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KurzfilmeTranskript
00:00All of your tests have been completed to get your death date.
00:04Are you ready for your results?
00:05Oh my god, I'm gonna die.
00:07It's okay. What does it say?
00:0921,490.
00:12Nicole, that's almost 60 years from now.
00:15What does yours say, babe?
00:16345.
00:18Days?
00:20That is not ideal.
00:24My ex-fiancee dropped me like a hot potato.
00:27Nicole's body was really hot.
00:29I'd love to do her, but, you know, I wouldn't because of you.
00:32Unless you could've watched.
00:35Some people are into that. Weirdos.
00:37Me and the boys heading to the strip club tonight.
00:40There's women everywhere, I'm just saying.
00:43Do I start dating again?
00:46I'm Mortimer.
00:48I am a mortician.
00:49You know what, Mr. Addison?
00:51That is not your shade.
00:55Do you wanna feel?
00:57You're magic.
00:59Hey, do you wanna get out of here?
01:02I've never had sex with a prostitute before.
01:05Professional escort.
01:06Sorry, with a professional escort.
01:12Rita?
01:16I didn't do anything to her.
01:18Well, you still owe me for Rita's services.
01:20She said it was free.
01:21I ain't handing out free samples.
01:22This ain't Trader Joe's.
01:25I just joined this dating service that matches you with people based on death dates.
01:30I'll be doing your video interview.
01:32Lasers!
01:34So what kind of gal are you looking for?
01:36Kind, honest, a little bit boring, maybe.
01:39You're gonna die soon? I'm gonna die soon. Let's go on a date.
01:43I'd love to hang out with you again.
01:45It's gonna be okay, I promise.
01:47It's not like I have much time to build a future with someone.
01:51So where's my money, man? You got it?
01:53Five thousand? Don't make me use it.
01:55Go on then. I don't even care.
01:58I'm gonna die anyway.
02:01You better have my money in full by midnight tomorrow.
02:03Or he's going to hurt me.
02:13I just wish I met you sooner.
02:15Better late than never.
02:22I've just been so angry, afraid, happy, all at the same time.
02:28Have a seat, Mortimer.
02:30Relax.
02:31When you and Nicole were dating, did you guys ever try pegging?
02:35Pegging? What is that?
02:36Pegging is when a girl puts on a dildo and bangs it.