An American playwright living in Rome consults a quack psychiatrist to combat his fears of balding and save his failing marriage.
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00:00:30If you'll open up your soul and let my love come in
00:00:57If you'll spread your lovely arms, the sky will start to spin
00:01:03Yeah, aren't you feeling a great big vibration
00:01:08And a warm flow of anticipation
00:01:12With a thought of sensation
00:01:15You know that in the end you'll get it
00:01:22So groove into it, yeah
00:01:25Just let yourself groove into it
00:01:29Come on, move into it, yeah
00:01:32Be free and you'll groove into it
00:01:36I wanna move and groove and move and groove and move
00:01:41And fill you with my love
00:01:47Yeah, let the soft sand of a beach
00:01:52Fall warm upon your skin
00:01:56Let the juices of a peach
00:02:00Go running down your chin
00:02:04Let's go diving in Pussycat Mountains
00:02:08Let's go climbing in Pussycat Mountains
00:02:12Smoke the fires by the way
00:02:15Let's touch the sun
00:02:19So groove into it, yeah
00:02:23Be free and just groove into it
00:02:26Come on, move into it, yeah
00:02:30You'll see you'll groove into it
00:02:34I wanna move and groove and move and groove and move
00:02:41I wanna move and groove and move and move
00:02:47Yeah, you'll see you'll groove into it
00:02:51Rome, the Eternal City
00:02:55The Colosseum, a monument to Julius Caesar
00:03:00The Trevi Fountain, a monument to Pope Alexander
00:03:07Piazza Navona, a monument to the great Bernini
00:03:13St. Peter's, a monument to God
00:03:20The Traffic Jam, a monument to Henry Ford
00:03:29Fred Dobbs, he's more worried about losing his hair than losing his wife
00:03:35Right now he's late to his appointment with his scalp therapist, this man
00:03:41Anna, my dear, may I see you a moment?
00:03:49His name is Dr. Farquhar
00:03:52He has no degree, that's his name
00:03:55Like yours is Irving, he's his doctor
00:04:00Meet Anna, the doctor's wife
00:04:05Few of us are happily married, but this is ridiculous
00:04:35No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
00:04:52No, no, no, no, no, no
00:04:55Anna, come on
00:04:57I'm losing my hair, I don't know
00:04:59Don't worry about your hair
00:05:01Now, just tell me about all those girls, eh?
00:05:06Dr. Farquart is interested in Fred's sex life because he gets none of his own.
00:05:12Having met his wife, you can understand why.
00:05:15Who said anything about girls?
00:05:17I did, just now.
00:05:19Didn't you hear me?
00:05:20What's the matter? You losing your hearing, too?
00:05:23Too? Then I am losing my hearing.
00:05:25Even?
00:05:26I speak!
00:05:27But so long as these two hands, God bless them, keep their skill,
00:05:34you'll have a little something left to come.
00:05:37This clown really believes he's a scalp therapist.
00:05:41The sad thing is his patients believe it, too.
00:05:44I just couldn't stand being bald.
00:05:48Who could? It's disgusting.
00:05:51All that empty space gleaming up at everybody like an undiapered baby.
00:05:55Oh, it's obscene.
00:05:56No more so than your dream about being shipwrecked on that desert island.
00:06:00Just you and that male gorilla.
00:06:08Low pain threshold, eh?
00:06:10You must have been pretty scared of that gorilla.
00:06:13Terrified.
00:06:14That's perfectly normal.
00:06:18Who the hell he was? He fell in love with me.
00:06:21I love you.
00:06:25I ran.
00:06:26Oh, masculine protest, eh?
00:06:28Then why can't you run from those girls?
00:06:30It's not the same thing.
00:06:33You're right.
00:06:35You're right. You're right.
00:06:38I can't say no.
00:06:41My darling wife, for example.
00:06:43To whom you're criminally unfaithful.
00:06:45My mistress Ornella.
00:06:47With whom you've had your way, as the old books put it.
00:06:50And some of those old books put it rather well.
00:06:53I bet you underlined all the hot passages.
00:06:56You sex clot.
00:06:58It's like a disease.
00:06:59You run this wild, you pussycat.
00:07:01What?
00:07:02Gwendoline.
00:07:03Gwendoline.
00:07:04I hate to tell you about Gwendoline.
00:07:06What hate?
00:07:07It's the least you can do while I stand here trying to save your morally exhausted hair.
00:07:13I am most grateful.
00:07:15As well you should be.
00:07:17Without me, you'd be a melon with eyes.
00:07:20Now tell me about this Gwendoline.
00:07:23I couldn't say no to Gwen.
00:07:25She was cold, unattainable, the absolute end.
00:07:27Wow, a real pageant.
00:07:29Go, we were alone together.
00:07:31By accident.
00:07:33Gwen.
00:07:36I don't care if I am your wife, sister.
00:07:38It's more erotic this way.
00:07:40Right.
00:07:41If it happens, it happens, pussycat.
00:07:44Let nature take its course.
00:07:46Right.
00:07:47I dig nature.
00:07:48Right.
00:07:49It's beautiful, I dig nature.
00:07:51Start digging.
00:08:01My time's up.
00:08:02But time.
00:08:04Well, it is time when, scalp-wise, a scientific breakthrough is imminent.
00:08:11Easy now.
00:08:13Easy, Victor Vicarious.
00:08:15You're interested in my scalp and my women.
00:08:17Oh, don't give me that holier-than-thou attitude, Clive.
00:08:20If just once I treated your rapidly vanishing hair without checking on the distaff action,
00:08:27you'd choke with frustration.
00:08:29You'd dig reliving it.
00:08:31That's how sick you are.
00:08:35No.
00:08:36Yes.
00:08:37No.
00:08:38Yes.
00:08:39No.
00:08:40Yes.
00:08:41No.
00:08:42Yes.
00:08:43No.
00:08:44Yes.
00:08:45No.
00:08:46Yes.
00:08:47Yes.
00:08:48Yes.
00:08:49Yes.
00:08:50Cease these unmanly tears immediately...
00:08:55...or I shall be forced to lock you in the little dark room.
00:09:00Now, calm for your own good.
00:09:05Tell?
00:09:06You bet your scalp.
00:09:08It all started at the Battle of the Bulge.
00:09:11The Battle of the Bulge?
00:09:13Oh, they take men on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
00:09:15And you went on Friday.
00:09:17Well, I, uh, am normal.
00:09:43Good afternoon, ma'am.
00:09:50My name's Liz.
00:09:52I hope you enjoy your massage.
00:09:54Ugh!
00:10:02Hello.
00:10:03I don't know who you are.
00:10:05Get the hell out of here before I call the police.
00:10:08Pussycat.
00:10:09If you were going to call the police, would you be whispering?
00:10:12I'll give you that.
00:10:13What do you want?
00:10:14Don't you remember?
00:10:15My name's Fred C. Dobson.
00:10:16I'm a big part of the villa.
00:10:18Oh, yes.
00:10:19How have you been?
00:10:20Very well, thank you.
00:10:21And you?
00:10:22Fine, thank you.
00:10:23And now that the social interlude's over,
00:10:25kindly get the hell out of here or I'll lose my job.
00:10:28Oh, you disappoint me.
00:10:29I'll box all your disappointment out.
00:10:42A man!
00:11:12Help!
00:11:14Help!
00:11:15Help!
00:11:16Help!
00:11:17Help!
00:11:18Help!
00:11:19Help!
00:11:20Help!
00:11:36That was a good one.
00:11:38Well, uh, one does one's best.
00:11:41one fired from one's job. terribly sorry. look it wasn't my fault. I didn't know
00:11:46those women were going to react like that. promise to make it up to one in a big way.
00:11:51how big? modesty prevents one from saying. does one live far? near with one's mom.
00:11:58look maybe we can save it for another night. don't let's lose one's head.
00:12:04one's losing one's mood. I'll come up with something.
00:12:12Fernando. Fernando. Fernando! did I wake you? really? you're right you know.
00:12:21quarter to five on the button. what fever? 104. listen Fernando make sure you get
00:12:31plenty of aspirin and hot juices. Fernando I need a favor. would you mind
00:12:35going to an all-night movie for a couple of hours and let me use your place?
00:12:39Fernando? Fernando pronto!
00:12:47you were disconnected. that usually happens when the other party hangs up.
00:12:53look look it's late. I'm tired. I want to go home. go home? but we haven't even...
00:13:05we haven't. well let's say we have. I'll back you up if you want to brag to your friends.
00:13:11you got me all wrong. I'm a gentleman. I would never dream of talking about that.
00:13:15well of course. well let's say it did. you know mentally.
00:13:22mentally?
00:13:26somehow or other it's not quite as much fun. I didn't think it would be.
00:13:34you can't leave me here like this. oh no. but I've got a car. that's the first nice
00:13:42thing you've said to me tonight. Fernando? Fernando? how you feeling kid?
00:13:47any better? ran high huh? well listen we won't be using your place after all.
00:13:53she's got a car. now listen... hold on a moment would you?
00:14:02my dear?
00:14:05Mantle. if Millie calls I'm with you if Ornella checks the same goes for her.
00:14:13goodbye. no no no no no Millie is my wife. Ornella's my mistress. Fernando you've
00:14:22got to remember. Millie wife Ornella mistress. write it down.
00:14:31hmm get up and get a pencil. well open the oxygen tent and get one from the
00:14:38doctor. well ask the priest if he has one. Fernando? Fernando Blanco. he has got a
00:14:53lot to learn about being a true friend.
00:15:02how was it? it's beautiful. I loved it. who doesn't? still I'm eating up with
00:15:10guilt Millie my poor wife. oh don't be such a worrywart. you know the saying
00:15:13worry and care will make you lose your hair. that's an old wives tale. how many
00:15:18bald old wives do you know? it's amazing doctor. after a session with you I feel
00:15:25so completely unburdened. incredible what you accomplished with a mere scalp
00:15:29treatment. what scalp? I treat the total man from head to foot with the stop in
00:15:35between at the wallet which reminds you. tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and
00:15:43you'll tell me the details about the dream you're going to have tonight about
00:15:46the gorilla. I am not going to dream about that gorilla. the gorilla is closing on me.
00:15:52he's gaining on me. the gorilla. the gorilla. a damn gorilla. a gorilla? huh? he
00:16:02almost caught me this time and it's all that that dr. Farquhar's fault. a gorilla
00:16:06Fred? a gorilla? a big hairy horny crazy and love gorilla. I'm losing my hair.
00:16:22good night Milton. I'm Millie. who's Milton? what? Milton? who's Milton? I don't know any Milton.
00:16:38Boninotti. talk about it in the morning please. Boninotti. that's it? what's it?
00:16:49Gorilla's name. Milton.
00:17:50just a moment. it's monsieur's tennis instructor. fronto. darling I must see you.
00:17:59yes I know. a little more zip with my back. I miss you terribly. I know. well
00:18:06keep the court reserved. we'll play later.
00:18:10oh morning coffee for the world's penultimate pussycat. who could ask for
00:18:20anything more? you obviously. Fred supposing a couple married very young.
00:18:2620 as we did? as we did yes. supposing this couple found that they were no
00:18:31longer in love. were they at the beginning? oh yes I think so. at least they
00:18:37thought they were. they're still deeply fond of each other. deeply fond is a
00:18:41hell of a distance from in love. true but they're still young. they still have
00:18:45illusions. illusions? romantic. are there any other kind? those my dear are
00:18:51delusions. be kind Fred. they've got to have something. they don't have children.
00:18:56neither do we if we don't snivel about it do we? speak for yourself. very well I
00:19:02will. what this girl should do is find something to occupy her time. charity
00:19:06work. needlepoint rolling bandages for the great war. what great war? any great
00:19:11war. try to keep busy. the devil makes work for idle hands. exactly affairs. I
00:19:18told her this. it can be dangerous. on the other hand how is she going to find
00:19:23mr. Wright? mr. Wright? god how old-fashioned. it's only old-fashioned if
00:19:29she doesn't find him and she's not getting any young girl. and how is she
00:19:35going to find him if she doesn't go...
00:19:40looking?
00:19:50looking? hmm. looking? oh well that's certainly not old-fashioned is it? no but
00:20:02if she does find mr. Wright it's everything isn't it Fred? of course it
00:20:13is old girl but well I thought you said she was married. she is but it didn't
00:20:20take. like a weak vaccination. you seem awfully concerned about her but not a
00:20:25mum's thought about him. oh Fred how unfair. to her she worries about him all
00:20:30the time. feels guilty. guilty? about looking for somebody else. could he
00:20:36manage to get along without her? I mean he's never well sort of grown up. by
00:20:43choice. by choice. tell her not to worry. for him the world is full of girls. the
00:20:49safety of numbers. where he doesn't have to commit himself. make a decision or
00:20:53even change his dialogue. just change girls. you're making it sound like a play.
00:21:00why don't you write it Fred? a new idea for a comedy. oh no no no it's very
00:21:05dramatic. if I dream it tonight I'll give it to the gorilla. the gorilla? oh yes he
00:21:09could certainly write a better play than I can. now please let us end this
00:21:14interminable conversation which seems to be hitting closer and closer to home. I
00:21:18meant it to. I know that's why I want it to end.
00:21:28the gorilla could certainly write a better play than I can.
00:21:31why? why you ask? I didn't. exactly because with a bunch of bananas in a warm cage
00:21:41he's got it made. he's not overdrawn at the bank as I am. next time you get a tax
00:21:47attorney get one who's been to college.
00:21:52Millie I'm burning. please. quick. please. butter. butter for what? my bad Lord is
00:21:59courting. you're talking about butter. butter for a burn. it's a known fact.
00:22:04that's not where I got burned.
00:22:08could that beacon of skin really be? golly goodness it is. dr. Farquhar.
00:22:19how dare you come in here when I'm nude. besides I'm giving hydrotherapy.
00:22:23hydrotherapy to whom? to me you marching moron. I'm just as sick as anybody else.
00:22:29you have a victim waiting. that's patient and get out of here or I'll break every
00:22:33bone in your head. don't threaten me you pontifical quack. I have hated you since the moment I married you.
00:22:41your pores are too large. you have poor slobber.
00:22:48one step and I scatter your brains.
00:22:5420 years for hitting a man who's wearing glasses. you bat fool.
00:23:03ahhh.
00:23:25swine.
00:23:27stormtroopers.
00:23:33whoa.
00:23:35ha ha ha ha ha
00:23:56may the student riots reoccur in your stomach.
00:24:04if monsieur's tennis instructor calls again what do I say? tell him I'm having
00:24:09my racket restrung. one of these days madam may beat me to the phone. that has
00:24:14the ugly sound of blackmail. what you need is a secretary you can trust.
00:24:18someone like my niece Angelica. someone young and active. who's young and active?
00:24:23my niece Angelica. monsieur has agreed to interview her. I've agreed to... this
00:24:29afternoon. this afternoon? this afternoon I've got to visit my sister at the hospital.
00:24:35what's wrong with her? her back it's all scraped from sand at the beach. her back?
00:24:43oh well that's what you get for digging nature.
00:24:50what? give her a kiss woman.
00:25:24A sobuko con risotto di Milano. mezzo forte ma non troppo piano.
00:25:33o paparazzi non hanno coraggio. accetta prego a sieni di viaggio.
00:25:54Well, stop looking back, so I start a little fire.
00:26:20Happy birthday, Fernando.
00:26:21Feliz cumpleano.
00:26:22Happy birthday, Fernando.
00:26:23Fernando looks wonderful.
00:26:25Happy birthday, Fernando.
00:26:46It's good to be a kid.
00:26:53You're beautiful.
00:27:07I'm pregnant.
00:27:08Your eyes, mostly.
00:27:09They're luminous.
00:27:10You wouldn't marry me, even if I were carrying your child.
00:27:11Your mouth, too.
00:27:12Fascinating.
00:27:13You've lost me.
00:27:14Goodbye forever.
00:27:15I love you.
00:27:16Don't you want to give your baby a name?
00:27:24Thank you, but that won't be necessary.
00:27:27I've just decided to think positive thoughts and not be pregnant.
00:27:40The question is, will you, or won't you take off your clothes?
00:27:51Oh, Helen, but it means that much to you?
00:27:54It does.
00:27:55Ah, paradise.
00:28:24Hey, it's you, the muddle from the dirty postcards.
00:28:30And you must be the creep that bought the whole pack.
00:28:33I am, I am. I love you.
00:28:36Frankly, I love you too.
00:28:38Go on, go on.
00:28:50Happy?
00:28:52Not until you marry me.
00:28:54And what do we do about my husband?
00:28:56Fernando, happy birthday!
00:28:57Happy birthday!
00:28:59Exactly what I've been doing about your husband.
00:29:02Deceiving him.
00:29:03You? Why?
00:29:12Oh, poor Moira, you're not stealing with that person, are you?
00:29:16Giancarlo? No, but he's stealing my drama class.
00:29:20Good, drama. Good, good.
00:29:23I think you're so beautiful. I do think you'd kill it yourself.
00:29:26Oh, I can, I can.
00:29:28No, no, no, no, I meant his neck.
00:29:30Oh, that too.
00:29:47Harvard, 65.
00:29:49Harvard.
00:29:50Navy?
00:29:51Intelligence.
00:29:53Banking?
00:29:54National Trust.
00:29:56Homosexual?
00:29:57No.
00:29:58Theory.
00:30:01I can learn.
00:30:02Too late.
00:30:04What?
00:30:17Have you ever heard him speak?
00:30:21No, but then I only studied with him for five years.
00:30:27Shh, I think he's finally going to speak.
00:30:33You've chosen a difficult path, my children.
00:30:39Why, Master?
00:30:42With all these beautiful broads, a yoga can get pretty horny.
00:31:57Hey!
00:31:59With your permission, I make the caddy.
00:32:04Signorina, dances with great abandon.
00:32:07It's Signora and Razzi.
00:32:10Signora, we shall make love.
00:32:13Oh, smashing! Here now?
00:32:16No, no, no.
00:32:17Bar, the emergency.
00:32:18A bar could be.
00:32:20Back where I come from, we don't hold for ditching a woman.
00:32:24You're looking to get a nice big cross put on your lawn.
00:32:28Cute, but emotionally disturbed.
00:32:32She's from Alabama.
00:32:34I'm from the Via Veneto, and I'm disturbed as hell.
00:32:38Scusi, signore.
00:32:39I will leave.
00:32:41You won't forget.
00:32:42How could I?
00:32:44I'll never forget.
00:32:46You won't forget.
00:32:47How could I?
00:32:49I'll look for the first lawn with a burning cross.
00:32:52You won't forget what?
00:32:54His address. He wants to make love.
00:32:57Oh, madame, sassy.
00:33:00Oh, no.
00:33:11Doctors!
00:33:18Doctors, that's a lot.
00:33:22Doctors!
00:33:25There are two schools of thought in the science of scalp therapy.
00:33:29The day school and the night school.
00:33:47Wunderbar!
00:33:49And you, my dear, are going to be the first one in.
00:33:53Champagne tickles my nose.
00:33:56Imagine what it is going to do to the rest of you, eh?
00:34:08I want to thank you, doctor.
00:34:11The bubble's tickling everything.
00:34:13Oh, yes.
00:34:24No!
00:34:26No!
00:34:27No!
00:34:28Don't!
00:34:29I'm a sick man.
00:34:31Medical doctors will tell you I'm a sick man.
00:34:33Not bad, just sick.
00:34:37You missed me.
00:34:40You cretin.
00:34:42You could give me an infection.
00:34:49Are they women with whom I'm in love?
00:34:51Yes.
00:34:53But what would I be worth if I were just a...
00:34:56an ordinary call girl from the Piazza di Spanglio?
00:34:59Priceless.
00:35:01There's just no way to judge a value like yours.
00:35:04Priceless? Really?
00:35:06Really.
00:35:07Astronomica.
00:35:08The Mona Lisa, perhaps.
00:35:10Oh.
00:35:12Then I'm not priceless.
00:35:14The Mona Lisa has a price.
00:35:16Actually, you've insulted me.
00:35:18You've made me feel like that call girl from the Piazza di Spanglio.
00:35:21Fine.
00:35:22And I'm your best customer who has just given you the Mona Lisa.
00:35:25I don't want to be known as the girl who went to bed with a man
00:35:29who was stupid enough to give away the Mona Lisa.
00:35:33But Martha was right.
00:35:35I should have been a priest.
00:35:51I should have been a priest.
00:36:51Oh.
00:37:22Is he asleep?
00:37:23Oui, madame.
00:37:24He fell asleep immediately after.
00:37:26After what?
00:37:27He closed his eyes.
00:37:30Merci, Flavia.
00:37:32I appreciate your loyalty.
00:37:34Excusez-moi, madame.
00:37:37Does Monsieur Troc in his sleep sometimes?
00:37:41Sometimes?
00:37:43All the time?
00:37:45That's how I get my information?
00:37:52One o'clock in Rome means siesta.
00:37:56Everybody goes to bed.
00:37:58The square ones even sleep.
00:38:08Now, where were you all week, Federico?
00:38:15Home.
00:38:17Married men always have a perfect alibi.
00:38:20They were home.
00:38:22What can you do there you can't do here?
00:38:25Mia Cara.
00:38:26Call it habit, superstition, or what you will,
00:38:29but I can only work in my own chair, at my own desk,
00:38:33in my own study.
00:38:37Your own desk, your own chair, your own study.
00:38:42All duplicated by your own decorator.
00:39:05Aren't you pleased?
00:39:08Aren't you pleased?
00:39:10Pleased?
00:39:11Where's the fun if I think I'm home?
00:39:14Where are you going?
00:39:15Home.
00:39:16You are going back with that woman?
00:39:18It's perverted.
00:39:19That woman happens to be the mother of my children.
00:39:22You have no children.
00:39:26If you go away now, I'm going to kill myself, I will.
00:39:31Ornella, you are a spoiled juvenile.
00:39:34Whenever we argue, you take sleeping pills in massive doses.
00:39:37If all the pills you take were outside of you,
00:39:40instead of inside of you, you would look like a beaded dress.
00:39:52Oh, doctor, I'm so ashamed.
00:39:55Excuse me, but I'm the doctor.
00:39:58I don't remember calling for a consultation.
00:40:01Believe me, my dear,
00:40:03you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.
00:40:14Doctor! Doctor!
00:40:16Doctor, please!
00:40:18Please!
00:40:21Please!
00:40:23Please!
00:40:25I didn't call you for her, it was for me.
00:40:27I was afraid the shock would be terrible for my hair.
00:40:29Good thinking.
00:40:30Good thinking.
00:40:31And incidentally,
00:40:32the pill that I had myself would be terrible for my hair.
00:40:36Four o'clock means back to work
00:40:38with the squares who slept at one o'clock.
00:41:01If we ever get out of this alive,
00:41:05I'm coming back for you.
00:41:07Oh, when Mr. Wright comes looking for me,
00:41:10I hope he looks like that.
00:41:30© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:42:00© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:42:20Mia Tesson.
00:42:21For the first time in my life, I am in love.
00:42:24There's no need to say that, Max.
00:42:28Max?
00:42:29Max, or Franco, or whatever.
00:42:33The names are interchangeable.
00:42:35Like the words, for the first time, I'm in love.
00:42:38It's not necessary to say that.
00:42:41But what else can I say?
00:42:43You might say I'm pretty.
00:42:45Oh, yes, you are fantastic.
00:42:47Good.
00:42:49You might say you're glad I'm here.
00:42:52Glad? I am the...
00:42:54That will do fine, thank you.
00:42:57And now, if you want to seduce me, go right ahead.
00:43:27Hi.
00:43:58© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:44:08What's the matter?
00:44:10It's just that I don't want to be Max, or...
00:44:13Whatever.
00:44:14Yes, I am Franco, my son.
00:44:17I'll try harder.
00:44:28© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:44:38You certainly know how to spoil a Roman afternoon.
00:44:42Forgive me, Franco.
00:44:44Oh, Max.
00:44:58© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:45:01Next time, a burning cross.
00:45:05Something you did.
00:45:07Something I didn't.
00:45:14Where's Mrs. Dobbs?
00:45:15Out.
00:45:18Fine. Now, remember, I haven't left the house.
00:45:21Exactly.
00:45:22My niece is here.
00:45:23This afternoon, I am not interviewing nieces.
00:45:25This afternoon, I am working on plays.
00:45:56Now, listen.
00:45:57You are working for me, not the other way around.
00:46:01One more mistake, and I'll sell you for a quill pen.
00:46:04All right?
00:46:06All right.
00:46:26© BF-WATCH TV 2021
00:46:30Ridiculous.
00:46:52Mr. Dobbs, this is my niece, Angelica.
00:46:55I'm an author.
00:46:56I told her.
00:46:57I work in regular hours.
00:46:58I told her.
00:46:59Weekends, I told her.
00:47:00That's the salary, I think.
00:47:01Five hundred, I told her.
00:47:02Fine. You're obviously eminently qualified.
00:47:14You do type a bit, don't you?
00:47:15Ninety words a minute.
00:47:16Shorthand?
00:47:17One hundred and eighty.
00:47:19And, um...
00:47:20Thirty-eight, twenty-two, thirty-five.
00:47:23That is disgraceful.
00:47:25Thirty-eight words a minute?
00:47:26That's inadequate.
00:47:27Hello, darling.
00:47:28Have you met Flavia's niece, Angelica?
00:47:30Buongiorno, Angelica.
00:47:31Piacere, signora.
00:47:32Signora?
00:47:33You're thinking Fahrenheit.
00:47:35I mean thirty-eight words.
00:47:37Centigrade.
00:47:39Oh, of course, yes.
00:47:41Well, that would make a difference, wouldn't it?
00:47:43No, it's out of the question.
00:47:44You're far too young.
00:47:45When I need you most, you'll be stoning the U.S. Embassy.
00:47:49How's Gwendolyn, darling?
00:47:50Who?
00:47:51Your sister.
00:47:52You said you were going to the hospital to see her.
00:47:54Oh, yes.
00:47:55Her flu's much better.
00:47:58On top of her scraped back?
00:47:59No, no.
00:48:00In her chest.
00:48:01In her chest.
00:48:03Arrivederci, Angelica.
00:48:05Arrivederci, signora.
00:48:07I'm sorry, Flavia.
00:48:08I thought you were eavesdropping at the other door.
00:48:12That's the way the photographer stared at me.
00:48:16Photographer?
00:48:19Of course.
00:48:20I saw you at my barber's.
00:48:21Your barber?
00:48:23You were sure a playboy.
00:48:24You were the centerfold.
00:48:26Very lovely.
00:48:28Grazie, signora.
00:48:29Grazie a te.
00:48:30My barber thanks you, too.
00:48:33Tell me, didn't your mother mind you posing in the nude?
00:48:36Oh, very much.
00:48:38I beat her out of the job.
00:48:41That's all for now.
00:48:42I'll let you know in a few days.
00:48:44And that's it?
00:48:48That's all.
00:48:53Wow.
00:48:55I learned several senses.
00:48:57Count to three?
00:48:59Yes.
00:49:02Three.
00:49:23One.
00:49:37Admittedly, darling.
00:49:39It does look a bit...
00:49:42It does look a bit odd, but...
00:49:44Odd? Why?
00:49:45Merely a playwright and his secretary hard at work?
00:49:49Careful, I'm going to jump.
00:49:53Ah, I see you got the job.
00:49:59Well, nothing's been decided.
00:50:01No, just leave your address and telephone number, would you?
00:50:04Hotel Alberco, 689251.
00:50:07Shall I write it down?
00:50:09Oh, not necessary.
00:50:11Here, remember.
00:50:13Gracias for considering me.
00:50:15Arrivederci, señor.
00:50:18Señora.
00:50:23Are you hiring her?
00:50:25Oh, absolutely not.
00:50:28Well, I'm looking for a plain, colourless secretary.
00:50:31Someone who...
00:50:33I don't know.
00:50:35I don't know.
00:50:37I don't know.
00:50:39I don't know.
00:50:40A colourless secretary.
00:50:42Someone who blends into the furniture
00:50:44instead of climbing all over it.
00:50:46Oh, for God's sake, she looks like Brigitte Bardot.
00:50:50Bardot, eh?
00:50:52I'd love to get an interview.
00:50:54Doctor?
00:50:56How many times have I told you not to disturb me when...
00:51:05Doctor!
00:51:08Doctor!
00:51:11I've just got here.
00:51:13Well, how time flies when one is having fun, eh?
00:51:17How long was I in there?
00:51:19Please, don't involve me. I'm Swiss.
00:51:22Not even ten minutes.
00:51:26Doctor!
00:51:28Don't you have enough?
00:51:30I'm sorry.
00:51:32Bardot, eh?
00:51:34You're spending the weekend with Brigitte Bardot?
00:51:36My name is Angelica.
00:51:37Give me all the time and details you've been.
00:51:39Don't be so diffident.
00:51:41I just met her and she's perfect.
00:51:43Perfect? Perfect for what?
00:51:45My secretary.
00:51:47Even though she's a teenager, she's...
00:51:49Teen? Teen? How teen?
00:51:51Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen?
00:51:53Stop me when I get to your car.
00:51:55Eighteen.
00:51:57But she types ninety words a minute and her shorthand is...
00:51:59As if you cared.
00:52:01A hundred and eighty.
00:52:03What you really want, you hypocrite, is...
00:52:05Thirty-eight, twenty-two, thirty-five.
00:52:07God bless her.
00:52:09Bardot, eh?
00:52:11Bardot, eh?
00:52:13This girl happens to be called Angelica.
00:52:15Molto difficile, signore.
00:52:17If you could spin read to my memory.
00:52:20Do you take Diana's car?
00:52:22Con piacere.
00:52:24Ah, it comes to me.
00:52:26You must mean Angelica St-Pierre.
00:52:28Signor Dobbs!
00:52:31Aha! You are right.
00:52:33Bardot.
00:52:35I wasn't expecting you.
00:52:37I, um, just came by to tell you...
00:52:39You are fired.
00:52:41You mean I'm your secretary?
00:52:43As of right now,
00:52:45we are going to Castelli.
00:52:47Hi, Castelli!
00:52:49Work on a play.
00:52:51That's exactly what I had planned,
00:52:53but with Dr. Morty.
00:52:55Look, who is this Dr. Morty?
00:52:57My ex-boyfriend.
00:52:59Well, how ex-? Last year, last month, last week?
00:53:01Last night. We broke up over you.
00:53:03He's quite jealous.
00:53:05Jealous?
00:53:07I mean, um...
00:53:09I mean, he hardly knows me,
00:53:11and neither do you in the biblical sense.
00:53:13No!
00:53:15And I told him you are a perfect gentleman.
00:53:17Thank you.
00:53:19Charming, attentive, considerate, handsome.
00:53:21Also quite dashing.
00:53:23Dashing me?
00:53:25Definitely dashing.
00:53:27Oh, it's absurd.
00:53:29I mean, I do have a certain flair,
00:53:31but dashing, I wouldn't say that.
00:53:33Neither would I.
00:53:34I'm supposed to be dashing to you.
00:53:36You said you were going to Castelli
00:53:38with Dr. Ponty, yes?
00:53:40Yes.
00:53:42They're making a movie near there.
00:53:44The director's my ex-boyfriend.
00:53:46You ex around pretty good, don't you?
00:53:48He wasn't jealous, this director?
00:53:50Oh, no. This time I was.
00:53:52My mother got him.
00:53:54Can I start being your secretary on Monday?
00:53:56No.
00:53:58Negative, Angelica. I'm sorry.
00:54:00We just couldn't work it out.
00:54:02Child.
00:54:04Mental.
00:54:06See?
00:54:08Dr. Ponty is due at four.
00:54:10I have three minutes, too.
00:54:13If he doesn't show up at four sharp.
00:54:15Now you're being reasonable.
00:54:18That's Dr. Ponty.
00:54:20The one with the helmet.
00:54:27What does this doctor specialize in, anyway?
00:54:30The entire area below the ankles.
00:54:32Foot doctor.
00:54:34Properties.
00:54:36It's very important.
00:54:38Without feet, you fall forward.
00:54:40Oh, I can see that.
00:54:54Tell Dr. Ponty I had to go out of town.
00:54:56I'll get in touch with him later.
00:54:58Out of town, touch him later.
00:55:02Oh, he's sweet.
00:55:05Adam!
00:55:07Four o'clock.
00:55:09Dr. Ponty's not here.
00:55:11Slip out the back, meet you down the block.
00:55:31I've come to pick up Signorina St. Pierre.
00:55:32Doctor, speaking in your terms,
00:55:35you missed her by a foot.
00:55:38Ho, ho, ho.
00:55:40Very dro.
00:55:43Is there be anything else?
00:55:46You should have tried me 20 years ago.
00:55:4830?
00:55:54Frankie, who is that?
00:55:56It's a cable, madame.
00:55:59From America.
00:56:00From America.
00:56:02The name doesn't seem familiar.
00:56:04Charles Harrison.
00:56:13Uh, hi.
00:56:15I'm Charles Harrison.
00:56:18Oh, no, you are not.
00:56:20You are the movie star.
00:56:22Greg Granite.
00:56:24Thank you, my dear.
00:56:26Mr. Dobbs at home?
00:56:27Mr. Dobbs?
00:56:29I've got it, Fabio.
00:56:33Oh, Fernando, you know I'm very fond of you.
00:56:36But really, I...
00:56:46I've won.
00:56:48I've won a contest.
00:56:50In my own bathroom.
00:56:52Great, great.
00:56:57Thank you, my dear.
00:56:59And you hopefully are...
00:57:01Mrs. Dobbs.
00:57:04Delightful.
00:57:08But unfortunately,
00:57:10my business is with Mr. Dobbs.
00:57:13He's, um, away for the weekend.
00:57:16Damn.
00:57:19I sent him a telegram from California three days ago, but...
00:57:22Well, la belle Italia.
00:57:24We just arrived together.
00:57:25You're...
00:57:27Charles Harrison, yes.
00:57:29But you're Greg Granite.
00:57:31Oh, Greg Granite's my screen name.
00:57:33I thought everybody knew.
00:57:35You see, as Charlie Harrison,
00:57:37I'm Greg Granite's director and producer.
00:57:39The two names.
00:57:41It seems a little more modest that way, don't you think?
00:57:44No.
00:57:46I feel it makes for a certain mystery, don't you?
00:57:48No.
00:57:50Um, what do you want to see my husband about?
00:57:52Hand him a check for $150,000.
00:57:57$150,000?
00:57:59For what?
00:58:01Would you, uh...
00:58:04Would you mind repeating the question?
00:58:09$150,000 for what?
00:58:12His new play.
00:58:14What did Rome do with the Romanians?
00:58:16But it isn't even finished.
00:58:18Listen, in this business, you have to move fast.
00:58:19Otherwise, you end up in a tweed jacket smoking a pipe.
00:58:21While Paul Newman gets the girl.
00:58:23You'll have to wait till Monday.
00:58:25Impossible.
00:58:27I've got to be back in California by then.
00:58:29Phone him.
00:58:31Oh, I can't.
00:58:33It would involve breaking an unwritten rule.
00:58:39Great.
00:58:41Please.
00:58:50Darling?
00:58:52No, this is, um...
00:58:55Darling's wife.
00:58:57Who?
00:58:59Mildred Dobson.
00:59:01Would you please call my husband to the phone?
00:59:03Your husband, Signora?
00:59:05Why should he be here?
00:59:07I cannot account for his taste.
00:59:09But everyone in Rome knows that when he's not here, he's there.
00:59:12Everyone in Europe is so continental.
00:59:14That could also work in reverse.
00:59:16It so happens, Signora,
00:59:17your husband is not here.
00:59:19Then consider this.
00:59:21If he's not here, and he's not there,
00:59:23where in the hell is he?
00:59:27Yes.
00:59:29Just where in the hell is he?
00:59:31It's a beautiful day.
00:59:33Mind if I put the top down?
00:59:36I mean, my top.
00:59:48$150,000?
00:59:50On 90 million lire.
00:59:52Cello.
00:59:54I thought that might touch a nerve.
00:59:57Grand granite.
00:59:59Thank you, my dear.
01:00:01When we find Fred and get our hands
01:00:03on that $150,000,
01:00:05we'll have a great time.
01:00:07We'll have a great time.
01:00:09We'll have a great time.
01:00:11We'll have a great time.
01:00:13We'll have a great time.
01:00:15We'll have a great time.
01:00:17$150,000.
01:00:19Am I going to be excited about meeting you?
01:00:22Come.
01:00:25For $150,000, where are you?
01:00:29Think, think!
01:00:31I'm thinking, I'm thinking.
01:00:36He left her last week.
01:00:40Perhaps...
01:00:42She went back to Israel.
01:00:44Couldn't stand Italian food.
01:00:46I'll give it a try,
01:00:48but he couldn't be that obvious, could he?
01:00:51And you've just answered my question.
01:00:55Hotel Albergo?
01:00:57Signorina Sampier, per favore.
01:01:01Already gone?
01:01:04Signor Dobbs told me to phone him there.
01:01:11Castelli?
01:01:12Castelli?
01:01:14I see.
01:01:16Grazie.
01:01:18What kind of a girl?
01:01:20Athletic.
01:01:22If I were his mistress,
01:01:24this never could have happened.
01:01:26If I were his wife,
01:01:28he wouldn't require a mistress.
01:01:31Just the meaningless little thing Federico
01:01:34picked up for me.
01:01:36Meaningless is just the word,
01:01:38it's my old one.
01:01:43Grand Granite, am I excited!
01:01:46Like you, my dear.
01:01:48About $850,000.
01:02:06Do you believe in love at first sight?
01:02:09Oh, invariably, pussy.
01:02:12I am so glad.
01:02:14It means you have a deep social conscience.
01:02:17Oh, it does?
01:02:19It's a person's duty to promote love in this world.
01:02:22What with the Red Chinese and all this trouble,
01:02:24don't you agree?
01:02:26Oh, definitely.
01:02:36Madame is not here!
01:02:38Oh, my fancy Dobbs!
01:02:40If only I could get my hands on his feet!
01:02:43Signor is not here!
01:02:46And if you don't both leave,
01:02:48I will telephone Signor in Castelli.
01:02:50Castelli?
01:02:52Incidentally, with all this vibration,
01:02:55it's only sensible to have a pelvic examination.
01:02:58I saw it.
01:03:00I saw it with my own eyes.
01:03:02Butter, eh?
01:03:04Butter.
01:03:06Beautiful.
01:03:07It's like a cappellini flick and they go fruitcake.
01:03:09Butter, eh?
01:03:11Butter.
01:03:13Oh, that Francine Dobbs must be a lot sicker than I thought.
01:03:15Oh, I hope I'm not being disloyal to him.
01:03:17Disloyal?
01:03:19Try traitor.
01:03:21You're my beautiful little spy.
01:03:23What about your wife?
01:03:25To hell with her. Let her get her own spies.
01:03:27Oh, by the way, put these hairs back on his pillow.
01:03:32They are getting awfully worn out.
01:03:34You promised you'd get rid of your wife.
01:03:37I will. I will.
01:03:39This time I have a foolproof plan.
01:03:41I hope it's better than the last time.
01:03:43That tiger must have cost you plenty.
01:03:45I still don't know what went wrong.
01:03:47I threw her in the cage, I locked her in,
01:03:50and then she killed the tiger.
01:03:52Poor darling.
01:03:54You do try.
01:04:04Pronto?
01:04:06Ah, Signor Fernando.
01:04:08Cut it short. The music has started.
01:04:10No, she's gone for the weekend.
01:04:21Damn it.
01:04:24Pronto?
01:04:26Who's calling, madam?
01:04:29Oh, Franco.
01:04:31I do not recognize your voice.
01:04:33More dolce vita, eh?
01:04:35Oh, no.
01:04:37She won't be back before Monday.
01:04:39Castelli.
01:04:41What are you doing for the weekend?
01:04:50Sir Priesty.
01:04:52I'll put a stop to this myself.
01:05:02Go away.
01:05:03We don't want that.
01:05:15Butter.
01:05:17Bring me lots and lots of butter.
01:05:34Ah!
01:05:38Mr. Dobbs registered here?
01:05:40We haven't seen Signor Dobbs since last summer.
01:05:43Last summer?
01:05:44Who?
01:05:45Me.
01:05:49Well, we tried.
01:05:51However...
01:05:55Signor Dobbs telephone.
01:05:57They made a reservation for two for tonight.
01:05:59Good. When he arrives,
01:06:01tell him some friends are waiting in the bar.
01:06:03I remember.
01:06:06I remember!
01:06:08Rog Tiger ought to meet this guy.
01:06:11I'm going to whop her and tromp her
01:06:14and belly stomp her.
01:06:16You're going to what?
01:06:22Maybe she will.
01:06:24You was having to do with my man Franco.
01:06:26This I would like to hear.
01:06:34Grant! Grant!
01:06:36Oh!
01:06:38Thank you, my dear.
01:06:40Sit down and have a drink.
01:06:42This may turn into a fun night after all.
01:06:49Thank you for everything.
01:07:04Going to Castelli?
01:07:06Or any place else.
01:07:08Good.
01:07:28Ah! Signor Dobbs!
01:07:30Shh!
01:07:31Shh!
01:07:34Signor...
01:07:36Mangia cavallo!
01:07:38Cavallo!
01:07:40Do I go around screaming, signor Mangia cavallo?
01:07:42No!
01:07:44Why do you persist in going around screaming, signor Dobbs?
01:07:46I chose this hotel
01:07:48because I wanted to get away from
01:07:50my wife or office.
01:07:52Ah! Office!
01:07:54Your niece!
01:07:56Secretary!
01:07:58Secretary!
01:07:59Ah!
01:08:01That is one sentence
01:08:03I insist you complete yourself!
01:08:06I was going to say work,
01:08:08but you, sir, have smart mouthed your way
01:08:10out of a substantial tip.
01:08:12Your friends
01:08:14are in the bar!
01:08:17You went and put your heart
01:08:19in a Xerox machine
01:08:21and gave me just two dollars.
01:08:23You went and put your heart
01:08:25in a Xerox machine
01:08:27and gave me just two dollars.
01:08:29Oh, Mangia!
01:08:31Let's have another drink.
01:08:33I wasn't here.
01:08:35You have never seen me.
01:08:37Ah! But in truth I did.
01:08:39I lie!
01:08:41It's a mortal sin!
01:08:44Oh, come on.
01:08:46Shh!
01:08:48Mia colpa, mia colpa.
01:08:53Where the hell do we go now?
01:08:56I know just the place you're loving!
01:08:59I hate it!
01:09:01How can you?
01:09:03Sleeping out under the stars!
01:09:05It's so exciting!
01:09:07I'm not an outdoorsman!
01:09:09I'm city!
01:09:11Raised and bred.
01:09:13And frankly I get hatey
01:09:15for watching Lassie on television.
01:09:17Besides, I'm a 26-year-old man.
01:09:19You don't feel like 26 years old.
01:09:21Because I'm dashing.
01:09:23You are!
01:09:25You are!
01:09:27Debonair, perhaps,
01:09:29but dashing, well,
01:09:31I really do prefer the word debonair,
01:09:33but I suppose if you say I'm dashing, well.
01:09:49Thank you very much.
01:09:51It was a great pleasure.
01:09:53The pleasure was all mine.
01:09:56So it seemed.
01:09:59Goodbye.
01:10:11You know what's wonderful?
01:10:14Yes, but let me hear your version.
01:10:17Under the stars,
01:10:19all alone,
01:10:21just the two of us.
01:10:29Bravo!
01:11:00Oh, Mrs. Dobbs,
01:11:02you're so beautiful.
01:11:04And wicked.
01:11:06Tell me that beast of a husband
01:11:08drove you to it, tell me.
01:11:10Yes, but in a Ferrari.
01:11:12When we find him,
01:11:14I'll fix him for you, good.
01:11:16I know a little about surgery.
01:11:18Don't you dare!
01:11:20Oh!
01:11:22You're so exciting when you're angry.
01:11:24I...
01:11:30Some thoughtful strategy is required.
01:11:34Discretion.
01:11:36Sensitivity.
01:11:38Subtlety.
01:11:40Both ladies are equally beautiful.
01:11:42Desirable.
01:11:43Exquisite.
01:11:44Available?
01:11:45One hopes.
01:11:47Come in, darling.
01:11:53Oh, it's you.
01:11:54You expecting Charlie Harrison?
01:11:56He is a movie star.
01:11:58Of Franco?
01:12:00At least.
01:12:01It's getting late.
01:12:03You're honest.
01:12:05Yes, and Fred isn't.
01:12:07Running away with Angelica.
01:12:09He's an idiot.
01:12:11No, we're the idiots
01:12:13trying to change him.
01:12:15He is what he is.
01:12:17That's why I married him.
01:12:19That's why you want him.
01:12:21Are you always so blunt?
01:12:22Always.
01:12:24I know Fred better than you do.
01:12:26That's why I'm still his wife.
01:12:28No offense.
01:12:30The wife he's been lying to all this time.
01:12:32A man only lies to a woman
01:12:34if he wants to keep hold of her.
01:12:36He lies to me.
01:12:38He lies to me all the time.
01:12:40Then he loves me too.
01:12:42Of course he does.
01:12:47Sometimes I worry
01:12:49if he likes me.
01:12:50I mean, really.
01:12:52He loves you deeply.
01:12:54Devotedly.
01:12:56I'm his wife.
01:12:58I should know.
01:13:00He loves you with every
01:13:02atom of his being.
01:13:04Are we talking about Fred?
01:13:06Yes.
01:13:12He loves you.
01:13:17So,
01:13:18so,
01:13:20Miss Carolina
01:13:22says
01:13:24he
01:13:26loves you.
01:13:31Perhaps we might decide by...
01:13:33I feel I'm being crude.
01:13:37You probably are,
01:13:39but go ahead anyway.
01:13:41By flipping a coin.
01:13:43You're right.
01:13:45You are crude.
01:13:47Heads.
01:13:49But, no.
01:13:51As a guest in your country,
01:13:53I have the right of first call.
01:13:55Heads.
01:13:57I knew you couldn't turn me down,
01:13:59Signora Dobbs.
01:14:01Darling.
01:14:04Such rough legs, dearest.
01:14:07I'll rub lotion on them.
01:14:12Your arms could do with a bit of a shave, too.
01:14:16Ooh.
01:14:22Two out of three.
01:14:30Okay, okay.
01:14:32Seven out of ten.
01:14:42All right, all right.
01:14:44Seventeen out of twenty-one.
01:14:46All right.
01:15:16If they smoke this at the U.N.,
01:15:18there'll be no more wars.
01:15:40Darling, it's two o'clock.
01:15:42I'm going to bed.
01:15:44Darling, it's two o'clock.
01:15:46Please, I'm still recovering from one o'clock.
01:16:07This is Cecily B. DeMille,
01:16:09our movie director.
01:16:11Those guys on their knees are his assistants.
01:16:18When he gives an order in Italian,
01:16:20they translate into three languages,
01:16:22sort of walking subtitles.
01:16:25That keeps it fair.
01:16:27Nobody understands.
01:16:33I can't sleep.
01:16:35Therefore, we will shoot in 15 minutes.
01:16:37The, uh, the ex-boyfriend?
01:16:39Yes, Cecily B. DeMille.
01:16:41Cecily B.?
01:16:43Wasn't there a great director by that name?
01:16:45Of course.
01:16:47That's where I got it.
01:16:49Oh, how stupid of me.
01:16:52Oh, mia cara.
01:16:54Ach, meine liebe.
01:16:56Oh, my dear.
01:16:58Cecily?
01:17:00Perchè questo uomo non è truccato?
01:17:02Perchè questo uomo non è truccato?
01:17:04Why isn't this man in make-up?
01:17:06In confidenza,
01:17:08ti devo dire,
01:17:10mi dispiace che ci siamo lasciati.
01:17:12Und uns gesagte, es tut mia leid,
01:17:14dass es zwischen uns aus ist.
01:17:16Franchement, je regrette d'avoir quitté.
01:17:18Privately, my dear, I'm sorry we've broken up.
01:17:20Stay away from my secretary, you maniac!
01:17:22Come osi parlare?
01:17:24Sei solo un generico!
01:17:26Sprechen Sie nicht mehr, Sie sind ein Statist!
01:17:28Taisez-vous, vous êtes un figurant!
01:17:30Don't speak again, you are an extra!
01:17:32I don't even think
01:17:33the gorilla would find me dashing.
01:17:35Are you glad I won the toss?
01:17:47What are you really looking for, Millie?
01:17:49Mr. Wright.
01:17:51And when I'm sure it's him,
01:17:53it's he and me into the sunset,
01:17:55fade out.
01:17:57Please note, I'm awfully good at sunsets.
01:17:59What are my chances?
01:18:01Both good.
01:18:03But Harrison doesn't give me
01:18:05grand-grand it could.
01:18:14It's the first time that we've been away
01:18:16since our honeymoon.
01:18:18Are you certain that we're doing the right thing?
01:18:20Trust me.
01:18:22If I didn't think it was right,
01:18:24would I suggest a double suicide?
01:18:26Of course not.
01:18:28We should have done this years ago.
01:18:30My fault. I've been so busy.
01:18:34You've just got to love a guy like me.
01:18:58My angel.
01:19:00I'll see you at breakfast, my darling.
01:19:01But why, my love?
01:19:03I have a headache, my dearest.
01:19:05I will massage it for you, my sweet.
01:19:07Someone already is my treasure.
01:19:10What can I say?
01:19:12Try good night.
01:19:14Good night?
01:19:16Good night.
01:19:18Well, it's my own fault.
01:19:21I should have told her to save my place.
01:19:23But...
01:19:31I'm sorry.
01:20:02Bravo.
01:20:04It's Senior Dobbs.
01:20:06Darling.
01:20:21I worry.
01:20:23This is the first time
01:20:25that we've ever left the children alone.
01:20:27Sooner or later, they'll have to face life without us.
01:20:28In this case, sooner.
01:20:30They're so innocent.
01:20:32So young.
01:20:34True.
01:20:36Eva's only 20 and little Adolph is only 15.
01:20:38Exactly.
01:20:40I feel uneasy about the way you lock them
01:20:42into their own rooms.
01:20:44We must be firm.
01:20:46They're too big to sleep together any longer.
01:20:48I know, but my little Adolph.
01:20:50I mean, how is he going to feed himself
01:20:52if he's locked in?
01:20:54Just like usual.
01:20:56Eva will break down the doors,
01:20:58strap him to his high chair,
01:21:00and force-feed him just like you do.
01:21:02It's different.
01:21:04I'm his mother.
01:21:06I just hope I'm his father.
01:21:08So do I.
01:21:29Rome wasn't made in a day,
01:21:31but these spaghetti westerns are.
01:21:33Accione!
01:21:35Accione!
01:21:37Accione!
01:21:39Accione!
01:21:41Accione!
01:21:43Accione!
01:21:45Accione!
01:21:47Accione!
01:21:49Accione!
01:21:51Accione!
01:21:53Accione!
01:21:55Accione!
01:21:56Accione!
01:22:20I can't imagine
01:22:22dogs spending the night out of doors.
01:22:23Didn't you tell me
01:22:25that he was even allergic
01:22:27to artificial flowers?
01:22:29Angelica's very persuasive
01:22:31when she makes up her body.
01:22:33I was going to say mind,
01:22:35but you're probably right.
01:23:23Where are you?
01:23:25Where are you?
01:23:28Where are you?
01:23:30Where are you?
01:23:32Where are you?
01:23:35Where are you?
01:23:53Where are you?
01:24:23Fred!
01:24:26See, Dobbs?
01:24:54You think of everything.
01:25:09This is Charlie Harrison.
01:25:11Hi.
01:25:12You look like grand-granny to me.
01:25:14Thank you, my dear.
01:25:16Dobbs, I'm an admirer of your work,
01:25:18personal as well as professional.
01:25:20I'm a great admirer of yours.
01:25:21I'd like to buy the screen rights
01:25:23to your new play.
01:25:30Now then,
01:25:32this may seem a little hard-hearted,
01:25:34but I have a lot to gain
01:25:36from you and Millie here fighting.
01:25:38Sorry to disappoint you,
01:25:40but we're not going to fight.
01:25:42Oh, no?
01:25:44Try this for size.
01:25:46How are you going to explain
01:25:48your, uh, secretary?
01:25:49And all this to Millie.
01:25:51We never fight.
01:25:53Exactly, and not that it's any of your business,
01:25:55but I was going to tell her the truth.
01:25:57The truth?
01:25:59You'd no longer lie to me?
01:26:07You mean you want me to lie to you?
01:26:09Of course.
01:26:11Then I'd know you still cared.
01:26:13Perfect, perfect.
01:26:15I've got a nasty feeling this is it.
01:26:17Fred Dobbs,
01:26:19let's see, Dobbs, hear me good.
01:26:21I'm going to Rome,
01:26:23and when you get back, I...
01:26:25won't be there.
01:26:39John Wilkes Booth,
01:26:41also an actor.
01:26:50Hold my hand.
01:26:54Forever.
01:26:56From here to eternity.
01:27:19Huh?
01:27:38Oh, pervert!
01:27:40Oh, treachery!
01:27:42Oh, disappointment!
01:27:49Oh, disappointment!
01:28:20Oh!
01:28:45Get rid of that blonde!
01:28:46How does she know I'm a blonde?
01:28:48Where did I go wrong?
01:28:51You gland!
01:28:53I'd stop smoking if I was you.
01:28:58Get off of you!
01:29:00Get it off!
01:29:17Ah!
01:29:29All this over me?
01:29:47I've called the police!
01:29:49I've called the police!
01:29:51It's a nightmare.
01:29:53I'll wake up,
01:29:55my clothes will be on,
01:29:56and it will all go away.
01:29:57Police!
01:29:58Police!
01:30:06Come on.
01:30:09Oh!
01:30:13Woof!
01:30:14Woof!
01:30:17Hang on.
01:30:19Woof!
01:30:22Woof!
01:30:23Woof!
01:30:24Woof!
01:30:25Woof!
01:30:44Woof!
01:30:45Come on, let's get out of here!
01:31:16Come on!
01:31:26Come on!
01:31:45Bring back my stagecoach!
01:32:03You're damned right we will!
01:32:15Come on!
01:32:45We just don't have this kind of fun in Alabama.
01:32:55Right!
01:32:56It would be bad to spare a cow. I sure like these Catholic countries.
01:33:25Come on!
01:33:26Come on!
01:33:27Come on!
01:33:28Come on!
01:33:29Come on!
01:33:30Come on!
01:33:31Come on!
01:33:32Come on!
01:33:33Come on!
01:33:34Come on!
01:33:35Come on!
01:33:36Come on!
01:33:37Come on!
01:33:38Come on!
01:33:39Come on!
01:33:40Come on!
01:33:41Come on!
01:33:42Come on!
01:33:43Come on!
01:33:44Come on!
01:33:45Come on!
01:33:46Come on!
01:33:47Come on!
01:33:48Come on!
01:33:49Come on!
01:33:50Come on!
01:33:51Come on!
01:33:52Come on!
01:33:53Come on!
01:33:54Come on!
01:33:55Come on!
01:33:56Come on!
01:33:57Come on!
01:33:58Come on!
01:33:59Come on!
01:34:00Come on!
01:34:01Come on!
01:34:02Come on!
01:34:03Come on!
01:34:04Come on!
01:34:05Come on!
01:34:06Come on!
01:34:07Come on!
01:34:08Come on!
01:34:09Come on!
01:34:10Come on!
01:34:11Come on!
01:34:12Come on!
01:34:13Come on!
01:34:14Come on!
01:34:15Come on!
01:34:16Come on!
01:34:17Come on!
01:34:18Come on!
01:34:19Come on!
01:34:20Come on!
01:34:21Come on!
01:34:22Come on!
01:34:23Come on!
01:34:24Come on!
01:34:25Come on!
01:34:26Come on!
01:34:27Come on!
01:34:28Come on!
01:34:29Come on!
01:34:30Come on!
01:34:31Come on!
01:34:32Come on!
01:34:33Come on!
01:34:34Come on!
01:34:35Come on!
01:34:36Come on!
01:34:37Come on!
01:34:38Come on!
01:34:39Come on!
01:34:40Come on!
01:34:41Come on!
01:34:42Come on!
01:34:43Come on!
01:34:44Come on!
01:34:45Come on!
01:34:46Come on!
01:34:47Come on!
01:34:48Come on!
01:34:49Come on!
01:34:50Come on!
01:34:51Come on!
01:34:52Come on!
01:34:53Come on!
01:34:54Come on!
01:34:55Come on!
01:34:56Come on!
01:34:57Come on!
01:34:58Come on!
01:34:59Come on!
01:35:00Come on!
01:35:01Come on!
01:35:02Come on!
01:35:03Come on!
01:35:04Come on!
01:35:05Come on!
01:35:06Come on!
01:35:07Come on!
01:35:08Come on!
01:35:09Come on!
01:35:10Come on!
01:35:11Come on!
01:35:12Come on!
01:35:13Come on!
01:35:14Come on!
01:35:15Come on!
01:35:16Come on!
01:35:17Come on!
01:35:18Come on!
01:35:19Come on!
01:35:20Come on!
01:35:21Come on!
01:35:22Come on!
01:35:23Come on!
01:35:24Come on!
01:35:25Come on!
01:35:26Come on!
01:35:27Come on!
01:35:28Come on!
01:35:29Come on!
01:35:30Come on!
01:35:31Come on!
01:35:32Come on!
01:35:33Come on!
01:35:34Come on!
01:35:35Come on!
01:35:36Come on!
01:35:37Come on!
01:35:38Come on!
01:35:39Come on!
01:35:40Come on!
01:35:41Come on!
01:35:42Come on!
01:35:43Come on!
01:35:44Come on!
01:35:45Come on!
01:35:46Come on!
01:35:47Come on!
01:35:48Come on!
01:35:49Come on!
01:35:50Come on!
01:35:51Come on!
01:35:52Come on!
01:35:53Come on!
01:35:54Come on!
01:35:55Come on!
01:35:56Come on!
01:35:57Come on!
01:35:58Come on!
01:35:59Come on!
01:36:00Come on!
01:36:01Come on!
01:36:02Come on!
01:36:03Come on!
01:36:04Come on!
01:36:05Come on!
01:36:06Come on!
01:36:07Come on!
01:36:08Come on!
01:36:09Come on!
01:36:10Come on!
01:36:11Come on!
01:36:12Come on!
01:36:13Come on!
01:36:14Come on!
01:36:15Come on!
01:36:16Come on!
01:36:17Come on!
01:36:18Come on!
01:36:19Come on!
01:36:20Come on!
01:36:21Come on!
01:36:22Come on!
01:36:23Come on!
01:36:24Come on!
01:36:25Come on!
01:36:26Come on!
01:36:27Come on!
01:36:28Come on!
01:36:29Come on!
01:36:30Come on!
01:36:31Come on!
01:36:32Come on!
01:36:33Come on!
01:36:34Come on!
01:36:35Come on!
01:36:36Come on!
01:36:37Come on!
01:36:38Come on!
01:36:39Come on!
01:36:40Come on!
01:36:41Come on!
01:36:42Come on!
01:36:43Come on!
01:36:44Come on!
01:36:45Come on!
01:36:46Come on!
01:36:47Come on!
01:36:48Come on!
01:36:49Come on!
01:36:50Come on!
01:36:51Come on!
01:36:52Come on!
01:36:53Come on!
01:36:54Come on!
01:36:55Come on!
01:36:56Come on!
01:36:57Come on!
01:36:58Come on!
01:36:59Come on!
01:37:00Come on!
01:37:01Come on!
01:37:02Come on!
01:37:03Come on!
01:37:04Come on!
01:37:05Come on!
01:37:06Come on!
01:37:07Come on!
01:37:08Come on!
01:37:09Come on!
01:37:10Come on!
01:37:11Come on!
01:37:12Come on!
01:37:13Come on!
01:37:14Come on!
01:37:15Come on!
01:37:16Come on!
01:37:17Come on!
01:37:18Come on!
01:37:19Come on!
01:37:20Come on!
01:37:21Come on!
01:37:22Come on!
01:37:23Come on!
01:37:24Come on!
01:37:25Come on!
01:37:26Come on!
01:37:27Come on!
01:37:28Come on!
01:37:29Come on!
01:37:30Come on!
01:37:31Come on!
01:37:32Come on!
01:37:33Come on!
01:37:34Come on!
01:37:35Come on!
01:37:36Come on!
01:37:37Come on!
01:37:38Come on!
01:37:39Come on!
01:37:40Come on!
01:37:41Come on!
01:37:42Come on!
01:37:43Come on!
01:37:44Come on!
01:37:45Come on!
01:37:46Come on!
01:37:47Come on!
01:37:48Come on!
01:37:49Come on!
01:37:50Come on!
01:37:51Come on!
01:37:52Come on!
01:37:53Come on!
01:37:54Come on!
01:37:55Come on!
01:37:56Come on!
01:37:57Come on!
01:37:58Come on!
01:37:59Come on!
01:38:00Come on!
01:38:01Come on!
01:38:02Come on!
01:38:03Come on!
01:38:04Come on!
01:38:05Come on!
01:38:06Come on!
01:38:07Come on!
01:38:08Come on!
01:38:09Come on!
01:38:10Come on!
01:38:11Come on!
01:38:12Come on!
01:38:13Come on!
01:38:14Come on!
01:38:15Come on!
01:38:16Come on!
01:38:17Come on!
01:38:18Come on!
01:38:19Come on!
01:38:20Come on!
01:38:21Come on!
01:38:22Come on!
01:38:23Come on!
01:38:24Come on!
01:38:25Come on!
01:38:26Come on!
01:38:27Come on!
01:38:28Come on!
01:38:29Come on!
01:38:30Come on!
01:38:31Come on!
01:38:32Come on!
01:38:33Come on!
01:38:34Come on!
01:38:35Come on!
01:38:36Come on!
01:38:37Come on!
01:38:38Come on!
01:38:39Come on!
01:38:40Come on!
01:38:41Come on!
01:38:42Come on!
01:38:43Come on!
01:38:44Come on!
01:38:45Come on!
01:38:46Come on!
01:38:47Come on!
01:38:48Come on!
01:38:49Come on!
01:38:50Come on!
01:38:51Come on!
01:38:52Come on!
01:38:53Come on!
01:38:54Come on!
01:38:55Come on!
01:38:56Come on!
01:38:57Come on!
01:38:58Come on!
01:38:59Come on!
01:39:00Come on!
01:39:01Come on!
01:39:02Come on!
01:39:03Come on!
01:39:04Come on!
01:39:05Come on!
01:39:06Come on!
01:39:07Come on!
01:39:08Come on!
01:39:09Come on!
01:39:10Come on!
01:39:11Come on!
01:39:12Come on!
01:39:13Come on!
01:39:14Come on!
01:39:15Come on!
01:39:16Come on!
01:39:17We are we Are Very Garlic
01:39:27So groove into it , yeah yeah
01:39:29Be free just groove into it
01:39:31com'on
01:39:32Come on move into