‘90 Day Fiancé’ Statler STRESSES About Move w Dempsey
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00:00If you work with my family, they won't pay you.
00:03Well, then what are we going to do for a job?
00:05If we can't go there and have any type of a life,
00:07why would we do this?
00:1090 Day Fiancé the other way, Shekinah
00:13is annoyed at Sarper for keeping his little black book
00:15and his bottle collection.
00:17So she's bringing something of her own
00:19to Turkey, a 143-page letter that one of her exes
00:22wrote for her.
00:24He went to the boarding school that I went to,
00:27and we were madly in love, and we
00:30were forbidden from speaking to each other.
00:32We couldn't even be in the same room together
00:34because it was a very strict Christian school.
00:38So we resorted to writing letters,
00:40and he wrote me a 143-page letter.
00:44And I saved it for many years because it was just
00:49really very special to me.
00:51And it was like the longest letter I'd ever heard of.
00:56I was like, let me just bring this with me to Turkey
00:59and put this in Sarper, give him a dose of his own medicine
01:01and see how he does with something from my past
01:04because I have been so patient with him,
01:07and he should know that I'm in business.
01:10Statler is prepping to move across the pond with Dempsey,
01:13but Dempsey just sold her home and was
01:15planning on living in a camper, which Statler
01:17is a bit stressed out about.
01:20Dempsey sold me the idea kind of as carefree and easygoing,
01:25and it's actually been a lot of decisions and super hectic.
01:29And with my ADHD and the way my brain works,
01:32it's really been overwhelming for me,
01:35so I'm just kind of checked out.
01:38I have anxiety about leaving the country and living in a van,
01:42traveling full time for the first time,
01:44and just being worried about all of that just paralyzes me.
01:51Yeah, I've been left with a lot to deal with.
01:56I just, like, don't want to talk.
01:57Yeah.
01:58You deal with it all, and I'll see you when I land.
02:01Yeah, you have done the majority of everything,
02:04so I appreciate that.
02:06Honestly, Statler's reaction is pretty relatable,
02:09and I, too, would be concerned about not having a bathtub.
02:13This is not something I would normally
02:15do if I were not in love.
02:18I'm not just moving countries.
02:20I'm learning a new way of life.
02:24If it were a vacation, it would be nice and easy,
02:27and I could come back afterwards and, you know,
02:30have my bathtub and my shower and my washing machine.
02:34But this, like, I think on paper this sounds very romantic.
02:39No, I think on paper it also sounds crazy.
02:41Actually, it's crazy.
02:42I know it's crazy.
02:44It feels crazy.
02:46I just hope I don't end up homeless and heartbroken
02:49in the middle of Europe.
02:51Dempsey met up with a friend and admitted
02:52that she's concerned about how Statler will handle van life.
02:56Are you sure Statler's the right person
02:58to be doing the trip with?
03:00I don't know.
03:03I don't think that living in a van
03:05and traveling around is, like, her ideal.
03:09I think that she likes to have, like, more structure in her life
03:11and know where she's going to be and what she's going to do
03:13and where she's going to work and stuff like that.
03:16What if you get, like, halfway through your route
03:18and she's like, I can't do this anymore?
03:21Well, I didn't really think of that.
03:23Because she could.
03:24She could, yeah.
03:27I really do want this relationship to work out.
03:30But the truth is we really don't know each other all that well.
03:33We are complete opposites.
03:36And I honestly really don't know what
03:37will happen between us if she can't handle life on the road.
03:41James was taking Natalia to the airport to head to Indonesia.
03:44And the topic of what he'll be doing for work
03:46when he makes the big move came up.
03:48He thought he'd be working for her family.
03:50But she says that they're not going to pay him,
03:52which left him shocked.
03:54If you work with my family, they won't pay you.
04:00Well, then what are we going to do for a job?
04:01Because you said it was going to be a job.
04:03But now you're telling me I'm not going to make
04:05any money working for them?
04:07They never pay for a family.
04:10OK, then why did we make that our plan,
04:13that we were going to do that as a job?
04:16If we can't go there and have any type of a life,
04:18why would we do this?
04:19I'm not going to move somewhere if I can't take care of you.
04:25That's very unsettling.
04:28We can just get the banana chip from my dad's house.
04:32And then we go to another city to sell it there.
04:36We're buying the chips from him.
04:38And then we're selling them ourselves, commissioned.
04:40Exactly.
04:41The whole convo that they were having
04:43sounded like something they should have talked about
04:44before they headed to the airport.
04:47So how long do you think it'll take us
04:49before we make any type of money?
04:53That's the thing.
04:53There's so many banana chips in Indonesia.
04:57We need to fight for it, even get to the store.
05:02You're making it sound like it's not going to be profitable.
05:04Like, yes or no, are we going to make money or not?
05:06Yes or no?
05:07Yes, we can.
05:09But we need to do it really good.
05:12I hate that we're having this conversation
05:14right here, right now.
05:16Do you think I'm not hate to have a conversation
05:19last minute about Jojo?
05:21James has been dragging his feet about telling
05:23his family about the big move.
05:25And maybe that has something to do with the fact
05:27that he revealed that he has done this before in the past.
05:30This will be the second time I've done something like this.
05:35I was married once previously.
05:37And we were in Maine for about six months
05:41before my ex decided she didn't want to be here
05:45anymore due to the cold.
05:47So she made me move to Florida.
05:51I actually said I didn't want to go.
05:53But at that point, she made it very clear
05:55that she was going to go with or without me.
05:59When I left, my family had to downsize the entire company.
06:03There was not enough mechanics to do
06:05all the work.
06:07I felt guilty for leaving everybody else behind.
06:09And we were married for less than a year.
06:12He broke the news about the move to his brother, who was shocked.
06:16What do you mean you're not coming back?
06:18Like, ever?
06:20She's had a hard time acclimating to being here.
06:25So plans to permanently make the move over there.
06:30And I leave in a week.
06:33You leave in a week.
06:34You leave in a week.
06:37And mom and dad do not know.
06:39So.
06:40I mean, you got to tell them.
06:42Yes, I'm going to be telling them tomorrow.
06:46So I'm guessing you're quitting?
06:52Yeah.
06:54He told his brother and his sister-in-law
06:56that he doesn't want to have kids.
06:58And they're concerned that might affect things
07:00even more with Natalia.
07:02I'm just trying to show her that I'm
07:03willing to do anything for her out of love for her.
07:06Right, but is children one of them?
07:08Will you give her a child one day?
07:11I don't know.
07:11I can't answer that question.
07:12That's the I can't answer that yet.
07:14I would just hate to see you go through all this work
07:16to get there and establish yourselves.
07:19And then for your relationship to be hurt
07:22because you hadn't told her that you actually
07:23don't want kids one day.
07:25I've seen marriages fail because someone didn't
07:27talk about that soon enough.
07:30Natalia will always be the priority in my life.
07:34I am moving to Indonesia for Tata.
07:37I'm leaving everything behind.
07:39But I know decisions have huge consequences.
07:43If I say I don't want to have children, period,
07:48I'm not sure how Tata will accept that.
07:51That could cause the biggest rift that could
07:53possibly break us apart.
07:55And I can't lose her.
07:59Good luck.