28even if you're an atheist.
10:30If you're faced with death,
10:32talagang you have nowhere to turn.
10:34He never resented the fact that,
10:36I'm so close to you.
10:37Bakit ako ba?
10:38Never.
10:39You never asked Him,
10:40why me?
10:41No.
10:42Because I knew there was a purpose.
10:44I knew eh.
10:45From the very beginning,
10:47I had the feeling that,
10:48you know what,
10:49it's me,
10:50akong pinili niya.
10:52Because I know I'm in a position to help others,
10:55to inform others.
10:57And you know what,
10:58if that's not His purpose,
10:59if His purpose is for me to really die na,
11:02then who am I to question?
11:04So,
11:05if you had this,
11:07ano na isip mo?
11:09What went through your mind?
11:10You have a daughter.
11:11That's what went through my mind.
11:12And you have a husband.
11:13You know, I felt,
11:14talagang,
11:15God, if you really want to take me na,
11:17please let it be at a time when my daughter is ready.
11:21You know?
11:22Kasi,
11:23you know our husbands,
11:24they will always have the strength for us.
11:26But my six-year-old child,
11:29what really broke my heart is,
11:31she needs a mom.
11:33God, you know,
11:34whatever it is,
11:35whatever your plan is,
11:37what about my baby?
11:40Diba, yun lang ang kinikwestiyon ko talaga kay Lord.
11:42I never questioned the fact that,
11:44bakit ako?
11:46Or,
11:47why this disease?
11:48Or,
11:49is it really my time na?
11:50None of that.
11:52The only thing I felt was sadness for Alexi.
11:55Yun lang talaga.
11:56And that's where I,
11:57eventually,
11:58when I was going through my treatments,
11:59everything,
12:00dun ko kinuha yung strength.
12:01Strength ko.
12:02To fight for her.
12:06Maritony will share with us some more of her stories
12:08when Sis returns.
12:19Okay, we're back.
12:20We're still with Maritony.
12:22Ton,
12:25syempre, we all know that,
12:26you know, cancer,
12:27you have to go through chemotherapy.
12:29Maraming beses hindi na pag-uusapan
12:31yung process na nangyayari sa chemotherapy.
12:34Maraming nagsasabi,
12:35mahirap,
12:37nakakapanghina,
12:38masakit.
12:39Ano ba talaga yun?
12:40I mean,
12:41you went through it.
12:42What happened?
12:43What were the changes?
12:45Okay,
12:46first I have to explain to you,
12:47chemotherapy is a precautionary thing for cancer.
12:51Kasi ang cancer,
12:52parang syang root ng puno.
12:55Kunsaan nag-umpisa yun,
12:56hindi lang sya doon magsistay.
12:59Parang syang root,
13:00nag-grow sya,
13:01and it expands throughout your whole body,
13:03and it travels through your blood system.
13:06So you need chemotherapy.
13:07Parang sya,
13:08it acts like a pakngan.
13:10Pag inject yan,
13:12papasok yan sa katawan mo,
13:13through your veins.
13:14Hahanapin niya lahat ng cancer cells,
13:16at kakainin niya.
13:18Ang problema doon,
13:19hindi lang cancer cells ang kinahain niya.
13:22All your healthy cells,
13:23na fast-producing also,
13:25like yung mga kuko natin,
13:26diba kasi,
13:27mabilis sumaba ang kuko,
13:28so your cells there are regenerating all the time.
13:31So ganito,
13:32habang hindi tumutubong hair,
13:34actually it falls.
13:35Yeah.
13:36So,
13:37nangyayari sa'yo to,
13:38I mean,
13:39let's face it,
13:40beautiful si Marie Toni,
13:41if only she had long hair.
13:43Friend talaga kita.
13:44Oo nga.
13:45Syempre,
13:46nakikita mo,
13:47ibang-ibang e tsura mo.
13:48I mean,
13:49how did you feel?
13:50I mean,
13:51you know,
13:52we women can be very vain,
13:53and then suddenly,
13:54I'm going through all this.
13:56You know,
13:57may taning na ang buhay mo,
13:58tas ganito pa e tsura mo.
13:59Hindi ba?
14:00Anong nasa isip mo ng mga oras na yun?
14:03Gels,
14:04you know,
14:05all that just doesn't matter.
14:06It doesn't.
14:08You know,
14:09vanity is gone.
14:10You don't think of any of that.
14:12Ang iisipin mo na lang,
14:13Lord,
14:14I want to live.
14:15That's the only thing you think of.
14:17I don't,
14:18I couldn't care less
14:19whether I would go bald forever.
14:21I couldn't care less
14:22if my hair never grew back
14:24so long as I'm alive.
14:26What did your daughter say
14:27when she saw you going through all this pain?
14:30She would sit at the end of the bed,
14:32and she would say,
14:33Mommy, please don't die.
14:38How about Alex?
14:40Alex was very strong.
14:42I think he knew that
14:43he needed to not show emotion,
14:46you know,
14:47para lumakas ang loob ko,
14:49to fight,
14:50you know,
14:51and he'd not bathe me.
14:52He won't bathe me.
14:53Para...
14:54May kaya mo yan.
14:55Alika, stand up.
14:56You know, ganun.
14:57Kahit hirap, nahirap, nahirap ako.
15:00He really, you know,
15:01he would force me.
15:02He would be the one to push me.
15:05Kasi kung ganun din siya,
15:07ganun si Alex,
15:08wala na talagang,
15:09di ba?
15:10It's so easy to fall into the trap
15:12of just giving up
15:13because it's so hard.
15:17So, after the chemo,
15:18after they said,
15:19I said,
15:20Ton, you're gonna be fine.
15:22Radiation pa ha.
15:23After chemo,
15:24meron siya.
15:25Radiation naman is yung,
15:27yung for the tumor site itself.
15:30Laser yan.
15:31A lot of people who don't need
15:32to go through chemo
15:33go through radiation.
15:35It's a walk in the park daw
15:36compared to chemo.
15:38Kasi chemo talaga,
15:39it's like walking through fire.
15:41Para kang nilagyan ng poison sa katawan
15:44na sabi ko nga dun sa doctor,
15:46this is supposed to make me feel better.
15:48Why am I so sick?
15:50Mas mahina pa ako nung nagkikimo ko
15:53kesa nung hindi pa ako nagkikimo.
15:56Diyos ko, ano ba yan?
15:58Talagang, you go through a lot.
16:00You go through,
16:01parang I can't even imagine.
16:02I hope you never have to.
16:05Not even on your worst enemy, no?
16:07No, not even.
16:08So, here then,
16:09the doctor says,
16:10okay, for now you're cleared.
16:12But there is a possibility,
16:14maaari ka parin magkaroon ng,
16:17what do you call it?
16:18Recurrence.
16:19Ginagahandaan mo ba ito?
16:21At paano?
16:22I refuse to believe
16:24that I will ever have a recurrence again.
16:27I believe so much in God.
16:29I believe that He healed me for a purpose.
16:32And it's, I claim it,
16:35na it will never happen again.
16:38So now that you have your second life,
16:41what do you plan to do?
16:43Actually, it's so hard to know after.
16:46Everything has turned upside down.
16:48When you're faced with death,
16:50everything changes.
16:52Things that mattered before don't matter anymore.
16:55You know, things,
16:57yung mga bagay na kala natin importante,
17:00hindi pala.
17:02So I don't know.
17:04I'm still gathering my perspective.
17:07I'm still praying hard about what I should do
17:10with the rest of my life.
17:12I'm just, right now,
17:14I'm just taking it a day at a time.
17:15I'm just so grateful.
17:17Nagpapasalamat talaga ako na I'm still here.
17:21Nakakakita pa ako ng morning.
17:24Sa gabi, nakakatulog pa ako.
17:26Every day, nahalika ako pa yung anak ko.
17:28Diba?
17:29Yun lang, yun lang I'm so happy na
17:31andito ko ngayon.
17:33I'm able to share my experience with everybody.
17:37For me, that's such a privilege.
17:39I want to encourage people.
17:41Kaya nga, sabi ko sa'yo,
17:43three months ako nagbakasyon bago ako umi dito.
17:45Kasi gusto kong pakita sa tao na,
17:48alam nyo, hindi madali ang cancer.
17:50I'm not going to pretend that it's easy.
17:53And I hope that just because they see the way I look now,
17:56they don't think na,
17:58eh bakit ganyan ang itsura niya?
18:02I want to look good to encourage them
18:05that, hey, you know what?
18:07Cancer doesn't necessarily mean the end.
18:09The end of it and be all finished na.
18:12Kasi a lot of the times, diba, parang ang feeling ng tao,
18:15ito na yun, cancer, patay ka na.
18:18No, look at me and know that I have not gone through something easy.
18:22But know that you can have the victory.
18:25You know, you can come out of it.
18:27For someone who suspects na,
18:30parang I have a love or something,
18:33what would you tell them?
18:35Please don't be scared.
18:37Because I know a lot of women, they just,
18:39hindi nila pinapansin
18:41kasi may fear.
18:42Let me just be clear on this ano.
18:44I think in Asia,
18:46the Philippines is the leading,
18:49number one po tayo sa breast cancer for women.
18:53And even men can have breast cancer.
18:55Definitely.
18:56So, ang problema lang kasi sa atin,
18:58yung awareness, marami po sa atin ang hindi aware.
19:01O natatakot.
19:03What would you tell them?
19:05Wag niyo pong hintayin.
19:07In cancer, there is no cure.
19:10But the earlier you detect it,
19:13the more your chances are for treating it.
19:17You can, matitreat lang po yan,
19:20kung maagapan yung maagapan.
19:22Alam mo, kung two years ago,
19:24kung pinacheck to at pinatingan,
19:26hindi na ako magkikimo.
19:28O, hindi mo napadala.
19:30Because lumaki na e.
19:31Lumaki na siya e.
19:33Para po yang sira sa ipin,
19:35pag may sira kayo, kahit maliit,
19:38papastahan niyo na kagad.
19:40O, hindi pa.
19:41Diba? Para hindi lumala.
19:43Wag niyo hintayin na magkaroot kanal pa kayo.
19:45It's the same with breast cancer, Jels.
19:48If you catch it early enough,
19:50you don't have anything to worry about.
19:52Kaya araw-arawin ninyo yan.
19:54Ako talaga ngayon, araw-araw,
19:56lahat ng kaibigan ko,
19:57hey, check yourself, ha?
19:59Kahit I don't care if it sounds, you know,
20:01like woman to woman, diba?
20:03Parang, uy, Jels, check everyday mo yan.
20:05Kasi it's something that I don't want to see people go through.
20:10It's so hard.
20:14You don't want.
20:15And if you have family history,
20:17it's worse.
20:18Your chances are 50% worse.
20:21So alamin niyo, tanungin niyo lola niyo, you know,
20:24Lola, nagkaroon ba kayo ng cancer?
20:26Meron ba tayo sa pamilya niyan?
20:28Kasi kung meron,
20:30mas malaki ang posibilidad na
20:33magkakaroon din kayo.
20:35Well, we've known each other for a while.
20:37I know.
20:38Tell me now, what are your dreams?
20:41Ano pa ba may goals ka?
20:43What do you want to achieve?
20:45I mean, you've got a new life.
20:47You've got a new perspective on things.
20:49So, what else do you want to do?
20:51What are your dreams?
20:53Jels, now life is so simple for me.
20:56You know, like I said,
20:58I just want to be alive.
21:00I want to breathe everyday.
21:02I want to see my daughter grow up.
21:05I have no more...
21:07I've died to all my own ambitions.
21:13You know, of course,
21:15my only purpose now is to really,
21:17if I can share what I've gone through,
21:20then that's enough for me.
21:22That's really enough for me.
21:23I just want to be a help to people
21:25who are going through the same thing
21:27that I went through.
21:29I want to tell them that,
21:30hey, you know what?
21:31Faith is what got me through this.
21:33Believe in yourself that you can do it.
21:36And lastly, know that there are people
21:39who need you.
21:40You know, you have to focus on somebody
21:42na mahal na mahal mo.
21:44And you have a reason to live.
21:46And things that cost money,
21:49they're not everything.
21:51They're nothing.
21:52Because they can't give you your life.
21:55They can't.
21:58If I were Alexi,
22:01and you know that there is such possibility
22:03for her when she grows up,
22:05to get the same cancer or whatever
22:09that you went through,
22:11what would you tell her?
22:12What would you tell her?
22:15I would tell her that first,
22:16I'm so sorry.
22:18Because it's probably because of me
22:21that she will get it.
22:23Because once your parent has it,
22:25the chances for you to get it is higher.
22:28Although with me talagang walang cancer sa family ko.
22:32But it's just higher.
22:34I guess just I would tell her,
22:36you know, anak, whatever it is,
22:40love life.
22:41Live every day to the fullest.
22:45I'm not God,
22:46so I cannot say until when you're going to live.
22:51But I want you never to take
22:53a single breath for granted.
22:59And I really pray to God that it never happens to you.
23:03That's all I can do.
23:04What else can I say?
23:06But if it does, be strong and fight it.
23:11It's the only way.
23:12It's the only way.
23:13On a lighter note,
23:14would you want to go back to work?
23:16Yes, of course.
23:17Of course I want to go back to work.
23:19Oo, diba?
23:20I mean, work is what keeps us going.
23:22Tara!
23:24Tapos na, diba?
23:25I mean, I will never forget.
23:27I will never.
23:28You should never.
23:29Never.
23:30That's another thing, you know,
23:31I hope that people who go through
23:33or have gone through what I've been through,
23:35they put in their hearts and in their minds
23:37that just because it's over for them,
23:39just because the episode of that part of their life is tapos na,
23:43don't forget it.
23:44Share it.
23:45That's why I'm here, you know.
23:46I tell the world now,
23:48hey, you know what?
23:49I'm a breast cancer survivor.
23:50I survived it.
23:51I survived it.
23:52Diba?
23:53Kasi, so many people,
23:54they're just quiet about it after.
23:56You know, when I came out on TV the first time,
23:58I'm walking in the street,
23:59and people come up to me,
24:01oh, you know what?
24:02I'm also a survivor.
24:04You know the way I feel?
24:05Parang, then where are you?
24:06Why aren't you telling people?
24:10Don't be ashamed.
24:11Diba?
24:12We should be more aware.
24:13So, kayo pong mga nanonood,
24:15ako, huwag natin i-take for granted.
24:17Alagaan pong natin ang mga sarili natin,
24:19lalo na yung mga mommies,
24:20may mga anak tayo na,
24:22syempre gusto natin makita lumaki
24:24at maaruga.
24:26Ang tanggay paraan lang,
24:27huwag tayo matakot.
24:28Let's always check ourselves.
24:30Let's, you know,
24:31let's be very honest,
24:33and, you know, come out.
24:35Huwag tayo matakot.
24:36Dapat hindi tayo matakot sa doktor.
24:38Kung matakot sa doktor lang ang problema natin,
24:39ako, walang malayaan,
24:40kesa naman,
24:41maging mas malala pa,
24:43ang maraming problema.
24:45You know, Ton,
24:46it's really a joy talking to you today.
24:48I enjoyed myself.
24:50I learned a lot.
24:51Yeah, I hope so.
24:53I hope that's my purpose.
24:55Magbabalik pa po, sis.
25:06Magbabalik ko tayo sa kwento ni Marie Tonican.
25:08Ito pong next guest natin,
25:10has a different story to tell.
25:12This is a little close to home dahil, ha,
25:14nanay din po ako.
25:16Please welcome on, sis, Marisa Rakiza.
25:19Hello, good morning.
25:20Good morning.
25:23This is probably still a hard time for you,
25:26but how have you been?
25:29It has been very difficult.
25:31Like, sometimes you'd just be walking,
25:33you'd be okay,
25:34then the next you just feel that your tears are falling.
25:37Like, you just see someone,
25:39oh, it's the hair or the eyes.
25:42Something that resembles her.
25:44Precisely.
25:45How close is she as a daughter?
25:49She was a daughter that anyone would ever love to have.
25:53Close kayo?
25:54Definitely.
25:55Did she tell you her secrets?
25:57She did.
25:58It was just,
26:00she wasn't just a daughter to me,
26:02she was more of a friend to me too.
26:07It worked both ways.
26:08What did you like doing together?
26:11Well, whenever she'd fix me up.
26:14Like, she'd just comb my hair,
26:18fix me up,
26:19then choose the clothes that I'd wear.
26:21So that's how she was.
26:23Then she'd shop and get together.
26:24Yeah.
26:25Because she would say,
26:26I don't like your dress.
26:27Let her change and I'd say,
26:28no, this is what would be nice for you.
26:31Would you say that she was kind of spoiled?
26:34Because she's the only girl,
26:35she's your only daughter.
26:36No, on the contrary, she wasn't.
26:37She wasn't spoiled?
26:38She wasn't.
26:39How many kids do you have?
26:41I have four kids.
26:43Four kids and she's the youngest.
26:44She's the second.
26:45She's the second.
26:47How did your other children feel
26:49when they first heard of the accident?
26:52Of course, there would always be the denial,
26:54no, it's not true,
26:55or more on,
26:57it wasn't really as bad as it was.
27:00Was she close to her brothers?
27:02She was.
27:03Because she was very thoughtful.
27:05It's like she'd find,
27:06she'd get out of her way to bring you something
27:08even though she knew that you liked.
27:11So that's what they'll always miss about her.
27:16Let's look back a little.
27:17On the day that you were told
27:19that she was in an accident.
27:22Okay.
27:23Did you know that she was out?
27:26No, I knew she was in school.
27:29So I just received this call
27:31from a friend
27:33whom she was supposed to be with.
27:36And then she told me,
27:37Tita, did you know that
27:40that she met an accident?
27:42What?
27:43Where?
27:44Are you kidding?
27:47Ordoneta.
27:48So all along, I thought it was in Ordoneta.
27:50Village, Makati,
27:51because they were in Las Marinas for San Agustin.
27:55So when she told me,
27:56in Pangasinan.
27:58No, tell me it's not true.
28:00Then I tried to compose myself.
28:03And then when it began to sink in,
28:07I just almost collapsed.
28:09Because I couldn't believe it.
28:10What am I going to do now?
28:11Like how is she?
28:13Where?
28:14Whatever.
28:16When did you first see her?
28:17Because she was in Ordoneta, Pangasinan.
28:19And I was speaking to Mayor Marquez the other day.
28:23And he said that in Pangasinan,
28:26they weren't allowed to fly her out
28:28because she needed, of course,
28:30the waiver from the parents.
28:32When did you first see her?
28:35I saw her when we arrived at Pangasinan.
28:41That was already 1 a.m. the next day.
28:43So we were really shocked.
28:46Because we didn't know what to do.
28:48Like the news would say that
28:49they would be flown together here.
28:51So we really didn't know.
28:52There was no communication.
28:54So when we arrived there,
28:56that was the only time we found out
28:57that she wasn't stable enough to be flown,
29:00which was precisely the reason
29:01why they were not flown together.
29:04Everybody knows that Vandolf is her boyfriend.
29:08And they were together during the accident.
29:11How were you close to Vandolf?
29:13Was Vandolf close to the family, to the brothers?
29:17No.
29:18Because I just met him once.
29:24And it was perhaps more on...
29:27They'd been schoolmates since they were in kindergarten.
29:31So it wasn't really something like...
29:35They just met each other or something.
29:38So what I noticed was that
29:39ever since he was in kindergarten,
29:41he would always give her chocolates.
29:43But we took it lightly
29:44because we didn't think
29:45it was anything really that serious.
29:47And as they grew up,
29:48it was something like...
29:51They weren't close
29:52because they would always be bickering.
29:55They would always fight.
29:56Little arguments.
29:57So nothing.
29:58It was really nothing.
29:59And then she would tell me
30:01that he was beginning to like her,
30:04court her more seriously.
30:06But that was it.
30:07It wasn't really as serious as we thought it was.
30:14Of course, being a mother,
30:16even if, of course,
30:18they're friends who are close to you,
30:20when something like this happens,
30:23initial reaction,
30:25the initial reaction, of course,
30:27you can't avoid getting a little angry.
30:31Like, why?
30:34Yeah, okay.
30:35So for me, it's not really getting angry
30:38because if I'm going to put that in my head,
30:41it's going to make things worse
30:43because I want to be level-headed.
30:45Like, what am I supposed to do with the situation?
30:48The first instinct that came,
30:50I want my daughter to be better.
30:53I'm not going to put anger ahead
30:55and not think wisely
30:56in order to make proper decisions for her.
30:59So the first thing I said,
31:03I just want to make her better,
31:06nothing else.
31:07And then all the rest could come,
31:09would follow.
31:10In most of the interviews,
31:11it's you that we see.
31:12We don't see her dad.
31:14How was Ish's relationship with his dad?
31:17They were okay.
31:18But you see,
31:19the father is hypertensive.
31:23He had always been during,
31:25while she was at the hospital,
31:27it was always 230 over 130.
31:31That was his BP.
31:32So it's not really that easy
31:35for anyone just to be talking to him.
31:37So that's why I had to make a front.
31:41Be the strong one.
31:43Even if deep inside,
31:44I'm weaker than anyone else could ever imagine.
31:49This is going to be your first Christmas
31:51without her.
31:54Are you going to change any of your plans?
31:57Are you going to not celebrate Christmas
31:59the way you used to?
32:00Just so you won't remember,
32:04you won't feel the pain.
32:05So for us, it's not just the Christmas,
32:08it's the everyday thing.
32:09It's like in the morning,
32:11when you wake up,
32:13because I'd wake her up
32:14and I'd say,
32:15Oh, Ish, it's time.
32:16It's not that way anymore.
32:18So it's the everyday.
32:20It's the everyday loss that you see.
32:23It's practically our life.
32:27Everyone's life has really changed.
32:32Do you intend to preserve her room?
32:35Keep it the way it is?
32:36So every time,
32:37there'd always be this nice memory?
32:39No, because actually,
32:40our house is under renovation
32:41and she designed her own room
32:43and we intend to follow the way she wanted.
32:48It was also very clear
32:49that her coffin was not just something very plain.
32:53It was decorated with neon paint
32:56and you had pink balloons.
32:58That's not traditional for someone
33:02who you just lost, right?
33:05Those balloons were given by her friends
33:08because she'd always tell her friends
33:10that her favorite colors would be white and pink.
33:16She would even tell them that on her burial,
33:21she'd like everyone to be in white.
33:23So I didn't know about the balloons.
33:25It was just her friend's idea.
33:27About the coffin,
33:28we didn't want it to be morbid.
33:30We wanted it to be more gaily.
33:34In fact, while at the coffin,
33:36I couldn't even come close to her.
33:39I couldn't even see her that way,
33:41so the only time I had the chance to see her
33:43was when she was going to be buried.
33:45Before that, I couldn't come close.
33:48Whenever I'd be a bit close,
33:50I'd have to get away.
33:52I didn't want to see her that way.
33:54It's very difficult
33:55because never mind if she was sick,
33:58it wasn't that way.
34:00What was your fondest memory of Ishi?
34:03Did you have a last talk
34:06before the accident happened?
34:13Did you have a last talk together?
34:15No, we'd always have these small talks.
34:17It wasn't really like a last talk or what.
34:20The small talks would always be how she was in school.
34:23She'd always ask me how I had been that day too.
34:27It's the everyday thing that she would do.
34:30It was like a routine that you're going to miss.
34:33The letter that I found
34:35four days after she was in the hospital,
34:37that really struck me most
34:39because there were some things that she said
34:41that she couldn't tell me in person.
34:44And I didn't realize
34:47how much I also meant to her,
34:50just as she really meant to me.
34:53That's how it was.
34:55Sometimes we put off things
34:59that we need to tell people that we love.
35:01Did you think you put off something
35:03that maybe you weren't able to tell?
35:06I'd always tell her that I loved her
35:09but I never got the chance to tell her
35:13how much I really did.
35:16I never really had that chance.
35:19It's just love, that's all.
35:21I guess as a mom, just saying like that
35:24will never be enough.
35:25Never.
35:27More touching stories from Marie Serraquiza
35:30in the return of Sis.