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Short filmTranscript
00:00Once upon a time, there were three little girls who went to the police academy.
00:06Two in Los Angeles.
00:13The other in San Francisco.
00:16And they were each assigned very hazardous duties.
00:22But I took them away from all that.
00:25And now they work for me.
00:27My name is Charlie.
01:00And I'm Charlie.
01:02And I'm Charlie.
01:04And I'm Charlie.
01:06And I'm Charlie.
01:08And I'm Charlie.
01:10And I'm Charlie.
01:12And I'm Charlie.
01:14And I'm Charlie.
01:16And I'm Charlie.
01:18And I'm Charlie.
01:20And I'm Charlie.
01:22And I'm Charlie.
01:24And I'm Charlie.
01:26And I'm Charlie.
01:28And I'm Charlie.
01:30And I'm Charlie.
01:42Getting?
01:58Can I help you?
02:00Oh, Mr. Anderson.
02:02You've got to do something.
02:04There's a murderer aboard this ship.
02:06You've seen someone killed?
02:08No, no, no. It was in Philadelphia.
02:10I'm sorry. I don't seem to be able to follow you.
02:13Listen, please.
02:15My name is Lisa Blake.
02:17I'm from Philadelphia.
02:19That man's picture was in the newspaper.
02:22I'm sure you know who he is.
02:24I'm from Philadelphia.
02:26That man's picture was in the newspaper there.
02:29And on television.
02:31He murdered his wife.
02:35His name's Thatcher.
02:38And you've seen him aboard this ship?
02:40He's in the state room across from mine.
02:43J... J-142, I think.
02:47All right. Please, come with me.
02:49It'll be all right.
02:55Come on.
03:01There's a Mr. Cardinos registered in this state room.
03:04His name is Thatcher. His picture was in all the papers.
03:14Are you sure?
03:16Please believe me. You've got to do something.
03:19All right. Now go back to your cabin, lock your door.
03:22Okay, Captain Bruner.
03:28Don't worry. I'll be right back.
03:30Thank you.
03:49Who is it?
03:51Ma'am, the purser sent me.
03:57You forgot your murder mystery.
04:07They tried to make it look like an accident, but I'm sure it was murder.
04:11Her name was Lisa Blake.
04:14Only 23 years old she was.
04:17And the story that she told the purser was true, Captain Jack.
04:21That's right, Chris.
04:23The man Lisa identified escaped on his way to prison outside Philadelphia.
04:27And he's vanished, too.
04:29He probably left the ship when it reached Brazil.
04:31Uh-huh. He isn't the first criminal to skip the country in the past few months.
04:35Authorities are certain that somebody is helping them.
04:38And now it looks like they're using my ship, the Southern Queen,
04:41as the base for their filthy operations.
04:43I'd like to get my hands on them.
04:45You have any idea who they might be?
04:49Well, on two occasions,
04:51the trail led to a bar in L.A.
04:54named Shanghai Shanny.
04:58But the trail went cold there.
05:01There is a steward, though, aboard the Southern Queen
05:04by the name of Leo Sanchez.
05:07And he has a criminal record of his own.
05:10Guess where he spends most of his time when he's in port.
05:13The Shanghai Shanny.
05:15Hmm.
05:17And I'll bet there's a reason that he hasn't been picked up yet.
05:20Right again. Leo has just hired help.
05:23I'm sure he's working for someone else aboard the ship.
05:27So, angels, you're taking a cruise on the Southern Queen.
05:31Now, the captain is James Brunner.
05:34He won't know your real identity, so you're on your own.
05:37Your assignment is to find out who is running the operation
05:41and to break it up.
05:43So we'll all need to have a cover.
05:45But one of you will have to be a wanted criminal,
05:49tough, streetwise,
05:52and capable of anything.
05:57Wait a minute!
06:02Why are you looking at me?
06:06Oh!
06:16Hey, Leo. Mind if I sit down?
06:19Hey, come on, honey, get lost.
06:21Hey, look, I traveled 3,000 miles to talk to you.
06:23I've been sleeping in barns and eating bananas.
06:25Now, you gotta listen to me.
06:27I'm listening.
06:29Okay. My name is Sabrina Lampone.
06:31Lampone?
06:33That's right. Uncle Vito is my uncle.
06:35Uh, you did some time with him up at the queue.
06:38Now, do I look like an uncle to you?
06:40No.
06:42You did some time with him up at the queue.
06:44Now, do I?
06:46Oh, please, come on. I don't have time for this.
06:48I'm in a lot of trouble back in New York.
06:50What kind of trouble?
06:51Well, the kind that don't get fixed so easy.
06:53You see, there was this union pension plan that I was in charge of
06:55and a lot of money, and it was missing.
06:56I don't know how it got lost.
06:58Anyway, Uncle Vito thought that maybe it would be a little more healthier for me
07:01if I left there, being as such I'm a delicate girl, you know.
07:04What's that got to do with me?
07:06Well, Uncle Vito thought that I could use a little vacation.
07:09You know what I mean? Get a little rest.
07:11He highly recommended your travel agency.
07:15He did?
07:17Yeah, he did.
07:18I hear Rio is real lovely this time of the year.
07:21Just the place for somebody trying to get away from it all.
07:24Yeah, like me.
07:26Overhead is really way up.
07:28How much?
07:29Oh, we got to get you some traveling clothes and a passport.
07:33Okay, yeah, look, you don't have to worry about the money because I...
07:36Well, you know, I recently came into a whole lot of cash.
07:40Yeah.
07:41What you got in there?
07:42Just my dirty clothes, that's all.
07:44Look, you don't have to worry about it.
07:46You will get your money, okay?
07:48Okay, I got the check first.
07:50It should be okay.
07:53It's going to cost you $50,000.
07:55Cash up front.
07:57$50,000?
07:59Very steep.
08:01Honey, this is a deluxe store.
08:04Okay, I got about $10,000 in here.
08:08Uncle Vito will be very, very appreciative.
08:11What name do you want on your passport?
08:13Duncan.
08:14I'll use my first name, Sabrina, and I'll use Duncan.
08:16Sabrina Duncan.
08:18Sounds good.
08:19Now listen.
08:21Listen carefully.
08:22Southern Queen sales Friday morning at 7.
08:26Southern Queen at 7.
08:28Be on time.
08:30For sure.
08:31Okay, look, I'm going to get out of here now,
08:34and I just want to tell you how much I appreciate it,
08:36and thanks a lot for lunch.
08:46Leo's not the head man there.
08:48There's somebody else in charge.
08:50Well, I'll tell you this.
08:51If he does any checking, Charlie has fixed it.
08:53So he will find rumors of a big pension swindle
08:56circulating in the New York underworld,
08:58and the name Lampone will figure prominently.
09:01And also, Captain McGuire has pulled a few strings.
09:04Oh, well, it is my pleasure.
09:06They'll no longer let me weigh anchor,
09:08but they will still allow me to pull a few strings.
09:11How do you like my new activities director?
09:13She'll be ready.
09:15She'll also have shoulders like Joan Crawford if she keeps this up.
09:18That was a dress.
09:20Just exactly what will she be directing, Captain?
09:22Well, since we call this our swinging singles cruise,
09:27you can take it from there.
09:30Oh, wow, that's very interesting.
09:32Ah, Bosley will love the swinging singles cruise.
09:35Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
09:37That is if he gets a new tie.
09:39New tie?
09:40Yes, Bosley.
09:42Not polka dots.
09:44You see, you want to look sharp.
09:46What's the matter with polka dots?
09:48Well, I guess there's nothing more for me to do
09:52but to wish you all good luck and bon voyage.
09:57I really like polka dots.
09:59Oh, Bosley.
10:01Very sharp.
10:10Hello, Duncan, Miss S. Duncan.
10:14Oh, hello, I'm Kelly Garrett, your activities director.
10:17Oh, activities director. Well, you look very nice.
10:20Uh, Miss Duncan, you're in stateroom F139.
10:23Yeah.
10:24Miss Stewart will show you the way.
10:25Ah, Stewart, great, great. Which way?
10:27This way, please.
10:28Oh, this way? Great.
10:31I'm going in.
10:38Sunstroke.
10:40I beg your pardon?
10:41Sunstroke.
10:42Did you see that complexion?
10:44Keep an eye on him.
10:46Okay.
10:48Oh, Kelly, this is Doc Harris, the ship's doctor.
10:50He's a good man to know.
10:52Hi.
10:53I'm a good man to know if you like gin.
10:55We can either play it or drink it.
10:57It's your choice.
10:58How about some free medical advice?
11:00Oh, sure, any time.
11:02It'll be worth the price, too.
11:05Heart palpitations.
11:08See that hypertension?
11:09I keep a mental list of all my potential patients.
11:13Well, with any luck, she'll have her breakdown after we get her home.
11:17Do you detect any signs of stress in me, Doctor?
11:20Oh, no, you're fine.
11:22But when you're around, I have a few problems.
11:25I like this crew, don't you, Ben?
11:27I wish they all looked like that.
11:29Visit my dispensary any time.
11:31Okay.
11:33Kelly, you better get to your desk.
11:35The sports nuns will be lining up for equipment even as we speak.
11:37Okay, I'll see you later.
11:48Welcome to the Southern Queen.
11:51Forget the queen, honey.
11:55Where's the king?
11:59Oh.
12:25Are you all right?
12:26Yes, I think so. Thank you.
12:28Well, good.
12:29You weren't on my list of potential patients.
12:33I don't understand it.
12:35How could that have fallen?
12:37I don't understand it either.
12:39Doc!
12:42She's all right, Captain.
12:59So I checked with Reed.
13:01And Leo was with her when that equipment fell.
13:04So somebody else cut it loose.
13:06The captain was nearby.
13:09And so was Doc Harris and some others.
13:12Well, nobody's supposed to know who you are.
13:14Something's gone wrong.
13:16I guess so.
13:18It was definitely not an accident.
13:20I don't think so.
13:22I don't think so.
13:24I don't think so.
13:26It was definitely not an accident.
13:28That rope was cut.
13:30I suggest a new game plan, then.
13:32And you be careful.
13:37There's a musician by the name of Mark Carell playing in the lounge.
13:41He was on board when Lisa Blake disappeared.
13:44Okay, I'll check him out right now.
13:57Okay.
14:11No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
14:13Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.
14:15Gentlemen, the first instrument to finish doesn't win a prize.
14:18This is not a race, you see.
14:20Let's try it one more time from the...
14:27Well, forget that. Take a break.
14:38Utopia.
14:40A what?
14:42Utopia.
14:44She was one of the nine muses.
14:46Goddess of music...
14:49and lyric poetry.
14:52You remind me of her.
14:57Let's see.
14:59There you are.
15:01Well, that's terrific.
15:03Thank you.
15:04It's even better than the other one.
15:06The other one? What other one?
15:08You don't remember.
15:10Oh, no, no, no. Sure, I do.
15:12Just give me a second. It'll come.
15:14That's very disappointing, you know.
15:16I saw that you were on the ship and I thought that we could...
15:18Well, we can. We can.
15:20Well, if it wasn't that memorable the first time...
15:22But it was.
15:24You caught me at a bad time.
15:26I'm breaking in a new group over there...
15:29and it's always kind of a pain.
15:31What happened to the L group?
15:33Well, you know, they don't pay that much bread on these cruises.
15:36Once the novelty of being on a ship wears off...
15:38well, you know, they kind of split.
15:41Novelty hasn't worn off for you, though.
15:44No, I like the sea air.
15:46Good.
15:48Maybe it'll refresh your memory.
15:54Hmm.
16:02Oh, right around to the left.
16:04Okay.
16:06Hi. Can I help you?
16:08I wanted to play ping-pong.
16:10Well, you've come to the right spot.
16:12Well, I don't...
16:14I don't have anyone on the ship to play with.
16:16I mean, I don't know anyone.
16:18Oh, well, this is a singles cruise.
16:20You shouldn't have any trouble meeting people.
16:22But everyone is so young.
16:24Oh, hey, don't say yourself short.
16:27You look terrific.
16:29Oh, thank you.
16:31I wasn't sure what to wear.
16:33Oh, this is your first cruise?
16:35It's my first everything for a long time.
16:38You see, I, um...
16:41well, I lost my husband just last year.
16:44I guess I'm a little out of practice.
16:47Well, let's see what we can do about that.
16:49What is your name?
16:51Oh, Joan. Joan Sayers.
16:53Joan, you're about to have
16:55the greatest ping-pong game of your life.
16:57Come on. Let's go over here a minute.
16:59Mr. Bosley?
17:01Oh, yes. Thanks. You're welcome.
17:03Uh, John Bosley, Joan Sayers.
17:05Oh, how do you do?
17:07Hello, Mr. Bosley.
17:09I'm afraid we don't have a golf course on board.
17:12How's your ping-pong?
17:14Oh, well, pretty good.
17:16As a matter of fact, my freshman year in college,
17:19I was known as the Sultan of Slam.
17:21It's all in the wrist.
17:23I'm afraid I'm really not very good.
17:26Oh, don't worry about that.
17:28It'd be my pleasure. I'd love to teach you.
17:31Well, thank you. Thank you.
17:45Okay, now try and look to find...
17:48Oh, come on. You know what I mean.
17:50Hey, wait a minute.
17:52Sabrina Lampone made of chewed gum.
17:54But Sabrina Duncan doesn't, right?
17:57I put up my roof on my mouth.
18:01Okay.
18:15Oh!
18:1721-4. My game again, I think.
18:20That's right.
18:22You know, John, I find ping-pong very exhilarating, don't you?
18:26Oh, yes. Very exhilarating.
18:28As a matter of fact, so much so that I would love a cold drink.
18:31How about you?
18:33Oh, one more quick game, huh?
18:35No, no, no. Not until I recharge my batteries.
18:37All right. Thank you.
18:39I would love a drink.
18:41Say, tell me, was your husband an athlete?
18:44Les? Oh, Les was a deer, but he hated to lose.
18:49Oh, well, Joan, I will be happy to lose to you anytime.
18:53Thank you very much.
19:05Miss Garrett? We haven't met. I'm Captain Brunner.
19:09You run a beautiful ship, Captain.
19:11Yes, well, I've always thought so.
19:13Is something the matter?
19:15You know, I've been skipper of the Southern Queen for over a year now.
19:19And my ability to command has never been questioned before.
19:22Well, I don't understand.
19:24Jack McGuire should have come to me first, before he hired a detective.
19:28What did he tell you?
19:30You're here to investigate Lisa Blake's death.
19:33Now, I had it in my report.
19:35The girl was hysterical and confused.
19:37Her death was very sad, but it was an accident.
19:41There seem to be a lot of accidents on this ship.
19:45A piece of heavy equipment almost fell on me, Captain.
19:48Accidents happen to people who are accident-prone, Miss Garrett.
19:52That woman's death had nothing whatsoever to do with me or my ship.
19:56I see.
20:08Last party, everybody.
20:21Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. We're going to take a short break.
20:24Be back in about 15. Thank you.
20:38Hi.
20:40Hi.
20:41Want a drink?
20:43I have one, thank you.
20:45Have another.
20:50For old times' sake.
20:53You remember?
20:55Of course. I never forgot.
20:59You knew that.
21:02The little bar at the end of the pier?
21:05Right.
21:08And then it rained.
21:11It was beautiful.
21:14Where was it?
21:16Tip Top Club, Saginaw, right?
21:20Wrong.
21:31Where?
21:38Kelly?
21:39Oh, hi.
21:45Hey, you don't have to do that. One of the deck crew will take care of those.
21:48Your job is fun and games, remember?
21:50Fun and games, huh? Would you please tell my feet that?
21:53Oh, here. Somebody left this at the desk for you.
21:56Bet it's your first fan letter.
21:58Or, uh, maybe a marriage proposal?
22:01I don't think so.
22:02Bet it's your first fan letter. Or, uh, maybe a marriage proposal?
22:09It's a proposal, all right. I'm not sure marriage goes along with it.
22:14Yeah, I'll bet you get a lot of those.
22:18How long have you been aboard the Queen, Ben?
22:21Her Majesty and I have been acquainted for eight months.
22:26Do you like it? One crisis after another?
22:29That's not bad. A big crisis is usually a severe case of sunburn.
22:35But somebody told me a passenger on the last voyage fell overboard.
22:39A young woman.
22:40Told you that?
22:43Well, is it true? Did she?
22:46Yeah.
22:49Look, Kelly, I don't know who told you that.
22:52But Captain Brunner has given all of us strict orders not to talk about it.
22:56So you'd better just stick to fun and games. Okay?
22:59Okay.
23:00Well, I'm still short costumes for the party tomorrow night.
23:04So I'll see you later.
23:05Yeah.
23:06Yeah.
23:25Pretty girl, huh?
23:28Trying to make time, Ben?
23:30No.
23:32I'm trying to find out why she's really aboard this ship.
23:37Hmm.
23:50Hi.
23:51Hi.
23:52Someone just sent me this.
23:55Lisa Blake did not fall overboard accidentally.
23:58We're in the room nine o'clock.
24:00It could be one of the crew. They've been ordered not to talk by Captain Brunner.
24:04It could also be a trap.
24:06I know. I'll be careful.
24:36Shit.
25:06Fuck.
25:36Fuck.
26:07Fuck.
26:21It's already past nine. Kelly ought to be back by now.
26:24Listen, if anybody stops us, we'll just say we're lost. Come on.
26:36Come on.
26:55I'll get an extinguisher.
26:57Kelly!
27:06Come on.
27:22Kelly!
27:23Come on. I'll put this around you.
27:25Okay. Ready? Hold on to me.
27:27Let's go.
27:30Come on.
27:34You okay?
27:36Come on.
28:04Hi.
28:05Uh-oh. What happened?
28:06It's okay.
28:07Somebody tried to burn Kelly up in the boiler room.
28:09You all right?
28:10Yeah.
28:11It was a setup.
28:12Somebody poured fuel oil all over the floor.
28:15Who gave you that note?
28:16Ben Anderson.
28:18You know, this place is crawling with suspects.
28:20Now, they just took my passport photo on the ship,
28:22so that means the photographer's in on it, too.
28:25You know what? Mark Carell is a terrific artist.
28:27He does all these nice little detailed sketches.
28:30He could be doing the passport jobs.
28:32You think he can get a look around his cabin?
28:34I don't think that's going to be a problem.
28:36The problem is, somebody's trying to kill Kelly,
28:38and we've got to break this thing open and fast.
28:40Yeah, Buzz is right, and I think maybe it's up to me.
28:43What are you going to do?
28:44I don't know. Stir up a little trouble, see what happens.
28:52This is not safe.
28:53I told you I would contact you.
28:56Now, here's your passport.
28:58Oh, yeah, look, a lot of good that's going to do me
29:00if there are cops crawling all over this boat by the time we get to Rio.
29:02Cops? What are you talking about?
29:04Somebody tried to kill the activities director last night.
29:07Yeah? Well, I didn't hear anything about that.
29:10Oh, yeah? Well, you're the only one on the boat that didn't.
29:12Look, if it hadn't been for two passengers found her, she'd be dead right now.
29:15Now, I want to know, is she a cop or what?
29:16How do I know?
29:17Look, Leo, I'm paying you a lot of money to get away from the law,
29:20and you're going to put me right in the middle of a murder case.
29:24I tell you what, I don't trust you anymore, okay?
29:26Now, I don't deal with people that I don't trust.
29:28Now, Uncle Vito told me you go to the top man.
29:30Well, you're not bright enough and you're not tough enough to be the top man,
29:33so what I want you to do, you tell me who he is right now,
29:35because I got to talk to him, all right?
29:37He doesn't do that.
29:38Now, you listen.
29:40You back out on our deal, and maybe you'll never get off this boat.
29:45Don't you threaten me, because the Lampone family has your name, okay?
29:48Anything happens to me, you're in hot water up to here.
29:51I tell you what, Leo, you tell the top man I want to talk to him.
29:53Real soon.
29:55Okay, Leo?
30:00Okay.
30:10My first husband, Ernest, taught me how to shoot.
30:12Pull!
30:17Pull!
30:22Hey!
30:31Hi, Doc. You want to check out a costume for tonight?
30:34No, I don't need a costume, my dear.
30:36I pretend to be sober. That's my guise.
30:39What about you? No chance for Lady Godiva, I guess.
30:42No, I wouldn't count on it.
30:44I hear you had a little scare in the boiler room.
30:46Oh? Who told you that?
30:48Ben Anderson.
30:50I think he's got his eye on you, and you be careful.
30:53I'm very jealous.
30:55Hey.
30:56Let me take a look at that wrist.
30:58Oh, it's nothing, really. It's fine.
31:02What are you doing in the boiler room, anyway?
31:04Are you, uh, mechanically inclined?
31:08No. Just nosy.
31:11No, I think you'd leave.
31:13Take two aspirins, come to my room at midnight.
31:19Hi, Doc.
31:22Well, do you have any pirates left?
31:25Yes, our last one.
31:29Ah, I like that.
31:32Ah, you're a good-looking one, let's see.
31:37John, I am having such a good time, I would be shipwrecked with you any day.
31:42Thanks.
31:58Hi.
32:28Shh.
32:30Shh.
32:31Shh.
32:33Shh.
32:34Shh.
32:35Shh.
32:36Shh.
32:37Shh.
32:38Shh.
32:39Shh.
32:56Where's that cabinet girl?
32:58I don't know where she is.
32:59Well, you'd better find her.
33:03I'm telling you, he's here.
33:05Angry.
33:06Why?
33:07Why do we have to kill her?
33:11He wants her dead, that's why.
33:15I don't like it.
33:17Why do we have to kill her?
33:19Why can't we just split when we hit port?
33:21Oh, sure, just run, that's real easy.
33:24Well, I don't like us killing people, especially broads.
33:27And that was never part of the deal when we started out.
33:29Oh, well, lover boy, I got news for you.
33:32This Garrett broad, she is a detective.
33:36A detective?
33:37Yeah, now you think about that.
33:38Terrific.
33:39Oh, you can run all you want.
33:40But if they make a case, they're going to find you sooner or later.
33:44I am, I am, I am.
33:45Okay, okay.
33:49But I don't have the light, right?
33:59♪
34:30Joan, may I ask you a personal question?
34:33Of course.
34:35Well, you've told me about Lester and Ernest.
34:39Well, how many times have you been married?
34:43Four.
34:46You never married, John?
34:48No.
34:49Never wanted to?
34:52Not for quite a while.
34:54Lately...
34:56Well, lately, I find I just don't have much time for myself.
35:00I mean, I have friends.
35:02But I guess you could say I'm just much more married to my work.
35:06What a shame.
35:08None of my husbands were perfect,
35:10but each one of them gave me something I needed.
35:15Don't you miss having someone to come home to?
35:19Well, I guess I haven't really thought about it much.
35:24Mm-hmm.
35:43Brie, looks like Bosley's having himself a little romance on the high seas.
35:50Brie, listen, I can't find Kevin.
35:52Brie, listen, I can't find Kelly.
35:54I overheard Correll and Leo.
35:56They plan on killing her tonight.
35:58All right, I'll go out the back way and meet you in Bosley's room. Hurry.
36:01Okay.
36:17Joan, look, I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to leave for a little while.
36:20Leave? Why?
36:21Well, because, uh, well, I'm not gonna lie to you.
36:24It's a business matter, and I just have to take care of it.
36:26It's rather confidential.
36:27But I promise she'll be back just as soon as I can.
36:30Will you trust me?
36:31Of course.
36:35Then Correll is the one that's forging the passports.
36:37Absolutely. His whole stateroom is a printing shop.
36:39Okay, we know there are four people involved.
36:41There's Leo, Correll, the photographer, and whoever's running the whole operation.
36:45Where is Kelly?
36:46Where is she? I'm really getting worried.
36:48I've taken care of it. I talked to a steward.
36:50I'm going to send up the activities director immediately because my costume didn't fit.
36:56Hi.
36:58Who are you?
37:00The activities director.
37:02Aren't you coming to the masquerade?
37:07Well, what, uh, what happened to the old one?
37:10I guess she quit.
37:13What did you want me for, anyway?
37:17Would you like to see my buried treasure?
37:20No wonder she quit.
37:23What is going on? Where's Kelly?
37:26I don't know. We better go look for her.
37:28Okay, look, we got five decks to search. Now, let's just stay cool about it, all right?
37:31We need to find, uh, Leo and Correll.
37:33Okay, that's a good idea.
37:35Wait a minute, wait a minute, though. Everybody's in costume.
37:37Okay, wait a minute. Kelly told me what everybody would be wearing.
37:40Uh, let's see. Leo's a cowboy and Correll is Don Juan.
37:44And the captain is, um, Rip Van Winkle.
37:47Okay.
37:49Rip Van Winkle, Correll.
37:52Correll is Don Juan?
38:19Can I just get a picture with you?
38:24Can I just get a picture with you?
38:34Can I just get a picture with you?
38:39Can I just get a picture with you?
38:49Can I just get a picture with you?
39:00My brother is, uh, Correll is, uh, Don Juan.
39:07Where is Correll, Rip Van Winkle?
39:10Uh, and Leo is, uh, uh, Leo is the, uh, cowgirl, uh, cowboy.
39:17Where is it?
39:25Just stay put.
39:28Who is it?
39:29Leo, Leo, come on, open up.
39:32He wants to see her. He's at the pool deck waiting.
39:34All right, well, just take her, take her. I gotta get back on the bandstand.
39:37He wants everybody there.
39:40Shut up, Leo.
39:43Who is it?
39:44Who is it?
39:45Utopia.
39:49Hi.
39:50Hi.
39:51How's your memory tonight?
39:52Look, I don't really have time to play memory games tonight. I'm kind of busy.
39:55Oh, you got company?
39:57No, no, I just, uh, you know, have to finish dressing, go to work, pound the old piano keys.
40:01How about I meet you later at the bar when I'm finished, huh?
40:03For old time's sake?
40:05Yeah, for old time's sake. See you later?
40:08Hmm, maybe.
40:15Hi.
40:21Excuse me, excuse me.
40:25Bosley!
40:26Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were somebody else.
40:28What's the matter? Where is it?
40:30Bosley, come here, I think I found Kelly.
40:31Where?
40:34Come get me.
40:35Move out.
40:38This thing is giving me a heck of a headache.
40:45They were just here a minute ago.
40:47Come on, they couldn't have gone far.
40:55Remember, honey, this gun is for real.
41:14There she is.
41:34There she is.
41:38I hate to tell you this, my dear.
41:44Doc.
41:47I don't understand.
41:49You have a terminal case of nosiness.
41:53So you might consider what I have to do a mercy killing.
41:58Why?
41:59Why do I find myself in this awkward position?
42:04My motive was dreary and unexceptional.
42:07Greed.
42:08I have to retire.
42:10All these glistening bodies lying about the pool.
42:13Gleaming like sardines.
42:15Why the should they live in indolent luxury
42:17while I end up with little more than varicose veins?
42:21How did you know it was me?
42:22Captain Brunner told me.
42:25He trusts me like a brother.
42:27He's a very good man, but he's a little slow.
42:30You'll never get away with this.
42:32No one's gonna believe another accident.
42:34Oh, no? You don't think so?
42:37Try this for some taste.
42:39Our lovely young activities director
42:41has too much to drink.
42:43Falls into the pool.
42:46Because of her inebriated condition,
42:49poor thing drowns.
42:51In spite of the best efforts of five eyewitnesses.
42:55Well, let's make that six.
42:58Go get that lame pony girl.
43:02We'll make her a part of this and we'll own her.
43:10Oh, watch it.
43:11All right, Brunner is Don Juan and...
43:14No.
43:15Oh, no, no, he's Rip Van Winkle.
43:17Right.
43:18And what's his name?
43:19Carell.
43:20Carell, Carell is Don Juan.
43:21Okay, you got it, Bosley?
43:22Yeah, yeah.
43:23I think so.
43:37Leo!
43:38Leo!
43:40Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's me.
43:42Listen, the man wants to see you.
43:44But he wants a favor.
43:46We got to get rid of that broad that you were worried about.
43:49You were right.
43:51She is a detective.
43:53And he wants you to be part of the cover.
43:56Okay, where are they?
43:57Full deck. Come on, let's go.
43:59Shh, Leo.
44:00What?
44:01Look straight ahead, don't look at me.
44:03How do you know she's working alone?
44:04How do you know there's not someone working with her?
44:07Oh.
44:18Where is that imbecile?
44:20Well, my dear, we might as well get started.
44:31Carell, we'll get that.
44:36Oh!
44:39Oh!
44:43Oh!
44:46Oh!
44:50Oh!
44:59Oh!
45:04Oh!
45:07Oh!
45:17Hold it, Leo.
45:18Bosby, is that you?
45:19Sabrina.
45:20Hey, freeze! Where's Leo?
45:21I'm in the freezer.
45:22Come on.
45:23Huh?
45:26Oh!
45:27Oh!
45:32Medical science is in the vessel.
45:34By how long some people can hold their breath in the water.
45:40Oh!
45:41Oh!
45:43Oh!
45:45Oh!
45:48Oh!
45:52Oh!
45:57Oh!
45:59Oh!
46:00Well, what happened?
46:01Where's the lampooning girl?
46:03Oh!
46:04What is this?
46:05I guess you got me confused with somebody else.
46:11Hey!
46:19Bosley!
46:24Let's go.
46:26Go on, go on.
46:30I'll take that.
46:31No, John, please.
46:40I'm sorry.
46:46Have you two been introduced?
46:48Meet Joan Kendall.
46:50She buried four husbands before the cops caught on.
46:56I'm transporting her to South America for a fat fee.
47:01I thought of marrying her myself.
47:03I always like to live dangerously.
47:08No.
47:10I'm sorry.
47:12What I don't understand is why Doc Harris got mixed up in something so rotten.
47:18Well, maybe giving all those sugar pills to all those dowagers drove him a little bonkers.
47:22Yeah, and the good doctor was real happy to talk about his little set-up.
47:26Thanks to that ego, the police are hot on the trail of Thatcher.
47:30I don't know what he's up to.
47:32I don't know what he's up to.
47:33I don't know what he's up to.
47:34I don't know what he's up to.
47:35I don't know what he's up to.
47:36I don't know what he's up to.
47:37I don't know what he's up to.
47:38Thanks to that ego, the police are hot on the trail of Thatcher and all the other fugitives he's helped to escape.
47:44Good job, angels.
47:45Bosley?
47:47Thanks, Charlie.
47:49Boz, I'm sorry about Joan.
47:52We all are, you know.
47:54But four husbands?
47:57Yeah.
47:59Well, I guess she ping-ponged them all to death.
48:06Now that's our Bosley.
48:08Now that that case is closed, I'd like to discuss another one.
48:11Sorry, Charlie, we can't.
48:13I don't understand.
48:14We have a lunch date, a very important one.
48:16That's right, we're gonna cheer up an old friend.
48:18Bosley, Charlie, I'm being kidnapped.
48:20But don't try to save me.
48:35THE END