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00:00:00 # Just hear those sleigh bells... #
00:00:02 So, Alistair went away to Berlin for a week
00:00:06 and came back talking about all this great art he'd made there.
00:00:10 I'm playing supportive part and I ask him where it is.
00:00:13 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:14 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:15 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:16 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:17 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:18 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:19 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:20 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:21 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:22 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:23 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:24 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:25 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:26 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:27 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:28 I say, "Where what is?"
00:00:29 He says, "Where what is?"
00:00:30 I'm like, "Well, you do mixed media, I run a gallery,
00:00:33 "I'd love to see this great art you've made."
00:00:35 OK.
00:00:36 It's a short film of him and this hairy, older Cuban man
00:00:41 having very slippery sex on a greased-up tarp
00:00:45 in what looks like an empty shoe store.
00:00:47 Put in the eggnog down.
00:00:48 Mark, they made seven short films.
00:00:52 Did they have sex in all of them?
00:00:54 It's to do with the eroticism of greed,
00:00:58 or capitalism, or something plainly well-intentioned.
00:01:01 Joke's on me if I stay.
00:01:03 So you're going to break up with him?
00:01:05 No.
00:01:06 No, it's too much hassle.
00:01:08 I'll just let him do it eventually.
00:01:11 Are there any decent men in this city?
00:01:13 Thomas, how many times do I have to tell you?
00:01:16 You don't get to chime in on this
00:01:18 because you've made your own eggnog.
00:01:20 And your hot, wealthy husband is about to lead a singalong
00:01:24 by a roaring fire, so...
00:01:26 That question was intended to just float there for a second.
00:01:30 It's the only box with your name on it.
00:01:32 Oh!
00:01:33 I didn't know this was a gifts thing.
00:01:37 I forgot to bring wine.
00:01:39 Don't tell Terrence I told you that
00:01:40 because we got in a fight about it on the way here.
00:01:42 Oh, yeah?
00:01:43 Considering we practically share my husband,
00:01:45 I thought it only right.
00:01:47 Mark doesn't deserve you.
00:01:49 You know that, right?
00:01:50 And listen, if things go south between you two,
00:01:52 I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here.
00:01:54 OK, well, I'm sure Terrence will be happy about that.
00:01:56 Oh, he'd understand.
00:01:58 If this is a check for my rent, I swear to God...
00:02:02 Hmm.
00:02:05 Incoming.
00:02:06 What the fuck are these?
00:02:07 Oh, well, those are hand-crafted maracas.
00:02:12 After last year, I thought it would be nice
00:02:14 if you could still participate in the carols.
00:02:17 Do you know what? This is actually abuse.
00:02:20 That song that you picked last year wasn't in my key, not on me.
00:02:23 My love, your voice is like a church organ
00:02:25 someone threw out of a window.
00:02:27 Suing this household for emotional damages, actually.
00:02:31 Empty threats. Empty threats.
00:02:33 What are we suing for this time?
00:02:35 I think it's high time I put me first.
00:02:37 Oh, as opposed to all the other times you don't put yourself first.
00:02:40 Thank you.
00:02:41 From your husband.
00:02:42 I'm being silenced.
00:02:44 Why would you do that to her?
00:02:45 These are actually really beautiful.
00:02:47 Thank you.
00:02:48 Honestly, the gaslighting around my thing is unbelievable.
00:02:51 No, no, no, you are absolutely timed, Ellie.
00:02:54 And loud.
00:02:55 Really fucking loud, and I love you for it.
00:02:59 How many drinks have you had?
00:03:01 None of your goddamn business. Give me that, please.
00:03:03 Okay.
00:03:04 May I request the honour of everyone's attention, please?
00:03:08 Sorry, I'm late.
00:03:09 Daddy.
00:03:10 We all know what time it is.
00:03:15 Oh!
00:03:16 Yeah.
00:03:18 Yeah.
00:03:19 So, come, come, come, Jackie darling.
00:03:21 Would you get the sheet music off the piano and just pass it around to everybody?
00:03:24 You should also have received, I know you have, is my email
00:03:28 with the audio files of all of your parts.
00:03:30 Did I hear about the audio files?
00:03:32 Generously arranged by the magnificent Peter Finlay,
00:03:36 former lover turned friend turned Academy Award nominated composer.
00:03:40 Who has taken time away from his very busy schedule
00:03:45 scoring the new Victoria Valentine version.
00:03:48 Victoria Valentine film.
00:03:50 To accompany us this evening.
00:03:52 We love you, Petey.
00:03:54 Bye.
00:03:55 No, but truly, thank you all for making this one of the great nights of the year.
00:04:01 And to my darling Marcus, my love, may I one day be worthy.
00:04:06 Okay.
00:04:09 Petey.
00:04:10 Loud and proud.
00:04:13 Every day.
00:04:18 Yes.
00:04:19 Beautiful.
00:04:46 More, Timon.
00:04:47 Angelic.
00:04:58 Sound glorious.
00:05:11 When my baby.
00:05:13 When my baby comes home.
00:05:18 Be like a holiday.
00:05:30 When my baby.
00:05:39 When my baby comes home.
00:05:41 Baby comes home.
00:05:44 Baby comes home.
00:05:47 Baby comes home.
00:05:50 Baby comes home.
00:05:53 Another shimmering success.
00:06:06 Yes.
00:06:07 Sophie, you're starting to hiccup.
00:06:13 What's your point?
00:06:14 Catch up.
00:06:15 You deserve it.
00:06:16 As you do most things in this life.
00:06:18 You should shake the barman.
00:06:19 I saw him hang you up.
00:06:21 Probably because he's never seen a single human eat so many sausage rolls.
00:06:25 I'd rather shake you.
00:06:27 That's okay.
00:06:28 Not right now.
00:06:29 Give Mrs. Bandini one more reason to call the police on the puffs across the road.
00:06:34 I'll be back at the start of the week.
00:06:36 We have lots to discuss.
00:06:39 I'm off, you animals.
00:06:41 Make big mistakes.
00:06:42 Please.
00:06:45 I love you madly.
00:06:46 I love you.
00:06:47 When do I get that?
00:07:08 My boyfriend.
00:07:10 You know, I think he experimented in drag school.
00:07:13 Didn't like it.
00:07:14 Really?
00:07:15 I just mean like a decent human being, you know, because like you've got that.
00:07:18 Me and you break up and now you're 15 years into all this.
00:07:21 What have I got?
00:07:22 Honey.
00:07:23 So Terrence asked me to move in with him.
00:07:25 That took long enough.
00:07:27 Yeah, well, I haven't gotten back to him yet.
00:07:29 Why?
00:07:30 Too clean.
00:07:31 I feel like I can't be myself there, do you know what I mean?
00:07:34 No.
00:07:35 Be yourself like what?
00:07:36 Live in squalor?
00:07:38 Throw garbage on the floor?
00:07:39 Maybe.
00:07:40 That's what I wanted to do, you know.
00:07:42 Hey, babe.
00:07:45 Love the way I treat you.
00:07:47 Cool.
00:07:48 We're talking about you two.
00:07:51 If only you could see how you look from across a room.
00:07:55 Take your fucking breath away.
00:07:58 Up close, big old mess.
00:08:01 By the way, Mark, this eggnog is delightful.
00:08:06 Thank you very much. You're the only one that tried it.
00:08:08 Merry Christmas.
00:08:10 Fuck.
00:08:13 Looks like someone had one too many before he drove it home tonight.
00:08:16 Jesus.
00:08:17 Son of a bitch.
00:08:23 Cow.
00:08:24 Yeah.
00:08:25 What?
00:08:27 Fuck.
00:08:29 [music]
00:08:31 [music]
00:08:34 [music]
00:08:37 [music]
00:08:40 [music]
00:08:42 [music]
00:08:45 [music]
00:08:48 [music]
00:08:51 [music]
00:08:54 [music]
00:08:57 [music]
00:09:00 [music]
00:09:03 [music]
00:09:07 (gentle music)
00:09:09 (gentle music)
00:09:12 (gentle music)
00:09:14 (gentle music)
00:09:17 (gentle music)
00:09:27 (gentle music)
00:09:32 (gentle music)
00:09:43 (gentle music)
00:09:45 - Lily Kane has gone and had her tits done.
00:09:54 (laughing)
00:09:55 And the studio is having a meltdown
00:09:58 because Victoria Valentine now has implants.
00:10:01 I mean, what do they expect me to do?
00:10:05 I write the books, they make the movies,
00:10:07 and you, my love, redo our gorgeous kitchen.
00:10:09 - I redo the kitchen?
00:10:11 - I redo the kitchen on top of illustrating
00:10:13 all of your books and doing the covers
00:10:16 and fending off throngs of sobbing teenage girls
00:10:21 knocking on our door, wondering when you're going
00:10:23 to finish the next two books you promised them.
00:10:26 (laughing)
00:10:28 - I owe you my life, Marcus Darnley.
00:10:31 - I know you do.
00:10:32 - And thank God for those teenage girls.
00:10:34 - No, not tonight.
00:10:35 Not when they're taking you away from your own party early.
00:10:38 - Well, it's our party.
00:10:40 - As you planned it, knowing full well
00:10:43 that I had a book signing in Paris in the morning.
00:10:46 - It's a signing.
00:10:47 You could have pushed a signing.
00:10:49 - You don't push a Christmas signing
00:10:51 at the Louvre, my love.
00:10:52 - I told you how handsome you look tonight.
00:10:57 - Not enough, honestly.
00:10:58 - Tell me the piano got tuned.
00:11:02 - The piano got tuned.
00:11:05 - Mm.
00:11:06 Even the funny key?
00:11:09 (laughing)
00:11:11 - Ripley.
00:11:13 (laughing)
00:11:15 - Oh, I have longed for people before.
00:11:18 I have loved people before.
00:11:20 But not like this.
00:11:24 It was not this.
00:11:25 Give me a world.
00:11:27 You've taken the world I was.
00:11:29 - Did you just come up with that?
00:11:35 - Well, Anne Carson.
00:11:37 - I'd give up this house to have written that.
00:11:39 - Well, we don't want that, we just redid our kitchen.
00:11:42 - You're right.
00:11:43 - Thank you for the party.
00:11:48 (gentle music)
00:11:51 - Oliver changed so many people's lives.
00:12:19 (gentle music)
00:12:21 Especially mine.
00:12:22 I remember reading part of the first Victoria Valentine book
00:12:27 for my audition for the film and thinking,
00:12:30 this character is why I wanted to be an actress.
00:12:36 She's strong, smart.
00:12:42 She's a truth seeker.
00:12:46 Literally, she's telepathic,
00:12:49 but I'm sure you all know that.
00:12:51 And now he's gone and my heart breaks
00:12:57 for his family and for our movie.
00:13:04 All of us wondering why, why did this have to happen?
00:13:09 He had so many more stories to tell.
00:13:15 But life fucking sucks.
00:13:17 And now we don't know if we'll end up shooting
00:13:19 the fifth and sixth movies
00:13:20 because he was still writing them.
00:13:23 So, Oliver, you little slut.
00:13:30 I hope the studio greenlights them in your honor
00:13:36 and that we get to continue to tell your stories
00:13:39 for many years to come,
00:13:40 because we need them.
00:13:45 - Oliver's first word was move,
00:13:54 as in out of my way.
00:13:59 He can't have been more than one.
00:14:06 I was blocking his path to our little back garden
00:14:10 and he was determined to get to the snap dragons.
00:14:15 He loved squeezing their heads, making them talk.
00:14:22 He didn't know it at the time,
00:14:26 but he was telling stories even before he could speak.
00:14:32 Growing up, he'd share his writing with his mom and me,
00:14:37 always about princesses in search of things.
00:14:43 I've been thinking a lot these days about all the times
00:14:52 I encouraged him to write about something else,
00:14:56 something boys would write about.
00:15:01 He was quite defiant.
00:15:04 I'm a boy.
00:15:06 This is what I want to write about.
00:15:09 I can hear him now scolding me
00:15:15 for underselling his stories.
00:15:17 I had a tendency to do that
00:15:23 and he'd be right.
00:15:28 But it's not a light thing
00:15:33 to know that your child succeeded in spite of you.
00:15:40 I only wish I could have told him how much I regret
00:15:48 blocking his path to the snap dragons.
00:15:55 I hope you're having a laugh with your mom up there.
00:15:58 What I wouldn't do to take your place, son.
00:16:05 I love you and I'm proud of you.
00:16:12 I'm so proud of you.
00:16:18 (gentle music)
00:16:21 Always loved your sketches.
00:16:47 How many times have you promised me new work?
00:16:49 There'll always be space for you when you're ready.
00:16:55 - Thank you for coming to stay.
00:17:03 - Well, it is a huge burden to get to use your kitchen
00:17:11 and sleep on an expensive memory foam mattress,
00:17:13 but you said you wanted company.
00:17:15 - I'm not a big fan of that.
00:17:17 - Well, I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:19 - Well, I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:20 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:21 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:22 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:23 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:24 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:25 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:26 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:27 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:28 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:29 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:30 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:31 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:32 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:33 - I'm not a big fan of that either.
00:17:57 - Lawyers are on it.
00:18:01 We'll have more for you soon.
00:18:02 - Okay.
00:18:03 - Lawyers are on it.
00:18:04 We'll have more for you soon.
00:18:05 - Okay.
00:18:06 - And you, haven't been sleeping.
00:18:07 - And you, haven't been sleeping.
00:18:08 - I've been reading that the brain is like a muscle.
00:18:09 I've been reading that the brain is like a muscle.
00:18:10 It's why getting over a death is so hard,
00:18:11 It's why getting over a death is so hard,
00:18:12 because your brain has been trained
00:18:13 because your brain has been trained
00:18:14 to feel things for a person.
00:18:15 to feel things for a person.
00:18:16 And I've been reading that the brain is like a muscle.
00:18:17 to feel things for a person.
00:18:18 And I've been reading that the brain is like a muscle.
00:18:19 And I've been reading that the brain is like a muscle.
00:18:20 It's why getting over a death is so hard,
00:18:26 And when they go away,
00:18:27 And when they go away,
00:18:28 your head is still operating
00:18:29 your head is still operating
00:18:30 under the impression that it should feel those things
00:18:32 under the impression that it should feel those things
00:18:34 for that person.
00:18:36 Like muscle memory.
00:18:41 So I'm just trying to train my brain
00:18:43 to not feel as much for right now.
00:18:47 Just to get me through the next year
00:18:48 Just to get me through the next year
00:18:50 so that I'm not constantly reminded of the fact
00:18:53 that I am now both an orphan and a widow.
00:19:01 Why does it look like I haven't been sleeping?
00:19:04 I think we'll hold off on the will for today.
00:19:09 I'm going to murder you for this.
00:19:23 You've got this babe, I believe in you.
00:19:26 Alright guys, all done.
00:19:27 Setting up the bars, bring yourself over to the board.
00:19:29 We'll go through what we're going to do today.
00:19:31 Sit on the ankles.
00:19:34 Good, on the third rep, paws at the bottom.
00:19:37 Hands on the inside of the knees.
00:19:40 Good, lovely.
00:19:41 In this position, I want you to cough for me.
00:19:44 Feel your abdominals.
00:19:47 Nice, you okay?
00:19:48 I don't know, she's not doing it properly.
00:19:50 I think you might need to just check yourself
00:19:52 onto your chest a little bit.
00:19:54 Slowly back down.
00:19:57 Good, one more.
00:19:58 Up, breathe in on the way down.
00:20:00 Down, and stand.
00:20:12 So my hair's just like yours.
00:20:13 So I want to be just like you.
00:20:15 I want to understand it.
00:20:16 I want to go out with some guys, party till five in the morning.
00:20:20 You know, it's almost Shakespearean, if you think about it,
00:20:24 the levels of betrayal,
00:20:26 and yet they continue to show up to these dinners.
00:20:30 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:34 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:38 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:41 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:45 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:48 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:51 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:54 [indistinct chatter]
00:20:57 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:00 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:03 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:06 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:09 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:12 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:15 What do you mean I have to pick a song?
00:21:17 It's a dating app.
00:21:19 The song plays over a montage of pictures of you.
00:21:23 Well, is there-- thank you-- is there an option not to?
00:21:26 I mean, what kind of songs do people pick?
00:21:29 Radiohead.
00:21:30 An awful lot of creative directors picking Radiohead.
00:21:33 It's only been six months. He doesn't have to do this.
00:21:36 Thank you very much.
00:21:37 Toni Braxton, you're making me high.
00:21:39 Works every time.
00:21:40 How do you know that?
00:21:42 Nabbed me this one, didn't it?
00:21:44 Hmm?
00:21:45 It was the pictures that worked for me.
00:21:47 Can assure you it was the pictures.
00:21:50 Although, had I known what I was getting myself into--
00:21:52 Anyway, I had a legendary slideshow.
00:21:54 Men love a tongue strap. God, I love them.
00:21:57 Mm-hmm.
00:21:58 Oh, you've kept his nudes.
00:22:01 That's so sweet.
00:22:03 Plus, it's fucking romantic.
00:22:05 I'm sorry, I was just looking for photos of you,
00:22:08 and I can't find any of you alone without him,
00:22:10 and I-- it was weird cropping him out.
00:22:14 Do I look older to you? I feel like I've aged a lot.
00:22:17 No.
00:22:18 Yes, your husband just died. You're allowed. My God.
00:22:23 I believe her.
00:22:26 [music playing]
00:22:29 ♪ Sitting here thinking, baby, about you ♪
00:22:40 ♪ I'm wondering how I ever got through my life without you ♪
00:22:46 ♪ Who's that you find ♪
00:22:49 Hi.
00:22:50 Hi.
00:22:51 I think we should go out.
00:22:55 Oh, and, uh, I ended things with Terrence.
00:23:00 What? What happened?
00:23:01 Oh, it was a long time coming, Mark.
00:23:03 You know, and I'm feeling good. I'm feeling great, actually.
00:23:06 It's bringing me down, all of it.
00:23:09 I just refuse to be trapped by the system, you know?
00:23:12 I don't want rules. I don't want threats.
00:23:15 He threatened you?
00:23:16 Who he is threatened me, Mark. Who he is.
00:23:20 I just can't be his kind of wife, you know?
00:23:22 Wife?
00:23:23 I just said I can't be that right now.
00:23:25 He proposed to you.
00:23:26 Terrence proposed?
00:23:27 No, no, no, no.
00:23:28 Apparently they've just broken up.
00:23:30 What?
00:23:31 It's not it. Heart said no. Get dressed.
00:23:34 I told Alistair I'd stop by this art thing.
00:23:37 It's like a group exhibit Christmas party in a warehouse.
00:23:40 Sounds like a nightmare.
00:23:42 Thomas.
00:23:45 Alistair broke up with you last year on your birthday.
00:23:49 Why are you doing this to yourself?
00:23:51 Because I'm thinking of assigning him to the gallery.
00:23:55 And my one true love is chaos.
00:23:57 Fine, too. Mark, come on. Get your shit.
00:23:59 No, I cannot go out tonight. I have work to do.
00:24:02 What the fuck kind of work are you going to do on a Friday night?
00:24:05 My therapist has given me some work to do
00:24:08 in preparation for the anniversary of the time I watched my husband
00:24:12 get pried out of a car like Escargot.
00:24:15 Okay? So...
00:24:16 He's going to be reading all of his Christmas card.
00:24:20 I'm reading the card.
00:24:22 Oh, my God. That fucking card hasn't been opened yet.
00:24:24 That's what I said.
00:24:25 Can you both relax, please?
00:24:27 Marcus.
00:24:29 Lovey.
00:24:31 We have been here for you whenever you've needed us
00:24:35 for almost a year now.
00:24:38 We built you the nest,
00:24:40 and we sat on you for a year.
00:24:44 It's time to hatch, my little puffling.
00:24:47 Open that card, cry it out,
00:24:51 throw on something expensive and meet us there.
00:24:55 Hmm?
00:24:57 We love you.
00:24:59 This is us loving you.
00:25:04 [soft music]
00:25:07 ♪ ♪
00:25:14 [sighs]
00:25:17 ♪ ♪
00:25:25 [sighs]
00:25:27 ♪ ♪
00:25:34 [soft music]
00:25:37 ♪ ♪
00:26:03 [gasps]
00:26:06 [screaming]
00:26:09 ♪ ♪
00:26:16 No, thank you.
00:26:29 Why?
00:26:31 You scared.
00:26:33 Always. You?
00:26:35 Terrified. Of what?
00:26:37 Everything beyond this.
00:26:39 Well, you should be.
00:26:41 And from my experience, all of this
00:26:43 will just leave you dizzy and embarrassed.
00:26:45 ♪ ♪
00:26:48 Dick.
00:26:50 [both grunting]
00:26:53 ♪ ♪
00:27:00 [both grunting]
00:27:03 ♪ ♪
00:27:10 [indistinct chatter]
00:27:13 ♪ ♪
00:27:20 Um, two red wine, please.
00:27:36 ♪ ♪
00:27:42 Thanks.
00:27:44 ♪ ♪
00:27:46 I bought you a drink.
00:27:48 ♪ ♪
00:27:52 Do you make an habit out of pissing off performance artists?
00:27:56 ♪ ♪
00:27:57 You can't say the work is very fresh,
00:27:59 but they're trying, aren't we all?
00:28:01 ♪ ♪
00:28:03 I think they're just looking for company.
00:28:06 Unlike you, it seems.
00:28:08 ♪ ♪
00:28:10 You bought me this drink.
00:28:12 Don't really give me much of a choice.
00:28:14 I can give it to someone else.
00:28:16 There's a man downstairs painting with his cock.
00:28:18 ♪ ♪
00:28:20 Does this mean that you want to keep me company?
00:28:22 Because I can assure you
00:28:25 that is a huge mistake.
00:28:27 ♪ ♪
00:28:33 Do you work in art?
00:28:35 ♪ ♪
00:28:37 I used to paint,
00:28:39 but more recently I've been illustrating children's books.
00:28:42 Why did you stop painting?
00:28:45 That's a big question coming from a stranger.
00:28:47 Oh, apologies.
00:28:49 I can complement your jacket instead.
00:28:52 ♪ ♪
00:28:54 My mom died, and I found it too painful,
00:28:58 so I stopped.
00:29:00 Fun party chat.
00:29:02 And you never thought about painting through it?
00:29:05 No, I'm too tired for masochism.
00:29:08 I don't know.
00:29:10 I don't want to sound like a pretentious asshole,
00:29:12 but is an art a kind of commemoration of pain?
00:29:17 Where does it go otherwise?
00:29:20 You're very lucky you're French.
00:29:22 ♪ ♪
00:29:27 ♪ ♪
00:29:31 I guess I put it into my marriage,
00:29:33 which was a mistake.
00:29:35 So you're married.
00:29:38 I was.
00:29:40 He died as well last year.
00:29:43 Sorry to hear.
00:29:44 Mm.
00:29:46 ♪ ♪
00:29:48 I don't even know your name.
00:29:50 Du.
00:29:52 Mark.
00:29:54 Should I have complemented your jacket?
00:29:57 ♪ ♪
00:29:59 No.
00:30:00 So can I ask you to have a drink with me this week?
00:30:03 I'm here for a few days before heading back to Paris.
00:30:06 ♪ ♪
00:30:08 I don't think so.
00:30:11 But I will put my number in your phone.
00:30:14 ♪ ♪
00:30:21 Their parents bought them this place to keep them busy,
00:30:24 like a big expensive sandbox.
00:30:27 The sad thing is,
00:30:29 they know they're not very good.
00:30:32 ♪ ♪
00:30:35 Marcus!
00:30:37 ♪ ♪
00:30:39 It's nice to meet you.
00:30:41 Mm.
00:30:42 And you, Mark.
00:30:44 ♪ ♪
00:30:45 Where the hell were you?
00:30:47 I've been here 45 minutes.
00:30:50 Who was that?
00:30:53 I don't know.
00:30:55 Mm.
00:30:56 How was everything at home?
00:30:58 Alistair has a new boyfriend.
00:31:01 Brought him tonight.
00:31:02 Waved him around in front of Thomas like a ribbon
00:31:05 in a goddamn rhythmic gymnastics routine.
00:31:07 It was a whole thing.
00:31:09 You didn't know he was seeing somebody?
00:31:11 I'm fine, okay?
00:31:12 It wasn't a whole thing.
00:31:14 I don't care about him.
00:31:16 It was a whole thing.
00:31:17 Meanwhile, I may now be single and unemployed,
00:31:20 but I've lifted the veil and my eyes can see.
00:31:23 I'm sorry, you've lost your job?
00:31:25 I love the fact that you jumped to the conclusion
00:31:27 that I was fired.
00:31:29 Look at these hands.
00:31:30 Hm?
00:31:31 Look at the calluses I have
00:31:32 from lacing up 25 white women's corsets every day.
00:31:35 You studied costume design?
00:31:36 You're working on a Keira Knightley movie.
00:31:38 Precisely.
00:31:39 I need to be doing my own thing.
00:31:42 Guys, I'm feeling really clear,
00:31:45 really free.
00:31:47 She's on molly and a bottle of wine.
00:31:49 I'm fine.
00:31:50 I literally have never felt better.
00:31:53 I might need to stay with you guys for, like,
00:31:55 two weeks to six months
00:31:56 just till I figure out my next move.
00:32:00 It'll be sweet.
00:32:11 ♪ It's the most wonderful time of the year ♪
00:32:18 ♪ When the city's... ♪
00:32:20 I apologize about the restaurant.
00:32:22 The office flooded yesterday.
00:32:24 The place smells like a septic tank.
00:32:28 Thank you.
00:32:29 I hope you got the cheese basket I sent you last week.
00:32:33 I did.
00:32:34 My neighbor appreciated it immensely.
00:32:37 Oh.
00:32:38 I'd have kept it for myself
00:32:39 were it not for the cranes.
00:32:41 Hi, can I get you anything?
00:32:42 A tea.
00:32:43 Green.
00:32:44 Some water.
00:32:45 Thank you.
00:32:47 Now, as we are aware,
00:32:51 Oliver's publishing contract was terminated
00:32:53 when he became unable to fulfill his obligation.
00:32:56 When he died.
00:32:57 Mm.
00:32:58 They've invoiced a substantial amount
00:33:00 to be reimbursed by the end of the year.
00:33:02 I thought it best to discuss strategy
00:33:05 to protect the estate.
00:33:07 To that point, we did notice
00:33:09 some irregular spending on food delivery.
00:33:12 That was me.
00:33:14 Fascinating.
00:33:16 I feel it advantageous to consider pruning
00:33:19 some of yours and Oliver's investments
00:33:22 so as to best safeguard your savings from here on out.
00:33:26 Okay.
00:33:27 Now, the lease on Pied-a-Terre in Paris
00:33:32 is up at the end of the month,
00:33:34 and I recommend--
00:33:35 Pied-a-Terre in Paris?
00:33:37 Leased at the beginning of December of last year.
00:33:43 I assumed you were aware
00:33:45 as some of the charges reflected spending for two.
00:33:49 You were not that second person.
00:33:56 No.
00:33:57 I'm not.
00:34:00 Did he tell you he had met someone else?
00:34:03 I make it my business to know
00:34:05 as little about people as possible.
00:34:07 What am I supposed to say to you?
00:34:09 To my friends?
00:34:12 They've wasted a year of their lives
00:34:15 trying to help me through this.
00:34:18 I have lost a year of my life.
00:34:22 This might not be the best venue for you to--
00:34:25 I'm 38!
00:34:27 I should be in the prime of my life.
00:34:30 [indistinct chatter]
00:34:33 Would you be able to email me
00:34:36 all the information on Paris, please?
00:34:38 I can do that.
00:34:40 Sorry.
00:34:41 Sorry you had to witness all of this.
00:34:45 Sorry.
00:34:47 [indistinct chatter]
00:34:50 [dramatic music]
00:34:53 ♪ ♪
00:34:59 [car horn honks]
00:35:01 Oh, thank you. Sorry.
00:35:04 [indistinct chatter]
00:35:07 [car door closes]
00:35:09 [indistinct chatter]
00:35:12 [sighs]
00:35:15 [indistinct chatter]
00:35:18 [sighs]
00:35:21 What?
00:35:23 Terrence wanted my stuff out.
00:35:25 Are you okay?
00:35:26 Hmm? Yeah.
00:35:28 Just--I wanted it out, you know, and I'm out and good.
00:35:31 Sorry, I don't know what the fuck is going on.
00:35:35 He just wasn't there when I left, you know?
00:35:38 I helped with the bags.
00:35:40 He just wasn't there.
00:35:42 Someone talk about something else, please.
00:35:44 Anything.
00:35:46 Are you sure?
00:35:48 Yes, Mark, please.
00:35:50 Just go.
00:35:51 Okay.
00:35:52 Um, I wanted to thank you both
00:35:56 for this year.
00:35:59 So I would like to take us to Paris for the weekend
00:36:03 on Oliver, spend his money recklessly.
00:36:06 It's what he would be doing if he were there right now.
00:36:09 And I can't think of a more appropriate way
00:36:12 to mark the one-year anniversary.
00:36:15 Yeah.
00:36:16 We all deserve some joy.
00:36:18 Yes, I think this is a beautiful thing.
00:36:21 I think this is a beautiful, soulful thing
00:36:24 you are offering us.
00:36:26 Yes, thank you.
00:36:28 Where are we staying?
00:36:30 You actually have a place there.
00:36:32 What?
00:36:33 Since when?
00:36:35 Oliver got it last year.
00:36:37 I plan on giving it up.
00:36:38 What does it feel like to just casually mention
00:36:41 you're giving up a place in Paris?
00:36:43 Same thing.
00:36:44 Still finding ways to give us nice things.
00:36:47 [upbeat music]
00:36:50 ♪ I'm born out of a hole ♪
00:36:55 ♪ One more bad dream ♪
00:36:58 ♪ Could bring a fall ♪
00:37:02 ♪ When I'm far from home ♪
00:37:06 ♪ Don't call me on the phone ♪
00:37:09 ♪ To tell me you're in love ♪
00:37:13 ♪ It's easy to deceive ♪
00:37:17 ♪ It's easy to tease ♪
00:37:20 ♪ But hard to get released ♪
00:37:23 ♪
00:37:29 ♪ Eyes without a face ♪
00:37:32 ♪
00:37:35 ♪ Eyes without a face ♪
00:37:37 ♪
00:37:40 ♪ Eyes without a face ♪
00:37:43 ♪ Got no human grace ♪
00:37:45 ♪ Your eyes without a face ♪
00:37:49 ♪
00:37:52 ♪
00:37:58 [thud]
00:37:59 [gasps]
00:38:00 [door opens]
00:38:02 [door closes]
00:38:04 Jesus Christ.
00:38:06 [door opens]
00:38:08 [sighs]
00:38:10 Uh, wash?
00:38:13 [door closes]
00:38:14 Jesus.
00:38:16 This place has just been sitting here.
00:38:19 Oh, I get it.
00:38:22 This is sexy.
00:38:25 Oh!
00:38:26 This is where people come to do sex.
00:38:30 Mark doesn't need to be reminded of all this sex
00:38:32 they probably had here.
00:38:34 I don't know. I think it's a bit much.
00:38:36 Of course, you're trying to prove--
00:38:38 Um, that he has really beautiful taste.
00:38:40 That he knows how to create an intensely sensual vibe.
00:38:45 Oh.
00:38:47 And you'll be in love with a couch.
00:38:49 [footsteps]
00:38:52 [soft music]
00:38:55 ♪
00:39:00 ♪
00:39:05 ♪
00:39:10 ♪
00:39:15 ♪
00:39:20 ♪
00:39:25 ♪
00:39:30 ♪
00:39:35 ♪
00:39:40 ♪
00:39:45 ♪
00:39:50 ♪
00:39:55 ♪
00:40:00 ♪
00:40:05 [sighs]
00:40:07 [footsteps]
00:40:10 Sophie is taking the guest bedroom
00:40:12 and is demanding privacy as a 35-year-old single woman.
00:40:17 Didn't she share a tent with a bunch of strangers at Burning Man?
00:40:20 Yeah, she wears logic like one of those little handbags
00:40:23 that can't actually hold anything.
00:40:27 You okay?
00:40:29 Yeah.
00:40:31 Yes. Yes.
00:40:34 [sighs]
00:40:39 It's nice.
00:40:42 ♪
00:40:47 ♪
00:40:52 ♪
00:40:54 I got a date for tonight.
00:40:56 What?
00:40:57 Thomas, before you pass any kind of judgment you're coming with,
00:41:00 he's bringing gays.
00:41:02 Bringing gays?
00:41:04 Why do straight people think their gay friends
00:41:06 will automatically want to sleep with each other?
00:41:08 I set you two up and it worked, didn't it?
00:41:11 Yeah, for a year 15 years ago.
00:41:13 His name is Sebastian. He works in advertising.
00:41:15 He's 6'1". He spends an awful lot of time
00:41:17 in expensive boats, according to his profile.
00:41:20 I told him you'd pick the place since you're paying.
00:41:22 Oh, I'm not paying for that.
00:41:24 Oh, Marcus, I'd very much like for Sebastian
00:41:27 to forget his fucking name when he sees me tonight, okay?
00:41:31 So I think we should start making that happen.
00:41:33 Like now.
00:41:35 Asap.
00:41:37 Things took a turn.
00:41:39 Yep.
00:41:41 She also ashed on the counter.
00:41:43 ♪
00:41:48 ♪
00:41:53 ♪
00:41:58 ♪
00:42:03 ♪
00:42:08 ♪
00:42:13 ♪
00:42:18 ♪
00:42:23 ♪
00:42:28 ♪
00:42:33 ♪
00:42:38 ♪
00:42:43 ♪
00:42:46 Hi.
00:42:48 Um, I would like to exchange this, please.
00:42:50 Thank you.
00:42:52 This is for Oliver Alston?
00:43:03 Yes, O-Oliver Alston bought this.
00:43:07 He spent a lot of money in this store.
00:43:09 Probably hit on you.
00:43:11 Do you know what happened to him?
00:43:12 It's so sad.
00:43:14 He would bring us coffees when he'd come to shop.
00:43:16 You wouldn't happen to remember him coming in here
00:43:22 with another man, would you?
00:43:25 Um, there was a boy, sometimes, uh, younger.
00:43:33 Younger than you.
00:43:35 Maybe a boyfriend, I don't know.
00:43:37 Uh, are you his assistant?
00:43:40 I'm his husband.
00:43:42 And Oliver bought this for that boy, uh, just before he died.
00:43:48 Died in front of me, and not the boyfriend.
00:43:51 Now, I have friends upstairs that would like to buy something in the store,
00:43:54 and I'd like to help pay for that with this item.
00:43:57 So if you could please make an exception.
00:44:00 Unless you'd like to watch me slowly unravel in the store.
00:44:05 OK.
00:44:07 OK. Thank you.
00:44:09 Too intellectual?
00:44:12 Or just...
00:44:14 intellectual enough?
00:44:16 Nice balance.
00:44:18 Smart dress.
00:44:20 And there's you in it.
00:44:22 Ah, one day, my lover man is going to melt that cold, cold part of yours.
00:44:30 He's just going to take a hairdryer to it, I promise you.
00:44:34 I love those glasses.
00:44:36 And the scarf. Get 'em both.
00:44:38 Why not?
00:44:40 I loved that apartment.
00:44:59 You loved that flat?
00:45:00 I loved that apartment.
00:45:02 You two broke up five months in.
00:45:04 I know. Now look at us.
00:45:06 Think about that apartment a lot, actually.
00:45:08 Do you think about the day we moved in?
00:45:10 Oh my God.
00:45:11 What did you find again?
00:45:13 A homemade dildo.
00:45:14 Oh!
00:45:15 Bad.
00:45:16 What was it again? Shampoo?
00:45:18 It was a perfume bottle that someone had wrapped in a condom.
00:45:22 In their defense, those women had a reputation for being very messy and forgetful prostitutes.
00:45:28 Are we ever going to talk about Terrence?
00:45:32 See, that's the problem. Everyone wants to talk about Terrence.
00:45:37 I want to talk about me.
00:45:39 Oh, okay. Let's talk about you.
00:45:42 Thank you.
00:45:43 Okay, well...
00:45:47 I want to ride that thing at some point.
00:45:52 And I want to have fun tonight.
00:45:56 I want someone to look at me like I'm fresh out the box.
00:45:59 Is that too much to ask?
00:46:01 No.
00:46:02 You liked that flat.
00:46:04 I remember one night when Sophie had gotten back from that bar that she worked at that one summer.
00:46:10 And you and I were in a good place.
00:46:12 And we had won that Elton John CD from the pub quiz across the street.
00:46:16 And we put it on and we opened all the windows because that place was like a steam room.
00:46:22 We all laid on the bed just hoping for a breeze.
00:46:26 And there was a moment when the bass from those guys downstairs remixed perfectly with "This Train Don't Stop There Anymore."
00:46:34 You remember the weirdest shit.
00:46:35 No, and we were all convinced that we were having the same heat-induced hallucination.
00:46:40 But we weren't.
00:46:41 It was just a beautiful memory in that apartment.
00:46:49 Was that the night I spilled my red wine over those awful pointy shoes you wore all the time and you cried?
00:46:56 Fuck off.
00:46:57 How do I look?
00:47:10 Like you didn't pay for that dress.
00:47:13 Oh, here he is.
00:47:15 Bonjour.
00:47:19 That's all the French.
00:47:21 I know.
00:47:22 These are my friends, Marc.
00:47:24 Bonjour.
00:47:26 And Thomas.
00:47:27 This is Thomas. Thomas is fine.
00:47:29 This is Esme.
00:47:31 And Remy.
00:47:32 Bonjour.
00:47:33 Bonjour.
00:47:34 So, what are we drinking?
00:47:42 Wine.
00:47:43 Excusez-moi.
00:47:47 So how do you all know each other?
00:47:49 We work together.
00:47:50 I started yesterday.
00:47:52 You've known these people for a day.
00:47:55 Yes, but Seb asked the office we wanted to get laid tonight and I thought, why not?
00:48:00 You want?
00:48:04 Yeah.
00:48:05 Oh, okay.
00:48:07 Seb told me your husband is dead.
00:48:16 Um, he is, yeah.
00:48:18 And he was killed.
00:48:19 He was, yeah.
00:48:23 Not like murdered, though.
00:48:25 My uncle was murdered.
00:48:27 Oh my God.
00:48:28 He worked in constriction and we later found out he was mixed up in the mafia.
00:48:33 Burned alive.
00:48:35 Wow.
00:48:37 I'm sorry.
00:48:44 You must miss him.
00:48:45 It's complicated.
00:48:49 Yeah.
00:48:50 Love is that way.
00:48:52 Excusez-moi.
00:48:54 Oh, are you ready to order?
00:48:56 Yes, I want meat.
00:49:12 I have a very strong point of view, you know?
00:49:16 And I will not apologize for that.
00:49:19 I can't keep working under people.
00:49:22 I need to take charge of my life.
00:49:26 What is she doing?
00:49:27 You need to do what makes you feel good inside.
00:49:29 Exactly.
00:49:31 And only you know.
00:49:32 Only I know.
00:49:35 Okay, alright.
00:49:36 In theory, okay, but I thought I'd have my own gallery by now.
00:49:40 That's also life.
00:49:41 Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do to get to where you want to go.
00:49:45 No, no, you don't get it.
00:49:46 You don't get it.
00:49:47 Does he not get it or are you not willing to hear him?
00:49:51 Says the boy who worked for his husband.
00:49:53 Okay, I will not feel bad about working with my husband.
00:50:02 Lily fucking Kane would not have a career if it weren't for my illustration, so...
00:50:07 Babes, babes, babes.
00:50:09 I would kill for what you have.
00:50:12 Own it.
00:50:13 Who ordered these?
00:50:30 You did.
00:50:31 Send them over.
00:50:32 Because that's just what you need.
00:50:33 Okay.
00:50:34 To doing what makes you feel good inside.
00:50:39 You're going to find out what a good singer I am.
00:50:53 I can't wait to see that.
00:50:54 I'll be there.
00:50:55 Will you?
00:50:57 Mm-hmm.
00:50:58 Super.
00:51:06 [Music]
00:51:18 [Singing]
00:51:31 Uh-oh.
00:51:33 [Singing]
00:51:49 Well, it's 2 a.m., which means that my husband officially died a year ago today.
00:51:55 Such a meticulous person he left behind one hell of a mess.
00:52:00 [Music]
00:52:03 This is for him.
00:52:04 And for you.
00:52:07 And her.
00:52:09 [Singing]
00:52:29 [Singing]
00:52:58 [Singing]
00:53:21 Anymore.
00:53:23 [Music]
00:53:39 Your tongue is blue.
00:53:41 I'm that drinks are blue.
00:53:44 And I'm only just realizing how this must look to someone I've only met once.
00:53:49 I'm not normally like this.
00:53:52 Besides shoving your blue tongue down my throat and knocking my head against the wall, you're not that bad.
00:54:01 I don't know what that was.
00:54:03 It felt sexy.
00:54:05 It felt like a sexy thing to do.
00:54:07 Would you like to give your tongue some air?
00:54:11 Yeah.
00:54:15 Give me a second.
00:54:16 [Music]
00:54:27 Hey, where are you going?
00:54:29 I'm going to go for a walk.
00:54:30 No, sit down.
00:54:32 No, I'll be right back.
00:54:33 I'll be right back. Have fun.
00:54:35 [Music]
00:54:40 What?
00:54:41 [Music]
00:54:45 I thought I wouldn't hear from you.
00:54:53 I also thought that.
00:54:56 But things change.
00:54:58 Oh, wow.
00:54:59 What changed for you?
00:55:01 A lot.
00:55:02 I guess I felt lonely.
00:55:10 I don't know if that's a rude thing to say to you.
00:55:12 Or is it rude?
00:55:14 Well, I feel like I might take offense to that.
00:55:18 Like, the only reason someone wanted to get in touch was because they felt alone and wanted company.
00:55:24 Like, the reason for getting in touch wasn't romantic enough.
00:55:30 It's practical.
00:55:31 And what's wrong with that?
00:55:33 You were lonely. You thought of me.
00:55:36 I think that's kind of romantic.
00:55:39 These days, everybody needs a parade to show how much they care about each other.
00:55:43 Well, a lot of people are insecure.
00:55:48 Like, you're not very confident.
00:55:52 Without being arrogant, which is a very hard thing to pull off.
00:55:56 I think arrogant people have something to prove.
00:55:59 Don't we all have something to prove to somebody?
00:56:04 Yeah, sure.
00:56:05 I'd just rather be up front about it.
00:56:07 What about us?
00:56:08 I think a lot of people would like to be up front about a lot of things.
00:56:14 But honesty doesn't just spill out of a lot of people.
00:56:19 It should.
00:56:21 They haven't changed their recipe in 65 years.
00:56:30 How are you feeling now?
00:56:32 I'm alright.
00:56:35 If the waiter came by and asked you what you thought about the soup and you said, "alright,"
00:56:40 they would ask us to leave.
00:56:42 And no, they would probably be asking us why we're eating French Indian soup on a date.
00:56:49 Is this a date?
00:56:50 I don't know. You tell me.
00:56:53 You seem like a very transparent person.
00:56:56 What does it mean?
00:56:58 That you don't look like you lie a lot.
00:57:00 I don't know. I try not to lie.
00:57:05 Hmm.
00:57:06 I've been lying for a long time.
00:57:15 To a lot of people.
00:57:18 And it feels really heavy.
00:57:22 Like I'm swimming with my clothes on and I can't take them off.
00:57:30 I'll stop liking my job but I keep working because it pays well.
00:57:34 And that makes me feel sick.
00:57:37 But not sick enough to quit.
00:57:40 Which makes me feel even more sick.
00:57:44 You should quit your job.
00:57:47 Yes.
00:57:48 I'm not sure I'm ready for it.
00:57:52 I'm not sure I'm ready for it.
00:57:56 Yes.
00:57:57 What are you doing?
00:58:00 I'm trying to take your clothes off.
00:58:02 I just told you something truthful.
00:58:06 Now it's your turn to tell me something that's not a lie.
00:58:10 I'll try not to judge.
00:58:13 [silence]
00:58:16 I feel like I abandoned my mom when I met my husband.
00:58:33 Like I chose a distraction over sitting alone with her death or something.
00:58:42 Didn't take the time to grieve.
00:58:44 Or...
00:58:46 Live with the reality that she's gone.
00:58:50 I didn't do that.
00:58:52 I opted out.
00:58:55 I mean...
00:58:57 Stopped painting. I avoided things that would remind me of her even though...
00:59:02 All I want is to be reminded of her.
00:59:10 And I can feel myself doing the same thing with Oliver.
00:59:15 I agreed to an open marriage.
00:59:24 Out of fear.
00:59:26 Not trust.
00:59:28 He asked and...
00:59:31 The idea of giving him a reason to leave felt scarier than keeping him happy so that's what I did.
00:59:40 There were rules and work trips. One and done.
00:59:44 I don't want to hear about it.
00:59:46 But he broke those rules.
00:59:51 And I can...
00:59:54 I can feel myself choosing hunger...
01:00:00 To distract from...
01:00:08 From how much I miss him.
01:00:10 All I want is to be able to have that fight with him.
01:00:17 You should start painting again.
01:00:19 I think. I've also been told I overstep.
01:00:23 It's a terrible game.
01:00:26 It's a shame your city's so ugly.
01:00:33 I know.
01:00:34 Yeah, it's a real problem.
01:00:35 Yeah.
01:00:37 I should move.
01:00:38 What are we doing?
01:00:43 Surprise.
01:00:46 Just wait.
01:00:52 Okay.
01:00:53 [music]
01:00:55 [knock on door]
01:00:57 [speaking French]
01:01:05 [speaking French]
01:01:17 No, I have not.
01:01:19 Always wanted to.
01:01:21 Thank God.
01:01:23 [door slams]
01:01:24 Monet lost two wives and his son.
01:01:44 And was losing his sight when he painted these.
01:01:49 We are standing in a house of loss.
01:01:52 Wow.
01:01:57 He wins.
01:02:00 This is how someone chooses to remember the things he loved.
01:02:05 It's quite special, no?
01:02:08 It's amazing.
01:02:11 Imagine being able to do this.
01:02:13 You can do this.
01:02:15 I can't. No, I can't do this.
01:02:19 No, you can't do this.
01:02:21 Because this has already been done.
01:02:24 Pretty successfully.
01:02:26 But you can do something.
01:02:31 You can do something.
01:02:34 You can do something.
01:02:36 You can do something.
01:02:39 [music]
01:02:41 You're very nice to me.
01:02:53 It's intentional.
01:03:08 I'm sorry about your husband.
01:03:09 And your mum.
01:03:11 [music]
01:03:23 [music]
01:03:25 Hello?
01:03:49 [music]
01:03:51 Hello?
01:03:59 [music]
01:04:01 [music]
01:04:03 Where were you?
01:04:30 Relax, Wichita.
01:04:32 Where did you go?
01:04:34 I went for a walk. Why? What's going on?
01:04:39 Long walk.
01:04:40 Yeah, it was a long walk. What's the problem?
01:04:45 I had to pay for everyone's bill at karaoke.
01:04:47 Okay, I'll obviously pay you back for the karaoke bill.
01:04:51 It's not the point. I mean, it is and yes, you will.
01:04:53 You said you'd come back. You didn't come back.
01:04:55 Sophie couldn't talk by the end of the night.
01:04:59 And?
01:05:00 And, while I was paying 1500 euro for everyone's bill,
01:05:02 she fucking left, never picked up her phone again
01:05:04 for the rest of the night.
01:05:05 I told you I left her at the bar.
01:05:06 Okay, I don't get where this is going.
01:05:08 She leaves with a guy and none of us know.
01:05:10 You were gone. Sure, maybe I'd taken a pill,
01:05:14 maybe I was a bit drunk, but I'm sorry,
01:05:16 when I don't hear back from our best friend
01:05:17 after something like that, I'm gonna get scared.
01:05:19 Okay, okay. Makes sense.
01:05:21 But you could have taken home that little thing
01:05:23 from last night and had this entire place to yourself.
01:05:26 Clearly, we were fine.
01:05:28 Were we?
01:05:29 Sophie, do you want to tell him where you ended up last night?
01:05:32 Hello?
01:05:34 Thomas, I'm sorry.
01:05:37 Okay, I appreciate you. Can we just move on?
01:05:40 Sophie was picked up by the police.
01:05:42 She was found sleeping near a bus shelter
01:05:45 half an hour outside the city.
01:05:47 So, while you were napping, I was with her, dealing with that.
01:05:53 Are you okay?
01:05:56 Yes.
01:06:00 I'm here, aren't I?
01:06:04 I honestly don't know when I became the only friend
01:06:06 on this fucking trip.
01:06:07 Okay, okay.
01:06:09 Thomas, I am sorry that you had to go through that.
01:06:14 Are you still on the drugs?
01:06:18 I'm not.
01:06:21 Are you still on the drugs?
01:06:23 I'm just trying to...
01:06:26 How is it your husband dying has only made you
01:06:28 even more of a spoiled brat?
01:06:30 Hello?
01:06:40 I'm sorry.
01:06:42 I think I have the wrong apartment.
01:06:46 How did your key let you into this one?
01:06:49 I'm sorry. I didn't think anyone would be here.
01:06:52 So, what the fuck is going on? Who are you?
01:06:54 I'm Luca.
01:06:57 Do you want to tell them or would you like me to?
01:07:06 Oliver met someone else.
01:07:12 What do you mean?
01:07:13 That's what this is.
01:07:14 Hold on, hold on.
01:07:15 Oliver gave this kid the keys to your apartment.
01:07:18 I need to know you...
01:07:19 It's not our apartment.
01:07:21 It's Oliver's apartment.
01:07:25 And yours, presumably?
01:07:27 No.
01:07:28 I only found out about all of this very recently,
01:07:32 and if I'm being honest,
01:07:34 it was just all too pathetic.
01:07:36 But I needed to see this place before I gave it up,
01:07:40 and I...
01:07:42 I wanted to do something about it.
01:07:44 I wanted to do something nice for you both.
01:07:46 It's the lying that's pathetic, Mark.
01:07:47 Thomas.
01:07:48 I shouldn't be here.
01:07:49 I'm just in the middle of something.
01:07:50 Is there anything you can do on your own?
01:07:53 You had to drag us out here to what will keep you company
01:07:57 while you scope out your husband's double life.
01:07:59 I opened Oliver's Christmas card.
01:08:01 He told me he had met someone else.
01:08:03 I fell apart.
01:08:04 I made a bad call.
01:08:06 I do want to spend time with you.
01:08:09 This was never supposed to be...
01:08:10 It wasn't like that.
01:08:11 He wrote that in the card.
01:08:12 You pretended like you'd been here before.
01:08:15 Thomas, it's like an ache right here.
01:08:18 What is?
01:08:19 Loss.
01:08:21 It's like a little ulcer right here that never goes away.
01:08:27 And you somehow figure out ways to take your mind off it enough
01:08:32 to not feel it as much.
01:08:35 But yeah, sometimes you lose sight of what's going on around you
01:08:39 because you just...
01:08:41 You just want to be able to breathe the way you did before.
01:08:46 So, yeah, I messed up.
01:08:52 And I'm sorry for being a spoiled brat.
01:08:56 I'm just trying to figure out how to live with the reality
01:09:00 that my husband died...
01:09:03 leaving me.
01:09:06 To get back to this.
01:09:08 This.
01:09:11 [sighs]
01:09:13 I'm sorry you're having to deal with that,
01:09:21 but I'm allowed to feel things too.
01:09:24 I think you should go.
01:09:27 I don't have anywhere to go tonight.
01:09:37 Can I at least stay here until I figure out where to go?
01:09:41 I can wait in the bathroom.
01:09:43 Oh, my God, he's not hiding in the fucking bathroom.
01:09:45 I'm sorry, don't you live here?
01:09:47 I live in Berlin.
01:09:48 Then how did you meet my husband?
01:09:50 If there is another apartment in Berlin--
01:09:52 I live in Berlin, but I dance a lot in Paris.
01:09:54 I won Oliver's art scholarship.
01:09:56 I was performing in Paris last year,
01:09:59 and Oliver came backstage after the show to introduce himself.
01:10:02 Yeah, I'm sure he did.
01:10:04 We met at the church, and then we just--
01:10:07 Well, where are you gonna go?
01:10:09 Well, he can't stay here.
01:10:10 He's got nowhere else to go, Mark.
01:10:11 I know that!
01:10:12 I am not the bad person in this situation!
01:10:15 I mean, what, is he supposed to stay here with us?
01:10:32 [alarm beeping]
01:10:34 Can I help?
01:10:38 No.
01:10:39 Can you not do that inside, please?
01:10:43 Sorry, the fucking atmosphere in this room is strangling me.
01:10:47 Can I have a drink?
01:10:49 It's too good.
01:10:50 It's okay?
01:10:54 A cigarette at dinner?
01:10:55 I didn't know he'd woken up in 1988.
01:10:59 [soft music]
01:11:01 [sighs]
01:11:16 Wow.
01:11:20 [soft music]
01:11:22 I'm sorry, I--
01:11:30 I don't even know what this is.
01:11:32 I'm sorry, everybody, I've messed up.
01:11:38 Should someone say something before we eat?
01:11:42 Thomas, I really don't think the Lord should be allowed
01:11:44 anywhere near this food.
01:11:46 I think he was talking about Oliver.
01:11:49 I'm sorry.
01:11:51 I'm sorry.
01:11:57 I'm sorry.
01:12:04 It's fine.
01:12:09 Mark, fuck.
01:12:11 Can you just let it not be fine for me, please?
01:12:16 Just let it not be fine.
01:12:18 Let me apologize for fucking up tonight.
01:12:25 Because if I don't, we'll just move past it like we always do.
01:12:30 Thomas, I'm sorry about last night.
01:12:43 I'm sorry for brushing off your feelings.
01:12:46 And I'm really sorry I scared you.
01:12:52 I don't know you, but I'm sorry you have to listen to this.
01:13:05 Oh, Mark, I'm sorry.
01:13:10 We should be out dancing right now.
01:13:13 That's what he would have wanted.
01:13:16 And I know he did some shady shit to you.
01:13:21 You have to know that Oliver loved you so hard.
01:13:26 For so long.
01:13:32 And he's never been the same.
01:13:38 And I'm sorry he's not here anymore.
01:13:41 I miss him.
01:13:53 I miss him.
01:13:55 I miss him.
01:14:00 Oh, my gosh.
01:14:10 [sighs]
01:14:12 He expected more from us.
01:14:36 To the fucking pain.
01:14:39 You...
01:14:49 [music playing]
01:14:51 Terrence left me.
01:15:10 And I deserved it.
01:15:16 [music playing]
01:15:18 I need some air.
01:15:26 [music playing]
01:15:28 [music playing]
01:15:30 Okay, we're on the first wheel. Can you tell us what's going on?
01:15:54 Jesus, Thomas, you're intense.
01:15:56 [music playing]
01:15:58 Terrence got tired of waiting for me to wake the fuck up.
01:16:04 I had to blame...
01:16:07 ...him a lot.
01:16:10 All this time, I thought Terrence was too safe for me.
01:16:18 But he wasn't safe.
01:16:24 He was safety.
01:16:26 And that's the part I wasn't getting.
01:16:30 Because I'm a lot.
01:16:36 I'm a 35-year-old woman who had a good man and loved her,
01:16:43 and I chose a bus stop.
01:16:52 If that's what makes you feel any better,
01:16:54 I don't think anyone actually has their shit together.
01:16:57 Okay, that's where I disagree.
01:16:59 I think people can have their shit together
01:17:01 and live lives that aren't a total mess.
01:17:04 And be kind to people and be generous to people
01:17:08 and want good things for people.
01:17:10 So, no, I think that's a cop-out.
01:17:12 And I think it's what's keeping you both from realizing
01:17:14 your behavior has hurt people.
01:17:16 See, when I asked for the Jeep, Tom--
01:17:18 Okay, is this because I left early last night?
01:17:20 Why is the bigger picture?
01:17:22 What's the bigger picture, Thomas?
01:17:29 There isn't a bigger picture, okay?
01:17:32 Can we get off this thing?
01:17:33 Why is it that you only get this on edge
01:17:36 when he's let you down?
01:17:38 Why is it only him?
01:17:46 People feel things that are inconvenient, Thomas.
01:17:51 It happens.
01:17:53 It sucks, but it happens.
01:17:58 That's okay.
01:18:01 It's never me.
01:18:07 And I don't know why.
01:18:15 Not just with you. It's just never me.
01:18:19 I'm never the one.
01:18:23 It's like people can smell it on me.
01:18:29 It could be so easy for us, you know?
01:18:39 I know.
01:18:41 I know.
01:18:43 But it wasn't.
01:18:45 And that's not on you.
01:18:48 It's on us.
01:18:50 I think I just need to go home,
01:18:56 and we should lay low for a bit.
01:18:58 What?
01:18:59 I don't want it to be a big dramatic thing
01:19:00 on a Ferris wheel in Paris.
01:19:02 You're right.
01:19:05 People don't have their shit together.
01:19:08 But I think for our sake,
01:19:12 we have to try harder.
01:19:15 No, no.
01:19:29 No, no, no, no, no.
01:19:31 Why do we go again?
01:19:33 We're going again.
01:19:34 No, no, no, he's putting us through again.
01:19:36 Fucking hell.
01:19:42 So, what time are you planning on heading back?
01:19:45 There's trains at the hour, so whenever I can.
01:19:47 I'll come with.
01:19:49 I've got some stuff to do at home.
01:19:51 Unless you want me to stay.
01:19:53 No, I'm fine. Do what you need to do.
01:19:55 I think I'm going to take this.
01:20:04 Okay.
01:20:09 I'll see you back in London.
01:20:11 I'll text you when we get home.
01:20:13 Okay.
01:20:15 I love you.
01:20:25 I love you.
01:20:27 La plus tard.
01:20:43 Sebastian taught me that last night
01:20:45 when I left his house crying.
01:20:47 Get one last look at this hot fucking mess, my friends.
01:20:52 She has served us well.
01:20:55 [indistinct chatter]
01:20:58 [knocking]
01:21:20 Hi.
01:21:23 Come in.
01:21:25 Should I take my shoes off?
01:21:28 Okay.
01:21:30 So...
01:21:34 Well?
01:21:40 Everything came out, and my friends are going home.
01:21:47 It went over well.
01:21:52 Really, really well, yeah.
01:21:54 I'm sorry to hear.
01:21:57 I think it was an inevitability.
01:22:01 It's a lot of love and...
01:22:06 misplaced sadness.
01:22:08 You just described half of Paris.
01:22:13 [sighs]
01:22:15 [soft music]
01:22:24 ♪ ♪
01:22:31 Hi.
01:22:48 Hi.
01:22:51 [sighs]
01:22:53 He got you a Christmas present.
01:22:57 I took it back.
01:23:01 I'm sorry.
01:23:19 He loved you very much.
01:23:21 I don't even know what we were doing.
01:23:24 He didn't want to leave you.
01:23:27 Hmm?
01:23:28 He didn't want to leave his marriage.
01:23:30 He was planning on talking to you about this--
01:23:33 Our marriage.
01:23:35 Yes. I'm sorry.
01:23:38 I knew it wasn't worth all this.
01:23:41 You know...
01:23:45 I have never met anyone who was so curious about me.
01:23:49 He was curious about everyone and everything.
01:23:53 That's why being the one to hold his curiosity felt so good.
01:23:58 I miss that.
01:24:01 A lot.
01:24:04 [sighs]
01:24:07 So have you been staying here--
01:24:09 No.
01:24:10 No, he had only just gotten it.
01:24:12 For work, I think.
01:24:15 And it wasn't like that.
01:24:18 I don't blame you for feeling something for my husband.
01:24:33 It's hard not to.
01:24:43 Hug might be pushing it, you know?
01:24:46 Yeah. I understand.
01:24:50 So the estate agent called to say they'd like to list the London house next week.
01:25:11 Okay.
01:25:12 You're okay with that?
01:25:14 I am, yeah.
01:25:15 That house isn't mine. It was always his.
01:25:18 I feel like you're not into this idea.
01:25:23 My opinion is of little relevance here.
01:25:26 Well, you manage my finances. I'm selling my house.
01:25:28 Your opinion isn't irrelevant.
01:25:31 I trust you're not running away...
01:25:38 from him.
01:25:40 I mean...
01:25:42 My wife died 12 years ago this month.
01:25:53 I ran...
01:25:56 from her.
01:25:58 From us.
01:26:05 Physiology has a clever way of protecting us from what we perceive to be a threat...
01:26:11 to our bodies.
01:26:13 Which is why the more we close ourselves off...
01:26:16 the less we feel.
01:26:19 At the time, that benefited me. I got on with it.
01:26:23 Went back to school.
01:26:25 Studied finance.
01:26:28 Built up a successful business.
01:26:31 Nice house.
01:26:34 Good clothes.
01:26:37 Never having desired anyone else.
01:26:40 And you can't survive that way...
01:26:44 until the usualness of it all starts creeping in.
01:26:49 And the new life you'd built as a refuge...
01:26:53 begins to feel like a void.
01:27:03 Because then it turns out...
01:27:06 to avoid sadness...
01:27:11 is also to avoid love.
01:27:19 That hindsight is a discomfort that you will forever mistake for indigestion.
01:27:33 [music]
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01:28:36 [music]
01:28:39 Listen, I've been hustling to get that trust back, but he's not making it easy.
01:28:42 Is he playing games?
01:28:44 No.
01:28:46 All the feelings are still there.
01:28:49 He says he still wants to marry me.
01:28:52 Eventually.
01:28:54 So if that's gonna happen one day...
01:28:57 he needs to know they're in good, you know?
01:29:00 I get it.
01:29:02 It's a miracle he's not the worst.
01:29:04 Oh my God, Biblical.
01:29:06 Oof. Better than it was, huh?
01:29:09 Have you talked to Thomas?
01:29:14 I have.
01:29:16 I actually sent him up on the app.
01:29:19 Big step.
01:29:21 Oh, huge.
01:29:23 There's an offering on the house.
01:29:32 Oh, fuck you!
01:29:34 I will have a guest room ready for you at the new house.
01:29:37 If you think I'm taking an hour-long train ride just to see you, you're out of your tiny mind.
01:29:41 I need to be somewhere else.
01:29:43 I want to paint alone in a room overlooking the ocean like some sad lesbian in a period drama.
01:29:50 Oh, Glessie, please let me have that.
01:29:53 End of an era, huh?
01:29:57 Huge.
01:29:59 Proud of you.
01:30:01 I'm proud of you.
01:30:03 But I'm serious.
01:30:07 You're going to be coming up here more than I'm going to be going there, you know?
01:30:10 Sober and selfish.
01:30:12 Oh my God, that's the title of my memoir.
01:30:15 I love you.
01:30:18 [music]
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01:32:00 It's for you.
01:32:02 Wow, I should hope so.
01:32:06 He, uh...
01:32:09 He was a beauty, wasn't he?
01:32:12 That was almost annoying.
01:32:15 You'd have loved this, Mark.
01:32:20 Thank you.
01:32:23 Really.
01:32:27 Hmm.
01:32:29 [gasps]
01:32:32 Get out of town!
01:32:34 Oh, I don't believe it.
01:32:36 Look!
01:32:37 Look!
01:32:39 [laughs]
01:32:40 I love it, you're a genius.
01:32:43 Oh, I'm glad you like it.
01:32:44 Oh my God, well done.
01:32:46 It's nice to see this thing back on track.
01:32:51 Let me see the ring, let me see the ring.
01:32:53 Things are never on track with this one, but it's back and it's on.
01:32:59 [laughs]
01:33:00 Okay, just because your face is on this wall does not mean that you can touch or take home any of the paintings.
01:33:06 What?
01:33:07 Hands by our sides at all times.
01:33:09 We have some gorgeous sparkling water here for you tonight.
01:33:12 Thank you, darling man.
01:33:14 Really wonderful.
01:33:20 Really cool.
01:33:21 [indistinct chatter]
01:33:25 [indistinct chatter]
01:33:52 Glad you came.
01:33:54 Well, considering how many times I've begged you to start painting again, you're lucky I didn't come out of spite.
01:33:59 I heard I make a cameo in this show without my written consent.
01:34:03 Welcoming lawsuits as Christmas presents.
01:34:06 You're even better than I remember.
01:34:17 It's a step.
01:34:21 All right, honey.
01:34:22 I brought my boyfriend, I hope that's okay.
01:34:26 We went with boyfriend, not partner. I had my money on partner.
01:34:29 Oh, fuck off.
01:34:31 Ben.
01:34:33 Ben.
01:34:34 Oh, it's very nice to meet you.
01:34:36 Thank you for coming.
01:34:37 Just meeting Ben?
01:34:40 Yeah.
01:34:41 Hiya pals-o.
01:34:43 Hello.
01:34:44 See, wasn't there.
01:34:47 Have we seen the ring?
01:34:49 Oh yeah, I don't know about that.
01:34:51 See me? See me? See me?
01:34:52 Yes.
01:34:53 [indistinct chatter]
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