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Amusant
Transcription
00:00Now for the plot of Team Sonic Racing.
00:03Amy says she and Omochao and Big are having a picnic, and wants Sonic and his friends to join her.
00:10Since when does she hang out with Big and Omochao?
00:14They aren't exactly close friends.
00:17They have almost nothing in common,
00:19and there's nothing about them that would inspire her to want to get to know them better.
00:24Especially not Omochao.
00:26And Sonic says he got invited to a race by a ridiculous-looking character with nothing but boring dialogue.
00:34Why does he talk so much?
00:36Amy, Knuckles, and Sonic don't trust him since he reminds them of Eggman.
00:41But because Sonic loves a challenge, he agrees to go with them anyways.
00:46Which is only cool because it doesn't result in him getting blown up by a car that's actually a trap.
00:52I'll never mention these specific characters saying they don't trust him again,
00:56so it can be as non-repetitive as possible.
01:00It's explained that the winner of the racing tournament gets to keep his car.
01:05That's ridiculous, and Tails lampshades it, revealing he doesn't trust them either.
01:11And no wonder why he doesn't care if they die or not.
01:15The reason this plot sucks is that most of it is padded out by the characters saying they don't trust Dot on Pop,
01:21when that doesn't need to be done more than once.
01:24Think of how much money and time they'd have saved that way.
01:28And you'd see there's no excuse, unless they were literally forced to have that much cutscene time.
01:34I like that Sonic and Big are having fun with the racing.
01:38Tails says the technology is advanced.
01:41That's all he does to express that so far.
01:44It's very boring.
01:46Throughout the entire game, it's not like he's getting super excited about it,
01:49so it's not done in an entertaining way.
01:53Even Amy says his tech is amazing.
01:55And it's so fast, it's scary.
01:57Even though she's been carried by Sonic while he was running before,
02:01and is faster than Sonic Heroes.
02:04It must be faster than Sonic.
02:06Seriously, how is she topping Tails in the geek out department?
02:11It's weird in a metasense to see Amy getting along with Omochao,
02:15but he is nice.
02:17It's sympathetic that Big misses his pet.
02:20And it's good that he's written to say that to prove that the writer didn't forget him.
02:25What faint praise.
02:27The last racer in every lap will be eliminated until only the fastest remains, apparently.
02:33I'm just confused because they all survive it with no injuries.
02:37Why does Sonic agree to it?
02:39It's like he has total faith in his friends to not get hurt while they're obligated to stay in the racecars.
02:45For no reason.
02:47Infector's sources also informed him of the contest.
02:51It's racist of Blaze to say Tanooki are all tricksters.
02:56Anyways, this guy must have interdimensional portal tech and time travel tech.
03:00That's even overpowered for Eggman.
03:03Why does he invite these two? How did he know about them if he's an alien?
03:07Unless he was spying on Mobius.
03:10He must have been. He must have known about Sonic's escapades.
03:13But what made him start spying on the planet before Eggman started causing trouble?
03:18A cash prize is all that's needed to motivate Vector, which is justified because he needs the money.
03:24Cubot calls Eggman forgetful.
03:26And Cubot's called stupid instead of himself.
03:29And Cubot misses his point because at least he was called special.
03:33Why does Tails nervously lie to Knuckles? He's supposed to trust him.
03:38It's not like him to instantly give up instead of trying to ask him what he's talking about.
03:43Why does he say no funny business like he doesn't trust Tails to be a good person?
03:48If he doesn't trust him, why doesn't he ask him what he was talking about?
03:53All he'd have to do is threaten him.
03:55Why would he object to cheating in a dangerous race?
03:59Whatever helps him survive is worth it.
04:01The pacing in these cutscenes is faster than I thought, but still annoyingly slow.
04:07Donna and Paws says the team belonging to Eggman is joining the race.
04:12Cubot's offended that the Eggpawns are Eggman's team instead of them.
04:16And Orbot justifies that they need to maintain the power levels of the unstable core and take care of the veggie garden.
04:23I like that it's revealed he has a veggie garden because it makes sense that he'd save money having lettuce and tomato for his cheeseburgers get grown for him.
04:31This confirms that Eggman would be the type to have a greenhouse.
04:35Shadow's arrogant and standoffish to Sonic, and he's impressed enough to admit that he could be useful to him in stopping Eggman's plans.
04:47Shadow doesn't trust Donna and Paws either, and plans to crush both him and Eggman.
04:53When he isn't gonna end up killing Donna and Paws.
04:56When he could easily do so in a second.
04:59So he must be just lying to sound cool, and he doesn't really have the motivation.
05:04You can't establish that he'd like to crush Eggman without making me wonder why Eggman lived this long.
05:10Because he's gonna be close to him eventually, and at that point, why doesn't he just cast control towards him and then kill him?
05:16It's not like he knows Sonic would stop him, because he's fine with telling him about this, and Sonic isn't objecting to it.
05:24Naturally, because he tried to ram into him as Super Sonic in Sonic 3.
05:29Silver says Eggman and Donna and Paws are working together.
05:33Why didn't Silver telekinetically grab them when they were talking about an engine?
05:37It sure is convenient for the villains that apparently post those six Silvers too wimpy to even risk injuring people with telekinesis.
05:46He could've ended the story right here.
05:49Because it could've threatened Eggman into telling him what was going on by saying he wouldn't let him go until he told him the truth.
05:57And then why wouldn't he just carry him to a jail?
06:01What are the chances both Sonic and Shadow would say the same thing?
06:07Rouge says she doesn't trust Donna and Paws because he's working with Eggman, and Omega's here too out of nowhere.
06:14Omochao doesn't express opposition to his plan to kill Eggman, and just defines what the word means.
06:21You'd think a good robot would be opposed to killing in general.
06:25Amy tells Big that just because someone gives you a gift doesn't mean they're nice, which is good for giving a valuable lesson to kids.
06:33Too bad it drags on to make Big look stupid for the first time in canon.
06:38Assuming the recent games even are canon.
06:41Sonic taunts Eggman, and Orbot says he lost over 271 times before.
06:47I doubt that applies to all the canon times he fought him, since there aren't even 100 official Sonic games.
06:53So he's referencing a bunch of off-screen incidents.
06:58And Eggman sends a ton of robots after them for the heroes to take forever discussing.
07:03Eggman says he can build them faster than they can break them.
07:07That makes no sense.
07:09Someone would stop him from building them if he was right next to them.
07:13He must be talking to them through a PA system.
07:16And anyways, wouldn't he have his robots mass-manufactured by robots and automatic machines in general?
07:23Because that's much faster than building them all by hand.
07:27It's annoying that Big trusts Don and Pop for so long.
07:31He says Wisps like nice people and they like him.
07:34So Amy says Big might have a point.
07:37She should say that acting nice outwardly doesn't mean you're a good person.
07:42Just that he's only polite to the Wisps.
07:43And said she has a bad message.
07:46Orbot snarking at Eggman isn't satisfying for me because I always wonder why he isn't even punished, let alone why he's able to do that.
07:54There's nothing interesting to talk about in this section of the story because it's nothing new.
07:59Sonic goes from telling Silver to get his head in the game to saying it'll make him look silly in the race two different times.
08:05When he doesn't really remember him trying to kill him.
08:09So he's a jerk to him for no reason in the games too.
08:13Blaze tells Silver a good job and gets thanked and cares enough about him to ask what's going on with him.
08:20Even though they're complete strangers.
08:23While the protagonist didn't care.
08:25Silver is being a Roywort.
08:28And he doesn't have precognition.
08:31Cubot gets jealous when he sees Eggman with other robots.
08:34It's not entirely weird because Eggman's his father by robot standards.
08:39So it's like being jealous of your sibling spending more time with your parents.
08:45Big warns Amy there's someone hiding nearby.
08:48Somehow Amy doesn't listen and only says that's nice.
08:52That's out of character.
08:54At least he enjoyed getting to see a cloud.
08:57Blaze says people lie to her daily because she's a princess.
09:01I guess out of fear.
09:03That comes out of nowhere.
09:05She wears nothing but the same outfit every day.
09:09So what would they lie to her about?
09:12If they're not lying about how good her clothes look.
09:16Tails is Vector's source.
09:19That's less lazy.
09:21But makes the world feel small.
09:23Why does it tell Kinetic to turn to Omochao for help?
09:27He wants a way to supervise the whole track.
09:30Because one person can't do that.
09:32What he should say is he can only hover for so long.
09:36Omochao says a whole lot of people would be required to do that.
09:40The Chao.
09:42Why are both Hero and Dark Chao in the audience together?
09:45If Dark Chao are evil, wouldn't they be fighting the Hero Chao?
09:50Silver thanks the scrappy character of the series.
09:54Seriously, wouldn't Hero and Dark Chao be from two different places?
09:57One being a home for abused Chao?
10:00Orbot says he likes Lintz.
10:02So that's sort of relatable.
10:03Amy sees the Chao in the stands pointing.
10:07What does Zavok think Chao are discussing?
10:10How does he assume that?
10:12And Orbot tells Eggman off for always keeping the mic button held down.
10:17Eggman's incompetence is the only interesting thing about this plot.
10:21And I still don't like him being a parody of himself.
10:24Why is Zavok working for Eggman with no conscience sight?
10:29It's easy to assume he was brainwashed.
10:32Because Eggman brainwashed Tails and Amy into being against Sonic and Pinball Party.
10:38And as for why he doesn't do that to Sonic's friends again?
10:41That would be too easy.
10:43And this is the same idiot who went to Sonic when he was asleep just to put slow shoes on him.
10:48Or it could be a robot that just looks like Zavok to confuse Sonic.
10:52So he can feel good about himself for confusing him.
10:55The meta reason is, they somehow thought even one of the Zeti was popular enough to deserve being here.
11:02Donald Pa thinks people only show their true colors when angry.
11:07So clearly he had a rough life.
11:09Vector says Donald Pa owns the biggest car corporation in the universe and is the king of a planet named after himself.
11:17How does he juggle those two jobs?
11:20Now I feel like there aren't any people on that planet.
11:23Why does Big think both CEOs and kings are always nice?
11:28That's impossibly stupid for anyone.
11:31The only way he'd be nice is if he's a constitutional monarch.
11:35In which case, it would make sense that he'd have nothing to do.
11:39Donald Pa is also a perfectionist.
11:42How is he both an engineer and a president of a company?
11:47That's a lot of work.
11:49Two different college courses.
11:50If he knows about the heroes, he would know about Tails.
11:53So why didn't he go to Tails for help?
11:55Donald would have been popular from his personality.
11:59So it's too bad his stupid design killed that potential by guaranteeing no one would want him back.
12:05How does he generate energy from the racers?
12:08Well, I guess for the same reason that animals generate energy for badniks.
12:14But it's confusing because it's not like there's a roof over their heads when they're in the car.
12:20And when an animal's in a badnik, it's surrounded.
12:24Amy apologizes to him for the whole he-must-be-working-for-Eggman thing, even though I'm pretty sure he was.
12:30Why does she talk like he wasn't?
12:33Sonic thinks Donald's a good guy now because he's very simple-minded in his way of thinking.
12:38If he was good, he wouldn't have said in front of him that some of them might not survive the race.
12:43Silver spends time annoying Eggman who implies that he wants the engine energy to kill Sonic
12:47and is easily pressured into admitting he hired Zavok to steal the thing,
12:52rather than making a robot like Metal Sonic do it.
12:55I can understand not simply using Zavok to fight Sonic because Zavok failed at that before.
13:01It makes sense he wanted to mean him by using him as a mere grunt to race for him.
13:06It's amusing that Big sucks at explaining things to Amy.
13:10But it's a joke with no punchline because the heroes don't react.
13:14They just immediately assume he was talking about a kidnapping.
13:17Why have a scene where Donald's worried about the engine not getting enough energy?
13:22Eggman stopped the engine from getting completed.
13:25This is a game where Eggman's humiliated the most.
13:28Colors has nothing on this.
13:30At least in that game, he was having things get accomplished the entire game.
13:34The heroes show up and it's explained that they beat his robots
13:38and Sonic challenges them to a race Zavok loses.
13:42Sonic tells Eggman to release Donald
13:45as I'm wondering why nobody's questioning why Zavok's working for Eggman.
13:49And he says about that.
13:52Another thing repetitive about the story is Eggman constantly sending Eggpawns after the heroes.
13:57Who cares?
13:59He wonders how they could've beaten Metal Sonic.
14:02A robot is all about speed.
14:04But if he's constrained himself to a car, of course he might lose.
14:08And he says that any words out of him would've only made him angrier,
14:11which finally explains why he doesn't let him talk anymore.
14:15Why does Eggman talk like he pays people when Zavok says he isn't getting paid?
14:20Making it confusing that he's working for him without the SETI.
14:23It's like he's talking like he wishes he was paying people.
14:26But why wouldn't he pay them then?
14:29And why would Eggman wish he paid people?
14:32Why does the story keep having Don Don and Eggman talk to each other?
14:36It's boring.
14:38All it had to do was establish once that they need to keep having people race to give the engine more energy.
14:44And that would build up all the tension needed.
14:47It'd still be fake. We know they'll fail.
14:50Why does Don Don think someone who kidnapped him is gonna let him use the engine for what he wanted?
14:55He's actually surprised he stole it.
14:58Even though he implied he was cynical earlier, and he must be if he doesn't care if people die in his races.
15:04I guess it's just that he's stupid.
15:05The monster machine went crazy and is heading for a place Eggman doesn't want it to.
15:10I guess someone was incredibly incompetent.
15:13Why is there an S after Fortresses?
15:16Sonic tells his friends to grab the guys you can't fly to get them out of the airship.
15:21He takes the situation seriously.
15:23The writers have learned since Colors.
15:26Sonic's character is perfect in this game.
15:28He's not cracking jokes and snarking for way too long.
15:32I wish Tails was the one making the plan though.
15:35I get why Sonic does it because he's the main character, but Tails is supposed to be smart.
15:40And there's no point in Tails being here if he's not gonna do anything smart.
15:46Amy's worried about Sonic when his fangirls should've assumed he'd survive already.
15:51Even Shadow had more faith.
15:53All the race cards were blown up.
15:57Don Don says that he'll give them all new cards as a reward for saving his life.
16:01And Sonic's fun-loving once again by looking forward to them all racing again right away.
16:07This was a boring story.
16:09One of the most repetitive ones in the series.
16:12And the most disrespectful game to Eggman.
16:15At the same time, the only interesting thing about the story was they kept looking uncharacteristically incompetent in new ways because it was the only creativity it had.

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