• 4 months ago
The Three Badasses Who Want Me FULL EPISODE Watch Free Movies
Transcript
00:00:00Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 under 30 list, arrives at Atlanta today.
00:00:06What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten stage no one knows.
00:00:10Angela, my next door neighbor, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:15If your mother-in-law sees, she's gonna throw a big fit again.
00:00:20Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:00:22What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply it to your penniless self?
00:00:28And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:00:32Alright, everybody get out!
00:00:35We got an important guest coming!
00:00:39You!
00:00:44You deaf? I said pack up and scram!
00:00:47I paid the stall fee already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:00:54You wanna say that again?
00:00:58You know who's visiting today?
00:01:00Ellen freakin' Musk! One of the richest people in the world!
00:01:04Ellen Musk?
00:01:05Of course, a hick like you probably never heard of her.
00:01:07Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:01:11Really? Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market?
00:01:17You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:01:22Coming to see you?
00:01:24Alright, you know what? I'll play your game.
00:01:27If she does this so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:01:34Deal.
00:01:42Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within ten minutes.
00:01:46Or else, you're fired.
00:01:52Hmm.
00:02:08Prepare the limo. Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:02:18Ah, your ten minutes is almost up.
00:02:20Good. Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:02:23Five.
00:02:24Four.
00:02:27Three.
00:02:30Two.
00:02:31One.
00:02:35Ellen! Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk!
00:02:38Uh, Ellen! Uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:02:45How's my boss pitch?
00:02:47Kickin' ass, girlfriend!
00:02:48So, how do you, like...
00:02:52She's my boss?
00:02:53Eh, I prefer business partner or best friend.
00:02:58No way.
00:03:02Well?
00:03:07No! No, no, I'm sorry for offending your boss! No, I won't do it again!
00:03:14Alright, that's enough. We're not tyrants here.
00:03:18Sir.
00:03:23Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:03:31You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:03:33My honorary bride.
00:03:36You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker!
00:03:41Who are you?
00:03:44Where is she?
00:03:45Atlanta. And you were right. It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:03:49My clever bride. I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:03:58Max, prep the jet. I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:04:06Dr. Wilson, Benning Sterling's on the move. He's headed to Atlanta.
00:04:09Atlanta? The game is afoot. I'm going.
00:04:12Wait, Dr. Wilson. The Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:04:15He can wait. I need to pick up my bride.
00:04:21Dr. Wilson!
00:04:28General Eisenhower reporting, sir!
00:04:31Benning Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta!
00:04:34Atlanta!
00:04:36Where is that?
00:04:38Whatever! Prepare my warplane!
00:04:40Whatever! Prepare my warplane!
00:04:42Those two are going after my fiancée.
00:04:45This is war.
00:05:02I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:05:08Thank you so much, Ellen. This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:05:13That project is worth billions. He can finally take his company public.
00:05:17But Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:05:27Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:05:32Well, three years ago...
00:05:37You saved me.
00:05:55You saved me.
00:06:00He saved me, and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:06:03I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:06:10But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:06:18So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:06:21I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:06:26But why work at the flea market? Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:06:31Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:06:37Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:06:41You seem happy being a housewife.
00:06:47Where the hell are you? Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:06:52Get home, stat. It's a big day today.
00:06:56That was...
00:06:57My mother-in-law, Carol, she judges me because she thinks I come from a lower class family.
00:07:02But she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:07:08You know, she even remembered our third year anniversary.
00:07:16Please spend more time with my son.
00:07:20Hi, I'm home. I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:07:24Finally, you're back. Now sign the divorce papers.
00:07:30Divorce papers?
00:07:33Is this some sort of misunderstanding, mom?
00:07:36God, don't call me mom again. We're ending that relationship.
00:07:42Just look at you. Dirt all over. You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:07:47You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:07:50I'm below his league?
00:07:52That's right. You are.
00:07:55Jared is signing a hundred billion dollar contract tomorrow with the Ellen Musk.
00:08:01And then his company's going public.
00:08:04That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:08:07But you? You're still just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:08:12Jared's like the king in the clouds. And you...
00:08:16You?
00:08:17You will always just be a pawn. Like dirt on our shoes.
00:08:25Dirt on your shoes? But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:08:30Ha! You're delusional. You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:08:35How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:08:40Resorting to lies. Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:08:43And who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:08:50You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:08:55Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee. Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:09:00Enough!
00:09:02Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:09:06But I am.
00:09:08Don't forget.
00:09:09Don't fight it, Angela.
00:09:11Here's 500K.
00:09:13You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:09:17Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:09:21Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:09:24I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:09:29Did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:32Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:09:35Fine.
00:09:36Here's another 200K.
00:09:39500K is too much for her already.
00:09:42She's done nothing.
00:09:44Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:09:47She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:09:50Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:09:54I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:09:58You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:10:02And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench.
00:10:06A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:10:10What a joke.
00:10:12If you actually love my son, you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:10:18And leave!
00:10:21You really think that Jared would have gotten that Mabel Plaza bid without me?
00:10:26Let alone taking the company public?
00:10:28I did my very best.
00:10:30Public?
00:10:32I did everything for you, Jared.
00:10:35Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:42It's all my work!
00:10:45Baby, we're going to be late for the auction if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:10:53You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:10:58So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:11:02She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:11:06Fine.
00:11:08I'll sign it.
00:11:10But don't regret it.
00:11:13Regret?
00:11:15You know who I am?
00:11:17Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed?
00:11:21I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:11:24Jared winning the bid on Mabel Plaza was because of my dad.
00:11:30Because he's business partners with Ellen Musk.
00:11:33It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:11:38You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:11:42Social stratum matters.
00:11:44Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:11:47And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:11:50And you really think Ellen Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:11:55Ha! You're delusional.
00:11:58Now sign the papers and scram!
00:12:04You owe me.
00:12:06You dirty bitch. You sicken me.
00:12:14You hit me.
00:12:16You hit me.
00:12:20Now sign the papers, take a check, and get the fuck out!
00:12:38I don't need your penny money.
00:12:42We're finished.
00:12:43You don't want the money? That's your loss.
00:12:46Your check is just pennies to me.
00:12:50But I would like my ring back.
00:13:01Have fun on your economy flight while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:13:08And I'm way out of your league.
00:13:16Isn't that the Winston Blue Diamond Ring?
00:13:20It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:13:24Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:13:27Something she found at the flea market.
00:13:30You're right. She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:13:33Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:13:38Oh, my dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:13:45Bigger big shot than Ellen Musk?
00:13:48Yeah. And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:13:53Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:13:56Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:14:02Vanderbilt?
00:14:04Yeah. He's actually CEO of OneBank.
00:14:07I'm so sorry.
00:14:09I'm sorry.
00:14:11I'm so sorry.
00:14:13I'm sorry.
00:14:15I'm so sorry.
00:14:17I'm sorry.
00:14:19I'm sorry.
00:14:21I'm sorry.
00:14:23I'm sorry.
00:14:25She's actually one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:14:28Okay. I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:14:31You're still going to the summit tomorrow? You and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:14:34That's exactly why I'm going.
00:14:55Angela Lockhart, I finally found you.
00:15:02Who is he?
00:15:04That, that's Devin Sterling.
00:15:07He's number one on Forbes 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:15:14Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:15:16And he's your fiancé.
00:15:19What? What? My fiancé?
00:15:23The one and only.
00:15:26So, after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet?
00:15:34Babe?
00:15:43That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:49What is she doing here?
00:15:54You skank. My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:16:01Divorced?
00:16:03That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be, Mr...
00:16:09Sterling. Devin Sterling.
00:16:13So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:16Guess she's not just a forsaken woman, she's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:24How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:16:27Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:30Do you know who I am?
00:16:33They don't know who you are.
00:16:36You hide it well.
00:16:38X-Team, teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:43Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:49Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York. You forgot to bring the security team.
00:17:01Mind if I, uh, borrow your men?
00:17:04Hell yeah.
00:17:08Chelsea's ill-mannered apes out.
00:17:10Oh, you bitch. I'll have my son teach you a real lesson.
00:17:20A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:24No.
00:17:27Uh, guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:31You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money, like me.
00:17:36Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:39Pleased to meet you all. Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution. What an honor.
00:17:45I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:17:48It's worth billions of dollars.
00:17:50Congrats. You owe me nothing.
00:17:53It's worth billions of dollars. Congrats. You owe me nothing.
00:17:57Thank you. But we haven't received the contract yet. We deserve it.
00:18:01Oh, that's nothing. I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:18:04Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:18:07So, I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:18:11Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:18:13Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:18:17Yes. I heard they're a very important and powerful gang.
00:18:22Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:18:25Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:18:34I'll do my best.
00:18:40Excuse me, second gentleman.
00:18:42What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:47How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:50Me? A hobo? How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:18:55You sleep your way in?
00:18:56I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:18:59Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:19:02Don't flatter yourself.
00:19:07This is your ex-husband?
00:19:11What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:19:13Who the hell is this? You were cheating on me?
00:19:21Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:19:24That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:19:30They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:19:51You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:19:56Get your hands off of her!
00:20:02My lady.
00:20:17My queen.
00:20:21My queen.
00:20:29It's... It's him!
00:20:32He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:20:36Who are these peasants?
00:20:38These seats are reserved for the Ellen Muskiner special guest.
00:20:43Oh, shut up, old man.
00:20:45You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:49Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:51That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:53You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:56His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:21:00This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:03Vanderbilt.
00:21:05The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:21:10who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:14That lonely Vanderbilt family?
00:21:19Oh, goddammit.
00:21:22Stomachache now?
00:21:26Whatever.
00:21:28Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:21:43How dare you call one of us lonely?
00:21:46How dare you call one of us lone?
00:21:49I'm Harvey F. N. Buffett, the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:54I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:21:59And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:22:03Not with me around.
00:22:05I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:22:10You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:14You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:22:17We've had enough of your games.
00:22:19Security! Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:23Looks like the old guard's teaming up against you.
00:22:26But don't worry. You got new money here.
00:22:31I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:33Yes, my queen.
00:22:35You're all despicable.
00:22:38An insult to your family names.
00:22:43Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:46Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:49Cut off all business ties.
00:22:52And if you don't,
00:22:54I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:22:59Ha! I knew it!
00:23:01You're here to fuck with me.
00:23:03You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:05How much money did you spend on that getup to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:09You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:13You have nothing, and you will always be nothing.
00:23:17She's a gold digger.
00:23:20Gold digger?
00:23:21Gigolo.
00:23:23Wanna try me for a night?
00:23:26Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:28Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:31They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:34Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:36She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:39Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:23:41Security!
00:23:47Security!
00:23:49You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:52And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:55You!
00:23:57Insolent fools.
00:23:59Let me guess. You're that special guest?
00:24:03I don't know.
00:24:05Throw them out!
00:24:06And not without some broken bones, too.
00:24:15Back down, Max.
00:24:20I got this.
00:24:36Whoa!
00:24:47What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:49I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:51No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:54Oh my God, we're so screwed!
00:25:06Angela!
00:25:08Don't hurt her!
00:25:09You bitch. I've always been sick of you.
00:25:11You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:13How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:25:16Boss? Did she say her boss?
00:25:18Miss Musk?
00:25:20That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:22That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:24My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:28Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:31Past the American Revolution?
00:25:33Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:35If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:38That's Lady Lockhart to you. She's royalty.
00:25:41And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:45What are you going to do?
00:25:47Kneel to me.
00:25:49Oh, your majesty.
00:25:51Welcome to the United States.
00:25:54We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:25:57Yes, your highness.
00:25:59Is it queen or prince?
00:26:01It doesn't matter.
00:26:03My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:06We didn't mean to offend.
00:26:08Hey, what are you doing, you idiot?
00:26:10Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness.
00:26:23What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:32She's a badass herself.
00:26:34He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:36You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:26:40Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:26:43No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:26:45I worked hard for everything.
00:26:47You worked for everything?
00:26:50I'm sorry.
00:26:52I'm sorry.
00:26:54I'm sorry.
00:26:56I'm sorry.
00:26:58I'm sorry.
00:27:00I'm sorry.
00:27:04Hi, honey.
00:27:06So, our 30-year anniversary is coming up,
00:27:08and I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:27:11I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:27:13I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Plozza project,
00:27:17and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:21Oh, my God.
00:27:23You were nothing before me.
00:27:30All your achievements, all your glory, that's all mine, including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:27:38I can take all of that away, just like that.
00:27:42No, you can't take that away from me.
00:27:44That's why Ellen Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:27:48Oh, and this antique wedding ring?
00:27:52Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:27:54It was Queen Victoria's, and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's
00:27:58GDP.
00:27:59Oh, I gave you back the ring?
00:28:08I divorced a royal heiress?
00:28:10No, no, please, no, no, please take me back, baby, I still love you!
00:28:20Oh, man, it looks like they've started the party without us.
00:28:23No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:28:32God, these two again.
00:28:34Did he say, is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:37President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:28:38After General Eisenhower won World War II, each of his descendants have all gone on to
00:28:43become five-star generals, the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:46Bloody buffoons know your history.
00:28:49Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:28:50I got lost trying to find Atlanta, then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:28:58And that there is, that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:03He's Dr. House's protege!
00:29:05Dr. House?
00:29:06Yes.
00:29:07I thought that was just a TV show.
00:29:08Oh, no, that's based on real figures.
00:29:10Yep, that's me, son of James House.
00:29:13Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:29:17I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just 12 years old.
00:29:20So he's been off carrying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last
00:29:2414 months.
00:29:26And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:34Hey, Ellen.
00:29:35Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:38Uh, they're all your fiancées.
00:29:41What?
00:29:42Fiancées?
00:29:45Plural?
00:29:47Watch it, nerds.
00:29:48I'm her fiancé.
00:29:49No, I'm her fiancé.
00:29:50You can both shut up.
00:29:52I'm her fiancé.
00:29:53It's you.
00:29:54It's me.
00:29:55Who the hell is he?
00:29:56I'm Spider-Man.
00:29:59How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:30:04Uh, your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because
00:30:07he decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:30:10No, she has three badass girlfriends.
00:30:14She has three badass fiancées and she marries his dumb ass.
00:30:20Whatever.
00:30:21Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:27Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:32At your service.
00:30:33Me too.
00:30:39One down, two more to go.
00:30:41She's become queen.
00:30:43Bishop to G4.
00:30:48Ow!
00:30:49Ow!
00:30:50Ow!
00:30:51What is that?
00:30:52The most German festin' water in the Nile River.
00:30:58Rook to A8.
00:31:04Hello?
00:31:07I thought I was king.
00:31:09No, you wish.
00:31:10The king doesn't do anything.
00:31:13Alan can be my king.
00:31:14Oh, fine.
00:31:19Bankrupt to four.
00:31:20It's right this second.
00:31:26I...
00:31:28I've been bankrupt!
00:31:29No!
00:31:31Rook to A8.
00:31:38I've been bankrupt!
00:31:39No!
00:31:41I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:45Well, guess what?
00:31:46Game over.
00:31:47Alright, boys.
00:31:49Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:51Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:53I'm right with you.
00:31:56Wait for me!
00:31:57Nobody beats me to the finish line!
00:32:08Angela!
00:32:10You already have three fiancés?
00:32:13You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:32:15I...
00:32:17want compensation.
00:32:20You greedy SOB.
00:32:22Who the fuck is that?
00:32:23My ex-husband.
00:32:25Wait.
00:32:26You were married?
00:32:27Yeah.
00:32:28And if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:32More for me.
00:32:33No, no.
00:32:34Of course not.
00:32:35Just...
00:32:36Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:38Don't steal my joke.
00:32:39I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:32:41All the evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:32:45What?
00:32:46Is there something on my face?
00:32:47Uh, yeah.
00:32:48Murderous intent.
00:32:50Let's remarry.
00:32:52Let's remarry.
00:32:54You still don't realize.
00:32:57I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:33:08What?
00:33:27Sir, it's an emergency.
00:33:29We need to wreck right away.
00:33:30Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:35Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:37Hey.
00:33:39She should be okay now.
00:33:44Hey, you!
00:33:46Watch over here.
00:33:47I'll be right back.
00:33:56You saved me.
00:34:00Fuck.
00:34:01I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:05Fuck.
00:34:07I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:09You've cheated on me.
00:34:10You've hit me.
00:34:12And you've insulted me.
00:34:14And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:18I fucking hate you.
00:34:20Lady Lockhart.
00:34:22What?
00:34:23What now?
00:34:25Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person.
00:34:29But if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:34:33How about us three?
00:34:35Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:39Yeah, no.
00:34:40You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:44This is your fault, you doofus.
00:34:45We never should have believed your bullshit.
00:34:48No.
00:34:50We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockharts.
00:34:55Help me.
00:34:57I'll get you for this.
00:35:05I never should have listened to you.
00:35:06I'm ruined because of you.
00:35:22So, what's the situation here?
00:35:24I want to marry you.
00:35:26I want to marry you.
00:35:34I want to marry you.
00:35:37Listen.
00:35:39I only met you guys a few hours ago.
00:35:41And I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:44What?
00:35:45What if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:51Much longer.
00:35:53Angela?
00:35:54Your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:36:01My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:04Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:36:06The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:36:09Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:11I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, freeloader husband of yours.
00:36:18I can't call his name, but...
00:36:20Anyway, congratulations.
00:36:22I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:27Oh, you must pick one of them to marry.
00:36:30Otherwise...
00:36:31Let me do it.
00:36:33You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:36:36Otherwise, we'll kill ourselves.
00:36:40Mom?
00:36:41All right, honey, that's it.
00:36:43Bye.
00:36:45So, who are you going to choose?
00:36:50Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:36:56Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:37:01That seems greedy.
00:37:08But...
00:37:09But...
00:37:10But...
00:37:11But...
00:37:12But...
00:37:14But...
00:37:15I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:19Hey, I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:37:23I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:37:27Well, okay.
00:37:29No murder, please, I was just kidding.
00:37:33You have seven days to win her over.
00:37:36Ooh, it's like The Bachelorette.
00:37:39I know.
00:37:40We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:43Welcome to the show, the three badasses who want me.
00:37:47Today, we have our first challenge.
00:37:52What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:55You'll see.
00:38:05Oh my god, oh my god, cockroaches!
00:38:07All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:38:10And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman
00:38:13from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:15What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love
00:38:19for our single, butt-screaming-her-head-off heiress?
00:38:31Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:33It's up to the final two.
00:38:41Oh my god.
00:38:58Crunchy.
00:39:00That is sick, Cole.
00:39:02Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield,
00:39:04you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:39:07There are two more left.
00:39:08Want to try one?
00:39:09Oh my god, no, no.
00:39:13Oh my god, save me.
00:39:14Save you? You're going to save me!
00:39:19I'm a German folk doctor.
00:39:21These hands can't get germs on them.
00:39:23They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:39:36Woo!
00:39:41Thank god you're here.
00:39:45Are you alright, honey?
00:39:47Angela!
00:39:51Alright, you won the first challenge, so your reward,
00:39:54you get to watch over her for the night.
00:39:57Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:39:59I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:40:01You have nothing to worry about.
00:40:07Honestly, even if you guys fuck,
00:40:09it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:40:11At least my girl can get some.
00:40:13I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:40:17The cockroaches.
00:40:18They're gone, they're gone.
00:40:20There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:40:23I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:40:31I need a drink.
00:40:37Whoa, easy! You're on an empty stomach.
00:40:40Oh, why do you care?
00:40:43Are you trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela?
00:40:47You guys were right.
00:40:49I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:40:53You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:40:59He never even loved me.
00:41:01And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:05Do you really think that you would still be number one
00:41:07on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:41:13You may not be number one on the Forbes list,
00:41:15but you know what you're number one in?
00:41:18What?
00:41:22You're number one here.
00:41:25You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:41:29Lies.
00:41:32You all just want something from me.
00:41:39Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:45But I'm not going to let you down.
00:41:48I'm not going to let you down.
00:41:50I'm not going to let you down.
00:41:52I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:54But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:42:01I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:42:03I don't need your power, your status, your wealth,
00:42:07your connections.
00:42:10I just need you.
00:42:14I'll prove my love to you within six days, I promise.
00:42:22Okay.
00:42:28Screw the contest. I just want love.
00:42:33Angela, you're drunk.
00:42:36I'm an adult. Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:42:40Okay.
00:42:45But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:42:49Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:43:01If this is what you want.
00:43:199-inch penis.
00:43:21Morning to you too.
00:43:24You sure you were drunk last night? You wouldn't...
00:43:26A girl remembers when she's had a 9-inch penis inside of her.
00:43:32Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:43:35But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:39Because I'm not going to tell them.
00:43:41I'm not going to tell them.
00:43:43I'm not going to tell them.
00:43:45Tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:47Because then they would...
00:43:49Say that you were being unfair?
00:43:51Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:54I won the first challenge, and according to Ellen,
00:43:57my prize was to spend a night with you anyways.
00:44:01Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:44:07You sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:44:11Stop.
00:44:13Fine, fine, fine.
00:44:17I won't tell.
00:44:19But only on one condition.
00:44:23I won't tell.
00:44:25But only on one condition.
00:44:28You have to go out on a date with me.
00:44:31Fine.
00:44:35I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:44:39You never noticed me.
00:44:43No.
00:44:46You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:44:52It's only 7am. She's still sleeping.
00:44:54I'm not sleeping alone.
00:44:55Yeah, I'm not letting my fiancé be alone with another man for another second.
00:45:02Morning, gentlemen.
00:45:03Oh, or shall I say roughmen?
00:45:05Oh, don't mind him.
00:45:08What's up, guys?
00:45:09We're ready for the second challenge.
00:45:12No cockroaches this time.
00:45:14Yes, no more terrifying things. That was my bad, Angela.
00:45:17This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:45:19I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:45:21The second challenge is...
00:45:24The second challenge is...
00:45:26a date.
00:45:27Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:45:29A date?
00:45:31That's it.
00:45:32What's the catch?
00:45:33No catch.
00:45:34Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:45:37As simple as that.
00:45:38I know what I want to do. Let's start with me first.
00:45:40Alright, who's up first? Ben?
00:45:42Me.
00:45:43Saved the best for last.
00:45:45Ain't that right, Angela?
00:45:47Then it's decided.
00:45:51Please don't take my BMW away!
00:45:54Too bad. You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:45:58I have nothing left!
00:46:02It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:07It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:17General Eisenhower, sir!
00:46:19At ease, Lieutenant!
00:46:20This is my lieutenant. He also manages this boxing gym.
00:46:23Pleasure to meet you, Madam.
00:46:25I'm Ben.
00:46:26Nice to meet you, sir.
00:46:28This is my lieutenant. He also manages this boxing gym.
00:46:30Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:46:32He's so serious. But hang on.
00:46:35Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:46:38Baby, I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns.
00:46:43Guns? Like murder weapons?
00:46:46Yes. Murder weapons.
00:46:59You like my guns, babe?
00:47:01Pretty rock hard.
00:47:02Yeah.
00:47:04Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:47:06Lieutenant! Come close!
00:47:09Wait! You're just going to hit him like that? He's not even going to fight back?
00:47:13Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:47:15Treason? You guys are way too serious.
00:47:18Lieutenant!
00:47:20Lieutenant!
00:47:22Lieutenant!
00:47:24Lieutenant!
00:47:27Look, you rock hard bitch! I caught you!
00:47:29If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:47:32Lieutenant, here's your attack!
00:47:47You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:47:51I will make you pay!
00:47:54You don't need to keep beating him up. We could just take him to the cops.
00:47:58Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:48:06Zoe's a bit violent. Some might call it being protective.
00:48:10Poor anger issues. What if we get married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something?
00:48:16Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:48:19Hey, some girls are into that.
00:48:21I don't know if I am.
00:48:24Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:48:29Your date with Shane starts now.
00:48:34Hey.
00:48:36Hey.
00:48:37Cool ride.
00:48:39A gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife.
00:48:42Impressive.
00:48:46Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:48:49Refreshing.
00:48:51I got cool mint, too.
00:48:53Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:48:56What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:48:59Fruit flavored gum. Can't stand those.
00:49:02So, where are you taking me tonight?
00:49:04Let me show you.
00:49:12Dr. Wilson!
00:49:14Our VIP of VIPs!
00:49:16Right this way.
00:49:18VIP of VIPs?
00:49:20Ah, just some other guy I saved. I forget who.
00:49:23You saved a lot of people.
00:49:25I do what I can.
00:49:27Oh my gosh.
00:49:29It's my gold-digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband.
00:49:34Sandra Miller, what are you doing here? I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:49:39Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:49:46Hello, of you.
00:49:48What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:49:50Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:49:52I sell high-fashion jewelry pieces so high-end, you couldn't even afford even a few soldier organs.
00:49:59The auction begins.
00:50:01I'll deal with you later.
00:50:10Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:50:15Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:50:19Cleopatra's armband.
00:50:21Sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller, for five million dollars.
00:50:28Excuse me, I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:32It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:35I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:37It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:39What are you doing?
00:50:41Just watch.
00:50:43Come on.
00:50:48That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:50:50Please, I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:50:53She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:50:56You work at a flea market?
00:50:58Not this again.
00:50:59Cut the bullshit, that wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:51:02Oh yeah? Here, you want it? For free.
00:51:05Ew, I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:51:10Well, that's too bad then.
00:51:12Because you are the fraud.
00:51:16What are you talking about?
00:51:17Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:51:19Throw them out.
00:51:21Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine,
00:51:24but we're professionals.
00:51:26Oh yeah?
00:51:27And that armband sells for five million dollars?
00:51:31Yeah.
00:51:32Mine is the real thing.
00:51:33You two are just upset because you're too poor
00:51:36to afford our luxury items.
00:51:38Why is that so?
00:51:39What if a so-called expert fell to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:51:43Dear Lord, this is real.
00:51:48It's authentic. It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:55Karen, what have you found?
00:51:57Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me?
00:52:00It's a replica.
00:52:03They had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:52:06So, you are the fraud.
00:52:10So you just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes.
00:52:14And Cameron, how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:52:17150.
00:52:19Wow. Not even five dollars. Sandra.
00:52:23You've been duping us the whole time?
00:52:26Arrest her!
00:52:28No! Please! Just this one time! Please!
00:52:32What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:52:34Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the Emperor of Japan. Bye.
00:52:39A lackluster from the jewelry industry forever.
00:52:50I had a really great time tonight.
00:52:53Me too. May I have a kiss?
00:53:04No.
00:53:12Something wrong?
00:53:14Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:53:21Yep. You never have to worry about stinky breath from me.
00:53:34You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:53:38I don't have any money.
00:53:40How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:43I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg.
00:53:49Stop!
00:53:54Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:53:58Mr. Buffett.
00:54:01This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:54:05That's right. Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:54:09I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:54:12I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:54:14No, no. Sorry about those injuries from earlier. It was all just a little misunderstanding.
00:54:20Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:54:23And then maybe you can tell Lady Lockhart to put in a good word for us?
00:54:29Angela still loves me. She's just throwing a fit.
00:54:32She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:54:34Yeah. Do you need any help winning her back?
00:54:37We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:54:39I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago, and now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:54:45It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:54:48Sure. I'll put in a good word for you.
00:54:52I just need...
00:54:53Anything. You tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:54:56If I take everything from these idiots, I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge.
00:55:08I'm giving the contract to Jared Cooper, just like you asked me to.
00:55:11Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:15Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:17I don't get it, Miss Musk.
00:55:19That contract has a preliminary clause. It requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front of the deposit.
00:55:25And if he can't, then what?
00:55:27He'll be bankrupt.
00:55:28So as long as he's greedy, I have to take it.
00:55:32I'm avenging my best friend.
00:55:34I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart, he's nothing.
00:55:44I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:47We should celebrate.
00:55:49You did?
00:55:50You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:55:52That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:55:56And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:55:59Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:56:04What?
00:56:06You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:56:08Oh, no, no, no, no. He's not.
00:56:10Jared, what are you doing?
00:56:12You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:56:16It's my decision, Mom. I'm the head of the house here.
00:56:20I'm telling my dad.
00:56:21Fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:56:24If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as his side piece.
00:56:27But if not, you can scram.
00:56:30Dad.
00:56:31Jared is being mean to me. Teach him a lesson.
00:56:34Kaylee, be a good girl, okay?
00:56:36Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:56:40Don't get on his bad side.
00:56:42We can't afford to piss him off.
00:56:44So do as he says.
00:56:46But, Dad.
00:56:52I'm sorry.
00:56:54For your side piece.
00:56:56Very good. I'm happy you've come around.
00:56:59Now, let's go celebrate.
00:57:03I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:57:08But that tongue action, though.
00:57:10Tongue is important in more than just one spot.
00:57:13Ellen, we are in public.
00:57:14It's true.
00:57:16Stomachache.
00:57:18Again?
00:57:19Stomachache.
00:57:20Again?
00:57:21I have to run to the bathroom.
00:57:22Devin should be here to pick you up soon.
00:57:24Okay.
00:57:26Devin's late.
00:57:28Not a good sign for a date.
00:57:32This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:57:37It's her.
00:57:38And she's alone.
00:57:39With no one to save her.
00:57:43You whore.
00:57:44You seduced my son so he'd get back with you.
00:57:50Let me tell you.
00:57:52I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:58:00Hey, you guys can fight all you want.
00:58:01You can take this somewhere else.
00:58:03Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:58:06What? Why do I have to leave?
00:58:08She's the one starting shit.
00:58:09Because I have money and you don't.
00:58:12You're just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:58:14And my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract.
00:58:19He still got the contract?
00:58:21Hmm.
00:58:22Must be Ellen's doing.
00:58:24Even if he does sign it, he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:58:28Oh, he's just gonna...
00:58:30Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:34Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:39You take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own.
00:58:44My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
00:58:47$1,000 to take her away.
00:58:50$2,000 to drag her away.
00:58:53$5,000 to beat her away.
00:58:59Oh! Oh! Hey! Hey!
00:59:01Ow! Hey!
00:59:05You okay?
00:59:06Are you hurt?
00:59:11Weakling.
00:59:12You!
00:59:13You, just a few days ago, you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced.
00:59:17And now you have two more?
00:59:19What a whore.
00:59:21What a whore.
00:59:22Yeah.
00:59:23And Jared wanted to get back with her?
00:59:25What if she has an STD?
00:59:27Oh, like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD.
00:59:31Let's go.
00:59:32We'll expose her to Jared.
00:59:34Hang on.
00:59:37What do you want?
00:59:38I'll scream!
00:59:39I don't hit women.
00:59:40But I never said I don't kill women.
00:59:43But I never said I don't kill women.
00:59:46Oh, God.
00:59:47He is a murderer.
00:59:48What if he murders me?
00:59:50Not him. Definitely not him.
00:59:56We're not afraid of you.
00:59:58That's enough.
00:59:59This isn't a war zone.
01:00:01You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
01:00:05I was just messing with them.
01:00:07Was he, though?
01:00:08We're not afraid of you.
01:00:10Jared!
01:00:11You have to avenge us.
01:00:12Look at this slut.
01:00:13She's found two more boy toys.
01:00:15She's cheating on you.
01:00:16Don't get back with her.
01:00:17Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you.
01:00:19I apologize for this scene.
01:00:21I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
01:00:25Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:27Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:29The potty crashes.
01:00:33Oh!
01:00:34You have any idea who that is?
01:00:36That's my son.
01:00:37Oh!
01:00:38You have any idea who that is?
01:00:40That's my wife.
01:00:41We saved that title for the real skank over there.
01:00:44That's right.
01:00:45Know your place.
01:00:46Shut up.
01:00:47She's cheating on you.
01:00:51Know your place.
01:00:52You're just a side piece.
01:00:53If I still want you, that is.
01:00:55Eric, have you gone mad?
01:00:57This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:00:59You slap her for this whore?
01:01:01Mom!
01:01:02They really think they're something, huh?
01:01:04Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:01:08She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:01:11I only got the Maple Closet Project because she gave it to me.
01:01:15What?
01:01:17You apologize right now or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:01:27I'm sorry.
01:01:29No.
01:01:30This can't be.
01:01:32I made you a divorce.
01:01:37Go home.
01:01:38You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:01:46I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:01:49Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:01:53I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:01:56I didn't come here for you.
01:01:59I'm on a date.
01:02:01A date with two men at the same time?
01:02:04She really is a whore.
01:02:06Angela, please forgive me.
01:02:08I really do love you.
01:02:12Oh-ho! Lady Knockout is here!
01:02:16Oh-ho! Lady Knockout is here!
01:02:20Yeah, we already know you beat Ford's ass.
01:02:24We're too old for that.
01:02:26They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:02:28Please, you gave me the contract.
01:02:30So if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:02:34Oh, yes, please, Miss Lockhart, join us.
01:02:36We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:02:40What the hell are you all doing here?
01:02:42Where were you?
01:02:44Stomach issues.
01:02:46Again?
01:02:47Would you like my diagnosis?
01:02:49No.
01:02:51Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:02:55I would rather die than be with you again.
01:02:59Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:03:03I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:03:05Otherwise, they'll cut me off, too.
01:03:07Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance.
01:03:09I'll prove it to you.
01:03:11You want a chance?
01:03:13Angela, no.
01:03:14You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:03:17Don't take him back.
01:03:19I'll give you two choices.
01:03:22I'll give you two choices.
01:03:26Me or the contract.
01:03:29You're kidding me.
01:03:31No, I'm not kidding you.
01:03:33If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:03:37But you don't get the $100 billion contract.
01:03:41The choice is all yours.
01:03:43That's a tough choice.
01:03:45You think so?
01:03:47He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:03:50Either way, he benefits.
01:03:52Why can't I have both?
01:03:54You really are a greedy bastard.
01:03:57Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember?
01:03:59I deserve the contract.
01:04:01Did you really?
01:04:07Look who's fashionably late now.
01:04:09He didn't save her at the pool.
01:04:11Wait, what are you talking about?
01:04:14I choose the contract.
01:04:17I knew it.
01:04:19You'll get what's coming to you.
01:04:21With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:04:26Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:04:29I will get you one day.
01:04:31Let me show you something.
01:04:44You saved me.
01:04:50You saved me.
01:04:52I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:04:58But I promise you, I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:05:04No, no, I wasn't lying.
01:05:06I just couldn't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:05:11Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:05:15What? Me?
01:05:17Dr. Wilson losing at saving people?
01:05:20No way.
01:05:22You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:05:26You're crazy.
01:05:28And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:05:33What?
01:05:35They've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:05:38What?
01:05:41Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:05:44Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:05:48Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:05:51I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:05:54Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry.
01:05:56I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:05:59No, it's not your fault. They're just too slick.
01:06:02You'd like me to punish them if we're lucky.
01:06:04Oh God, no. Not that again. Please.
01:06:07Max, you know what to do.
01:06:23The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:06:25All business ties have been severed.
01:06:27We're bankrupt!
01:06:33How did you do that?
01:06:35Who are you? And don't say Spider-Man!
01:06:40I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:43I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:47I am...
01:06:49Crypto Punk Number Two!
01:06:51What did he say he was?
01:06:53That's more bizarre than Spider-Man.
01:06:56You're Crypto Punk Number Two?
01:06:58Well, I'm Crypto Punk Number One.
01:07:01See? You are Number One at something.
01:07:03The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:07:06Forget Forbes' list.
01:07:08It's all about young money now.
01:07:10So, how about our date?
01:07:18I'm not letting him one-up me on this one.
01:07:20Let's buy two.
01:07:32They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:07:35I still have the $100 billion project.
01:07:38Yes! I'm rich!
01:07:41They'll make them all pay soon!
01:07:50What?
01:07:51Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:07:52The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:07:56Otherwise, it's a breach of contract.
01:07:58No!
01:08:00I'm bankrupt!
01:08:02I need a little law card.
01:08:04You tricked me!
01:08:10Oh, allow me.
01:08:14I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:08:16I had to get some very important materials...
01:08:20for our special date.
01:08:22What?
01:08:24I had to get some very important materials...
01:08:27for our special date.
01:08:29Well, cheers.
01:08:31Cheers.
01:08:40This looks good.
01:08:46Did you use my spices?
01:08:49I know your ex-in-law has never appreciated you.
01:08:54You can have all the money and power in the world...
01:08:56and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:09:01I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:09:07Angela...
01:09:09your future...
01:09:11with me...
01:09:13is gonna be different.
01:09:15Come on.
01:09:17Upstairs.
01:09:25Come on.
01:09:36Wow.
01:09:38Devon, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on...
01:09:41these past few years...
01:09:43just because of some silly mistake.
01:09:46Angela...
01:09:48I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:09:50Actually...
01:09:52I've also loved you for three years.
01:09:54That's right.
01:09:56I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:09:58How is all of this possible?
01:10:01I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:10:04Well, actually...
01:10:06maybe Devon, but...
01:10:09I've had a crush on you since college.
01:10:12You were my motivation to go to business school.
01:10:16Despite who you were...
01:10:18you never judged me for being poor.
01:10:22Are you trying to get hired...
01:10:24at Fortune 500...
01:10:26in a suit like that?
01:10:30All you do is babble on and on...
01:10:32about Internet money...
01:10:34Bitcoin and shit like that.
01:10:38Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:10:42I'll teach you a lesson.
01:10:45Hey! Get away from him!
01:10:47Angela!
01:10:495C girl.
01:10:51I like her.
01:11:02How is he?
01:11:04It's a rare poison...
01:11:05made from a mixture of dried roots...
01:11:07found in Africa.
01:11:09Can he be cured?
01:11:11I actually think I know that poison.
01:11:13It sounds really scary...
01:11:15but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:11:17Household salt.
01:11:22I love you.
01:11:26I like her.
01:11:28There you go.
01:11:31What time is it now?
01:11:34Oh, shoot. I'm late for swim practice.
01:11:43I like her.
01:11:45We have been rivals ever since.
01:11:47So, that's how I...
01:11:50Well, we...
01:11:52all met.
01:11:53I barely remember.
01:11:55I should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:11:57Matthew Richards...
01:11:59the guy who poisoned me...
01:12:01attacked you out of revenge.
01:12:02You wouldn't have known.
01:12:04I did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:12:06If that makes you feel any better.
01:12:08Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:12:10Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:12:13Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years...
01:12:17who will you pick?
01:12:21How can that be?
01:12:23Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:12:30Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:12:34Bankrupt?
01:12:36The Vanderbilt's have gone bankrupt?
01:12:39Well then, get out of here!
01:12:41You can't do this to me!
01:12:46Jared!
01:12:47Mom, it's me.
01:12:48Jared!
01:12:49Mom, it's me.
01:12:50What happened?
01:12:52Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:12:55Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:12:57You should get back with your wife!
01:12:59We're bankrupt.
01:13:00What?
01:13:05Jared Cooper.
01:13:08We're here to repost your belongings.
01:13:12No one is going to save you now.
01:13:14Mom!
01:13:17Mom!
01:13:19What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:13:25Who will you pick?
01:13:29I...
01:13:35I brought you fried chicken.
01:13:36Fried chicken?
01:13:37Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:13:40Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:13:43Sucking up last minute!
01:13:45At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:13:47Hey, stop. Stop.
01:13:51Welcome back to The Bachelorette.
01:13:53I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:13:57I mean, Angela Lockhart...
01:14:00You know what I mean.
01:14:01Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:14:05which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:14:09Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:14:13Or Joel, the general?
01:14:17Or Devin, the CEO?
01:14:23Looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:14:27Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:14:30But when she does, she will take this eternal rose
01:14:33made from glass imported from Venice
01:14:36and give it to our winner.
01:14:38Angela.
01:14:41Angela.
01:14:42Oh, I...
01:14:46I need more time to think.
01:14:51While our bachelorette takes a little time to decide,
01:14:55why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:14:58Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:15:01Let's start with Cole.
01:15:03Cole.
01:15:07There's not much to say.
01:15:09Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:15:11who has huge biceps,
01:15:13a massive chest,
01:15:16who would protect a wife?
01:15:20Okay, thank you.
01:15:22Uh, Shane?
01:15:25Muscles, money,
01:15:28they won't get you so far.
01:15:30But you need a well-balanced man like me
01:15:32that has more than one way to keep a lady happy,
01:15:35if you know what I mean.
01:15:38Okay, I think we do.
01:15:40And Devin.
01:15:43That was quite disgusting.
01:15:47I just hope Angela's okay.
01:15:49I know she's going under a lot of stress right now,
01:15:52a lot of choices to make.
01:15:54And she's my queen.
01:15:56I just really hope she's okay.
01:15:58Now, one more thing.
01:16:00What kind of a doctor
01:16:02brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:16:04That's a good point.
01:16:06That's a good point.
01:16:07Fat for her heart.
01:16:10And then you.
01:16:11What?
01:16:12You know what they say about military men.
01:16:15They beat their wives.
01:16:21Enough.
01:16:23Stand up.
01:16:26Hey, you guys.
01:16:28Whoa, break it up.
01:16:30Hey, break it up.
01:16:36Cut to commercial.
01:16:38Cut to commercial.
01:16:57This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make
01:16:59in my entire life.
01:17:02Who do I choose?
01:17:07Angela.
01:17:11Angela's marrying me.
01:17:12You're not stealing her from me.
01:17:14Oh, yeah?
01:17:16I may be a doctor, but like I said,
01:17:18I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:17:24What don't you have in that cup?
01:17:26Fruit flavored gum.
01:17:27I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:17:29I'll fight you to the death.
01:17:31Don't forget about me.
01:17:33It's time I reveal my truth.
01:17:35Identity.
01:17:38These stupid profile cards don't make any sense.
01:17:41They do not help.
01:17:43Who made these?
01:17:45It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:18:03It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:18:08I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:18:11And I have the power of telekinesis.
01:18:16Go!
01:18:29We may have to work together to take him down.
01:18:33This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:18:37I may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up.
01:18:41Hmm.
01:18:42Winter Mint or Cool Mint?
01:18:49You know,
01:18:51I've always really liked your hair.
01:18:53Really?
01:18:54Yeah.
01:18:55It's so cool.
01:18:57You know,
01:18:59I've always really liked your hair.
01:19:01Really?
01:19:03I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:19:06So I appreciate that.
01:19:09Hey, hey, hey.
01:19:10And you know,
01:19:11Cool,
01:19:12I've always really liked the way you talk.
01:19:15Really?
01:19:16Yeah.
01:19:19What do you got for me?
01:19:21I always really like the way you chew gum.
01:19:24Yeah?
01:19:25Yeah.
01:19:26It's fresh, right?
01:19:27Yeah.
01:19:28Yeah, yeah.
01:19:30You're actually a really good doctor.
01:19:32I appreciate it.
01:19:33You need me to look at you?
01:19:35I got you.
01:19:36I'll take care of you.
01:19:37Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:39Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:41It was Jerry Cooper.
01:19:43That fucker!
01:19:45We have to find her.
01:19:46What, how?
01:19:47Her ring.
01:19:48Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case.
01:19:51Well, let's go then.
01:19:53My fiancée!
01:19:54My fiancée!
01:20:01Jared.
01:20:05What am I doing here?
01:20:08You destroyed me.
01:20:11And you took everything.
01:20:14What?
01:20:15Out of nothing left.
01:20:17It's not my fault you were too greedy.
01:20:20I wasn't greedy to have sex with my wife.
01:20:24What?
01:20:25I'm not your wife anymore!
01:20:27I know.
01:20:28You wouldn't take me back now, not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:20:31This is illegal.
01:20:32You wouldn't want your child to be away from its father.
01:20:35You won't have me arrested.
01:20:37You will take me back.
01:20:41Come on, bitch.
01:20:44I'll settle you down a little.
01:20:47Shh.
01:20:54You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:20:58Hey!
01:21:00Angela, come here!
01:21:05You're too late!
01:21:06I drugged her.
01:21:07She'll be dead soon unless...
01:21:09Not yet.
01:21:10Have you forgotten who I am?
01:21:12He really does have everything in his coat.
01:21:14Everything except for...
01:21:15Yeah, except for fruit-flavored gum.
01:21:16Get it already.
01:21:17Just save my balls!
01:21:20Here you go.
01:21:26You're all good now.
01:21:28Oh, thank God.
01:21:30But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:21:32What?
01:21:33What are you going to do to me?
01:21:35Hey, stop!
01:21:36No, don't!
01:21:38Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:21:42No!
01:21:46Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:21:48Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:21:56So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:21:58We've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding.
01:22:01The Prince of Bhutan.
01:22:03And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:22:12Welcome back to the finale of
01:22:14The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:16We're down to the wire.
01:22:18Literally.
01:22:19The wedding day.
01:22:20But who's the groom?
01:22:34Welcome back to the finale of
01:22:36The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:38But who's the groom?
01:22:42Ah, seems our heiress still hasn't decided.
01:22:46Any input from the parents?
01:22:49Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:22:52This is exciting.
01:22:54Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:57Let me think.
01:23:01I like the doctor.
01:23:03He's cute.
01:23:06But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:23:10And we can't forget about Devin Sterling,
01:23:12the one who's loved her the longest.
01:23:14Isn't that right, Devin?
01:23:16Angela.
01:23:23You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:23:28And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:23:32But this was a really hard decision.
01:23:36And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:42And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:50I'm just kidding.
01:23:51I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:23:57Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:24:01I mean, bachelorette, once.
01:24:03They've all proven their undying love.
01:24:06So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:24:09Literally.
01:24:12Could it be the sexy and protective,
01:24:15general with a temper,
01:24:17Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:24:23Or the fun, wicked-minded,
01:24:26but kind of weird,
01:24:28Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:24:33And last but not least,
01:24:35could it be the richest man of them all,
01:24:38the man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:24:40Mr. Devin Sterling?
01:24:45Gentlemen,
01:24:47it's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:24:49It has.
01:24:50May the best man win.
01:24:52May the best man win.
01:24:55Drum roll, please.
01:25:03Never gonna let you down.
01:25:06Never gonna run around and desert you.
01:25:10Seriously, Ricky?
01:25:18I choose...
01:25:29I need a powerful, strong man
01:25:31who makes me feel like he can protect me.
01:25:35Who could resist those guns?
01:25:40Should I interest you in an N.F.D., Ellen?
01:25:42Yeah, would you like a full-body checkup?
01:25:57Shane, it's you.
01:25:59I'm lovesick for you.
01:26:01You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:26:03Yeah.
01:26:06It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:26:09Ellen, be my new queen.
01:26:11I hope we can build together.
01:26:25It's always been you.
01:26:30I love you.
01:26:35I'll always love you.
01:26:39Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:26:42Ellen, would you like a full-body checkup?
01:26:44Have you seen my murder weapon?
01:26:46I need fruit-flavored gum for you.

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