• 10 years ago
Something Big (1971)
PG-13 | 108 min | Comedy, Western | November 1971 (USA)

Joe Baker has a dream. He wants to do 'something big.' When he needs a Gatling gun to accomplish this, he seeks out a black marketeer. The price he wants for the gun? A woman! So Baker kidnaps a woman off of the stagecoach, only to find that she is the wife of the commandant of the local Cavalry detachment. Things get further complicated when a girl named Dover McBride shows up. She has come to force Baker to marry her and return east, as he promised to do four years earlier.

Director: Andrew V. McLaglen

Writer: James Lee Barrett

Stars: Dean Martin, Brian Keith, Carol White
Transcript
00:00One thing for sure, as I'm standing here, we know he's out there right now, somewhere holding up another stagecoach.
00:08Question, gentlemen, why is he doing it?
00:12Why?
00:31Apache flat!
00:58You folks better come in.
01:00This'll be your last drink of water before I'm driving home.
01:28What's going on here?
01:31Who are you? What do you want?
01:57I'm going to see you shot!
01:58And who's going to do the shooting?
02:01It may interest you to know that my name is Marianna Morgan.
02:04My husband is the commanding officer of the port at Dry Wells.
02:08Is that the best you can think of to scare me?
02:11You cannot be the colonel's lady, lassie.
02:13And why not?
02:15Every man in the territory knows that the colonel is married to a cold lady who lives back east.
02:20Aye, a cold, frigid, barren woman we need her, I saw.
02:25You know the colonel?
02:26We met along the way.
02:28And I suppose he told you all this about his wife?
02:31He didn't have to.
02:33What other kind of a woman would make a man live alone to do his duty?
02:36How's your health?
02:38Your belly ever hurt you?
02:40I beg your pardon?
02:41Or your head, or anything?
02:43Tell you one thing, you sure do look like everything is in order.
02:48See you in a minute, Tommy.
02:50Bye.
02:56Bye.