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FunTranscript
00:00 [music]
00:26 Howdy strangers. Now I ain't aiming to pick no argument or nothing. Understand?
00:33 'Cause anybody knows them old kibbered wagons look powerful slow creaking and groaning across them planes.
00:41 But let me tell you about one of them wagon trains that sought a speed record back in, uh, '48?
00:48 Or was it '49? Ain't been busted yet.
00:52 No sirree. Not even by one of your dad-blasted aerial planes.
00:58 Now we were just leaving Nebraska, going into Florida.
01:02 Hold on there!
01:04 [crash]
01:05 Weren't Florida.
01:07 Were, uh, Pennsylvania.
01:12 Well, anyways, I was up ahead scouting for engines on my old horse, Hamlet.
01:18 [music]
01:24 Called him Hamlet 'cause he had a pretty bad case of stage fright.
01:29 Well, we kept pushing west through New York.
01:33 Buffalo, New York.
01:35 When doggone my britches if we ain't spotted by them there pesky redskins.
01:41 [music]
01:55 Bug!
01:57 [music]
02:11 No!
02:12 Weren't I ever engine in these old United States?
02:16 Gathered for a powwow.
02:18 They was all of them there.
02:21 A Blackfoot.
02:23 An old patchy chief.
02:25 Yep, an old crazy horse.
02:29 And a Cleveland engine.
02:32 Then come big chief rain in the face.
02:36 [music]
02:45 Bug!
02:46 [music]
02:56 [music]
03:06 [music]
03:16 [music]
03:26 [music]
03:46 [music]
03:56 [music]
04:10 Bug!
04:11 [music]
04:31 Engine!
04:32 Indians!
04:33 [music]
04:40 We really caught with a...
04:42 Flatfoot.
04:44 [music]
04:55 [snoring]
04:59 [music]
05:21 Bug!
05:22 [music]
05:32 I was knocking them off like flies.
05:35 [music]
05:39 Another engine bit the dust.
05:41 [music]
05:46 [music]
05:52 They threw everything at us but the kitchen sink.
05:55 [music]
05:58 All of a sudden we have come out ammunition.
06:00 Our goose sure was cooked.
06:03 We was goners.
06:04 Dead ducks, wiped out, massacred.
06:07 [music]
06:17 Hey, wait a minute.
06:19 Whoa, hold on there.
06:21 Just when we was about to give up, along come a tornado.
06:25 [tornado]
06:27 A twisting and a turning and a swallowing up everything.
06:30 Just like one of them new fangled vacuum cleaners.
06:33 Swallowed up every last one of them. Wagons and all.
06:37 [music]
06:40 Well, partner, that old tornado just took us across them plains and mountains.
06:45 Quicker than you could say Jack Robinson.
06:47 [laughs]
06:48 Some of us settled in Oregon and Nevada and in California.
06:52 And some of us went a little too far west.
06:55 So long, strangers.
06:57 Don't take no wooden engines.
06:59 [music]