Windy Channel
  • 7 months ago
Transcript
00:00:00Neighbors bring food with death, and flowers with sickness, and little things in between.
00:00:19Boo was our neighbor.
00:00:22He gave us two soaked dolls, a broken watch and chain, a knife, and our lives.
00:01:53So what's the deal? Mom didn't believe in lampshades?
00:01:57Give her a break, Jeff. She was really sick before she died.
00:02:11Your mom really lived like this?
00:02:13What do we say? Her money was in the toilet.
00:02:16Come on, Alex. This place means a lot to me.
00:02:19Hey, I need to make a little speech.
00:02:21Ugh, not that.
00:02:23What's that?
00:02:24Mom always used to do that.
00:02:26She used to make these speeches every time we had a visitor,
00:02:28and she wouldn't let them leave until she made a speech either.
00:02:31My dear friends.
00:02:32Christ.
00:02:33Tonight, we are gathered in Mom's old house.
00:02:37I know this is probably weird for you boys, being a stranger's house and all,
00:02:41and it's kind of a stranger's house to me too.
00:02:46And I bet for Alex.
00:02:48But we'll be selling this place soon, so for tonight, just one night, it can be a home again.
00:02:55I don't know why I feel weird tonight.
00:02:58Sober and tipsy, I guess.
00:03:01I miss Mom a little, and this is her place of routine and care and love.
00:03:08So we're here.
00:03:12So it'll work then.
00:03:14Are you sure that was necessary?
00:03:16If you miss her so much, that'd probably upset you.
00:03:18Nope.
00:03:20Ugh, it's hot in here.
00:03:23Right, so can we eat now? Because I'm getting the Dolman Crunches.
00:03:27What?
00:03:28You know, when you get hungry and you've got that grinding in your abdomen?
00:03:31That's what this is. Dolman Crunches.
00:03:34Is it really that hard to just say abdomen?
00:03:37Is it really that hard to just say abdomen?
00:03:40Dolman saves time. Everybody knows what a dolman is.
00:03:51Man, this is a guy's apartment.
00:03:58TGI Friday's quesadillas and White Castle cheeseburgers.
00:04:05Sounds just like her.
00:04:07Mama's always one of the guys, and she loved those dillas.
00:04:11Dillas?
00:04:12Quesadillas?
00:04:14If she can say dillas, I can say dolman.
00:04:17Enough. You guys can eat the junk food.
00:04:20I'm going to go to the car and get my groceries and make some gazpacho.
00:04:35Water
00:04:58All right.
00:05:06Guys, shouldn't we pray before we eat?
00:05:09No.
00:05:11Come on, guys. Mom just died.
00:05:14Steph, you can do one of those little silent prayers.
00:05:18Amen, then?
00:05:20You guys are missing out on this gazpacho.
00:05:22Oh my God, I love White Castle.
00:05:25So good for my dolman.
00:05:28Amen, then?
00:05:38You guys are missing out on this gazpacho.
00:05:40Oh my god, I love White Castle.
00:05:43So good for my dohmen.
00:05:50So Bruce, we haven't really met.
00:05:52No.
00:05:53How long have you been dating my sister?
00:05:55I don't know, about a hundred years.
00:05:59He means five months.
00:06:01Guys never remember anniversaries.
00:06:02How'd you guys meet?
00:06:03Online.
00:06:04My boss, Julia, is always telling me how she loves the online world.
00:06:11I guess it really does work.
00:06:14So what do you do?
00:06:15Well, I work at the Mara Inn with Jeff.
00:06:18What's that?
00:06:19It's a small hotel.
00:06:20I'd really rather not talk about work right now.
00:06:23I didn't really ask you, but incidentally, what are you doing here?
00:06:27Well, Stephanie told me to bring as many people as I could to help pack up this place.
00:06:32I'm glad I came.
00:06:33What with the White Castle stuff and all.
00:06:35How do you two know each other?
00:06:38From our days in the old schoolyard.
00:06:41Aw, old friends.
00:06:43Do you have a girlfriend, Jeff?
00:06:48Yeah, still working on that one.
00:06:52Praise the Holy Grail, I guess.
00:06:54That's all the answer I needed, thanks.
00:06:57Now, hold on a minute.
00:06:58Jeff had a little issue he had to deal with.
00:07:01Oh?
00:07:02It's okay.
00:07:03I can tell her myself.
00:07:04Look, in college I had this female friend named Laura.
00:07:08One night we thought it would be a great idea to get drunk and have sex.
00:07:13Which we did.
00:07:14And it was terrible.
00:07:16And we didn't even finish.
00:07:19And afterwards we never talked again.
00:07:22Aw, that's a sad story, Jeff.
00:07:25Were you in love with her?
00:07:30Well, uh, I'm sorry you couldn't swoop in and save the day.
00:07:35So, what do you think of my sister?
00:07:39I like her a lot.
00:07:41She's not too religious for you?
00:07:43Hey, I'm really not that bad.
00:07:45She really isn't at all.
00:07:46That's cute.
00:07:48Julia told me she thinks so too.
00:07:50I don't think it's the excess of religion that's her problem.
00:07:53I think it's the bubble she lives in.
00:07:55Alex!
00:07:56You know about the last guy she dated?
00:07:58Yes.
00:07:59Homer.
00:08:00They lived together for a few months.
00:08:02I'm totally all cool with that.
00:08:04Yeah, you're just so mad chill.
00:08:06You know how hard that breakup was for her?
00:08:08She can be a tough plate of raw fish when it comes to her emotions.
00:08:14Why don't we talk about something else?
00:08:16What's up, Jeff?
00:08:18I'm gonna take my pants off.
00:08:25What the hell?
00:08:28You didn't need to change the subject that much.
00:08:30Well, it's a little warm in here and these jeans aren't actually that comfortable,
00:08:34so I'm gonna loosen up a little bit.
00:08:36Yeah, that's really respectful to my mom's memory, just so you know.
00:08:39Well, look who's talking.
00:08:41She's dead and you're drinking champagne.
00:08:43And you're drinking fructose corn syrup.
00:08:45What the hell's the difference?
00:08:47Okay, okay.
00:08:48Let's try to have some fun.
00:08:50We don't have to be so solemn about this whole thing.
00:08:52What do you mean by fun?
00:09:13Yes!
00:09:35I think that was mom punishing us for the dance.
00:09:38Yeah.
00:09:39Maybe we should get rolling.
00:09:41Oh, come on! It was just getting to the chorus!
00:09:44Yeah, but it's almost midnight and some of you have been drinking,
00:09:49so let's just do this before you start falling asleep.
00:09:52Do what, honey? Sorry, but there's no way we're gonna pack up this whole place in one single night.
00:09:57I think you mean looking for the money?
00:10:01Yeah, that's right.
00:10:03Uh, money?
00:10:05Is that why you had us all come here tonight? That's why you wanted guests?
00:10:08What are you guys talking about?
00:10:10I guess I should tell you. Um...
00:10:16I can tell.
00:10:18Mom inherited some bonds from our great-aunt,
00:10:21and when we asked her where she put them, she got really embarrassed and basically...
00:10:27Basically, she cashed the bonds, hid the money in the house,
00:10:31and forgot where she put it, never found it again, lest we heard it was still lost.
00:10:38So that's what we're looking for tonight?
00:10:41Yeah. Look, I told you Mom had a sense of humor.
00:10:45And a bad memory. Deadly combination, those two.
00:10:49But honey, this is silly. You're gonna be selling this place in a few weeks.
00:10:52Just, it'll turn up then.
00:10:53Honey, do you trust moving men? When you move, you don't find things, you lose them.
00:10:59I just want to do this while we still have the place to ourselves.
00:11:03But why do we have to look tonight?
00:11:05I think because she knows I'm leaving for Cali tomorrow.
00:11:08I'll share it with all you guys.
00:11:13Christ, it'd be hard enough to pack up all this stuff, but now we're looking for something?
00:11:18Needle in a haystack.
00:11:20Where do you think it might be?
00:11:22That's a good question, considering she herself didn't know.
00:11:27All right, how long do we have to stay until?
00:11:29As long as you want.
00:11:31Actually, they were closing that street by the highway, remember?
00:11:34Oh yeah, Washington Avenue is closed until 6 a.m. for construction.
00:11:39Did you by any chance have that in mind all along?
00:11:43Maybe, but look, let's just try it out and by 6 a.m. you guys can take off.
00:11:53All right, enough grumbling.
00:11:56There's four of us.
00:11:58Let's just give it a shot.
00:12:34So
00:12:45so
00:13:02Steph, I need a break.
00:13:04Come on, Alex, there's still places to look.
00:13:07Have you ever even seen the money?
00:13:09Nope.
00:13:11We don't even know what we're looking for, and this heat just isn't helping.
00:13:27I think, no yeah, I'm definitely getting tired.
00:13:30Yeah, let's hold on one more hour, because then she's gonna get tired,
00:13:34and she's gonna realize how crazy this is.
00:13:36I can't believe I let you talk me into this, all for your freaking girlfriend.
00:13:40I told you she had a sister.
00:13:41Yeah, you didn't tell me she'd be a bitch though.
00:13:56What's going on?
00:13:58Hold on, let me check.
00:13:59Ow!
00:14:01The street lights are out.
00:14:03God, you cannot tell me there's a blackout right now.
00:14:06Yep, I think you gotta circle that answer.
00:14:09The hell, it's not even bad weather outside.
00:14:11Mom said there was one like this five years ago, probably just at some plant.
00:14:15Did your mom have flashlights?
00:14:16Yep.
00:14:17Oh, damn it!
00:14:31I think this means my flight's gonna be canceled tomorrow.
00:14:48I'm gonna call the airline.
00:14:50If I know anything about the horror genre, and I do, phones will be out.
00:14:59None.
00:15:01And she told me she enjoyed it.
00:15:12She looked right at me, and she said, I like you.
00:15:18You remind me of that guy from YouTube.
00:15:20Jeff, nobody really wants to hear your girl exploits.
00:15:23Speak for yourself, Brucie.
00:15:26I think I should make more coffee.
00:15:28The hell with that, Steph.
00:15:30I don't think the power's coming back on tonight.
00:15:32It might.
00:15:33They have round-the-club people for emergencies like this.
00:15:35Well, whatever.
00:15:37I just think we should go to bed.
00:15:39Uh, I don't know if you guys noticed, but there's only one bed in there,
00:15:42and it's not big enough for all of us, so...
00:15:44No, no, no, no, no.
00:15:46If you two think you're getting the bed because you're the couple,
00:15:48you are wildly mistaken.
00:15:50Guys, wait.
00:15:51Don't you want to look for the money?
00:15:52Scratch that one.
00:15:54Baby, don't be mad.
00:15:55Money would be nice, but we're just not going to find it tonight.
00:15:58Oh, so that's it?
00:16:00You guys are just going to give up after a few minutes?
00:16:03Come on.
00:16:03I told you guys, this is the last chance to really look for the money
00:16:06before we sell the place.
00:16:08Steph, did it ever occur to you that the moving men
00:16:10might need the money more than we do?
00:16:13You've never been generous.
00:16:16Times change.
00:16:18Oh, so you've never been generous?
00:16:20Times change.
00:16:22Oh, so you've seen the light, eh?
00:16:24When's the last time you even spoke to me before Mom died?
00:16:28What?
00:16:29How long?
00:16:31How long's it been?
00:16:33I don't know.
00:16:35Christmas?
00:16:35Then maybe summer before?
00:16:38Exactly.
00:16:39So if you ever took the time to get to know me a little better,
00:16:42you'd know that I'm actually a pretty generous person.
00:16:45Julia always says whenever you lose something,
00:16:47someone probably needs it more than we do.
00:16:49Cute.
00:16:50Well, before you got saved by Julia,
00:16:52I don't really think that was your philosophy.
00:16:54God, all you two ever do is fight.
00:16:57Maybe we should go back to dancing.
00:16:59That's a great way to put somebody's eye out.
00:17:01Let's just go to sleep.
00:17:02Oh, you guys suck.
00:17:04I get the bed.
00:17:06Jeff, don't take this the wrong way,
00:17:08but you're a complete stranger,
00:17:10and you're not sleeping in my mother's bed.
00:17:12I'm perfectly fine just sleeping right here.
00:17:16I'll do that too.
00:17:17If my flight's not canceled,
00:17:20knock on wood,
00:17:22I'll just get my sleep on the plane.
00:17:24Julia always says she gets her best sleep on planes.
00:17:27Goddammit, would you shut up about Julia?
00:17:30It's like you're in love with her.
00:17:35Yeah, I love Julia as a friend.
00:17:42No, wait a minute.
00:17:44You do love her.
00:17:46You have a little crush.
00:17:48In fact, now that I think about it,
00:17:50every time you've been on a trip,
00:17:51it's been with her.
00:17:52I think you'd better drop that.
00:17:53No, I think you should tell me about it.
00:17:56No, no, I just think it's cute that you have a little crush.
00:18:00My life isn't your business, got that?
00:18:03Alex, you're cutting me.
00:18:04Hey, hey, get off my girlfriend.
00:18:09Are you hurt?
00:18:11Her nails stabbed me.
00:18:13This is getting so trippy.
00:18:14Shut up, Jeff.
00:18:16I'm fine, I just...
00:18:22Yeah, she's always been very private about her personal life.
00:18:25I feel like I know her a little better.
00:18:28I'll get you something for that.
00:18:29No, I'll go.
00:18:34This is mom's chemical box.
00:18:36She used to be a chemist back when she studied.
00:18:39So your mom collected chemicals and White Castle cheeseburgers.
00:18:42I do believe we are just scratching the surface of a secret life here.
00:18:46What's in that chemical box?
00:18:48Uh, three things.
00:18:50Alcohol, cough syrup, and liquid ammonia.
00:18:54There's a combination you don't hear every day.
00:18:56Yeah, I must have missed this when I was looking through the bathroom earlier.
00:18:59Did you look through the whole bathroom?
00:19:02Yeah, I'll come back on Monday and help you look.
00:19:05But you're working.
00:19:08I got laid off.
00:19:09What?
00:19:11No, Bruce, don't.
00:19:12And so did Jeff.
00:19:13Oh, God.
00:19:14Jeff...
00:19:17But I don't get it.
00:19:18You were just telling me how much your boss liked you.
00:19:20How you impressed him.
00:19:21I do, but it's a small hotel in the middle of nowhere.
00:19:24So when they got a downsize, they got a downsize.
00:19:26Hey, the boss liked me too.
00:19:27You don't have to brag.
00:19:29Anyway, lowering the overhead meant us.
00:19:31Why didn't you tell me?
00:19:33Because your mom just died and it's been so frustrating.
00:19:35Like, what am I doing?
00:19:37Two years out of college and I've been wasting them.
00:19:39It's one thing to get fired when you mess up.
00:19:42These last four months have been a waste just because their business is bad.
00:19:44Hey, I'm mad too, all right?
00:19:46I invested a lot for those people.
00:19:47I put in days, nights, weekends.
00:19:49All to make ends meet.
00:19:51Now they go and take my ends meet away from me.
00:19:54Which is a really good point.
00:19:57Both of you really need the money right now.
00:19:59And here we are looking for a fortune.
00:20:01Yeah, and we haven't found it yet.
00:20:03What are you saying?
00:20:04I just think it would be something if one of you found it
00:20:08while we weren't looking and ceased to mention it.
00:20:10Ha ha, very funny.
00:20:11You realize the same thing could be said about you.
00:20:14What?
00:20:15You've been out of sight too for the past few minutes.
00:20:18Yeah, but I don't have the same incentive you do.
00:20:20Maybe you wanted to buy your girlfriend something.
00:20:23Zing!
00:20:24Listen, Steph, I'm sorry I hurt you.
00:20:26I overreacted.
00:20:28Great, thanks.
00:20:29Now I'm stuck in a dark apartment after midnight bleeding to death.
00:20:32Quit acting, you'll live.
00:20:34Anyway, anything you say about Julia is fine.
00:20:39My life's your life.
00:20:40Great, so while you two make up, I'm taking the bed.
00:20:49Hold it.
00:20:50She's got a point.
00:20:52What's that?
00:20:53Well, all three of you are out of my sight.
00:20:56Any one of you could have found the money.
00:20:59Steph, I'm sorry, but if you're going to accuse me,
00:21:01then you're really pushing it.
00:21:02How the hell could I have pocketed any money
00:21:04when I've had my pants off for the past 90 minutes?
00:21:07You can strip search me if you like.
00:21:09Okay, okay, look, I'm sorry.
00:21:13I didn't mean to accuse anyone.
00:21:15I should know better.
00:21:16But it did seem odd that the minute the lights went out,
00:21:19the three of you couldn't care less about a big load of cash.
00:21:21All right, okay, you know what we'll do?
00:21:23Because we're all getting really grumpy and tired
00:21:26and annoyed with the heat.
00:21:27I suggest we combat all three by each taking a little shower.
00:21:30And by then, hopefully, the lights will be back up.
00:21:33And you'll see how psyched we can be about the money.
00:21:36Psyched we can be about finding some money.
00:21:39Okay, so while you three do that, I'm taking the bed.
00:21:43Hey, genius, instead of just one of us taking the bed,
00:21:45why don't we all go sleep together?
00:21:47Now that's an idea.
00:21:49I meant by the bed.
00:21:51Okay, while you three work that out,
00:21:54I'm going to take the first shower.
00:22:06I can't take this.
00:22:11I thought you were so sleepy.
00:22:13Yeah, well, it's hard to sleep with all this tension in the room.
00:22:15She's not such a good bed partner, is she?
00:22:18Apparently, neither are you.
00:22:20What was that?
00:22:21Hold on, Alex.
00:22:22Why don't we just talk about this?
00:22:24Talk about what?
00:22:25Did I have a gay crush?
00:22:26Yeah.
00:22:28Does that make you uncomfortable?
00:22:30No.
00:22:30Does talking about it make you uncomfortable?
00:22:33Kinda.
00:22:34This reminds me of a joke.
00:22:36Jeff, is this going to be another one of your stupid gags?
00:22:39No, no, no, no, no.
00:22:40That girl who told me I look like the guy from YouTube, she told me this one.
00:22:43Yeah, she's a regular bull too.
00:22:44Okay, okay.
00:22:47What does a gay cow say?
00:22:52What?
00:22:55Hey.
00:23:00I think you've talked enough.
00:23:01Jeff, that joke didn't even make sense.
00:23:03Because cows eat hay?
00:23:06Yeah, I picked that up.
00:23:12What I don't get is why your cow is a stereotypical gay man.
00:23:15Cows are female.
00:23:17Yeah, but this cow is male.
00:23:21Then it's a bull.
00:23:25No, but in the world of the joke, the cow is male.
00:23:29So the audience of your joke needs to know that you're in some sci-fi fictional world?
00:23:36Um, I said gay cow.
00:23:42Then I assumed it's a lesbian cow.
00:23:45No, the cow is not a lesbian.
00:23:47The cow is gay.
00:23:49See, that is a sentence I never thought I would hear.
00:23:52A woman can be called gay as well.
00:23:55Yes, but when I hear that someone is gay, I associate that with male homosexuality, not female.
00:24:02Why don't you just avoid this whole gender dispute by saying a gay bull?
00:24:06Because bulls don't eat hay.
00:24:09Actually, come to think of it, do cows even eat hay?
00:24:11See, I think that might just be horses.
00:24:13Christ, this joke really backfired on me.
00:24:17Next.
00:24:19I'll go.
00:24:21I'm getting booed off stage here.
00:24:24So, Steph, when you hear a gay cow, what does that make you think of?
00:24:29Did you just call my sister a cow?
00:24:31No, no, no.
00:24:33I know exactly what he's talking about.
00:24:47Okay, would you guys tell your mom to stop haunting this house?
00:24:49Okay, would you guys tell your mom to stop haunting this house?
00:24:54You know, I barely saw mom during Christmas.
00:24:57Yeah, what happened?
00:24:59I don't know.
00:25:00Mother-daughter junk.
00:25:02I guess it'll never get worked out now.
00:25:05And no, it had nothing to do with my crush.
00:25:08Favorite topic of the evening.
00:25:11You know, how she always used to say, I'm so incorrigible.
00:25:17I was incorrigible.
00:25:19I got that from her.
00:25:22In college, I had all these friends, both male and female, don't get any ideas.
00:25:30Remember what I used to do during my breaks?
00:25:34Yeah, you stopped coming home for Christmas or Thanksgiving or whatever,
00:25:39found someone else to spend it with.
00:25:41And it wasn't even anything against mom.
00:25:44I wasn't even mad at her.
00:25:46They were like my family.
00:25:48This is even pre-Julia.
00:25:49This was Doug, Mark, and Mia.
00:25:53Now they're just somewhere.
00:25:55I don't even know where.
00:25:56I think Mark's in Connecticut and Doug's somewhere up north.
00:26:00Yeah, boo-hoo.
00:26:01So you got post-college depression and you miss your friends.
00:26:04So does everybody.
00:26:06There's no reason to leave your family.
00:26:07Chris, don't.
00:26:09No, wait, I deserve that.
00:26:12You've even been nice enough to come out and help your girlfriend through this tough time.
00:26:16And it wasn't even your mom who died.
00:26:20And you've just gotten laid.
00:26:22What?
00:26:24Sorry, I was going to say laid off.
00:26:27And then I stopped at laid and it was funnier.
00:26:32Have you though?
00:26:34What?
00:26:34Slept together?
00:26:36That's an inappropriate question to ask anybody, let alone a family member.
00:26:40Bruce, she knows.
00:26:42I told her on the phone.
00:26:43What?
00:26:44We're girls.
00:26:45We talk about this stuff.
00:26:47I just wanted to see what you'd say.
00:26:50Thanks, genius, for calling me bluff.
00:26:52Oh, you're incorrigible.
00:26:56All right, who's up?
00:26:57I kept it quick.
00:26:58There isn't much hot water.
00:27:00I'll go.
00:27:01So Voltaire's back.
00:27:03Or her boyfriend, I mean.
00:27:04What's wrong with you?
00:27:07What?
00:27:07You're chewing everyone out like you've got something to be defensive about.
00:27:11And please, don't give me another soliloquy about your college friends.
00:27:16I fight back when everyone gangs up on me.
00:27:18And anyway, what was your deal with Mom?
00:27:21Nothing.
00:27:22Perfect daughter.
00:27:23You were always insecure with her.
00:27:26I guess so.
00:27:28She put tons of pressure on both of us, but frankly, it didn't affect me.
00:27:32I wiped my ass of her.
00:27:33Quite well, I might add.
00:27:35But you, you put up with her.
00:27:38She drove your boyfriends away, and that's why you never introduced this one to her.
00:27:43And now, you're perky, because she died.
00:27:46And you want to look for money.
00:27:49Are you done?
00:27:50Guess so.
00:27:51You know, if I believed you, I'd be offended by all the crackpot logic spewing out of you.
00:27:56But I don't, because I know you.
00:27:59And you've always been tough, but you're just as insecure as I am.
00:28:02And you know how to get under my skin.
00:28:05Bravo.
00:28:07You know, I thought we'd do something together this weekend, since we never see each other.
00:28:13Don't worry.
00:28:14I learned my lesson.
00:28:19Boo!
00:28:22You call this a cat fight?
00:28:24What cat fight?
00:28:25You two have been at each other's throats all night.
00:28:27Fight already!
00:28:28We have more class than that.
00:28:30Yeah, we're sisters.
00:28:32We really love each other under all this hostility.
00:28:34Well, we'll see about that.
00:28:37Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
00:28:38All I know is there's a long night ahead of us.
00:28:41And this fight, it's not over.
00:28:44That's for certain.
00:28:46It might not be, but I think I hit the nail right on the head with you, Steph.
00:28:49Well, since you're so critical, what is your advice?
00:28:52My advice to you, and to Jeff, and to Bruce, is get your heads out of the toilet.
00:28:58And realize that life happens.
00:29:01Mothers die, boyfriends get fired, and people drink champagne.
00:29:07Good things happen, and bad things happen.
00:29:09There's no real way life is supposed to be.
00:29:14Thank you for the Ferris Bueller monologue.
00:29:17No, it's true.
00:29:19Maybe I've been a bitch tonight, but out of all of you, I'm the only one happy.
00:29:23Amen.
00:29:31Guess I'm up.
00:29:40She's nuts.
00:29:41What happened?
00:29:43My sister just humiliated me by showing what a complete whack job she is.
00:29:47I thought you said this was gonna be a fun night.
00:29:49Did I say that?
00:29:50Yeah, you did, Bruce.
00:29:52Oh, Jeff, come on over.
00:29:54Help me and my girlfriend move her dead mom's stuff.
00:29:56It'll be totally awesome.
00:29:57We'll spend the whole night just chit-chatting away, eating and drinking and having a good time.
00:30:01It's been a real trip to the funhouse, thanks.
00:30:03Well, I didn't know the lights were gonna go out.
00:30:05Everything was just fine before that happened.
00:30:07That's been the least of tonight's problems.
00:30:09Things change when you're marooned like this in the dark.
00:30:12You change.
00:30:13It's like being in the jungle.
00:30:14This place is about as filthy as the jungle.
00:30:17You think it's the dark that's turning my sister into a bitch?
00:30:20Well, let me give you a good example.
00:30:22Jeff, you may want to cover your ears for this.
00:30:24No, there's no covering ears here.
00:30:26I mean, Alex already humiliated me in front of him.
00:30:29So what humiliating thing could you have to say?
00:30:30Baby, calm down.
00:30:31I'm waiting.
00:30:33Okay, so let's just say this.
00:30:36Would you ever sell your body?
00:30:38No, absolutely not.
00:30:39Okay, but now imagine that you're broke, homeless, whatever, you name it.
00:30:44Now would you?
00:30:46I'm sure plenty of homeless people face that conundrum every day.
00:30:49But would you?
00:30:50No.
00:30:51Would you?
00:30:53Are you kidding?
00:30:54I don't even need to be homeless.
00:30:56The point is, when you're living in the dark, you change.
00:31:00You didn't prove anything.
00:31:02Jeff didn't have any morals to begin with, and I did.
00:31:05Well, you wait a couple more hours in the dark.
00:31:07See if your answer changes.
00:31:11Let's say you're right.
00:31:13What bothers me is the best example you can come up with is one that degrades women.
00:31:18I don't see how it's degrading to women.
00:31:20Would you sell your body to a man?
00:31:24Now you see my point.
00:31:26Okay.
00:31:31Hi, gang.
00:31:32I think we're all awake now.
00:31:33Fantastic.
00:31:34And I am out of here.
00:31:46Where are you going?
00:31:48Face it, Steph.
00:31:49The lights aren't coming back on anytime soon.
00:31:51We're not going to find a treasure chest in all this junk.
00:31:53I don't even want to know what's living in that kitchen,
00:31:56and I'm sick of hanging around here with all this Tennessee Williams stuff.
00:32:03And the fact that your mom is haunting the place right now?
00:32:06Really not helping.
00:32:08Yeah, but you can't go home, though.
00:32:09Remember, Washington Avenue is closed till 6 a.m.
00:32:12I'll get a motel room and get some sleep.
00:32:14You know, honey, that doesn't sound like that bad of an idea.
00:32:16Yeah, but all the motels around here will be part of the blackout, too.
00:32:20I will walk five towns over if I have to.
00:32:22Wait.
00:32:24I know I've been really difficult tonight to all three of you, and I'm sorry.
00:32:28But going out driving in the middle of the night with all the lights out
00:32:30is probably not the best idea.
00:32:32You had plans to come here and stay the night.
00:32:35Let's call a truce.
00:32:39Nope.
00:32:41Wait, she's right.
00:32:43And we owe it to Steph to at least look for this money until 6 a.m.
00:32:47This night's going to put us all in therapy.
00:32:49Look, I don't have a job.
00:32:51And come tomorrow, I have no idea what I'm doing for the rest of my life.
00:32:54I don't want to sound greedy, but, you know, I could use a little money.
00:32:59So I'd prefer if we didn't leave here until we found it.
00:33:01You know, Bruce, when you say that you got fired, you do remind me that I was fired, too.
00:33:09All right.
00:33:10Let's keep searching.
00:33:52All right.
00:33:52Enough putting off the inevitable.
00:33:54What?
00:33:56The books.
00:33:57That's more of a mom thing to hide her things in her books.
00:34:00Knew this was coming.
00:34:51How convenient of your mother to have collected every single book under the sun.
00:35:15It wasn't her fault.
00:35:17Mom had a boyfriend for a while who used to give her books.
00:35:20She used to joke it was a compulsion.
00:35:23So in short, your mother collected books, chemicals, and White Castle cheeseburgers.
00:35:30And dillas.
00:35:31Don't forget my dillas.
00:35:34Well, she did live here for 12 years.
00:35:38It's part of the American experience.
00:35:41Collecting a lot of stuff.
00:35:4312 years?
00:35:44Jeez, that's more than half my life.
00:35:47Let's close the book on that chapter.
00:35:50No pun intended stuff.
00:35:52No, but I mean, this is where I learned to play the cello.
00:35:57And I don't know, that window over there is where I first became religious.
00:36:03A window made you religious?
00:36:13When dawn comes, you'll see what I mean.
00:36:14Christ, here comes another sermon.
00:36:17I mean, it's not like it happened one day and I got saved, but
00:36:21just years and years of walking by this window every morning when the light shines in.
00:36:29Little rays, you know?
00:36:31Beams.
00:36:33Golden beams, like someone wants to shine in on you.
00:36:36It made me wonder why we had day and night and green and brown and leaves on the trees and the smell.
00:36:48Just a sweet, wild, and lonely smell that just gets in your mind.
00:36:56Made me want to climb mountains.
00:36:58Made me want to climb mountains.
00:37:03Well, when dawn comes, you'll see what I mean.
00:37:12That's not really being religious, Seth.
00:37:15What?
00:37:17You had a quasi-mystical response to nature.
00:37:21I've had that too.
00:37:23It makes you wonder what life's about, why you're here.
00:37:27You just don't understand.
00:37:29No, I do.
00:37:30Do you know what nirvana is?
00:37:34And yes, rest in peace, Cobain.
00:37:36That's not the nirvana I'm referring to.
00:37:38I mean the nirvana in Buddhism.
00:37:41I'm not Buddhist.
00:37:43It's a state of not wanting anything.
00:37:45Complete bliss.
00:37:46You had your nirvana.
00:37:48Yeah, I heard there's like two sects of Buddhism, right?
00:37:51Yeah, I studied all this in college.
00:37:53The first one sees Buddha sort of as a teacher, someone to follow.
00:37:57And the other one more as a god, someone to worship.
00:38:00I mean, people just really like having gods.
00:38:03You just haven't experienced what I have.
00:38:06Oh, yeah.
00:38:06You've testified to the Holy Spirit.
00:38:09Very much.
00:38:10Yeah, so tell me this.
00:38:12Why are you having sex with your boyfriend over here?
00:38:14But you're just a harpy about sex, aren't you?
00:38:18No, no.
00:38:19I'm cool.
00:38:19I'm real cool.
00:38:21All right, all right, all right.
00:38:22How about this?
00:38:23How about no more repressed hostility?
00:38:26From now on, why don't we all just speak openly?
00:38:28Yeah, if somebody asks you a question about sex, you just answer it.
00:38:31That's not exactly what I meant.
00:38:34No, I'll answer your question, Alex.
00:38:37Making love can be very romantic.
00:38:39And I happen to be in love with Bruce.
00:38:42Yeah, adorable, but from a dogmatic point of view?
00:38:46Yes, you're right.
00:38:47Lust is considered wrong, but I disagree with that.
00:38:50It's unrealistic to tell a couple not to have sex.
00:38:53I mean, we've all been in serious relationships, right?
00:38:57You just...
00:38:58That has nothing to do with what I experienced by the window.
00:39:01Exactly.
00:39:01Spirituality and dogmatic religion have nothing to do with nothing.
00:39:05And you've proven that, just as sure as you are horny.
00:39:07You're being way too clinical here.
00:39:10Who was your first lay?
00:39:12What?
00:39:13Who was your first lay?
00:39:16Okay, well, if we're gonna volunteer our sexual histories here, you're next.
00:39:19Fair game.
00:39:20Okay, I've only ever slept with Stephanie.
00:39:24Oh.
00:39:25Could you get it up the first time?
00:39:27Okay, you stooped to a new low.
00:39:30Okay, how many people have you had sex with?
00:39:32Zero.
00:39:34What?
00:39:36I've never had sex with anyone, male or female.
00:39:39Really?
00:39:40But Alex, you're older than I am.
00:39:42What can I say?
00:39:42I've been confused.
00:39:44Yeah, you're a basket case.
00:39:45You haven't said a single thing that's made sense all night.
00:39:48I guess I'm having a lesbian cow moment.
00:39:50I still don't get what that means.
00:39:52Would you stop making fun of my joke?
00:39:54I forgot you were even here, Jeff.
00:39:56Oh, no.
00:39:57You stay right there.
00:39:58You are one vicious bitch.
00:39:59I'm playing nice.
00:40:01I haven't yelled at you at all in two hours.
00:40:03I mean it.
00:40:04You stay right there.
00:40:05Did it ever occur to you that your joke is offensive to both lesbians and cattle?
00:40:11Well, if you were openly gay, I would understand maybe why you take such issue with, like,
00:40:15this mindless joke, but you don't even know who you are.
00:40:17What's that supposed to mean?
00:40:19It means you're in the closet and you're too confused to know even how far back.
00:40:23He's right, Alex.
00:40:24You are deep in the closet.
00:40:26You are so far back, you're where the snow and the lamppost are.
00:40:30That's a wardrobe-o-literary scholar.
00:40:32The point being, are you a lessie or not?
00:40:37I don't know.
00:40:38I haven't really thought about it.
00:40:39Oh, please.
00:40:40I don't buy that for a second.
00:40:42What, are you going to assault me now like you assaulted your sister?
00:40:45Is that going to happen every time we talk about this?
00:40:47I've just never put much thought into it.
00:40:49Well, you sure have put a lot of thought into everything else, like how to break all
00:40:52three of us.
00:40:53Maybe you're the one who can't get it up.
00:40:55Really, genius?
00:40:56I can't get it up?
00:40:57Do I need to teach you about the female anatomy?
00:40:59Or were you too busy not getting that while you were doing my sister?
00:41:03No, he's right.
00:41:05You've never done it, and your one crush is unattainable.
00:41:08You're the impotent one.
00:41:11Well.
00:41:15Checkmate?
00:41:16Man, I should feel vindictive now, but I just feel awkward.
00:41:21How about we make friends?
00:41:23No, I don't trust any of you, particularly you.
00:41:26Why, because I told a stupid joke?
00:41:28Yes.
00:41:30Whoa.
00:41:32Okay, there is definitely some kind of ghost in here.
00:41:37What's your Juliet, Jeff?
00:41:40What?
00:41:42You're not making any sense.
00:41:43Sorry.
00:41:45Lesbian cow moment.
00:41:47But no, I'm asking a serious question.
00:41:50What's your Julia?
00:41:51We all know what my Julia is.
00:41:53It's been exposed for the whole world to see.
00:41:55But what's your Julia?
00:41:59I know what it is.
00:42:01It's not just one girl.
00:42:02It's the whole lot of them.
00:42:04It's because you can't get any.
00:42:06What?
00:42:07What are you talking about?
00:42:08You're not making any sense.
00:42:10You look like the guy on YouTube is the best you could get.
00:42:13And I've heard these aren't even the most successful of your exploits.
00:42:16So in truth, you're no different than me.
00:42:20Dumber?
00:42:21Yes.
00:42:22Lacking in personal sanitation?
00:42:24Yes, but sexually quite impotent.
00:42:26So I think you should join me on the floor of shame over here.
00:42:29Jeff is nowhere near as bad as you.
00:42:32Well, I like to think of biting wit as a virtue.
00:42:36Unless you mean that somehow I should be ashamed of having a gay crush.
00:42:39Oh, well, at least you're actually saying the word now.
00:42:42What do you know?
00:42:43You men walk around with your shirts and pants off
00:42:45and think that you're entitled to everything on earth.
00:42:49Wow, I guess it's true what they say about lesbians hating men.
00:42:53Oh, believe me, sweetie, that part of my personality has been in play long ago.
00:43:02So should we go back to looking for the money?
00:43:05You and your stupid money.
00:43:06I never want to hear the word money again after tonight.
00:43:10Look, we're all cranky from lack of sleep.
00:43:14Therefore, I suggest we all take a nap.
00:43:17It'll be daylight in a few hours anyway.
00:43:19I have a flight to catch tomorrow, unless it's canceled.
00:43:23Maybe they'll let me keep the rental card for another day.
00:43:25Maybe they'll tell you where to put it.
00:43:28What was that?
00:43:29I said maybe they'll tell you where to get putting.
00:43:31I'm sorry, I was just having a lesbian cow moment.
00:43:37Well, I'm going to take a nap.
00:43:39I don't even care about the bed.
00:43:42Hear, hear.
00:43:44Come on.
00:43:59I'm really not that tired.
00:44:01I mean, I knew we'd be up tonight.
00:44:04Well, we had enough of an adventure tonight.
00:44:09Look, I guess I should apologize for my sister.
00:44:15What the holy hell is wrong with her?
00:44:18I don't know.
00:44:18I mean, I knew she was aggressive,
00:44:21but I've never seen her lash out at a complete stranger like that.
00:44:25I guess he really hit a nerve tonight.
00:44:26Well, you started it.
00:44:27You were the one who spotted the crush.
00:44:37I can't sleep.
00:44:38This bed is uncomfortable.
00:44:39Fine, don't sleep.
00:44:40Just let me rest.
00:44:44I know one thing we like to do when we can't sleep.
00:44:48Tonight's probably not the best night for that.
00:44:51I'll change that in a few seconds.
00:44:58Okay.
00:45:09Okay.
00:45:16Close your eyes.
00:45:32Is that what I think it is?
00:45:33Yep.
00:45:34What are you doing?
00:45:35Did you find the money?
00:45:37You're kidding me.
00:45:38Did you find the money and not tell me?
00:45:39With all due respect, you have a good motive for not doing so.
00:45:42No, that's not possible.
00:45:43Where would I hide it?
00:45:44In my ass?
00:45:45I just want to be sure.
00:45:50Get out of here.
00:45:54Gotcha.
00:45:56Okay.
00:45:58You made me wet myself.
00:45:59That's great.
00:46:00Thanks.
00:46:01You know, I know you're not going to murder me, though.
00:46:03Oh, yeah?
00:46:04You're too religious.
00:46:04Uh-huh.
00:46:05Yeah, well, what can I say?
00:46:07Being in the dark changes your morals.
00:46:13So?
00:46:15You gotta tell me what's going on?
00:46:27You know Homer left me.
00:46:29Yeah, like seven months ago.
00:46:31Am I like excess baggage?
00:46:32No, you're great.
00:46:35It's just, he took everything.
00:46:40It's like, I got home one day and him and half my stuff were gone,
00:46:46and he never answered his phone again.
00:46:49He even took my cello, which he doesn't play, just to hurt me, I guess.
00:46:57I could really use the money right now.
00:47:00And it doesn't help that I hate my job and my boss.
00:47:05That bitch makes me get on the floor to fix firewire cables.
00:47:09I mean, I wish my boss was a Julia, you know?
00:47:15Like, she paid me, gave me the respect I deserve.
00:47:20Sure, I'd fall in love with the debts.
00:47:22So that's what you want the money?
00:47:24Yes.
00:47:25Damn it, I have a bachelor's.
00:47:27I mean, I shouldn't be running office errands and fixing cables.
00:47:32I want to quit and start writing again.
00:47:36I feel trapped, you know?
00:47:38Like, like I'm the one that can't get it up.
00:47:41Well, that's how you feel that way.
00:47:44You know, everybody's first job sucks.
00:47:46I know, but what's the point?
00:47:49They don't give you a position to move up to.
00:47:52Well, you certainly are your sister's sister.
00:47:55I don't know what that means, but I have a feeling you're right.
00:47:59I mean, you can both get angry, both dramatic.
00:48:03You'd both kill me to prove a point.
00:48:07That's just our sense of humor.
00:48:09We definitely inherited that from mom.
00:48:11Yeah, I think you inherited more than you'd like to share.
00:48:15But anyway, it doesn't matter.
00:48:19Sorry about your job.
00:48:21You didn't deserve that.
00:48:23I know, that's exactly what my boss said, which just made it sting even worse.
00:48:28But anyway, I guess you can take some pleasure lying here,
00:48:33reminiscing about how much life sucks.
00:48:37The problem is, what do you do when you have to get up?
00:48:41I don't know.
00:48:45You know, I feel like I've known you a lot longer than however many months you said it was.
00:48:50Five.
00:48:52Yeah, you're a lot wiser than your years.
00:48:55It's complimented by your sister.
00:48:58What's that mean?
00:48:59Well, that I wondered about you.
00:49:04Well, if it makes you feel any better, you're all I have.
00:49:09I mean, I'm sure we won't see much of Alex after tonight,
00:49:13so you're the only person I'm close to.
00:49:19But you've been good to me.
00:49:22More like a husband than a boyfriend, you know?
00:49:27Boyfriends come and go,
00:49:30and then one day when you're at a friend's house,
00:49:32they come over and steal your friggin' cello.
00:49:39I'm sure if I had a cello, you wouldn't steal it.
00:49:44I don't know.
00:49:46What I do know is that life is not a fairy tale.
00:49:51It's been a hard pill to swallow coming from someone who grew up bringing Jane to Austin.
00:49:56Oh, I'd like to think I'm not as bad as all that.
00:49:59You're not.
00:50:04Hey.
00:50:08Why'd you tell your sister about us?
00:50:10What?
00:50:11You know, that we did it.
00:50:14Like you don't tell your guy friends.
00:50:16Yeah, but they're not gonna grill you in your face because you couldn't get it up.
00:50:20You did have trouble getting it up at first.
00:50:22Yeah, I know.
00:50:23I mean, it's okay.
00:50:25You just gotta learn the ropes.
00:50:27Gotta learn how to properly stimulate the little guy.
00:50:31Well, it wouldn't-
00:50:32He's kind of cute in retrospect.
00:50:33Yeah, well-
00:50:36Hey, you know, it wouldn't have been the easiest honeymoon if we'd have waited.
00:50:42Sex has been good for me.
00:50:44I hope it's been good for you, too.
00:50:51Do you think we'll ever get married?
00:50:53You can't ask a question like that after five months.
00:50:56Ugh, I'm not proposing.
00:50:58I just want to see if you could see it working.
00:51:04Honestly?
00:51:06No, not right now.
00:51:08It's not because I don't care about you, because I do, but it's just like
00:51:11I don't think we're mature.
00:51:14Well, that's kind of my point.
00:51:17That we, all four of us, are not yet mature.
00:51:22What do you mean, immature?
00:51:23No, there's a difference.
00:51:25I mean, I agree with you.
00:51:27I don't want to be a wife, and I love you, and I'm glad we're here sharing a moment.
00:51:38A moment where I say I don't think I'm gonna marry you?
00:51:43No, a moment of honesty.
00:51:48Fine, fair enough.
00:51:51Let's just share our moment of bliss, then.
00:52:09What is it?
00:52:11Someone hit me.
00:52:12Hello, I've been right here the whole time.
00:52:16What do you mean, hit?
00:52:17Okay, maybe not like hit, but grazed me?
00:52:21Jeff, do you honestly think it was me?
00:52:26No, no, I guess it couldn't have been you.
00:52:28I opened my eyes right after it happened.
00:52:30You were sitting right there, so that wouldn't make sense.
00:52:33I don't know.
00:52:33I wouldn't put it past Alex to feel up a random person, then jump back.
00:52:36Enough.
00:52:37Look, there's like a ghost in here.
00:52:38Stop saying that.
00:52:39You've been saying that all night.
00:52:40Does it not strike you guys there's something a little off in this house?
00:52:43It has been ever since we got here.
00:52:45Maybe you've been in the dark too much.
00:52:47No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:52:49There is a ghost here.
00:52:50Look at this, I'm bleeding.
00:52:51You did that just now, you nimrod.
00:52:53Look, you're squeezing it.
00:52:55Does it really hurt that bad?
00:52:56I mean, I already got assaulted tonight.
00:52:58Wasn't by a ghost, though.
00:53:00Yes, it hurts.
00:53:01I have a wound.
00:53:03Maybe this ghost is the patron saint of lesbian cows.
00:53:11Come on, I'll tend to it.
00:53:15I've always hated this bathroom.
00:53:24Me too.
00:53:25I think some of my first drinks were in here.
00:53:28A little vodka in high school.
00:53:30Every time you visited mom, you always asked to go to the bathroom.
00:53:33Yeah, most of my memories of that toilet are of throwing up in it.
00:53:37Hi, my name is Jeff and I'm bleeding.
00:53:41Wait a second.
00:53:42Here's the alcohol.
00:53:45And the cough syrup.
00:53:47Where's the liquid ammonia?
00:53:52I'm dead serious.
00:53:53It's liquid ammonia.
00:53:54It's a chemical.
00:53:54It's dangerous.
00:53:56Well, I didn't take it.
00:53:58Neither did I.
00:53:59You all showered in here.
00:54:00You were all alone in the bathroom.
00:54:02I mean, unless we showered in the ammonia, I don't know where it would have gone.
00:54:06You can check our pockets if you want.
00:54:08Steph, why would anyone steal ammonia?
00:54:10Was the money in there or something?
00:54:12No, it obviously wouldn't have fit.
00:54:15So what's the big deal?
00:54:16The big deal is that it was here a few minutes ago.
00:54:20And the fact that it's missing is a little creepy.
00:54:24Thank you.
00:54:25And once again, I'm out of here.
00:54:29You're off again?
00:54:33Wait, so you're going now?
00:54:36I am freaked out enough as it is.
00:54:37I'm sure that a shrink would find all three of you very special.
00:54:41You don't really think there's a ghost in here, do you?
00:54:44I'm sorry.
00:54:46I'm not shaggy and I can't be bribed with Scooby snacks to stay and face a ghost.
00:54:50Zoinks!
00:54:51Wait, Jeff.
00:54:52It's almost five.
00:54:53Washington Avenue will be open at 6 a.m.
00:54:57There are plenty of other ways to pass an hour.
00:55:01Till six.
00:55:02That's what you agreed to.
00:55:04This has been the longest night in the history of my life.
00:55:08In one night, I've seen the worst out of all three of you.
00:55:11And I just met you two girls.
00:55:12Hey, man.
00:55:13I haven't been that bad.
00:55:16No, that's right.
00:55:16You're exonerated.
00:55:17Cool.
00:55:17Look, I'm bleeding.
00:55:20I'm tired and I stink.
00:55:22I'm still here.
00:55:27So what are you going to do?
00:55:28I don't know.
00:55:29I'm not going to do anything.
00:55:30I'm not going to do anything.
00:55:31I'm not going to do anything.
00:55:33So what do you suggest we do for the remaining hour?
00:55:36Well, we never finished the books.
00:55:39We could give another run at it.
00:55:45Okay.
00:55:47One more hour.
00:55:49All right?
00:55:50Then I'm out of here.
00:55:52See ya.
00:56:02So
00:56:32come on.
00:56:59It looks really nice out, guys.
00:57:00You want to go for a walk?
00:57:30It's like someone wants to shine in on you.
00:57:42It made me wonder why we had day and night and green and brown and leaves on the trees.
00:57:52Alex.
00:57:54Alex!
00:58:00Thank you.
00:58:09Yeah, of course.
00:58:13I guess a little spirituality can kill you.
00:58:17No, idiots driving around at 6 a.m. can kill you.
00:58:25There we go.
00:58:28Hello?
00:58:28Service.
00:58:31Uh, hi, Susan.
00:58:33Listen, I'm sorry if I woke you, but I have big news.
00:58:35We've been bought by Hilton.
00:58:37Hilton?
00:58:39Yep, just this morning.
00:58:41So we're going to have a lot of new openings, and we'll need you to stay on board.
00:58:43You...
00:58:45Oh.
00:58:47Wow.
00:58:49Thanks.
00:58:51No cancellations.
00:58:53Guess I'm taking the flight back to Cali.
00:58:55So the weather's good.
00:58:58Everything should be fine.
00:59:00Yes, yes.
00:59:02It won't be exactly the same job, but there's a chance.
00:59:04Uh, what about Jeff?
00:59:06So, uh, I think I'm going to tell Julia I'm in love with her.
00:59:08Well, we need as many people as we can.
00:59:10The whole office structure is going to change.
00:59:12That is absolutely amazing.
00:59:14I mean, I know her feelings aren't mutual,
00:59:16but what's the worst that could happen?
00:59:18Well, you never know.
00:59:20It might be a little weird,
00:59:22but maybe it'll work out.
00:59:25Might be a little weird,
00:59:27but maybe it'll help the friendship.
00:59:29What about that girl?
00:59:31What girl?
00:59:33Your friend, Laura?
00:59:37I haven't talked to her in a very long time.
00:59:41I'll do my part if you do yours.
00:59:43Eh...
00:59:49It's not like you're not brave.
00:59:51Okay.
00:59:54Alright.
00:59:56Deal.
01:00:00That's amazing.
01:00:02The Hilton just up and bought the Mara Inn this morning?
01:00:04Just so suddenly?
01:00:06Well, Bruce, I probably shouldn't be telling you this,
01:00:08but there was a fire here last night.
01:00:10A fire?
01:00:12Relax, no one was hurt.
01:00:14It was in the ballroom in the middle of the night,
01:00:16but it was a blow we didn't need right now.
01:00:18That's incredible.
01:00:20Well, the weird part, and this is really the last thing I can tell you, Bruce,
01:00:23is that it was something I didn't understand
01:00:25about an explosion with metal ions,
01:00:27but the bottom line is
01:00:29it all started because of a leak of liquid ammonia
01:00:31and no one has any clue where it came from.
01:00:37The ammonia's still missing.
01:00:39Where could it be?
01:00:41It's the ghost, man.
01:00:43I'm telling you, the ghost went and saved our jobs.
01:00:45For all I know,
01:00:47one of you could have taken the ammonia
01:00:49and started the fire yourself.
01:00:52It took quite some time.
01:00:54Oh, actually, you're right, Alex.
01:00:56I stole the ammonia,
01:00:58drove two hours all the way to the hotel,
01:01:00started the fire,
01:01:02drove two hours all the way back,
01:01:04and then those four hours I was gone,
01:01:06nobody noticed?
01:01:08Well, whatever.
01:01:18Thank you, Ghost Mom.
01:01:20You're here.
01:01:26Well, this has been a great night of accomplishing nothing.
01:01:30I guess the last half hour worked out, though.
01:01:34You guys got your jobs back,
01:01:36and I almost died.
01:01:40Now I got a plane to catch.
01:01:42Bye, sis.
01:01:44She's such a good girl, guys,
01:01:46isn't she?
01:01:48Goodbye, Stephanie.
01:01:50It was nice meeting you.
01:01:52Bye.
01:01:54I'll take a long nap when I get home,
01:01:56but I'll call you as soon as I regain consciousness, okay?
01:01:58Thank you, sweetie.
01:02:02Well, I guess you guys have to drive off
01:02:04towards the highway, don't you?
01:02:06Yep.
01:02:08Sorry I gave you guys so much grief tonight,
01:02:10especially you, Jeff.
01:02:12You're a good person.
01:02:14And valiant.
01:02:16Blah, blah, blah.
01:02:18Basically, I saved your ass.
01:02:20Yeah, thank you.
01:02:22Ain't no thang but a chicken wang.
01:02:26Take good care of her.
01:02:34Steph, I almost forgot.
01:02:36You have to give a speech, sweetie.
01:02:38Just like Mom did.
01:02:40She wouldn't let any visitors leave
01:02:42before she gave a speech.
01:02:48Alright then,
01:02:50I guess I'll make one.
01:02:56My dear friends,
01:02:58over the last three years,
01:03:00I've lost everything.
01:03:04My friends are all gone.
01:03:06And...
01:03:08now my mom's gone.
01:03:12But it's like I said before.
01:03:16Life happens.
01:03:20There's no way that it's supposed to be.
01:03:26I'm getting older now,
01:03:28and the best thing I could do
01:03:30is let other people live their lives.
01:03:32Find my own peace.
01:03:36Now this place,
01:03:38this place is the only link
01:03:40I have to my past.
01:03:42But it's also a memento
01:03:44in a different way.
01:03:46A museum of childhood.
01:03:50And childhood,
01:03:52well,
01:03:54at least my childhood,
01:03:56was built on a false idea
01:03:58of the way life was supposed to be.
01:04:00An idea of the way life
01:04:02was supposed to be like.
01:04:06So I'm happy to let it go.
01:04:10I don't know what it meant to you guys.
01:04:12Maybe it was some kind of
01:04:14temple of torture or something.
01:04:20But for one night,
01:04:22just one night,
01:04:26it was a home again.
01:04:28And I was happy to say goodbye to it.
01:04:32I guess there's no conclusion I could reach here.
01:04:36There are no real conclusions.
01:04:40No solid ones.
01:04:42Maybe tomorrow Julia will kiss me.
01:04:46Or she'll fire me.
01:04:50Or she'll never speak to me again.
01:04:54It's unavoidable.
01:04:58I don't know.
01:05:04I feel a trance right now.
01:05:08Like the one I was describing earlier.
01:05:12The kind that Buddhists call Nirvana.
01:05:16I desire nothing.
01:05:22And I feel a tiny tinge of gratitude
01:05:24for every moment that I live.
01:05:28Amen?
01:05:30Amen.
01:05:58Amen.
01:06:28Your mom really lived like this?
01:06:32Mom would always say her money was in the toilet.
01:06:58Stephanie, hand me that book.
01:07:00Yes, mom.
01:07:02Alexandra, are you listening?
01:07:04Yeah, trust me, mom.
01:07:06I know you're listening.
01:07:08Okay, I'm listening.
01:07:10I'm listening.
01:07:12I'm listening.
01:07:14I'm listening.
01:07:16I'm listening.
01:07:18I'm listening.
01:07:20I'm listening.
01:07:22I'm listening.
01:07:24I'm listening.
01:07:26Are you listening?
01:07:28Yeah, trust me, mom. I can always hear you.
01:07:30Oh, you're an incorrigible young lady.
01:07:32Now, where is that poem?
01:07:36What is mine all belongs to my children.
01:07:40What I take belongs to the forthcoming generation.
01:07:44A strange little band
01:07:46inflicting pain with joy.
01:07:48How affirming it must feel
01:07:50to be death.
01:07:52To take the pieces of life
01:07:54and place them together
01:07:56however you fancy them to be construed.
01:07:58A space too vast
01:08:00to be even a puzzle
01:08:02pouring endlessly
01:08:04over the edge.
01:08:24I'm listening.
01:08:26I'm listening.
01:08:28I'm listening.
01:08:30I'm listening.
01:08:32I'm listening.
01:08:34I'm listening.
01:08:36I'm listening.
01:08:38I'm listening.
01:08:40I'm listening.
01:08:42I'm listening.
01:08:44I'm listening.
01:08:46I'm listening.
01:08:48I'm listening.
01:08:50I'm listening.
01:08:52I'm listening.
01:08:54I'm listening.
01:08:56I'm listening.
01:08:58I'm listening.
01:09:00I'm listening.
01:09:02I'm listening.
01:09:04I'm listening.
01:09:06I'm listening.
01:09:08I'm listening.
01:09:10I'm listening.
01:09:12I'm listening.
01:09:14I'm listening.
01:09:16I'm listening.
01:09:18I'm listening.
01:09:20I'm listening.
01:09:22I'm listening.
01:09:24I'm listening.
01:09:26I'm listening.
01:09:28I'm listening.
01:09:30I'm listening.
01:09:32I'm listening.
01:09:34I'm listening.
01:09:36I'm listening.
01:09:38I'm listening.
01:09:40I'm listening.
01:09:42I'm listening.
01:09:44I'm listening.
01:09:46I'm listening.
01:09:48I'm listening.
01:09:50I'm listening.
01:09:52I'm listening.
01:09:54I'm listening.
01:09:56I'm listening.
01:09:58I'm listening.
01:10:00I'm listening.
01:10:02I'm listening.
01:10:04I'm listening.
01:10:06I'm listening.
01:10:08I'm listening.
01:10:10I'm listening.
01:10:12I'm listening.
01:10:14I'm listening.