Queer singer/songwriter Rett Madison's new album, "One for Jackie," is about love and loss. "[The album] is predominantly about my journey through grief and mourning. My mother who passed away, Jackie, in 2019... There's a few other songs that I have in there that are about meeting my partner that I'm still with currently and falling in love in the midst of grief. But there's definitely that through line, through every song, of that chapter of mourning my mom and reconciling with her no longer being here." Madison also speaks on love, sharing queer stories, and connecting with her fans.
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00:00 Hi, I'm Rhett Madison and I'm a singer, songwriter, and artist.
00:04 Before we talk about your new album, which I'm so excited to get into,
00:07 I just wanted to know if we could learn a little bit more about you
00:10 and how you got into the music industry, how you fell in love with writing and performing.
00:15 So I grew up in West Virginia.
00:17 I was very lucky to have supportive parents who encouraged me
00:20 and my early interest for music since I was a pretty young kid.
00:25 And then I would say around like 12 or 13 maybe,
00:28 I started to really get into writing songs.
00:32 I just kind of gravitated towards it as kind of like a therapeutic outlet.
00:37 And then a few years later into my teens, I feel like I had some clarity and was like,
00:43 "I think I really want to try to make this my living if I can.
00:46 I love writing music. I love performing.
00:48 And I would really like to get serious about this and pursue it as a professional."
00:54 And then a few years later, I ended up in Los Angeles
00:55 and I've been trying to make a career with music from 18 onwards ever since.
01:00 And I just wanted to ask, I mean, your lyrics are so honest and so open.
01:06 Did you ever have any worries when you were just starting out
01:08 about how much you really wanted to share?
01:10 Because I don't think people realize how personal it can really be to create music.
01:15 Yeah. I think for me, again, because songwriting really started as something
01:21 that was almost like a diary entry for myself
01:24 and it was a very therapeutic process for me to express my emotions in that way.
01:29 I feel like I was really writing the songs from a place which I needed to heal myself first.
01:37 And then I figured, you know what, if this has helped me just to express what I'm going through,
01:42 why not share it with more people?
01:43 Even though that can be intimidating, I've found that being vulnerable and being open
01:48 tended to connect with people and tended to comfort other people.
01:51 And it felt more like kind of an act of service in that way.
01:55 So I feel like I don't know.
01:57 I don't know if there was ever a moment where I was worried necessarily
02:02 how much I was sharing through the music.
02:05 I think it felt pretty natural, I think, for me, for myself personally.
02:09 Yeah. I mean, I just know that some people, even especially with like putting queer themes
02:14 into songs can be intimidating because you're kind of isolating yourself within the music industry.
02:18 Once you share those kind of feelings, you worry like, am I not going to be able to get gigs
02:23 and stuff like that, which is the horrible truth of today.
02:26 So since you have put queer themes into your songs and have shared that intimate experience,
02:31 how has it been connecting with your audience on that level?
02:35 Yeah, I think it's been very, for me personally, it's been very rewarding to go play shows
02:41 and sing so openly about my own queerness and my own experiences
02:46 and meet people afterwards that resonate with those topics and messages, especially younger people.
02:51 I think the older I get, I feel like there's this sense within myself that I want to continue
02:56 to speak openly about my queerness and about my formative experiences as a queer person through my art
03:01 because I wanted to reach younger queer people, you know, that are grappling with, you know,
03:06 their identities or coming out or being queer within their communities,
03:10 because I remember what it was like when I was a younger person going through that myself.
03:13 So I just want to be a voice, my own voice obviously, I'm putting my own voice out there,
03:17 but if it resonates with other people and younger people, I don't know,
03:21 that's the most rewarding part of it, I would say.
03:24 Absolutely. And right before we jump in to your album, I just wanted to ask,
03:29 who are some of your musical inspirations that kind of shape or, you know, help make your music?
03:34 I'm a big fan. I mean, I'm a fan of so many people. I love Stevie Nick, Sheryl Crow, Dolly Parton.
03:42 Yeah, I mean, there's so many artists that I adore, but those are the first three that just popped into my mind recently
03:46 that I've really been listening to a lot.
03:48 Yeah, those are great. Definitely listening to your music, I get that Fleetwood Mac vibe and I love it.
03:53 Like, they're definitely right in there with my playlists. So tell us about "One for Jackie."
03:59 So "One for Jackie" is an album, my second album, that's predominantly about my journey through grief
04:07 and mourning my mother who passed away, Jackie, in 2019.
04:12 And yeah, I mean, that's the main through point of the record.
04:16 There's a few other songs that I have in there that are about meeting my partner that I'm still with currently
04:22 and falling in love in the midst of grief.
04:24 But there's definitely that through line through every song of, yeah, just that chapter of mourning my mom
04:30 and reconciling with her no longer being here.
04:33 And do you have a memory that you can share about recording this album?
04:36 I mean, it clearly means a lot to you to have those kind of memories that you're bringing into it.
04:40 So how was the recording process?
04:43 The recording process was honestly really magical.
04:46 I also, I'm kind of a hippie. I felt like my mom's presence was probably with me while I was making this record.
04:54 My mom was a big fan of leopard print, like always wore it, was always dressed in leopard.
05:00 She'd wear big black sunglasses, kind of like chain smoke.
05:03 Like that was kind of her aesthetic, I would say. And unknown to myself and unknown to my producer,
05:09 when we walked into the studio, the room we were recording out of the studio down in Texas called Sonic Ranch,
05:16 the door separating the control room from the area where the band was recording was covered in leopard print fabric.
05:22 And I just felt immediately like, you know, and I feel like this is a nod, a wink from my mom that we ended up in this room specifically.
05:29 And all of them, so there was that element, like feeling like my mom was with us.
05:33 And also the musicians that I had with me were so sensitive to the subject matter.
05:38 Some of them could relate to that kind of loss personally in their own ways.
05:43 And I just felt very supported to really, you know, delve into some heavy subject matter.
05:50 But I just I felt carried through it. You know what I mean?
05:52 I felt like I had those musicians were a community around me that week.
05:56 And it was really healing for me.
05:58 Again, I keep saying this, but it was a very therapeutic experience for me and also felt like there was this element of my mom.
06:04 I don't know, also kind of being present with us while we made it.
06:07 Absolutely. That's so beautiful to see.
06:09 I know you have that leopard print also like weaved into the song lyrics.
06:13 You know, it's definitely a big theme. So that's so awesome to hear.
06:17 And I used to share it a little bit about how this has been a therapeutic experience for you.
06:22 But what do you hope audiences take away when they finally get to hear it?
06:25 My main hope and takeaway for folks that are listening to this album,
06:30 especially folks that are currently mourning a loved one, is that they just I hope they feel less alone after listening to this record.
06:36 I remember while I was really in the midst of those early phases of grieving my mom,
06:42 how much I clung to the discographies and songs of other artists that were candidly speaking about grief.
06:48 And even though I was in so much pain and I was so sad, you know, just to hear another artist,
06:54 I don't know, speak to that experience I was having at the time really carried me through,
06:59 I would say, especially those first six months with my mom no longer being here.
07:03 So I'm just hoping to add this record kind of to, you know, kind of offered up to other folks that are mourning their loved ones.
07:10 And I hope it can be a soundtrack for them to know that, you know, they're not alone in this.
07:15 And especially because I get pretty specific about some more morbid topics around grief,
07:22 like I'm talking about shaking people's hands by the casket at my mother's viewing.
07:26 I'm talking about, I think, in the same song, like her ashes being on the mantle of my grandmother,
07:32 like those details that I think are really hard for us to reckon with while we're grieving.
07:36 I hope people hear that and just see their own experience in that and feel less isolated.
07:42 Absolutely. And if you're comfortable, could you share a little bit just about, you know, what each song means?
07:48 Not all of them off the track, just a couple, just so people can get an idea of what they're going to hear.
07:52 So the first song, Jacqueline, is my song to my mother, pretty much addressed to her.
08:02 And it was the first song I wrote.
08:06 After I lost my mom, I probably wrote about a month after my mom had passed away,
08:10 and the chorus is this refrain that's me saying, "Jacqueline, ain't that a shame? Jacqueline, you're not to blame.
08:23 I'm just pissed off and bitter. I couldn't save my mother. I'm grappling with what I've got left. Jacqueline."
08:29 And that was kind of my note to my mom, I think.
08:34 You know, to say that I, you know, my mom passed by suicide, and it was my song to my mom in a way to be like,
08:41 I'm not blaming you for this. I'm not blaming you for the mental illness or the addiction that you were struggling with.
08:48 And I know even as deeply as I'm hurting right now as a result of you passing by suicide, it's not your fault.
08:57 And I think it was my first window of trying to have some compassion for my mom in the aftermath of losing her.
09:02 Related to that first track, then the record closes with a song called "Kiki."
09:07 And that was, I think, the song I wrote closest to recording the album down at Sonic Ranch.
09:13 And that song is titled after the nickname that my mom had given to me as a kid.
09:18 So my mom often called me Kiki.
09:20 And I really felt like I didn't have, like most people, I didn't have this perfect moment of closure after I lost my mom.
09:34 And a lot of people don't get that.
09:36 That's not, you know, a unique experience to me.
09:38 But I wrote the song from my mom's perspective.
09:42 I wrote it from her perspective after she passed and hoping what she would say to me now if she could speak to me now.
09:50 So it's a little, you know, it's sung by a different vocalist.
09:54 It's Sam of Iron and Wine.
09:56 He sings the vocal as my mom's voice.
09:58 And he has this really beautiful, omniscient kind of narrator type of quality to his voice sometimes.
10:05 And I'm so grateful that he sang on the song.
10:07 But yeah, it really feels like, you know, that kind of bookends this whole record where I'm talking about talking to my mom,
10:14 talking so much about my own experience grieving and missing her and a few other topics.
10:19 And then it closes with what, you know, I hope my mom would say to me now.
10:23 The album is called One for Jackie.
10:25 And that title comes from the song on the record One for Jackie, One for Crystal.
10:30 That is my murder ballad on the record.
10:34 It is the way I helped myself work through a lot of rage that I carried with me for well over a year towards a man
10:47 that unfortunately had gotten away with abusing my mother when she was a child.
10:52 And the song, you know, it's a murder ballad.
10:54 It's quite violent.
10:56 But I don't know.
11:00 I feel like women are often, you know, not always given the room or the space to just express the rage in response to horrible acts of violence that have been committed against them.
11:18 And even though I, you know, my mom was the person who was the survivor of the abuse, I really just carried this deep anger and, you know, almost wanting to seek vengeance on behalf of my mom and what she had to live through.
11:37 And yeah, I guess that song is about that.
11:45 And I didn't want my own personal, like, you know, favorites to influence it, but I do really love Flea Market, Ballet, Fortune Teller.
11:53 Like, there's so many that are absolutely beautiful.
11:57 So, you know, just congratulations on all of those.
12:01 The last thing I did want to bring up is that I know you're going on tour.
12:03 If you want to tease any of those dates for everybody.
12:07 Yeah, yeah.
12:09 So I'll be on tour doing some album release shows this November.
12:11 I'll be in Washington, D.C. on November 6th at the Pie Shop.
12:17 I'll also be at the Mercury Lounge in New York City, November 8th, and then Nashville, Tennessee, November 10th at a little room called The Basement.
12:25 And yeah, I'll have some bandmates with me.
12:29 It'll be a really, even though it's an album about death and loss, it'll be also kind of like a celebration of life in a way.
12:37 people are able to make it out.